The Bobby Bones Show - (Thurs Early Bird) Companies We’d Buy and Make Better if We Had Elon Musk Money + Things We Faked Early in our Relationships + The Return of Elder vs. Millennial!

Episode Date: April 28, 2022

We each share a company we would buy if we had as much money as Elon Musk plus what we’d do to make them better. We each share things we faked early in our relationships such as Bobby pretending he was more fun. Eddie and Morgan face off in a new season of Elder vs. Millennial!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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from Jerry in Kentucky. I've got two things. The first is how did Amy's cake turn out, her Korean cake that she may turn out? Second thing is

we just got more proof that lunchbox is Sissy Boy because he didn't say nothing to the airport guy about calling his wife Sunshine. 100% hitting on her.

Lunchbox is a Sissy boy. I love the show. Peace. All right, Jerry. Thanks for the call. Amy talked about the cake a little bit a couple days ago. And so you made the cake from YouTube, but it was a disaster. Total disaster. It tasted okay-ish.

My daughter definitely didn't like the look or the taste. I made a whole video about it. It's on my Instagram. And so she had a big birthday party for her daughter, but your daughter wanted a mini-fridge. I guess that's the update that I want. She's been asking you for a mini-fridge in her room for over a year. Did you get her a mini-fridge? We did.

Oh, wow. What's up now? Cool mom, right here. Was it because Bobby told you then? Yeah, it's all because of Bobby. No. Bobby's the cool dad, really. Uncle.

Uncle. Yeah, that's weird. Yeah, that'd be very strange. This is where it comes out. Okay. Bad used to turn there. We'll go cool. Uncle, he's the one that influenced you.

You gave into peer pressure from Bobby. I just didn't think a fridge was bad. Okay, so my husband and I made this decision together, and what we decided to do was replaced one of her nightstands. So we pulled out a nightstand and put that. one in and she's got her lamp and her plant and her little coasters on top of the fridge. So it looks like a nightstand because I was like, how are we even going to fit a mini fridge in your room? There's no, there's not a spot. And so she solved that problem real quick.

And it's now a nightstand and it's full of all kinds of things. So she got a mini fridge, anything else for her birthday? She got her ears triple pierce. Well, she already had two holes on each side and now she has three, which I thought was a really big deal for 15 because I didn't have three on each side until I was 40. Where you're going with that logic? Well, I didn't get it until I. Yeah. And I told her I didn't even have a mini fridge ever,

till college probably, I guess. Well, that's not ever then. I didn't have one ever, well, until college. Hey, Morgan, how many piercings do you have? I have two on each ear and a belly button ring piercing. Oh, I just meant ear. That was a total. Well, no.

Feel creepy. All right, we're moving on here. Let's get started with Thursday show. It is time to open up the main. mail bag. You send me email and we read it on the air. It's something we call Bobby's Mailbag. Yeah.

Hello, Bobby Bones. I just found out that my friend's four-year-old daughter might not be his daughter. In fact, I'm pretty certain it's his fiance's ex-boyfriend's kid. Whoa. So I was with someone. They'd been drinking a lot and they told me that the baby was not my friend's baby, but the guy she was dating before my friend. Well, so here we are.

Do I tell him what I learned? Do I tell him about a rumor that I heard? What do I do? Signed David. All right. That's a serious one there. It is just hearsay. Does the baby look like?

I don't know. There's a lot of questions I would have. Does the baby look like the dude that's supposed to be the kid up? All right. So my first question would be, do you think it's best that he goes and talks to the mom of the baby first? It's tough No Why?

Because if he goes to the friend Who she's about to marry But that's your friend You're blowing things up I know but go see if she'll admit to you And then try to talk her into telling the truth to him My instinct would we go to my friend first What if it's not true?

It's my friend though I'd say hey Eddie This is what I heard Probably not true But I just want to tell you what I heard So supposedly Your kid is not your kid And I would not be your good friend if I didn't tell you that.

Dang. Yeah, that's a bomb to drop for sure. Uh-huh. And so then Eddie has to go to her and say, hey, I need a paternity test. And then it ruins their relationship and it's really the baby. He doesn't. And it's just like, yeah, no, this is my kid. I don't care what you say.

It's going to be my kid. But I'd still think there would be some sort of paternity test. You could secretly paternity test baby. Just get a swab and do that deal. What about doing the whole, it's all hearsay. Let them figure it out later in life. You mean? I just stay out of it.

I don't know if I can get involved. Oh, that's too much. If I hear that and it's your close friend, I think you have to say something, right? Maybe you just casually be like, so, ha ha, ha, you're never going to believe what I heard. That's a weird laugh. So I know something's about to come.

If somebody comes to me laughing like that. But like, awkward, like, ha, you're never going to believe this crazy rumor. It's probably not true. There's no way this is true. But can you believe that someone's saying that's not really your baby? Amy's doing like an 80s comedy act

What's the deal with the baby? Is it yours or is it not? Something like that. Just, I don't know. The whole situation is not good. If I'm the person that hears this, I have to go tell the friend. It's not going to be comfortable.

He may get mad at you. Because he's just going to be mad and want to take it out or sad and want to take it out somewhere probably. But I think I would go and say, hey, this is what I heard. I don't personally believe it. But if I didn't tell you this,

I wouldn't feel good. about it, then you probably have to tell them. Okay. Yeah, man, I'll let you do that. Let us know how that goes. Maybe because I'm the girl. I see myself going to that mom. Yeah, but if I don't have a relationship with her at all, that's weird.

That's a weird. That's a weird. Of course, it's weird. The whole thing's weird. But how do I get that time? Like, hey, can I get five minutes? Yeah. Oh, you got to start.

Hey, man, you got a second. Voice memo. It's a woman. Oh, yes. That's what I do. That's right. You know, to look at her. Yeah.

Oh, email her. Yeah. This is what I say. You have to teach your friend up about it and say, hey, can you talk for a few minutes? This is what I heard. I don't believe that it's true, but if I didn't tell you this, I wouldn't feel like I was being a good friend.

So here it is. Don't believe it's true, but I just wanted you to know. And then let him have it, and he should do what he... He may do nothing and go, that's bull crap, that's my kid. Or he may go, I want to have a paternity test. It proves him right or wrong. That's it. It is not comfortable. Or...

Reading this email wasn't comfortable? Or one last thing. Well, you know, Eddie did mention, I think. Is he secretly testing the baby? No, no, I did. Oh, you did? I just said, just ignore the whole thing. Eddie said ignore the whole thing.

Okay, so you said secretly test it. Even as a friend, you can secretly test it. How do you do that? Can you? Let me babysit that baby for an hour. Take swabs? Pay no attention to the swabs everywhere. Pulling its hair out.

Yes. Okay. That would be my advice. You got to say something. All right, that's the mailbag. If you want to send something in, Morgan, what is that address? Mailbag at bobbybones.com. All right, thank you guys. We got your email and we read it on your air.

I'm the clothes Bobby's mailback. Yeah. The RAM 1500 exceeds all expectations with available features like a 12-inch touchscreen, digital rearview mirror, multi-functional tailgate, and a panoramic sunroof. So if you're thinking about switching trucks, now is the perfect time. Learn more at ram.com. That's ram.com. Time for Elder versus millennial.

Eddie, are you ready? Oh, yes. Your first question that Morgan would know the answer to. How many members were in one direction? Yeah. Malik. Yeah, I tried to name one Malik. Oh, gosh.

Harry. Nile. Tomlinson. God, he's got to be one more. I'd say five. There's one more I'm forgetting. Lenny. The answer's five.

Yeah. Who is the fifth? Malik and Lenny aren't people, but I don't know how you did. Zane Malik. Oh, Zane Malik. Malik. So who did I forget? You forgot.

There's Nile, Liam, Liam, Harry. Liam. Huh? I forgot Liam. You said Tomlinson. Louis Tomlinson. Okay.

And Zane Mallet. Got it. Yeah, yeah. They're good, man. I like that. Well, they're not a thing anymore. I know, but the good music they put out. Okay.

So Eddie's answering questions about Morgan's generation. This is called Elder versus Millennial. It's Eddie the oldest versus Morgan number two, the youngest. They get three questions. You heard him answer one. Yeah. He's a Dadafore. He's the Hispanic who don't panic.

Together, we recently opened for Garth Brooks. Now he's singing and he's showing off his good looks. Yay! Because our listeners say they're now attracted to him. They said they have crush his honor. There is Eddie. Good job, buddy. All right for question number two. I'm ready.

The listener said, I have such a crush on Eddie. Yeah, she did say that. We were like, Eddie who? Which one? Eddie, what actor turned pop star played page on the Disney Channel show Bazaard Vark from 2016 to 2019?

What actor turned pop star played Page on Bizarred Vark? Here's the theme song to Bizarre Dvark. Man, I remember Bizarred Vark. Look at my son watched that one. I don't know. I'm going to go with Ariana Grande. Incorrect. Morgan, you can steal.

Now, Bazaar Vark's a little even beyond you. Yeah, I wasn't watching Disney at this point. But, I mean, I have two guesses, Dove Cameron or Sophia Carson. And I don't even know if it's either one of those. Who are they? But I'm going to go, Sophia. Carson. That's incorrect. You would have stolen if you'd have said Olivia Rodriguez.

Really? Eddie, your final question. Come on. Tiana made history in 2009 as the first African-American Disney princess. What movie is her character from? Tiana made history in 2009 as the first African-American Disney princess. What movie is her character from? Is that princess in the frog?

Never seen that one. I think it's Princess and the Frog. Princess and the Frog. Why are you looking to me like that? That's correct. Okay, let's go. I'm just looking, buddy. No other reason?

The dramatic pause. And now Eddie's opponent, she runs all of our digital. She's never known a world without the internet and doesn't know the pain of rewinding a cassette. It's Morgan number two!

Alright Morgan. Morgan's the raining chant, by the way, as we start a new season. Yeah. What was the name of the first? toy popular throughout the 90s that some people thought was spying on them. The original is our iPhone watching us. Oh.

Was this. The furry toy popular in the 90s that some people thought was spying on them. The only furry toy I know of that was in the 90s was a Furby. I don't remember people thinking they spied on us, but maybe they did. So I'm going to go with Furby. Furby is correct. Woo! Nice job.

Who had a hit. even won a Grammy in 1991 for this song right here. You can't touch this. Does that sound familiar? Yeah, because you dance to it on Dancing with the Stars. That's correct. Do you know who it is? MC Hammer.

That's correct. Impressive. And now we are on our final question. If she gets it, she wins. Eddie, if you steal it, you win. Okay. Jagged Little Pill was the best-selling alternative album of the 1990s, also one of the best-selling albums in general.

Who was the artist? who released that album. Here's a clip of a song called Ironic. Can you name it, Morgan, for the win? Talk it out. Who do you think it could be? My gut feeling is that it's Alanis Morissette. Who else are you thinking?

That's really all I have. I mean, I'm not like, like Hart. I was like a girl band, but that was two, maybe more than two. But I'm going to go with Alanis Morissette. She says Alanis Morissette. Hart was from a generation before earlier.

I'm surprising you with Hart. The answer is Atlantis Morsex. Nice job. Morgan's a big win. Big win. Are you said any? So dumb. I can't believe she got that.

Like all of that. What? Burby, Alanis. That's good. There's a great Atlanta's documentary on HBO Max. It's called, I think, Jagged Little Pill. Really? Really good.

Yeah, it's really, really good. And Morgan, you're really good. You're our winner. Congratulations. There she is. One in O'N'O on the season. Want Better Skin from Your Body Wash? Try Ole Body Wash with Skin Care

super ingredient collagen. OLE body wash hydrates for healthier looking skin in just 14 days. From dry and dull to firm and radiant. With OLE body, you feel fearless in your skin. It's time for the good news. With Amy. Tell me something good. So this husband and wife in Arizona, John and Angie, they started a nonprofit called Low Crawl hugs so that they could give Marines hugs. Now, some people might find a little creepy hugging strangers, but they also give out cupcakes and pizza. And what they do is they show up on base

when these Marines are coming back from boot camp, which is grueling, emotional, exhausting, tired. And a lot of Marines, when they come back, they have family waiting for them. So they get maybe some food and some hugs and some love. But some come back and no one is there waiting. So that's where John and Angie come in and they pass out those hugs to Marines that need it,

or the snacks and the treats. What's it called again? Low crawl hugs. Why is it called low crows? Because when you're at boot camp, you do that thing on the ground where you're on your elbows practicing that low crawl. And he was in the Marine, so he knew how that was like the hardest thing for him at camp. And he got emotional when his son went away to boot camp and had to do the low crawl. I guess it's just like one of those things that really hit home with him.

So that's what they decided to call it. I had to do low crawl. For what? Training for something? Well, let's just say I used to run cables under houses. Oh, it's a little different. And it's. Yeah, the crawl space.

I mean low crawl And it was awful They'd be like We're putting a cord down in this room So I have to get on my belly and crawl That does look really hard too Not the same as that But miserable and scary

And gross Nobody gave me a hug or a cupcake when I got out Just went to the next house Come on come over here I'll give you one Thanks Eddie All right Amy good story That's what it's all about That was tell me something good

So one of the big stories is that Elon Musk is buying Twitter And it's a big story because he's paying so much money for, $44 billion. He just was like, I like this business, I want to do something with it, I'm going to buy it. Golly, that'd be awesome. We'll be able to buy something. So the question I'm going to pose to you guys, what company would you buy?

Let's say you had 50 billion bucks, okay? Now, you're not going to be able to buy Apple with $50 billion. Really? You could. Not enough money? You could. Let's not limit our dreams here. Okay, all right.

What company would you buy, and how would you change it to make it better? I got a few of them here. first up I'd buy Uber and there are little things that I would do I'd be able to star my favorite drivers so if they were around I could request them specifically I like that that's not even a hard one

like I had a great time with this person star and then it's like would you like to see if any of your star drivers are near you if so maybe you want to wait a few extra minutes so that they can get to you that's pretty cool Uber eats which by the way got a gift card from Eddie from Oh my gosh

Where is it? Happy birthday Where's the gift card? You used it No, I don't. Move on with your idea, please. I don't know where it is. I can't find it. It's in a drawer. Just talk about your idea.

I would say this is what I would do. I want them to take the food and put it on a scale right when they get it, like a little weight scale. And I want to see what that weight is. And then when they get to my house, they weigh it again to prove they hadn't eat any of it. Oh, no. It needs to be the same scale, though, because sometimes scales are different. That's fine. They have a scale in their car.

Okay. And I just need to know they're not eating. That's a lot of work. No, it's not. Maybe the scale built into an app on a phone. Yeah, it's in the car. Yeah, so the driver will just eat it, then put it on the scale. No, he's got to do it as soon as he gets it. It's on the app on his phone.

So you do it, boom, done, and then you give it back to me. Boom, weigh it. I see if he's eating my food. I like it. Thank you. Instagram. There's a blue check mark for people that have some sort of notoriety. We give a red check mark to the jerks that are always trolling and leave a bad comments for people. Love it.

Love it. Maybe not even a check mark. You give them like a red. Thumbs down. The red thumbs down. Garlet letter. Yes, yes. Oh.

Or something. Those are for the cheaters? I don't know. I don't want to steal any of your companies. I have more. So I'm going to hold on mine. You won't get mine. I won't.

No chance. Okay, Southwest Airlines. Allow flight attendants to duct tape anybody they see is unruly at any time. They have duct tape on their hips like, do woo-woo. Ready to go, whatever. Yes, let's go. Okay. I don't want to run through all mine.

Amy, go ahead. What is yours? Yeah. There's no way you're getting this because I'm buying an entire country. Yeah. No, a company. A company. You can't buy a country.

Did you misread it? No. I didn't know there was rules. The role was what company would you buy and how would you make it better? Any country. It doesn't say any country. Okay, let's humor her. Oh my goodness.

If the internet is correct, Haiti is worth about $8 billion. I'm going to buy it and then I'm going to invest about $8 billion to clean it up, get all the gangsters out, fix the roads up. So that way I can visit there with my kids. That's just like World Peace. I'd invest money in that world. It makes everybody could eat. Yeah, but I just really want to go back there. No, no, I know, but I don't...

I bet there's a company that does that. Thank you, Amy. Well, no, nobody's doing it. Thank you, Amy. I don't see anybody else buying it and trying to clean it up. I like that. Good one. My daughter wants to go back.

I know, but that's a whole separate thing than this, bit. Because I'd buy the world. I'm not going to make sure everybody got a Coke. I'm going to buy Hawaii. You can't buy the world. Okay, Eddie. Oh, mine's awesome. I would buy NASCAR.

I've been watching NASCAR lately, and it's fine. It's fun, but it gets boring. They go over and over in the same circle. I say make it more like Mario Kart, where they get the chance to throw banana peels, turtle shells out, oil slick, whatever, just to make the guy behind them wreck, make it more of an exciting sport.

I like Mario Kart and NASCAR. That's fun. Come on. That's good. Hey, that's showbiz, baby. That's right. Let's make some money. That's right. Lunchbox.

Well, I thought about when buying the lottery, like the whole lottery system, but then I couldn't play the lottery. So I had to X that out. And I'm going to buy Onlyfans. The site that people get on and do naked stuff. Yes. Why?

Because there are some weird ones on there and gross ones that I don't agree with and I would eliminate them and I would recruit more hotties. A lot of the people on Onlyfans are just semi-hot. I would go out to the super hot and pay a bigger salary to bring more business to it. Okay. And he'd want to be hands-on too. And I would like to buy MTV. Okay.

Because I would bring the real world back. I would bring road rules back. And also, 16 and pregnant hadn't been on in a long time. They have teen mom now, but they don't have 16 and pregnant. I would go back out and find 16-year-olds that are pregnant and put them on TV. They only show... I was going to jail. Yeah, a couple things here.

A couple things here. That's creepy. I just want to acknowledge that by saying that statement's creepy. I just want to acknowledge that. It gave such good ratings to MTV that they don't make it anymore. Well, I don't know what happened to that. Secondly, they only show one show on MTV now, basically. It's the show ridiculousness.

And that is, it's all day every day. And it's a terrible show. Terrible. Hey, Morgan, if you had Elon Musk money, what company would you buy and how would you make it better? I would buy NASA and share all of the details about aliens so we can all finally get that information and go on expedition so we can discover other planets. Wow, that's cool. Love it. Had the same exact one.

I'm going to let you my company, Morgan. Yes. Because I'm going to outbid you. And then I'm not high. Wow. You don't know if she has more money than you. That's true. I made the rolls up.

I got a couple more here. Ray, do you have one, by the way? Yeah, I'm going with Pizza Hut, and I'm bringing back some of the old favorites that they just took off the menu for whatever reason. The New York style was amazing. Bring that pizza back. Also, allow me to have Chicago-style pizza without going to Chicago.

I want that to be in Nashville. A lot of the Pizza Hutts now don't deliver for whatever reason, so we're going to have the biggest fleet of drivers that are going to bring your pizzas to you. Uber, buddy, I already bought them. I help you out. We'll team up. I think they only deliver, but go ahead.

Not by me. Move where I am. And anyways, the Pazone, please. It's so easy to eat for lunch. It's off the menu and the flavored sauces. Where did they go? It's all coming, baby. Okay.

I'd buy Apple. Since we can now do that, I'd make the iPhones come with chargers and headphones again. Yes. They don't anymore. You got to buy them separately. I'd buy Marvel, and I'd take all those movies that I love, and I'd make them an hour and 30 minutes. It's shorter.

Yeah. Yeah. This is too dang long. And then YouTube, I would take the, No 30 second ads for a 15 second clip. You're going to show me a 30 second ad. The video needs to be at least three minutes. So there you go.

Nice. Thank you. It's a good job, though, everybody. So do you think you'll ever buy one of those? No. So which one was the best pitch? Probably Haiti, right? Okay, Hater.

Hey, countries are businesses. And he was like, I buy the solar system and make solar system peace. There'll be no fighting in my solar system. I hate y'all. Okay. And now a word from our sponsor, BetterHelp. The stigma of therapy. I hate it because, listen, I had to feel it a long time, too, when I got into therapy.

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See why over 2 million people have used BetterHelp online therapy. Get 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com slash bones. BetterHELP.com slash bones. All right. This is Maya in Springfield, Missouri, who left us a voicemail last night. I'm calling because I'm a totally huge Sonic fan. And recently my Sonic app got hacked. So I have a question.

When I look at the Sonic app, it looks like the people who hacked my account also tipped their car hop on my app. So is it a good thing that they hacked my app and could help somebody else? Or should I be super offended that not only did they take my money, but they also used it to tip somebody. It's not a good thing they hacked your app. Never a good thing. Lunchbox got his Uber app hacked and that ain't a good thing. No, when you get 44 charges from Uber on your account, not a good thing.

But they did at least tip. At least they weren't a mean hacker. That's funny. They have a little bit of a heart. If I'm a judge, you may make them a little bit of leniency, but still, that wasn't even their money they tipped. You know, I got a message from LifeLock two days ago that said your information is on the dark web. One of your apps has been hacked. What?

And I won't tell you which one it is. But I went and changed my password immediately and nothing was stolen from it. But that LifeLock works. Because they said your name and password and information It's on the dark web. We just found it. You need to go and change your first. They called it the dark web? Yeah, it's on the dark web. Interesting.

So I don't know that I'd give this person any leniency for hacking. Oh, it wasn't their money. If I'm going to try to hack something, I'm going to go bigger. And I have no problem tipping with your money. I'd give a big tip. And maybe, I guess the thing is, if you get your money back, maybe you don't take that tip back. Leave that tip. Oh, yeah.

The person still works. Leave that tip. Thank you guys for hanging out with us this morning. I do want to talk about this. there's a study that says most people, when they start dating someone, they fake healthy eating. They fake like, oh, I just like to give me a salad, grilled chicken. But in reality, they're not near as healthy. But my question is, what did you fake early on to kind of lure your person in?

And I'll go first. I probably faked with Caitlin that I was a little more fun than I really am. That's funny. You were down to do more. I was like, I love it, adventures. Let's do adventures. Let's do some laughing. Let's just do stuff.

Spur the moment. You must have been exhausted. Oh, man. I'm so spontaneous. Smash cut. No, I just want to stay home. Give me some internet. So I think she thought I was a little more interesting in that way.

A hike! I can't get enough hikes. Oh, no. Now? Now, I don't even want to walk to the driveway to get Uber Eats. So that's probably how I faked a little bit with Caitlin. I acted a little more interested. than I probably was.

You, Amy? I acted like, because he was in the military, Air Force, and had to live other places that I'd quit my job right away and move with him. Oh, so you lied. I started acting like, that's a lie. Well, I thought I would. I mean, I was just buying time to see what would really happen.

But, I mean, I think I was even faking myself out. And then when it came down to it, I was like, well, we can work something out. So we ended up looking at his deployment schedule and I was like, look, you're going to be in Afghanistan. I can live with my mom. So we didn't live together at our first two years of marriage. But you did move with him to North Carolina.

I think I tried to quit the show like three times. And he was a part of that equation. And I'm still here. And I kept building her studios in different places. Like, you ain't going anywhere. One time we had a whole going way party for it. Oh, yeah. And then we built our studio in North Carolina.

Yeah, and he was like, what, though? Eddie? For sure, me, it was that I was cleaner than I really am. When she'd come to my apartment, she would always say, like, oh my gosh, this is a clean. guy's apartment I've ever been to. Like, it's spotless. But now, I mean, I just throw my clothes everywhere.

I don't clean. And so she's like, that was totally fake. Lunchbox? Money. We'd go out to dinner and she'd order a glass of wine. I'd be like, we'll just get the whole bottle. Just because, you know, no big deal. I don't even like wine.

I don't even like wine. But I'd be like, yeah, we'll just get the whole bottle. And I'm sitting there going, this is not good. I'm going to pay that whole bottle. But, hey, girl, you go and get that whole bottle. And we'd go to the bar. She'd order a well drink. Oh, yeah, you know, get the expensive stuff.

Yeah. Yeah, and man, it would be like, oh, that... What about now? Now, we have severed money, so it doesn't matter. She pays for herself. But at that point, I was trying to impress her and be like, whoa, but then once we started getting down to it, it's like, oh, you know what, I'm not going to pay for everything for the rest of your life.

Scuba, didn't you fake being rich and you took out all your 401K? Yeah, very similar to lunchbox, yeah, but I cashed in my 401k, so I had money to spend while we were first dating. He tried to, it says you're now wife. My now wife. He cashed out his 401k to try to impress her. On what kind of stuff, though? So I was living in San Francisco, and it's very expensive to go out there.

So it was like dinners and tickets to a show and movies and a little getaway vacation in Napa, that kind of stuff. Napa? But it worked, though, because I feel like it's okay in a sense because it then, not saying she's shallow and needs money, but it allows me to take her around. And while we're doing these things, she gets to know me and my personality. Otherwise, she would probably never go out me because we couldn't go anywhere. When did you have to reveal to her that you were not? Well, I wanted to be gentle about my words.

When did you reveal that that was a bit of a facade? It was about when the money started to run out, which is about three or four months. And then she was like, hey, come out and see me in East Bay. And I was like, well, I can't afford a fare on the subway to get out there and see you. Can you Venmo me at the time? Can you some money to my checking account to come see you? You would ask your wife to send you money to social? So I'd come see her because I couldn't see her.

She lived 45 minutes away. I had no car. I had to rely on public transportation that I couldn't afford any of. So you went from taking her on vacations to Napa to can you pay for my train ride? Yes, to come and see you. And she still married you, but you got her by then. Yeah, I had her by then. The silver lining, too, was in she looked at my finances and my credit score and helped clean me up.

She helped clean you up. She helped clean me up. Did she pay off any of your debt? She didn't pay off my debt, but she put a system together, like a Dave Ramsey kind of thing, and how to clear my debt. So it actually worked out great for me. So you lured her in, wow, to do your dirty work. I mean, not really, but yes.

Wow. Ray Mundo, what did you lie to your now wife Bay about? Yeah, I would have to say my height for the first six months that I dated her. I was always wearing cowboy boots, which would give me a solid three inches. And then I distinctly remember in the relationship down the road, she goes, I didn't have any shoes on at the apartment. She was like, you're actually kind of short. And I was like, yeah, I mean, this is my height. But I didn't realize, I mean, yeah, I'd been rocking boots for a while.

Ray was in boots or laying down, you know what I'm saying? Who said everybody's same height? Ray said that, everybody's same height laying down? That is creepy, but fitting. Yes. All right, thank you guys. I can't leave Scoobis spent a 401k. I know. But it worked.

It was an investment, right? It was a great investment, right? Fair Harbor makes the world's most comfortable beachware. They've replaced mesh lining with their incredibly soft, breeze-knit boxer brief liner. Go to fair harbor clothing.com. use the promo code comfort 22 for 20% off and say goodbye to mesh lining forever. This is Scott in Ohio who wants to talk about the storage unit that Lunchbox and I bought.

I just wanted to call say those unmentionable your storage unit are from the curse of the squirrel. Think about that. Have a good day, guys. So Lunchbox's new nickname is Squirrel. No, it's not. We're not going with that. So we bought a storage unit, but we can't say what's all in it because we think the person was up to no good. some shady illegal stuff, what we found in it. And so this guy says it's the curse of the squirrel, which is the haunted doll.

A lot of curses and a lot of nicknames. And you're a squirrel. You're our squirrel. No, I'm not squirrel. If you see lunchbox out and about, be like, squirrel! No, we're not doing that. The reason is because the guy went and looked at lunchbox's picture, I was like, you're not big enough to be a lunchbox or like your voice.

You're more like a squirrel. And we all thought that's pretty funny. Pretty funny. Yeah. Thanks for that call. If you want to leave us a voicemail, 877-77 Bobby. That's our number. Let's play one more here. Hey, Bobby. Just wanted to let you all know that I received my WWE developmental contract, and I'm excited to know you're a big Raskin fan, so I thought I would give you a call. Love the show.

That's some serious physical work right there. He's going to be a wrestler? Well, he's got a contract to develop. That's crazy. That's awesome. Here's Amy's pile of stories. Looks like 92% of people think they're a good neighbor. Would you put yourself in that category? You just exist.

Yeah, I don't know my neighbors. Yeah. And I never have been a guy to go knock on a door and be like, Heidi ho neighbor. They're right. So I think if there was a fire, I would help. But I don't know them. So I would just say that I'm a C neighbor.

Well, if you're looking to improve your neighborly interactions, I have a list of the top things that make a good neighbor. I just want people in my business. Right, me too. This is more, this is how I grew up. This list of things, this is how I grew up. And now I'm like, why do we not have this? With some of my neighbors, I have it.

Other neighbors, they don't even wave at me. Well, some of your neighbors told you to get out of the town or something, didn't they? What did she tell you? Like, she sent you a letter. She was like, you were all talking about you. The whole town's talking about you? Yeah, that was my old neighborhood. That was a, that was a rough time.

I forgot about that. What did she tell you? That hurt my feelings more than I really think I allowed it at the time. she basically sent me an email and said that she's from Nashville she used to being around famous people and I basically paraphrasing

I need to get over myself and I'm rude and when I'm walking I can wave and that I'm too good for them and she signed it from the whole neighborhood basically she signed it da da da da da da da moms

like it was her and her mom's a meeting about Amy are we gonna send this letter yeah so then that made me super self-conscious walking around my neighborhood Amy's just waving all the time like a parade

yeah is not who you are, obviously. No, I just, I didn't notice she was waving. And then she asked at the bottom if our kids ever wanted to hang out, let her know. I'm like, okay. What? All right, what's the list here? How to be a good neighbor? Except packages or deliveries for neighbors that are away? They drop some off in my house sometimes for neighbors, accidentally. And then you go return it to the neighbor? Yeah. Okay. That's good. Good neighbor. Okay. Keep an eye out on your neighbor's home. Does it count returning of? I just tell the guy who brings it. That's not mine. You dropped it off yesterday.

Not really. Is that, oh, it doesn't it? You could go physically over to the neighbor's house and knock and say, hey, I got your package. I'm not going to do that, but I tell the guy, hey, this is not for me. I think it's for the house next door. You're supposed to do that. Yeah. Yeah, I'm just, yeah. Like, neighborhood watch. Keep an eye on your neighbor's house. Another one.

Warn your neighbors before you have a party. Of course. That's nice. I don't. Water their plants or feed their pets if they're away. Massage them as they sleep. This is dumbest left ever heard. No, and then this one's good.

Offer to split cost of things. For example, like fencing on the property line, which we just had to have that done with one of our neighbors, not a fence, but this, like, plumbing issue. and we emailed them, hey, you want to split the cost? And they said, yes. I was like, that's what I'm talking about. You're a good neighbor.

To my neighbors out there, let's just, if we need each other, let's exist in each other's lives. If not, let's just be cool. Okay. All right. A four-year-old boy in Ohio used his grandma's phone to place an Uber Eats order. He'd seen his family use the app before, so he knew exactly what to do, and he ordered $2 worth of goodies from Starbucks and Duncan. I felt that.

And he even left a $32 tip. Oh, that's nice. It's so nice. Nice job, kid. In a recent interview, Luke Ryan talked about working at his dad's peanut mill after college. They were 15-hour days that left him so rung out. He said it felt like he'd been in a gang fight. I don't know how he knows.

How does you know what a gang fight feels like? I was confused on that part. But he still went out and played gigs and concerts on the weekends. That was his grind. That was his hustle. And I don't know. I was just thinking, like, what's your most physically grueling job? I got a bunch of them because all I did was labor.

I mean, roofing houses. Oh, that sounds terrible. Having to carry shingles up and down ladders, doing clean off. In the heat. Yeah, awful. I mean, awful, awful, awful for all day long. And you're a clean-off and clean-up crew at first,

so you're tearing shingles off, and then you have to go down and pick them all up. Terrible. And I worked maintenance on a golf course. I worked in a marina, having to fix boats, having to move boats. Ugh. Yeah, feel bad for me, America.

That was Amy's Pile of Stories. For inspiration to reach your goals, join Ben Nempton to get on track to make the seemingly impossible possible. Register for the May 5th event at expresspros.com slash express talks. Attend for a chance to win a career coaching session with me. It's time for the good news.

With lunchbox. Tell me something good. Brad Hurt is a nurse. Yes, he's a male nurse. He's out. Why do you have to say yes, he's a male nurse? There are a lot of male nurses that doesn't need... Interesting.

I'm just saying he's out to... You won't believe it. He's a nurse and he's got a ding-dong. Hey, some people think only women are nurses, but it's not true. So he lives in Minnesota and he's out to lunch and as he's paying his bill, he's walking out of the restaurant when he hears, are there any nurses or doctors in here, a nurse or doctor? And he runs around the corner and there's a baby choking.

He's like, I'm a nurse, yes, I'm a male. No, he didn't say, yes, I'm a male. That is not true. And he gets the baby. Heimlich maneuver, save the baby's life. First time in his 10-year career he's ever used the Heimlich. You know, I gotta prepare for that. Why?

Just doing the Heimlich? No. Are there any doctors here? Oh, God. You know, you hide. And that's when you say, yeah, honorary doctorate. Like, I go, are you real or honorary? Because I'm not real.

And it's also of the arts, right? Doctors are doctors, I say. They just say, are there any doctors here? That's what they say. They don't say if there's any honorary doctorate. Yeah, they're not like... You're going to waste time by describing and explaining who you are. They're like, he's dying.

We need some. Quick, are there any doctors? I jump up, well, let me explain to you what happened, right? You give him your credentials and everything. Good for him. What's his name again, Lutchbark? His name is Brad Burt. And he is a male nurse. Just a nurse, yes. Oh, yeah, just a nurse. He's a nurse, not a male. Yeah. There you go. That is what it's all about. That was Tell Me Something Good. All right, if you have ever dealt with a traditional home security company, you know the drill. Expensive monthly fees, contracts that lock you in for years, and waiting around for a technician to set everything up. It's a lot. Well, now they're SimplySafe. They have completely

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Simplysafe.com slash bones. That's half off at simplysafe.com slash bones. There's no safe, like Simply Safe. A better help ad. Financial stress affects the majority of Americans, often causing anxiety, sleep disruption, and even depression. It's also one of the leading sources of conflict for couples. When money feels uncertain, it can weigh on your thoughts, your relationships, and your sense of stability,

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owning a home comes with a lot of things nobody really prepares you for including yard care sunday is a company trying to make that part easier they start with a soil test and climate data to build a yard plant tailor to where you live then ship everything directly to your door no guesswork no dragging bags of fertilizer and instead of harsh chemicals sunday uses simple nutrient dense ingredients like seaweed molasses and iron everything hooks up to a hose which honestly sounds like my speed. If your yard feels more stressful than satisfying, Sunday's approach makes a lot of sense. Go to get sunday.com to get your free custom yard analysis. That's get sunday.com. We had so much fun this year that the top shelf country cruise is back for a second sailing in

2027. It was awesome. Eddie and I had so much fun playing a raging idiot show. Heck, we did two shows on board. Let's do it again. We're back March 2027 aboard the luxurious Celebrity Summit. departing from Tampa, heading to beautiful destinations, Key West, Bimini, and Cozumel. Country superstar Riley Green will also be performing live on board, along with Chris Young, Lauren Elena, and Randy Houser. It's all brought to you by Signature Cruise Experiences, the Gold Standard and Charter Cruises since 2001. Open booking is live, and you can join us for more shows on board. Reserve any available state room online at top shelfcountrycruise.com.

or you can give the signature cruise experiences office a call at 888-381-4420. These spots are going fast. Book now, top shelfcountrycruise.com or 888-381-4420. This is an I-Heart podcast. Guaranteed human.