The Bobby Bones Show - Bobby gets Catfished+ Song Lyrics That Don't Make Sense + The Knock Knock Joke Off

Episode Date: December 19, 2017

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Redfin helps turn saved listings into real addresses. Get started at Redfin.com. Own the dream. Hey, Alex, you there? Yes. Hey, so Alex's on the phone. She works at Rescue Road in Little Rock, which is an animal shelter, right? It's a foster-based rescue.

We don't actually have a shelter. Okay, so I don't even know, I guess I don't know the difference. The shelter would be, like, if it's a built place for exactly that? Yes. Okay. Yeah, so we have shelter partners. So we partner with West Memphis, Kime Bluff, Hazen, and Stuttgart shelters,

and we pulled from those shelters and put them in foster families in central Arkansas. So why I brought her on is they had a dog and the dog had a bunch of puppies, right? Yes. And you named all the puppies after people on the show? Yes. Yeah, they ate puppies.

It's so cute. A puppies. Yeah, so we ended up having a ton of girls so we had to dig into the raging idiot school a little bit. We have a Nakeda and Natalie. Yeah. But we only had two boys, Bobby and Eddie. They have an Amy, a Morgan 1, a Morgan number two, a Hillary the phone screener,

Nikita and Natalie from The Raging Idiots, and then two boys, Bobby and Eddie. What in the world? I mean, not to be rude, but do you realize that I'm bigger than Eddie? I mean, you could have been a girl, but we thought you might not like that. No, no, no. You put Eddie, you named a dog over Eddie over lunchbox. Like, I am more important. than Eddie to this show and I've been here longer.

I don't know what show you're listening to, but you've lost your mind. Hey, you're lucky. Oh my goodness. I am not promoting your adoptions. Okay, good, because I am. Hey, Alex. Alex is on from Rescue Road in Loder Rock.

So, eight puppies, they live streamed the births on Facebook, by the way. And if people want to rescue these dogs, if they want to check them out, what's your Facebook page? Rescue Road. That's it. Just Rescue Road. Yep.

Okay, find out more rescue road. Well, good luck with all the puppies. Appreciate what you're doing. Thank you. And lunchbox isn't happy. I mean... We figured he wouldn't be, but that's okay. That's why he did it, just to troll love it.

Yeah, yeah. All right, thank you very much. Alex, have a great morning. Thank you, you too. All right, bye-bye. Tell a little Bobby and little Eddie, we say hello. Aw. It's not funny.

A little Hillary the phone screen. Recognizing people doing cool things. It's ICU. So this guy named Pete was out walking his dog. when she started chewing on something and he pulled the empty cigarette pack out of her mouth. But then she collapsed. So he takes it to the vet hospital in Boston and realize the dog had overdosed on basically a painkiller. That was inside the cigarette pack?

Yes. They gave her Narcan, which people that have overdoses that can revive her. Luckily, they were able to see this in the dog's eyes. Oh, my goodness. Because it looked like the human eyes whenever they overdose. Yeah. And so the doctors saved the dog. But it's crazy

I guess that's what people have put on their pills in the bottom of cigarette bags Oh Is I hide it? I guess if you have to hide it But yeah Shout out to the

Bougar vet hospital For saving the dog Whenever that happened So I see you to you guys I see you That was I see you The Bobby Bones show The Bobby Bones

Bobby Bones I'm always interested In what Eddie's kids Can and can't say What's considered a bad word What isn't? Yeah Because they can't say

The word stupid Which makes sense No. Yes, it does. Thank you, Amy. Okay. But again, this is me. But they've started to go around the house saying what?

So long, sucker. I love that, though. That's funny. I'm like downstairs eating dinner and I hear them chasing each other around the house. And the little one goes, so long, sucker. And he hits him with like a bat or something. And I was like, no, no, no, no, no, no. What is going on here?

You can't say that. And my wife was like, oh, they can't. They've been saying it for like weeks. And I don't know where they got it from. The little one has no idea where he learned it from, but they say it. And they can't? Oh, I said no. That is inappropriate.

You do not say so long sucka, then hit him with a sword. Why can't you say so long, sucka? It's the sucker. He can say so long whatever they want. But that means sucker. Right? Which is a bad thing. What?

A sucker? A sucker's an idiot. Come on, let's be real. It's like there's a sucker in every room. I don't want my three-year-old calling. people's sucker. Like, I don't. I know he's calling a sucker. Yeah.

Sucka. Like, no, don't be, don't get me wrong. I laughed. It makes me laugh when they say stuff like that. I mean, but I was with you on the stupid thing, but suckers taking a little too far. Too far. Parenting, too far. I think I'm there to let them know that, whoa,

like, that's, that, okay, that could fly at the house, but what are there at school and they're like, so long, suck under the teacher. And the team's like, whoa, whoa, whoa. Can it fly at the house? It doesn't sound like it can. No, it doesn't. That's what I'm saying. I got to stop it at the house. Do you pop them? No, not for Sucka.

Both they do it again. I'll warn them again, and then they keep doing it, yeah, it's popping time. Where do you think they learned it? Either another kid at school or some TV show or some movie. Does cartoons say stuff like that? All the time. It was probably like some, you know, Ninja Turtle movie, because those Ninja Turtles, they say a lot of stuff like that. Man, you're such a helicopter, like over-daring-

So long, Sucka. I just... I'm telling you, I think it's hilarious, but no, I've got to be the parent, and I I got to put my foot down. So long. It's like, Ah. This is the Bobby Boys.

Bubba-Bap-Bap-Dub-Bah-Bap-A-Bap-A-B-Too-Tis. Tuesday's good news starts right now. Tell me something good. All right, shall I go first? Lynn Nelson in Massachusetts. She bought a scratch-off lottery ticket. It's called the hit $1,000 game. She didn't know she was going to hit it, but she hit it.

She won $1 million. Like, bam, bam. Wow. She's splitting the prize. with her five coworkers. That's nice. She's like, we all work together. Yeah, that's like us.

Yeah. Except we'd never see lunchbox again. Yep, I'd be out. I'd be 5,000. I'd probably buy you guys a little something. Not enough I'm splitting it straight up. She's splitting with the co-workers. She said, we've all worked together

and spent our lives together for so long. Yeah. Splitting it. Yeah, good for her. Selfless. Amy? Well, a Rhode Island cop hand delivered a little girl's favorite stuffed animal

after she left it at a park. Yeah, her little favorite puppy, Bubbles, left at a park. So her aunt posted on Facebook that Bubbles was lost and missing. And if anyone found it to just leave it at the playground, well, they didn't know that the officer had found Bubbles. And he didn't just leave it to the park. He drove it to their house, delivered bubbles, safe and sound. Lunchbox?

Kevin Hayes was pulling into his neighborhood down in San Antonio, and he's driving. He's like, whoa, there's some black smoke. And he, whoa, he drives up and the house is on fire. So he runs to the front door, bangs on the front door. bangs on the front door and gets a mom and three kids out and the fire had spread to the neighbor's house. He went next door, called his neighbor, didn't answer. And he goes, I'm not home. Or he answered and said, I'm not home, but my dog's in there. Kevin bust down the door, saves the dog. Boom. So he

saved a mom, three kids and a dog. Woo! That's two houses he saved. That's what I'm talking about, Kevin. Yeah. Kevin, shout out. Kevin got a lot of shout-outs. That a boy. All right. Tell me something good. Get your bones on Bobby Bones show. I think lunchbox kind of has an argument here because a lot of emails go out around the office and are like, hey, we're having an office party at 4 p.m. for everybody in the office. And I see them and I'm like, well, that's unfortunate for us. I just feel left out because they have ice cream party. They have all these fun events at 4 p.m. Why don't they every once in a while throw us a bone and do one at 10 a.m.?

Hey, we're having a pancake party in the upstairs kitchen. Everybody come because we want to feel like we're part of the. office and when it goes out and says four o'clock, they know that we're not going to be here, and they do it all the time. They have multiple parties a week. And I feel like happy hour, like beer cart Friday. Yes, the worst is when they give half days. And they're like, everybody can work until noon, then go home.

Oh, okay. Thank you. We're already, we go home at noon. Or at 7 a.m. They're like, ooh, the roads are terrible. Stay home. Stay home. Do not come in.

Well, we're already at work. And so I just feel like, man, it would be so awesome if we got included in some of those. and they threw them in the morning so we could be, we could take part because I want to feel like part of the team because I like everybody that works here. Do you? Here's the thing, though.

You have to stop responding to these emails sent to the whole building as the spokesperson of the show because you're not. Oh, I did that though. One time though. No, more than once. Yeah, he's always like, we as a show would like for everyone to know.

No, no, no. You aren't. And he's like, thank you very much for your time. We appreciate, like he's like oddly nice. the email, even though he's a nice guy, but it's like over the top. Because I'm speaking for the show. As a representative of the show, you have to be extra nice. And I would love to be part of the ice cream party or pancake party or French

toast party. They have French toast party? Well, no, I'm saying they can have that before. Oh, man. That's like, okay. I think it's a fair argument that one out of five they have that we can go to. Yeah. We go to none of them.

And they have like the office Christmas party, and they'll do it at 4 p.m. because they're like, I'll let people out of work early. and we're going to work early. We got to, wait, we could come back up here. Fair argument. Please stop replying all as the spokesperson for this show. The spokesman for the show is Morgan, our producer. Yeah, but she's not on it.

She doesn't feel left out, I guess. She don't want to be part of the party. I wanted to, so I wanted to speak up for the show. Okay, well, thank you very much. Lobby Bone Show. Boney, up the day. This story comes to us from Chicago, Illinois. A 19-year-old man bust into a business at 6 a.m.

two people work and he pulls out a gun says, give me your wallets, give me your phone. They hand over their stuff, he goes to put the gun back in his waistband and boom! Shot himself right in the... What? Yeah. And so does he try to run away? Oh, no, no, no.

He asked him to call 911. Oh, no. Oh, I'm lunchbox, that's your bonehead story of the day. How humiliating. Bobby Bones. Bobby Bones show. So, we're going to do a knock-knock joke tournament and winner moves on. First up, producer Raymond versus me.

Winner moves on. Producer Raymond, are you ready? Mm-hmm. All right, hit me with that joke. All right, knock, knock. Who's there? The. The Who?

It's a great band, isn't it? I like it. Amy, name won the Who song. Yeah, they played the Super Bowl. Okay, eight years ago, stop it. Okay, okay, okay, my turn, my turn. Knock knock Who's there?

No, Ray's got to do it. Oh, yeah, yeah. Knock, knock. Who's there? Daisy. Daisy who? Daisy, me rolling. They hate it.

Oh, he had music. Wow. Most has music. There are no rules. Ray, you should have been in a clip of the Who. Okay, okay. Morgan number two, who's the winner? I'm going to have to go with you, Bobby.

Oh, great. Thank you very much. Daisy me rolling. Baby, baby. All right, next up, round number two, Amy versus Lunchbox. You will do each other's who's there. Okay, lunchbox, go ahead. Oh, you want me to go first?

Go ahead, lunchbox. Knock, knock. Who's there? Smell mop. Smell my poo. Gross. No thanks. Oh, boy. Oh, goodness.

He loved that. Amy loved it too. Yeah. Okay. Amy, go ahead. Knock knock. Who's there? Joe.

Joe who? Joe Mama. Okay. No way. They're the weakest here. Joe Mama? That's awesome. Are you joking?

Wait, what? Bobby? Sorry if you didn't have clips Okay Morgan number two Pick the winner of those two Yeah, Joe Mom Yeah, that's a little hard

But I'm gonna have to go with lunchbox Yeah What? Moving on Are you joking? Hey, good to smell my poo She must like that poo humor

Yeah That must be her type of Okay Okay, so we'll come back For the championship round We play the song And it's Lunchbox Versus me

Is that right? That's it Damn! Oh boy Okay, lunchbox And by the way The judges are now Amy and Raymond. They're in the judging too.

Great, I already are. The Bobby Bowie Show. National Knock Knock Championship's of today. The final two competitors are lunchbox to myself. Lunchbox, you're up. Go ahead. Knock knock. Who is there?

Cows go. Cows go who? No, you fool. Cows go. Moo. Wow. Wow. Yeah.

Yeah. Okay. Okay. Woo! Is that one over your head? You didn't get it or what? Oh, come on. I'm over it.

I mean, you were like stunned. You're like, wait, I don't get it. Oh, Cal is not. Oh, got it. Okay. I'm ready. Do I get to go two, do you do two jokes in the final round? No, just one.

Oh, okay, because I had another one. Yeah, you didn't think it was good either, huh? No, I have one. Yeah. Now he's begging for another one. Let's go. I have another one. Go ahead.

Knock, knock, knock. Who's there? Adore. Adore who? A door is between us Open up What? Oh my goodness

That one's over your head All right That's good Our judges Morgan number two Man I don't know what it is I think lunchbox is making me laugh

I'm going to go with lunch What? What? Nobody even laughed at it is No one laughed at your No one laughed at all Amy I liked your delivery

I'm going with, a door is between us. Open up. One to one. Open up. Raymond, final call on the championship here. I got to go bones. I've heard lunchboxes like 10 times. Yeah.

Thank you very much. You guys are such wimps. Let me tell you. You guys are scared to vote against your boss. I mean, that was probably the... Oh, come on. That was probably the worst joke in the whole competition, and you gave him the championship on it.

Oh, my goodness. Victory lap. Okay, go. Amy, knock, knock. Who's there? Dozen. Does anybody want to open? I'll let me in.

It's cold out here. Doesn't. Oh, does anybody? Okay. See, that's what I'm saying. You guys gave that the championship. No, that was a victory laugh. Hey, don't vote on that one.

Yeah. I already won. Lunchbox, give us your extra one. Oh, you want my? Oh, yeah. You ready? Knock, knock. Go ahead.

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Oh, my goodness. Who's there? I eat mop. No No.

Don't say it. That's funny. No, it's the same joke. It's the same joke as the last one. It is? Yeah, it is, Amy. It's a poo joke. It's another poo joke.

I eat my poo. Oh, gross, man. That's way too much information. Oh, my God. Who's there? Spell. Spell. Spell who?

Okay. W-H-O. Knock knock Raymond, do you have one that he didn't use? Oh yeah, right here. You ready? Knock, knock. Who's there?

Amos. Amos who? A mosquito. Amosquito. All right, we're drunk. Amosquito. I miss Amosquito. It's the Bobby Bones show.

All right, we'll try a segment where we just answer the phone before anyone in the classroom. Hello? Who's this? This is Missy What up? Hey This is Bobby

How did you answer the phone? Well, because there's nobody in the glass room right now And so we were on the air And I just thought, let me just see who's calling in Why not? You know what I mean? That's amazing Yeah, where do you live?

I live up in Maine And I work in New Hampshire So right now I'm traveling between both states Oh, well, thank you very much Yeah, obviously, I just picked up the phone here So I don't know what you're going to say Sometimes I have an idea of what you're going to say But what are you going to say here

I'm glad you called I wanted to call in because my 11-year-old son is in sixth grade. And just last night, he finished reading your book. And it was the first, like, book that he's read on his own, like, without somebody kind of prepping him, aside from the Diary of the Wimpy Kids series. Wow. Like, I'm second behind Diary of Wimpy Kid. That's pretty awesome. Yeah, I thought you.

Do you like the book? He loved the book. He kept, he wouldn't put it down. nobody had to kind of remind him to keep reading. He just, he went through it in maybe like a week. And he said he could see pictures in his mind. I think it really helps him that he really follows your show and you guys and he could hear your voice. Wow.

Well, tell him, I said, thank you for, I'll tell you what, I'll put you on hold. I'll send him a signed copy. I know he already has a book, but I'll sign him a copy and send it to him that way you can have it if he enjoyed it that much. Maybe that's cool for him. That is so cool. That is going to change. that is going to change his life as a reader. Okay, cool. Hold on a minute. Don't hang up, okay?

Okay. Okay. Hey, I put her on hold. Will you make sure that... Ray, you never remember. Just make sure she doesn't hang up. Hey, Misty. Yeah. If they hang up on you, call back. Because I know how this little operation works around here. So just hang on the phone and if for some reason hang up on you, call back, okay? Okay. I can't believe I talk to you. I mean, it's not that big... I mean, it's a little lower rated. But I'm glad you called in. Hey, I appreciate you, by the way. So thank you.

Okay, don't hang up. By the way, I wrote a book called Bare Bones. I mean, it was just four times in New York Times bestseller. But it didn't matter. Available on Amazon. Available on Amazon. But I'm working on the second one right now. It's not going to be out until like summer or next year.

So it's not even like. Oh, wow. What about the advanced copy that we get to read? There's no such thing. What? There's going to be stuff that blows you away. What does that mean? It's not about you.

Don't start thinking I'm writing about you. I didn't even think that. But I was like, what does that mean? We're going to get blown away. Like, I feel like we know most everything about you and what you have to say. You do, don't you? Okay, cool, cool, cool. And now a message from the dirty corner of the table.

From Lunchbox. Lunchbox, go ahead. I just wanted to let you guys know, Amy, Bobby, anyone else. I am not your secretary. Like, I understand that I work on the show and I have an email address, but I am not here to answer your emails. If you could tell people, just, they email me all the time trying to get a hold of you guys. Like, hey, I know you don't get emails.

So can you send this to Bobby? because he'll read it if it's from you. And I'm like, I don't have time. Oh, you don't? To go through all the, I get them dozens at a time. Wow. Dozens? Well, in a time?

Wow. Because they're like, oh, you know, I said this to Bobby, but I know he gets hundreds and hundreds of emails. Or Amy's really busy and she doesn't have time to check her email all that often. So can you make sure she sees this? I am not a secretary. I, that is not my job. Morgan is the producer of the show. If you want to email.

Who are you yelling at? I've done nothing in this. Well, you can maybe... He's yelling at the dozens of people to email at the time. All dozens of you. Are you yelling at the listener? Yeah, I'm yelling at the listener also. Like, people, I am not here to answer emails for Bobby and Amy.

If you want to email them, email them. Don't send me your complaints or whatever you need to get a hold of them for. No complaints. Oh, are people complaining about us? Well, like one was like a pimping joy shirt wasn't fitting right or something and wanted to know if she could exchange it. Well, I guess she emailed Amy but didn't hear back, so it's my responsibility to go to Amy and get a response. Hey, we'll take a breath, buddy. No, you know what I usually do with those emails?

No. What? Delete. Oh, that's how you enjoy? Delete. That's the opposite of Pimp and Joy. Hey, it's the opposite of I'm not Bobby and I'm not Amy, so I don't care. I did get that email, however, and I will say it was a question about the shirt fit fine, but she was scared to wash it, the tank top, the new Pimp and Joy stars tank top.

She's like, if I wash it, is it going to shrink a little because it fits perfect? I'm like, nope, everything's pre-washed. You're good to go. Wash it, dry it. You're all good. There you go. Well, last box, sorry that you're having to go through these dozens of emails. Yeah, if I wanted to be a secretary, I'd go to an office and apply for a secretary spot.

That's not me. Good. I think it's now called like administrative assistant. Yeah, which is dumb too. It's called a secretary. That's what they are. No. My mom was one for 20 years and she transitioned from secretary to administrative.

Did she do the same job? Yeah, but she had a lot of real. Why are you yelling? I'm just so annoyed by these emails. Ray, why is he so angry? He was angry. Man. It's funny how long we hold on to things.

Our producer, Eddie, has that a credit card for 14 years, the same credit card? You got a new one? Since college. I had the same credit card since college, and I finally got a new credit card that I've been waiting for. It's the Southwest credit card. 14 years. Man, what kind of interest were you paying on an old card?

Really nothing. It was just kind of, it was really, really low because I was a, I had seniority for that card. And I feel like I didn't really want to stop using it. And it's not like I just said, I'm going to like tear it up and I'm never used it again. I'm going to keep it, but I'm not using it anymore. And me and my wife decided that we're moving on to a new card. Like that dollar bill, like the first dollar bill you make it your business.

Exactly. So around the room, what do you have that you still use that you're like, you should probably give up? Like for me, I have headphones that are almost 20 years old. And surgically, we've kept them together with tape. I mean, at least once a year Eddie and I go through and rebuild them. I just will not let them go. I've had them for almost 20 years.

And they don't even sound that good, I don't think. It's just the sound I'm comfortable with. So I've had these headphones for almost 20 years. Amy, what have you had for a long time? I have a pair of gap boxers that are pink with blue polka dots that I've had since probably my freshman year of high school and they have holes in them.

And I still have them, which is amazing. and I still wear them. And when I put them on, I'm like, oh, why do I still? I mean, the holes just keep getting bigger and bigger, but I'm like, these are amazing and I don't ever want to get rid of them. Watchbox? I have a Discover card from the year of 1999, my freshman year of college. And I also have a pair of jeans from the Gap outlet,

the summer of 2000 with the seams going down the front, wearing them today, still in great shape, still kicking it. Wow, you have a pair of 17-year-old jeans on today? Yep, look at them, Eddie's seam right down the front. Yeah, they're definitely 17 years old. Yeah. Got my the outlet. Do they look old, like cool, old?

No, no, no. They don't even look old. You just can tell from the style that that's from like a long time ago. Yeah, and you can tell they were at the outlet because sometimes there's a factory like or a mistake. Melfunx or some sort of like. Oh, you got the old sewing machine air pants. Yes, yes, yes.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, good on you for keeping them though. Ten bucks. How often do you wear them a week? Oh, two or three times a week. Wow. Look at this guy over here. Nobody even notices.

Have a game for you guys. So you'll go back and forth. Amy and Lunchbox. If you miss it, you're out. Okay. All right. I'll give you three names of characters on TV shows. Oh, boy.

Yeah, you name the TV show. I like it because I like TV. I'm going to go with you Lunchbox first. Oh, boy. Rachel, Monica, Joey. Oh, that's my new jam. Friends. Are you still watching that?

Yeah, I still watching our reruns. But the problem is, I don't watch it. it every day so I miss a few episodes which I don't like. Do you have Netflix though? Yeah, it's all there. That's a lot of commitment. That's like 25 seasons. Yeah, you can watch a couple and just stay in order though. Okay. Amy. Yes. Jesse, Hank, Skyler. Um, Breaking Bad. Nice. Boom! Good one. Good one. I know his full house at first. Leonard Howard Penny. Oh, that's your show. Big Bang Theory.

Nice. Yeah. Never seen it. Well, I've seen it, but it's terrible. I'm naming three characters from a TV show. Ted. Robin Marshall. Amy.

How I Met Your Mother. Wow! Oh, Robin Trubinsky. Dang. Lunchbox. Yeah. Carol. Carl.

Maggie. Carol? Carl Maggie Carl Maggie Oh, growing pains No

Hit me Amy Walking Dead Correct for the win Woo Feels good I can't wait for it to come back I know

I think it's October 22nd I love Walking Dead Don't vote me If I would have said John Aria Todd You want to get Game of Thrones

Right No Even if I would have said the weird names? No, because, wow, I don't know. I would have got Aria. Would you? Because I was going to give that to you about that game of those was too hard. You were going to yell at me, so I didn't.

My sister named her dog Aria after Game of Thrones. Oh, wow. How about this, lunchbox? Quinn, Huck, and Olivia. Oh, that's your one that you guys like, the lawyer one. Olivia Pope. Yeah. Amy, you're the one of those.

Congratulations. There we go. But I wouldn't yell to you is too hard if I got it wrong. Walking dead. That's too hard. No, it's not. It's like the biggest shit. Stop it. Body bones, y'all. The Morning Corny.

What do you get when you throw a lot of books into the ocean? What do you get when you throw a lot of books into the ocean? A tidal wave. That was the morning corny. The Bobby Ball Show So I'm going to tell you a story And then we're going to do I felt stupid win

Okay, blank So I was at the gym on Saturday And I was feeling low down Because I have whatever little illness this is And I wasn't really feeling like I was pumped I was going as hard as I normally do And I was on the treadmill

And he had me doing bear crawls on the treadmill Which means you're on the treadmill as it's going. And he went up and up and up, and all of a sudden I couldn't do it anymore. And so I just jumped, fell in the fetal position and got shot off the treadmill

in front of everybody. Probably flew three feet. Because I was on like five, and I was going, you're like that Taylor Swift commercial. Yes, I was, except I was, and so instead I just turned over on my shoulder,

brace my head, and it shot me off the treadmill, and everybody looked and kind of laughed at me. So I felt pretty stupid. I felt stupid When Now, if you'd like to call

and share one of those I'd love for you two And if nobody does I'll just feel stupid alone as usual That happened though I didn't get injured I'm sore Thank goodness

I landed on my shoulder Oh I brace for impact Pretty solid I cover my head But it's a And everybody looked and laughed I was on the treadmill And I was on the treadmill

And I felt stupid Tiffany in Ohio What'd you do? I was coaching a cheer clinic and I hopped up on to the stage to show the girls some of my some of the emotions for the choreography that we were doing and I, they had their papers scattered across the stage and I took a step back and went flying off of the stage, fell off in front of the entire school basketball team, cheerleaders, parents, coaches, broke my wrist. And all of the girls, the cheerleaders, had to carry me, help carry me through the car. Oh, no. So you slipped on paper.

I did. Oh. That's a real thing. Oh, no. It was awful. And I never broke in a bone until I was an adult. Dang. Welcome to adulthood.

Dang, Tiffany. Thank you for the call. Appreciate you. Hey, Sarah, in Kansas. Yes. You're on the air. Go ahead. I was running late and I felt up the stairs.

I thought I was by myself. but I turned around and the owner of our company was there. You fell up the stairs? Yeah, like I tripped, like my foot slipped and I fell kind of up the stairs. And it turned around and there was the company, our boss. Maybe they see you as more human now. That's how I look at it.

And I mess up people go, oh, he's more human. He's not perfect as everybody said, because everybody's saying that. Yeah, nobody says that. No, all right, all right. Hey, you're on the air. Hello, what's happening? Hello, I just had one of the Eiffel stupid stories for Bobby.

Yeah, go ahead. It's Bobby right now. How are you? Hi, I'm good. Thank you. How are you? I'm good. Thank you for calling. Sharing's throw with me. Well, this one's going to know, like Bobby felt great because it's another treadmill story. But I was on a treadmill at the gym next to my son, who's an athletic teenager, and I was trying to be cool. And I couldn't figure out why he was going faster than me. So I lean over where I'm running to look and see what his was set on, and I hit the edge. shot off the back. Oh man, that stinks.

Haunting it pretended like he didn't know me. Oh, no. He just ignored it. He looked back and I wasn't hurt, but he looked back and laughed and just kept running. That stinks and it's funny and I appreciate you. I appreciate you guys too. You make you laugh every morning. Thank you very much. Oh, Laura, last one in Houston. Go ahead. I fell down some stairs while playing Pokemon Go. Oh, no. You were looking at your phone?

Yes, it was dark And you were playing Pokemon, you know The double. Yes. Man, and so are you okay? Yeah, it was like two years ago. Okay, good. Because yesterday I've been like,

you still playing Pokemon Go? But I appreciate you. Amy, you have one? I was trying to think of one and probably the most recent thing that happened to me was that yoga. We were supposed to like say what we were grateful for,

but I missed the part where the teacher said say it quietly to yourself. Oh, no. Oh, no. You said it out loud? And I said it out loud. So they're like, say it quiet. So you go, I'm grateful for, you know, what the Lord has given me him all my life.

But instead you went, I'm grateful. Yeah, I was like, grateful of her family. And everyone else is like, I mean, luckily every's eyes are closed. I don't even know if they knew I said it. Oh, they knew. Yeah, yeah. Get your bones on Bobby Ponds show. I don't know whether to be insulted or to feel like it's a huge compliment.

But there's somebody who is using. me as catfish bait online. If you go to my Twitter, Sam, Peoria, Illinois, is looking for a date. It's me, it's my picture. They're using my picture with my dog. They're tricking people. And I think it's Tinder?

Hey, Morgan number two, you're a kid. What's this app? That's Tinder? I mean, yeah. I can see how you're torn. Is this a compliment or is it weird? The problem is they have this dude list that's 42. I'm five years away from that.

That's an insult. Granted, I have a beard A lot older there in a picture. But yeah, I'm being using catfish bait there. What do you think about the girl, though? Like, whoever's falling for it. Do you feel bad for them?

You know, I try not to get too invested in fictional stories. Yeah. I can't control that. You know how many times I've fallen for a fake? Because someone's going to think it's you and they're going to meet this Sam guy and be like, oh, great.

Yeah, if you ever shows up. Yeah, I don't think you ever show up. But I'm being used as catfish bait, which is kind of exciting. That means, like, it's kind of a compliment. You kind of made it, yeah. Like one time, I told you, I went and I donated a bunch of clothes, and it was, it's called Abilities Unlimited.

But it's basically a, they have a lot, where you give, donate clothes. Clothing drive? Like a, like a thrift shop. Give me a brand of one. Goodwill. Goodwill, great. Where I grew up, it was abilities unlimited.

Salvation Army. Thank you. So we had, and so what they would do at abilities. Unlimited was people that they would give them jobs, just like Goodwill and Salvation Army. And I donated a bunch of clothes and some of my clothes made the mannequin up front. Oh, that's, that's a compliment. I was like, that's cool. The shirt I gave it, they used this one.

Yeah. And that means you were built like the mannequin too. No. Oh, no. That's like an icon. I was like, I don't know my brain is. I couldn't remember Goodwill. Yeah.

I was like, I don't. We got you after two minutes. I'm over here throwing out the most obscure one ever, ability is unlimited. No one's ever heard of. And I can't think of goodwill. Well seemed so easy. I was like, what is he looking for?

What's that a store called though that's blue kind of? And it's like, it's like a walrus or something. A Walmart. That's it. What? Wall-Rour.

Okay. Are you on medicine again? No. A walrus. Like, how do I forget Walmart? I got it. I get it. I get it.

I get it. I'm such an idiot. But yeah. It's really big. They sell everything. That thing, like you throw a bow and arrow at it. It's like a target.

It's like a target. What's that store? Oh, yeah. Target. No, you're talking about Walgreens. Bobby Bones The Bobby Bones show So you're trying to give your dog a bath?

Yeah, it's really, really annoying because she does not like it at all. She's a big dog. She's a big Rottweiler. Yes. And I have this stand-up shower now, which is making it, like you take the nozzle off

and you can, so it's getting way easier to bathe her at home. We don't have to take her somewhere. So I saw this tip online of what you can do if your dog is like going, crazy. You put peanut butter, like on the floor of the bathtub or the shower, wherever you are, wherever you're bathing them. Put a big old thing of peanut butter. Then they get so preoccupied

with the peanut butter and like looking at and getting stuck in their mouth and stuff, they don't realize that you're bathing them and then boom. Next thing you know, your dog has a bath and they're all happy because they got peanut butter. I do feel like that's, first of all, genius. Whoever did that. But secondly, I feel like we can do that with lunchbox. To get everything? Yeah. We walk them into the room What would we use, though?

We pour like some beer, done. A glass of beer. But dogs do get distracted by peanut butter because I use it with my dogs whenever I need to give them pills just put peanut butter in there. They just lick it all up and eat the pills.

You can put peanut butter on the bathtub, I'd lick it. Would you eat peanut butter on bathtub? Yeah. I love peanut butter. I don't. You hate it, bones. I hate peanut butter.

Peanut butter and mayonnaise. Two things I do not do. I like both of the things. but just not on the shower floor. What do you not like? Olives and pickles. I like both of those. You?

Easy. Manehs and tomatoes. Yeah, I like tomatoes. Eddie? Avocados. What? What? I'm telling you.

I thought they were avocados. Avocados. But do you like guacamole? No. Eddie, but you're Mexican. I know, dude. My family makes fun of me, but I hate it. Is it the texture?

Yes, it's the texture. I don't want it. Interesting. That's a nice little, what they call a life hack. Put peanut butter on the bottom of the shower. But clean it up afterwards. I don't like living it. I don't care what you.

Do what you live your life. I don't know. The Bobby Bones. Bobby Mowler show. So Eddie, our video producer, got into a fight with the pizza guy. Do you guys how about this? Oh, goodness. Oh, dear.

It wasn't much of a fight. I was shocked. The weird thing is, you love pizza so much. It's got to be a big deal for you to fight with the pizza guy. I do. And we order pizza every week. And so it was just so weird. Like it was the same place that I go to.

And I was on the phone with a guy and I said, hey, well, you add some extra of Parmesan cheese because that's what we like on our pizza, the stinky feet cheese. And he goes, no, we don't do that anymore.

The company has lost millions doing that. So we're not going to give out Parmesan cheese anymore. I'm like, the company's lost millions giving out. That's like same salt and pepper. We can't give you salt and pepper anymore. So he's like, sorry. And so I hung up the phone.

Like, I told my wife, would you believe that? Thought about it for a second. I said, no, I'm calling this guy back. Like, This can not be possible.

So you called back. Did he answer again? No, the manager answered. And I go, hey, man, the guy I just talked to said, you guys aren't giving Parmesan cheese anymore. Is that true? He's like, no. That's unbelievable. Did he really say that?

And I said, yes. He goes, man, I'm so sorry about that. I will send you all the Parmesan cheese you want. And I'll give you a free pizza. Yeah, dude, he gave me a free pizza. How cool is that? And a bunch of Parmesan cheese. I could fill up a whole jar with a cheesy game.

I wonder why that other guy said. that to you. He just didn't want to look for the Parmesan cheese. Probably had a bad day. But I was like, do this dude just lied to me? Yeah, you said the companies. Maybe that memo hadn't reached the manager yet. Maybe he had checked his email. Does anyone else feel like Eddie the Taddlell?

Yes. On the guy? You called me. Like over Parmesan cheese, you're going to call that and get that. What did that guy lost his job? I didn't even think about that, Bobby. I won't say the restaurant, but Sean, you should be a shame yourself. You start up lied to me, dude.

Wasn't a mom and pop place? No, it was a chain. So it was probably somebody. A chain that's lost millions of dollars giving white cheese. Honestly, though, Eddie, I could see like giving out extra condiments and stuff that really adds up. And what if you really read online? There was a million things. He was doing something good for the company.

I think the manager would have known. And keeping prices down for all of us. Yeah. Oh, what if that's the future CEO? Because he is like monitoring. He's doing undercover boss? Dang. This just got serious.

Eddie told on the pizza guy. You are such a little. Such a little tattle-tow. But that manager, shout out. And you got a free pizza. And you got three pizzas. Like, this is why I can't stay skinny. Well, that's because you have two boys.

Yeah. And listen, I get it. I don't think you just go out and just eat a bunch of bad food. I think your lifestyle is that of you have two boys and they want to be fed now and they want to be fed. Exactly. And it's a little more difficult to eat healthy when you're you. Thank you. But do you finally understand.

But do you really want it and you don't. Of course I want to be healthy. But when there's mac and cheese on the stove top, I got to eat it. You don't got to do anything. Jake Owen has a podcast now And I'd like to play a little bit of for you It's Jake Owen's Good Company podcast, right? I believe you can just search Jake Owen

On iTunes or IHartRadio or Good Company podcast, you know Find out what exactly you search for this. Good company? Okay. It's called Good Company with Jake Owen. Here we go. Here's Jake. talking about his very first podcast.

What's up, everybody? It's Jake here on Good Company with the Good Company podcast where we talk to all kinds of folks from family members to friends to people that have influenced me throughout my life. And with this being the first podcast that I've ever put out, I thought there's no better person than my best friend, Jared, who is my twin brother. So as twin brother and then Marty Fish, special tennis player, they grew up together, right? Your mom was so mad. Sally was so mad about that. What about the time we shot the lady in the leg with a BB gun, dude?

There's no way I could have shot that shot 3,000 times. Never got that lady. So, again, this is Jake Owen's podcast. Everybody should download it. It's like 40 minutes, right? It's called Good Company with Jake Owen. We want to really focus good company around hanging out with good people, the people that make me laugh, as you heard on that one.

I mean, we just were laughing. We could go on for days and days with the stories. We'll go from there. We've got lots of cool people that are friends of mine that will be on the show. Again, they shot a lady with a BB gun. And you should listen to this. Good company with Jake Owen. Search for that.

Hey, Joe. Hey, good morning. You good, dude? Yeah, I'm good. We're talking about songs and lyrics and songs where you're like, that doesn't quite make sense. What do you got? Well, Aaron Watson has got a song out right now. out of style.

This is a really good song. I really like it. But in the first verse, he says something like FM 109 on my FM radio. And I got to think, I'm like, pretty sure FM radio only goes up to like 107. It does.

It goes to 107.9, I believe. That's funny. You know why I think that is? It's because if he mentions an FM dial number, and it's like 555. You don't put it in it because it can't be a real one. Okay. If he puts a real one in their stations are going to get upset.

Oh, gotcha. Did that make sense, Joe? Yeah, that's why you're the lead man, Bobby. It's funny that you picked that out, because that's a really smart thing to pick out, but I would believe that's the reason to put that line in there, so a station's 98 on the dial doesn't get upset.

You know what I mean? I gotcha. Radio gets upset about everything. Like when Kip was in, Kip Moore came in, and he was talking about releasing that song, The Bull. And he was like, I can't,

because stations that are against Bull competitors won't play the song. And I'm like, you've got to be. kidding me. People need to take a chill pill. Yeah. Just let art be art. Yeah.

Devin and Little Rock. Go ahead. So our song by Taylor Swift, she says when we're on the phone and you talk real slow because it's late and your mama don't know, he needs to talk low, not slow. It doesn't matter how to you go. True. Because you could be talking like,

yes, that's a good point. Our song is slams we know. Okay, yeah. Look at that. Hey, it's a good call. Appreciate you. So, the original one was this Luke Combs song where it's He won tickets for him and two of his buddies. You would never give away a threesome in golf. You would give away a four-sum.

So he should have said me in three of my buddies? I have one. Go ahead. Okay, you know, Carly Jepson, call me maybe, you know? She goes, in the song she goes, Before you came into my life, I missed you so bad. Well, no. you can't miss somebody before they were in your life.

Maybe she just missed somebody in her life. Fair point. But, okay, here's one. And 99 problems, this one's held me forever. Okay, what is it? It's Jay-Z going, he got pulled over going 55 and a 54. Well, you was doing 55 in a 54. There's no such thing as a 54 mile by our zone.

Never. Yeah. That is a really good point. So he should have said 56 and a 55. Well, no, it rhymed with four. but I mean there's nothing thing that's 54 mile an hour's own Yeah

Well you was doing 55 in the 54 I know a lot of you are So he's trying to rhyme with core I don't know what he was trying to rhyme with Wow That's a good one I'm gonna grab a couple more of these calls Where people hear a song

And they're like wait those lyrics Don't make sense Because a couple of the ones that I brought up The Luke Combs song When It Rains It Pores He won golf for him and two buddies But you had never won a three you'd win a four or something.

So that didn't make sense. In the Jay-Z line, I was doing 55 and a 54. Well, you was doing 55 into 54. There's no such thing as 54. Again, they're just singing along making rhymes up. Hey, Caleb and Louisiana, go ahead. Hey, and the Luke Bryan song played again. Whenever in the last verse, he breaks out his guitar,

and he starts playing her song, and she grabs his hand and starts dancing, which would effectively take out the music, so there's nothing for them to dance to. so he can't keep playing his guitar. Man, people are so smart. How do you guys pick up on this? Caleb, we call.

Kevin and Boston. Hey, yeah, I got one. Johnny Cash, Folsom County Blues. He shot a man in Reno just to watch a man die, but then he ends up in prison in California. So how does that happen? I don't know. Maybe extradition.

They couldn't. They couldn't bust him on the Reno shooting, but they got him for something else. Yeah, something else in the Cali. Fosome prison, yeah. Yeah, again. Just questions we all wonder about songs. You can put them on Facebook.

We'll wrap the topic up here on the air, but I always found that kind of interesting. Amy, tell you about the checks you got for $30,000? What? $30,000. It was sent to her husband, but what's his and yours? Yeah, I know. And it was in one of those checks.

Do you know, like when you get your check and you have to fold it on the dotted lines and then rip it apart and open up, just like a legit check that you would get? So I ripped off one side and then I was like, oh, this is for my husband. So then I was able to just like, you know, press it together where I could peek in and see what it was. And all I saw was 3-0 comma 0-0. Dang.

Right and that's up. I was like, we're about to get cake. Come to mommy. Yeah, I don't know what this is for. So I'm like, I don't know. Refunds. Something we sold. I don't know.

What is this? So I'm like, text my husband. I'm like, left to your little treat for when you get home, you know? Don't do that to your husband because he doesn't think it's something else. because he did. Like naked stuff? Yeah. Oh.

Yeah. Well, yeah. I mean, what are you thinking? I don't know. I think he thought like I was going to be on the counter when he got home. Yeah. I mean, I was still with a $30,000. I mean, to be honest, though.

Yeah, that's my point. But I was like, but even better, I left him a $30,000 check. So then he gets home and he opens up and he's like, what did you leave on the counter? I don't get it. I'm like, the check. You didn't see the check? He's like, yeah, I saw the check. He's like, that's one of those VA loans where they.

They try to send it out. And it says like in really tiny print, but I hadn't opened it up all the way. It's like, this is not a check. But they try to tell you how much money they could give you in a veteran loan. I hate those. Yes. And my husband being a vet, like he gets that stuff all the time and you can cash in on these VA loans. Anyway, we didn't really get $30,000.

But I thought for, I don't know, a good two hours until he ruined my day. Did you at least get naked on the counter? Yeah. I mean, after that disappointment, come on. I know, right. That's funny. Amy thought somehow they sold something that $30,000 appears. He sometimes doesn't clue me in on all his financial decisions to wear it because he knows.

He's got more of the business side of it. And I just roll with it because, I mean, I'm like, I trust him. Plus he handles all the bills. Like, if I lived on my own, y'all, I don't think I would, like, I'd be delinquent. They'd be like, this bill is due. I'd be like, okay, I'll get to it tomorrow. Not because I don't want to pay and make it. right with everybody. I just...

Because your heart's good. It's just, that's not my place. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think it's time for a little mystery game. You have to play a mystery game? Yeah. I love the mystery game. It's always a mystery with the prizes are going to be.

And so right now the phones are just screaming. Oh, I see Kenneth is being groomed. Hi, Kenneth. Good morning. How are you, buddy? Good. How are you doing? I'm good. We're going to play a game. It's the mystery game.

Now, you've already won the game. How exciting is that? That is excellent Now you get three choices of your prize That's why it's the mystery game You get prize number one $20 in cash Oh

Prize number two 20 seconds to talk on the air About whatever you want Profanity not included Oh Or you get the Mystery Prize Oh Kenneth

Will it be the cash The time Or the Mystery Prize Kenneth Yes sir Which one would you like? The mystery prize.

He wants a mystery prize. I love the mystery prize. Now, this can be anything. The prize, it could be crazy. Ray, what's the mystery prize today that Kenneth has chosen to win? You have just won an old shoe string from a pair of original 2003 Nike's that Bobby was about to donate. This was war during many runs in CrossFit sessions from Bobby's shoes in his early 20s. Congratulations and thanks for listening.

Back to you, Bobby. Thank you very much. They're a mystery. Dang. Kenneth, how do you feel? I feel excellent. Yes, sir. Yes, sir!

Yeah, I appreciate you, kid! That's awesome! I'm talking about right there. Hold on, I get you that shoe string. Now, are we shipping it to them for free? We didn't say that, though. Yeah, we didn't specify. So I guess we got to bail it for it.

Got to include that. You have to pay for shipping. Morgan's going to kill me. We lost on that one. Because I ended up having to ship stuff. We didn't pay all the car. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Have you watched my back on that shipping stuff?

Like, you just add that line. You must pay for your own shipping and handling. But we will ship them a shoe string. Hey, Kenneth, what are you doing today? Working. All right. What kind of job you got? I'm a sales manager with superior uniforms.

Well, I'm going to send you a little something, a little treat, a little momentum. And thank you for listening to the show. Don't hang up, right, buddy? Yes, sir. All right, that mystery prize gets you every time. Sometimes it's good, though. Sometimes it's real good. I mean, that was good.

The cash, though. Yeah. $20 in cash? I don't get in. I think people are more intrigued by the mystery prize than One day the mystery prize is going to be huge Bobby phones The Bobby Bones show

I was thinking trying to guess people's middle names is a thing And you know the Thomas Rett song Where it's like Hey and I try to guess your middle name So it's this right here I was thinking about that I don't know everybody's middle name in this room

So Amy You know mine Elizabeth Yeah Yeah see I knew you knew it Yeah Mine's a William.

Yep. Bobby William. Did you guys know that? No. You guys know something? Bobby William? No. Bobby William, what up?

Okay, so lunchbox, it's got to be something like, so generic. Like Bill? Yeah. Yeah. I think it would be, what is your, um, Patrick. Yeah, okay, something like that, yeah, yeah. What is it? Whoa, you guys think that's my middle name?

What's your middle name? Donald. It really is. My grandpa. No. Your middle name's Donald? That goes with your real first name, Donald. So you have your real first name.

No way. What you can find online. No way. I don't even care to say. It's Dan Donald. Your name's Dan Donald. No, it's not. Wait a minute.

It's like Jason Givis. That's my grandpa's name. His fake name is Jason Gibble, the lunchbox cheese. All the time. If you ever get to call me, Jason Gible. My dad's dad is Donald. And that's what my middle name is after. You're telling me your name is Dan Donald.

Is that? Is that bad? No, no, no. I'll just ask it. It's awesome. NLR is that the truth. Your name is Bobby William. I know, but NLR is that the truth.

Dan Donald. No. Why would you lie? D-D. D-D-Vox? Yeah, D-D. Any one is yours. Luis?

So it's Eduardo Luis. That's what's up. Yeah. Do you want to tell us your mental name? Do I want to tell you so everybody can have my social security number? Oh, my gosh. That's not how it works. Oh, that's not how it works.

I mean, I just said mine, you said yours, but yet he thinks people are going to get his social. And of all of ours to go after, they're not going to go after Bobby William, dude. They're going to go after Bobby William, dude. I've said it's been to him before a million times. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Bobby William has a lot of luck to love.

Consequently, we have been all gone after because of Bobby William, but go ahead. Oh, yeah, remember. Oh, yeah. Someone that worked for the IRS and. Someone that worked for the IRS has. into the files, into the IRS to try to find my information. And then not only they found it, but it's someone who worked for the IRS. Yes, but she didn't have clearance for what she was doing.

And that's why it took up. And then they went after Amy and they went after my girlfriend at the time. And then the law showed up to my house with dropped their badges. And I was like, I'm going to jail. I don't even know what I did, but I'm going to jail. And they were like, here is this person. And I recognized her from coming to tons of station events. Yep.

I haven't seen her. Anybody seen her since? No. No. I knew exactly. She was. In the big house, do you really think so? For sure, you can't do that stuff?

She's like hacked into the IRS file. Can't do that, man. Do you want to tell us your middle name? Do you really want me to? Yeah. Oh my gosh. He's coming up with another name right now. With that Thomas Wreck clip, it's a whole thing.

I don't get. I'm done. The Bobby Bones show. I can wrap it up for today. Thank you so much for listening. On Instagram, I'm Mr. Bobby Bones. You can click and follow. I'll say appreciate you guys being here.

Lots of. lots options for you. So the fact that you listen to us, we really appreciate that. And if you spend 10 minutes or five hours, we appreciate that. Listen to the show back on Iheart radio or iTunes. Just search Bobby Bone Show. Thank you very much. Bobby Bones. The Bobby Bones show. Air Tasker helps you get your weekends back.

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And finally, animal experts have confirmed that goats have regional accents. I'm getting a hint of Irish there. It feels good to get good news. It feels good to Geico.