The Bobby Bones Show - Bobby's Birthday & Producer Eddie Made His Son Sign A Contract

Episode Date: April 2, 2018

Bobby turns 38 today and Eddie made his son sign an actual contract to play baseball Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Get your Skypop protein soda now at Target or Ralph's. Bobby Bones. The Bobby Bones show. We're about to get to today's show. So it's the post show pre-show. I guess this is what we call this now, huh? Yeah. So today it was my birthday, and the show started off a little awkward, because when I got here this morning, I saw people dressed in red hoodies, and they had black glasses,

and I thought, this is just going to be distracting for me to do a show when everyone's dressed like me. And I said to Amy, is this a thing? And she was like, shh, let it be a thing. And I was like, it's just going to distract me the whole show and have a show to do. And it's like, let it be a thing. and so then I said I just can't and I know

it took about one minute for it not to be a thing I said I just don't want it to be a thing I don't want to walk in everybody looks like me because I got to focus and so Amy went what was the conversation you had around the room oh I just walked in and I was like okay everybody he's not this is not putting him in a good move

we need to take it off just everybody put on your own clothes but who would have thought that was like really lunchbox when they came to you and said hey let's all dress like Bobby for all show what would you think I said you know he's gonna hate it Right. Why would we do it? And they're like, it's so funny.

And I'm like, okay. I'm just more of a do-what-it-what-I'm told kind of a place right now. Me too. Not me. Not me. You did it, though. Right, because I'm not going to be the only one not doing it. I said it's a bad idea from the beginning. I mean, I didn't hate it. It's not horrible.

I didn't really know the end goal of it. What was the end goal? Bobby, I don't know. A music video? Oh, that would be cool. Maybe to make you just feel a little special. Celebrate you. But you guys know I don't like to be celebrating.

I agree. I agree. I know that. I like accomplishments, not accolades. Every 365 days. We're reminded. We're reminded. Yeah. Like, I just, I've never been a birthday guy. I know. I don't even mind getting older. So when did you write the zero down on your startboard? Oh, right away. So that was the first thing you did when you went? Before I knew. Before you even knew. I mean, he went negative. Yikes. Because I was just like, I don't want. I was negative. I'm not into this. What did you think of the decorations in the hallway? Didn't care. Good. Good for it. I didn't pull the balloons down. I had. I didn't pull the balloons down. I. I didn't. I don't. I. I didn't pull the balloons down. I. I. I. I was. I. I Fine. Wow. You've done that before, though. Like in Austin one time, the studio was totally decorated. My smaller studio. Oh, my goodness. He's hanging off everywhere.

I was like, you guys are kidding me. I'm trying to do a show here. He said everything out. I know to you guys is a big funny game. This is my mortgage payment. He said, take it all down. The work? No, this isn't funny games for us.

I know it's all funny games. Come in, dress like your buddy, Bobby, and we're all goof around. Oh, you mean you pay bills from this job? Yeah. I don't. Yeah. Bobby, us too. Sorry that sometimes we try to think of you.

No, it's... No, don't do that either. Sorry we try to think of you. Sorry, we put you first, Bobby. No, that's not what we're doing here. And I know I can sound a bit crotchety, but I never have, like, birthdays ever. I know. You got to unpack.

You got to go to that camp. What's that camp? San Juanama. No. We hold you in our heart. And when we think about you, it makes you want... What is it? Onawana.

Oh, whatever. Camp, onemana. We hold you in our hearts. Okay, yeah. What's the deal today? What'd you learn? On site. Anything good?

I'm going to go to on site. Yeah. I'm telling you, I don't know what I'm going to do here. I'll go with you. Like I might, to keep doing the show, I might not. I've said this before. Roll your eyes if you want. I'm like rolling my eyes and taking deep breaths because it's like.

This is the truth. The reason I haven't got that tattoo on my arm, because I said if I got put into the Radio Hall of Fame, which I even admit to this day, is still ridiculous. But it's fact. It is fact. I'm in it. I said, if I got it, I was going to put an old school microphone. I'm armed.

But I haven't decided to stay in radio or I don't know what I'm going to do. If I come in with a tattoo, you know I'm staying. Whoa, come on. Now we have to look at your arm every day. Yeah, I know. That's like you have zero concern for our mortgage payments, you know. No, we're just doing this for fun, Amy. Yeah.

I know that's the only one doing this for a mortgage. You guys can keep doing radio all you want. With you. Yeah, now that'd be pretty bad. Like who? Who would hire us? Like, I can't. My point is you can't hold me to a standard for you.

I can't just work to take care of you guys my whole life. Right. I'm not worried about, if you want to leave, go ahead and leave, and I will find. Someone else will hire us. You really set this up wrong, Bobby, because I've been planning on riding these coattails. I tell you what, wherever I go. What do you do for living?

Why do you think we wore red hoodies today, dude? Well, listen. We know where our bread is buttered. Okay, and that's not it. You guys, Amy, you're painting me in a terrible corner today all the way around. Yeah. She's like throwing jabs during the show by ex-girlfriend. Oh, are you telling you, are you showing your period?

I'm on like day two, three. Oh, okay. That's why. You said that last week. No, I started, no, that's not day 11. Y'all, do you all understand anything about the body? No. PMS is pre-menstrual. So pre.

So your girls are crazy before it starts. So I was pre, and then I started. And now I'll know. I'm a little bit fine. But I didn't do the girlfriend thing. No, I was trying to be. vague because I mean now she's probably listening to this

but there's some that listen and I don't want to be like yeah you could have her back all I said was later on the show you'll hear it the segment about biggest regrets in life and I was like I have four girlfriends that I would have worked with and I've been the common denominator of the screw up I've said that before and Amy's like yeah but there's one

you can't one you can and I'm like wait what because I think that there's one that's totally moved on and in a healthy way and then there's one that maybe if y'all could work it out. Maybe y'all could work it out. All out here is challenge. Because I know how much she cares.

Oh my gosh. I didn't mean to pay you in a bad light. I don't know what you're talking about. Now you're making me feel bad. Amy made me feel guilty a minute ago because people cared. She goes, oh, you're sorry, we cared. I heard that. That's it. Lunchbox, anything from today? Man, I just learned that Amy isn't good at selling panties. That's true, too. You'll hear that.

That's true. No, no, I wasn't even given the opportunity. You need to sell panties. Hey, can come in. Like. That's our boss. If, if. Here.

Hey, send Rod in here. If I had a chance to sell the panties. Yeah, that's what we were just never given the chance. Nobody even considered me. And you just want to be considered. We can address that. Hey. You just want to be considered.

Come in. Hop on this mic for a second. You know? This is Rod, our boss. Oh, this is good question. You get old. Amy got upset on the show today. I didn't know.

Because Morgan number two was offered an endorsement for bra and panties. Ooh, I just heard that. Yes. And Amy wasn't. So she's like, how come I'm too old. I don't have do braw panties? Thoughts? You're asking me if she's too old?

Well, no, she's not too old for it. I was little interested in the fact that she thought she should have been asked before somebody else was asked. I wasn't sure where that was going. Biaz-ish? I mean, at least by Amy's standards a little bit, Beyonce-ish. Yeah. How do you like that light painted in? I didn't think so at all.

I'm just saying I do normally get an email about it at least. That's what I'm saying. What he's saying is not even about the panties. It's about to be in diva. That's what he's going at. I don't think that that's diva at all. Bobby has said it. Not at all?

I think you've earned the right to be a little divie if you asked me. I'm with you. You should be asked first. Oh, if lunchbox's with you, get away. Abort mission. What do you mean? I'm on her side and on. Bobby.

You never want lunchbox on your side, Amy. Yeah. Well, you kind of, look, you never are that person, but you were on that line this morning. You were a little bit going down that road. Okay. I mean, never mind. I don't know. No, she doesn't want the brawn panties.

That one came from the boss. Yeah, so. Oh, but can we give props to Lunchbox, by the way, in his read? That's the best read you've ever done. Hey, when we talk about brown panties, I'm good. He's like, let me do it. And then he nails it. And we're like, well, that was it funny?

Like, where was the funny? He's never read that goodness of life. Let me do a comedy bit. Greetings all, bra and panties here at 2499. Well, see, the problem was, it said panty. It was singular, so it really threw me up. I was looking for panties so I could make it go longer, but it's a panty. He just nailed it, dude.

You can't help it. You're good now. I can't, yeah. All right, well, that's it. I'm a professional. Here comes the show. And Amy feel all right? No, now she feels bad.

See, you attacked Bobby and you were okay with it. You get attacked and it's like, oh. No, because the point of it is is that if you're used to getting emails, I don't know. My point is, I see the emails. I see them come through and there's an opportunity. So instantly I'm thinking, it's because I'm third. 37 and she's 24. So they didn't even consider me.

Like I didn't even get an email. I didn't even get a, hey, you interested in this? That was more so my point. But now it's that I'm a diva. I never said that. I'm with you. And Bobby, you're with me too. I'm with you.

Bobby's not having my back right now for some reason. See, Amy, I got your back. Amy should be number one on the total pole. Can we just address that Bobby turns 30? today and I just said Bobby didn't have my back and I know he should and he's like because you didn't have mine. That's right.

I'm 11. Yeah. Okay, here we go. We're going to start the show. All right. Thank you. Can we sing happy birthday real quick for you? Yeah.

Why not? Thanks. Folks, it's your buddy and mine. Mr. Bobby bones. Let's America. This is the Bobby Ball. Yeah, good morning. Welcome to Monday show.

More studio. Morning. Yeah, let's go there. Monica in Kansas. Hey, Monica. Hi, Bobby. What's happening? Oh, my gosh.

I am just so excited to talk to you. I am a teacher and I'm on spring break this week. I still set my alarm early to get up and listen to you guys. I listen to this right here. Man, I would tell you, if I wasn't doing this show, I wouldn't be listening to this show. I'll be honest. This morning stuff is for the birds. No, I love you guys.

I have just made such an influence, had such an influence in my life. And I tell my students Amy's morning corny. and, I mean, I've just been listening for years, so. Well, thank you very much. Listen, I commend anyone that can wake up in the morning and enjoy it. Would you consider yourself a morning person, Monica? I think that you guys help me to be a morning person, for sure. Amy, are you a morning person?

Not really. But I'm also not a night owl. I'm just a middle ground. Yeah, you're a middle grounder. Yeah. Lunch boys? Oh, I don't think so. I don't think so.

So, I mean, I can wake up and be in a good mood, but I'd rather sleep, sleep, sleep until noon, then get up and be just Mr. Awesome. But you are, though, Mr. Awesome. That's what's confusing. I know, so that's why it's weird. Like, I'm pretty much an all-day dude. So both of you are all-day dudes, huh?

Eddie? Until I get my cup of coffee, I'm in a pretty crummy mood. Man, I just am not a morning person at all. No part of me is a morning person. But you definitely are a night out. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I mean, two days on vacation,

and my schedule is completely flipped, and it takes me a month to get back. Yeah, here we are. We're a morning show full of people that aren't morning people. What time do you go to bed on vacation? I don't, 3 a.m. Normally when I wake up. And it takes two days for me to flip the script, man.

Just whoop. Oh, here we go. Yeah, that Bobbycast, I did with Morgan number two, I said, you know, the first hour and a half, I fake it. I was like, woo, here I am. But inside I'm like, oh, here I am. I hate you. Well, Monica, thank you for calling. In all honesty here, you know, yeah.

that's us being honest, and we're glad you listen to. I'm just so glad, and thank you so much for everything that you guys do. You've really made an impact in so many people's lives and in mine. So I just, I appreciate you. Oh, well, thank you very much. Very kind of you, and I appreciate you. Bobby Booms. Recognizing people doing cool things.

It's ICU. No, this is cool. Jekyll Jackson of Chicago is on a mission to help the homeless 10 years old, has already given out over 6,000 blessing bags to those in need. Blessing bags are filled with basic items that the homeless can use to improve their lives. His website is up. It's a social entrepreneurship program starting when he's 8 years old. And again, over 6,000 blessing bags.

Isn't that crazy? That is really awesome. Yeah, so, Jekil Jackson, I see you. The Bobby Bone Show. Big Three Stories. It's producer Raymond that out of control Chinese space station smashed Earth at 17,000. thousand miles per hour off the coast of Tahiti, a majority of the space station burnt up upon reentry to Earth.

In airline news, a Delta flight landed safely at JFK Airport. After a bird strike during takeoff shutting down an engine, luckily no injuries, everybody was okay. And finally, in sports and basketball, Notre Dame won the Women's National Championship last night. The men's national championship between Villanova and Michigan is tonight. Our audio producer Raymond, he sits in the glass room, so there's a wall between us. But he's always editing clips.

What time do you get in the morning, Raymond? I actually get in here about 1 a.m. And so he takes the Uber to work sometimes. He lives downtown, and he'll just hit his phone app and the Uber picks him up. And so guess what the Uber app had in this car. Any guesses? The Uber app had in his car. The guy, the Uber driver, yeah.

Oh, it had to be like some alcohol? Alcohol, is that true? No, no, no. What do you have? A gun. Whoa. Yeah, and he actually brandished it. He took it right out and showed it to me.

We're talking one o'clock in the morning and said, yeah, I carry it every time I'm driving just so I'm safe. And I feel like I'm one of the safer Uber drivers out there, but I just wanted to show it to you. Out of nowhere, showed me his gun. Yeah, he wants to let you know, don't try any funny business because it's one o'clock in the morning, and I don't trust this cat, because I've had a driver tell me he has one under his seat. He hadn't showed it to me, but said, yeah, I have a little gun right under there. That's where I store it. Yeah, he said he had a carry permit.

and just pulled it right out of a stop plate, showed it to me. What's this showing a gun? I have no idea. If you have to call attention, you can say it, if it comes up in conversation. And I understand it's the middle of the night. But I'm going to give the analogy of a good golfer, right? A good golfer never says they're a good golfer. If someone who plays golf like, hey, you play it?

Yeah, you know, a little bit. You're good? Yeah, I'm okay. If somebody ever goes, yeah, I'm a great golfer, they're full of crap. If someone's showing you the gun, they don't know what they're doing with the gun. They're not a response. A responsible gun owner. Oh, they're just bragging.

As someone who has guns, I don't put my guns online. I don't say much about him. That guy, that's nuts. They would show his gun. And the light turned green, so he just set it in his lap for a couple lights. And then the next one, he put it away. He holstered it. He's just firing in the sky.

Why is this? That's scary, man. Are you still Uber driving, by the way? I am here and there. It's a great way to make money. I'm not saying that it isn't lucrative anymore. It's awesome. But whenever I have the time, trust me, that's all I think about.

That's all you think about? Oh, yeah. When I get out of work, I'm like, wonder if there's people who need an Uber right now. I should head downtown. Well, there he is. Our producer Raymond and his Uber Guns story. Time now for your positivity with Tell Me Something Good. Hey, me.

This is pretty awesome. A high school senior girl, she was accepted into West Point, the Naval Academy, and the Air Force Academy. All three branches of the military. their schools. Like that's just so rare. To get into any of them, like Air Force Academy, I think it's like 14%. And your husband was there. My husband did go there. And it wasn't easy. I mean, you have to get letter.

First of all, you have to have all this stuff. We get letters from senators and congresspeople or whatever. And she has chosen West Point. Her name is Bliss Hutchings. Yeah. All three, huh? You got in all three. Dang. Lunchbox. What's up, babe? Oh, dear.

There's three cops driving around New York and they see a group of kids having a snowball fight and they notice they're using those little rubber gloves you use to clean dishes and socks on their hand. They're like, you can't have a good snowball fight in those. They stop by the store, buy them all brand new good gloves and say, this is how you have a snowball fight. Yeah, that's pretty cool. That is pretty cool.

How about this one? Sheriff's deputies in North Carolina attended a parent student dance at a local elementary school to fill up her parents who couldn't be there. A lot of the parents couldn't get off work. And so you have a bunch of kids who can't go to the parent student dance because their parents aren't there. So some of the sheriff's deputies said, hey, we'll go. Wow. And we'll go with kids. Love it.

Yeah, that was pretty elementary school, too. You know, if you're a fourth grader, you want to be able to go with your other fourth grade friends. Exactly. Yeah, so shout out to those North Carolina deputies there. And that's tell me something good. Bobby bones. Got a few people on the show, eight or nine or so, all together. Who would you say on the show, Am, is the biggest music nerd, music snob on the show?

You? Okay. Who would you say no is the least best? music? Me or Lunchbox? Lunchbox. Lunchbox. Would we all agree

Lunchbox knows the least about music? Yes. Come on. Now, all of the side of lunchbox comes in the room just talking about how he's a big Simon

and Garfunkel fan. Oh dear. Yeah. Dude, they're so good. Yep. He says he listens to their music all the time. Yeah, live from

what is it called? Central Park. So what's your favorite Simon and Garfunkel song? I got to play it and then I can sing you the words. No, I thought you were a big fan. No, I am.

I listen to, when I play the CD, they don't say, hey, this is song, whatever. It just plays a song. I'm like, oh, that's a good one. And tell them to sing one. Do you like Paul Simon? I don't know which ones. I don't even know what they look like.

I have no idea who they are. I just know that their music is the jam. I got their album live from New York, and it's good. One of their most famous songs. Go ahead. Keep going. No, no, not. Keep going.

Hold on. This is the most famous part of the song, too. Yeah, well, there's the title. Okay, next one. The sound of silence. Yeah, yeah, keep going. Next one. What?

Give me the next one. Maybe I wouldn't, maybe that's not my favorite. They didn't play that one in live in New York? I'm not a poser fan. I like the, I like the album cuts. Oh, okay. This has to be the biggest song. Of these two, yeah.

Yeah, go ahead. Hold on. Oh, yeah. Here comes. What is the name? You're such a die-hard. Stop. Stop.

I know this Come on, feel it I'm feeling it By the way, right now you're hearing Lunchbox as a big fan of an artist Yeah, keep going I know this one

Let's sing Mrs. Robinson This is Yeah You knew two words Oh whoa Thanks to you Mrs. Robinson

Yeah Let me see this one See I knew that one I am just a poor boy sitting on the ledge No, you're making self up now You're making himself up I'm just a poor boy sitting on the ledge

Alright next one next one No, no there's no Those are three biggest Simon and Garfin No, I nailed it No You gotta give me album cuts man Like I'm not a poser Album cuts

Yeah When they do live in New York That's not really a whole lot of album cuts Man I'll tell you what that live in New York though, it's a good one Live from Central Park I think it's what it's called

If you want to be exact Yeah Is that right? How many times do you listen to it. Oh, probably 100. And you don't know I'm done. What? He's done. You believe that he's a big fan? No. Why do you not think I'm a big fan? Because you couldn't name the four

biggest songs that they have. I don't know the names of a song. You could even sing them except for the word. Mrs. Robinson. Okay. It's like you're a big Eminem fan, right? Yeah. Yeah. Ah. Ah. Yeah. On's heavy. If you had. One chance. One opportunity. Would you capture it? What opportunity. Sevent everything you ever wanted. Would you capture it?

One moment. Would you capture it? Okay. Yeah. Woo. Yo. He's a sweaty. And he's a week already.

Bombing on the sweater already. Okay. I'm done. I'm out. The latest from Nashville in Hollywood. Amy's 32nd skinny. Taylor Swift made a surprise appearance at Nashville's Bluebird Cafe on Saturday night. She told stories, performed songs.

even drank a little fireball whiskey. It's all going to be part of a documentary that they're doing in honor of the club's 35th anniversary. Sugar Land finally revealed the release date of their first new album in seven years. It's going to be called Bigger, and it's coming out June 8th. I'm Amy. That's your 32nd Skinny. Lobby Bone Show.

Boney Up the Day. This story comes to us from California. A man ordered a $461,000. Ferrari. He was going to be out of town when it was delivered, so he said, brother-in-law, I need you to sign for it, accept it. So he does take some pictures. He's like, man, if I take it for a spin, no big deal, right?

No big deal, it's your brother-in-law. Yeah. No big deal. Calls his buddy over, they go for a spin and they wreck into a tree. Oh, wow. That's totaled. That's not rare. Oh, yeah. Oh, I wonder if that insurance premium covers dumb brother-in-law. Get that dumb brother-in-law coverage. Oh, man. I'm lunchbox. That's your bonehead story

of the day. You know he hated that call. have to call and go. Hey, how's your day going? Yeah, cool, cool. Yeah, yeah, just hanging out. Hey, by the way, you know that, Ferrari? You know that Ferrari?

You just bought it? About that. There's a little dent. I mean, I total it. Folks, it's your buddy and mine. Mr. Bobby Bong. So we do a segment with our 24-year-old head of digital. Morgan number two.

What your 24-year-olds care about? Morgan number two, what's happening over there? So people are split on how they feel about a slice of ketchup. What do you mean a slice of ketchup? I haven't seen this. It's called slice of sauce and people are essentially making ketchup in slices so you don't have to squirt it and be in

liquid form so it doesn't get all over your food. So it tastes like ketchup but it's like an American cheese slice? Really? Yes, exactly. Wait, okay, now everyone reacted differently about this. To me, I'm not pro or con because I'm curious, but lunchbox went. Yeah, how do you

freeze it into that form? Freeze it? No, no, no, you mold it into it's like a, you could probably like a gelatin. How do you make it dry? That's disgusting. It's not dry. You're not into it. No. Eddie? Oh, I think it's genius. Yes. The easier way you can make a sandwich for the kids, boom, love it. And if you like that ketchup flavor, who cares if it's in a square or powder form or liquid or...

Powder, you say. I don't know. You're looking for the flavor, right? So wait, how do you get this? It's on a Kickstarter right now, so it hasn't officially released yet, but there's like $28,000 already in it. People are really interested in this idea. Bones, think about it. $28,000 already. I'm seeing slices of ketchup right now.

Yeah, I'd be interested to try. You know, ketchup is so sugar-filled. Yes. You could be on a great diet and you put ketchup. Like, in just a tablespoon, it's four grams of sugar. Just a tablespoon. So if you go... It's that fructose.

It's all the sugar. Smoothies have about 30 grams of sugar. I was driving by a smoothie king of the day, and everybody's just in a war. And you just think to yourself, healthy. It's just so much, so much sugar. Yeah, you don't know, you don't know. I used to always get the angel hair smoothie from there.

Me too. It was on the light. In college, I was obsessed with it. No wonder I was a little bit puffier. There you go. Thank you, Morgan number two. Yep. I was thinking about your lunchbox this weekend.

I went to a record store, like an old school record store in Fresno. And I bought like a 1978 suitcase record player with speakers. And I bought some old. And I was like, man. lunch markets would hate this place. That's all I was thinking is. I was wondering where you were going with that. He would hate it.

Because you were so cool at an old record store. Like, look at me. Oh, yeah. I got a vintage album. You didn't say look at him. No, no, not at all. But that's what it screams. No, no, actually, I rarely talk about records at all.

But it wasn't new records. They had no new records. That's awesome. It was all, and it was some really random stuff that you didn't want. But I did. They had one old record player. And I found it. It's a suitcase record player.

And it's ugly. but it's really old school. So do you take it everywhere you went? Like it was your third suitcase? No, I didn't. It's so heavy, though. They didn't play in the 70s. They just made it feel like it's full of bricks.

Yeah. So I did that. It was in Fresno, was in Vegas, did a couple of stand-up shows. They were good. My friends sent me this blanket. Have you heard about this heavy blanket? Oh, is it supposed to help you with anxiety?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, my best friend, one of my best friends from high school, she's a teacher and she keeps one in her room for students. So I get this box in the mail And the Amazon lady hands it to me Right? It's like heavy She's like lugging it in up to my front porch

Because I was outside She goes hey this is for you and she hands it to me And it feels like a box of bricks I'm like what is this? Another suitcase record player And so I open it up and it's a blanket And it's really heavy And so I take it out of the pouch

And I lay under it And it does It feels like a large man is laying on top of you I liked it you like that Okay Is it really Do you think that we should

I really like it I don't know the name of it It was sent to me yesterday afternoon And I don't know Amazon came on Sunday Much less Easter Sunday Oh yeah Easter that's that's interesting I wouldn't think they would

But hey never an opportunity to miss a dollar I guess so Amazon doesn't sleep It's a heavy heavy blanket It's probably 15 pounds Whoa And you lay under it And again it feels like

It's supposed to Offer you comfort. Well, at least my friend was telling me about it. Because I think she was trying to, you know, tell me I should order one one day when I was... Well, mine was forced upon me. Kind of crazy. I know. I wish she would have just gifted it to me.

But that's, I'm glad that you like it. Now that may make me order it. Yeah. Almost no anxiety. For special times. I call him Charlie. Oh, boy. You named it.

Why don't you name it? Well, Charlie could be, you know. Charlie sounds strong. Your girlfriend next thing you know. Our unisex name, yeah. Jen and Massachusetts. morning. Hi.

How are you? I'm good. I was talking about this blanket. It's a really heavy blanket. I'd never heard of it. I think it weighs 10 pounds, 15 pounds. And I slept under it last night. And apparently it's for people with anxiety.

Have you heard of this thing? I have heard of it. I've never used it, but I did just order three of them. Yeah. Because I got them for myself and my two daughters. And I did do a lot of research on them. So they are supposed to help with anxiety, but also for like wrestling sex syndrome and things like that.

Yeah, I enjoyed it last night. Like I said, it felt like. I didn't know a better analogy, but I felt like some human was laying on top of me. I didn't. Well, I didn't mind that. I'm going to be honest with you. I felt pretty good. And then you named it Charlie.

I didn't feel as lonely last night. Hello, you're on the air of Pittsburgh. Peyton. Hi. You have one of these? Yeah, it's called a gravity blanket. My friend actually has one, and she brings it everywhere with her. How does she carry it? It's heavy.

I don't know. She's just gotten used to it, I guess. She brings it everywhere. I mean, like, we'll go to the movie. She's like, oh, here's my gravity blanket. I'm like, what are you doing? Well, I don't know the exact name of mine, but I do like it. Hey, I'm going to be in Pittsburgh this weekend, Peyton.

Did you know that? I'm sorry? I'm going to be in Pittsburgh this weekend. I've never been to Pittsburgh before. Oh, really? Yeah, I'm going to be there Saturday night. My stand-up shows in town. So yeah, everybody in Pittsburgh.

Come on out, Bobby Bones Comedy.com. Thank you for calling. So there's that. It was sent to me as a birthday present. Let me address this. It is my birthday. Don't like birthdays. Not because I'm getting older, by the way.

I don't mind the age thing. It's don't like birthday. When I was a kid, I never got birthdays. Right, so you don't like being celebrated. It's awkward. I know you have a tone right now with me. I do because you walk in today. But you read the room.

The room is, I'm very uncomfortable with birthdays. I never have parties. I grew up very poor. So we never have birthday parties. And so I don't like them. It feels like a charity case to me. I was always a kid that had to have food given to them. So I'm like birthday parties.

And I come in and everybody's dressed like me. Do you think I want to sit in a room where it looks like me anyway? Probably not. Probably not. Probably awkward. And I say, Amy, can you take care of this? Because I don't want everybody to dress like me. I don't want this. And so Amy then scolds me.

She took care of it. Well, she scolds me for being irritated. I didn't know I could get in trouble for my feelings. On your birthday. Yes. And so. Well, let's first of all address the board. When you walk in this morning, we're going to talk about the number.

Okay, so every day we walk in and Bobby and I work together. So we have a board where you put, you know, where you are on a scale of one to 10. How you feel. How you feel. Like last week. on Friday I think Bobby was a seven. I was like, whoa, seven. That's amazing.

He's a seven. And I was like an eight. Today I'm feeling pretty good. Bobby walks in, he puts zero. And I'm like, stop being dramatic. That's the lowest you can go. Yes. And then I'm like, great.

So that means I'm in a room with a zero having to deal with a zero. And then I didn't really believe him when he put it up there because it was like, oh, yeah, okay. And then the more it went on, I was like, yeah, he's a zero. From the jump. I said it was a bad idea. Someone sent out the text saying, hey, we should all dress like Bobby. I was like, bad idea, guys.

Who thinks that's a good? You guys know me? Exactly. I said, I know Bobby. And when we had decorations in the studio, I said, first thing he's going to say is take him down. At least Flushbox knows me after all these years. Okay, whatever. We know you, but doesn't mean nobody's going to give.

There's some of us that don't want to give up on celebrating you. You get, hey. And I'm just preparing you for something later today. And if you get irritated by it. I don't mind things in private. Oh, dang, no, Amy's zero. In private, what do you mean in private? It's not going to be private, and there's going to be people there.

Celebrating you. At some point, you have to get over the fact that you didn't have parties when you were a kid. America, free country, I can do whatever I want. All I ask, I just get uncomfortable and I don't like it. And then would you like it if everybody was dressed like you when you came to work? Again. I think kind of funny, Amy. Yeah, that would be really funny.

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, we don't have a, I don't have a signature look. I don't either. You ever have run red hoodies and glasses. For my comedy tour. Go ahead. To be fair, LundFox is right.

We didn't really know how you would receive that. But if someone has an idea and it's thoughtful, like there's no reason why some of us shouldn't get behind it and try to just, nobody wants, we don't want to hurt anybody else's feelings, but you don't mind. No, I'm very TCB. Take care of business. Yeah. Let's get in.

I don't feel comfortable. Let's change it up. We got to get on the yard and do some work. Anyway, I appreciate the thought. Do you, you do? Read the room. Okay. I'm in the room today.

Okay, read it. And it's his birthday. You're supposed to do what he wants. Thank you. The room looks so cute, though. Not to be bah humbug. It's your day, man. That's what you want.

How many years we've been doing? How many years we've been together? A long time, trust me. I know. How many years? We've been together. I mean, us 12, you in Lunchbox? Yeah, and cancel that performer at eight.

Cancel that performer and a surprise. Candy Graham. I told Amy, I said, no surprises. Like during the show. Like, no surprise. I don't like surprises. Especially during work. But during private time, we're okay?

Yeah. Like last night, I had a friend bring me a nice pair of shoes. It was a nice moment. Appreciate it that. Cool. Bye-bye. Tomorrow, though. If it's random, I like it.

Okay. Yeah, birthday. Not so much. Okay, I'm done, though. Have birthday to me. Birthday's over. Happy birthday, man. That's it.

No more. All right. No more today. 27 today. Feeling good. Yeah. Zero. There's a story about Shaquille O'Neill blowing $70,000 at Walmart.

Oh, that's awesome. Wow. Oh, what was he? Like on Easter? No, no, for himself. That's awesome. When I read the headline, I'm like, oh, cool. He bought Easter stuff for kids in his neighborhood.

It's the biggest purchase in Walmart history, and it goes to Shaquille O'Neill. So it happened back in the day. There's a show called Real Sports on HBO, and Shaq talks about, he got moved to Phoenix in a trade and so he had to get all the stuff first place, you know, kitchen utensils and blenders. And he went in, he said before he knew it he had $70,000

in furniture, amenities, clothing. I have to respect Shaq for Walmart. That's awesome. Yeah. So he said they rejected his card. Well, yeah. Because it was a 70,000. Yeah, you got to break that up. No, you know. You just got to call ahead of time.

Check your limit. Yeah. So Shaq spent 70 grand at There was also another story about Leo DiCaprio, because he's, what is he, 42? 42. His girlfriend's 20. Yes. And we had the discussion on if that was cool or not.

Not like, is it cool, but is it okay? And my thought was, I don't think he's developed enough since you're in the Hollywood bubble. You only have to grow as much as you need to. And you're rich. He was a childish actor. So he's probably 20 in his mind. So he dates 20-year-olds. That's my reasoning that he's always dating these 20-year-olds.

I mean, what's your reason? Models, 20-year-old models. Okay. I think they're just really mature, and he likes attractive women. I'm not hating. Well, so his girlfriend now says she was not impressed by his movie The Revenant. Because what happened was when she starts dating him, they start searching everything she's ever written. And she posted a blog post back in the day.

She was like, I don't even like that movie. There's way before she dated them. Wow. Yeah. Her new, Camilla Morone. I mean, how old was she when she was watching it? Probably 13. Oh, man, haters.

It's like right when Twitter came out, she's like, hey. She puts us on MySpace when she was nine. She said, I'm a huge Leo and Tom Hardy fan. Oh, that's kind of weird. What is? And they're dating now. And she was like a hardcore fan when she was a kid. No, she wasn't a kid.

The Remnant came out like three years ago, guys. Okay, she was 17. Okay, she was 17. Okay, she could have graduated high school at 17. I did. Oh, my gosh. Yeah, I was 17 when she was 17. when I graduated high school.

It's because his birthday's in the summer. Oh, right, right. Wait, are you super smart? No. Genius. Let me talk to him. Are you super smart? Yes.

Why do you think I was ahead of my grade? Like, I should have been a year back, but no, 17. I graduated high school. Head on to college. Graduated college 21? You didn't graduate, though, until years later. No, he still hasn't. Oh, you still haven't graduated college.

That's me. This isn't about me. I'm just saying she could have been out of high school at 17. It was three years ago, the Revenant. It's not a big deal. What part of it to you was weird, that she was a fan? Yeah, a little bit. I mean, if you were Leo and you were reading that,

like, Bobby, if you were dating someone and then you found out, like, years before, they're like, I'm such a big fan of... Like they wrote a blog talking about how much of a fan. Yeah. I'd just be happy to have somebody. I'd be honest with you. At this point, Amy, don't you know, today I'm 38? I'm still single.

Never been married, no kids. I'm actually looking for blogs of people that used to be fans so I can hit him up. That's like saying Bobby couldn't date Halliburic, because he liked her movie back in the day. I mean, that's just not right. You grow to know someone and you like him. No, he could. The weird part would be for Hallie.

That's what I'm saying. Why is that weird? Then she couldn't date anybody because she's been in movies. If someone liked her movie, they're all off limits? I mean, Leo is pretty famous. Right. So you're saying it's hard for him not. Yeah, but I've never blogged about him or said I'm a super fan.

You're too old for him, though. Sorry. And not a supermodel. And I'll heart you are, though. There are times on this show because there are so many personalities here that jealousy does happen And it just happened off the air bit Because Morgan number two who's 24

She's the newest person to our show And I guess you have your first commercial Is that true? Yeah, for AdoreMe.com What's it called? Adore me.com Like a door, like I adore you. Yeah.

And what is it for? It's laundry, swimwear, and like just like, I don't know I don't know what you would call that kind of clothing, but it's basically lingerie and swimwear. You better sell this a little better. Yeah, yeah, yeah. More intimate type. Yeah, that's the word I was looking for, intimate. So, Amy, you're how old?

37. I just turned 37. And Morgan number two is 24. And so. I mean, normally, here's my thing. Here's my thing. I would say that a lot of times this, maybe I at least like know about a spot or I get an email, a commercial, a commercial, and endorsement like, hey, are you interested

do you want to pass? It's like a seniority thing, you know? They didn't even come to Amy for it. Yeah. And so other people, other girls in the show will do spots like if I've turned it down. Right. Right. Would you agree? Am I wrong on this? I don't know. But I never even heard of this. Like, so now I'm like, now I'm thinking that I wasn't even considered for the lingerie swimwear spot because I'm 30s.

Or am I getting too old? Or why, I mean, I didn't even get a, hey, your thoughts on this. Yeah. You want to be consulted at least, right? Even if they didn't want me, I just want to be considered. It's called ador me.com. Yeah, I like their website. Adormy.com.

Oh, man. Yeah. So Morgan number two, do you have your commercial that you would read normally? Yeah, I think Ray has it. Hey, get a tour. I want to hear what this is all about because I haven't heard this yet. Hey, bring in that Adorme spot from Morgan number two. I'll tell you what.

We'll go over to Amy and catch up. what's happening and we'll come back and I want to hear about this. Amy's a little hurt. I see this. It's okay, Amy. I mean, I know I'm not the youngest on the show anymore. But it's like, I can't do those spots or what? I mean, I got a husband.

Okay. I know, maybe you have a husband so it doesn't matter anymore. Oh, what you got? Yeah, what you got them? Who cares? Okay. Bobby Bonson. Here we go.

The latest from Nashville in Hollywood. Amy's 32nd. So shout out to Brett Eldridge. She just created a new foundation called the Brett Eldridge Family Foundation. But it's pretty amazing because it's going to help children battling cancer and will help raise money for research and to find a cure. So I love that. And then Gwen Stefani, she has launched her own cosmetic line or at least put it out there. We don't have an exact release date of when you can get her makeup, her nail polish, her hair color, and skin care products.

But it is going to be called paint. But you know the AI part of paint is the number eight Cute Paint I'm Amy, that's your 30 seconds skinny Cute cute Okay over to Morgan number two By the way this is not paid

I just am interested in hearing about this This is our very first ever commercial This is a lingerie commercial that they didn't even approach Amy about They went right to our 24 year old Yeah of course So and it's called what? It's called the Dormey.com First of all as a professional broadcaster like I am

When you do a commercial you really have to make sure they know what the product is I don't know what you're saying. Okay. So maybe just... Oh, here we go. Here's the pro. Go ahead. Go ahead, Amy.

Go ahead, bro. Maybe just make sure they know that you're saying, Ador. Yeah. Instead of Adormy. Okay. Ador. Yeah, like...

Go ahead. A door. How long is your commercial over there? It's 15 seconds. Okay. And here we go. Here's Morgan number two. Go ahead.

And action. It's the Adormee. It's the Adormee. Affordable, high quality lingerie, bra and pantiesets and swimwear. Wait, that have you? Wow. You say that one?

Wow. Wow. Wow. Risque. You say antpanias. Well, that's the thing. I always like to wear panties, but I know it's not universally accepted sometimes. They want you to say brawl and panties.

That's why Amby's not doing it. Ammy's like braziers and undergarments from the 1800s. Come on, guys. Be matured. No, I think. Go ahead. Go ahead. Sorry.

Do you want me to start over? Yeah. Everybody be quiet about it. Go ahead. Okay. It's the Adormee. Spring Sale, affordable high-quality lingerie, bra and panty sets

in swimwear designed by women for women and delivered right to your door. Set started just 2495 at adormy.com slash bones. I think it's pretty good. Can I try to read it? No. Okay, let her read it.

There's lunchbox doing the laundry. Go ahead. It's the adormy.com spring sale. Affordable, high-quality lingerie, bra and panty sets and swimwear designed by women for women, delivered right to your door. Set start at 2495 at adormey.com slash bones.

Adormey.com slash bones. But you read it right on. Yeah, that wasn't as creepy as I thought. Yeah, we thought you were going to do like panties. I was trying to sound mature because if I said panties. Affordable, high quality lingerie, bra, and panty sets. See, that's what we were expecting. There we go.

Okay. Here, Kenny Chip. Oh, well, congrats, Morgan. Hey, don't be a hater. I'm not. I'm jealous. Hey, get her a bra and panty set so our day ago a little bit. Folks, it's your buddy and mine.

Mr. Bobby Bones. Let's go. Transmitting across America. This is the Bobby Bones show. That's right. I have a story in a second about Eddie, our producer, and he made his kids sign a contract. How old are your kids? I have a 10-year-old and a 4-year-old.

Stand-by for that. Over to Amy first. Let's do the morning corny. The morning corny. Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? No. What? Oh, man.

No. It's fine. He woke up. Oh. Yeah. Get it? You didn't even ask it back or anything. Well, because it stunned to me.

Yeah, that was a scary story. Did you get about the kidnapping at school? No. Okay. Yeah. That was the morning corny. Sort of. There you go.

Eddie, tell him about this contract. All right, so it's really easy. My son, my 10-year-old son, he plays sports, but he has the reputation of quitting before the end of the season. He kind of gets bored with the sport, and so out of nowhere, he wants to start playing baseball. He wants to play baseball, and we're like, no, you know, you're sure you want to do it. He's like, I want to play baseball. All right. So my wife and I were like, we have to make sure.

that you practice at least five days a week. Wow. And you do not quit. Did you buy them shoes and stuff? Oh, we bought them everything. Bats, new bat, shoes, everything, glove. And so if he breaks this contract, he owes us $100 from his own bank account. So let me put, hold on, let me.

You made him sign a contract? Yeah, he signed it. What's the contract say? That, that he cannot quit before the end of the season and he has to practice at least five days a week. He needs to care about baseball, basically. Well, you can't make someone care in a contract. Like, I have a contract with this company. They can't make me care.

I have to show up. He has to. So just is to fulfill it. Fulfill the contract. He cannot quit and he has to practice five days a week, bottom line. What a practice? What is that, does he have to go out? One hour, five days a week.

I don't think you work that hard on the show. I'll be honest with, Eddie. One hour five days a week? Five days a week. That is so insane for a 10-year-old kid that he's just learned this for. have a little fun. Here's our phone number. 877-Bobby.

Our producer Eddie, who does our videos, has a 10-year-old son. Son quits all the sports. So you made him sign a contract. Because he has a reputation of getting bored and quitting the sport before the season ends. You're going to make him want to quit by making it. He can. He owes me $100. And the best part is when we are practicing, he's like, I want to go home and be like,

all right, give me $100. We're done. We'll quit right now. He'll $100. And he's like, nope, no, we're good. Keep it in the ball. We got it. Don't you think the contract should more so be that he just doesn't quit the season and he rides it out?

Not that he has to practice an hour a day, five days a week. It's all, it's all inclusive. He has to show. It's like sandals resort. It's all inclusive. How's you're going to make it to major leagues if he doesn't practice five days a week? Come on. You laugh, guys.

This is the future of parenting. Writing contracts. You have to practice an hour with him. Yeah, that's tough for me. I know. I didn't think about that. And if you don't, I'll take a hundred dollars. That sounds awful.

Okay. That's the deal. I knew you guys wouldn't agree with me. No, no. We got people calling it. Hold on. Our video producer, Eddie, says, Hey, my kid sign a contract.

He's going to practice an hour every day for five days, and he's not going to quit baseball. Now, I have no problem with the contract part of it. I think that's interesting. Yeah. I think the fact that you're going to make him pay $100 out of his own money. That's the best part. I think that's a little odd.

Really? Why? Because Eddie signed a contract here to work. And if you quit, You don't owe me any money. Yeah, but I started thinking, like, what's a good thing that's going to, like, make him feel the pain from quitting? Like, he's got to realize that contract is a big deal.

And if he breaks it, it's going to be a bad result. Yeah, I see. Eddie's just knowing what's going to make his kid stick with it. Yeah, I don't want the $100. Yes, you do. I mean, it would be kind of cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, Robert, Texas.

Hey. You're a baseball coach? Yes, sir. What are you thinking about this? Hey, man, I think that contract's a little too much, man. My kids practice three days a week, and we practice for an hour and two hours a day. So five days a week, I think they're a little too much, man, especially with school and all that. How do you feel about his kid having to give him $100?

Hey, hey, no, no, no, no. That's a little much, too. If my kids don't like baseball, you know, they're going to get out of it, but, you know, we don't force them to do something. So I'm not going to make them pay me $100 they want to do it. But look, from Eddie's dad's point of view, his son is known to be a quitter at sports. And then Eddie's making an investment, like you bought the bat and the gloves and the whatever. That's going to be a parent. I know, but it's in a way it's like his son paying them back for what they invested if he decides to quit.

I see that. I see that. But the five times a week is a little extreme. Todd, South Carolina. Hey, how's it going? Good, buddy. What's going on? Tell me what you think. I don't think it's a good idea. I went through that when I was younger. I was forced to play sports all the time.

time and when I graduated high school, I didn't want to play anymore. That was it. So it burnt you out? I was forced to, yeah, it burned me out. It was too much. I hope your kid sues you, Eddie. Speaking of contract, I hope he gets upset. But Eddie's not forcing his kid to play.

The whole reason this thing starts is because he wanted to play baseball. I didn't want to play. I said, do you really want to? He's like, I really want to. Okay, but you're not quitting. Sign here. Sign here. Listen, let me just ask the question about parenting.

I have no kids of my own. But isn't part of being a parent also going through those times? with your child whenever they realize they don't like something. And maybe he doesn't like baseball. Yeah. And so, okay, that's part of being a parent. He doesn't like baseball anymore. Then we're going to finish the season and you don't have to sign up for the next season.

Bobby, how would you handle letting, I mean, because Eddie, it is an investment when your kid decides they want to play a sport. So how would you handle Eddie's son always wanting to quit things? I would let him play baseball and I would get him the stuff. But then I wouldn't make him pay me money and I wouldn't make him practice X amount of a week. But he only has to pay if he quits and doesn't practice five times a week. The practice parts of the time.

And the only reason I did five times a week is because he's never played baseball in his life ever. And at 10 years old, he wants to start. Like everyone's been playing on his team has been playing since they were four, dude. And so I'm like, dude, we got a lot of grounding makeup. But you're not a sports guy. You don't play sports. No, but I know the basics of baseball. Do you?

Yeah. Like we're working on grounders, pop flies. And then I'm teaching him how to run the bases. Does he think you're a good athlete? Oh, yeah, for sure. And then I'm keeping it on. on Major League Baseball now since it's on and I'm like, watch it, sit there and act like I'm watching

and he's just like, damn, dad really likes baseball. How good of an athlete do you think you are really? Five. Out of ten? Yeah, out of ten, because I can hang. I'm not like home run hitter or anything, but I can hang with everyone, basketball, baseball, football. Do you think you're the worst athlete on this show?

No. Who's worse than you? Lunchbox. Oh, they're racing tomorrow. Yeah. Eddie's running forward and lunchbox is running backward, a mile. Yeah, I've already practiced this weekend. Well, how fast you're on your mile?

So I job did. I didn't try to sprint. I just jogged it. At baseball practice. I did just a little over 11 minutes. Baby. Oh, do you want to make you about 11 minutes?

Yeah. Running forward. Yeah, running forward. Is that slow? That's terrible. Yes, that's considered jogging. I jogged. Lunch bikes did a backward mile yesterday?

No. He did. What was this time? What was this time? I'm not going to take my exact time. Let's just say it was under 10 minutes. Oh. Backwards.

Backward miles. That's amazing. Eddie. Tomorrow that happens. Power walk. that in like 11 minutes. Are you serious? Like, meanwhile I was at the mall.

Like, they'd be there. Amy's still upset that Morgan number two was offered a lingerie spot. Like off the air, Amy goes again, oh. So again, I didn't even get asked about the lingerie spot. Yeah, I know. It's just like, it's one of those moments

where I was like, yep, okay, I've crossed the line. I've hit that. I'm now the old girl on the show. No, I don't think you're the old girl. Oh, no, I am. At least by and, and not only that, by 15 years. You're a mom.

All the other girls are 15 years younger. Oh, let me tell you about Amy being a hater. Can I do the math? Let's do an Amy Hater story. Oh, what? So I don't spend a lot of time with Morgan No. 2 or Hillary

or a phone screener outside of the show. And so we were at the Red Cross Award. And I say, hey, Morgan number 2 and Hillary, let's take a picture. And it was me and Morgan number two and Hillary. It's just not being a hater. I love it. And Amy goes, oh, I see.

you're trying to get the young models in the picture. And I was like, no, I'm just taking pictures with the... Okay, first of all, I didn't say it in that tone, and they were standing side by side, and you were, like, they were holding the award, almost like the briefcase models, you know, and dealer-no-dealer. I got you like the arm candy. They did look like his archie.

Two pretty young girls standing side by side, and I said, oh, are there your models? That's not a hater comment. Amy, I'm kind of... That's like a compliment to Hillary and Morgan. I've kind of with you, because I may have mentioned it right. I said, look at his arm candy. Good job, Lowe's.

There's no arm can. But, Amy, did you want to maybe be part of that picture? No, it's fine. I wasn't even, nobody asked me. See? Nobody asked me in lunchbox. Lunchbox and I used to be on the right and the left. You were.

You were. We did like 10 pictures together. Now I get it. There's younger, pretty. Oh, my. Oh, maybe. This is to be the arm can. Lunchbox and I, what?

What? Okay. You just made it a thing. So I'm joining you. It wasn't a thing. Speaking of 24. year old. Morgan number two. Hey, what's a 24 year olds care about?

So there's now a pizza in a bag. Walmart is reported to be loading their stores with this jerky flavor that's Supreme Pizza, pepperoni pizza, and buffalo pizza. So it's a jerky that tastes like pizza or a pizza that tastes like jerky? Yeah, and so it's like a

slice of pizza in jerky. It's really bizarre, but people say it tastes so good. It's jerky, but it's called pizza in a bag. Oh. That's jerky that tastes like pizza. And that's what 24-year-olds care about. Maybe if you cared about stuff like that, I'd be like...

Well, what? We could start doing. What do 37-year-olds care about? That's where everyone takes a nap. And I'll be talking about, like, face cream. I'll tell you what I did this morning, though. I left my house. Time marches on.

I left my house, and I turned around and went back home because I didn't take my fiber. Oh. Yeah. That old fiber. You're metamusal. Yeah, that's true. Los Angeles police are hunting for the prolific funeral burglar who will break into mourners' homes while they're saying goodbye to their loved ones. Oh, that's just sad.

I know. These burglars, they search the obituaries. They find out when the funerals are. They go find their house. When the funeral is, they break in. Oh, that's so terrible. Wow, that's bad. Okay.

But. Just end it there. No, but. It's smart. They're doing their research. They know no one will be home. So you have to give them credit for having a plan and it being a pretty smart plan. I don't have to give them credit for anything.

They're robbing people. Okay. And they're robbing them at their already most vulnerable time. Yeah, it's double wrong. It's sort of like when they do these athletes, like if there's the Super Bowl or the World Series, they go and break into their home because they know they're out of town. Yeah, but when I'm gone, I have somebody at my house. Like, I would think someone like, for example, Rob Grinkowski,

who was robbed during the Super Bowl, I think I probably put someone at my house if I have that, he's loaded. And he's got tons of money. Yeah. And he doesn't live behind the gate. Top of the line security, all that stuff. Yeah, that's weird to me.

Yeah. Because I'm not Rob Grunkeowski, and somebody's in my... If I'm on my Instagram and I'm not at my house, somebody's in my house. Yeah. Because I'm not going to say I'm not at my house. And you have security. I mean, because by that logic,

someone can just look at your red... hoodie comedy tour and be like. Well, I guess it's in Pittsburgh on Saturday. Amy, don't get people ideas. But someone's always in his house. It doesn't matter. Yeah, someone's over there. And they are, someone that's highly trained. And they have lots of

guns. Unique set of skills. On them at all times. Yeah, they're actually pointing it at the door all the time. It's when I'm not there. So today is my birthday. And today I turn 38 years old. Look at that. I made it. It told me I wouldn't make it to 30. They said that?

Wow. Yeah, they did. And so, you just like I have a quiet birthday here. They have some decorations in the studio, the red. Yeah, the girls blew up some balloons. Very kind of everyone. Is anything happening today that I should know about? Don't know anything about that.

I know one thing, but I don't know if I'm allowed to say anything, so. Why do you do that? Go ahead. You're such a child sometimes. It's like my 10-year-old over here. What do you mean? You can't. I don't know if I can't say anything. I hate surprises. Basically, you sang something.

Tell your boy right now. You already said. Okay. Go ahead, lunch. No, no, I don't know if I'm allowed to say anything. I don't know. Like, I don't know if it's still happening because of what happened this morning. I don't know. I have no idea.

Listen, I don't even know if I want to participate in the thing that's supposed to happen because I don't know your reaction. So I don't know. Well, if you're saying that, I'll agree with him on that. I don't know if I should do it either. Yeah. Yeah. Whatever he's talking about. Can I do it?

Just say this. I don't hate my birthday. Imagine if you're me and you're trying to do a show and everyone is dressed exactly like you. That's distracting all morning long. Not really. Everyone's red hoodies and fake glasses. I'm supposed to just talk to you normally when you're all dressing clown suits like me. Good point. So you're fine if something, let's just say, hypothetically, could be happening later.

During the show or after? After. Our listeners don't care then. It's not listening. Here's you. You're the one that cares. We're not doing it for the listeners. I do everything for the listeners.

Oh, that's me too. So I have this, the show, and then I have to go and do my audio book all day today today. Yeah. Oh. And then you're probably going to box at three. Amy? Amy. Don't give too much away?

Yeah, come on. Go ahead. And then you shower and eat and go to bed. It's fine. I'll hide from you guys. Mess on me. I'll go. Oh, we'll have you followed.

You can run, but this you can hide. Badly. Now it's an adventure. Can I hide from you guys? Now we're talking. Let me think about it. No. Okay.

Probably not in this scenario. This hypothetical. Hypothetical. If we were. If there were to be something later. Lunchbox, do anything happen at? I can't say. I don't know it like a child.

I don't understand how it's like a child. He asked me a question. You say no. Just say no. No. No. We all did. Thank you, lunchbox.

The Lutchmucks is like, I don't know if I can tell you about something that's happening for you later, but I don't know that I feel comfortable with this. I was supposed to keep my mask. Is there something happening tonight, NLR? Oh. Why are you doing that, but? Yeah. He's okay. I can't.

Yeah. I mean, what am I going to do? All right. Thank you, buddy. I appreciate it. that. Dang. Guys, I had no choice. I did use the NLR card. Netflix

looking for a professional binge watcher. They have recently listed a new job opening for what they call an editorial analyst of original content. It's basically a professional binge watcher. And so there's no word on how much the job pays. Would you be good at this job? Yeah. It'd be really

good. I get... I've had two episodes of anything. I started to get fatigue. All the Netflix originals are pretty good, though. I watch that wild, wild country. Anybody seen that yet? No. Okay. I've started and what? Yeah. I'm not done yet. So don't, please don't tell me anything. Well, it's a documentary. So it's happened.

I know, but I'm not even, I'm not like you. I'm not even Googling because I don't, I want to watch it as it's unfolding. But I cannot believe that I've never heard of this in my life because it's real. In Oregon, in the 80s. That was shocking to me that I didn't know anything about it. Like, it's big news. And I never heard of it. And it happened right here in America and you're like, what? It's a six-part series on, Netflix called Wild Wild Country. Where was that in history class?

They didn't put that in my books. Although our books, we didn't have anything recent in history books. Yeah, it was all old. It was all the old stuff. Like kids now would have stuff from the 80s. Okay, well maybe they have it now in U.S. history. But they probably don't have books. Do you kids have books out of or is it all like tablets?

They don't have textbooks. You're right. No, we don't. No, it's all in worksheets. My kids are tablets. That's crazy. Do you have to buy the tablets for them? Well, they use tablet. They're school-issued tablets that they keep at school. What I recommend a Netflix show, you?

Oh, well, right now I'm watching El Chapo. Still? Yeah. Do you watch that with the kids? No. Dang, that has squar them for life. No, no, but I will give the warning like I do. Anytime I'm going to talk about it.

It is a Spanish show, so the English is dubbed over, so you cannot focus on their mouths too much. Lunchbox, anything you're watching on Netflix? Luther. Okay. Yeah. Talked about that. Crime detective. So good. Is it a Netflix original or is it from another network? I have no idea.

Eddie? Well, since I'm doing baseball right now, I've watched this documentary about the fastest pictures in the world. It's pretty good. What's it called? I don't know. Something like a no hitter maybe or something. Did you watch it or did you just start it? Search.

No, I watched it. Search baseball and it comes up. It's only two. Is anybody checked out girls incarcerated since I told you all to start watching that? Girls incarcerated. Yes. About the young girls that are locked up. I don't even want to click that because I don't want them having that in my history of Netflix.

No. It's Netflix. I'm just saying it's if you like locked up the adult version, then this one is fascinating, but it will just want to make you love on young people. I think it's a good thing to put out there because we've got not like that. Like just, it just makes me hurt. So it's real, it follows real girls in real prisons? Yes.

I am in. I knew you would be. I like that. It's crazy. As a crime drama, I'm in for it. You can just see the hurt. And then these are the kind of kids that grow up that are later incarcerated. And it's like, gosh, if we could just make them feel loved somehow.

That's prison shows like me uncomfortable. I know. I don't like them. I don't either. They're interesting. And you know what else comes back this week? Jersey Shore. Get ready.

I saw a promo for that. Jersey Shore family vacation. The old cast. Yeah, they're going on vacation together. Remember my cousin, skate prison? That was awesome. I guess I have a prison thing. A lot of my family's been in prison.

over the years. That's true. And so, but yeah, if you're new to the show, my first cousin was in the penitentiary, not just jail, but he's in the penitentiary. And it was a national news story for a week. Oh, we watched him on the news, like a slide through. What was that like the entrance thing? Like he was in his uniform. It's like where you, you know, past paperwork. Yeah, it was like the mail slot or whatever. And he was just crazy. And he crawled through and he had a getaway car, which was like your other cousin. No, I'm not, I don't, listen. I don't know anything about it. I've got...

I've got... I've been on the record. I know nothing. Oh, like I felt I was just laughing and then I stopped to, like, I instantly feel bad. Like, you're... That's the closest I... You're the closest I come to that,

like, actually knowing someone that has family with a history like that. And that's hard. Yeah. Yeah. We had jail. Jail was a part of life. Not always the penitentiary. Uncle wasn't in the pen for a long time.

Cousins. I have another cousin that did some terrible, terrible stuff in jail for his whole life. But I got a couple really good cousins too. But yeah, no, no, no. Yeah, jail was like a real, I get uncomfortable watching that stuff because it just feels like, ooh.

I've had three uncles in the pen. But they were just trying to make an extra buck. Here's Eddie trying to relate now. No, I'm serious. I don't want to relate to that. and the pen? Yeah, man. They were trafficking drugs

from like South Texas to San Antonio and they got caught all three of them. Well, I don't know if they worked for him but... Do you know them?

No, my uncles, yeah. Well, I don't know all my relatives. Yeah, well, I have, yeah, my sister had 13 brother and sisters so I have a lot. Yeah, a lot of cousins,

a lot of uncles. But your sister had 13 brothers and sisters? My mom. My mom had 13 brothers and sisters. That means I have like 300 cousins. I think Eddie's making this up

as he's going. Not really. I got a couple things. One, our producer Eddie, who does our video content on the website and on our socials, he was out watching a movie with his kids, right, when you saw Kevin? Yeah, when I saw Kevin from Better Than Ezra? Yeah, so I'm a big Better Than Ezra fan, and when we did our million-dollar show, The Raging Idiots this year at the Riemann, Kevin came and played with us, and so here's

Better Than Ezra. It's a huge fan as a kid, so it was cool for me. And Eddie sees them, but Eddie gets offended because Kevin didn't recognize it. Yeah, because we had just played, like Bobby said, the Rhyman show with him. And I felt like we connected on stage a little bit. Months ago, though. Months ago. But then we're at the movie theater.

He was actually sitting on my row. So for him to get by, I had to get up with, you know, and his popcorn was right. I was like, hey, Kevin, what's up? He looks at me and goes, hey, and keeps on walking. Like, Eddie, like, he didn't recognize me. And it's awkward because I don't want to be like, hey, dude, Eddie, you know, raging idiot's Bobby Bone Show. We just met like two months ago.

But that's not awkward. If you expect that from him. I didn't. We left it as like, oh, maybe he's just a fan. Hopefully he thought that about me. Okay, he's just a fan. No big deal. Now it's not awkward.

But if I would have done all that and then he would have been like, no, I really don't remember you from the stage. Like, then that would have been really awkward, hurt my feelings kind of thing. So I'm going to stop doing that. I'm done. I'm done saying hi to people that I think may know me. Or just introduce yourself as who would, hey, I'm Eddie.

I work with Bobby Bond. But then you get the, yeah, I know who you want. are, come on. What do you want? That's okay. Wouldn't you rather have that than the awkward like, like, huh? I think I'm going to stop just doing that. I'm just going to act like I didn't see them.

Isn't that what you do, Bones? Like, kind of act like you don't see people? That's a lunch box, boy. No, let me tell you. I, like, I don't hear people all the time. Like, this weekend, my wife and I, we were eating a chick flail. We were sitting out of the outside. Stop.

No, we were. And someone drives up in their car, and they go, hey, lunchbox! I was sitting there and my wife goes, someone's yelling. at you. And I was like, great. Hey guys, I was like, oh, and I went and said hi to the family in the car. I thought your point of the story was that you ignore people. No, I tried to, but my wife was like, hey, and she pointed at him. She goes, they're yelling at you.

It's like, thanks, wife. I never go bother famous people because I don't want to be, I don't want to be bothersome. So I wouldn't, I wouldn't have said anything. But even if there's a chance that they know who you are. I don't say hi to you. I won't bother. If someone says hi to me, absolutely I'll talk to them. But I don't bother people.

Yeah. Like, you say to listeners that if you're a fan of someone, you should always tell them, hey, I'm a fan. Yeah, I just... As long as they're not with their kids or eating. Yeah, but you've had popcorn, Eddie's Day. Popcorn and Coke. Hey, Kevin.

Hey, man, what's up? Yeah, but it's eating. I just don't bother people. Yeah, I know. Just for me, I feel like I'm bothersome. And then you have to do the... I'm terrible at small talk. Hey, so, how about that cloud, huh?

Weather. Kind of crazy lately. Holidays, huh? Easter bunny. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. What? What?

That's good. What? What? What? A listener will yell at lunchbox and five feet away and he will not even look up. I'm telling you, I did it this weekend.

They were sitting right there in the drive-thru. Why not? Like, you wouldn't even have this job if it weren't for listeners. Oh, you got them. You got them. Yes, you should be... That's true, but I was nice

and I gave them something and everything. You gave them something? Yeah, I gave them the Chick-fil-A tray I was eating off of. I was like, here, this kids can put this up in their room. Wait, so you gave them something that wasn't yours. A tray?

Yeah, you know, the tray that you take your food out on? I had it, and I was like, oh, kids, you want this? They're like, no, I was like, no, take it. Lunchbox gave you something. And so I made them take it. Put it in their car. And you referred to yourself as Lunchbox.

And you thought they should hang that up because you're such. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. Because I'm a celebrity. They got an item from a celebrity. Pretty cool. Interesting. Okay.

Folks, it's your buddy and mine. Mr. Bobby bones. Let's go. Tomorrow morning at this time we will start the race. Lunchbox runs backward. Eddie runs frontward. And they're running a mile. And so the people have spoken.

They're picking lunchbox. What? Who? I do. Thousands and thousands of people. Are they out of their mind? He's running backwards. Eddie, you admitted your forward mile was over 11 minutes.

Yeah, and lunchbox said he did what backwards? Under 10. That's ridiculous. He's lying. Okay, so Eddie will run frontward and lunchbox will run backward. If you're beat by lunchbox running backward, what does it say about you? Well, obviously, I don't know how to run because the human, like, natural form to run forward, that's normal. Backwards, like, he's going to fall and hurt himself.

My prediction, he won't even finish the race. Wow. What do you think I'm jumping over hurdles? I mean, where am I going down? One of the turns, you're going to miss your step. May or may not fall off the track, hit the back of your head, you're done. Okay, but here's the deal. I think even if lunchbox does fall, he'll still get up and be you.

What does that say to you that no one has paid me? I mean, the fact that people think that about me, like, dude, I have, I'm physical, physically able to do this. I'm an athlete. Out of 10, I rank five as an athlete. I can do this. Okay, tomorrow morning at this time. I'm going to beat him so bad. And I'm not even going for just like a little win.

Yeah. Like even if I have like a, like a five-minute lead, I'm just going to keep going and just. Five-minute lead. Oh, yeah. What do you think you're running a five-minute mile? No. Dude, I ran 11.5 minutes on my practice. And you're going to cut that in half?

I'm going to try. Okay, hey, we have eight people on the show. Who's your vote for who's going to win this tomorrow? Eddie, frontward or lunchbox backwards? Be real, everyone. Oh, don't fake it? Amy, your vote? Lunchbox.

Lunchbox backward. Quiet, Mike? Lunchbox. Lunchbox backwards. Morgan number two? Lunchbox. Lunchbox back. Wow.

Hey, Raymond, audio producer. Eddie. Oh, Eddie. Front word. The gambler that wins. Your percentage on gambling Ray is pretty good, right? Pretty good.

Yeah. Hillary, our phone screener, what do you think? Lunchbox. Lunchbox backwards. Wow. It comes down to me, huh? So are they all putting money? Vegas doesn't have this lineup, Eddie.

It's not up yet. It's still working on. All right, bones, come on. Dude, break it down. I'm running forward. Okay, let me break it down. Eddie is just not... Nothing about Eddie's athletic at all, ever.

Is Eddie fast? No. But here's the thing. He is running forward. Thank you. Guys, the law of nature. It's not a compliment that you're running forward. It's just a statement. He said, thank you.

It's true, good point. What am I running? You're running backwards. Thank you. I think that it's going to be close. No chance. And I think I'm going to go with lunchbox backwards. And the winner gets $100 to you and $100 of the charity of your choice.

I love it. This will be the easiest $200. I've ever made and I got to start thinking of a charity. Tomorrow at this time. Is there a chance you throw up? No. Can you even run a mile? Yes.

I totally, I just ran one. No, you jogged. This weekend. That's true. I jogged it. If you did 11 minutes, you didn't run anything. You strolled. I may have taken a couple of pauses.

Tomorrow, right at this time, the big race happens. Most of the crowd is going lunchbox backward. Wow, what does that say about our faith in you, Eddie? They just don't know what they're talking about. Okay. I watched the second episode of Roseanne because I did give the first one not the best review

I enjoyed the first episode but I thought their acting was a little weird the laugh track was a little weird I watched the second episode it got a lot better yeah it's good I now think it's good and so the political side never bothered me I just think people feel different ways I have no problem with that and they're funny about it

yeah you're just not going to get me right up by politics at this point and I thought it identified with probably someone who lives in a rural part of Illinois. And I had no issue with that ever. But I watched it. And they didn't even talk politics in the second episode. And I did like it.

I watched it and thought, man, I can really see myself going back to it. And I didn't think I would have in the first episode. So the old Roseanne, didn't it end where you said that Dan had died? Well, she was writing a book. So I was so confused how they brought it back. So what they said in the first episode was she had like a manuscript in the garage. And she was like,

I guess this is never going to. He's like, well, you killed the best character at the end of the last, you know. So they addressed it. Okay. It was just her book writing. Got it. But it had 18 million people that watched it. I think on DVR was more than that.

Biggest show in like 10 years. And I think most people watched it from the nostalgia, but I think it was good enough that people are going to come back. I enjoyed the new Roseanne. And so. Yeah, and they were, I don't remember if you mentioned this, but they picked it up for second season. I didn't mention that. You're right. They already did.

Hey, Brandy in Texas. Hello. Hello. Hello. What up? Well, I'm a whole lot of nothing headed to work. How are y'all this morning? Really good.

What do you want to say? Well, I was listening about the big race tomorrow. Yeah, lunchbox is going to run backward. Eddie's going to run frontward and it's a mile race. Okay, but they're running at the same time? Yeah, yeah. They're straight up, like go and then they run. Okay, I think Eddie might have a slight advantage.

Have you ever seen Eddie do anything athletic? No. Eddie also claims he was a three-star football recruit in high school. That was a long time ago, yeah. And we don't see any pictures. We've looked up every database. We can't find anything about him. But why does she think he has an advantage?

Well, I think that Eddie's right in the fact that, I mean, you can naturally run better running forward. But because he's going to be able to keep pace with lunchbox, I think he might be able to just tweak it out at the end. All right. I'm not keeping pace with lunchbox. Oh, you're giving them in the dust. You're dominating. And I'm not looking back. Interesting.

Okay. But that's tomorrow. Yeah. At this time. Yeah. You realize I've been running forward my whole life. Yeah. Lunchbox has not.

Okay. And you ran backward a little bit. Yeah. I ran a mile. It's no problem. No problem. In soccer, you don't think there's any running back on defense. Oh, great.

Good point. That's such a good point. He does play soccer. every night too. You're going to run with a soccer ball? I can if you want me to. Dang. Tomorrow the race happens. Chipotle is testing a tequila slushy.

Oh, yummy. Really? See, that sounds like a margarita. It's like a margarita. Yeah. So I don't drink. I never taste a tequila. But what is it about tequila lunchbox? There you go, ooh, tequila's good. I just like to taste. I don't know what makes it taste good, but tequila tastes good. It's hard to describe

a taste. Like, it's hard to describe a color. But what is, does tequila burn? Does tequila? I don't think it burns. I think it's just smooth. And it's just like, um, that was good. That was yummy, yummy in my tummy. Amy, describe tequila.

I'm not a tequila fan. Why not? To me, it's not yummy in the tummy. I do like a good margarita, but then it's all the other stuff in the margarita that makes it good. I guess there's a little triple sec, some sugar, some little salt, maybe lime. It's all the other things, but like I'm not throwing back tequila. But my friends that love it, they love to sip it. So tequila's from Mexico.

Yeah. What's Mexican about it? Well, it comes from the agave plant or whatever, the cactus. But does it taste like... Mexico? Embrygo. No. It comes from there.

It's like vodka's Russian. Tequila's Mexican. And what's the difference than taste on the palate, Eddie and yours? Oh, vodka's way better. No. Eddie. I mean, tequila's like, it's strong, dude. It burns.

You feel pretty manly when you take a tequila shot, for sure. It's dark. If I were to have my first shot, let's say taste my birthday. Oh, okay, okay. Oh, ever clear. No, no, wait. What's ever clear? No, no, no, no.

That's like rubbing alcohol. You don't want that. It's terrible. It's like the strongest. Yeah, dude, you don't want that. Clear. It's like isopro alcohol? It's bad.

Okay, so if I get one shot, what am I doing? Well, you need something fruity. You're going to do coconut rum. Oh, sex on the beach. No, no, it's just straight. Yeah, Malibu coconut rum. That's good stuff right there. Why?

Because it's so light and. Yeah, it's fruity. It's light and it'll taste real good. All right. Bring it in, boys. All right. Here's the day. Can you imagine? Yeah.

Nah, you wouldn't do that. On 38, a birthday that matters nothing. Nice random day. Remember the, if you do start drinking, remember, liquor before beer, you're in the clear. Beer before liquor, never sicker. There's a lot of truth to that. And remember with snakes. A red and yellow, kill a fellow, red and black, venom black.

Okay, thank you. We're talking over the intro of the song. Dang it. Sorry. Old Dominion, sorry. Yeah, Francine in Fresno. Good morning. Good morning, Body, Bo.

What up? We're meeting right now, or we met this weekend? Well, of course, I couldn't get a ticket. Your show's sold out, like, instantly. Oh. Oh, well, I'm sorry about that. You could have called that. I got you in there.

Oh, well, it's actually, that's a good question that you bring up there because you are, like, high celebrity status because it's hard to even get through to the call screener for her to, you know, put me on the radio. Well, I'm sorry that it was so hard for you. Can I help you with something? No, I'm just wanted to let you know I'm a big fan. I just discovered you like the end of last year.

I started listening to you guys and Amy and lunchbox and you guys get me rolling in the morning. Well, thank you very much. So you're a new listener. A listener, but a very, very big fan of the show. Oh, thank you. Honeymoon face. Oh, for sure. Yeah, yeah.

Let me tell you this. If you listen long enough, I will disappoint you. Like, I mean, you'll be upset with me at some point. So as a new listener, let me say that I apologize in advance. But if you'll hang with me, I think that I can hopefully guide you more than not. I believe that you will guide me more than not. Because look at you and Amy, it sounds like you guys have been friends forever, and she's still there right with you.

Yep. She is. I mean, I'm paying her. How do you get paid? Yeah, she doesn't give me. She wanted to kill me this morning. I did not. That is such an exaggeration.

You're trying to kill me this morning. Oh, my. So, listen, I appreciate that. I think if anyone knew he's listening to the show, this is how it works. Someone hears this show and goes, what is this? These people, we don't have good voices. We can't talk. We're not professional broadcasters other than we're getting paid.

And there aren't a lot of rules. I mean, actually, I'm the only one that knows what's happening on the show. I have my computer up and I have a list of everything that I think we're going to talk about. Sometimes we get to it. Sometimes we don't. but nobody else. Eddie, Lunchbox, Amy, they don't know what we're going to talk about.

Nope. Let's be fair. You guys don't know what's coming up in my pile. No, we don't. That's the one segment, yeah. But just so you know, that's why it sounds so rough at times and also sounds real is because there's no plan

except for what I plan at home and before I come in. Does that make sense? Yes, well, you guys, I would call you guys professional actors in. Well, we don't have nothing scripted. Hold on, let me check my script. What are you both say to that, lunchbox?

Oh, we are not actors. We are real humans. We keep it real. there you go. All right, hey, Francine, I appreciate you being a new listener. Thank you. Yes, well, thank you so much. You know, and actually, I did get two sweatshirts from your concert, though,

so that's really nice. Well, look at you. Yeah, I just was hoping it said Bobby Bowens on it, but it didn't say Bobby Bones. Oh, you must have got like a station promotional sweatshirt, then, not one of mine. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, you know what? I'm bummed out now.

Yeah, I can probably help you with that. Hey, put her a hole. Let's get her a red sweatshirt. Right, just put her a hole, get her info. All right, cool. Hey, I got you, Francie. I got to go, though, okay? Hey, have a great day.

You two, don't leave. Don't hang up. Yeah, we'll get her a sweatshirt. I'm going to one of you guys. Everybody wore them into work today, and I was like, take them off. Everybody had fake glasses and red sweatshirts. Like, I wasn't supposed to be distracted the whole time, but everyone looking exactly like me or who were doing a show.

And then Amy's like, you want me to go tell them? I was like, please. Go ahead. No, no, I didn't, no, I didn't even have to say, do you want me to go tell them. You said, Amy, go tell me. Okay, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool. All right. Bobby Bones.

I was watching American Idol last night. I mean, I vested a bit because, you know, I worked with a lot of the people on there. Yeah. I can't say who yet. But I'm on next week. Next Sunday is when I start mentoring. And so here we go. Let's see what happens, you know.

Let's see if I can mentor them to a career of success. But there's some good ones. I was telling Eddie off the air that, I mean, this show's really good to me now. I got a bit tire some of the, What are they auditions? I felt like it was a lot of episodes of that. And I don't want to watch anything for two hours. I don't care what.

No show on TV. So, but I thought it was good. Like there's this girl named Maddie Poppy. She's a singer-songwriter. We were just so young. How didn't we know? And they're in Hollywood Week where they're playing, they weren't from to top 50 last night, I think.

And so they're on Tonight again. and they get to 24. But this kid named Cade, who's a rock guy. He's playing guitar and he did Portugal Demand. I guess that is Portugal. That's good. Yeah, yeah. I guess he slowed it down.

So it just, you know, this one girl, Michelle, play a clip of her doing, I'm Coming Out, Diana Ross. Oh, yeah. Come on. Yeah, it's pretty good. She sounds good. Yeah. It's interesting. It's weird for me because I know who makes it.

And you can't say anything. Harper Grace, this is an original. She's only 16. Rest in peace. I'm begging heaven, please. Anyway, it happens next Sunday. I'm on if you're watching the show. If not, I hope you do watch it.

Because I get paid for every person that watches extra. Wow. I'll make my whole family watch them. Yeah, nickel. Every person watches I get extra nickel. That's pretty impressive. Tell your friends. Oh, Brittany's on.

Hey, Brittany and St. Louis. What's happening? Hi. What's up? Bobby? Thank you. Hi. I'll let you know how much I love the Friday morning dance party. Oh, thank you very much. We enjoy it as well. It is where I like starts my weekend off and I get so excited for it. Like set alarm for it. Like I love it so much.

Man, how about that? Well, thank you very much. What do you do for a living? I go to school. Yeah, how old are you? 28. actually today. Oh, today's your birthday as is mine. And Chris Jansen, by the way. Really?

So don't forget to text them. I'll do it right now. What's the rule on birthday text? Do you have to respond to them all? No. You don't? Not at all. No, no, no, no.

No, no, there's too many. You can't be getting that many where you can't even do like a heart or thank you. What if I send a heart back to everyone? That's all that would be funny. That'd be real funny. Please. What's the rule on birthday text? Respond or no.

Do you have to or not? Yeah. Or do you only respond to people that you're really like? Right. The ones you're really close to? Because like on Facebook, you get all these people. I'm not talking Facebook. Someone that has your phone number that's texting. No, text, no way. Because like when I announce my baby, I get like 100 texts. I don't have time to sit there and reply to everyone. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah, I understand that. But I don't have time to write thank you to every single person on a text. They're saying it out of whatever. Okay. Thanks. Cool. You said, happy birthday. I'm moving on. You don't need a thank you for saying happy birthday. So you're just going to ignore it? No, no, no.

The praise is your birthday. You're not supposed to thank them for wishing you a happy birthday. It's your birthday as a celebration. You don't need to thank them for celebrating you. I kind of agree with them. Okay. I've just been responding back with thanks. Oh, you are?

You're responding? Wow, not even an emoji, but the word? I'm on my computer. If it's on my phone, I definitely just... You know that the prayer hands, that's like... Thank you. Yeah. But I always feel like I'm saying I'm praying for you,

and then I feel... That's what it feels like. Yeah. If I send prayer hands? Is that what it means? No, it means thank you. Oh, okay. Yeah, because it is like prayers.

But when I send it, I always feel like I'm sending I'm praying for you. What's nothing wrong with that? You know what? That's nice. It's okay. Well, I apparently have secret birthday plans that Amy has something happening tonight. But my new goal is to hide. You can't hide, my friend.

It's this fun game. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, good luck, fine to me, folks. Hide and seek. Yep, so, yeah, we have a big birthday plan tonight. How late, though? Your schedule. Yeah, don't worry.

Don't worry. It's on your time. It's your time. Don't worry. There's nothing. Oh, you've already built it up now, so it's got to be big. Who built it up? Lunchbox?

No, I did not build it. Big, big, big. This thing might as well be big now. Let's let loose. Oh, great. Now it's going to be a letdown. Bobby's come to play. Bobby's coming to play.

No, I thought you were hiding. Yeah, I might. But I want it to be big if it does find me. Oh, great. Okay, we good. By the way, listeners sending up some breakfast. Staff did, right? Yeah, staff did from Austin.

Thank you for that. Thank you for all the birthday. All the birthdays celebrations over there on Twitter. Except for when you wear this thing, close him. No, thank you. No, thank you. Yeah, I walk in everybody's wearing glasses like me. Like, I'm supposed to do a show not distracted by that.

No, it's kind of weird. I'll be honest. Here's Amy's Pile of Stories. Sam's Club is now selling a nine-pound tub of Oreo frosting. Comes in a giant bucket. And you could frost, I think, like 200 cupcakes if you wanted to. or if you just want to sit and eat the entire bucket, it's going to be 936 grams of fat.

Wow. Yeah, I don't really convert that in my head. I don't know what's fat as good as not. That's a lot of fat. What, like, are calories, is it say? 16,380 calories. Wow. Sounds so good.

That's pretty good, huh? Yeah. Oh, yeah. What else? Best. So amazing. A new study has found that a low phone battery causes people major stress,

like more stress than a job interview. Yeah, because if your phone cuts off, you lost all contact. I've not gotten a bunch of jobs. My phone has never died. That low battery, the red, like 1%, that doesn't stress me out at all. Yeah, but you know the type of person

to get stressed out by that. I know, but some of my friends, it literally, if it goes below... I don't get below 50%. It's like a really big deal. A gas tank and my cell phone battery. I don't give it the opportunity to fail me. I roll on zero.

In fact, I'm like, I wonder how much further I can go on zero. So don't let that stress you out. Chill a little bit. Did you know today is national peanut butter and jelly day? When's the last time you had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich? Never. I hate peanut butter. I've never had peanut butter.

What kind of sandwiches did you eat as a kid? Mustard. Ooh. Wait, do you hate the sandwich because you've never tried it? He doesn't know. You need to try it then, dude. I don't like peanut butter. That's why.

I hate. The peanut butter makes me want to vomit. So like mustard and bread? Yeah, sometimes we can't afford meat. Yeah, no, I know. I knew where he was going, Amy. I was like, more mustard talk. No, I didn't. I'm not saying that as a joke. I used to eat like mayonnaise.

What did my mother feed me? Like, this is so bizarre. But white bread, mayo, and sour cream and onion chips. It was a potato chip sandwich and it was amazing. You know, I watched sometimes the Americans that TV show on FX and was made in the 80s, and I watched what they eat. We just didn't know. Yeah.

Correct. Like, people, but is it because now we know, or is like, are people still eating that way? I think people still eat that way, but at least we know when we eat that way. Because my mom was like,

go grab another Debbie snack if you're hungry. And I just like, don't tell my children that. I'm like, I'm going to need that Debbie snack. If you're good in a week, maybe you can have it. I think it's education somewhat. In sugar. Yeah, I had no idea. Did you guys have any idea?

No. Maybe it was associated. economic thing too, maybe I just didn't. No, I think of the lunch I used to pack and it was like a nutter butter every day and a Coke and a... Oh, I drink a two liter every day through college, a Mountain Dew.

It was just what it was. I would finish working out, I'd go run, I'd drink a two liter bottom. Thirsty. Yeah. I didn't know any better. What else? Well, anyway, if you're looking to celebrate National Peanut Butter and Jelly Day, make yourself a sandwich. The worst beer has been announced.

Like, they did a taste test and I have the worst tasting beer. Is it a big brand? Yes. It's one that 100% if you drink, you've, beer, you've had it. Mad Dog is my guess. No, it's not a beer. It's not a beer.

Mad Dog's not a beer? Mad dog 2020, it's a malt liquor. It was never a beer? I would fact check that. Oh, you're thinking of Red Dog. Oh, Red Dog or Bud Ice. That was pretty bad. The worst, Corona.

You don't like Corona? No. Eddie? I'm going to go with Natural Light. Natty Light. Amy? Ding, ding, ding, ding. Eddie nailed it.

Is it the cheapest? Ellie, that's pretty cheap. Natural light overall has the worst rating in the world. And natural ice is second worst. So they own the market on bad. But it's like it's the cheapest. So, yeah. Get what you pay for.

Yep, that's true. I'm Amy. That's my pile. That was Amy's pile of stories. Mr. Bobby Bones. This is the Bobby Bones. You know, I spent the weekend. Listen to that Casey Musgraves album a bunch.

It was really good. Do you get to listen to any music at all, your mom or no? No. I mean, I'm serious. Like, Amy doesn't have time for anything anymore. Well, I mean, some Netflix I do, like El Chapo, but that's after the kids go to bed

and my husband and I are trying to, like, just, you know, unwind. So you watch it watching a drug cartel movie? Let's unwind. With a bunch of murder. Well, I will say this, her record came out, and I'm obviously a huge Casey Musgraves fan, but yeah it needed to be really good

to meet expectations because I had such high it was really good and it did my unfair expectations nothing worse than being a huge fan of somebody and then the record comes out

and you're like oh because that's happened to me before with a couple artists where I'm just like oh baby here we go finally and you listen to it and you're like oh man

what artists one of the older Ben Fold's records I remember coming out and I was like not loving loving loving it. Sometimes Ben Harper will do that to me. Yeah, he does that a lot.

But yeah, that's always a never, oh, one time John Mayer. Yeah? Yeah. Wow, John Mayer let you down. Well, again, it's just taste. And they have a lot of music that they put out, so not all of it's going to be. Yeah. People listen to the show that like it. Some days, we suck, man. Yeah. Yeah. For sure. It's a dog. Yeah, it's true. But I do. I really

liked the Casey Musgraves record. Like, there wasn't a song I deleted. And And usually when you download a record, you stream a record, you find a couple, even on record you don't like, and go, eh, I'll pass on that one. No, I like them all. Here's one I like to call it down, and it takes all right. Here's one I like to called Oh, What a World. I can see her happiness in this record. Mm-hmm.

Like, I can hear her happiness in the record. I'm like, man. Anyway, the record's good, and then it made me want to be happy. Oh, that's good. Yeah. I love that. Yeah. You put one in one hand and pooping another.

See what fills up faster. It's on my stepdad used to say. Oh, Arkansas key to say that? Yeah, that's cool. But he wouldn't say poop. He'd say a bad word. Oh. A study at a Northwestern University revealed that the number one regret that people have.

What do you think it is? Number one regret from people in their life as they get older. They're like this is the number one. Go ahead. Not experimenting, like more partners. More partners. Like, you know what I'm saying? Experiment.

So you wish you had an experiment a little more for marriage, what you're saying? Experiment with more partners. Yeah, experiment. I was trying to keep it PG. I didn't know how to say that. Oh. No. Well, there's two different things you say.

Experiment would be like you try different things. Yeah. I'm talking. Betted more partners. You just said you wish you to hook up with more women. Yeah. That's what you wish. But what you really said was you wish you to try other other than just women.

You can sell experiment with your wife. Okay. What I'm saying is... No, I get what you're saying. Slect with more women or if you're a woman slept with more men. Whatever. That's what I'm saying. Okay.

Okay, we get it. I mean, I really think we get it. No, you know, you're not getting it. I didn't think you guys understood. I think we got it, like, right when he said it, but... Okay, that's what he thinks. Yeah. Wish you would have...

Is it work too much? Work too much. Work too much. Too much. Eddie, what do you think of it? Oh, gosh. This is tough. I would say maybe, I mean, unpopular, but getting married too early.

Oh, wow. You know what I mean? We're getting a little too personal here. All of us, all of you guys said what you really fail in your heart. Oh. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. All of you.

All of you do. Lunch box goes. But mine was work too much. Like, I don't work too much. Now you're like, I needed more time with kids. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Lunchbox's like, oh, I should. And Eddie's like, I don't know, I'm just going on the limb here.

He goes, not not for personal, but got married too young. All right. And he's like, this is not going to be popular with my wife, but got married too young. Number five is money. Like regretting a stock tip that you didn't act on or losing money in a bad investment. Oh, yeah. That's a good one. Twitter.

No, but you guys didn't get a tip. I feel like this is a dumb one. I always wish I would have bought property in East Dawes. in the 80s. I mean, early 2000s even. I know, but had we done it in 80s. You were like four in the 80s, Amy. You didn't know anything about it?

I wish my parents had. Okay. Number four, wishing you had taken a more enjoyable career instead of chasing money. That's a good one. Yeah. No, I'm happy. No, I'd never chase money. Yeah.

A lot of people do, though, so yeah. I understand that. Only chased a career that I loved. Number three, education choices. You went to a better college. No, I like where I went. Amy's a graduate of Texas. Langebock's graduate of University of San Antonio, Texas.

University of Texas at San Antonio. I mean, it was fine. I wish I'd had gone to Kansas, but I couldn't afford it, and my grades weren't good enough, so, I mean, there's no regret there. Eddie? Sam Houston State. Could have done a little better. But I liked it.

I was going to Arkansas, but then my radio career came in. And since I was not chasing money, I was chasing fulfillment. I switched to Henderson State. Small liberal arts college. Number two, family issues, regretting not spending more. more time with a family member before they passed. Yeah. Oh, you always have that.

I have that. No matter what. I think so, too. You can spend every day with them and you still wish. Or how you treated them sometimes. Do you guys feel that about me? You treat me sometimes when you leave here? You haven't died yet.

No. Wait until you die and then we'll worry about that. Oh, okay. Number one is lost love. That's the number one most regretted thing is. Oh, you look back on a chick and you're like, oh, she could have been the one? Basically not getting married or being with a previous love. Wow.

And everyone's watching their tongues right now. I could see that. Yeah? Yeah. Was there one for you? Not one or anything. It's just ones that you're like... There's more than one?

What? Hold on. You guys are going to back me into a corner here. I'm just asking this. Lunchbox, is there somebody you like having to go, I could have definitely married them. I don't know about married. I don't know about married, but you could have seen if it had gone longer. You wonder.

Yeah, you wonder like, oh. oh, could we have ended up together if we would have been a little older and taking it more serious? Yeah. Yeah. For sure. There's more than one. I had two people that I loved before my husband, and I was devastated when they broke up with me and heartbroken. But it all worked out, and I see that.

Like, I don't ever. Sometimes, I mean, I guess I thought, like, oh, I wonder if we'd stayed together. But they're both happily married and have families, and it worked out how it was supposed to. Yeah. Maybe it just worked out because we broke up. Because they broke up with me and broke my heart. Yeah. Yeah.

I feel like I've had probably four awesome girlfriends and it could work with all of them. You have had awesome girlfriends. So. Yeah, there's that. So do you have the regret? No, not yet. Okay. But some of them are married and stuff.

But still, if you messaged them on Facebook, you could rekindle it if you wanted to. I don't know about that. I don't think so. With maybe some, but not all. Right, but some people say, oh, I don't think so. What are you alluding to? Do you hear about all these divorces because people go back to their old high school boyfriend or girlfriend on face of them and say, what up? And you're like, oh, I don't think it could happen.

It could happen. Everybody says, oh, I'm so happy in my marriage. It can happen. What are you so sure about it? Yeah, what are you so sure about? What are you saying? Amy said it could happen. Amy's like, it definitely wouldn't with some of them.

Yeah, what does that mean? Yeah, explain. I said there's, there's, okay. Of the four, one. There's one that you probably could right now and one that you probably couldn't. Okay. And you shouldn't.

Amy's being weird. Yeah, I don't know what you're saying. It doesn't matter. Yeah, there you go. Appreciate everybody today. Let's see. What do we learn today? You want to go first, Amy?

Yeah. Go ahead. We learned yet again. You don't like celebrating your birthday. That wasn't where I was going to go. That's not where I was going. Yeah, I mean, I'm not a big, I don't. hate my birth-day. But every, you know, it's like, every year, I don't know if you've grown or

changed. No, the answer is no. I never have. Matured? Nope. Yeah. But I don't know, I should take that back. I don't know that's a maturity thing. Like, it's a hurts thing. You're coming from a real place of childhood pain, but we have got to get over that. Yeah, cool. Like, you have to be okay with parties and people wanting to celebrate you. Like, we care about you and it's your birthday, so. Still holding on to that, huh? Yeah. Yeah. I thought she was going to bring up bra and panties thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that too. We learned that I'm old and not even considered for a panty spot.

Wait, wait, we didn't learn that you, you're the one who went with that. Morgan number two. She's 24. She's 24. They gave her the bra and panties commercial. Yeah, nobody even asked me about it. Normally I get a chance to say, ooh, all pasts. But it never even came my way.

You know, I think over the years, this is a place you need to grow. You know, I get it. There's some childhood hurt with not being offered things. No, now I know. It has nothing to do with that. It has to do with now, I guess I'm just not the, I'm not, there's other girls on the show and there's, they're younger and fresher. Yeah.

Yeah. I'm going to wrap that up. All right. We're going to go. Thank you for everything. Whatever. Thank you for everything. Hey, happy birthday.

Hey, everybody. Let's say it on three. One, two, three. Bye. Service opens doors And at American Military University, it can open doors for the whole family. If you have a loved one who served in the military,

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