The Bobby Bones Show - BONUS: Sore Losers: The Day After Raymundo's Wedding

Episode Date: December 21, 2020

Ray made the walk down the aisle and still complaining about being hung today. Tom Brady has the Bucs rolling and The Cowboys are historically bad. Mike McCarthy got one and only one thing right with the Cowboys this weekend. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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What up, everybody. I am Lunchbox. I know the most about sports. So I give you the sports facts. My sports opinion. because I'm pretty much a sports genius. Hey, what's the penis? I was also a groomsman in a wedding this weekend.

Okay. That's a good update to the intro, coach. You ready? What's up, everybody? I'm Eddie. I know the least about sports, but sports fan, watcher, who's who's, what's what's, Corona. Go, Ray.

I don't know why Eddie was like that because that might have been your worst intro of all time. I'll go ahead and pick it up. I mean, really, it's sports podcast. Sports is over for me. Good. What up, y'all? It's Sisson.

I'm from the north. alpha male. I'm a married man. I live on the west side of Nashville with my wife, Baser. Hey, that sounds great, coach. That is crazy. My wife. Coach, how does it feel? Like, honestly, it doesn't feel any different. It's no different, but it is, I mean, there's so much stuff that she already changed her name on Twitter, and it's weird seeing it as Laura Slater. I mean, she might have put her stuff out. in the middle of the ceremony.

Coach, it's a media world, of course. That's it. I mean, I went, I did the first Instagram pick. She changed her Twitter within two seconds of the marriage. I mean, guys, stuff happens fast and you've got to always hit the socials with this stuff. Guys, if you don't feel different after your wedding day, then something's

not right. You're a romantic coach. Eddie, what I'm saying is, it feels no different for Ray, because they were already living together. They were, everything is the same. They were already in the title. It's not about that, though. Except for they did. For the first time on Saturday night. Hey, coach here, without a Jimmy.

Guys, I waited seven years, boys. Okay, coach. No, but like, guys, other than that, there's a huge difference. Before the wedding day, you can always go, I'm out. Always. You can do that after the wedding. No, you cannot. That's called a divorce, and you're in to, you're in with, like, those things get dirty and nasty and gross.

You don't want to be part of the wedding. that. Ray has been married short enough time that he can do the annulment. Right now? Yep. He can do the annulment and it would be nothing. Thanks guys. Not a depressing topic at all. No. So we just went to the wedding this weekend, but Ray, real quick fact

about the annulment. You can always back out. Because you said it doesn't feel any different. Well, no, I mean, the stuff that did feel weird was her name changing and then I'm wearing this ring. I guess that stuff. Other than that, obviously it doesn't

feel any different. How much do you play with the ring? Hey, Ray, how much do you play with your Willie? No, no, no. Because when you first get married, you sit there and you fiddle with that ring a lot. Did you try to put the ring on your, hey, Ray, does it fit on other things or just your ring finger? I mean, coach, I just, I move on with my life. I type stuff. I move buttons on a board. I don't, I'm trying not to think about the ring. It really is annoying, so I don't know how long I will be wearing it for. One of the conversations I had with a bunch of married people at your wedding at your reception was, do you still have your wedding ring? And all of the guys that I talked to were all like, no, this is my third one, I think, because I lost my first two.

Coach, are you worried at all? You're going to lose that ring? Because I lost mine. Nah. I believe we have insurance on it, too, so who really cares? And Eddie, he told me it never comes off. And also, what an interesting topic you guys were talking about. How many wedding rings you've had?

You guys were hitting it hard at the wedding. Dude, I missed out on that conversation. Sounds fun, dude. They were crushing your wedding, man. Instead of crushing the open bar, they were crushing the... So how many wedding rings have you had talk? People are on the dance floor, dancing with hotties, getting white claws, and you were talking about wedding room counts.

I mean, you know how you know you're old is when you go to a wedding that has an open bar and you ask people, so, man, how many wedding rings have you lost? Because I've lost two. Oh, I've lost three. Let's be real, coach. I mean, there were only, what, 30 of us at the wedding. There weren't a lot of people, coach. But you can talk about something else besides how many wedding rings have been

We had been hanging out with the same people from one o'clock in that afternoon. What do you want to talk about at 8 o'clock at night? Brobs to the wedding planner on that one. I mean, good gosh. Can we update the grid to not include three hours of doing nothing and sitting there twiddling your thumbs until the wedding? I told lunchbox. I was like, dude, I feel like the guys that are managers at first.

fancy hotels that have to wear suits all day. It sucks. And then lunch is like like a car salesman. You got to get all dressed up and be on your feet in these dress shoes for hours upon hours of doing nothing. Because I didn't mind hanging out with you, Ray. That was fun. We watched football. We gambled a little bit. It was fun to hang out. But in a suit, it sucks. Right. So yeah, that's a good way to put it because I couldn't really drink.

I mean, it would, and it's like you can't lounge around or you get your suit all wrinkled. So it's like we're all standing up like car salesman, but we're selling no cars and nobody's really drinking, and we're all, basically the betting on the games was really what drove us through that time. Otherwise, it was pretty boring. Well, you had mimosas there, and I served me one. I'm like, you're not going to put a bottle of champagne in front of me and me not drink it. They were gone pretty quick, though. So I served one, coach, and really, when I got, I'm not kidding, when I got the bottle, two were already empty. The third was half full, so I filled my glasses up, coach, which left me.

maybe an inch left in the bottle. Well, then here comes one of the bridesmaids. It's like, where are all the champagne go? The bride wants champagne and it's all gone. They look at me. I'm the only one with a mimosa in my hand. I'm the bad guy, coach. Coach, and I mean, maybe they didn't do the right quota of booze because the pre-boos because the champagne ran out real quick.

My best man, I was like, Billy, why are you not drinking? He's like, I had one glass and the champagne's cashed. I'm like, what the hell? We're going to sit around here now and nobody's drinking for three hours? It was gone pretty quick, but we could add grape and change. cheese. That was, you know, that was good. I didn't know about the finger foods with the old COVID going around. That's all good. No, it was good. You had a sandwich tray. That was awesome. That was, that was perfect.

But really, then there really wasn't enough. If you wanted to sit. Hey, Ray, I got a list of a couple things that didn't go as playing. Ray, if I would do the wedding over again, this is what I would do. You nailed it about sitting down in your suit, even though there, I don't know if we all could have sat down, but you were scared to sit down because you don't want to mess. You don't want to be the person that messes up the suit and is all wrinkled. Well, and also, it's like it was a weird, it was a fine mix, but a weird mix

because I got grandma right there, so I can't necessarily have Guy talk like, hey, how many chicks have you bagged? Because grandma's sitting five feet from me. With your mom. And grandma, how old's grandma? She probably couldn't hurt us, but. True. But it was so it's like, the conversation had to be a little bit different, you know, because you had family

members walking around. And then you can't be like, oh, my, how's my, I can't talk about, because Bay's dad's there. So I'm like, I'd be very respect. His mom was there. Coach, it was a very respectful three hours that I had to be.

So give your overall thoughts, right? I mean, the wedding, was it everything you imagine or did you not even imagine? Is it everything you dreamt of when you were a little boy? Coach, I don't think guys are like women. I didn't,

guys don't really dream of this stuff. But I will say, shameless plugs to her dad, Gary, her mom, Teresa, and the one and only, Garth Brooks and Tricia Yearwood for

everything they did. They gave us a venue. They gave us a chapel. They gave us transportation. They straight up hooked it up for the wedding. Props to them. I know they don't listen though. Coach, I'm going to be real with you. Not a lot of people can say that Garth and Trisha were at their wedding. That's awesome. I know. They were there witnessing

your marriage. Coach, and I had a moment, just a small, small moment with the man. I looked over and I bowed, thank you, and he gave me the old wink. Oh! No, no. Did he go left eye, or right eye? It was left, coach. The old left eye. The old left eye. Yeah, coach, I mean, it's just a moment that

you'll remember the rest of your life. Me and him didn't even, later I went and shook his hand, said thank you, and he said, love you, man, you're amazing. But the wing... He said that to you, or you said that to him? I said... Love you, man. No, no, no. I said, thank you very much, G. And he goes, love you, man, y'all are amazing.

He said, love you, you're amazing. I think he said, love you, man. I'm like, oh, my God, you love you? And then he said, you're amazing. But I think it was just a fist-pump. me this before I got married. But then Trisha, I went in for the hug. Even though it's COVID, I'm just like, I don't know. I think this is the time you do have to do the hug. And I guess she'll pull

off if she doesn't want to hug. She was down to hug. So then we hugged it, but I didn't know if I needed to ask Garth's permission to hug her. She was DTH. She was down to hug. Yeah. I mean, my wife, like, after the wedding and whatever, I was like, is that crazy? Did you see Garth and Trisha? She's like, where? I never saw

them. Oh my gosh. There's only 10 people in here, and you didn't see Garth and Trisha. They're in the back. They were in the back. They were. My wife was like, oh, I think I saw them. But they had mass on. So I wasn't sure if that was them.

But I'm pretty sure it was them. I was like, yes, it was them. Good thing about us, though. We were facing the church. You know, so I was facing them, but I couldn't look at them. I could try to make movements to see if I can make eye contact, but they weren't looking at me. They were looking at the bride and the groom at the front of the altar.

I would try to like either look at them or whatever. It's like, I can't. I can't because they're going to bust me. It's embarrassing. Don't do it. Dude, for like 40 minutes or however long the wedding was, 20 minutes. G's like, okay, who's this Joker? I'm just watching this random guy for 20 minutes.

Like, since when do you get G's attention for 20 minutes? Exactly. He's got to stare at some jackoff, staying at it up there. Funny you mentioned. Who even is this, dude? Funny you mentioned Joker, Coach. That was one of the observations I had. You were so relaxed, you and your bride.

Yes, your bride, especially. You guys were cracking jokes left and right during the ceremony. Coach, I've never seen that before in my life. I was very happy, and I knew it's a very serious thing to get married, want to make it just like, you're supposed to smile and do that stuff, and that's what we tried to do. I mean, standing up there, we wanted our person, I guess, in the moment, we just wanted our

personalities to show. I'm not just going to stand up there like a brick house or something. Like a stick in the mud. Right. No, it was great. You guys were laughing. It was fun. It was enjoyable. It was relaxed. The old couple things with the preacher. Love the man. I know he doesn't listen to his podcast so I can say this. I did have him, I put something in his speech where I wanted him to bring up Laura's cancer battle and he never brought it up. So I'm like, what the hell? And excuse me, I shouldn't have said that to the pastor.

Excuse my language. Anyways, and then the pastor, he went rogue and he tells some story about a rag doll. I'm like, buddy, we did not need the 22nd story or we did not need the two-minute story about a rag doll and a thing of money and it didn't even make sense the whole thing. I still don't even understand that.

I mean, I don't either, but coach, he did ask you if it's okay, if he told the story and you both said yes. I was like, I don't know. That wasn't on the script. Yeah, Ray thought the story was going to be about the cancer and the battle. But then this guy goes into some stack of money and rag dolls. And they started quoting some song, Coach, do you even know the song that he was quoting? Coach, he goes, you guys are two eagles on a mountain.

You are one eagle. I'm like, what? Were eagles not? So then he went from ragdolls to eagles. It was almost like he reincarnated us into animals. And it totally confused me. And he goes, will you take her wing? And I'm like, what?

Her tail. Her talent? And he said, watch out for her talons. Yeah. The Eagle thing, no idea where that came from. And the Ragdoll story, the whole weekend was trying to figure out what the hell it meant. Still don't know. So do you think that he knew that Bobby was in the audience and Garth and he was trying to shine?

Maybe they would think, oh, he needs a podcast because he's kind of funny. Dude, I think he just has maybe these little stories that he includes in his marriage stuff. And that's one of the ones he goes to. But the story was not that great. Did you hear me when he called you guys Eagles? I went, kaka. Did you see once we were married? He goes, yeah.

I'm like, okay, Pastor. He did. Yes, he did do that. And I was like, Pastor, quit trying to be cool. Yeah. He pulls a white claw out of his jacket and drinks it. No, he's shotgun. A butt light seltzer.

Okay. It is weird, though. The whole thing of how we're standing up there with, like, I didn't even know the guy that well. And I'm like just sitting there talking to him for 20 minutes, doing the most important promise you're ever going to make with a dude. It's like, tell me a story about a rag doll. Yeah. And I was impressed. I was impressed by your dad because your dad's very quiet.

So my dad's 6-6, huge, a massive man. But then he's like very quiet. Very quiet. And shy as well. And then when he tells me he's going to read, I was like, excuse me? He goes, yeah, Ray asked me to read. And I was like, really? And I found out you're the one that picked out the scripture. Yeah, coach. Yeah. And then I wanted it to be something that he was comfortable doing. And he said he was totally down to do a script. but he did like he was very quiet and I was like pops good job I mean he was also a little bit emotional he really was so pops gets up there and I mean at that moment I didn't cry but I'm just like pops why are you getting all emotional on me right now like we're all trying to keep it together

here all you're doing is reading a scripture come on are you are you yourself together are you the first or the last to get married you of your siblings the first the last all of them okay I mean brother got shotgun marriage like three months ago four hours yeah that's right this was the first wedding wedding for my parents but brother actually did beat me to the punch. Let me tell you, I talked to your sister because I needed to get details about you and your brother, how your opposites. This will be good for the podcast, Maria. So, are you playing the clip, Ray.

I really liked your sister. She was really nice. Whoa, whoa, that's his sister, dude. What was Ray like when he was two? What about when he was three? Was he like this at four years old? We actually did learn something. No, what did tell me?

She was just telling me, I was like, so they really don't talk? She goes, no, they've never really been like twins usually. think of twins. She goes, they're usually kind of friendly to each other. And like, she goes, they just never were really that close. And she said that you, when you were young, you used to play like you were a radio show and you would hit record

on something. You'd be like, and my special guest, my brother. And he'd be like, Ray, I'm not going to play. I'm not playing Ray. Right. And so you would have to bring your sister in to be on your little radio show. She was always my only guest on the show. Nobody else would go.

Come on. It was pretty funny that She was like, from a young age, he just didn't want to participate in raise antics. Yeah, something else, too. She mentioned that you've been turning your clothes inside out since middle school, even. Wow. I mean, I guess so, yeah. Like, why? Why again?

I don't know. What's something you do that you can't explain? How I breathe when I'm sleeping. There you go. It's just like that. When I put a shirt on inside out, it's breathing to me. I don't think twice about it. I can't.

I just don't know. You didn't like that. the logos on the outside, why would you start going to school? Well, your mom also said that, or maybe your sister, that you would flip your jeans, like, in the air, 50 times. 50 times before you put them on. Just to make sure they're all good and clean. Your boys don't do that?

Maybe one, but not 50. And of course, the story we would share with them, coaches, I knew, me and the lunchbox would always start with, like, we found out that Ray was a nervous wreck. Now. When this one time, we. went out to lunch and he only had 20 minutes worth of coins for the parking meter. Who'd you tell this to? Your sister.

Oh, my God. And what she said. That's what she told us about the jeans. She goes, that sounds like Ray. I don't know where he gets it. With the parking meter thing, what did she say?

What did she say? That's definitely right. She goes, but I don't understand. She's like, I don't think my parents are like that. Eddie's story is, I park in a parking spot when it says 30 minutes.

I want to be back in 30 minutes. Well, we ate lunch and it happened to be about to be 30 minutes. about to be 31 minutes. Well, I don't want a ticket. So I'm going to go to my vehicle at the end of 30 minutes. Call me weird, but I'm not going to get towed. No, I'm going to call you absolutely weird. It sounds normal.

It sounds completely normal. And here's lunches' explanation. No, lunches' explanation is, Ray, we're right next to the car. They're going to tow other people before you. No, no, Ray, they don't just tow you. They'll give you a $10 ticket. Yes. And anyway, we were literally 26 feet from the car.

So you would see someone walking. All right. And you could run and jump in your car. And there was 12 cars parked along the road. You were right in the middle. A tow truck is not coming to get you out of the middle of the car. You've explained it before. No, sir.

That's exactly how he told your sister, too. I was like, this dude is whack. You went and sat in the car while Eddie and I finished our lunch. Well, and if I'm being real, I didn't even enjoy that lunch because all I was thinking about was my car. You didn't, coach. I'm done. I'm done. I got to go.

Whoa, where are you going, coach? 25 feet away. He's sitting in the car. didn't enjoy his wedding. He's like, dude, we got to check out of the hotel by 11 tomorrow morning. We got to check out by 11 tomorrow morning. We can't. We can't have fun at our wedding. Yeah, right. Dude, I had work. No 11 a.m. check-ins out. Are you kidding me? I mean, and then yesterday. I'm thinking, okay, Ray and Bay will be hanging out. They'll be enjoying it. And there they are with Billy singing karaoke in the hotel room, drunk as a skunk. Last when? Yesterday. I got some insta if we can pull it up. Yeah. Let me see.

I mean, I thought, okay, Ray will take it easy now. He's married. You know, they're going to enjoy the day. themselves. They've had a long weekend with entertaining people. Nope. Billy in bed with them, singing karaoke. Billy's in bed with you guys? Pretty much. Billy's in town. I mean, obviously we're going to go hard. Whoa, whoa. That's Billy on a scooter. Probably not good audio.

Is that a hotel room? This is downtown. Oh, that was a construction on Broadway. Sorry about that. This is Allie singing. She was awesome. Then the rest of us did it and probably ruined it. Here's Billy's fiancé. Hey, this is after your wedding? And this is now at the hotel room.

Billy sauce. This is last night. This is yesterday afternoon. Everybody's singing karaoke in the hotel room. Oh. Oh. Billy. Yeah, there's Billy all sauce.

That was it, though. That was great. I hope that was entertaining to hear. I mean, that's incredible. So I'm glad. Hey. Congratulations. And then there's a picture on my Instagram.

We met these two chicks. I mean, I wasn't even married a day, and me and Billy already got two chicks hitting on us. It's on my Instagram, Sisson Ray Mundo in the Instagram stories. There's these two chicks trying to hit on us. Way to start your wedding. Coach, I had to tell them.

I'm a married man. And they're like, well, you can still talk to women. I'm like, oh, yeah, you're right. My bad. They couldn't see all the diamonds on your ring. They didn't see the bling, bling. Come on. Oh, flashy much, huh?

I may prep this for the big show. But boys, I've had to ring a day. I mean, it's already changing how people talk to me. Like, chicks talk to me strictly because I have a ring on. Oh, yeah. I mean, it's already started to happen. I didn't want to meet those girls. I didn't even start the conversation.

They did. All I have is my ring sticking out here, but they're coming up to me, guys. That's why, Coach, anytime you leave the house, just take it off. That's a little preview, though. You might hear more of that story on The Big Show. Just so you know, guys, that I just found, this. Someone email us. Uh-oh.

He said, hey, LB, quick suggestion. I know a majority of your listeners listen to the big show, but a few of us that don't, if you guys bring up something from the big show, could you give us a little quick recap because we have no idea what you're talking about and we're completely lost. All right. Like what? I don't know.

Andrew Juergen said that and I was like, I emailed him back. I said, first of all, thanks for the suggestion. Second of all, how in the world did you find our podcast if you don't listen to the big show? Oh, guys, I'm a little hung. I'm trying not to say that 10 times.

Yeah, you are a little hung. She said that for seven years. Thank you. That's why she married you, Coach. Come on. Come on. Boys, I woke up this morning. I thought I was on a different planet,

and I said, I'm officially hung. I did, coach, I did talk to someone else there at the reception, too. And another couple. I'm not going to mention any names, but I'm talking to the couple. Coach, there was less than 30 people there, so it's pretty easy to guess. Well, you may not. And I go, how did you guys meet? And they're like, oh, we've known each other since we were a lot, you know, we were young or whatever, but it was just something different, you know, like we were friends for a long time and then we decided to get together.

And it's like, well, what was it about him that you liked? Good boom, boom, she said. What? And I'm like, what? And the dude was so embarrassed. He's like, come on. There's nothing else that, like, you liked about me? She's like, nope, just good boom, boom.

What do you mean boom boom? Boom. I'm guessing that you're talking about. No, no, no. No, coach, don't. Don't. I don't care. No, don't.

Don't even go. That's funny, dude. I know. And he was safe, like, turned red. He's like, come on. He's serious. He's like, yeah, that's pretty much it. Coach, people are just being honest on the dance floor?

Coach, after, I mean, you had unlimited drinks, coach. Coach, her dad hooked it up. We had white claw. We had Bud Light Seltzers, Niccolo Baltra. I'll tell you what, coach. I like drinking a good red wine to start the night. Whatever you guys had. it was bueno.

You know what? That was a, it was left over from, like, it was a garth tritia thing. So it was like very expensive wine. I could tell it. It was. I had my first Bud Light Seltzer and Ray, you hyped those up and I got to say they're worse than white cloths. Yeah, Coach, they are worse than white cloths.

All right. But if you want to drink it, go ahead. I think maybe it's because they're an easier drink. You can put down eight and not have a rager the next day a hangover. But they've you up. They do. They're strong alcoholic wise. I'm just saying they're not the way, because you hyped White Claw, so I was excited about that.

And I was like, ah, these aren't that good. And then you said, oh, I'm on the Bud Light Seltzers. They're so much better. So show up at the reception. We grab a lemon lime, but light and seltzer. And I was like, huh. We both look at each other. We're like, not so good.

Okay, guys, then drink whiskey, drink scotch. I know, I got a beer. No, no, we drank out to that. But I was just saying, it was on. And then props of the dude who's handing out fireballs. Did you get one? She's. No, he didn't hook me up.

Dude, I went in the bathroom. Did you not like me or what? I don't know. It was sneaking them to people. I went in the bathroom and there's three mini bottles of a fireball. And I'm like, who the hell is getting smashed in my wedding? This is epic. And so I find the dude.

And he goes, yeah, I went to the liquor store. And they wouldn't let me buy individuals. They said, you've got to buy two sleeves. He's like, so I did. So, dude, he was giving him out all night. Yeah. He was walking around with a black trash bag handing out with shot. It was almost like the routine was like, hey, man, how you doing?

I'm so-and-so. Good to meet you. Did you get a fireball? and then he'd give you a fireball. Coach, he was Tankville. We did a hotel after party after that party. Dude, he was, we went, we ended up getting on a private rooftop. You did?

It doesn't even open until 2021. I saw you tweet that. Dude, the, this place we were staying at, and basically nobody was there because tourists still aren't coming to Nashville because of the pandemic that we've all experienced. Yeah. But they didn't need, the bar, I believe, closed. Now the bar is closed at 10, which coach sucks. but you don't want people in bars.

It's bad for COVID. But anyways, the bar's closed. So everything was closed. And Billy and Jonathan just hooked it up and they got us on a private rooftop that doesn't even open until next year. Legit. And the guy goes, the person that allowed us to do it worked there. And he goes, well, yeah, I'll let you go onto this private rooftop. He's like, but the only thing I ask, can I have one of your beers?

And he's like, clean up afterwards. That's all you got to do. And we're like, okay, those are the only two stipulations. Got it. Here's a beer. And you're drinking on the job? Love it. Did Bay go out there in her wedding dress or did she change first?

Uh, she was in wedding dress reception. I'm trying to. Yeah, she changed. She definitely, because everybody then changed and I'm walking around in a monkey suit. Oh, you kept the suit? Yeah, it looked like I just got married to myself. I just want, because I didn't know if, like, at the end of the night, you had that.

You married yourself. If you had the experience of taking her out of the wedding dress and, you know. Okay. If you could detail this for us, Ray. No, that's, I just wonder. Did you Chris, Ray or? Curves. Did you unzip the back of her dress?

Ray, was it truly amazing? Can you explain it? Possible. Thank you. Wow. What was that? Coach, in times of COVID, get him a mask. All right.

If you're going to be doing that crap, I'm about to eat an apple. Hey, guys. You say bless me at least? No. Bless you, coach. Thank you. What was that? All the listeners blessed you.

Hey, we go to the mailbag. We are the sore losers at gmail.com. First off, congrats. Ray Mundo. Okay, how many of these are they going to be? Next. He's going to read all of them. Another one, Ray, it says, congrats, Sizzin and Bay.

Oh, I got a new one here. Congratulations to Sison and Bay. Wedding cake emoji. Congrats, Ray Mundo, first off. Ray's hung. Dude, I'm straight up hung. Ray said, I'll pay you to talk for me today. I don't know what else I can tell you guys.

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