The Bobby Bones Show - FEELING THINGS: Signs Your Friendship Feels Like Home & Will Amy’s Oura Ring Keep Her Single?

Episode Date: May 3, 2026

Kat is feeling scattered and Amy is feeling thankful. While, can’t remember why exactly she feels that way, she does know that she hates the saying: “Wet my whistle.” The mention of ...“whistle” makes the conversation take an interesting turn. Amy is also fully convinced her Oura Ring is going to keep her single forever because her sleep score now matters more than going out. Kat recommends a new game called Play 9 that might be their new favorite thing. A comment made about Amy talking with her hands a lot on an IG live sparks a chat about policing our own thoughts. Plus a list of signs that a friendship feels like home and whether Amy and Kat's friendship checks all the boxes. And new research from Oxford shows most women have about five close friends and what happens to that number when a new relationship comes along. Get some Feeling Things merch by clicking HERE! (FeelingThingsPodcast.com) Sign up for the Feeling Things newsletter HERE! Watch us on Youtube HERE! Call and leave a voicemail: 877-207-2077 Email: heythere@feelingthingspodcast.com HOSTS: Amy Brown // RadioAmy.com // @RadioAmy Kat Van Buren // threecordstherapy.com // @KatVanburenSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 This is an IHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human. Joy is essential and it's also elusive. But now, there's a new and exciting way to start your journey toward a more joyful existence. Joy 101. It's a new podcast hosted by me, Hoda Kotby. If you're craving inspiration to maximize your joy, tune into these candid, uplifting, and moving on-air chats.
Starting point is 00:00:24 Open your free IHeart Radio app. Search Joy 101 and listen now. Joy 101 with Hoda Kotopje is presented by CVS. There was no anything inside those eyes. They turned black. It scared the hell out of me. Evil, wake up. I'm the one that saw the murder take place by Krivac and DePippo.
Starting point is 00:00:53 Anthony DePippo showed no signs of remorse, appearing unfazed after being sentenced to the maximum. I said, I'm not guilty. I'll take it to the grave. Listen to the devil's quarry in the Bone Valley feed on the IHart Radio app. Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. All right, listen up. The Jonas Brothers here.
Starting point is 00:01:20 Our podcast is called Hey Jonas. We've here since everyone has a podcast, we want it to as well. And we've had some incredible guests so far. And now our good friend, Nile Horn, is joining the show. How's it going, boys? Hey, Niall. It was the same thing with Slow Hands. Slow Hands is not about anything else, really, is it?
Starting point is 00:01:33 You know, or taste so good can't be about food. You do the same, Nick, with some of the stuff that you've done. You too, Joe. Drop what you're doing and listen to Hey Jonas on the Iheart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your podcasts. Everyone sees me as a football player. But before anything else, I'm human. Every single day, I'm still learning how to live with problems, mistakes, relationships, emotions ever since I was born. This isn't a normal podcast.
Starting point is 00:02:01 Everything here is spontaneous, real and genuine, just honest conversations about what it means to be alive. I'm Javier El Chicharito Hernandez and listen to Learning to Be Human on IHard Radio, Apple Podcasts, or whatever you get your podcast. your feeling first because I'm so scattered. I don't remember why that was my feeling. Oh, you just wrote it down? I wrote it down earlier this morning. That makes sense. No idea. If you're scattered, you lost the feeling. Lost scattered. Okay, well, I'll talk and you think. Okay. But what I'm thankful for, it has to do directly with you. So I want you to hear my gratitude. Okay. So I texted you because I was looking for a book. I started a book called The names and I cannot get into it. However, this is a recommendation from Kelsey, who's Mike D's
Starting point is 00:03:30 wife. Mike D is on the Bobby Bone Show and his wife is an avid reader and she has been batting a thousand when it comes to book recommendations. Like she does not miss. She let me borrow names. Like she sent it with Mike and Mike just showed up. I didn't even ask her. He's just like, here's another book. And I was like, oh my gosh, this is going to be good. And I can't get into it. Let me tell you the premise. Okay. So the storyline follows the life of this mom and child, a whole family. There's a husband, a sister. And there's three different name options for this kid. And there's every, like there's every chapter, I don't know, bulk of the book. I don't know, this style of writing. I don't know how to. Like part? Every part. Yes, part. Like part one. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Bulk. I didn't know how to, yes.
Starting point is 00:04:25 It's tough part. Yeah. Maybe I'm scattered. You know, each bulk, each section, it would be like circling three different names. So it would be like a chapter in that part would be if we named the baby this. This is what would have happened in life. Right. The whole scenario.
Starting point is 00:04:45 I don't need to hear this right now. I know. You're with child and you're probably thinking of baby names. And then the second chapter in the first. bulk would be okay and this is the trajectory of our life since we named the baby this and then there's a third name option but it takes you through all three names like from birth and then the next part is like age eight and the next part is age so it goes all the way do you know do you remember the names i only made it to part two yeah bear jillian and gordon or something like that is it a girl or a boy it's a boy
Starting point is 00:05:21 Is it Gillian? No. Jillian with a J. Julian. Julian. Julian. Julian is a girl, right? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:30 Julian. Julian. Julian. Okay. Yeah. So that was just from the dome. Okay. I only read the first part and a little bit of the second part.
Starting point is 00:05:39 And then I... What didn't you? Then I texted you and I said, I need a book. But what, it just wasn't interesting to you? I just couldn't get into it. Okay. It sounds like a crazy book. It is interesting.
Starting point is 00:05:50 I just, maybe I wasn't. in the right headspace for it, I know with every bone in my body, it's got to be a good book because Kelsey recommended it. I'm telling you, the girl does not go wrong. So I just think I needed to set that one aside and devour the book you sent, which you were like, hey, you should read the housemaids books. Like, and I thought it was a typo, like, oh, because I thought there was just one book. Well, then I look it up and it is a three book in bulk. Just kidding. I know what it's called a series. A trilogy. And the movie that came out a few months ago, that's book number one. So I assume they're going to make movies on book two and three. Do you know? I don't know. I'd hope so.
Starting point is 00:06:43 The movie was very good. And I also feel like it's very hard to make movies. that are like almost identical to the book, they only change from what I remember one little thing. And it was because the movie has to be shorter, it wouldn't have worked if they didn't change it. Okay. I'm curious to watch the movie. I mean,
Starting point is 00:07:04 I'm already done with the book because I ordered it. I've saved a lot of money thanks to Kelsey because she keeps giving me books to read, which is awesome. And then I have some credits with Audible. And so I just justify like, okay, I'm going to order the paperback for $9.99. and then I'm also going to order the audible for 99.
Starting point is 00:07:22 And that helps with my, especially with my dyslexia and my goal of reading this year. Like it's just a really, the immersion reading is so great for me. Whether I listen while I'm reading or I listen while I'm walking or doing laundry and housework, which that's what happened me this weekend. I could not stop listening. And then I was bummed. I even ordered the book to read because I, the physical part of the book that I read was like, I don't know, a few chapters because I listened to the entire thing.
Starting point is 00:07:48 And that's how I got through it so quick. But I didn't have a lot of downtime. Like Stevenson had a track meet. I wish I'd have taken the book with me to the track meet. But I didn't. But that's okay because I had it on Audible and I listened. But I could have gone into like the bleacher area and sat down and read because that's, I want to exercise my brain with the reading.
Starting point is 00:08:08 And I know that listening I still can use my imagination. I'm still exercising my brain in a different way. But I really want my eyes on the page. so I'm trying to have a healthy balance. But with what's the housemaid book number one? So good. So good. It's good because it's an interesting story and it's like keeps you on your toes and you just
Starting point is 00:08:31 want to read the next chapter. But it's an easy read. And that's what I really liked about it is that like you can read it really, like you just fly through it, which is different. And I had no idea. Well, even though the movie came out. Oh, I was shocked too. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:45 I was just like there were twists and turns where I was. was like, oh, oh, okay, oh. So I am very excited to see where the second book goes, House Made Secret. I think so. So I'm starting that. But now I get to watch the movie. So thank you. I'm thankful for your recommendation. And I am thankful for Kelsey's recommendations. I just need to circle back on the names, which is the name of the book. Yeah. The book, the names at a later date. I was going to say the book you recommended to me was not so much of an easy read. Theo O'Goldton? I'm not out on this book.
Starting point is 00:09:24 I think I just needed a different. I took it to the beach. And at the beach, I feel like you need like just an easy, peasy where like a million things could be going on and you could just be like reading this book. You needed an Emily Henry. Yes. Like a romance. A real beach read. Wrong com.
Starting point is 00:09:39 But this book, I'm, I think I'm 100 pages in now. When I texted you last time, I just think I was three pages in. Yes. You're like, I'm at the beach. I've read three pages. It takes a second to get into it, which is, there's other books that I like that. Like, Winter Garden, it takes a second to get into that one too. And I love that book. So I didn't give up on it. It just, this is just word to the wise. Although, I did see a more elderly woman on the beach reading Thea Golden. So other people are reading it on the beach. A lot of people are reading it. It's a very popular book. And also, when I posted that picture of it, I wasn't saying
Starting point is 00:10:19 like it's an elderly book, but I don't know why I need to describe her age. Well, the main character is elderly. Yes, yes. But it was kind of cute because she was sitting over there on her chair, reading Theo of Golden. I was like sitting there holding the book pretending I was reading it too. You're like, oh, we're the same. I love this Theo guy. Anyway. You pass her later. You're like, Theo, am I right? Also, it took me a second. To understand, I don't know if it was supposed to be like this where I was just distracted. I didn't understand what Golden was for like a couple pages. I think that's what threw me off?
Starting point is 00:10:52 It's I was like, what is Golden and why can't we just figure that out? But I didn't even, so I didn't know anything about what the book was about before I opened it. Anyway, I did also get, when I posted that picture of the book, so many people messaged me and said, this is one of my favorite books. So I just want you guys to know, I'm keeping with it. you're not going to give up. It just wasn't as easy-peasy, and maybe I've become a lazy reader. Yeah, it's, he has a sophistication about him.
Starting point is 00:11:23 Yeah. The writer does too. I texted you and I was like, maybe I'm not smart. And that's the writer's debut novel. No way. Yeah, I'm pretty sure. Lucky Duck. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:33 He really struck gold with that. Well, he's talented. Yeah, talented. Well, a lot of writers are talented and they don't. That's true. And their debut does not catch fire like that one. How, unless you like, how do you, especially in this age of everybody's writing a book and a lot of celebrities write books now and those books go straight to the New York Times bestsellers list, how do you become just a bestselling author who comes from nothing? You get an literary agent.
Starting point is 00:12:03 Imagine? And then they work it and then you're with a publisher. And they promote it. Yeah. And then some people just buy their own books and it hits the list. They're like, oh. Well, that's what I've heard. I don't know that.
Starting point is 00:12:15 I don't know for sure. I haven't heard that directly from somebody, but you hear of like, oh, this person, maybe in one of my books, maybe in one of my Emily Henry books, where there's authors, they talk about. Doing that? That's like, I mean, I guess if you have the money, it's kind of smart, but that's kind of cheating the system. Exactly. Huh. So why are you feeling scattered?
Starting point is 00:12:37 Did you think of it? No, I literally have no idea. Maybe because I just got. Well, that track. I love that you're feeling matches right now. Yeah. Where you are right now. It's still scattered.
Starting point is 00:12:50 I still am scattered. Yeah. Maybe because I just got home last night and I haven't like collected my bearings, you know. Well, before we started recording, because you just said, collected my bearings. You said, do you know what saying I really can't stand? Well, I almost said it. I just decided in this five minutes ago that I hated the stain because I almost said it. And I was like, ooh, don't say that.
Starting point is 00:13:10 Five months, Toronto. It is an opportunity for you to create your own space, to celebrate your existence. Iheart Radio is proud to be an official sponsor of Pride Toronto Festival, and we won't stop. Celebrate Pride. Turn up the love and listen to IHeart Pride Canada, your 24-7 radio stream and the only playlist you need for your Toronto Pride celebrations. Pride is so great because it gives a whole bunch of people this visibility that they've never had before. We have a ton to celebrate Toronto. Happy Pride. IHeart Radio. It felt like it was going on forever.
Starting point is 00:13:54 I didn't think I was going to live. I was terrified. There was no anything inside those eyes. They turned black. It scared the hell out of me. That was your first murder case? Yes, sir. Fear to say this was the biggest case of your career?
Starting point is 00:14:13 Yes, sir. Rape and murder for a child. She's as bad as it gets. I would think so. People wake up. I'm the one that saw the murder take place by a prevent. Anthony DePippo showed no signs of remorse, appearing unfazed after being sentenced to the maximum.
Starting point is 00:14:32 I said, I'm not guilty. I'll take it to the grief. Listen to the devil's quarry on the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And to hear the Devil's Quarry ad free with exclusive content, subscribe to Love for Good Plus on Apple Podcasts. Hey, I'm Hoda Kotby, host of the podcast, Joy 101 with Hoda Kotit. Together, we're going to have meaningful conversations with the world's most fascinating people. Like when actress Olivia Munn shared how she overcame fierce health challenges. I've gone through breast cancer and then helped my mother through breast cancer, and that was more difficult.
Starting point is 00:15:20 There's a lot of people who understand postpartner depression. I was not prepared for postpartum anxiety. Listen to Joy 101 with Hoda Kotby on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Last night, a blown call changed a game. This morning, the internet lost. its mind. Highlights are trending, opinions are flying, and nobody's telling you exactly what happened. That's where Sports Slice comes in. I'm Timbo. Every episode, we're cutting through the noise, breaking down the plays, the controversies, and the stories behind the headlines. We go straight
Starting point is 00:15:49 to the source, the athletes themselves, their locker room stories, their reactions, the stuff nobody gets to hear. The laughs, the drama, the triumphs, the moments that never make the highlight real. From viral moments to historic games, from buzzer beaters to controversial calls, we break it down, you context and ask the questions everybody wants answered. Sports Slice brings you closer to the action with stories told by the people who live them. Listen to Sports Slice on the Iheart Radio
Starting point is 00:16:15 app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. And for more, follow Timbo Sliced Life 12 and the TikTok podcast network on TikTok. I just decided in this five minutes ago that I hated the stain because I almost said it. And I was like, ooh, don't say that. Well, I was thirsty and I was like, I got it.
Starting point is 00:16:34 I need to wet my whistle. I need to wet my whistle. just say. Oh, I did not say that. As I said that in my brain, you know, sometimes I think before I speak, most of the time I don't. And I was like, ooh, don't say that. I don't like it. Wet my whistle. Yeah. That sounds like, ooh. Anyway, if that, if you love that saying, keep saying it. It's just not for me. I don't know. Who says that? Like maybe my grandma. I'm going to older people. Yeah. It's a lady on the beach. I got to wet my whistle because also is it sounding dirty to me?
Starting point is 00:17:10 That's what it was sounding to me. Yeah. Maybe it's because there's that song that's like, isn't there a song that's like, Whistle, baby, whistle baby, let me, like a, what? What? Whistle. But isn't that one, that is about. I don't know what that is.
Starting point is 00:17:28 Have you watched beef on Netflix? The first season. I haven't watched one yet. Okay. Well, season two is out. and they show the whistle. Well, a lot of, wait, they show. Full frontal. They do that,
Starting point is 00:17:39 they did that in righteous gemstones a lot in the last season. Yeah. I'm just, I'm like, when did we start showing men's whistles? What? What channel is that on? Netflix.
Starting point is 00:17:51 That's nuts. Right, because kids could just easily. See the whistle. See the whistle. Like, it's no problem. You used to have to pay for like, Skidimax. Skidimax.
Starting point is 00:18:02 Well, it was Cinemax, but it was. We called it Skinna Max. Because of... Because you could see skin. I thought that was more of like an HBO thing. No, it's on Netflix. Yeah, because Game of Thrones,
Starting point is 00:18:17 Bobby said they show stuff there. The new game of not, it's like the prequel to Game of Thrones or something. Patrick was watching that. And like the first episodes or something, it's a big old whistle. I love how to know. We've nicknamed it a whistle.
Starting point is 00:18:34 I've never heard anybody call it a whistle, but hopefully people are tracking with what we're talking about. I think it makes sense. Yeah. Like whistle. Cryo cats like, I'm going to start using that every day. I've got my aura ring here and I don't know why a whistle made me just think of the story. But maybe it's because I don't know that I'll ever be with a whistle again. Because all I care about now is my sleep.
Starting point is 00:19:01 Oh, my gosh. I don't want to go out because I have to get a crown on my sleep score because you can get your readiness score, your sleep score, and your movement score. And sometimes I get optimal. Like last night I got optimal. Can you not have optimal sleep? No. No, lately I've been getting good, but I don't want to get bad. Well, what if you are with a partner that you feel very safe and connected with and you get really good sleep?
Starting point is 00:19:32 You're regulating each other. Well, that would be fine, but that would mean I wouldn't be, and I wouldn't be, my ring says, time to get ready for bed. And I'm like, oh, time to get ready for bed. And I go and I wash my face and I get ready for bed because I have to prepare my body for sleep so I can get good sleep. So I'm just saying I'm not going to, my ring is going to keep me single because now I care about sleep a lot. How do we hide your ring? No. No, I want good sleep. I mean, maybe I could meet somebody during the day. time. Yeah. I think this will become a problem when you're wanting to like, you know, stay up a little later and like hang out. You know when you have like the new relationship feeling and like you do you do this and you forego like all of your experience because it's exciting. And you're like, oh yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:19 That's when you're going to have to make a decision. But I think right now you have plenty of time outside of your getting ready for bedtime in your sleep time to meet somebody, I think. Okay. Well, we'll see. TBD. I just had this thought about how it's. just it feels so good. And sleep is so important, but so is having fun. But I'm like,
Starting point is 00:20:40 I can have fun during the day. Do you believe that? I don't know. I'm really enjoying the sleep. Are there other parts of that ring that you are liking? I'm tracking my cycle, which is great. How do you? I enter it in. I log it in. So it's just more of in the app. And my ring will get to know me, but I need to have it for longer to where it'll feel my temper. and know my cycle's coming, but here's the thing. You know, I've got my testosterone pellet in. I got my iron IV. I'm on my vitamin D. And my ovaries, so you know, each cycle, it goes right ovary, then left, and then right and then left. Like when you're having your period, it's this side and then the next month is the other side. At one point I knew that and you just reminded me. I forgot
Starting point is 00:21:27 that. Okay. Now I'm second guessing myself. In my mind, that's how my body works. I think that sounds right. I'm like 99% sure. So my, I don't know which one it is, but my right one I just had not that long ago. And then a week goes by and my left one goes into action. But then between my left one back to my right one will give me like more of a normal 28-day cycle. But when I go, I'm on the one where and I never noticed it fully that it was just a week apart, but because I entered, because of my ring,
Starting point is 00:22:03 now I'm tracking things and I entered it in. And I was looking at the calendar. I'm like, I'll be dang. That is one week in between, from the stop to the start. Does the ring say like, oh, something's up? No, because I have to enter. No, it just takes your information. It just knows.
Starting point is 00:22:17 But now I know. And when I go, I have a follow-up appointment at my gynecologist on May 7th for blood work to see where I am with all my levels. She's going to be proud of me for tracking. Because I always feel like I'm going to remember. I'm like, I don't need a track that's annoying. And then I'm like, shoot, was that a Tuesday? Or was it a Wednesday?
Starting point is 00:22:35 And was that even last week? And when was it? Has it been two weeks? And now I know. I have the proof. Thanks to the app, I'm entering it. And we'll see. And now Shannon's updating us on the ovaries.
Starting point is 00:22:48 And she said, well, it's not necessarily the case. While it's common belief that ovaries alternate every other month, the process is not a strict, perfect rotation. One ovary can release an egg for several months in a row, or the right ovary may ovulate more frequently than the left. The dominant ovary. Many people have one that is dominant. Okay. I wonder how do they choose. When it's doing one week in between, I think the other one is kicking in. Because I don't think the other one. The other one's like, wait's my turn. Yeah, the other one would be like, the other one might be saying that the other one. Dude, I just did it. Like a week ago, you're good. And then it's like, no, I'm ready.
Starting point is 00:23:26 And it goes. That's just annoying. I'm sorry. It's okay. To all of our men listening, I am sorry. I didn't even mean to talk about that. Well, you ask what I like more about my ring. Or if I like other things about my ring.
Starting point is 00:23:39 And it's really what I can enter into the app and the information I'm learning about myself. Yeah. I have something for the men. I have what? This is for the woman and the men. I just think everybody can benefit from this. I just have to throw this recommendation out because I have found a, you know,
Starting point is 00:23:54 new game that I'm obsessed with and you can play it with two people. Okay. And it's a golf game, but it's not really about golf. So if your partner or your friend or whoever loves golf and you love playing games, you can trick them into saying, hey, I have this golf game and then they'll play it with you. Okay. It's called Play 9 is a card game. I actually think this is a game you could play with normal cards. So I was picturing you were on a golf course, but we're not. No, no, so sorry, sorry. This is a card game. Okay. And you can play with two people and you can play it anywhere.
Starting point is 00:24:27 Like we brought it to the beach. We didn't play on the beach because of the wind. But like the airport and the house when it was raining and all that. It's so fun. I don't think I need to explain the rules of the game because that's boring. But look it up, especially if you want a game that you can play with just two people. Or you can play with six people. Okay.
Starting point is 00:24:45 Okay. I have a little bit of sports information. So the game is called. Play nine. So it's like nine holes. Okay. So that's the golf part. Yes, and the cards have like golf pictures on them.
Starting point is 00:24:56 But it's not, it has nothing to do with golf. Okay. You don't have to know anything about golf. Also, I have some sports knowledge. Do you watch any, you don't watch any golf. Did you watch full swing? Yeah, I did. Okay.
Starting point is 00:25:10 Do you remember Matt Fitzpatrick? Yes. Okay. Do you know that he has a brother that was on the European golf tour? So he's not on the PGA tour, the main tour. Okay, I don't, I did not know. Because his brother was on full swing too. So they just played in a tournament.
Starting point is 00:25:25 I think this is so, this tier, I teared up when I saw this. They just played it in a tournament. Matt Fitzpatrick is a professional golfer. His brother's like, I guess you would count him as like semi-pro. You can,
Starting point is 00:25:36 there's this tournament once a year that a professional golfer can pick anybody. They can pick you to play in this tournament with them. If you win the tournament, you now get to be on the PGA tour. Oh, wow. They won. Oh, that's fun. So Matt Fitzpatrick got his,
Starting point is 00:25:52 I mean, his brother obviously had to play well too. But by inviting him to play with him, he got his brother on the PGA tour for two years. That's awesome. I thought that's sweet. We were playing, play nine while we were watching that happen. Aw. Yeah. So little rec and little info for all of our male listeners.
Starting point is 00:26:09 Yes. It's good. Some ovary talk, some golf talk. Balance it out. I do have a question for you as a therapist, but also as my friend. Okay. Okay, because this is something that happened. No, it's not a trick.
Starting point is 00:26:24 But I'm sure you're going to be like, there's no truth to this at all whatsoever, but it's sort of ridiculous. Like, we were doing Instagram live on the Bobby Bone Show on the other day, and Shannon happened to be watching. Like, it pops up on Instagram, so she clicked on and she was watching. And I was telling a story and I was using my hands while I was talking. And she saw comments that came through, so she grabbed them.
Starting point is 00:26:43 Okay. Sue, Sue says who, I don't know. I don't, I don't have to read the handles, but that's the handle, wrote. What's with Amy's constant hand movements? I've heard it's a sign of eating disorders. And then KRR-7-29 replied, what? A lot of people talk with their hands. And then Sizzu-hoo or whatever said, not anyone I know.
Starting point is 00:27:07 What? I was like, why would someone just say that? Does talking with your hands have anything to do with eating disorders, being that you're a therapist that specializes in disordered eating and eating disorders? I can say very confidently, I have never in my 15 years of working in this field. I would also like to say you are explaining this while you're moving your hands. Have I heard there to be a correlation between hand talking and eating disorders? You know what? There could be a correlation because a lot of people talk with their hands, but there's no cause.
Starting point is 00:27:43 Like there's no cause in effect. They're not actually connected. No causation. But you could have an eating disorder and also talk with your hands, but you can talk with your hands. but you can talk with your hands and not have an eating disorder. I'm glad we cleared that up. But besides that. So that is like almost like so absurd.
Starting point is 00:27:58 It's like one of those things that's like, who cares? But at the same time, why would you say that? Exactly. I don't know. That's why Shannon thought it was funny. And she pulled the comment. And I was like, oh, ha, ha, I'm going to ask cat because she's a therapist that specializes in this. And I thought you might know.
Starting point is 00:28:14 Like, because what if you're like, oh, interesting. So crazy you're saying that. There was a study out of Harvard that said. Well, maybe I'm missing something. I don't think so, Kat. Like, I just think people. And when you're like, why would they type that? I saw this one girl do a reel.
Starting point is 00:28:26 It was in my for you, so I don't know who she is. I'd love to give her credit. I don't know. It was just, I was scrolling. But she was like, hey, okay, let's talk about this. Like, she's looking in the camera, talking to people. She's like, I'm talking to you. If you are going to type something, make sure you would say it to someone's face.
Starting point is 00:28:45 If you're not able to say it to their face, no type. typey. Like, no type, no say to face. If you can say to face, then you can type. But most of the time, you're not going to say to someone's face all the horrible things that people type. Like when people, I guess someone maybe had called out her crow's feet or something, she's like, so if you wouldn't walk up to some random person at the grocery store and be like, oh, your crow's feet, then like, why type that to a random woman on the internet? Right. Exactly. Beautiful. video and beautiful message. And I was going to say beautiful recreation of said video by you. She could give her credit. It was like at joy something. Shoot, I don't know. If you've seen it,
Starting point is 00:29:30 let us know. I don't follow this person. But what is interesting about this is, I'm assuming this person really has not heard this. Maybe they're just saying because I've had an eating disorder and I use my hands a lot, they're just being mean. That's where I'm getting. Okay. Because then why wouldn't you say like I give more information or something if you're going to put that on there also besides all of that what's the point that's with like a lot of these comments like you're saying like the crow's beat my question to a lot of that stuff is like what is the point of that like if somebody was concerned about you I'm feeling I'm protective of you I'm sorry this is not therapist cat this is friend cat which is good because up next I have signs of a safe friendship okay I'm feeling
Starting point is 00:30:15 safe right now. Okay, good. If I was concerned whether I knew you or not, I probably would not leave a comment on a public forum like that. I would either, if I didn't know you, and I was really concerned and feel like I needed to say something, I would message you, would DM you. And if I, as your friend was concerned, I would talk to you in person. But if I was really concerned about, oh, no, like, has she relapsed or something? I wouldn't put it there when that's just going to cause negative attention. Yeah, well, maybe they wanted the attention, like the rage bait thing people do. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:50 And we just gave it to them. I'm glad I didn't really enunciate what the actual handle was. I just said, scissors. Oh, we did give the rage bait. But I didn't say, no, I wasn't saying it right. Their handle isn't even. The other thing is with the like, when people are just making comments about people's appearance, like the crow's feet, that's also I, we all have thoughts.
Starting point is 00:31:09 And this is where I can like really, I can not empathize, but understand. somebody having a thought about what somebody looks like, right? That's what we do as humans. We look at people and we automatically make judgments. Most of those thoughts stay in my head because why would I say, it's almost like that acronym that Sissy Goff taught us, wait, why am I talking? Like, why am I saying this? What would this do? What would this bring? What's the point? So it's not bad to have a thought. You can't help your thoughts. Waste. Wait, what is that? Why am I saying this? Yes. Okay. Waste. We need to start using that because it's not bad to have a thought. We can't help our thoughts, but we are responsible with what we do with those thoughts and we need to, you know, what's it called when you're like policing? We need to police our own thoughts. And I think sometimes we just don't. Some people don't care. Some people don't care. And maybe they're, why am I saying this is that I want to hurt somebody or if it makes me feel good to say something mean about you or whatever. but I don't think I'm better than anybody in the sense that like I have negative thoughts about
Starting point is 00:32:19 people too. I just choose wisely what to do with them. And I'm sure people like, yeah, people probably have negative thoughts about me all the time. You can have them all you want. I just don't need to know them. Well, thank you for that. You just got me all feeling hot. Got you in your feelings. Pride month, Toronto. Pride is an opportunity for you to create your own space to sell it. Your Existence. IHeart Radio is proud to be an official sponsor of Pride Toronto Festival, and we won't stop. Celebrate Pride. Turn up the love and listen to IHeart Pride Canada.
Starting point is 00:33:02 Your 24-7 radio stream and the only playlist you need for your Toronto Pride celebrations. Pride is so great because it gives a whole bunch of people this visibility that they've never had before. We have a ton to celebrate Toronto. Happy Pride. Iheart Radio. In the moment, it felt like it was going on forever. I didn't think I was going to live. I was terrified. There was no
Starting point is 00:33:27 anything inside those eyes. They turned black. It scared the hell out of me. That was your first murder case? Yes, sir. Fair to say this was the biggest case of your career? Yes, sir. Rape a murder for a child.
Starting point is 00:33:43 Just as bad as it gets. I would think so. People wake up. I'm the one that saw the murder take place by Crevette and DePippo. Anthony DePippe. Hippo showed no signs of remorse, appearing unfazed after being sentenced to the maximum. I said, I'm not guilty. I'll take it to the grief.
Starting point is 00:34:08 Listen to the devil's quarry on the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And to hear the devil's quarry ad free with exclusive content, subscribe to Love for Good Plus on Apple Podcasts. Hey, I'm Hoda Kotby, host of the podcast, Joy 101 with Hoda Kotby. Together, we're going to have meaningful conversations with the world's most fascinating people. Like when actress Olivia Munn shared how she overcame fierce health challenges. I've gone through breast cancer and then helped my mother through breast cancer, and that was more difficult. There's a lot of people who understand postpartner depression.
Starting point is 00:34:49 I was not prepared for postpartum anxiety. Listen to Joy 101 with Hoda Kotby on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Last night, a blown call changed a game. This morning, the internet lost to... It's mine. Highlights are trending, opinions are flying, and nobody's telling you exactly what happened. That's where Sports Slice comes in. I'm Timbo.
Starting point is 00:35:10 Every episode, we're cutting through the noise. Breaking down the plays, the controversies, and the stories behind the headlines. We go straight to the source, the athlete themselves. Their locker room stories, their reactions, the stuff nobody gets to hear. The laughs, the drama, the triumphs, the moments that never make the highlight real. From viral moments to historic games, from buzzer beaters to controversial calls, we break it down, give you context and ask the questions everybody wants answered. SportsLice brings you closer to the action with stories told by the people who live them.
Starting point is 00:35:40 Listen to SportsSlice on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. And for more, follow Timbo Slic Life 12 and the TikTok podcast network on TikTok. Okay, cryocat just said that I guess one time on the Bobby Bone Show, I had a story about how honest people talk with their hands. So, yay. So that means that doesn't necessarily. mean you have an eating disorder, but it might mean that you're honest. I mean, maybe. I don't know where that study is either. I mean, I'm sure at that, when I was sharing that, I had a study that I was talking about. But some people talk with
Starting point is 00:36:19 their hands. Some people don't. Some people use filler words. Some people don't. I want to be someone that maybe uses their hands a little less because I think it's a comfort thing for me. And I want to use less filler words. That's interesting. The filler words I understand and same. I feel like when people talk with their hands, it adds. And it makes them appear more confident a lot of times. Okay. But sometimes I feel like mine are flailing about. Well, show me what you do.
Starting point is 00:36:46 Well, I mean, if I'm, like, I think if you do things like give enough, like, it's good to have a visual. Like, if I'm going to say, I'm going to share with you 10 signs that you are in a safe friendship, right? Like, seeing the 10 is good, at least. I think research shows that four. I'm going to give you four. Like we like seeing that visual with what we're talking about. But sometimes I'm just like all about and like hitting things. One time I was talking with my hands so much, I ripped my earring out and it ripped all the way through.
Starting point is 00:37:18 And that's when I had to have my ear sewn back together. Did you rip that off on the show? Yeah, because my, no, I was at my son's birthday party and I was talking to somebody. And I was talking with my hands and my finger got caught in the ear. and my earring hole was already hanging on by thread, obviously. But it ripped all the way through. And my earring landed on the sidewalk, but it was still intact. And I'm like, well, how did that happen?
Starting point is 00:37:44 And then I put my hand in my ear and it was bleeding. And I was like, my ear ripped. And then I had to have a plastic surgeon, like sew it back together. And just that's because I was talking with my hands too much. So, you know, flailing about. But I do want to get to the signs your friendship feels like home. I saw this at Medium.com and it feels like home is aka safe. Okay.
Starting point is 00:38:08 Okay. The sign. So are you ready? I'm ready. You can be fully yourself without editing who you are. It's a sign you're in. That makes sense. A friendship that feels like home.
Starting point is 00:38:19 I feel let's do it for each other. I don't want to. It's okay. I don't feel like I have to edit. Okay. Well, I don't feel that either, but I feel like this is a dangerous game to play live. This is both. Okay.
Starting point is 00:38:31 We're getting vulnerable. Okay. You don't overthink text or replay conversations afterwards. I do that sometimes. I was going to say you do that a lot. But that's just you as a person, right? Okay. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:43 But you don't? You don't do that? You don't do that to me? Maybe I should. You don't replay our conversations? I'm just kidding. You know what? I do because last week I feel like there was something.
Starting point is 00:38:56 I don't remember what was, but I do remember last week being like, was I rude? But I didn't say anything to you. You'll actually like text me and be. like, sorry I was this way and I'd be like, what are you talking about? Okay. Silence feels comfortable, not awkward. I can be silent around you. Yeah, same. You feel supported even when you're not at your best. Yeah. Yeah. Check. They celebrate you without making it about them. Yeah. Check. You're really good at that because I think that you are, do you mind me sharing this? Well, I don't know what you're going to say. Well, I feel like you are hyper vigilant to that because even earlier today
Starting point is 00:39:36 when we were talking on the phone and I like randomly said this, I told you I was coming from the doctor and I learned this thing about my placenta. And it was just kind of flipping. And then you said something about yourself and then you said, oh, but I don't, you like came back and made sure you're like, I want you to know that I want to hear more about that if you want to talk about it. Yeah. You do that a lot. Well, because I didn't want to disc, like you were acting like yeah it's fine it's not the big big deal but then i didn't see how you're really feeling about it because it could be it's not it's not something bad like you're you're bought you're not yeah um it's it's not going to harm you you you were the baby yeah but it's still it's it could be disappointing for
Starting point is 00:40:13 people yes i'll share what it is so people don't think we're talking in code i went had a doctor's moment today and they think this isn't confirmed so i can't say for sure but the way that they were hearing the heartbeat sounded like i have an anterior placenta which just means my placenta is in the front which is she said only 30% of what? Nothing. I was just thinking of. Are you making this about you? I'm sharing a really vulnerable part of it.
Starting point is 00:40:46 Okay. I'm kidding. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. When I tell you what I was thinking. I'm adding levity. Okay.
Starting point is 00:40:57 Not to make it about me, but I was thinking about your placenta and eating it. No. Keep going. I don't even know. if like, I could say what I was thinking. Was it dirty? Dirty.
Starting point is 00:41:10 Is it that a whistle? Yep. Well, are you thinking that the whistle is going to hit the placenta? Yes. I don't think that's a thing. Okay. I don't think that's a thing. That would have to go really.
Starting point is 00:41:22 Okay, okay, okay. Okay, we don't have to get too details. I think that would have to be a crazy whistle. Oh, okay. Which Patrick obviously has. Shannon just said, I'm so shut out. Shannon said she's not looking this back. stuff.
Starting point is 00:41:38 That's like, have you seen those, like, have you seen those videos where there's like a scratch on, um, like the wife's back or the husband's bag? It's like a scratch and it's like, you know, six inches long or whatever. And the, like the wife will be like, oh my gosh, this scratch is huge. And then the husbands are like, yeah. Six inches is huge. That's not on my for you page. They're funny.
Starting point is 00:42:11 They're so funny because like as a scratch, you're like, oh my gosh, this scratch is so big. And then the guys are like so big. Heck yeah. Okay. Well, I don't think that's a, I haven't had that issue. And I have not been afraid of that until now. Okay. Finish the thing.
Starting point is 00:42:28 I interrupted with my dirty thought. Yeah. Or inappropriate thought. It wasn't dirty. At least that wasn't you making about you. It's just you being a little bit. I was curious. They didn't tell me that.
Starting point is 00:42:41 I don't think that's a thing, but I could also be wrong because I'm new at this interior placenta thing. And it might not even, I'm not confirmed. They just think that based on how it sounded. It could be a possibility. But all it means really is, and I think I was saying, it's only 30% of people have this. All it means is it's going to take longer for me to feel the baby, which actually make me feel better because I haven't felt her that I know of, I guess, something.
Starting point is 00:43:07 things could be her, but I just don't realize it. And because of the way the placenta is, you don't feel it as it takes longer for you to feel the baby's movement. Gotcha. So instead of like 16 to 20 weeks, it's more probably like 20 to 24 weeks. Right. And that's why I wanted to circle back to see how you were feeling like, oh, because a lot of people look forward to feeling their baby kick.
Starting point is 00:43:27 So, okay. Anywho, back to the list. Okay. It feels like home. This friendship, they celebrate you. making about them. You don't feel like you're, quote, too much or, quote, not enough. I don't experience that.
Starting point is 00:43:46 I don't either. You didn't answer. Okay, sorry. They speak about you with respect even when you're not there. Well, I don't know, but I hope so. Yeah. I do. Look me in the eyes.
Starting point is 00:44:02 I do. You feel calm after seeing them not drained. Mm-hmm. Okay. You don't have to earn your place. It's already yours. Yeah, but you kind of have to earn it in the beginning. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:16 But then we got it. Yeah. Okay. So those are signs your friendship feels like home. I don't know that you have to have, if you don't have every single one of those, it's not like, oh, got to get rid of my friend. Toxic friendship. At all.
Starting point is 00:44:28 Because. Yeah. I think that it's just a list of like. Healthy signs, healthy signs. Healthy signs. Good qualities to having a friendship. Yes. Yes.
Starting point is 00:44:36 Speaking of friendships, I saw another article. This one is, I can give you the, it's from Oxford University. Researchers on average say that most women have a core group of around five friends. However, when a woman gets into a new relationship with a partner, they typically lose two of those friends. You don't know why? Because they have less time. Shocker. someone gets jealous you simply drift away from your former single life which i feel like all of those
Starting point is 00:45:13 makes sense but i'm like dang two drop off that makes sense to me i think i think it depends on like the grouping of your friends because i've experienced that what i actually asked patrick last night we were eating dinner and i said what are i was asking a bunch of different random questions but one of the ones I asked was, what is one friend that you've lost touch with that you wish that you could reconnect with? And we both were talking, both people that we said, the reason that we lost as close of a connection, we would still consider them friends, is because our life stage is different. So whether they had kids or whether it was because we got married or something, like, things just tend to change depending on how those friendships are structured before, you know?
Starting point is 00:45:56 But it's not necessarily bad. I don't think that's always bad. Like my friends who, have had kids and their life has shifted and we're not as close, I'm not over there being like, they ditched me. It just, I'm like, well, their life is different. We can't be the same, we can't do the same things that we used to do. Yeah, it's evolved. Yeah. It just, there's some grief in that, but also I don't, there's not like resentment. Right. That I feel in my relationships. Five friends was shocking, though. Five friends. Like, you have five, having five friends? Yeah. How many do you have? I thought it was, I thought the number. I think I would want to know like what kind of friends because I have more than five friends,
Starting point is 00:46:36 but I don't know that I have. How many bridesmaids did you have? Nine, but three of them were my family. Okay. So that's about six. So you're right. That's about six. That is six.
Starting point is 00:46:53 Nine minus three is six. That's actually six. Okay. So that, and that's close to five. Six is right after five. Yeah. Just about. But some of those friends like, oh, I was one of them.
Starting point is 00:47:06 Yeah. So then, then there's five. Why aren't you one of the way? Well, I don't feel those, the other friends, like I don't feel like I'm part of that group. Like I would. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So that makes sense.
Starting point is 00:47:18 Yeah. Like I am in. But one was a college friend, which like I don't talk to her. We'll like text more than we talk on the phone. She lives in a. different. She lives far away and she has three kids. She brought her like three month old baby to the wedding. You remember? She was a good friend for doing that. So I would still consider her one of my best friends, but we don't talk that often. Right. Yeah, like I talked to my best friend from high school
Starting point is 00:47:45 on Saturday for like 30 minutes. We did a catch up like while I was waiting around at the track meet. And I don't talk to, like I'm going to see her this weekend in Austin because she lives in Austin and every year she comes to our I heart country festival so I see her there and we'll text and we talk but it doesn't matter like she's yeah been my best friend since high school will always be there for each other and we could go months honestly so I would wonder if this study is more like do you lose the friends or do the friendships change yeah I don't know we'll have to look it up because I wouldn't consider that friendship lost and you're like your friendship isn't yeah no she still that didn't like that was me moving.
Starting point is 00:48:29 Like it wasn't because I got into a relationship. Do you feel like you lost friends when you were dating Alex? I feel like I saw my friends less. Yes. But you didn't lose them. No, I didn't lose them. But I mean, I maybe could have. They probably, I think that distance was created just because we naturally did more of
Starting point is 00:48:46 his life. Yeah. Because I have my kids 50% of the time. He has his kids 100% of the time. And they're very active. So we naturally, every weekend it was like. like his stuff because the kids always had things going on. And if they didn't, we need to be close by where they were. So we just ended up and hit his neck of the woods more. And I put some of
Starting point is 00:49:09 that on me. Like I should have been like, hey, let's go do this with some of my friends. But I just was, I don't know. I just was defaulting. It became a default to like, okay, well, you know. Yeah. I was also low testosterone, no eye. Like I didn't have the energy. I would wonder like, because you all dated for around a year and a half. So I wonder if that relationship would have lasted longer, if things would have evened out, even with your friends. Because in the beginning of it, I think I would have had to have made sure we made a concerted effort to do that.
Starting point is 00:49:39 But he would naturally would have happened. I think what I'm trying to say is in the beginning of relationships, in the beginning of relationship can still be a year and a half in. That's still like newish. You're more, like, this isn't going to sound bad, but like you're more excited and you're more apt to like want to like forego things to go spend time with this new person in your life. Naturally, that starts to drop off.
Starting point is 00:50:01 And then I think, not that you'd be like, okay, I'll hang on my friends again now. But like, naturally, I think you would start feeling that again. Yeah. You know? Yes. So I don't want you to feel, you can feel however you want. But I don't think in the beginning of relationships, I have a lot of grace for people in the beginning of relationships because like that you just, that's what happens.
Starting point is 00:50:20 Like you want to spend all your time with this person. Yeah. And so you get it. Yeah. You get it. I know. I think just some of my relationship. I would spend a lot of time with people like even cryocat or Claire like we would walk a lot more.
Starting point is 00:50:31 And then, but I would also then I'd start walking with him. So then he became my walking buddy. So then if I don't have a, you know, it just was, I don't know. I realized it. Anyway. You feel like I'm done with this. Okay. We do have a voicemail that has to do with you, Kat, that I would love for people to hear because it's an interesting perspective.
Starting point is 00:50:56 Pride is like love. You feel it in your heart. IR. Radio, Canada's number one streaming app for radio and podcasts, including IHart Pride Canada, your favorite hits and must have party bangers, plus personalized and curated playlists. Like back in the day Pride. Come together, celebrate love. Take pride with you anytime, anywhere.
Starting point is 00:51:26 Just ask your smart speaker to play IHart Pride Canada. Stream us on your phone or listen now at iHeartRadio.ca. In the moment, it felt like it was going on forever. I didn't think I was going to live. I was terrified. There was no anything inside those eyes. They turned black. It scared the hell out of me.
Starting point is 00:51:53 That was your first murder case? Yes, sir. Fear to say this was the biggest case of your career? Yes, sir. Rape a murder for a young-year-old child. Just as bad as it gets. I would think so. People, wake up.
Starting point is 00:52:05 I'm the one that saw the murder take place. by crevette and de pipo. Anthony DePippo showed no signs of remorse, appearing unfazed after being sentenced to the maximum. I said, I'm not guilty. I'll take it to the grief. Listen to the devil's quarry on the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Starting point is 00:52:32 And to hear the Devil's Quarry ad free with exclusive content, subscribe to Lava for Good Plus on Apple Podcasts. Hey, I'm Hoda Kotby, host of the podcast, Joy 101, One with Hoda Kotby. Together, we're going to have meaningful conversations with the world's most fascinating people. Like when actress Olivia Munn shared how she overcame fierce health challenges. I've gone through breast cancer and then helped my mother through breast cancer. And that was more difficult.
Starting point is 00:53:04 There's a lot of people who understand postpartner depression. I was not prepared for postpartum anxiety. Listen to Joy 101 with Hoda Kotby on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Last night, a blown call changed a game. This morning, the internet lost its mind. Highlights are trending, opinions are flying, and nobody's telling you exactly what happened. That's where Sports Slice comes in.
Starting point is 00:53:26 I'm Timbo. Every episode, we're cutting through the noise. Breaking down the plays, the controversies, and the stories behind the headlines. We go straight to the source, the athletes themselves. Their locker room stories, their reactions, the stuff nobody gets to hear. The laughs, the drama, the triumphs, the moments that never make the highlight real. From viral moments to historic games, from buzzer beaters to controversial, calls, we break it down, give you context, and ask the questions everybody wants answered.
Starting point is 00:53:53 SportsLice brings you closer to the action with stories told by the people who live them. Listen to SportsSlice on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. And for more, follow Timbo Slicelife-Life 12 and the TikTok podcast network on TikTok. Okay, we do have a voicemail that has to do with you, Kat, that I would love for people to hear because it's an interesting perspective. You had shared how your true, honest feelings about your pregnancy. The first trimester. Body image, yeah. Body image stuff.
Starting point is 00:54:27 And so we got a voicemail that's a different experience that you had, but a very important message. I get, well, I don't know that it's different. She was still feeling, but it's like her body wasn't changing that much. It was a perspective, I think. A different perspective. That's the word. So we'll go ahead and play that. This is from McKenna.
Starting point is 00:54:47 Hi, so my name's McKenna. I was just listening to the episode about pregnancy and bodies, like the segment on that. And I had a really interesting experience in the other direction where I'm not like a small person by any means. And during pregnancy, I had HG, which makes you throw up and you're really nauseous all the time. And so throughout the entire, I was pregnant for 41 weeks and three days, I was severely sick. Sominating, nausea, pretty much couldn't eat a full meal. And I was given compliments galore for not gaining weight. And I couldn't express people like what I would give to just be able to eat a full meal.
Starting point is 00:55:25 It just made me really reckon with like how we are talking about pregnant bodies. And we shouldn't be talking about in the middle. But how other people comment on it. And people would tell me it looked so good. And it was almost jarring to know that I was so sick. And I was so, you know, concerned that I couldn't eat and give my baby the proper fuel. and I was just reinforced over and over. So I just wanted to, like, offer some encouragement that just because someone, like,
Starting point is 00:55:51 looks a specific way in their pregnant body does not mean that they are, like, doing any better or worse than what you're going through. And we just need to be able to let our bodies do what they need to do through that season of life. Thank you. Sorry, I just wanted to ramble a little bit. I ramble, too. But I didn't think she was rambling. No, I didn't either.
Starting point is 00:56:10 I think that is a perfect, thank you for sharing that, and a perfect example of why we should not comment on people's bodies. Like, just, again, we can't help the thoughts. So, okay, this is circling back to something we were saying sort of at the beginning is like people were obviously saying to this to her in person. Oh, so these were comments that were being said to her or not. Well, because people are thinking those are positive comments. Yes.
Starting point is 00:56:35 So I think that's a difference. But I think, yes, if I'm having a thought maybe about somebody and they're pregnant about their body, have it. You can't help that you're having the thought. it's natural. You don't have to share that with them because in her case, like, you don't know what she was going through. And that, I mean, that sounds horrible to be sick for that long and the anxiety that I might have about what she was saying, like being able to give my baby nutrients. Like, that's not, it's a different side. It's a different experience that I'm having,
Starting point is 00:57:04 but it's not like a, I wouldn't say it's a better one. Right. And so let's really be mindful of what thoughts we let come out. Out of our mouths. Yeah. And thank you for sharing that. And I'm sorry. like we were saying earlier, the checking yourself, policing yourself. Waste. Why am I saying this? Why am I saying this? But like, how can, like, should we give people like count to five? Well, um, what's that trick Brunee Brown would do before she would, she would do this
Starting point is 00:57:30 before answering a question, an important question. She would twist her ring three times around her finger. Yeah. Let's implement that when we want to make a comment about what somebody looks like. And hopefully most of the time we will not make that comment. You're like, is this a helpful comment? Is this a helpful comment? But in her case, like some people, like you said,
Starting point is 00:57:49 they probably thought they were saying something helpful. But because I don't know this person's exact scenario, I should keep this comment to myself. Keeps this comment to myself. Well, I think that also sends the message, which like, this is, I'm processing this now in real time, but like it sends the message that like we as women, our bodies shouldn't change as we're going through pregnancy.
Starting point is 00:58:10 Right. And that if our bodies don't change us, we're going through pregnancy that most of the time that could mean something's wrong. And so why do we feel? I think there's obviously I could talk about why we feel this way. But there's a lot of messaging even in pregnancy that says like smaller is better. I was more talking about like I, my body's changing, but like I don't look pregnant yet. Like I've accepted that my body will change.
Starting point is 00:58:35 I want to look pregnant because I like, feel like that's exciting. But still it's like, yeah, we are sent the message that our bodies should look. look a certain way through pregnancy, but that is not really what they're supposed to look like. You know? Does that make sense? And everybody's, every single body is different. So people could have healthy pregnancies and not gain the same amount of weight as somebody else. Right.
Starting point is 00:58:59 It's all very relative. So let's just twist the ring and waste. And waste. But, okay, I have to say this about waste. I had this thought. If you say, like, why am I saying this? You might say because it's going to make her feel better. I know.
Starting point is 00:59:15 That's why I threw in the, like, you don't know someone's full scenario or situation, so is this a helpful comment? Probably not. Yeah, we need an acumen for that. And even if you think it might be and you are 99% sure, just go ahead and lean on that 1% that it's not. That's why even with people, like your coworkers, if they've lost weight for some reason and you think, oh, wow, they probably would like to hear, hey, man, you working out?
Starting point is 00:59:41 hey or hey girl you're you're you're yeah you look so good you have no idea is there depression do they have cancer are they because it's work like they might not be sharing with co-workers what they have going on are they stressed yes or they do they have something going on at home like is there something else going on with their body which they where they haven't disclosed what's happening and they're hoping going to work like fingers crossed every day that nobody's going to notice their situation and then, you know, you say something, or if it is eating disorder related, that's where it can be dangerous because then it adds to the celebration that sometimes gives fuel. It's adding fuel to the fire. And think about like if somebody, now she couldn't
Starting point is 01:00:27 help her scenario. Right. But if you are, because people who have eating disorders, get pregnant. So if you also are sharing that with somebody, if take her scenario. but you have an eating disorder versus she's sick. If I'm sharing that, I'm like, good job, girl, you haven't gained any baby weight. You look so good. You're all belly, like all those kind of comments. That also could be telling her eating disorder. You're doing a really good job.
Starting point is 01:00:52 Keep it up. So let's just twist the ring. Twist the ring. This should be the, instead of asking all this questions, it should just be like, I'm doing to twist the ring until I find something else to say. Oh, I like that. I like that. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:01:07 Twist the ring until you find something that. has nothing to do with what they look like. And if you can't find anything else to say, then don't like, don't say anything. Be like, I like your shoes. Even if you hate them. Those shoes are so pretty. I'm not wearing any shoes. Oh.
Starting point is 01:01:26 Crazy. Oh, your toes. These all things. Okay. Well, hopefully that voicemail, I know Kat, you're, you sharing your experience. was so helpful. I know that voicemail will be helpful to other people. And yeah, maybe just the big takeaways. Let's just all pause before we speak, think, do anything. If anybody has read the names, hit me up. I'm going to give it a go eventually. But like if you've read it and you're like,
Starting point is 01:02:01 power through, it gets so much better. I could just use that little nudge of encouragement. Because if I didn't have all the encouragement about Theo of Golden, I would have already put it down. Wow. So you need some encouragement. Yeah, I need some encouragement. Besides, I already know Kelsey's queen of reading, so I know it's going to be good. And I think it was like one of Jenna Bush's, Jenna's picks for the Today Show. She does or she has like a reading thing because it says it on the book.
Starting point is 01:02:27 Jenna's picks. We didn't circle back to this. That is one of the most stressful things I'm dealing with right now. What? The name. Oh, what to name your child. We've chosen a name, but like we haven't chosen a full name. But that confirms my feelings, is that like this name can change the trajectory of their life.
Starting point is 01:02:45 Are you and Patrick going to be in agreement on the name? Yes. Okay. That's fine. The part of this book, and this is early on so I don't feel like I'm spoiling anything, is the husband does not agree with her name choice. So it impacts their relationship. Oh.
Starting point is 01:03:05 So it impacts how he treats her and the kid. A child. Okay. Okay. I'm thinking like their personality develops differently based on what their name is. Well, I mean, maybe a little bit. I haven't gotten to other chapters or other parts or other bolts. Other bolts.
Starting point is 01:03:20 I haven't gotten to that bulk of the book yet. But if you've read the names, let me know because I will take the encouragement. And also if you were like, I'm like you, I only could read a little bit. I don't know if I want to hear that. Because you want to read it. Because I want to read it. Yeah. Yeah, this is my year of reading and I really don't want to give up on a book.
Starting point is 01:03:42 Yeah. I'm okay to do that. I know. People have different tastes. Yeah. Which, speaking of books, tomorrow I'm doing a very special bonus episode. This is something we haven't done before, really. But Matt Smallbone, who is a pastor here in Nashville, he came on the Four Things podcast
Starting point is 01:04:02 with me a couple of times. And he has a book coming out. And so we sat down and did a bonus episode. So it'll be loading up tomorrow on Wednesday. And he wrote a book called The Prayer Experiment. And this is his first book, his debut, sort of like the author of Theo of Golden. But what he did was he started praying the Lord's Prayer and used that as an outline to his prayers after going through a miscarriage. And then he's a pastor that was like not praying because he was like, I don't want to pray anymore.
Starting point is 01:04:37 So he decided to dedicate an entire year to praying a very specific way. And it transformed his prayer life. So he wrote a book about it called The Prayer Experiment and I'll be sitting down with him. Or I already did. Pre-taped. And it'll load up tomorrow. But I love Matt Smallbone. He's Australian.
Starting point is 01:04:57 So if anything, tune in for the accent. The accent. And his cousins are for King and Country. Do you know them? Mm-hmm. Yeah. And I think that one of them has a publishing. company they were the ones that i believe like we're cheering him on like dude dude the story we got
Starting point is 01:05:13 to write to book say dude and with gosh dude dude he says i can only do it with the with the words he says to me like aims he calls me aim does my nickname aim hey good on you aim he'll say good on you well because i can repeat what i hear him say okay and then he said ben my ex has been even in the episode he goes is it okay if i say this and i was like well we're recording And he's like, Bin's one of my best mates. And I was like, I love that for y'all. So best mate. Ben's one of my best mates.
Starting point is 01:05:45 I think Australian and Irish accents are really hard to do. So, yeah. Good on yeah for being so good at it. Good on, yeah. So if that's sort of your jam, your thing, then check out that bonus episode tomorrow. And Kat and I will be back together on Thursday for we're resuming our normal couch talks, Q&A. Last week we had an interview. I know.
Starting point is 01:06:06 two interviews in a week. One on couch talks. One is a bonus episode. But we are back to answering your questions. Yeah, you, the listener. Well, to be fair, we answered their questions. Oh, yeah. And Mississippi and David interview. True, true, true. Okay. Well, we hope wherever you are, you have the day. You need to have. Bye. Bye. Joy is essential and it's also elusive. But now, there's a new and exciting way to start your journey toward a more joyful existence. Joy 101. It's a new podcast hosted by me, Hoda Kotby.
Starting point is 01:06:49 If you're craving inspiration to maximize your joy, tune into these candid, uplifting, and moving on-air chats. Open your free I-Heart Radio app. Search Joy 101 and listen now. Joy 101 with Hoda Kotby is presented by CVS. There was no anything inside those eyes. They turned black. It scared the hell.
Starting point is 01:07:15 out of me. Evil, wake up. I'm the one that saw the murder take place by Krivac and DePippo. Anthony DePippo showed no signs of remorse, appearing unfazed after being sentenced to the maximum.
Starting point is 01:07:31 I said, I'm not guilty. I'll take it to the grave. Listen to the devil's quarry in the Bone Valley Feed on the Iheart Radio app. Apple Podcasts, wherever you get your podcasts. All right, listen up. The Jonas Brothers here. Our podcast is called Hey Jonas.
Starting point is 01:07:53 We figure since everyone has a podcast, we want it to as well. And we've had some incredible guests so far. And now our good friend, Nile Horn, is joining the show. How's it going, boys? Hey, Niall. It's the same thing with Slow Hands. Slow Hands is not about anything else, really, is it? You know, or taste so good can't be about food.
Starting point is 01:08:08 You do the same, Nick, with some of the stuff that you've done. You too, Joe. Drop what you're doing and listen to Hey Jonas on the Iheart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your podcasts. See me as a football player, but before anything else, I'm human. Every single day, I'm still learning how to live with problems, mistakes, relationships, emotions, ever since I was born. This isn't a normal podcast. Everything here is spontaneous, real, and genuine.
Starting point is 01:08:35 Just honest conversations about what it means to be alive. I'm Javier Tchariot Hernandez and listen to Learning to Be Human on IHard Radio, Apple Podcasts, or whatever you get your podcast. This is an IHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.

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