The Bill Simmons Podcast - Three for KC, MVP Mahomes, Shanahan’s Error, Craziest Bets, and More Super Bowl Reactions With Cousin Sal

Episode Date: February 12, 2024

The Ringer’s Bill Simmons is joined by Cousin Sal to recap Super Bowl LVIII, talk winners and losers, highlight the biggest moments, update legacies, review their gambling ledgers, and more! Host: Bill Simmons Guest: Cousin Sal Producer: Kyle Crichton The Ringer is committed to responsible gaming, please checkout theringer.com/RG to find out more or listen to the end of the episode for additional details. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Coming up, the Super Bowl was terrible. And then all of a sudden, it wasn't. That's next. This episode is brought to you by Prime Video. You know me, I can't go a day without sports. I really can't. And now Monday nights are all about hockey. That's right.

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90 calories per 355 mil can. So why not grab some Miller Lites today? Your game time tastes like Miller time. Must be legal drinking age. We're also brought to you by the Ringer Podcast Network. I have new rewatchables coming for you Monday night. It is the live show we did from Washington, D.C. on Forrest Gump.

Meet Mallory, Sean, Chris. This was an unbelievable show. One of the most fun podcasts I've done in a long, long time. The crowd was great. Mallory was out of her mind. Probably the perfect movie to do in front of a live audience.

So that is coming. Check out the Prestige TV podcast, by the way, because we are breaking down True Detective every week there. We have, I think, Mr. and Mrs. Smith. We have something coming up on that this week, if you're watching that one. And then Andy Greenwald's new show, which is called Stick the Landing, he dives into the series finales of great shows. Did Girls last week, did The Office the week before, Mad Men, and Friday Night Lights so far. I'm going to be on that show a little bit later in the season

doing one of my favorite shows ever. So stay tuned for that. Cousin Sal and I are about to break down a Super Bowl that I have so many notes, I don't know, even know if we're going to be able to cover anything. Such a great game that I think we have to do something special for the top of the podcast. You know, we always run the same Pearl Jam song at the top. What if we ran a new song that

nobody's ever heard that might be being released this week? That, you know, maybe they have a new album coming out. Maybe the irony of Taylor Swift when her album's coming out, maybe Pearl Jam has their own version of that. Anyway, here's a little sneak peek. But first, Pearl Jam! All right, we're taping this at 8.40 p.m. It is about 45 minutes or so after the Super Bowl ended. We needed some time. We needed some time to go through notes.

We needed some time to rehash what happened. That was one of the more action-packed games. I think just coming off of Super Bowl, we've been doing this for a while, like Pat's Eagles and Pat's Falcons were probably the craziest that we've done. This one was terrible for, what, an hour and a half? And then all of a sudden, it became pretty awesome.

Well, two and a half real hours. Yeah, from 3.30 Pacific time to 6, it was kind of bad, right? Yeah. I won't count Usher in there. That was great. We saw nipples and everything. But yeah, I jokingly tweeted, this game is awful, like three plays in. I'm like, oh, this holds up 90 minutes later.

I don't need to add to it. So we could start with the bad or we could start with the good. I want to start with the good. This was kind of that last thing Mahomes needed for this incredible 20s that he's having. Hench texted us

there's an inevitability now when the other team doesn't put him away and you're like, oh man. He gets the ball with 15't put him away and you're like, oh man, you know, he gets the ball with 153 left down three and you're like, ah, they should have scored. He's at least going to be able to come down and get a field goal. He gets it. Then in overtime, again, they have to settle for three. It's like, oh man, he's, he's at least getting three. He's probably getting a touchdown. And somewhere after they crossed the 50, it was like, he's scoring. And it was the same.

Brady had it. You know, if you go in different sports, there's been certain athletes that, you know, Jordan obviously is the most famous for this. You're just like, oh man, they blew their chance. He's finishing this now. And as great as Mahomes is, and he's done this in all different forms,

but this one in the Super Bowl was the exclamation point for me. I felt the same way. And you and I, we were texting back and forth on multiple chains about who's the MVP. And it's like, well, it only could be Juwan Jennings, Moody, or Butker. And then like, oh, we're idiots. Of course, it's Mahomes. Of course, he's going to have like 180 yards in the last three drives.

And that's going to be that. But what? He ended up with 333, two touchdowns, a ho-hum first half. We don't know what they were doing offensively. The Niners just looked like they were in different gear. And then he's like, all right, it's halftime. He's never had the lead in a Super Bowl, and he's won three of them now. Right.

That half. Yeah, they had 16 total yards after the first quarter. Right. Yeah. They had 16 total yards after the first quarter. And I went into halftime, even it seemed like Lombardi always calls it the middle eight, which is the last four minutes of the second quarter. The first four minutes of third quarter, we knew the Chiefs were getting the ball and it felt like the Chiefs were going to score a touchdown heading into halftime. They didn't. And it was 10-3, but it still felt like, all right, the Niners feel like they should be up 20 here. Now the Chiefs are going to get the ball. And it just felt like the Chiefs were going to have the lead at some point. But the big plays that weren't Mahomes

related were the punt hitting a guy's foot. Definitely. Which is just the dagger when it's your team or a team you bet on. It's just the dumbest, most inexplicable. You can't even blame anybody. You can't get mad. How do you even avoid a punt like that? I'm amazed it does that more often. And then Moody's PAT getting blocked was the other one

because that's the difference between them being up four or three and then Mahomes just needs the field goal. But just those two little plays that can swing the Super Bowl with Brady and the Pats, the six Superbowls, it was always like one or two of those you needed on your side. Yeah. And just think of all the playoffs, how it's like that, right? Unless it's my team against the Packers, there's just like one or two plays that separate either the winner and the loser in all those games basically, right? So by the way, I had 26-22 on Ringer Wiseguys. It was 25-22 final.

They don't kick the extra point. Did you really? I knew they don't kick the extra point, but still, I was hoping they would just for me. I mean, for God's sakes, what a triumph that would be. How did you end up with 22? That's so weird. I don't know. I don't know. I did a lot of calculating. By the way, you were 1-11 heading in the game. You're back, baby. We don't have to mention that. I mean, I just- Well, you were slumping a little bit. You were one and 11 headed in the game. You're back, baby. We don't have to mention that. I mean, just 26, 22. You were slumping a little bit.

I hit my two big bets on million dollar picks and I hit all my real life big bets, including a 13 point tease, which is just the bet of the year. It hit again. Chiefs to 15, Niners the other way to like 11, the over and the under.

It just, there was never a doubt. The over, anything tied to any kind of over, teased or otherwise had no business winning. And I think it like, boy, the real over closed I think at 46 and a half. So it went over by a half. Depending on when you had it. But really, what was it?

13-10 going into the fourth? Oh my God. Good job by you. So it was 47 and a half for a big chunk of the week. Oh my God. Good job by you. So it was 47.5 for a big chunk of the week. And then it ended at 46.5. And then of course 25-22 ends up at 47. It's basically in the middle. So I can't remember. Is that

bad for Vegas or it's good for Vegas? The under got bad enough that people were banging it at 47.5. So all those people won. But then if you had the over of 46.5, all those people won. So then if you had the over of 46 and a half, all those people won. So I'm guessing that was bad. Plus all the Kelsey,

all the props for him hit. The Mahomes over for passing yards hit. Right. The Kelsey touchdowns didn't hit. The McCaffrey touchdown hit. That was a big one. The Kelsey over yards, which looked like it was dead to rights.

That hit. He had 93. They cleaned up a lot of the props. I got to tell you something. We've been doing this for 135 years. I don't get what Vegas needs anymore. It's like every casino manager or director that they interview, like, we need the 49ers big.

We need the 49ers big. I'm like, okay, why is it still two and a half? Why are the Chiefs still getting two and a half? Make the Chiefs two and a half and get middle like everybody else. I don't, and I know I'm stupid. People are laughing at me saying that, but I don't get why it was two and a half for the team that everybody was betting. Well, big winners, Patrick Mahomes.

Yeah. Our own Raheem Palmer from Ringer Wiseguys. Great job. Up and down season for him and then was pushing Chiefs 10-1 to win the Super Bowl really hard. Heading into the last stretch of the season. That hit. Biggest loser. We got to talk about it.

Kyle Shanahan. Wow. These are new playoff or new Super Bowl rules where it doesn't matter what you could score eight points on your first drive the other team is still

getting the ball and I don't think people fully realize the ramifications of who goes first who goes second until we were watching the game

I thought it was interesting that they went first my thinking was maybe he felt like his defense was tired but then as you watched it unfold it was such an advantage then as you watched it unfold,

it was such an advantage to go second that it's like now after watching that anyone who picks, we want the ball first. And that situation is the biggest moron on the planet. Now people are saying right now, Shanahan was an absolute moron for, you know, not kicking off.

And, you know, cause you have all these different advantages. It basically becomes the, all the nerd stuff that we always make fun of, of like the fourth down probability, fourth to one third way. Like you just know you have four downs on every part of the series and you get to behave differently. It almost feels like a, like a little bit of a superpower. And once I think we all realize that, at least for me, I know Romo mentioned a little bit, but when did you realize, oh my God, that was such a mistake going first?

Well, here's the thing. If you go first, you have to score a touchdown, right? There's nothing wrong with going first if you're going to get seven, right? So you have to be in that mindset all the way through. And by the way, they were lucky they didn't punt after three plays, right? Purdy almost threw that interception on. Yeah. Almost through that interception. Yeah. I needed that interception. Oh my God.

I forgot about that. They had dropped the pick. I know. It was terrible. That was like my big prop bet there. So not a, not a total winner, of course.

And then yes, the third down penalty on like third and 14. And there's like a five yard holding. And, and that was that. But, but yeah, you got to score,

man. And I think you're right. I think that's the only reasoning going into that, why you would take the ball. The Chiefs defense is gassed. Let's take them out now. And our defense is also gassed. Let's give them a rest. But you have to do it. And Purdy looked great on that drive.

The deking and everything else and that pass to whose check, that was phenomenal, but they couldn't get it. I think McCaffrey needed to be involved in that third down play and he wasn't. So they had that play to Huchek, that was phenomenal, but they couldn't get it. I think McCaffrey needed to be involved in that third down play, and he wasn't. So they had that play to the fullback where I don't know what a catch is anymore. I know we talk about this all the time.

I just don't know. He made two steps, turned around, put the ball down, wasn't touched. Ball immediately goes out of his hands and it was a catch. They didn't even challenge it. First down and goal from the 15. They ran McCaffrey for six. So now it's

second and four from the KC9. They run McCaffrey again. He gets stuffed. Third and four. And Chris Jones over to... I asked Lombardi what were the Chiefs doing. He just said it was like blitz zero over and over again, and San Francisco never solved it. Chris Jones comes in and bats the pass down.

So they're in the nine, and I guess the announcers didn't even talk about it, but the question is, do you just go for it on fourth and four? They had gone for it on a fourth and three earlier in the game, and they got it to Kittle to keep a drive going. That was pretty ballsy. I was really surprised they went for that.

This time around, they kicked the field goal, and I don't think anybody was surprised. But knowing the rules, maybe you're better off going for it. And I don't know what the numbers said either way, but maybe you're better off going for it. If you don't get it, they're stuck at the nine. They still have to go 60 yards for a field goal versus them being the nine. They still have to go 60 yards for a field goal versus them being at the 25.

They have to go 60 yards for a field goal anyway. So the number's kind of even out, but you have a chance to go up seven. Did you think at all they should have gone for it there? No, I thought they were about a yard, yard and a half too long to go for it there. And I know what you're saying, but the key to having Mahomes

and the inevitability and everything, you also have Butker. So if you're down, if you have nothing, you really just have to cross midfield and that guy's going to kick it. Yeah, it's going to be a foot above the crossbar, but he's going to get it in and that'll be that. So I don't

kill him. I just kill him for taking the ball. But again, I can't see the defense. I can't see he was breathing heavy and on the sideline and everything else. So if your defense was dead, maybe you do need the rest and you need to take the ball. But he is going to get a lot of crap for it. Well, they lost Greenlaw because he was running out on the field and Taylor Swift telepathically blew out his Achilles.

Is that what happened? Yeah, I just read that on the internet. Yeah, she looked really hard like the little kid in Yeah. I just read that on the internet. Yeah. She looked really hard. Like, uh, like the, the little kid in fire starter and just blew out his ghost. Now he, he got hurt running in where it's like when shit like that happens, sometimes I wonder,

are you destined to win the super bowl? If one, if one of your best guys in your front seven just blows an Achilles out randomly, just running into the gas. Yeah. Not even celebrating. Not even Edwin Diaz.

Yeah. Yeah. Maybe, maybe that's a bad sign. Poor Shanahan. He has that 28-3 comeback that the Pats had against him where he had multiple chances to put the

game away on offense because they had that Julio Jones catch. They really needed five more yards to ice the game and somehow went backwards. Had to punt. Brady got the ball. It comes back down. The Falcons never get the ball again. So he's haunted by that. Then the Jimmy G Super Bowl where they're in the game and Jimmy G over

deep throw just misses the guy. Yeah. They're up 10 in that game. They blew the weed. And then this was the worst. Sal, I have an announcement. I think Kyle Shanahan has now joined the Bills

and the Browns and the Lions and the Vikings. Oh, wow. Really? I think he's there now. He's had three horrible losses, which is as bad as some of those other teams in the last 30 years. So I think, at least from a coach standpoint,

he's the first one I think of now. This is killing him. I don't think he's done yet, so I don't want to crush him altogether. But you're right. I'm not crushing him. I'm just saying I feel bad for him. Those are three horrible losses now.

If I'm him, and you can't say this at a press conference, I'd be like, the fucking punt hit my up back or whatever, and Greenlaw went out. We're trying to jog onto the field. And my kicker had a PAT blocked, which happens three times a year.

Yeah, exactly. In the league. Yeah, and we're going to give Mahomes five quarters to not get to Patrick Mahomes' level? That's just what's going to happen. But yeah, he's pretty much cursed at this point. Let's come back to the Cowboys. It felt like just...

And I had a huge rooting interest on the Chiefboys. It's felt like just, and I had, you know, huge rooting interest on the chiefs, even though Brady's legacy, I probably should have been rooting against my homes, but I just, I just not betting against my homes anywhere. But McCaffrey was 22 for 80 running and he was eight for 80 receiving. And just eye test watching it every time they put him out left to right. I was completely terrified. It was like, oh my God.

Who's covering McCaffrey? Oh my God, they have a linebacker on McCaffrey. There was one time when he had it and Romo was like, oh Jim, oh Jim. And then Purdy called a timeout. It's like, oh man, why did he call timeout there? Can I give Romo some love here? I know we know him and people are going to be like,

oh, shut the F up, Sal. But he was great. He crushed that game. I know we know him and people are going to be like, oh, shut the F up, Sal, but he was great. He crushed that game. I think he got, once the game got good, when the game wasn't good, he's like singing Adele. He's trying to keep like,

you know, Taylor Swift is pounding beers. It was like, this is a boring ass game, but when it got going, he grabbed the whole of it. He's like, this guy's going to,

he's like, oh, people don't want to see me tell us straight too bad. I'm blowing this game for everyone. Look at this. Purdy called the timeout. He had the matchups he wanted there. Why did he do that? Look at this. This is what it's going to be. This guy

is going to go into motion. Everything else. He nailed that game. Good job by you, Tony Romo. Wow. That was a real bad night for the haters. People hate Mahomes. People hate Taylor Swift. People hate Romo. Everyone who's great. I wouldn't want to be a conspiracy theorist

tonight. Do people hate my homes? I feel like he's on some different plane. Like if you hate my homes, you're probably a fan of a team that is directly competing with them every year. Like I can understand if, yeah, if you're a Broncos fan,

I would hate mom. So like, Oh my God, this guy, they more hate the chiefs, but they, yeah, because of this Taylor Swift thing. But I looked it up. They were really good before she came along. I looked, they more hate the Chiefs, but they, because of this Taylor Swift thing.

But I looked it up. They were really good before she came along. I looked, I was like, oh wow, this is interesting. They're like Super Bowl champs and everything.

Let's take a break and then we're going to talk about KC Big Picture. This episode is brought to you by Movember. The mustache is back with a vengeance. Look at Travis Kelsey.

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but let's do it again. So then the Dynasty Talk will start this week with KC. They've been in the mix. They've been in the final four, I think every year that Mahomes has been around. They've won three Super Bowls now. They lost one. And he's on the same Super Bowl pace that Brady was on, heading toward the end of his 20s. And people are now like, is this a dynasty? I guess it's a mini dynasty to me,

but I still feel like dynasty has sustained excellence throughout a decade. So it really, there's like a level one dynasty, which is like what Lombardi's Packers did and what the Celtics did, where it's just like, they just kind of owned 10 to 13 years. And then there's kind of that other shorter version of it,

like what your Cowboys had. The Yankees winning four and five is probably like, nah, that feels like, like you get four and five, that kind of feels like a dynasty. So I don't know. I've never felt like we fully figured out what the word dynasty means. Is it Warriors?

Is it Warriors right now? And he's Steph? Yeah, so when the Warriors won their fourth, that became a debate because they'd won four in, I think, seven years. It's kind of the same, right? But there was two, one year, one year they were,

they got the second best draft pick of the league because they were But there was two, one year they got the second best draft pick of the league because they were so bad. And then another year they lost in a playing game. So it's like is that sustained excellence or are we just counting on the highest level? Regardless, the Chiefs are the most memorable team since the Brady team. So I think we can, we've said, yeah, we've

had three memorable teams in this century and they're the two incarnations of the Brady BelBelichick teams and then this Chiefs team. I think that's where I'm at mentally. That's fine. And why do people have to compare him to Brady right now? Brady went for 20 years.

That's freaking phenomenal. Mahomes is on his way. Mahomes is the most exciting quarterback to watch. So it's fine. He passes Montana, as far as I'm concerned, as quarterbacks that I've seen. Maybe he had already done it. I will say this.

I think if he could trade a Super Bowl, I'd love for someone to ask him this. I think he would want that win over Brady, even though he was a fucking year. In 2018, yeah. Versus the Eagles. Would you give up the Eagles? Yeah. Would you give up the Eagles Super Bowl to have the Brady Super Bowl? Oh, swap them.

Yeah, because that puts them closer. It's like, I beat Brady. I don't want to hear anything. Still not there, but I think you would rather have that one. I would have said the 2018 AFC title game. Would he take a win there and not know if he was going to win a Super Bowl next

versus the Eagles one? That's good. I think for me, I'm old enough that I've seen all of the good quarterbacks during the Eagles one. That's good. I think for me, I'm old enough that I've seen all the good quarterbacks during the throwing era. And I always had, coming out of college, I was like,

it was just Montana. We all agreed Montana was the GOAT, right? And he came through over and over again for a few years there when the league was totally different and guys were getting a shit kick that you could dive at a quarterback's knees, you could pile drive them.

Jim Burtt knocked them unconscious, all that stuff. And it was just so much harder to be a good quarterback for a long time. So I have him. Elway was probably, from a talent standpoint, way up there. I don't know if he was quite... Yeah, I wouldn't put him on the Montana Brady Mahomes level. But for me, it's Brady and then Mahomes and then Montana right now as the three best I've seen.

And then probably Elway would get the four spot. Who do you have as your four? I can't say Trey Aikman. Oh, no. I can't? All right. We haven't read the end of the Dak Prescott story yet. Now, I'd say Elway fourth, but Elway's weird because he did it

towards the end of his career, right? Right. He wasn't the best guy in his own offense anymore. Yeah. If you matched up the first six years of Mahomes versus first six of Elway, you're like, no, these guys don't belong in the same conversation. But I throw him fourth. I don't even know who would be round up the top five. Who would we even say? Marino, me personally, I just felt like I was just abjectly terrified of that dude for, I don't know, 15. Even when he couldn't move anywhere, I was terrified of him.

Anyway, Mahomes has moved. Oh, we got to put Peyton. I think we got to put Peyton five though, right? After everything. Yeah, probably. He had some bad losses though, man. Yeah. I was just watching the other day,

watching, it was popped on like Twitter or Instagram or something that Saints pick six to end the Super Bowl. That was. Right. Almost like, man, doesn't get enough credit for how bad that was.

But yeah, Peyton's probably fifth. I think that's fair. Peyton and Marino, I have them right next to each other. It still feels like the right defense could get to those guys because they couldn't really move around.

Well, for sure now. A couple. So Mahomes ends 333, 34 for 46, and he was nine for 66 rushing and had some huge. So all those rushing attempts, rushing over, all that stuff, that all hit as well. And then Travis Kelsey, nine for 93,

a couple of huge, huge, huge catches, especially the one at the end of the fourth quarter when he got that 20-plus yarder to put them inside the 10. Now he's got three rings. Now it's him versus Gronk. I still think Gronk's when you throw in the blocking, to me,

it's still no contest, but Kelsey's putting the resume together. I have to see Kelsey kick a field goal first before I could say anything. It was Gronk. Gronk missed again for FanDuel. It was wide. Yeah.

Very, very bad. 25-yarder. And he's from Buffalo. So do you think he just psychologically wants to push it? He actually looked mad that he missed. But yeah, Gronk. I mean, you look at Gronk and the blocking stuff, right? You're going to go down as one of the better blocking tight ends of all time. And it was one of those

things when he played, if you took away his touchdowns, as far as fantasy went, he was still the number one tight end for like three straight years. Right. The Kelsey Mahomes combo is definitely moving up the ladder. You're going to put Montana and Rice first

and then Brady Gronk and whoever else you want to put. I think that combo has gotten there. He even survived. It feels like it happened five days ago. But the bizarre, him shoving Andy Reid and then screaming at him, and CBS shows it, and they're like, whoa. And then they never discussed it again.

And meanwhile, everyone on social media is like, wait, what just happened? Can I ask? He's like 68? What the... And good for Andy Reid for being 350 pounds. Because he would have got... What if he falls over? What if it's like a Don Zimmer situation?

What if he got hurt? What if he broke his wrist? He really could have. And what did Kelsey want anyway? Wasn't that a first down play where Pacheco fumbled? They just handed off to Pacheco. And he got... It was a great strip and he fumbled.

I think he was mad he wasn't in the game. No, I know, but what's he going to... All right. Pacheco's probably getting the ball there anyway. I don't know. If you're Taylor Swift, you're looking at that like, whoa. Hey, let's talk about this. If I grab your pillow in the middle of the night

by accident, are we good? Are we going to have a problem? So Kelsey goes from that and he's not getting the ball and it looks like they might lose to becomes one of the heroes down the stretch. They win the game in OT. He goes on stage and sings Viva Las Vegas and then has the long kiss with Taylor Swift,

which CBS was very, very eager to show. Um, the other big winner. Well, there's two more big winners, actually. Andy Reed, three,

three, uh, rings down for him. There was a time in the playoff manifesto where it was like, never bet against it. Never bet on Andy Reed was in the playoff manifesto for years. He shed that one, 258 regular season wins.

He's now 26 and 60 in the playoffs. And this feels sustainable for a few more years. He's only, I think he's 44 behind Belichick right now. Belichick's taking the year off. So that's becoming more and more of a conversation. And it's like Belichick when Brady that last year, and they just passed the torch to read him a home. So I'm like, here, here's the torch. Here you go. Well, he's 65, right? He's okay for another, I mean, as long as his players stop beating him up on the sidelines, I think he's last. As long as he's not attacked by a tight end.

Yeah, another half a dozen years for sure. No, it's a great deal. And the Chiefs are terrific. I mean, we could go over next year's odds and you want to save that, but it's always a good bet. Well, they, you know, especially they look so sloppy and

disjointed in the first hour of the game. It's like, man, you had two weeks to prepare. These are your plays, like Pacheco in the line. There's even that play. Was that the tying drive or the winning drive when Valdez scantling? He goes backwards and all of a sudden

it's like second and 14. They had a lot of those. It didn't really seem like they trusted any of their receivers deep. The one time Mahomes did throw deep, he connected with Hardman. Yeah, his safety got lost a little bit. But Pacheco tried to kill them.

He really did. It was just, I don't know, the fumble and the running into the line. He just kept tackled right away, it seemed like. He looked like an undersized back, should, getting swallowed up by a good defense. But even so, the other thing where Mahomes had, again, rightly called by Romo, should have spiked the ball. And then I'm like, oh,, should have spiked the ball. And then I'm like,

oh, maybe he shouldn't spike the ball. It's like, oh, Pacheco's still 20 yards away from getting set with the line of scrimmage. Like, he should have, I don't know. He seemed out of it today. Well, and then Spagnuolo, he got four rings now as the defensive coordinator because he got one with the Giants.

And I think three with the Chiefs, or it's two with the Giants, two with the Chiefs. I can't remember, but he's got four. And he basically took the Niners. I don't know. They had all their set plays, which is a Shanahan specialty for like first 15-20. Once they finished, he was like a bowl constrictor.

He just shut everything down, started getting a push up the middle. They weren't giving up big plays at all. There was no big plays downfield. McCaffrey, even though he was involved, he had like 28 touches. Never really. He only was one time when he was really running loose

and just kind of shut him down. I actually thought Purdy was really good in that game. He made some pulled out of his ass under big pressure, like sidearm throws on the back. I really thought he played well. Spagnuolo was great. The Houshchak

play was one of the best I've seen all year. Getting shed and oncoming rush and everything, but Spagnuolo's defense played great. They had four tackles for losses. They only had one sack, Carl Aptis and Reed split it. Bolton played great on defense. They held the 49ers to

low 20s. If you have Patrick Mahomes and you got that, you're going to win almost every time. San Francisco is up 10-0. They were up 10-6 with KC punting in the third quarter when that punt hit one of their guys. Right. And Casey

got the ball back. They were up 16 to 16 with five minutes left with a real chance to just put the game away. And Mahomes never touches the ball. And we've, we've been on the opposite side of this with our teams, or when you bet on something, you like oh man there's not enough time like if they can just move the ball down move the ball down yeah this is it they're gonna be able to run out the clock but that third and uh what third and four third and five when when you know they're able to pressure pretty they didn't get it they kicked the field goal and then the ot the combo took the ball first and then had to settle for the field goal the big play was well one of the plays was the mc took the ball first and then had to settle for the field goal. The big play was, well, one of the plays was the McDuffie.

He's blitzing. He tips a pass. And then the other one was Chris Jones forcing a completion. They just couldn't make that last play. And I don't even know if it was Purdy's fault. Do you blame him for any of those? No, I don't think so. But we didn't see him on the run that much, right?

No. So I feel like that's where the inexperience maybe comes in. It's like, all right, this spot might be too big for me, so I'm not going to take it. I'm not going to call my own number. He didn't run at all. Oh, he had three rushes for 12 yards. But, you know, last week or conference championship game,

he had three 15-yard or more rushes. So that's what they needed out of him. But I'm not going to kill him at all. He was fantastic. It just, the bounty of excellence was more in the first half and then like one drive in fourth quarter overtime. So Mahomes got the ball, the 153 left,

got a field goal, got the ball left in OT, touchdown drive. And that's it, man. Mahomes, just a little bit better than Brock Purdy. I still feel like that was a win for Purdy and and it was a win for the ringer Stephen Ruiz, who was walking around. He said he was walking around the Vegas stadium at halftime just filling out job applications to work there next year in the Vegas stadium if he had to retire because- I got to give it to Ruiz. I know he killed Purdy all year. He had him like below.

Who was Joe Burrell's backup? Browning. I don't know. But he stuck to it. And I think like when he was on Ringer Wise, guys, we asked him who the MVP is going to be. He's like, I'm going to go like someone like Chris Jones. I'm like, oh, you're really, really going on this anti-Brock Purdy thing.

Yeah. Yeah, I am. Whatever. He's stuck in. He just has his feelings. The only other thing I had was the Tyreek trade. He was probably the best receiver in the league last year. And if he wasn't the best receiver,

he was one of the best two or three. And they trade the guy and they win two more Super Bowls. That goes down as one of the ballsiest best trades anyone's made in the NFL in a while. Yeah, definitely. You trade your best weapon and it doesn't matter. You're still cruising along. I'm trying to think what else.

Oh, there was a Mahomes-Brady moment. So there's a sliding doors moment in this game where they're down three and they're driving. There's a couple of times where it seemed like Casey might not even get the game to overtime. And if he didn't get it, like my dad was just all in on Mahomes failing because he just wants Brady to be the best guy. So he didn't want the Chiefs to win.

He was upset. He just wants the Brady mistake to live on forever. I could see that. And there was a couple of moments where it was like, oh man, if Mahomes doesn't get this, okay, we're good with Brady for a while. And then now we're not. Through the interception, right? It was like, all right, this could maybe be

something there. Yeah, and Tony was talking about how he seemed like he was moving, the game was moving too, his pace was too fast. Like he just was a little off his game, but he settled down because he's Patrick Mahomes. Um, all right,

let's, let's take a break and then we'll talk about some of the, uh, some of the prop bets and some of the stuff with this game. All right. So the MVP tonight, it seemed like it was all over the map. And at one point,

Jawan Jennings seemed like he had a puncher's chance. Let's say Mahomes doesn't get it when it's 19-16 and they don't score. The Niners win 19-16. Who is the MVP, though? No question.

I was saying, if there's 19 points and you're responsible for two touchdowns, one throwing, one receiving, he definitely should have won it. They might have given it to Purdy, though, at that point. Oh, see, I think Jennings probably should have won. No, I think McCaffrey would have won. Oh, interesting. Because he had like 25 touches in the game.

Yeah. I think they would have kind of talked himself into who's most impactful. I thought Bosa was incredible for the first three quarters. It seemed like he wore down a little bit. He was great too. He was just torching that right tackle for two hours.

And that Gunner too. That Gunner also. Oh yeah. Conley, the guy who used to be on the Chiefs. That's right. Yeah. That would have been

a weird MVP where we would have just been like, ah, is it really Jawan Jennings? We're going to give him the MVP at 120 to one or whatever it would have been yeah and especially after McCaffrey fumbled and Pacheco fumbled I'm like all right erase the

running back from this equation and then the kickers are blasting these these unheard of like Moody was supposed to we crushed them a couple weeks ago like oh Moody to miss a field goal that's guaranteed that was what I'm Missed extra point was actually the one that really hurt them. But 55 yards and then Butker 57 yards. I'm like, this has got to go to a kicker if it ends up 22-19. But then you look at Mahomes' numbers and he's the star of the show. Yeah. And he was plus 150.

Everybody hated that. They're like, they're no value. But it's good to win once in a while. We talked last week. We talked KC to beat San Francisco in overtime. It was 18-1. That was one of the wins we talked about. I forgot to do it for Million Dollar Picks.

But those were pretty good odds. Just to go to overtime, the game was 11-1. So that was nice. I did have Simmons. First half, San Francisco. Game, Kansas City. 11-1. So that was nice. I did have Simmons. First half, San Francisco. Game, Kansas City. 8-1. I think that might just be the only thing I bet next year. Because I sometimes

win on that. Wait a second. Does that still win if it's a tie after the fourth quarter? What's the ruling on that? Yeah, game. It's the end of the game. So it's a game. I think they should name that bet after you. It never even occurred to me until you started doing the Pittsburgh.

Yeah, the Cousin Sal Special. Why can't FanDuel do that? Yeah, freaking octopus. Disgusting animal has a bet named after it. I could have something. That seemed like... That was the sucker bet of the Super Bowl because I saw that.

It was like plus 980 for an octopus. For people listening, octopus means you catch a touchdown and you get the two point. And it's like, oh yeah, Kelsey could do that. And then you do the research. And I think it happened like three times in 2023. Hertz did it.

He had benefited from the tush push. And it was like plus 980. Yeah, everybody was on that. Heads won. I'm sorry. I gave out tails. The anthem kind of went over. It was sort of middled, right? Yeah, can we talk about that?

That was a controversy. Of course it was. She said, Home of the Brave, and then she's like, no, hold on. I'm going to run this back. And she ran it again another six seconds. You can't do that. First of all, she was coasting through it, right? She was. She's going to go way under, but I think she

might have gone over the original 86, but I think it ended up 93 by kickoff. So it definitely middled there. And no Gatorade, right? What was the Gatorade? I don't think there was any. Oh, I saw something

got dumped on Reed. I didn't know. You did? Yeah, they showed a replay of it because my wife's mom was here and she was very upset because she thought Andy was too old to have a big thing of theory. Oh, yeah, they are. I'm looking at this.

What is this, purple? Yeah, I thought it was purple. Okay, all right. Did we guess purple? I think you might have guessed purple. Or did we say... I think we might have said purple because of Kobe.

That's right, Kobe, right. Four years ago, it should have been when they because of Kobe. That's right. Kobe, right. Four years ago, it should have been when they first matched up. You're right. I'm looking at it now. That's damn purple. By the way, it has to be right after the game, or could they follow him to the lobby of the hotel?

I thought it had to be right after the game. Okay. And then Valdez, Scantling, I had 8-1 for longest reception. It turned out to be Hardman. And I think Hardman's odds were even better. Our Hardman's odds were probably like 12-1, 15-1, longest reception. It turned out to be Hardman. And I think Hardman's odds were even better. Hardman's odds were probably like... Higher than that, yeah. Like 12-1, 15-1, something like that.

I had... The big one I hit was Noah Gray, two plus catches. I was very excited about that. I lost the Mahomes under. I lost the Purdy over three and a half. Kelsey most receptions for the game hit. That was plus 170 a week ago.

That dropped to whatever, but he got that by one over McCaffrey. Yeah. And then all the teases hit. Oh, all the teases. It's crazy how the teases. Oh, your Mahomes rushing that thing killed. All the Mahomes, yeah.

Attempts and rushing runs, that'll hit. I love that over three and a half, and it went to four and a half, and he ended up with nine carries. My big thing with this game was I thought it was going to be a low scoring game just because of how the Chiefs were playing the last five, six weeks, which

seemed to be borne out. And I hit a point where I was like, I'm either going to win three of my big bets or win all four. And then you look at the overtime rows and you're like, wait a second. And it has that college football moment where you're going, I might have nailed this game and we might get to 70 points. It might just completely shatter.

Did you like this more? Do you think this should just be the way we do it in overtime the rest of the way? Yeah, I like it better. I wish Ed clarified that the Chiefs could let that clock run. People are freaking out, texting me like, hey, this quarter's going to end. What's Reed doing with these timeouts? No, if the 49ers had used the whole 15 minutes in their drive,

the Chiefs still would have gotten the ball to retaliate. I like it. I actually think they should play the full quarter. Just play the full quarter. It's the last game. So if it's a Super Bowl overtime, you're up for just, we're adding a fifth quarter. That's it. This is it. It's the last game. So if it's a Super Bowl overtime, you're up for just we're adding a fifth quarter. That's it. This is it. It's the last game. Yeah. And they had a lot of hour at halftime to rest.

Right. Exactly. I did like it. I will say this about the props in general. I feel like the second week hurts a little bit. You could have a good mindset about the game staying under, but then like you get antsy and you start talking to people. I'm like, oh, I like Pacheco over. I like Rice over. I like Iuke over. I'm like, all right, now I'm giving out 15 overs that I don't even like, and I have Xs all through almost all of them.

My most disappointing was Jake Moody not missing a field goal. He was kicking that 55-yarder, and I was like, I'm going to win this in the first quarter. This is amazing. Yeah, right. And then he like was lights out. I mean, Jake Moody, I guess he did get one block,

but that wasn't necessarily his fault. So for the game, Casey had way more yardage. They probably hit a lot of those. There were first down props, all that kind of stuff. Yeah. You want to talk about some of the,

some of the stuff you saw in Vegas? You were there doing a bunch of stuff for Fandle. We had an incredible Ringer Wiseguy show today. For some reason, House didn't want to go to Vegas. He wasn't at the buffet like he said he was? House stayed in D.C. and filmed some buffet stuff. But I don't know why he didn't want to go. So he was remote, but we had really great shows.

But you were there on Radio Row. There was a FanDuel set grabbing people. We had a great time. Give us the report. What was it like? The FanDuel stuff was great. The Ringer was great. The bookings were terrific.

I mean, I talked with Tommy DeVito's agent, which was a thrill. Sean Stellato, whatever his name is. Sean Stellato. I said,ato, whatever his name is. Sean Stilato. I said, all right, you're Italian. And I did props against a lot of athletes and sports personalities. $20 if you can name 15 Italian restaurants in 30 seconds. And he really could have just said anyone's name.

Like Mario's, Joseph's, Antonio's. He could have said that. He got 14 and added the Olive Garden. I didn't count it. I said, get out of here. You're not Italian. Josh Allen was great. He said the Olive Garden was an Italian restaurant?

Yeah. He's like, what? It's absurd. I was like, no, I'm not counting that. Oh, my God. You lose your little Italy card. But yeah, no. So there was that.

It was terrific. We had Josh Allen, Max Crosby, Baker Mayfield, CJ Stroud. I thanked him for winning me Offensive Rookie of the Year Award at 10-1. I even offered him money, and he's like, that's illegal, right? I said, yeah, you answered that right. I don't think it is. I don't want to get you expelled from the league. We didn't talk about that.

The Flacco comeback bet actually won. That killed me. That killed me. Yeah. That's a bad beat for me. You like that? Yeah. I thought it was incredible. He saved their season. You're going right to hell. Hamlin saved

football. Hamlin saved football by coming back. Imagine the vitriol that the game of football would have had if he didn't survive that. Then he suits up. I don't care if he played one snap. Did you have any feeling at all that the Chiefs had to win because that's what

the NFL wanted and we're all living in a script now? Why? There's some real people out there that are arguing this. Yeah. This is what the NFL wanted. Yeah. They is what the NFL wanted. Yeah. They should stop watching football then, right? Like, shut up. Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's not what they wanted

because maybe they don't call the holding on third and seven when the Niners said the ball to start overtime. They probably would have lifted the flag on that. Taylor Swift didn't even know the team colors last year and they won the Super Bowl. Everyone just shut the F up enough. That's so do I add that to the, to the gambling manifesto? Cause my homes is going in now.

It's like you can't bet against Patrick Mahomes unless you have an incredible reason. That's just, I promise you that's a manifesto rule next year is don't bet against whoever, whoever's team Taylor Swift is dating a possible manifesto because she doesn't lose. I mean, she's been on the all time heater at the blackjack table. Anyone's ever had for,

you know, five years. You're right. That's a good one. I'd like to see a list of like those. Yes. The attachments, like when Drake bets on someone,

we go against it. Right. Usually. Well, usually it used to be Adam Corolla, but Carolla's been like he had the Chiefs today. It was always good to zag against him, but this time, not as great.

I don't like it one bit. I'm not going against Taylor. We have some Fandu odds. Yeah. Super Bowl 59. People were mad we didn't remember Derek Thomas was 58. I'm sorry about that.

We're old. We're in our mid-50s. 10, 20 years ago, I would have been dropping 58s left and right. I can barely sit in the same place for 90 minutes. People were really mad at you for not getting Papelbon. I'm like, alright, well that's his problem, not me.

I barely remember any Red Sox numbers. I have a hard time remembering jersey numbers for athletes, just in general. It's one of my weak spots, unless it's like somebody super famous, like Manny number 24, shit like that. Super Bowl odds.

The Niners are our favorites right now, plus 450. Chiefs, second at plus 750. Baltimore is 9-1. Detroit is 12-1. Buffalo, 12-1. Your team's 15-1. I'll book those bets.

Yeah, I'll take those. Cincinnati is 15-1. Kind of like that one. Philly's 17-1. Miami, 20-1. Texans, 25-1. Packers. I was most surprised by this one, 17-1. Miami 20-1. Texans 25-1. Packers. I was most surprised by this one.

25-1 for the Packers. And then the Jets are 30-1. I've been thinking about this, Sal. I almost did a walk and talk on Instagram. I'll book your action here if you want. Yeah. Why wouldn't the Jets tomorrow just hire Belichick and get rid of Robert Sala

how are they not better with Bill Belichick than Robert Sala like in what world are you not better at that point how are you not better with Belichick

I just don't understand the Belichick stuff I just can't believe nobody's gonna hire him it's insane it's the dumbest thing I've ever seen he's not better

than Robert Sala Sala won more games seven kids Sala has he had eight wins in a season no no Zach Wilson we're fine he's a good backup this guy deserves to coach again

I don't want to get him fired but come on seven layers Sala how many Jet wins were there this year it's six of one really with these two guys they won seven games Belichick won four right let me ask you this Woody Johnson's an old guy right It's six of one, really, with these two guys. They won seven games. Belichick won four, right? Let me ask you this.

So, Woody Johnson's an old guy, right? You're at a point, like, if you're going to bet your life on this decision, it's like, all right, I'm year to year now. I'm getting up there in age. I need us to be good now. How do you have Robert Salah over Bill Belichick? Let's say one year you have to win. Nobody is taking Robert Salala over Bill Belichick? Let's say one year you have to win. Nobody is taking Robert Sala over Bill Belichick.

Or Mike Vrabel. That's the other one. Mike Vrabel is just sitting there now. Okay, Vrabel. He's in his mid-40s. He's not a better coach than Robert Sala? I'm with you. I don't know what the Jets' allegiance and everything else.

Maybe he feels bad about Woody Johnson feeding those seven mouths. He should get rid of all those people. They're terrible. Like they got Rogers. They have basically this window for next year. Anyway, 30 to one. If you told me they might actually make a coaching change, I think is.

Listen, there's one bet to make now. And if you're into IRAs or whatever, they're just, we say every year, bet the Chiefs. It was six to one. Last year when we did this podcast, they were 6-1. Now they're plus 750. All right, guys like Raheem cashed in because it was a rarity that they were 10-1 before the playoffs this year.

But the Chiefs are pretty damn safe to be around the third week in January. To have plus 750 on them is a good number. I wouldn't put the Niners up. Why do you put the Niners ahead of them? Why are they plus 450? Why are they almost half? Yeah, and the Niners, I would assume,

would start having some salary stuff this year, right? They have a lot of high-priced dudes. And they've missed a couple. They've missed on some people in the drafts. Yeah. I, so,

when Raheem really liked that 10-1 and we were texting about it, thank God nobody can see our text because it's just deranged people talking about the most obscure gambling things. Right. But my thing was like, I didn't feel like the 10-1.

I love the idea and it didn't feel like 10-1 was good enough value because we knew they had to win four playoff games. And even if they're going to be favored in the first game, they're going to be underdogs in at least two of them plus the the Buffalo game, which we knew was a coin flip and was going to be in Buffalo. So they were underdogs in that one too. I just feel like the odds are better to go game to game. As fun as it is to have 10 to one, I don't know if there's enough value on that. I think we have to figure it out. So there were no upsets, right? So they played everybody that

they should have played. They played the Bills, played the Dolphins, which we knew that was set, right? But Dolphins was, you could have bet that they were minus two and a half or the Dolphins were, I can't remember. That game was under a field goal and people were taking the Dolphins. Yeah. Let's say, okay, so a slight favorite,

basically a pick-em, a four and a half point underdog and a two and a half point underdog. If you money line all those, it probably is around 10 to one. I would say that's like 12 or 13 to one. Yeah, maybe it's higher. That's a parlay?

Maybe it's higher. Yeah. So I don't know. I think you're better off betting them straight up. But still fun to claim that as a shiny trophy. Like, hey, I called this. Kudos to Raheem. He was all over it.

Just like I'm over right now, the Golden State Warriors, as it make the playoffs, hit their over-under wins. I think the Warriors, in their last 10 games, I think they're number one in offense and number four in defense.

And all their fando odds are really low. Their plan's like minus 270, but to make the playoffs, they're still like plus 205. I think they could do it. Choking back a tear here because I feel like now we are, football is officially over

now that we're talking basketball. I know. I always forget how somber you are last Sunday. This day is really weird because I love it. It's like Mardi Gras. There's a million props.

And I just, I'm like, I need time in the morning and I'd go through all the props. And then it's like Mardi Gras. There's a million props. And I just, I'm like, I need time in the morning and I'd go through all the props. And then it's like, I'm at home. But the bad part is, football's ending.

The other bad part is, you'll get a text from somebody like you haven't talked to in a year. It's like, hey, I saw odds that Taylor is going to flash Donna Kelsey in the booth. I heard it was 20 to one.

I'm like, okay, all right, leave me alone. Like, no, can you get that down for him? I'm like, no, get the fuck away from me. I'm like, okay, all right, leave me alone. No, can you get that down for me? I'm like, no, get the fuck away from me. And then my wife will ask, oh, wow, the Niners came out first. It's interesting to know which team comes out first.

Do they usually win? I'm like, and I laughed that off. She's like, no, really, could you look that up? I'm like, I am not looking that up. I got a million things to do right now. So there's a ton of lunacy to deal with in the last day, but it is over. Yeah. Well, one of the crazy things about today is it really did feel like just about everybody was on the Chiefs. So I love the Chiefs coming out of the gate. And as every day went by,

especially as I was consuming all the content on the internet, including a lot of the stuff the ringer people were doing. And it was like, man, there are just too many people on the chiefs. It's usually doesn't work out this way, but yet the line was not moving. Right. The line was just steady minus two and a half. It moved down to two. It dropped to one and a half for a second.

Then by game time, it was two and a half again. You, you would think this was a, a chiefs team who was six years removed from their last super bowl. And like, maybe it's because they weren't the aggressive type that we remember. Maybe Mahomes' air yards go down,

and he doesn't have three-play touchdown drives like he used to. Even when they were up three, I think I texted, I don't know if I texted, they're only minus 150, and they're up three, and the momentum has shifted, and Kyle Shanahan's on the other side. The oddsmakers really didn't trust them, really, for the last month and probably even longer.

At halftime, I looked at Fando a couple times. It was somewhere between plus 205 and plus 220. And those seemed like great odds. They were getting the ball to start the half. They were only down seven. Yeah. And I was surprised those weren't a little lower. Or at least you could have... You knew there were going to be more points in the a little lower or at least you could have uh

you knew there were gonna be more points in the second half too so you could have teased that with the over something like that I'm with you man KC plus 750 is probably the bet

come on cause the bills are gonna be worse they have a bunch of salary cap cap stuff the the the division is better for KC

might be the only red flag figure the Raiders they have, they pick in the draft. They showed signs of life. Seems like they love Antonio Pierce. Chargers have Harbaugh. That might take a year because of their salary cap situation. Denver's in year two with Payton. Yeah, but what's the difference?

They won on the road. They proved they can win on the road. That was the one thing we didn't know, right? So, okay, even if they don't win a division, which they should, they'll get a wild card and they'll just do it that way. Well, do you think we hit the point where people just start to hate the Chiefs? Little Chiefs fatigue?

Are we here? Yeah, because it happened with the Pats that third Super Bowl when they beat the Eagles, the first three. And it was like, oh my God, they did it. And it was like the Black Sheep Patriots, oh my God, they won it. And it was like the Black Sheep Patriots. Oh my God, they won three in four years.

Brady, this is crazy. And I remember there was real, you could feel it. I could feel it in the emails I was getting when I was doing the mailbags. We were like, fuck these guys because the Red Sox had just won. And just like a switch at flip. Brady was too handsome.

He's dating Bridget Moynihan. People are just looking for Belichick. He's a dick. And everyone turned. But this is what happens when you keep winning. It happened to Duke. It happened to the Cowboys when they were winning 30 years ago when you were in college.

Oh, shut up. No, it was 29. No, it was 30. No, it was legitimately 30 years ago. I think it goes as far as the quarterback right so kelsey could date every he could date beyonce next and whatever it's not gonna matter if mahomes is likable and there was that minute during the regular season where he wasn't right then he went to shake hands with josh allen he was like fucking that was bullshit with the referees and everything it's like whoa all right we could see this but but I'm going to tell you something. I'm going to call him Kermit the goat.

He's the goat. This is why he could possibly pass Brady sooner than seven Super Bowls, because he has a lot more distractions, I think, and he puts them all to the side. It doesn't matter. All right. It's a great point. Watch the documentary.

The wife, think what you want. Great. Maybe a little bit of a distraction there. The brother, lunatic. Right? Doesn't let it bother him. The father, okay. Father had some issues this week. Yeah. Racking up some charges. Doesn't matter, man. Still has a great game. Taylor Swift

joins the team. The most famous person in the world. It's fine. Kermit the freaking goat. That's my guy. I like it. Yep. All right, before we get to Parent Corner, we didn't talk about the halftime show.

It felt very mid-2000s-ish to me. That was my review. That's my one blurb review. Our buddy Daniel said it felt like the Jimmy Kimmel Live Green Room playlist. In 2003. Yeah, that was good. I really liked that one.

A rare W for Daniel. I'm just kidding, Daniel. What do you mean, buddy? I've got a lot of good ones. He's got a ton. I think it was good. First of all, we were bored to death from the game, right? Up until that point. Usher, please take your shirt off.

Do something. And then our friend Hench brought up a good point. You got all these idiots on rollerblades and Dre Greenlaw is trying to walk onto the field and tears up his leg. Right. Like, what are we even watching here? But I thought it was good.

It was fine. Probably better to be there. What was your favorite commercial? I wasn't really paying attention too much, but I'll say Romo and Mr. T. I thought Mr. T shined. I'm going to give you mine. Go ahead.

I really liked the Arnold Schwarzenegger State Farm ad when he couldn't say neighbor. I just thought that was good. I really liked the Christopher Walken ad. I just thought that was funny. The Affleck Dunkin' Donuts ad, which seemed like it was going to be a disaster was great. I really enjoyed it.

Damon on the side. I liked the track suits. I really wanted Dunkin' track suit. Dunkin' won't sponsor my podcast. I've only been asking. They won't do it? 15 years. Yeah.

I don't know how many that, I'm not going to beg, but I don't, I mean, I've loved Dunkin' my whole life. Who was it? Dunkin' and Jimmy Johns, you said? They're the last holdouts? Yeah, that's it. That's it. Those are the two. Two of my favorites.

Everybody else has signed up at this point, but Duncan and Jimmy Johns. Duncan especially really hurts my feelings. Yeah, right. I think there's a very good chance we're going to be in Boston at the end of March for a couple rewatchable shows. Duncan doesn't care I'm going to be drinking Dunkin Donuts probably walking around, they don't care

why don't you do a rewatchables in a Dunkin Donuts and just put as many people as you can in there I'd wear one of the tracksuits for one of the shows I love it are they going to sell those tracksuits? I'm sure that's next I thought they were phenomenal.

The truth is, I got to say, I watched most of the commercials the next day because during the commercials, I'm just crossing off losing props. Oh my God, that lost this guy. Yeah, it's true. You're at work. All right. So the Chiefs can't score 19 points. I'm crossing that off.

Yeah. They ran two or three of those Jesus ads that get a really interesting reaction in the room. And then the Scientology, they had an ad. And then there was like a Mark Wahlberg religious app ad.

And then there was an RFK Jr. political ad. Those are the ones that got like, whoa, okay. They're like, hey, it's Yeah. They're like, hey, it's Sunday. You're going to church, whether you like it or not. Nobody loves those. Are people... Are the Jesus ads, I hate to say,

are they anyone's favorite ever? People don't care. It's a choice. Speaking of Jesus. It's a choice we're making. We're going to take a break and then do some Paracorner. Today's Paracorner is brought to you by CarMax. As any parent knows, there's always two things we can't get enough of.

Time and money. That's why CarMax is making it fast and easy to shop by your budget and get pre-qualified for your next car. And when I say fast, I mean fast. In the time it takes you to make a pot of coffee, you can get personalized items so you can start shopping their nationwide inventory to find a car within your monthly budget. And even better, pre-qualifying won't impact your credit score. Save time and start shopping for a car you love. Get pre-qualified today. CarMax, the way car buying should be. See details at carmax.com. All right, Sal, what do you got? All right. So I was in Vegas most of the week, so I didn't get to spend time with the kids, thank God. But one thing that happened Saturday, right as I was flying back, my son Harrison's baseball team had a fundraiser.

And if they raise X amount of money, they could go to Dodger Stadium and spend the day there and throw in the bullpen and take rounders in the infield. It's like a dream come true, right? If this happened to us at 10, if you went to Fenway, I mean, what would you do? You would just stare at the wall for hours, right? Oh, my for hours. Sitting in the seats at Fenway was a religious experience. Going on the field, I probably would have just blown up. Oh man. And the dugout, you get to see the clubhouse and all that stuff. It's like, oh my God, this is just craziness. And so Melissa sent me a video of him throwing in the bullpen. I was like, this is just insanity. And so I get home a couple hours after he gets home and he's trying to put on that thing. What's the thing you put on your face that

everyone's tripping over? The guy at the Celtic game in the front row. It starts with an O. The ocular? What is it? Oh, that thing? Yeah, yeah. Oculus. Yeah, Oculus. Sorry. Again, mid-fifth, whatever. I said, hey, how was it? I want to hear all about Dodgers today. He was like, oh, it was fine. I was like, what do you mean it was fine? He's like, well, we just threw in the bullpen.

We took ground balls and, you know, we hit the ball. We hit batting practice. We did home run derby. I'm like, oh, so were you, did they have a fence that they brought in or did you start like in the early in the outfield? He's like, no, no. We were like hitting them over the fence. I'm like, God, this is freaking great. Like, but didn't you have a great time? He's like, yeah, it was fine. I was like, no, no. We were hitting him over the fence. I'm like, God, this is freaking great. But didn't you have a great time? He's like, yeah, it was fine.

I was like, I'm done. What are we supposed to do here? You went to Dodger Stadium. It was a beautiful day in February, the sun shining. I don't know what to do with him. I want to put him in the car and drive him to a terrible neighborhood that I didn't grow up in and tell them, yeah, I lived in that burnt apartment building over there. I just, how do you scare these kids into thinking like, into appreciating anything? I don't know. I'm trying to, maybe that should have been a Superbowl ad. And instead of the second Jesus ad, that should have been an ad to scare kids into appreciating things more. Yeah.

We could be living in terrible weather right now on the Canadian border. Right. And you'd have no chance to do any of this stuff. If anyone has any suggestions, please hit us up on the X or wherever. Did you just say X instead of Twitter? You've made the conversion? Yeah. Well, I don't want to sound too old.

Yeah. I got two with my son. One is he comes home at night you know now he's doing he's starting to push it we talked about this before but it's like the 12 30 curfew and then you can tell at 12 30 he's not going but his new thing now is people have been coming back with him to sleep over like his buddies but he doesn't text us and be like, hey, so-and-so's over. And then the next day, my wife's going down to make coffee, and there's just some kid walking down the stairs.

He's like, hey, my name is... And we're like... If people are sleeping over, just text. It's really easy to just text us, hey, just a heads up. So-and-so is coming over. Which he just never does ever just anyway so he's been pushing

hard to come on my podcast to do UFC because all he cares about is UFC I'm never going to have him on the podcast they keep telling him this and I also don't think he realizes how hard it is to do a podcast so today we we taped a fake podcast

because I wanted him to see, oh, this isn't just shooting the shit. You have to be prepared. So I almost want to run it at the end of this. He's holding the mic, and he's thinking about what he's saying, and he's turning away from the mic, so the audio's not going into the mic.

I'm like, what's 298? What fight are you most excited about? And he says it. And then I'm like, what about number two? And he's like, well, I don't have the card in front of me. And I'm like, well, you're supposed to be an expert. You're supposed to be able to rattle off the cards. He's like, oh, I didn't realize that.

And we're just going through it. And we do like 10 minutes and it's bad. He had a couple good points but at the end i think he really had a new respect for what we did really yeah interesting he's like wow dad i mean he was like i was like stressed out that was really hard it's really hard to come up with stuff and and to remember everything and then have opinions like that's how do you do that every day? And then it started asking me. I was like,

wow, that worked. He actually put thought into what his dad does. That's great. That's what I need. 20 seconds. That's exactly what I need. Yeah.

That's terrific. And then he immediately went upstairs and I didn't see him again for like a while. I was just going to say, then he's like, hey dad,

I had three dudes sleep over. They also want to do a podcast with you. They'll be right there. Hey, there's three guys on the third floor right now. They're coming down. We're doing a-man pod.

So anyway, yeah. My son has no respect for what I do. Good. All right. I'm going to do a fake podcast with Harrison. Also, he may be taking the permit test tomorrow. What's a number of failing the permit test that would be a high number to you? My buddy.

My buddy. my middle kid's on three now. But I don't think it's fair. They do it a weird way, right? They don't tell you which ones you got wrong. And I don't know what... They don't tell you what you got wrong.

80, like 1% of the questions. So he came one short a couple times. Anyway, it's time number four this week. Oh, four's good. For the permit test. he's becoming the buffalo bills kyle shanahan of the uh permit test i don't know podcast yeah i don't know because this is our last pair corner for a while so uh i i nobody people will never know how we did um we'll be doing in three years and our kids still won't be driving. That'll be terrific. All I wanted when I was 16 was

I just want a car. I just want to get out of the house and go places. Pass the test. Same way. Anyway, that's it for Parent Corner. Today's Parent Corner was brought to you by CarMax. There's never enough time in the day, especially for parents. CarMax gets that. That's why they're making it fast and easy

to shop for your next car. At CarMax.com, you can get pre-qualified in as little as five minutes with no impact to your credit score, and you can shop a nationwide inventory with a personalized monthly budget. With all the time you'll save, maybe you can start planning that family road trip

or finally get a little you time, even if it's just for a little while. CarMax, the way car buying should be. See details at CarMax.com. Before we go, as you said earlier, this is the saddest night of the season. This is it.

The saddest night of the year. My wife felt the opposite. She was turning off the TVs for the pod and she turned around and did a double fist pump and said, football's over. It's over. And was celebrating. I don't know what she thinks.

We're going to be like apple picking next weekend or whatever. I'm just moving right to basketball. I got to say, it's like there's three. I don't know. It just kills me that it's over. And like being in Vegas, I think I made this day worse. Like, oh my God god what a triumphant

week for the ringer and Fandel and us and just everybody and the wise guys and by the way Vegas kicks my that's that's another sign of get you're getting old like for me like the three signs like oh shit I can't do the same workout I did when I was 35 like yeah oh crap I'm I'm not as uh vigorous a lover I used to last 90 seconds. Now, I'm not even close to that. Third is Vegas just beats the shit out of me after two and a half days now.

When I feel like, right, we could have stayed six, even 10, 15 years ago, we would have been able to do it. I would have thrown in a number four as neither of us could remember a famous number 58. Well, the word Oculus. 20 years ago, I could

have gone on any sports game show and crushed it. Now I'm like, who's number 58? Was there a number? Yeah, Vegas. I didn't end up going because I was on the road for like 10 days. We missed you. Just didn't want to do it

but then there was a text about who was playing craps you and JJ and Chang and Chang it was legendary at the Cosmo which is a fun place to gamble anyway and thank god everyone wanted to stay away from blackjack I know you're one of the guys you'll stay you'll play till 6 in the morning

you'll lift your feet while they vacuum but uh what's wrong with that I have no luck. What's wrong with that? Well, apparently you're winning, but then I feel like a dick after I go to the ATM for the third time. And you're like, you're leaving now? I was like, yeah, I'm going to get my teeth kicked in here.

I got kids to send to college. But craps was good. And Chang was just, for the first time I remember, he was playing for the player. He's usually the don't pass. I know you hate that I do that. I bet against buzzer beaters and everything. Chang is all don't pass.

Well, don't pass is just sacrilegious. I know, but you win. You're taking the table, Carmen. You're just, yeah, but you're just, I don't know. I don't like risking God. See, so Chang has this Netflix show now. It's on every Tuesday and he cooks a meal live with two guests.

It's on, I think like seven o'clock Pacific time. So like last week he had John Mulaney and Nick Kroll on. He comes on and he starts cooking and he's like, here's what I'm gonna make. And they make small talk and they go back and forth. And like part of it is like, Ken Chang basically host a video podcast with these guys

as he's making this incredible meal? To me, it was the wrong idea because the winner idea is just watching Chang gamble in Vegas. It's the same idea. He's not cooking. He's actually just playing craps with John Mulaney and Nick Kroll.

And he's putting bets on 40 things and just having a nervous breakdown every two minutes. I just think high ratings. Yeah. And he's putting bets on 40 things and just having a nervous breakdown every two minutes. I just think high ratings. Yeah. Or maybe he could bet on Nick Kroll to vomit after eating pasta puttanesca. I don't know. Maybe that's a way to do that.

But Chang, it's as excited I've seen a person get when he, I mean, he was thrown all, you talk about betting props. The middle of the craps board is all props, right? He bet the double sixes. 33 hard! Double sixes! Eight and up, it's a language, and those dealers, God bless them, there's chips being thrown at their heads,

they know exactly where to put them, and he's crazy the way he spreads it out. I think he had like a hundred, I don't want to, you know, he's going to have to be in trouble with the tax man, but he had like a hundred or 150 on double sixes, which is 33, 31 to one. And he,

he hit that JJ hit that. And he is still doing laps around that table. He was so excited. This should have been the live Netflix show. I know. Just a craps table with Chang and two celebrity guests. And then seven other people that he can bet against. And maybe he's also trying to make mac and cheese on the side as he's doing craps.

I like it. Yeah, he could do both. Yeah. Anyway, that was the one time I got super jealous and mad that I was there. Also, our cousin was there. He's there. I think he's just getting back now. Yeah, he was in the Las Vegas tourism booth right there.

It's one of his five hometowns that he claims. He's somehow from five places. Oh, come on. Does anyone have more hometowns? He's gleeful. When you're in a cab and he's passing this

and this is like, yeah, this is where I first did this and first did that. But yeah, he was happy. Aaron Moe was there. If Jimmy was a professional wrestler, there would be like seven cities where it's like, finally, he was happy. Aaron Mull was there. If Jimmy was a professional wrestler, there'd be like seven cities where it's like,

finally, I'm back at my hometown of St. Louis. Parts unknown. I'm getting a nasty text tomorrow. All right, Sal, that was our 17th year. It's always an emotional ending for us. You're still going to pop on every once in a while. We're going to do it next year too, right? We've already been renewed for year 18. Oh, that's terrific. Could be the last one.

No, why? This might be my final year. I really might be done. Because of fucking Dunkin' Donuts? No, it could just be us doing phone calls on Sunday nights like the old days. Yeah, maybe. Birmingham Stallions versus Arlington Renegades.

You want to guess the line? UFL? No. Are you going to do UFL? Could they... It piques my interest for a week and a half. Could they put together a league? I don't know. Sign a Terrell Owens or someone that makes it somewhat interesting for a month.

Well, it does seem like they could adopt the Larry David rule of just no kickers at all. Like, here's our wrinkle. There's no kickers. Everything is touchdowns and two points and going for it on fourth down, and that's it. Great. Just got to go. You can still listen to Sal

on Against All Odds. And Cousin Sal's. Are we still doing Cousin Sal's winning weekend on Fridays? We are, right? Of course we are. Cousin Sal's winning weekend. So now you got to just steer that toward NBA and Masters and March Madness we have coming. You get to pretend you know what's going on in men's college basketball. Oh, stop it. Yeah.

And I'm with Tate on Through the Ringer on Tuesdays. Lots of fun. Lots of stuff. Can I make it a college basketball announcement to you? Yeah. I think I care. I think I care more about the women's tournament this year than the men's. Really? Yeah. Okay. Caitlin Clark, South Carolina, LSU, Juju Watkins, who was in the same class with my

daughter and was so good as an elementary school kid. She wasn't allowed to play in the junior high games. That's how great she was. Her at USC, UConn. I think I'm actually more interested. I can't name all these kids on the men's side. They stay for a year and they're gone or they transfer or whatever. There's actually the continuity of women's hoops. I can't blame you too much. The USC,

especially with that, the Pac-12 women, Pac-12 men, there might be two teams in the 7th World Conference. Meanwhile, the Pac-12 men, there might be two teams in the sorry, the field of 68. Yeah, it's like the seventh worst conference, right? Meanwhile, the Pac-12 women, you might get 10 out of the 12. That's how good it is. Yeah, I'm going to

get on. I'm going to start watching a little more of women's college because I want to bet on a team and have a rooting interest in it. I can't believe it. I don't know what's happening. Women's college basketball, man. All right. What don't know what's happening. Women's college basketball, man. All right. What else?

Anything? Kaitlyn Clark. Kaitlyn Clark. Layup, free throw, or three-pointer Thursday to break the record. Well, so it's this record, but Lynette Woodward has the real record, but they didn't recognize the actual version of women's college basketball back then.

So there's like, she has to break two different records, basically. Right. Yeah. Well, I thought the NCAA would have fucked that up. I mean, they get everything right. Yeah. There is just a misstep. All right, Sal. Year 17. Just a great job by you.

And we'll be back. When's football again? Like September 10th? September 11th? September 12th? Somewhere in there. It's a long ass time. We'll be back. We have football again? Like September 10th? September 11th? September 12th? Somewhere in there. It's a long-ass time. We'll be back. We have a lot of futures.

Yeah. We're going to get to all of it. And we did the right thing because I made a big point of this on Cousin Sal's winning weekend. As long as the offseason is, it's like the NFL version of Groundhog comes out

and adds three months if you bet against Patrick Mahomes and lost. So we did the right thing. We passed the final exam. Good job by you, Simmons. Well, one thing that I hope we learned today if you're running the New England Patriots is it's always good to have a really good quarterback because they have that third pick.

Just take whatever quarterbacks left. You have to. I'm with you. You're never beating Patrick Mahomes or whoever unless you have somebody who can at least be close. All right, Sal. Good job by you. Good to see you.

I think they're going to draft Kaitlin Clark. That's my college football prediction. Oh my God. Well can at least be close. All right, Sal, good job by you. Good to see you. I think they're going to draft Caitlin Clark. That's my college football prediction. Oh, my God. Well, that'll be exciting. All right. Good job by you. All right, that's it for the podcast. Thanks to Cousin Sal.

Thanks to Steve Cerutti and Kyle Creighton as well. And don't forget, you can find all the videos and clips that we make from this podcast and my little walk and talks on youtube.com slash Bill Simmons. We also did new channels for Ringer NBA and Ringer NFL, so subscribe to those. I'm going to play you off with a Pearl Jam song that, until you turn this podcast on, you'd never heard before. Who knows? Maybe you'll be able to hear the whole thing this week. Take us off, Pearl Jam. Must be 21 plus and president select states. Fando is offering online sports wagering in Kansas under an agreement with Kansas Star Casino LLC. Gambling problem?

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