The Bobby Bones Show - Annoying In-Law Stories + Lunchbox Guesses Weight + Men Wearing Engagement Rings

Episode Date: December 26, 2017

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and have insurance and vision. dental. What could a good place that they provide insurance that we're lucky. Now, that being said, I come away from it going I'm lucky, but it does stink that cost so much. Lunchbox comes away from and thinking it's a conspiracy. Well, his wife

got life insurance, and now he thinks she's up to something. Oh, great. Yeah, because I'm doing the whole fill-out thing, and she goes, oh, life insurance, I think you need to get that. And I'm like, wait a minute. I've never had life insurance ever, and if I'm

Correct. Life insurance means if I die, then she gets some money. Right? Is that what that means? Yeah. So I don't know why she's pointing to life insurance going, hey, you need to get life insurance. So what that tells me is, hey, all of a sudden she's thinking, man, if I off this guy, I get some money. Yeah, because that's really easy to just off you. I mean, people do it. I mean, why is she so adamant that I need life insurance? Because you guys have built a relationship. And if you, you guys have built a relationship. and if you go away and maybe she can't afford the house payment that you guys have got into together. Does she

have life insurance? I don't know. No, she doesn't have life insurance. Why don't you ask her for it? Oh, Mr. Lunchbox, why do you get life insurance? Why do you go and click that life insurance button? Does she call you Mr. Lunchbox? I thought she calls you Daddy. I don't know.

I mean, just a little shady to me. I don't know. That's just weird. Yeah. So if I go missing, you guys know She is the first suspect because all of a sudden I got this life insurance stuff. All of a sudden, I got this life insurance stuff. I have life insurance on me. Why, for who?

Yeah, who's going to off you? I don't even want to tell you who gets it right now. I know who it is. Who? Amy. It is Amy right now. Amy's my first contact. I would get your life insurance.

Right now you would. Why do you think she needs your life? Yeah, why? It's not that. It's not that she gets kids. It's I have nobody else to give it to her. What do you mean? My foundation's your.

Life insurance, that's amazing. Two kids, a wife. A lot of debt. Wow, I feel honored. My goal is to not have me, Amy. Oh, yeah, for sure. Like, I'm Amy's like third string, right? Like, here's the thing.

Amy's got a husband. She's got two kids coming. And like, I'm Amy's, maybe like eight strings. You know, the fan members. I don't. Like, Amy's my emergency contact. Amy's, I guess my, I had to feel out of the day. This is the first I'm hearing about meeting the recipient of your life.

Great. Bones. Now, if you ever go missing. We know. Hey, like my said, I'm telling you, you got to be careful. Wow. I plan on changing it. But right now, if I were to go, because I don't have a will, still don't have a will.

Still? Still? Because I'll die. You got to get on this. Eddie, don't worry about it. It's going to be going to Amy, so we don't need to worry about that. Go ahead. What's the difference in, like, you made life insurance.

Why do you think that? Okay, you won't make a will because you think it's going to make you die. But why choose life insurance if you think it's going to make you die? It was on the screen and it said I had to fill out and pick somebody. And so it was just there. and I was like, okay, it comes like four bucks a month. Wow, that's not bad. Yeah.

I should do that. But I won't tell my wife. I'll just do it. Does it have specifications on house? Oh, no, he's getting greedy. Mr. Bobby Bowles. Wow. Recognizing people, doing cool things.

It's ICU. This Bosu Body Bar restaurant, they found a way around the rule that you can't feed the homeless with the leftovers. Because the rule is you can't just take food at the end of the night and go, okay, everybody, come get the free food. and so what happens is when the shifts are over, employees take out these brown paper bags of food that's given to them, and they leave them on the street for homeless people in need.

They say, quote, when we close the doors for the day, we promise to leave bags of food outside. They're not breaking the law. No. They're not passing it out. No. The employees get free food, and so what they choose to do with it is they put in a bag and they leave it out there for people who need it.

Genius. It's a good way to work around the system right there. I see you. Bobby Bones. Bobby Bones. Like to go around the room. What dumb thing stresses you out? Not like real life things.

But what dumb thing? You're like, oh, I'm not stressed about it. Eddie, you're first. Oh, I'll tell you right away. Getting yogurt at the grocery store stresses me out. What do you mean? There are, I don't know, 500 flavors of yogurt, and my wife will send me to the grocery store and say,

hey, will you pick up some yogurt on the way home? Which one? Like, I cannot. And my son likes honey vanilla or something. I can't find it, dude. it takes me 10 minutes to find yogurt, that stresses me out. Did people like vanilla anything except ice cream? Like vanilla to me is not an attractive.

Of all the flavors, you choose vanilla? My three-year-old loves honey vanilla. Like vanilla will be something you're stuck with and you're like, not bad. Who chooses? Oh, my husband. Vanilla all day, every day. That's not even a real flavor. Even the smell vanilla.

It's not bad. The smell. A vanilla candle. Like a hay vanilla candle. Okay, so yogurt is for you. Yogurt at the grocery store. I mean, what dumb thing? Well, mine is also a grocery store related

and it's either picking out avocados, like which one is going to be the ripe one or like pairs or something where there's like multiple kinds of pairs but you don't know which pair is better. Stuff like that really stress me. I can stand at the avocados of the pair section

at the grocery store for like five minutes. Finally, sometimes I just ask a store employee, can you tell me which avocado you think I'm going to cut into and it's going to be perfect? Pick for me, please. I'll just close my eyes. It's hard. For me, stupid things to stretch you out.

If my phone has any red numbers on it, they must go fast. And if I, like ones or twos or none. No updates, no email, no text message. Like Amy's phone drives me bonkers. Red everywhere. How many email, Amy, do you have? You haven't opened up. 1,479.

Oh, man. That's my heart you heard. Yeah. What else you got? How many texts have you not open? 17. That, to me, is amazing. I don't even know where they are. They're so far down the bottom.

Bones, I have 4,478 emails unopened. You guys make me vomit, but not in a series. What about voicemails? 20. That to me is... Oh, yeah, you keep your voicemail full. So do I. Mine's full now.

You can't even... But yours is full in accident. Yeah, yeah. Mine is my voicemail going, hey, listen, I'm probably not going to check these anyway because who checks the voicemail anymore. I love that. But just send me a text message, and I check it. That's what stresses me.

It makes me feel gross inside. Lunchbox. It's easy. It is trying to figure out which show I'm going to watch on DVR. During the day, I'm like, I go home and I'm like, I have a list of shows that I want to watch. And I'm all recorded it and trying to decide which one to watch drives me nuts. You really worry. I really worry because I'm like, well, if I catch up with that show, I only have three episodes so I could watch it all today.

But this one is more recent and it just throws me off and it really stresses me out. On our Facebook page, what dumb thing? These aren't serious things. They're real life things. They're all pretty dumb. But what dumb thing stresses you out? Bobbybones.com. Hit her Facebook page.

The Bobby Bones show. The Bobby Bones. All right, we need some positivity. Let's do it. People were eating Applebee's, they were happy to find out that a stranger paid their check for them. A mystery couple has been quietly picking up tabs for customers for like the last three months. They go to Appleby's and they sit and they go, we'll pay for that. and they've been doing it for three months.

Wow. Like Appleby's knows who it is, but they don't want to run this. Isn't that funny? That's kind of cool. So cool. Yeah. Amy? Well, shout out to ICU grandpa. Have y'all heard of him?

I have not. And it's not ICU. It's literally like intensive care unit for babies. So he goes and holds babies for parents that can't at the time. So for whatever reason, the parents can be in the ICU with their baby. So he volunteers his time and he's been doing so for 12 years. He just goes and. holds them. That's cool.

And there's a photo of him that's completely gone viral on Facebook. And his nickname is, I see you, grandpa. Hi, the letter C, you. Yes. I see you, like a tent of care unit. Lunchbox. Gretchen is a cop in Florida, and you know, you're used to her pulling people over, woo, woo, but what Gretchen does is she goes around and she loves cats.

So when she's on duty, off duty, she finds stray cats, rescues them, gets them spayed, neutered, and then finds them new homes because she's Gretchen the cat lady. Man, everybody's got a nickname. Yeah, what's your nickname? Secret Applebee's people? Applebee's awesomeness? There you go.

All right, thank you. That's your good news. Come on, Bobby Bones show. There's the Luke Combs song. When it rains, it pours. He won't 100 bucks with a scratch-off? If you want 100 bucks today on a scratch-off ticket, what would you do with the 100 bucks?

Today. Lunchbox. That's easy. Reinvest. Oh, you buy more scratch-offs. That's what it's meant to do. So if you want 100 bucks, you would buy more. More scratch-offs.

Yes, hoping to hit it big because $100 is nice, but $50,000 or $1,000 or $25,000 a year for life, that's even better. There it is. Amy, you went $100 bucks on a scratch-off ticket today. There's this vegan jacket at free people. There's a vegan jacket? You can eat it? No, that's cool.

It's not real leather. So if you get hungry and you're not that cold, you just eat the sleeve? No, it's pleather. Oh, okay. Get it? So it's, like, also way cheaper. It actually is, like, just under $100. $98, $98, I think, I'd go buy that.

Eddie, you want $100 on a scratch-off ticket? What do you do with it? I would love to buy some cool sunglasses, but let's be real. I'm just going to go to Chuckie Cheese and throw $100 on that. So the kids can go. Pizza, games, probably a picture of beer for daddy. I'm going to buy a pair of shorts. These Nike Elite shorts are pretty expensive workout shorts, but these, they're like

70 bucks. They're awesome. What makes them so elite? Nike Elite. Because I believe they're called Elite. Just the texture and the fit. Like, I have one pair, and I'm like, I got to buy more. Someone gifted me a pair, and I love them.

And I'm just too lazy to buy them. Oh, yeah, they look cool, too. Yeah, it's like... Whoa. I box in them, and they don't chafe my buttocks, which is awesome. So that's what I would do. So Luke Combs just does weather songs, huh? Yeah, he's the weather guy.

Do you know what his next single is going to be? Hold on, wait, man. So the first one was a hurricane, and this one's when it rains, it pours. Yeah. If he's not careful, he's going to be the weather guy. guy. Okay. So what's the next single? Partly cloudy with a chance of love. Is it really? No, I have no idea.

Eddie now we're having this conversation. Make news, y'all. Come on. No, no, no, no. Here's the thing. Eddie was the person who said this about Luke Combs songs. And then I said partly cloud, cloudy with a chance of heartbreak. We totally just shifted each other. That's how we went. I thought it was going to be cloudy with a chance of love or whatever you said. Oh, yeah? Farley cloudy.

No, I would say high humidity on the dance floor. I hope, man. Nice. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mine's fog on a Sunday morning. Dang. Lobby Bone Show. Bonehead.

Story up the day. This story comes to us from Tunica, Mississippi. A man was at the lake, and he was trying to back his boat into the water. So he's on the little boat ramp, backing it up, backing up. Car gets stuck in park. He's like, I'll just climb underneath the car and force it into neutral. Only problem is there's no one in the driver's seat. He forces it neutral

And runs himself over Y'all How did you catch that like five seconds after I did? Because I knew as soon as he said it But he, no, he didn't die The bonehead you can't have a death But Judge, did you know that's how my grandpa died? Oh, my goodness.

Oh, no. Amy. Oh, no. This is not good. It's fine. It's fine. So my grandpa, I never knew him. He died when my dad was a month old,

but it was in the Dilley, Texas paper. Wasn't it a tractor? He was a watermelon farmer, and he was unloading watermelons from his truck, and the truck went in neutral, and he was behind it, and it ran him over. My stepdad once was parking a boat ramp, and put the truck up. There was no room to park the trailer and the truck, so he had to park him beside each other. Love the truck in neutral, all the way down, hit a curve, bush, sank the truck in like 20 feet of water. This is really bad.

Mine is kind of bad. Watchboxes is pretty funny because they got lived. He's got some brozes. Yeah, we gave you a whole bunch of feels there. Amy took it dark. Wait, hey, I never knew him. I'm Lunchbox. That's your Bonehead story today.

Like, that makes it okay. No. Gather around the iPhone. I'm about to bring to you the eighth wonder of the world. He's got hair and spots I've never seen before. Ladies and gentlemen, look. Welcome the wait-guessor. Lunchbox, there.

Yeah. Glad to be here. Glad to be. here. Katie and Arkansas. Hello. Hey, stop bite up. Stop bite up. Hey, Katie. Good morning. Good morning. Hey, where are you calling from?

I'm calling from Moralton, Arkansas. Ah, I know it well. How about this? Lunchbox will guess your weight within five pounds. And if he doesn't, I'll give you a prize, okay? All right. All right. So, he only has a few seconds to ask you questions. And if he asks you anything like how much do you weigh, don't answer that question. Okay. All right. All right, cool. Here we go. Lunchbox, you're on. What is her name? Katie.

Katie. What type of shoes do you wear to work? Comfy shoes. How many hours in day do you sit down? Probably about five. How tall are you? Five three. Time is up.

I'm sorry. You need to guess her weight within five pounds. That's easy. Comfy shoes. She chills. She only weighs about 1.30. What do you weigh? 133.

Down. Wow. And Katie, I hope you have a great day in those comfy shoes at work. Dang. Day. All right, let's bring on Deanna in New York. Hi, Deanna. Deanna.

Dina. Dina. Three, two, one. Goodbye. Oh, we lost her. Oh, man, that was a good one, too. How about Hannah in Cedar Rapids? Hi.

Hi, Hannah. Thank you for calling. Would you like to play Lunchbox Guesses Your Way? Yes, please. Go ahead. All right. What kind of soap do you use in the show? hour? For body soap, I use dove. And what's your favorite candy bar? I'm going to say

butterfingers. How many times do you get on a scale per week? Every day. What is your job? So you have to guess our weight within five pounds. It's Hannah and Cedar Rapids. She likes the butterfinger, but she's still worried about her weight because she gets on the scale every single day. Go ahead. She can't weigh more than 114. 114. What do you weigh Hannah? I'm one. 13. 14, just like I said. Okay. Dang.

Just like you said. Wow. Wow, wow, wow, wow. Let me grab one more. Man, Hannah, have a great day. Chrissy and the Lou. What are, Chrissy? Hi.

How are you? Good. How are you? I'm really good. Have we ever spoken before? No, we haven't. Okay, just making sure. So people don't think I'm putting on a bunch of cousins or something.

Lunchbox, go ahead. What is your favorite fast food restaurant? Taco Bell. Who is your favorite country artist? Kenny Chesney. And your favorite movie of all time? Across the universe. How old are you?

Oh, I'm sorry. Time's out. Time's out. All right, lunchbox, the name's Chrissy from St. Louis. Listen, if she likes Kenny Chesney, she likes the beat. She's got to keep in shape. 127. 127.

Chrissy, what do you weigh? 125. Oh, my goodness. He's leaving. That was good, dude. Thomas and Delaware. Good morning. Good morning.

What's up, dude? Is this Bobby? Yeah. Is this Thomas? Yeah, this is Thomas from Clarksville living in Delaware. And I'm getting ready to, I'm actually an hour and a half early from my job interview doing some, Love that. Love that.

Love that. Love it. Love it that you're early. So what? You're a little nervous? Do you sound like a little nervous? Yeah, of course. I'm a little nervous.

This is a game changer for the family and myself. So nervous in the good way. I put myself in a good position to get this interview. so I'm ready to knock it out the part. I just wanted some of that little music, motivational music that you always play for your listeners. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Remember this. Let me hit you for some motivational words first. Remember, you're nervous because it means something. It means something because you worked hard to get it. Now, the key to impressing someone when you're talking to them is your alert rate is up, but your heart rate is down. Okay? So what I've found is that you play the song,

Seven Nation Army by the White House. drives. And this song comes on. And you're like, all right. And it's pumping you up. You're like, I can do this. I can do this. But your heart stays solid, solid, solid. That's your heartbeat right there. That's your heartbeat right there. Your mind up, your heart down. You're thinking. You're thinking at a high level. But you're not acting crazy. So I take a second. I just play this song. I just play Seven Nation Army. That's it. Listen to the whole song. All right, I will. Yeah.

Take deep breaths. Know that you are in this spot. And even if you don't get this one, there'll be another one. There'll be three more. There'll be seven more because you're not going to stop until you get it. You know, it's hard to beat somebody who doesn't quit. Are you going to quit, Thomas? Never.

That's what I'm talking about. You can't beat somebody who don't quit. Are you going to quit, Thomas? Never. Never! All right, knock them dead, dude. You get an hour and 25 minutes. But still, an hour and 25 minutes, knock them dead.

Remember, alert up, heart down. Got it? Heart down. That's right. That's right. That's right. All right, good luck. Let us know how it goes.

Hey, I appreciate you. I appreciate you. Dang. I'm on to something there with that alert. That's really not a bit. That's not the words exactly. You have to be working on the phrasing. But the heart rate down is the thing.

Yes. It's like mind frame up, heart frame. Something. I'm not quite there yet. Yeah. I'm tinkering with it. You got time. That's how you know this in the scripted show.

Because that wasn't that good. Like the idea was good. You'll get there. But the words weren't exactly there. Talk it out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Everything I said, though, I stand behind, I think. Yeah, yeah.

I'll go listen back. Get your bones on. Bobby Bones show. Ladies and gentlemen, it's Bobby Bones time. Come on, Bobby Bones. Is there a food you just won't eat? Like, what's the, for me, it is onions? If there is an onion,

If I know there's an onion, I will not eat it. I cannot take an onion. Raw or cooked or a desire? Yeah, I do not care. Mine is raw onions. I can't eat an onion for anything. What do you have? I don't eat olives.

Nope. No, no, no, no. I like olives. No, and somehow they sneak up in whatever I'm eating, I'm like, ugh. I have to spit it out. I'm really dramatic about it, too. I like green full olives. You guys don't like those?

No, no, no. I don't care of green. black, whatever I don't want to eat. That's been more of an adult acquired taste. Since I've become mature, I've started like olives. More sophisticated palate. Yeah. So, no olives for you. No onions or mayonnaise for me.

Lunchbox, what food can you just not eat? Manas and tomatoes. If tomatoes are on it? No, tomatoes? Oh, tomatoes are disgusting. I send it back because they say, oh, you can just pick the tomatoes off. No, tomato juice gets on everything, and it ruins it. You take it back and get me a whole new sandwich or burger or whatever. If the

tomato touched it, it goes back. Sorry. Ugh. So far, it's onions, olives, tomatoes. We're really crushing the vegetables here, huh? Although tomatoes are fruit, I guess. Olives are not a vegetable. Are they?

What do you think they are meat? Yeah, I think they are, Amy. I think they are, Amy, I'm not going to add to all. You think it's a nasty piece of fat? Eddie? Oh, mine's controversial because I can't eat jalapinos. I won't do it. What?

I don't like them. Wait a minute. I don't even know who you are. Eduardo? Yes. The guy who pronounces narcos. Narcos. I cannot eat jalapenos.

On your tacos. Anywhere. Are your parents ashamed of you? Yes, because they order jalapenos on the side with everything. We go to McDonald's, they ask if they have jalapenos. That's weird. Yeah. That'd be like me going, I do not eat white bread.

No. No, it's not the same thing. No. Raymond, anything you don't eat? Produce Raymond? Yeah, sausage on my pizza. Sausage, period? I can eat sausage but just not on my pizza.

wins the pizza. What? Interesting. Don't be judging. You just said, I went on a whole rant about tomato juice. And he goes, what? Don't we judging? We all have our things.

But he eats sausage, but just not on his pizza. Okay. I hate peanut butter. I hate peanut butter. But I get a peanut butter. But I get a peanut butter cup. That's weird. That's weird.

Lobby bones. All right. Somebody on the show told me this. I'm going to keep it as a blind item because I don't want to get them in trouble. Amy, I'll let you tell it. Tell the in-law story. Okay. So, in-law's zone.

eat very healthy and they tried to do the right thing to make a, you know, create a healthy meal for someone coming over. And they made broccoli and they were super excited about it. But they doused it in butter and velvita cheese. So then person is like, I got to eat it because they're being nice. But I mean, it definitely like made them sick because they just like don't eat that way. So the thought was there that they tried to be kind and eat it anyway.

And they're like, how can they not get that butter, tons of butter and velvita? cheese is not healthy. So they don't like their in-laws food. Yeah, yeah. It's multiple situations just like that. Lauren at Fayetteville, North Carolina. Hey. Hey, good morning. What do you think about this in-law story? Good morning.

So my in-law, she is divorce day and she is finally moving into her own house and she keeps asking me for decorative style advice and I don't like anything that she does in her house and I feel so bad.

and so I just have to choose the least ugly of all the options. So she's picked out a lot of ugly stuff. You just go least ugly. Right. Oh, that's funny. Ah, thank you. Hey, appreciate you. So awkward.

So what is it about your in-laws that drive you crazy? Let's go to Amber in Wilmington, North Carolina. Hey, Amber. Hi, good morning. Thanks for calling. What do you want to say? I feel terrible saying it, but my family that I married into, is from the South. I'm not.

And every time that we go to leave, my father-in-law makes my daughter give her a kiss, like, make her give him a kiss on the lips. And, like, she's so uncomfortable. And I feel so bad, but he'll be like, come and give me some

sugar. Leaning back, but he, like, won't let her go until she gives her a kiss to buy. And I don't know how to, like, say, That's so funny. That's funny. I appreciate you.

That's so funny. That's a good call. Lunchbox kisses his dad on the left. Amber, did you do that? No. He does. Absolutely. Kiss my mom, my dad.

Yeah, no problem. Oh, well. Yeah, I think it's weird, too. Thank you for the call. Amy, you're up. Give me an in-law story. My in-laws are great. All right, there you go.

Lunchbox, give me an in-law story. Man, my mother-in-law just loves. likes to make things awkward. I don't know if she's trying to flirt with me or what, but she said, come on my God. Everybody's trying to plug you. She just says things. Like, last time I was around her, she just randomly goes, I know you don't like me. Oh, like a third grader would be like, yeah, like, I don't know what you're talking.

Like, she just makes things awkward. Does she hit you to make you like her? No, she just goes. And then I was like, no, I like you. I don't know. And then later that day, I know you don't like me. It's cool. What?

It's just like things like that. That's what I'm saying. She does that all the things like that. make just awkward and it's like okay we got some more on the phones too we're gonna grab some of these in a second hold on it we got good one hold on the baby bones show talking about what's annoying about your in-laws hey josh and tampa good morning hey good morning guys thanks for calling what you got for me uh my inlaws are super sweet people but they probably have the worst taste in food i've ever seen like their taste but they're just broken are they just old though

No, no, not all of them. Like her brother is not that old, and I made homemade slow-smoked ribs, my own spice rub. At the end, I caramelized my own homemade barbecue sauce on the end. And they took them to the fridge, and they literally grabbed ketchup and mustard and slathered them all over them. And my heart broke a little bit. Listen, just being the guy, objective guy, Josh, maybe your ribs aren't that good, bro. What? I know, I'm just saying, like, you can't hate the rib either.

I might have to send you some. I don't know. Now we're talking, Josh. Hey, anyway, I appreciate you for listening, buddy. Thank you very much. See, Josh. I'm just giving you a hard time, but it might be you. All right.

Ashley in Muskegan, Michigan. Thank you for calling. Hey, Bobby. What's happening? Well, I have, this is just one of many in-law stories that I have. So my mother-in-law told me on our fifth wedding anniversary this July. She said the only good thing that came out of this marriage was my grandkids. Oh.

Damn. Oh, no. Yeah. Oh. And the funny thing is we actually, we were young when we had our son and then our daughter came a year and a half later. We had them both before

we got married, so it makes it even better. Oh, man. Well, listen, she may not, but I appreciate you. Oh, I appreciate you, and I just bought your book, Bobby. I'm so excited to read it. Thank you very much. It's a real treat. I tell you. That book's a real treat. I can't wait. All right. Yeah, give me a review

after you finish it. Call me back. I will. All right. Bye, bye. Have a good day. Eddie, you got to go. You're the last one. Oh, yeah, man. No, mine are awesome. Eddie and I are awesome. They are. They are great. No, really. Honestly, like mine. So Amy and Eddie had nothing. Zero. Hey, lunchbox, thanks for being honest. That's why you're my boy. That's why you're my boy.

Okay, what do you have to say by my in-laws? Hey, hey, just lunchbox and Bobby's mics are up now. Anything you want to say lunchbox? Man, it feels good to be so awesome. Thanks for being my boy, Bobby. Eric in Kansas. Bobby. What up, buddy? Long time caller, first time listener. Wait, that doesn't make sense, but I appreciate that. All right, what you got for us? You have something for us?

Yeah, I just dropped off my kid headed to work, but just wanted to ask you a question. I'm kind of developing this dad, Bob, that Eddie's always talking about. It's easy to get and even easier to keep. Just one of those people that I've had a high metabolism my whole life, so I don't haven't necessarily needed to work out, you know, and I used to have abs when my fiance and I got together and stuff like that, and she always said that I look good. Well, now that I've developed a little more weight, she says a lot, you know, when I have my shirt off it, you know, I like the weight that you put on or whatever. Well, I'm just wondering,

you know, she really means that or she's just saying that because she loves me, you know what I mean? Like, should I, you know, make a concerted effort to, you know, maybe, drop some of the weight because she used to say that she liked how I look too, so which way is it? Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure. Okay, first of all, she's your fiancee, right? Yes. So she's not going anywhere. So there's that. That's a big factor in the big deal. You do have a wedding, too. And if she's preparing herself for pictures in a wedding, I don't know if she is or not, then it's kind of up to you to also put in the work, just short term. Would you feel like that's a fair to say? Yes, I mean, we just had a baby like four months ago, so, you know.

Okay, I do know. Okay, listen, I would just go, if she likes it and she says she likes it, I'm okay. I don't think women like it. I think that they're... Eddie? My wife says the same thing. I mean, I'm with him. He's speaking my language because my wife says, I like it when you put on a little

weight. I like you a little soft. Maybe she just doesn't want you to have options. And so... Bottom line. I see what you're saying. The worst you look, the less women are... I don't think she's thinking that.

No, that's why I think that's it, because yes. We as married men, we have the, I guess, the luxury of really just letting ourselves go a little bit and being okay with it. Because what are we going to do? We're married. Oh, but heaven forbid the girl let herself go. Right. Also, I will say, she was complimenting you when you had the abs, and she's complimenting you when you don't have the abs. Sounds to me like you have someone pretty awesome that just loves you for who you are.

However, you should take care of yourself. Well, it's because I still have this face, you know what I mean? Yeah. There we go. He's a face you got. Okay, well, be healthy. Take care of yourself. I hear, yeah.

I hear you. I should probably exercise anyway. I just, you know, don't want her to feel like she has to pump me up and things like that and not really mean it. I think she probably is. I think she's just nice. It's either she's pumping you up and doesn't mean it or she wants you to get bigger so other women aren't like, ooh. Oh.

I'm nailing it. That's real-life America. Get out. Everywhere. Hey, as I knew. Yeah, hey, Eric, appreciate you. Everybody. Transmitting across America.

The Bobby Ball Show. Come on, Bob. All right. 80% of couples admit to go in bed at a different time because one of them wants to do this. Amy, take your guess now. Eat. Oh, just see. That's intense.

Sneaky. Yeah, sneaky. Sneaky. Yeah. eat more. Does your husband do that? Because you don't let him eat? No, we go to bed at the same time.

Yeah, but then he probably stayed the way back. Oh, like he gets back up? He sneaks out. No, not eat. Lunchbox? That's easy. Read. Oh, read.

Oh, wow. What? Eddie? Watch a TV show. Hit me. That's too easy. That's too obvious. Never going to get it.

Never going to get it. I'm going to take one caller after this if they get it. And then we'll do Amy's Morning Corny. one of the couple goes, ah, you go to bed, I'm going to stay awake and do this. The never going to get an 80% of couple say, well, we go to bed at different times because one of us does this. Allison and Ohio, you get one shot. Go ahead. Okay, so can I change my answer because I called in and said something else, but Eddie said watch TV.

Yeah, you go ahead. I don't care. You can say whatever you want. Okay. Long you can Google it. Promise me. No, I didn't. Repeat after me.

I? Okay. No, repeat after me. Allison, repeat after me. I? Aye. Allison? Allison?

Well, did not Google answer. Did not Google an answer. Okay, go ahead. Okay. Eat? Oh, Amy said that. Okay, I got it. Oh, my gosh.

I didn't hear her. Yeah, I know. Lunchbox? Social media. Hang out on social media. No, the answer is shop online. Nobody wins. Oh, so that's winning.

Yeah, that's it. That's women. There you go. The morning corny. Who does a mummy take on a date? Who does a mummy take on a date? Oh, any old girl he can dig up. That was the morning corny.

Excellent delivery. Thank you. Thank you. You're getting applause. When you get laughs and applause, that's the best. Excellent delivery this morning. The farther people live from work, the less happy they are. So shorter commutes, happier job.

What's your commute? About seven minutes. Lunchbox? 11 minutes. How'd you guys live next to each other? Yeah, but he's a few stop signs back. Yeah, and you've got to come to a complete stop, and every time that adds 30 seconds. I'm about six minutes, but to be fair, we do drive when there's no one on the road because we wake up so early.

Yeah, like no one on the road. You ever have a long time when you commute? Oh yeah, before my job before this when I was in sales, I was in the car for over an hour on my way to work and home. And sometimes if there was a bad accident, make it an hour and a half. Did you just hate that so much? Oh, it was brutal. I would think all the time. If I just lived right by work, I could sleep 30 minutes longer or I could do this in the morning.

I could do that. I would just be sitting in my car. Shout out to everybody right now. Sitting in their cars, yes. Sitting in their cars in the middle of traffic. Uh-huh. Because we whine about having to wake up at three, four in the morning, but we don't have to sit in traffic. That is true.

So there's that. Doctors are talking about this woman who sweats blood. Yeah. Let me ask you a question. It's not real news. No, no, it's real. It's real. We can't start questioning everything is fake news, by the way.

This is not what this is. This pair of doctors, they have this woman who was hospitalized with a condition where she sweats blood from her face and her hands. Oh, man. Sometimes five minutes at a time. Yeah. Anytime she's in physical activity, it starts to happen. Here's the question. What? You're single. You meet her. You hit it off. You think she's hot. She starts sweating blood. Is that deal breaker? Oh, I am outy 5,000. There is no chance I could date her after that. The first time I saw it, I'd be like, is that always going to happen? Well, it's not you, it's me. And I'm moving on. You're out. I'm out. I'm out.

What about you, Bobby? I think it depends how much we hit it off. Like anything else. Oh, I think you're going to say how much blood. Well, you know. I don't think it's like gushing, but it's like blood beads. It's like sweat comes out of your pores. It would look like red.

That stinks for her, huh? You know what somebody says? Oh, man, that's my worst nightmare. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was thinking of mine. We'll go around the room. Like, what's your worst nightmare? Mine is being stuck in traffic.

And I'm late to a meeting. And I can do nothing about it. That's so nothing. That's your worst nightmare? That's terrible. Oh my gosh. I'm on time everywhere all the time. And if it's like a big meeting or like I have to go and that's my worst nightmare.

It's being helpless. Like I can't even jump out of my car and run. It's my worst nightmare. Not being able to get somewhere on time. Worst nightmare. Maybe. Mine is a spider crawling into my ear and hatching a bunch of baby spiders and then them coming out. Really is.

It's my worst nightmare. It could happen though. It happens to people all the time. the internet. Yeah, fake news. Ledgebikes. My biggest fear is just coming upon a snake when I don't expect it. And it's just lying in wait.

And there I am. And I'm trapped. And it's just me and the snake. And I can't do anything. Or if I, like, get in bed and it's under my sheets. Just anywhere. I have these thoughts all the time about what if I go around that corner and there's a snake? Or I'm walking the dog, mowing the grass.

And here comes a snake. So I don't want to be late. Amy doesn't want spiders and Luxbox doesn't want snakes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Eddie, what is your worst nightmare? Producer Eddie? Mine is a home invasion with maybe like I'm napping or something and I wake up in someone's in my house like stealing my stuff.

I wouldn't know what to do. Oh, that's so scary to me. What would you do? Oh, well, I have baseball bats now. So I'd grab my baseball bat and if the kids were home, I'd tell them to grab theirs. And we'd smack them hard. There you go.

There's stuff back. There's all of our worst nightmare. Ray, what's your worst nightmare? Sleeping in, man, and missing part of the show being late. Yeah. That one I can understand. Whose is the scariest? Mine for sure.

Mine. Yeah. How do we feel about psychics in general? Like, I believe, I'm not going to pay money. I think if somebody's psychic, they're not setting up a house on the side of the road. Yeah. If there's some, listen, I think anyone that's advertised themselves as a psychic is not a psychic. What?

Anybody. Even with a neon sign? I would think that if there's somebody with psychic powers, which I don't have never been seen or shown that there was. They wouldn't have this power to also not have to show people. I agree with you. Waste of money. Oh, I disagree. Oh, I'm not into it. You're into it? I wouldn't say I'm into it, but I think there's something about it because they can tell you stuff that you're just like, wow, and they do it all time. But the one thing I do have a problem with is why don't they tell you, like, okay, there's going to be a fire at this house if they can predict everything. If there were a real psychic,

they wouldn't be telling us they're a real psychic. Do you understand how? They'd be putting a cage. Exactly. Yes, you're crazy. Yes. Police say a psychic and her son cheated an elderly man out of $150,000 bucks. There you go. Because they said they would rid him of evil spirits. Oh, no.

They now face theft at conspiracy charges. He's an old guy and he just kept paying them because they were like, we got... My point is, if someone really was a psychic and they were really able to nail things, you don't think we would take them... It would be like an alien. There would be no unsolved anything. Right, and we would take them and put them somewhere and make them do all the work. and almost jail them for their powers.

The same way we would do an alien if we found an alien around. You don't think we put that thing in a cage? We might have them somewhere. You know what I'm saying? Okay. How you feeling about this? Would you want your husband to wear some sort of engagement ring? Because it's customary for women to.

Totally. Would you want him to be claimed and wear an engagement ring? Yeah, you're next. So if he's proposing to me, then I have to go out and get him. an engagement ring afterwards. If you're engaged, do you both wear an engagement ring? I'm fine with just me wearing it. He doesn't need to wear it.

He doesn't need... I don't need him to wear it to know that he's my fiancé. You know? And then people are going to be like, I'm just picturing my husband handling this. They'd be like, oh, so you're married? No, I'm just engaged. Like, he would not. He would not wear a ring for that.

Connor? Yeah, absolutely. What do you think? You wear one? Oh, absolutely not. I've been engaged for about a year and a half, and I'm getting married next Saturday, and I think it's absolutely dumb to wear one. Oh, so you would not wear an engagement ring. Your fiancé said I would like me to wear an engagement ring, because I'm wearing one. I'd like if you to also wear one to show that you're engaged, you would say no. Absolutely not. Would you dig in and say, because you're saying absolutely. What if it was really important to her?

Well, I think I'd have a lot of married, you know, and nothing's going on my hand until we're married. Wow. But my sister actually got married a few months ago and her fiancee wore one. And I gave him a pretty hard time about it. No, no way. Yeah, sounds like it. So I'm pretty sure he still didn't like me to this day. Connor, appreciate you, buddy.

All right, thank you. Let's go over to Meredith. Meredith in Cedar Rapids. Hey, Bobby. What do you think about this? Would you want your man to wear an engagement ring to? No, not really. My now husband, we just got married.

married a month ago. We had a long engagement for two years. And since we've been married, he's been hit on more times than when we were engaged. Okay. So you're saying the ring brings on the hits. And if you're not married, the hits get equal not getting married. Exactly. Oh, the ladies love him now. I can't keep him off him. Meredith, let me ask you a question. Do you like the dad bod or the fit bod? I like the fit bod, but I don't think my husband knows that because he's starting to go straight to dad bod mode. That's kind of what I think.

Most people, they just don't want to say it. Eddie is just convinced that women love Chubb. No, the world is changing. They love Chub. They love Chub. He's like, if they get to choose, they would choose Chub over abs. Totally. In your mind. Yes. Not about his heart.

All that's out. The goodness is... Softness, not tightness. And you don't think that has anything to do with you? No, I don't know. It's just the world. Oh, okay. Our video editor, Eddie, Dattitude, husband, family man. You gotta do things like deal with the exterminator.

Oh, man, we might have to get rid of our exterminator. You tell me if I should. He's really been good. We've had him for like two years and really no mistakes. But man, he made a critical mistake last time you was here. So you want us to decide if you should fire your exterminator? I don't want to be a part of firing scene. Okay, well, let's hear what happened.

All right. Well, he was working on the house, spraying the house. He went in the backyard and he left the backyard gate open. He took off. He was done with his thing. Coachella, my dog, about an hour later, found out the door was open. Boom, she's gone. So we didn't even realize she was gone.

Lucky for us, like 30 minutes later, I guess somebody found her and they brought her back to the house. Because she was in the backyard. She has a doggie door. So she goes to backyard, free range, whatever. But she found that door wide open and she had a night off, I guess, in the neighborhood. Wow. So now I'm like, that's a big deal. Like, you can't be leaving the back door open.

I feel like exterminators as part of their classes that they did. Their oath they took. Yeah. The exterminator oath. Make sure that backdoor latch is closed completely. So what are you asking? Well, I mean, my wife and I were talking about, we're like, I feel like we should get a new one. That's a pretty lethal mistake.

Let me tell you. Let me drop some real life on you. Okay, okay. One, people screw up. Yes, more than robots. Yes, a lot more than robots, which I say a lot. So here's the thing. If you factor in, one, if something bad, it would happen to the dog, I think it's a different question.

nothing bad happened to the dog in the end what's the final product nothing happened bad we got the dog back you got the dog back okay so that's one

number two is this the first time anything ever bad's happened with this guy yes you've had them for years yes and here's the final question

and I want you to be honest and think to yourself do you ever make mistakes rarely okay I make mistakes I make mistakes those three things factored in the fact that

you make mistakes two the dog wasn't hurt and three he's been doing this for you in a great way for years I think if it happens multiple times then it's probably time for a new one So if he leaves the gate open one more time

You stay something to him Like hey man last time you were here You left the gate open dog got out We're all good and stuff I just want to remind you that Not to leave it Yeah it's an honest mistake And nothing bad happened to the dog

Has that ever happened to you guys I've had people leave the gate open Like when they come to like fix the air condition Yeah Did you fire him? Yes No What I did though as I fixed it automatically, I put a lock on it

because it was my fault. I should have known better than to just leave it. I put it on me. And so that way, when they come and they've got to unlock it, they have to go, hey, I need to unlock this lock. And I'm like, oh, cool, I'm going to unlock it, but remember, I got a dog. Smart. Okay. All right. This guy has one more chance. How about he's just going to come? He's a good guy. We'll let this one slide.

Does anyone disagree with me, by the way? You can. No. A hundred percent agree with you. No, I mean, it's just one little thing, and maybe he doesn't even know you have a dog. Yeah. No, he knows I have a dog Okay Every time he comes in He's like, hey, can't put that dog on?

Bobby, I was going to ask you the same thing Like, what if Bobby just fired us for every mistake we made, Eddie? We'd be out of a job. Day one. You guys would be. Day one. Day one, yeah. I can wrap it up for today.

Thank you so much for listening. On Instagram, I'm Mr. Bobby Bones. You can click and follow. I'll say appreciate you guys being here. Lots of options for you. So the fact that you listen to us, really appreciate that. And if you spend 10 minutes or five hours, we appreciate that.

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