The Bobby Bones Show - Amy Opens Up About Motherhood + Marriage Escape Funds + Monday Morning Confessions

Episode Date: February 19, 2018

Amy gets real about the joys and difficulties of motherhood, Listeners admit to having marriage escape funds in case something goes south with their partner, Listeners share their Monday Morning Confessions Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Let's start off the week with, is it fake news? Is it fake news? And then there was one. A town in Wyoming is now down to one person after the family of five left for Philadelphia. So now there's one guy left. He's a geologist. And he says, look, it's awkward, but I love it here. I wish I still had some neighbors.

It's just him. Just him. Wow. And the town of Saratoga, Wyoming. Is it fake news? Now, I've heard of ghost towns where there's none. Oh. But that's mostly in cowboy movies.

But is there a town with one? I'm going to say it's fake news, Amy. I'm going real. This is awesome. All right. And it is? Fake news. That was fake.

What is the population there? I don't know. I don't know it's a real town. Oh. You made all that up? Yeah. He's a geonology. I'm clapping for him. No, it's all fake.

He's like, his name is Ross. He used to have friends. The Olberts, they moved to Philadelphia. He's better at doing fake than he is real. Of course, because he doesn't even stumble. I know. When he does the bonehead, he's like, you live my confidence. Because that's real news. Okay, I think now we have a way to, you know, gauge if it's real or fake.

Hey, oh, when he nails that. Hey, Saratoga is a real town in Wyoming, and it has a population of 1,600. There you get. Well, 1599 moves. Recognizing people doing cool things. It's ICU. Thanks to a Green Bay, Wisconsin police officer. A little birthday was a whole lot better. Officer Darrell Robinson was on call.

He was with the local elementary school when a student wasn't picked up at the end of the day. They're just standing there. Both the boy's parents were in jail. He didn't have any other emergency contacts. By the way, it was the kid's birthday. Oh. That makes me want to cry. So while the police searched for someone to take care of the boy,

the officer took him to McDonald's. Let him drive around in the car. Wow. They found some of the boys of the family. They dropped him off afterwards, but the cop just took him for a couple hours. Oh, that kid will never forget that. I know. So Officer Robinson.

I see you. He has like 11 jobs. He drives Uber. He does this job. Now he's taking bartending classes. Did you guys know this? Wow. Wow.

Just started. Yeah, so I kind of want to be a bartender. So a girl at one of the bars, she trains me every Saturday from 10 to noon. So I'm learning the drinks. Right now I'm a mixologist, boys. Well, you're making the easy drinks like Captain and Coke, and you're not making like the cosmopolitans and the dirty martinis. You're just at a bar where it's like liquor, Coke.

Wait, well, I go right to the negative. Right. Like, you're not, dude. No. No, I'm asking if he's going for a high class place or just like a bar just like where you're just. It's a college bar. Okay. What's the goal?

Probably on a Saturday night pick up a shift, do some bartending. I know people that make sense. six figures they do bartending. They'll have their Monday through Friday job. I'm dead serious. CEOs of companies. And I, you know CEOs of companies that bartend on Saturday and they make six figures. Yes. That's not true.

I'm dead serious. That's a lie. That's 52 Saturdays. Because you meet, you become social, you meet so many people, it's so great for your personality. Name one. One. One. One. And name, yeah. One CEO that's bartending on Saturday. Bobby, do the math. How many, how much is that on a Saturday night? There's only

52's houry nights. No, but that's on the point he's saying that you meet people and then they hire you a CEO. And it helps your personality. I thought he was saying CEOs like as a side job. No, I don't think Michael Dell's out there going, what do you have? You want a corona? Okay, Ray. Well, anyways, yeah.

I'm just starting with the breakfast drinks right now. So the mimosa, screwdrivers, your bloody marries. Oh, my. The Bachelorette parties would love Ray. I bet you could get lots of tips because you're really personal and fun. Why are you doing it just for extra cash? or to be a CEO. Like, do you want to run Target?

I kind of like side jobs. Yeah. Yeah, and to make that six figures only working Saturdays, we're looking about $1,900 in a night and tips. There you go. You do that, yeah. I know a lot of people who will get that. I will say this about you, right?

A lot of other people in the show aren't motivated. They say they're motivated and they're not. You don't say you are, and you just go do things. Yeah. Nobody works, just grinds. Like, well, I say nobody. I'm talking to Eddie. They don't grind like you do, and they're always talking about it.

Oh, really? Are you talking about me? No. Yeah, there's a lot of people in the show that don't grind. No, Ray does, though. Yeah, you'll see me slinging drinks. Yeah. Throwing them up, bottles up, flipping them.

Let us know your first shift will come out, right? Cocktail. So here's the story. A series of lottery numbers came to a woman while she was sleeping. And she told her husband, and he goes, I'm playing them. Then he played them at $100,000. Oh, my goodness. He never plays the lotto.

But he did it specifically because she was like, go play the lotto. And she was like, no, I had a dream about these numbers. And he was like, well, let's go play him in the lottery. And he did. And they won $100,000. Isn't that crazy? I mean, probably crazy random coincidence. Like super crazy random coincidence.

Still, that's nutty. Sierra and Georgia. Good morning. Good morning, Bobby. Hey, Amy. I love you guys so much. Thank you. Did you dream something?

I did. I actually dreamed that I had a boy before I was actually pregnant. So, like, a few weeks later, I had a dream, and then, like, a few weeks later, I found out I was pregnant, and I didn't tell anybody about the dream. This is actually my first time ever saying anything. My boyfriend, no one even knows. So, yeah. Wait, they don't know you're pregnant or they don't know you had a dream? He didn't know how to dream.

Okay. Okay, okay, all right, go ahead. Oh, yeah, I have a one-year-old now. Oh, okay, okay, so he's out there. So you had a dream before you even knew you were pregnant? Yes. No, I actually found out that a few years. weeks later after I had a dream, I found out I was pregnant. And I was so excited. I'm like,

oh my God, if I found out I'm having a boy, I'm going to be so freaked. And that is what happened. I had a boy. Do you think like your body was like knowing you were pregnant and so you had a dream? Like, how do you feel about that? Do you think like it was some kind of... Well, I was kind of thinking the same thing. I was like, oh, I'm not sure. Like, I don't know. I was just really freak when I found out I was having a boy and I was excited at the same time. So, Well, that's cool. I appreciate you. Clayton in Texas. Well, Clayton.

Hey, how's going, Bobby? Hey, dude, so you had a dream? What happened? Hey, so Chad's story first to start it off. March 11th, our house burnt down. Everybody got out safe, so that was a great thing. We had lost a cat. And the cat had, we've been looking for it for a few days. And I was laying in bed and just passed out. And I saw this cat walk across the street right down the road.

from my house. Well, we kept looking for the cat for a couple more days, and lo and behold, we went right down the road about 9 o'clock at night, and that cat was sitting on the left side of the road and walked right across to the right side of the road, just like I saw on my dream, man. It was one of the craziest things I've ever experienced, to be honest. So you dreamed, and then you went and found the cat in the same spot? Yeah, we actually weren't able to get the cat back because it was a very wooded area, and he, I guess it had scared him so much that he just wanted to live outside. after that, but it was the exact same spot, man.

It was right by my uncle's house about a block and a half down from the house. Wow. That's weird. Wow, wow. I appreciate you. Oh, man. Cindy in Oklahoma. Hey, Cindy, how are you?

I'm great, Bobby. I'm so excited to talk to you. Thank you very much. Where are you in Oklahoma? I am in Canton, Oklahoma, actually. Oh, Bali Canton. That's my favorite one. Yeah, it is.

Okay, so tell me your dream story. Okay, so I had a dream that my friend, my very, very best friend, was in a car accident and she died in my dream. But the good thing was, she was in a car accident the very next day, but she didn't die in it, but she did get hurt. But she's okay now, and I never told her about my dream because that was kind of crazy. You dreamed she was an accident and then she had an accident? Yes. we've been best friends since the eighth grade do you believe that was some sort of like psychic

like some sort of premonition or do you think it was random no I believe in all that good stuff you do yeah then why wouldn't you tell her then well because she was kind of not very happy after the wreck and so it was just not a good thing no before the wreck like if you believe in that like if I have a dream like Amy don't go walking on ice

because you don't bust your head, I'd dream. I'd be like, Amy, I'd dream, you walk in the ice and bust your head. Don't go bust your head. I mean, in this situation, like, her friend could basically never get in a car again. Right.

I don't know what you guys talking about at this point. But, hey, I appreciate you. It's getting a little too sad for me right now, so I'll play a song. I wanted, like, I dream to met my husband, his name was Jim. And then, you know who I met the next day? Jim.

Instead, I got a cat that never returned an accident. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. All right, Monday morning, positivity. Time for Tell Me Something Good. Let's go. Tell me something good. So, Lupe learned CPR 30 years ago.

Never used it. Works for the Fort Worth Independent School District. She was the front desk when a co-worker's wife rushed in with her baby girl. 11-month-old. Stop breathing. Boom. CPR. 30 years remembered it.

Save the baby. Call 911. The pair of men that got there like the baby was saved. Wow. Like had she not went back 30 years and remembered it. And baby CPR. 11 months old? Baby C.

It is different. It is so delicate. So, yeah, man, that's crazy. Amy, you're up. Well, a cop came across two goats and was like, what are these goats doing out? They were cute little miniature ones. So he loaded them up in his cop car and drove around with them while his unit put up a Facebook post to find the owners. Pictures loaded around, boom.

Cop delivered the owners back to a little kid who lost his goats. No, I can't probably crying. Oh, man. Lunchbox. Officer Ed wanted to do something to cheer up the community. So he started a program called Compassion in his pocket where he carries a. around gift cards and when he sees someone that he thinks down on their luck, he just gives him a gift card to like dominoes or wherever the local store.

Compassion in your pocket. Officer Ed, props to you. Why a little fucks throw his paper in your ear? He like finishes the story and drops the mic except throws his story in the air. I'll play a song from the very beginning of the song. You have to sing the first line. Oh, yeah. So the music will stop right as the song starts, but you have to pick up from where it stops.

And I'm just going in order of the sheet. We'll give all three you guys, Amy, Lunchbox, and our producer Eddie, a couple shots. Are you ready, Amy? Ready. Sam Hunt, take your time. Okay? I used to drive out of your house and how many words. I don't know if you were looking at me or not.

It's the right idea. Close, close, close, close, goes. So, no. Lunchbox. Yeah, I'm ready. Pondoon from Little Big Town. We're going out on. The water.

Back this hitch up into the water. Oh my gosh. It was not close at all. I got water. Because a couple of my friends wrote that song. The first lyric is back this hitch up into the water, but that wasn't how they wrote it originally. Hitch wasn't the word.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think it's in the bobby cast, isn't it? What is? Oh, don't figure it out. Eddie. Yeah, come on. Here you go. Come on.

Derek Spintley drunk on a plane. I had two tickets on the way. to Cancun. I took two weeks vacation for the honeymoon. I thought it was like... Nobody got one right. Let's go back around one other time.

Come on. Amy. Yeah. Albury wine. I love this song. We were thirsty for knowledge. Oh, yeah. Through college.

Take it! Is that the next verse? And he... My grandpa's farm. I thought he had a car. Listen, here's an... Oh, well, the next line was. I was thirsting for knowledge.

Yeah. And he had a car. That's right. Yeah. Lunchbox, you don't know anything. I know that song. Bring it on. I know that song. You did not know that.

He didn't know that song. You're right. Lunchbox, you ready? I'm ready. Okay. Low cash. I love this life. Okay.

Oh, man. I'm going outside tonight. I love my boots broken. Are we just guys? No, I won the game last time. For sake of the game. Yeah. Do we keep him in?

I won. Yeah, we all are in. But he just yells words. I won the game last time. He's never close. Okay. Eddie, ready? Yeah.

Eddie, you can win this? It's the last one. But don't because it's fun. But it's the last one. No, no, no. Somebody has to win it, Amy. One more time. Please win.

Come on. Oh, you had Dina Carter. Stop. Yeah, yeah. What's in college? Barefoot Blue Gene Knight. I got it. Eddie stood up.

Taking my shoes off. He's taking their shoes off. All right, here you go. Full moon shining bright. Full moon shining bright. That's good. Me the winner. There he is.

Easiest one on the sheet. Amy, no. You had Dina Carter's strawberry wine. Yeah, but I knew. Well, Amy, Amy, my song was playing. Hit me with one more. Come on. There are no more.

I just said that. Amy, my song was playing. I'm sorry, dance. Aye, aye, aye. Arriva. Oh, my goodness. Bobby Bones show. Bonehead.

Norrie of the day. This story comes to us from Florida. A man had his iPhone stolen, reported it to police. So police were like, hmm, how can we get this thief? They hit face. time and the thief answers the FaceTime.

Uh-oh, not good, not good. And so they snapped his photo and they posted it on the Facebook page and said, do you know this guy? He stole an iPhone and he was turned in. That's funny. You know, they were scrambling. Make that screenshot too. Like, oh, no, no, no. Yeah, that's funny.

Oh, on Lunchbox, that's your Bonehead story of the day. Come on Bobby Bone's show. All right, where did you get trapped? And I asked that because there's a guy, he's working on an ATM. The thing shuts on him and he's trapped inside the ATM. him. And so people will come up and he passes out through the receipt hole notes. They're like, help me. Help me. You're trying to get cash and then you're like, what? And they're screaming in here. So where have you been trapped? Hey, Timmy! What's happening, buddy?

What's going on? Tell me where you were trapped? Well, I was working on my car. I was like 18 and it was like 12 years ago. And I was working on my car and I had it jacked up and where I had it jacked up it was it was real soft and the jack fell and the car come down and pin me under the car and my cousin and i couldn't i was in the in the in the dirt it wasn't a concrete or asphalt but i couldn't get my shoulders around to like dig out from under myself so i could get out because my shoulders were pinned back but my cousin came by and she jacked the car up and i was able to get out from under it and that was about two hours dude you're lucky you're not dead yeah Wow.

Damn it. That's crazy. Yeah. Yes, sir. Do you ever dream about that? Because that's a traumatic experience. Yes, sir. Yeah.

Ooh, man. Jerry Clower, you say, who... Once at work, I got trapped in the storage closet where all the prizes are for two hours. I went in and the door shut and I was like, I couldn't get out and the doors were really thick wood and I was banging. Nobody could hear me. The back of the building. And luckily, I get to work hours early.

And finally, when everybody else showed, I was. up there like where's bobby and i was like helmet and finally someone was like what's that noise it was me stuck in the equipment closet yeah i was stuck in there with like all the free cedies and coosies it was like prize galore all right amy where were you trapped in an elevator yeah when i was coming to work once but i got out i wasn't like trapped forever no one had to rescue me but i did have to press the button and like it calls someone remember i brought in audio that's a thing that's a thing It's almost like calling 911 even if you need it It still feels weird

Yeah, because you're in the elevator And then they're like, hello And it was so, I was on my way to work And it was so early in the morning I feel like it had been transferred to someone Who was working from home Like you know how calls get transferred To maybe someone that's at home

And they're like, hello I'm trapped in an elevator They're like, Kenneth, why are you calling you this hour? No, no, no, it's not Kenneth, it's Amy on I'm in an elevator Yes, help me Okay, hey Brittany Hey, good morning guys Talking about getting trapped, what you think?

Yeah, so my husband and I moved into a new apartment complex that has a gated parking deck. So I drive into the parking deck and my husband's outside bringing in groceries and I park my car on the eighth floor and I get out and I cannot find the exit anywhere. Like to get out of the parking deck or to get into the apartment, I can't find any doors anywhere. So I'm walking up and down and I look out over and I see my husband walking on the sidewalk. so I yell out to him, can you help me? I'm stuck in this parking deck, and he just looks up and starts laughing. He doesn't even try and help me for at least 15 minutes. And how did you get out?

He finally found the door, but I was just stuck walking up and down this parking deck, trying to find an exit, and I couldn't get out. That's Seinfeld episode where they can't find the car, and they're just walking the door. Hey, thank you, Brittany. I appreciate you for calling. We appreciate you. Yeah, thank you very much. Brittany and Richmond, Virginia.

Let me do another one. Hey, Lauren and Iowa City. And Lauren, let me tell you about Iowa. I love it. I went to, I only been one time. That's one of my favorite places. I love it. It was amazing.

Anyway, enough about me. How about you? So I got stuck in a walk-in freezer at work at Kinnick Stadium, the football stadium in Iowa City. I was catering there. We were doing like catering for the suite. upstairs and I went down to go get something from the freezer and it's sealed. It's like that Brady Bunch episode where they get stuck in the meat locker, the freezer. So wait, did you worry you were going to die?

Yeah, you know, that like flight or, you know, fight thing, I definitely like went into, like, I'm going to, this is it. Like, I'm going to die here. I kind of just, like, gave up. It had been kind of a while and I had my phone, but my phone. my boss upstairs wasn't answering, so I just assumed that this was how I was going to go. You couldn't call anybody else? Yeah, like in retrospect, I could have called anybody in the world.

That's what my thought was. Okay, the boss didn't answer. I call anybody. I just hit numbers. Maybe the elevator guy from Amy's elevator answered. Kenneth what? No, no, no. I'm trapped in the ice machine.

Thank you for your call. Hey, Lauren, appreciate you. Appreciate you. All right. So I'm going to tell you a story. and then we're going to do I felt stupid win okay blank

so I was at the gym on Saturday and I was feeling a little down because I have whatever little illness this is and I wasn't really feeling like I was pumped I was going as hard as I normally do and I was on the treadmill

and he had me doing bare crawls on the treadmill which means you're on the treadmill as it's going and he went up and up and up and all of a sudden I couldn't do it anymore and so I just turned I just jumped fell in the fetal position and got shot off the treadmill in front of everybody for I flew three feet because I was on like five and I was going

you're like that Taylor Swift commercial yes I was and so instead I just turned over on my shoulder brace my head and it shoot shot me off the treadmill and everybody looked and kind of laughed at me so I felt pretty stupid I felt stupid when now if you'd like to call and share one of those I'd love for you too And if nobody does I'll just feel stupid alone as usual That happened though I didn't get injured

I'm sore Thank goodness I landed on my shoulder Oh I brace for impact Pretty solid I cover my head But it's a ptium And everybody looked and laughed

I was on the treadmill And I slipped And I got thrown off the treadmill And I felt stupid Tiffany in Ohio What'd you do? I was coaching a cheer clinic And I hopped up on to the stage

to show the girls some of my some of the emotions for the choreography that we were doing. And they had their papers scattered across the stage. And I took a step back and went flying off of the stage, fell off in front of the entire school, basketball team, cheerleaders, parents, coaches, broke my wrist. And all of the girls, the cheerleaders, had to carry me, help carry me through the car.

Oh, no. So you slipped on paper. I did. Oh. That's a real thing. Oh, no. It was awful. And I never broken a bone until I was an adult.

Dang. Welcome to adulthood. Dang, Tiffany. Thank you for the call. Appreciate you. Hey, Sarah in Kansas. Yes. You're on the air.

Go ahead. I was running late and I felt up the stairs. I thought I was by myself, but I turned around and the owner of our company was there. You fell up the stairs? Yeah, like I trip, like my foot slipped And I fell kind of up the stairs And it turned around And there was the comfort

Our boss Maybe they see you as more human now That's how I look at it And I mess up people go Oh, he's more human He's not perfect as everybody said Because everybody's he knows Nobody says that?

No All right, right Hey, you're on the air Hello, what's happening? Hello, I just had one of the I full stupid stories for Bobby Yeah, go ahead It's Bobby right now

How are you? Hi, I'm good, thank you. How are you? I'm good. Thank you for calling. Sherry's throw with me. Well, this I'm going to know, Bobby felt great because it's another treadmill story, but I was on a treadmill at the gym next to my son, who's an athletic teenager, and I was trying to be cool. And I couldn't figure out why he was going faster than me, so I lean over where I'm running to look and see what his was set on, and I hit the edge and shot off the back. Oh, man, that stinks. I'm calling it pretended like he didn't know me.

Oh, no. He just ignored it. Oh. He looked back and I wasn't hurt But he looked back and laughed And just kept running That stinks and it's funny And I appreciate you

I appreciate you guys too You make you laugh every morning Thank you very much Laura last one in Houston Go ahead I fell down some stairs While playing Pokemon Go Oh no you were looking at your phone

Yep it was dark And you were playing Pokemon Go The double Yes Man and so are you okay Yeah, it was like two years ago Okay, good Because yesterday I've been like

You're still playing Pokemon Go? But I appreciate you You know Amy, you have one I was trying to think of one And probably the most recent thing That happened to me Was that yoga

We were supposed to like Say what we were grateful for But I missed the part Where the teacher said Say it quietly to yourself Oh no Oh no You said it out loud

And I said it out loud So they're like Say it quiet So do you go I'm grateful for You know what the Lord's giving Me all my life But instead you went

I am grateful Yeah I was like Grable for family And everyone else is like I mean luckily Every's eyes are closed I don't even know if they knew I said it Oh they knew yeah yeah

Let me say I'm looking at the phones I'm shocked at how many people have an escape fund Oh okay yeah An escape fund Is you put a little money to the side Just in case you have to escape your marriage Oh She said the woman who I read the story about

That she was perfectly happy But that every woman should have one just in case Now I take it and go broader than women Yeah I mean do you think she's speaking to women that aren't working So then has it have to be more shady Because they're putting us They're having to like sneak money into a fund No she says

One of her friends said hey Just put away X amount a month Into your escape fund And so she started doing it and she's happy and Sounds hopeful like Yeah Yeah. Let's go over to Cody first.

Marriage is great, but. Cody and Alabama. Hi, Cody. What's going on, Bobby? What do you think about this, buddy? I actually had one. I had one and had to use it. Hmm.

I didn't put it in there with oats of a divorce, but I just put, you know, some rainy day money away on the side and wind up having to use it for a divorce. It rained. Yeah, it rained off. Yeah. Hard. And that rain took away half of stuff.

Oh. Not really. Amy. Yeah. Do you have car insurance? I do. Don't even talk. This is like a pre-knuck.

No, can I just say something without you yelling at me? Yeah. If I can have the talking stick for a second? Okay. Yeah, you can. It's your show. It's our show. Okay.

Okay. But. Okay, boss. If you say, why would you do that? You don't want it to happen. Mm-hmm. Same thing with having car insurance. Life insurance.

Just in case, you don't want to have a car wreck. But if you do, isn't it nice to be covered? Yeah, for that rain day. You don't want to die. Yeah. But just in case you do, isn't it good that somebody else is covered? That's all I'm saying. Kelly and North Dakota, you're on the air.

Hey. Thank you for calling. What do you think about this escape fund? I think that every person should have a little bit of something set aside for them. And if they needed as an escape fund, then yeah, that's what it is. Question. Okay, go ahead, yes? Man, this is sick.

It's your show. Go ahead. Talk. Okay. Does the other person know about this fund or is it open? Because a pre-nup, you both know about it. It's been signed. You're all in the know.

But if you're just kind of- My husband knows. Oh, okay. So does he- Because he is, he's a sole provider. Like, I work part-time. Wait, hold on. Wait, hold on.

Wait, what? He's a sole provider and he's okay with you taking some of the money in case one day y'all don't work on. I work part-time. Oh, okay. And so I, whenever I, Whenever I have, I do interior painting on the side. So when I have a big job, I put $100 away.

And he knows that randomly I just take a little bit of my money and I just put it away. But he knows it's for that, not for clothes. Before we were married, he knew it was for that. We bought a boat with some of it. There you go. And I put it away. Yeah. And I agree with Cody.

It's like a rainy day fund. And if that rainy day happens to be an escape, then it has to be an escape. Okay. You can call it rainy day funds. Right. It could be for any kind of rainy day. Because one of my friends just texted me who got divorced recently and goes, hey, yo, skate funds aren't legal. I tried.

Oh, really? Yeah, you can't call it that. It's got to be a different account. And you can't even hide money. Yeah, that's why I'm like people, as long as you know about it doesn't make it more okay. Page. I'm going to go with a strong no. In my opinion, you should take whatever money that you're feeling you need to save on the side in case of a divorce.

and buy some counseling for your marriage. That's right. What if it's over? Like what if the counseling is done and you've exhausted it? Okay, then you cannot call it an escape fund. I see what you're saying. Okay, piggy bank. We'll call it piggy bank.

Okay, but if you're just putting money aside in case any crappy thing happens in your life and you just so happen to use it for that, I'm okay with it. But setting aside money strictly for it, just in case my husband decides to leave me, I'm not okay with. Okay, and I appreciate your opinion.

I, you know, I'm not. Wait, hold on. If he's the one that's causing the leaving, then, yeah, it might be good to have a little extra money. Oh, a little hot sauce over there. I don't know. Salza. I can't decide. I guess if you both know about it, it just seems so not like hopeful in the right direction.

I guess I'm just a southern Louisiana Baptist. No, I feel you. I'm with you. She agrees with you. I do agree with you. I'm just also, sometimes it seems like, oh, what if you never, I mean, some people are in some really hard situations where they might need a little escape fund. So I don't want to totally blanket hate it. Don't blanket hate it.

Hey, Paige, I appreciate you. Thank you. Thank you. See you later. Hey, let me do another one. Hey, Heather and Austin, what do you think about having an escape fund in a marriage? I had an escape fund. I had a secret account.

My husband started turning really mean, and so I started putting money aside and plans to leave them. And I did it, and I've exhausted all of those funds. So you would recommend what? You know, you should always have money set aside because you never know who you marry until you really divorce them. Dang. You never know who you marry until you divorce them. And then the true side comes out.

I just went to her one year long battle with my ex-husband, and it's finally over, but it was expensive. That just tells me this, Heather, as I'm listening to you, I go. I feel like Heather knows. She's been through. It's hard for me to go to somebody and take advice if they haven't screwed up a lot in what I'm asking about. So it would be hard for me to go to a priest and talk about marriage because he's never been married. Oh. So that being said, I feel like someone like Heather who's been through the ring and a divorce, maybe when I find the person I'm going to marry, I divorce them.

See how that's going. And if I really feel good about it, get remarried again, like that's the test. Because you'll never know unless you divorce them. Because I'll never know who I'm married until I divorce them. That's a good philosophy. Dang. I'm kidding a little bit, Heather, but thank you for your story. I appreciate that.

And you kept money. You're welcome. All right. I appreciate you. I have so many calls to say they do this that I don't even want to put anybody else on because I'll go to court and play this tape back. And I don't want to be part of any lawsuit, frankly. So there we have it. A lot of people are doing it.

Yeah. I think if there's like concern of safety or something, it's a little bit different. But just overall, like life is great. but I'm good with always regardless, not even relationship. But you would also be good. And if she wants to have one, great. I have no problem with that. I don't think I should get anything that she doesn't or she gets anything I don't.

But if she wanted to do it great. That's fair. Yeah. You probably need an escape fund from me. You probably need a tunnel out of the bottom of the house. I have one. I have one. Everybody has one in here.

It's my bobby escape. I pay Amy's escape fund too. That was part of our deal. I'll fund your escape fund. Yeah, yeah. How would you feel about me, not if, but when I get a pre-up? What do you mean feel about you? I'm not going to judge you for it.

How would you feel? I'd feel like, wow, I really want to see you trust someone someday. And I feel like, I feel like if you ever do decide to get married, that person has had the ultimate trust that none of us have ever experienced. So I would like to see you just fully just go all the way, you know? But it is all the way. Like, we're never getting divorced, so it's not going to matter. Listen to you. You're never going to divorce.

It's not going to matter. But it's never going to matter. It's never going to matter. That's another car sideswise me and I'm not paying attention. Yeah. Life. So confused. But I feel like Bobby's marriage is going to be more like, okay, look, I'm going to live here.

You live there. We're going to eat at this time. We're going to be done at this time. I'm going to have this bank count. You have that bank account. Basically, we're going to live separate lives. We're going to be married. It's a sign here.

Give me a kiss. She's not going to be judgmental. That's it. Yeah, she's not going to judge. The Bobby Bones show. Bobby Bones. Walmart had to refund somebody who bought an iPad,

but when they got home and they opened the box, the box was full of flour. Wow. You know how people still stuff and then replace the boxes? That's great. Yeah, Walmart refunded the money.

She said she bought an iPad and then what she got in there is full of flower. Can you imagine you get home being so excited? Because I know it's like, you open that box. You know, you open that box.

Like, oh, my innocence's time. And then you probably go, they're not going to believe me. Yeah, there's no way. Like, there's no way they're going to believe me. And so she says it looks like someone cut in the packaging. And Walmart gave it with the $400. And they say, if this happens to you, as a general, let them know immediately. Okay.

Because. Don't doubt. Don't think they're going to doubt you. Just go for it. Just go for it. Yeah. That one person, remember not so long ago, they bought that big old vacuum from Target and they opened it up and it was like trash and

it was all just garbage. Yeah garbage like just filled with stuff. So someone's going into the store and stealing it and then replacing it or are they taking it home and bringing it back? I think they're taking it home filling it up or taking it to their cart filling it up and then taping it back up and returning it right? I would say you steal it at the store. I would too because I would think when you bring it back and they look inside of it. Yeah, when I worked at the store you would always look in the box when someone returned something. How do you walk out with a vacuum? How do you steal anything?

People are good. Okay. There was a baby. that weighs 62 pounds, right? It's 10 months old. Oh, wow. It's a 62-pound baby. That's a big baby. Right, and they can't stop the baby from getting fatter. Whoa. Oh, no.

And so, doctors are like, they don't know why he continues to put on weight. Has he been exposed to mold toxins. You know, stop with this mold toxins. I'm serious. It's a thing. I watch a documentary. At birth, he weighed 7.7 pounds. At two months of age, he weighed 22 pounds. That's a big jump. Is it? Because I don't know much about it.

Yes. It's a huge jump. Like, my son's seven. He doesn't even weigh that. 20 to weigh you like 22 pounds? Sure he does. Oh, I hope he doesn't. Oh, yeah, he does. For sure.

Then over the next eight months, he gained a staggering 39 pounds. So at 10 months old, he weighs 62 pounds. I wonder what that is. That is crazy. They're trading them for, like, some sort of childhood diabetes. Wow. Now? But I don't know.

Like when a baby's, how big were your babies, Eddie? Born at one was 7, 5 or something, and the other one was almost 8. So they were around the high sevens. And normal is that? Yeah, pretty normal. Do you see the guy, he went into a liquor store, and he was like, give me all your money. And they took, and the person working the counter took a bottle of Baileys and busted it over their head. No.

Oh, man. Yeah. I was at the register here, and I was counting it down. And a guy walked in, he had on a hat and sunglasses, and he said, give me the money. I didn't think much of it. And I kept counting the money down. and he came closer and he came at the register and he was like, no, give it to me. He was pulling on the register that way and she was pulling on it this way.

And I just grabbed a bottle of Bailey's Pumpkin Spice. And I looked at Sarah and she just said, hit him. So I hit him over the head with it. And he just stopped and he backed up and he turned around and walked out the door. Oh, I wouldn't be afraid to hit him again, though. Wow. It sounded like a plug. Yeah, there's good job by Sarah.

I got like Bailey's Pumpkin Spice. Oh, like $7.99. I mean, places. Seasonal. Let's go. Bobby Bones. Bobby Bones show. Amy's been laughing in herself over there.

It's now time for the Morning Corny, which she's built up in the room. Here we go. The Morning Corny! How did DEA agents start all of their jokes? How do DEA agents start all of their jokes? Nark-knark. That's very nice. funny.

I know. That was the morning corny. That's very funny. Yeah, that makes. I will give you the baby. You give me the country star. Oh, okay. See how many as you can name.

Memphis. Jason Aldeen. Correct. Where the lights come on. Everybody screaming. It's in the sky. All of Pearl. That's the baby.

Olive Pearl. Oh. Oh, Pearl. Jake Owen. Correct. I have no idea her real name, but her first name was Olive. Interesting. It's Pearl, dude.

Got it. It calls her, dude. Tennessee. Who has a baby named Tennessee. Really? Tennessee Hawkins is the whole first and middle name. Oh, oh, oh, Brad Paisley. No, I'm sorry.

You're thinking a Huck. Oh. You're thinking of Huck. Oh, is it Huck? I thought it was Hawk. Okay. No. Tennessee Hawkins.

Mm, nothing? No. Eric Church. You can catch me. I did know that. Of course. He would have a cool name like that. I'll give you a couple kids from this artist.

Audrey, Gracie, Maggie. Whose kids? Audrey, Gracie, Maggie. Audrey, Gracie, Maggie. Three kids. Audrey, Gracie, Maggie. Elvis. No.

Tim and Faith. How you talk to Oklahoma Close Yeah, close Sunday Rose Keith Irvin That's

Daddy girl I'm telling you You don't need that guy Okay Whose baby is Isaiah Michael Isaiah Michael? Isaiah

Give me a hint It's country artist I know that part I mean Young Young. I see. Maybe a year old.

Maybe my age, a year older than me? No, no, maybe a year old. The baby's year. I wanted a hint for the country artist. Her name rhymes with Rory Romerwood. Oh, Carrie Underwood. There is. She can hear those shit.

Amy takes the hint letterly and goes, oh, Carrie Underwood, yeah, yeah. Duh. I think you did okay at baby names. I did not that great, yeah. Doesn't you even recognize you with your kids? Yeah. Since you're the white mom with the two black children, are they like, oh, you're Amy? Yeah, it's pretty hard to end their accents.

They're like, hmm. Sometimes they even say, okay, are, are you, are you, you know, they put the pieces together with the accent and the, yeah, we look different. How's the English coming? Good. Better? I mean, since they're immersed in it now, do you feel it coming on seven and ten years old, catching it? Yes. Yes.

Yes, you heard in the video, even my son saying, what up, Bobby? Like, right away. And then my daughter now, I think she's starting to like more of the English to where she'll tell me more of what my son is saying. Like, last night he was being a little feisty and saying something in Creole that I knew was. And I used to ask her, what is he saying? And she would kind of hold back. And now she loves to tell me in English what he's saying. Riding him out?

Yeah. I'm like, yes, that's my girl. Here's something weird. Morgan number two, who'll bring the web to you. You know, she's our web girl over there. I like that. She has this weird thing about her neck. Does anyone know this?

No. Where she has this fear and she doesn't like, you don't touch her neck because she thinks she's going to, someone's going to stab her or she's going to die for her neck. Yeah, I have this super like irrational fear. Like, I think I'm going to die from choking or, like, if anybody even comes near my neck, I, like, want to punch them in throat. Like, I just don't even want you near my throat. So your boyfriend doesn't, he's not allowed by your neck.

No, if I really start to trust you, I can like ease into it, but it takes a lot for me to get there. If I get needles or like if I'm ever at a doctor, I'm like sitting there holding my neck because I'm afraid something's going to happen. What happened in your life to make you think your neck was vulnerable? Nothing. Like nothing has ever happened to me that I would have a problem with my neck. What about during birth? Do you know if anything crazy happened to your neck during birth like your umbilical cord was wrapped around your neck? What's happening?

No. This could be something, you guys. Go ahead. Well, that's my thing. You need to talk to your mom. and whoever delivered you about your birth and maybe see if something traumatic happened around your neck. Let me ask you this, not to be too personal, but have you ever been attacked by a giraffe?

Good point. I'm just saying. Let's just get down to it. Okay. Make fun of my thing, but you can experience trauma during birth and it will come back in your adult life and affect you in different ways. I had to wear a neck brace. I had a football injury in 11th grade.

So I'd wear a neck brace for like three weeks, and they call me Myrtle the Turtle. It was terrible. They couldn't move. Yeah, because I had a neck brace. They were like, oh, myrtle turtle, everybody. It was a terrible nickname. Oh, my goodness. I didn't.

So if I walked up behind you and just was like, hey, I put my hand on your, like, shoulder neck, you wouldn't like that? No, like, I'd probably, like, hit you in your gut. It's like a knee-jerk reaction to anything. Like, if something comes in my neck, I'm like, uh, attack you. Anybody else have any other rational fears? Like, and we don't have to say it right now, but just period. Irrational fears that you always are concerned.

Oh, that's it for me. Think about that. Talking about irrational fears, because Morgan number two, our webgirls, I can't have anybody touch on my neck. Lunchbox has one. I think a snake is going to jump up through my car engine and bite me. He's always thought that. It just scares me. I always have that thought that some way it's going to just go through the engine and get me while I'm driving.

I have an irrational fear that I'm going to be late somewhere. That is true. Oh, come on. What? Yeah. I mean, it's never happened, but that's so irrational. At least you're admitting you're irrational. Yeah, yeah.

Hey, Shantara, is that your name? Yes. Thank you for calling. What's going on? Tell me your irrational fear. I have a super rational fear of crickets. Why? Well, I have an awesome older brother who used to torture me with crickets.

He would lock me in closets and throw little crickets in there one by one. What in the world? He's an awesome brother, but yes, he was one of those older mean brothers. Holy, I mean brinkets, too. Shantara, thank you for the call and that therapy session. I appreciate you. You go talk to somebody about that.

Probably crooked nightmare. Samantha and Williamsburg, good morning. Good morning. What do you think? You have an irrational fear? I do. So I have a couple, but the one that can relate with the neck is I'm scared that someone's

going to cut off my neck when I'm sleeping, so I have to sleep with the covers up to my head. Even if I'm like really hot, it's so stupid. That's good because there's no way an axe, we'll go through a comforter. No. No, I'm with you. Dad, thank you for, thank you for that.

Appreciate you. Thank you. Have a great day. Thank you for calling the show. That's really cool you called. I mean, it's crazy. Why you call, that's really cool that you called. Hey, Renee and Albany.

For rational fear is people touching my wrist. And I don't know why or where it came from, but I have this crazy phobia. I actually passed out in high school doing a biology lab with taking my and it was because I was touching my wrist. Wow. I wonder what it is way back in the day that made you worry about your wrists. Yeah.

I don't know. I think it might have been when I was a kid. I had motion sickness traveling, so I used to wear those like sea bands and they have like a little ball on your wrist and they always made me uncomfortable. So I don't know if that's where it came from, but I hate it so much. Well, Renee, thank you for sharing your story with us. I appreciate that. Appreciate you.

Appreciate you. Thank you, Bobby. Thank you. Well, I don't really have anything super irrational. I'm scared of needles, but I think that's pretty common. I've passed out a few times from needles, and it's never the needle itself. It's always right before I get it and I'm so tight, or it's always when Amy chases me with one after work. Those are the two things.

I got it, I got you, boy. Bobby, come here. So Amy has two children. She went through the adoption process for five years. They've now lived here for a month. Yeah. It's been almost five weeks. How's that adjustment coming at five weeks?

I think sometimes I feel like we're taking two steps forward and then we take four steps back. Four steps back. Wow. Yeah. It's just, you know, us also trying to figure out and then us realizing mistakes we're making, even if it's a week later, man, that's not how we should have handled that. Because we're not, you know, our kids are coming from a different circumstances than if they had been in our loving home for, you know, You know, my daughter's 10. Let's say she had been nurtured and loved by us for 10 years.

So sometimes we approach things as if though that's the case. And it's just not. But that's the natural insane to treat her like that. But it's just not. We have to have a different approach. And we're educating ourselves better than than ever, but trying to figure out the best way for them to feel safe and loved. What's been the most rewarding and the most difficult?

The most rewarding for me is times where it is really calm and like we've been a family forever and we're just loving things are happening. Like I had a moment the other night after they both got out of the shower. We shower before bedtime so that way they can get to school in time and don't have to mess with it then. And they both needed lotion and they came up through

with the bottle, mom, mom, lotion. And I just sat there and put lotion on their legs and like it was so quiet and loving and it felt like they trusted me to put lotion on their skin which I know that sounds weird but they don't they haven't had that. I didn't even know

you were going to ask me about this and I even know this would be my answer but that that's what came to my mind is that moment right there was really special and hearing them truly say mom and dad when they really there's times where I know they're milking it a little bit like mom dad there's also times where it's hard and they say us by they call us by our first names intentionally to be because they know that that's it's part of the attachment issue and they're rebelling a little bit with it but I don't blame them for it. I don't mean they're rebelling in a bad way, but they're fighting. They're resistant. They're resisting it. And then that's the best, would you ask me? What's been the most difficult adjustment? The most difficult is, um, not the worst, but

okay, sorry, the most difficult would be trying to understand what they're going through and I can't. And at night, I just want them to like get in their bed and feel safe and sleep. Because why wouldn't you have this big comfortable bed in this room that we got just for you but they don't want it and they don't feel i don't think they feel that secure right now i don't think they fully grasp what we have to offer them and what we want to give them and i don't blame them for not they've never had it in their whole life so nighttime is really hard and then that leads to lack of sleep i think for me just trying to balance that but just know that this is this will pass and maybe I go a year with having to just sleep with him or her, mostly her, and that's okay.

Maybe I just have to do that. So we'll see. Like last night I legit, I don't think I slept last night. That's probably why I'm emotional right now. I'm just tired, but I'm not complaining. She just really wanted to sleep on the floor. Anyways, this whole thing. And then I couldn't get her to change her mind, but I wanted her to have the choice.

like she's never had choices. So I said, okay, I'm not going to make you sleep in the bed. Where do you want to sleep? I want to sleep right here and I want you next to me. So I just have to say, okay, so there I am sleeping on the floor all night. That's difficult trying to give them choices and get them have a voice. They've ever had a voice. And in our home, I want them to feel like they have a voice.

Like they deserve that. deserve to feel like any other person that's grown up with a home and a loving family and a voice. I know you're not complaining about life asleep, but I am. Where are you going with this? Because I'm sure it was not here. I mean, I don't know. And let me say this.

That's how you know that nobody knows what's going to happen on the show except for me. And we didn't know I was going to talk about that. Nobody ever knows what we're going to talk about in the show except for me. So we can keep it as real and as human as possible. Because otherwise you could go, let me. read my script. Bobby, you are so funny. Thank you for writing this. You know, it's just, no, I just wanted to know. I just wanted. It's, it is great. I will say, I feel like we prepared ourselves a little bit, but now that we're now, even five weeks in, I mean, any free time I've had

the past yesterday and the day before has been podcasts of families that are adopting kids from hard places and or fostering whatever the case that may look like. I mean, I'm looking for any and all resources just to be as educated as possible because I don't want to mess this up. Well, I appreciate your vulnerability and how open you are. And so are our listeners. And I don't think you're going to mess it up. I don't think you can mess it up.

I think you can just do what you do. We can by not trying to inform ourselves on how to give them. them what they need. I don't think it's messing up. I think you're learning as you go and you're going to mess up. And for sure you're going to mess up, that's not messing up. That's just going to the process. Yeah.

Okay. True. Boom. I'll drop that nugget on you. Hey, can you give me that tissue? Yeah, yeah. Take her the whole box. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, you're welcome. Yeah. Hey, I've also adopted. This is my little baby Bobby. Baby Bobby. The little Bay. Yeah. Yeah.

She too survived the hard. Yeah. Yeah. She took her off top of the building and lunchbox missed her. And so I have adopted her. Now she sits in the studio. Yeah, and last night was rough for us

because she sat here and I was at home in the bed. So I come in to see her, though. That's amazing that she'll do that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then she doesn't, she's good. You don't even have to feed her. It's crazy. No, no, we're a good kid.

She doesn't cry. I'll put her on my instant story. Mr. Bobby Bones. I just, you know, I'd have changed her clothes. It's all good. Yeah. Kind of a personal dilemma for lunchbox to buy life insurance for himself.

because his wife suggested it. So I guess you think she's going to try to off you or something? Well, I had never heard anything about life insurance. And just the other day, she was like, hey, you ever thought about getting life insurance? And I was like, well, you're the one that gets it if I die. So why are you bringing that up? And so I thought about it. And everybody's like, no, you need to do it.

So I took the plunge and I bought life insurance. So I'm just putting you guys on notice. If something happens, you need to hire a detective because there's, something suspicious. Well, they always say it. Something goes down. It's always the person to investigate that's the closest to her. Yes, because she watches a lot of those dateline and, you know, whatever,

snapped and things like that. So I'm a little nervous that she's up to something, but I'm taking a chance. You're nervous? Your wife of two years. Two years. It's up to something. Yeah, because she suggested life insurance. She's never suggested that

ever, but all of a sudden it's like, hey, why do you go ahead and click that life? insurance button Mr. Lunchbox? And I was like, Mr. Lunchbox. But I did it. What's that cost you a month, you know? Like six bucks? What's the payout?

It's more than my salary. Yeah. Get it. Smart woman. Get your bones on the Bobby Ponds show. Monday morning confession. Monday morning confessions. Caitlin in Wisconsin, go ahead, confess.

So when my kids are, really stressing me out. I go in my closet and I eat my Oreos. There you go. Oh. It's okay. Yeah, no judgment here. That's all right. You do you. Thank you for calling. Monday morning confession, Sarah in Oklahoma.

Yes. Confess. Good morning. Good morning. So sometimes before I send my kids to my mother-in-laws, I'll give them a bunch of sugar in pop so that they're hyper for her. And that's okay. It's going to mess up. No, no, no. That's funny.

That's okay. But it's okay. No, no, that's okay. That's you do you. That's okay. Thank you. No judgment. Thank you.

Victoria in Oklahoma, Monday morning confessions. Good morning. Good morning. Go ahead. So I have been lying to my children for 10 years now and told them I was allergic to cats because they've always wanted a cat. And I'm not allergic to cat. And that's, you know, that's okay. It's a little white lie.

It's okay. Sort of. Good for you. You do you. That's okay. Monday morning confessions. Amanda in Central Alabama. Good morning.

I have a boyfriend of 11 years, and he thinks him are an awful driver, and I backed over a parking lot barrier the other day, and I haven't told him yet. And anything happened to the car? Yes. It messed up my muffler, but I haven't told him. You know what? That's okay. It's okay. You know?

I probably won't tell him. Yeah. you. You'll never notice. You do you. That's okay. No, no, no, Monday morning company. You do you. You're cleansed. Brianna, Charleston, South Carolina. Good morning. Good morning. My kids think you can only go to Chequette cheese if you're invited to a birthday party that's happening that day. And why would they think that? Just because it's too much to take them and the run around and it costs a whole bunch of money. So they think that the only time you're allowed to go is if there's a birthday party going on for one of your friends

you were invited to, otherwise you're not allowed in. And you told them then. Yep. Yeah. You know what? That's okay. That's okay. Good parenting.

You know what? You do you. That sort of makes sense. Every parenting style is different. You do you. You do you. Thank you. Page in Oklahoma, Monday morning confessions.

I wrecked my boyfriend struck this weekend, but there was no damage, so I didn't tell him. You know what? You do you. That is. I'm just glad you're okay. That's exactly how you should handle that. Yeah, yes. You can handle it better.

So far, I sort of like. We're late to all of them? Yeah. A little bit, yes. Yeah, I'm like, okay, yeah. Feels good. We're not alone. The Bobby Bonds show.

We'll do a couple more. Monday morning confessions. Eden and North Carolina, welcome to the show. Hi. So for 20 or for my daughter's eight years of life, anytime she hears the music on ice cream truck, she thinks she's out of ice cream. Oh.

That one's bad. You know what? That's fine. You do you. Yeah, you do you. Thank you for, you're cleansed. Good. Thank you for sharing that with us.

Oh. What? Cleanse. I can't say that. She's cleansed. No, you can't. If you share with us, it's now okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Hey, Lori. Yeah. Monday morning confession, go ahead. I went to the gym this morning and on the way home, I stopped at McDonald's. Oh. Yeah. That's totally fun. I had to have a hashbrown.

You know what? You're cleansed because he told us. Those calories don't count. Good for you. You know what? Do you feel good? Good. You do you.

Lurray, thank you. It's like it never happened. Yeah. No more Monday morning confessions. Thank you for them. Until next week. So. This kid 13 years old was suspended for talking back to those teachers at school.

So three days and his mom said, hey, you got to go work for free for those three days. So she went up and put up on all the light posts. He will work for free. Yard service. it will do Reg Leaves, Mo Yard, whatever you need. He gave us a call. So for three days, this 13-year-old

is out doing community service for the neighbors. I'm reading that. That's pretty good. She put it on Facebook, too. Yeah, that's awesome. Oh, man. That's social media. It'll get you now.

Yep. So I'll ask this to you parents at their creative ways you've had to punish your kids. Because, again, there are certain ways that you can get to certain people. I mean, I even deal with that on the show with different personalities.

And not punishing, but just talking to. Everybody has to be communicated with differently. But creative ways you've had to, like, punish your kid. 877-Bobby. That's the phone number. Kid got to spend it three days, and her mom was like, okay, for three days, you'll be going out and doing it. I bet that was one nice neighborhood, though.

Trash picked up. Yard mode. This kid got to spend it for three days at school. He's 13 years old. And his mom said, okay, so she gets on Facebook. She says, hey, my kid will do whatever work you need. Break your leaves, mow your yard, clean your gutters. And then, just to make it worse, she goes and put signs up on all the life holes all around the neighborhood.

I was like, man, that is a creative way to punish your kid. Becky and Virginia, thank you for calling. What's going on? I just had something to say about how you correct your children. My son was 18, turned 18. He had just had surgery and was on crutches on his foot. and on the way to the doctor's office, for his follow-up, he just thought he was going to sass mouth me, and I told him that wasn't going to work, and he said, I'm 18 years old.

I'm a man now. I said, okay. And I dropped him off in front of the doctor's office, and he said, where are you going? I said, I'm going home. He said, what am I supposed to do? I said, you're a man. Call a cab. Yay!

Yay! And he showed up. up at home and a yellow cab. That's funny. About an hour and a half later, because if you're 18 years old, then you figure it out if you want to stass mouth your mama. That's funny. Good call.

Appreciate you. Daddy, because he's now, this, my son is now a police officer. You taught him. Yeah. There you go. There, you know. Yeah, probably a better cop, too. You taught him a lesson.

Don't sass mouth your mom. How about this one? This is a funny one. Hello. Amber in Iowa. Good morning. Good morning. Thank you for calling and tell me your story.

Yeah, my two boys, they were eight and five at the time, and we were at the barber shop getting their haircut, and they decided to act up, so I told the barbers to stop, and we walked out with terrible haircuts for six weeks. Wait a minute. So in mid-haircut, you said, Mr. Barber, please stop, and they left with half-haircuts.

Yep. And they lived with them for six weeks. Six weeks, yep, six weeks. never acted up again there. That's amazing. That's an amazing story. So good. Yeah.

That's a, I appreciate you. That's a great story. Thank you for calling. I'm learning so much. Taking notes. Thank you. Let's go over to Ryan and Virginia. Hey, Ryan, good morning.

Good morning. Thank you for hanging out. Yeah, first time caller. Yay. So my sister is very strong-willed and really likes to call my parents' bluff. So they were driving down. the interstate one time and it was my mom and my sister in the car and my mom kept

saying, stop talking to me like that, stop acting like this and my mom said, if you don't stop, I'm going to make you get out. So my sister didn't stop and my mom picked her out of the car on the side of the interstate and made her wait for my dad who was five miles back and my mom called my dad and said, you might want to pick her daughter up

on the side of the road. Oh my gosh. That sounds really... That sounds like old school. That's nice. Yeah. That was hard. The side of the interstate? The highway? Oh, boy.

A lot of best cars. I don't know how I feel about that one. For dangerous. Hey, thank you for the call. She's okay. Right. Appreciate you. Yeah, she's okay, right?

Oh, she's fine. Okay. To this day, she, like, can't get on highways. They still can't find her. Yeah. Okay. Highway, yeah. Okay.

Yeah. Thank you for the call. Whoa. Whoa. Oh. Ryan and Clarksville. Good morning, buddy. Good morning. How are you doing, Bobby? I'm good. I mean, it's that early morning. What are you doing right now?

I'm currently driving to a job at. Oh, man. How's that going? So far, so good. I feel like you have a voice changer on, like the FBI. Your voice is so deep, Ryan, that you've committed a crime when you're hiding. But you're just that manly, huh? I do have very low voice. I can comments on it all the time. How big old boy are you? I'm 6-4, about 240.

That sounds about right. That's what a 6-4-2-40 voice sounds like. So what's this job about, Ryan, you're going for today? It's a district management position for Earth's rental car. Yeah. You feel pretty good about it or no? I'm feeling pretty good about it. I meet with the GM today, so hopefully it's a new job.

Yeah, so, well, I'm sure you have a plan of action. I'd like to offer you a couple tips on interviews if you'd like to hear them. I would love to hear him. If you go in and you ask questions and you kind of take control of the interview a bit, let him get a few out, but you start asking questions one after the other, at least three in a row.

He'll feel like, whoa, this dude's so prepared that he's already asking how he can make things better. Instead of him wondering if you're going to make things better, which I interview people all the time. And it's, I ask question, ask question, and I go, hmm, I wonder if their answers are real. When they start asking me questions, I'm like, whoa, they want to fix things.

Like, I enjoy that as an interviewer when people put it back on me. So if you have a couple questions you can ask about the job, holy cow, does it make a difference? Does that make sense? I got a lot of questions. Good, good, good. And then you got to keep the heart rate low.

I have a song for that. Are you familiar with the song? It is. So I'm going to play a little bit for you here. This is Seven Nation Army from White Stripes. You play this, and you're somehow able to get pumped up while also bringing the heart rate down.

You never perform at max level if your heart rate's up. And it's hard if you're nervous, you're feeling your neck. your head, your hand, your arms. You get that heart rate low. It doesn't matter if you're speaking somewhere. You have a job interview. That's it.

Dude, good luck at you. I hope you feel good about it because you go in, feeling comfortable, you perform better, you know what I mean? Exactly. So I feel pretty comfortable, so everything should go pretty smoothly today. Well, cool. Will you give us a call back after it happens

and, you know, let us know? I will. I think your show might be off. by the time I get out. No, let me know. Call us back, you know, a couple days whenever they offer you the job. All right, we'll do.

All right, buddy. Well, good luck to you, my friend. Thank you. All right, see you later. There you go. There it is. Still the jam, right? Oh, of course.

Yeah. I have to figure out a new song to walk out to for my stand-up act. This used to be the song to walk out to. That new act, new song. Yeah, new. I just knew you want things to be new. New year, new you?

Well, I don't do, nor do I do the shoulder shimmy you're doing as you say that. Here's Amy's pile of stories. Bobby, you're in with a trend for 2018. You're already doing it. I'm doing it a lot. Yeah, I was hanging out by themselves watching Nick at night.

If it is, I'm in. No, but there's some fitness trends that I was reading about for this year. And boxing is at the top of the list. I was doing it last year. I know. You're ahead of the car. You're so fashion. No, workout forward.

Yeah, to me, I actually work with a trainer. We lift and we box. But the boxing classes where I'm at are really cool. lot of people come and, you know, it's a big cardio thing. It's not punching each other. But, yeah, boxing's good because it's different and it's high cardio and it's actually kind of fun. And it feels like you're boxing, which everybody kind of has a dream in their mind.

They at least get into one boxing match at some point. Don't you think that it would be fun to box somebody at least once? Me? Yeah. No. Oh, never mind. I'm a girl. But I heard all the Victory Secret Angels before a big runway show.

They all do boxing. There was some motivation. There's a lot. I enjoy it a lot. Go ahead. Millennials are going broke because of social media. Evidently, it's become their financial Achilles heel because people are seeing things online and social media and Instagram that they wouldn't have ever seen before regarding their

friend's style, fashion, or even trips. And it makes them want it so they go spend money on it. That makes sense. Keeping up with the Joneses, but it's on social media instead of next door. That's tough. And also, I buy stuff that's fed to me through my feed. This isn't even taking new account. The sponsored ads that we all get suckered into now, too.

I used to find it annoying, and now I'm thinking, you're really getting to know me, Instagram. I'm going to buy that. Like, thanks for being a friend. I used to be scared of you, but now we've really grown. Our relationship's solid. Okay. Bobby, on our show, everybody, you know, we're a mix, boys and girls. Yeah, actually eight people, four guys, four females.

Okay, so let's say if we're all single, what's our show dating rules? Like, would we be allowed to date on the show? No. No? No. Like way back, way back in the day when Lunchbox and I were both single, you wouldn't let us date?

I wouldn't keep you from it, but I would say odds are you're not going to stay together and it's just going to be awkward and eventually somebody's going to lose their job. Not because you're dating, but because you're just not able to stand each other. And it's going to make the environment toxic. So I don't think I would put a rule in place,

but I would say, that's what's going to happen? You're gambling with it. So. Well, I'm sure every workplace has different rules, but over at Facebook, they do allow their employees to date. However, you have, to have success when you ask them out the first time. If you ask them out and they say no,

you're done. You cannot ask out again. That should be in life pretty much. That would be said, I never had any date. I've only, because I work all the time, I've only ever dated people that's been associated with work in some way because I did it a couple artists. I've dated, went on dates with a stylist who I met through Dirks. Dirk set us up. Well, you had one really long relationship where you didn't know her through work. That's true. And that was probably the longest one. But you always meet your people through work. Somebody who worked in promotions back in the day. So I'm not against it.

It's just if you work super, super close, it's probably not going to last and it's going to make the relationship pretty toxic. So you've never asked out anybody twice. Oh, like nine times. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, not at Facebook. Yeah, I wouldn't be able to work on Facebook.

Nobody's ever said yes the first time, ever to me. What? My wife was like, I had to ask her five times. And who wants to go out with somebody that accepts you the first time? I don't. Because that means she's probably, or they've probably done it to,

hundreds of other people. No, I don't think that. Oh, no. Wait, why, Bobby? I don't know why. Please explain. I don't, you ever hear the Groucho Marx thing where he doesn't want to be a part of any club that wants to have him? I don't know who that is.

Okay. Yeah, who is that? Silent comedy actor, great writer. Back in the day. Back in the day. So his analogy was, why would I want to be a club that wants me? I'm not worth anything. So why would I be in a club that would have someone like me?

The club obviously isn't worth. You want the clubs that don't want you and you want them to eventually? I want the girls that are way better than me. Okay. And I think I've been able to convince some girls and some lovely, somehow, honestly God, I feel like every time it's been, ooh, it's eventually going to figure this out. Right. Now, we're the same.

We don't know how that happens. Oh, you mean with me? Yeah, with you. Yeah, I appreciate that. Yeah. So yes, there you go. Okay. So Ben and Jerry's is launching a low-calorie ice cream called Muiforia.

They're trying to beat out Halo Top, which is a super popular, healthy or supposedly low-calorie ice cream. So moo for you, you can start looking for that in chocolate milk and cookies, caramel cookie fix, and peanut butter dough. Is that moo like cow, moo for you, like euphoria? Mooria. Okay, I didn't quite, yeah, I didn't know what you're talking about. I checked out how to do that story, but I got it now.

Oh, well, people that love Ben and Jerry's, I'm telling them, look for the low calorie. Got it. Moo. Thank you. You don't have to like everything in my pile, but that's my pile. That's why it's your pile. And that's it. That's Amy's Pile.

That was Amy's Pile of Stories. Your Bones on Bobby Bones Show. Okay, we are going home, but thank you for listening. You can catch up on everything. Just search Bobby Bones show on demand on IHartRadio. Search Bobby Bones show on iTunes. You can listen to the whole thing. Listen to Bobbycast, a show I do from my house.

Just search that too, all that. Thanks for being here. We would not be able to pay our mortgages or eat our meals without you listening. Right, Amy? That's right. We appreciate you. Thank you. We'll see you soon.

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