The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - A Man's Dolls (feat. Andy Fiori & Greg Stone)

Episode Date: March 13, 2024

Comic Greg Stone collects, creates, and sells men's dolls. Merc-face Andy Fiori returns to the Bonfire family.

I'm Bobby Kelly and it's Big J. O'Kersen. We're actually a full radio show on Serious XM, not just a podcast. For full episodes of The Bonfire, you can listen on the Serious XM app. Go to seriousxm.com slash bonfire for a special offer. And now, The Bonfire with Big J. O'Kersen and Robert Kelly. Robert Kelly. That's right, it's the Jewish Elvis everybody, Neil Diamond coming to you with Brother Love's Travel and Salvation show right here on your home of Grandpa Rock. I like Pocky Pine. Pocky Pine pipe, remember that song?

Pocky Pine, Pocky Pine, Pocky get by what's the do you remember what's the name of the David Spade movie with arty lang where are the languages at tiki roberts where he yeah he sings this song see I didn't have a party he like lip-syncs this song half the valley shakes it we is the one with the closers We got Greg Stone in studio

He's got a brand new special Nobody Presents Greg Stone is streaming right now Suck on that Lewis J Gomez On YouTube YouTube right now God damn nobody presents I should have written my next special called Lewis J Gomez presents J. O'Crossin with Lewis having no part Or just call it Louis J Gomez presents

He was my new special to Louis J Gomez presents you put him on in the credits all him directed by Best boy yeah, you put written by Thank You Lewis for all the overtime man hours you put into this. Nobody presents streaming right now on YouTube, everybody. It is the Great Greg Stone. Thanks for joining us, buddy. Oh, thanks for having me, buddy. How's it going?

Great day. What a great day. Maybe Fiori's home. That's the story of Boiser here. Yeah. Oh, yeah, Jacob also lives in the story here. You would know, because he only scurries from, he zip lines from his house to his laundromat. Basically. Do you guys know the Astoria, the little chores

he would, Jacob would have me run when he would be in Florida? Like when you're a fucking apartment building burned down? You have to run out and kick cats in the neighborhood? There's another. That was an exceptional search I'm starting. Okay, there was one. I do appreciate it.

You had to get, you had to get one. Murder cats outside of my house. I don't want to fish no if you see a cat make sure you kick it in the ribs It's killing all the time a Apartment flooded in your building and you made me go check Because I trust you and you did it. Yeah, but that was kind of unnecessary I had to go get no, I was older I had to get soda was away I had to get I had to get their spare keys from DeVito, who lived next door in Vecchione,

to go into Soda's bedroom, get the keys, go all the way over to your, I mean that was a lot. I was told from the Super, you have to do this. Well, it was bone dry. It was bone dry. He had to do it? I don't know if he had to do it. I did it because it could have been water damage

and I wasn't anywhere near, I wasn't home. funny how you're always gone when these natural calamities happen. Yeah What are you worried about the bodies in the basement? Yeah a bird a fire? flooding Jacobs know where to be found Andy get over to my apartment. There's a flood destroy my laptops Make sure there's a lot of floating bucket downstairs. Do me a favor, destroy my hard drive. Clear the history. There's a book with a swastika on it, and I think if you pull that, it opens a secret door. I told you that. I mean, I have the book, Greg, The Rise and Fall of the Third

Reich, and it's gigantic swastika on the spot. Sure, got a gabbit. I think I have the book Greg the rise and fall the third rike and it's gigantic swastika on the spot. Sure, gotta gab it. I think I got it. When they broke it. Greg must read. Oh, that's good. That's required summer reading. You didn't have to get a tattoo of it on your back. I mean the fire department had to break the door down when the apartment across from me caught fire and they all saw my swastika book. Yeah.

It's hard to explain. I mean, I wasn't there. Yeah, they just held you back in the apartment. It was signed. I mean, if a fireman goes, he goes, oh, he goes, I read the first half of that book. It's pretty great. Jesus.

I don't like it on a happy ending. They're gonna fall? I'm all about the rise. They don't like to tear down. I stopped in fall? I'm all about the rise, they don't like to tear down. I stopped in the middle. I'm like right when they peak. He goes, and that there was never a better day for the Nazis, he goes, I'm just gonna fucking put a,

I'm just gonna put a little note card in there and we'll come back to this one day. I'm gonna dog ear this. I'll be back, I'll be back. Don't worry, rise and fall, the third rike. How you doing, Greg? Man, I'm great. Yeah How's the the kids they're good? I mean I'm tired. I was gonna say

I'm here. I'm like man three great people who be very funny. I Every now and again, I'll tap it ago. That's a great one Jay Bobby nailed it again. This I'm on break right now from my children. Yeah, you have a yeah, Greg You have one of the most, to Christine especially, classic lines on bonfire. I'm familiar with the subject was exactly. Talking about Michael Jackson. Oh yeah, Michael Jackson,

definitely having sex with children. And you said, well, two are. You said we allow our king's certain amenities. We allow our king's certain amenities. We allow our king's certain amenities. Step on it. I think we're probably on time. We allow our king's certain amenities. That comes up in my house a lot.

It should be a t-shirt at Skankfest. Yes. We allow our king's certain amenities. I'm missing Skankfest because it's my kid's birthday. Why take the kid? I should. Yeah. We could do mushrooms together.

Wait, which one though? The one that's turned three? The one that's turned three. Oh, bring them. Bring them. He's not going to remember any of this. I know. You'll be the first to know. I'm going to be the first to know. I should yeah, we could do mushrooms together Which one though the one is turning three the one is turn three. Oh bring them He's not gonna remember any of this. I know you'll be the coolest dad Yeah, man, do you think that child is that trans woman face fucking Joe the Rosa?

He's happy. He's happy, Greg. He likes what he's seeing. Get a kick out of it. Nothing better than a baby being heavy at Joe's smaller sort of a pretty chick. Did you have to get rid of your... Action figures? Yeah. I had to put them in the storage space.

Yeah, you had to put them in the right... And I rotate them out, and I have a little table in the storage space that my wife says, why'd them in the right? And I rotate them out, and I have a little table in the storage space that my wife says, why'd you fall to the table? I go, no, because that's where I go, and I sit, and I take one out, and I look at it, and I go, how you doing today, Luke Cage? Go over there.

How are you Superman? You all right? And I put him back. Are these packaged? No! He makes them. Playable. He makes them.

He heavily played with. Uh-uh. No, I have some in the package. Well, no, I ask you that because I will say this all the time. I it's a sigh if I was on a Desert island right now, and you gave me 15 of my old GI Joe's I think I could have fun again. Yeah, I think I can play your man I Joe's yeah my guys Let me tell you don't you don't need 15 you need two or three anything more than that

It's too you're start writing characters stories for everyone you get overwhelmed Understand I don't get overwhelmed quite the opposite. That's what I take to I've said on the show a bunch But one of my favorite I had a road pig. He was a dreadknock. I don't that tell what you talking to He had a gender block a cylinder block No, he was right now if you see this guy you'll realize why he was a young Jay's hero, and he would have to go get Jayde the Pink Ninja from G.I. Joe. She was at a party that she went to without him against, he didn't want that, but she went anyway, and then the guys started getting a little rougher at the party, and then he

had to go solve that to the song, I'll Be There For You by Bon Jovi. That's hilarious. I play those kind of stories. I like that story. He had to go to a party and he would kick all the asses of the guys to the party. His name is Road Pig. I made a custom Road Pig. Doesn't it sound like a fact or you fuck on the road?

Well, Jay, he makes. I've always loved Road Pig. He makes his own. I made a Road Pig. He makes his own. He doesn't buy them. He makes them. I do buy a road pig. He makes his own. He doesn't buy them. He makes them.

I do buy them. Like the movie Poor Things? You made your own road pig? They don't make action figures fast enough for me. So I'm like, you don't have a road pig? They really don't. Stand down. I got you.

But I think I could, I remember when I stopped playing with my guys, I got a new, I came back after a few months of not trying actively not to. And then I went and got two GI Joes. It was a new Storm Shadow and a new Quick Kick, which is good, two karate guys with swords and shit. Then that was the year they changed, everything wasn't free moving anymore. It was if you, one arm went up, the other went down.

They changed it and made it more blocky. They gave the Ninjas some action features, not a fan. It wasn't good. It took away all of the, we've learned this word before. Articulation? Articulation. Yeah, bro. I feel like we're really just sliding right over this.

Do you have a mold? How do you make your own? A mold? Well, I take other figures and then you put them in hot water until they get hot, and then you could pull all the parts apart. It's a real Dr. Moreau island over there. And then you put them back on, and then you sand them, and then you paint them, and then you grab heads, and you just wash the heads.

And there's a woman who let him come in her. Yeah, twice. Twice. I asked this question, maybe I'm being stupid now, and part of a full-room prank, but you do actually make your own figures. Yeah, I was wondering what you kept like just ignoring that part. Yeah, you kept ignoring it. And I'm being stupid now, I'm part of a full room prank, but you do actually make your own figures. Yeah, I was wondering what you kept like just ignoring that part. Yeah, you kept ignoring it.

And I'm like, we can talk about this. He makes his own. I made a road pig. I didn't know this would be true. I keep saying it. I want you to tell me you're proud of it. I'm very proud of you. I didn't know this was a thing.

It's a thing. Yeah. So you sit at home, do you have one of those, the things you pulled down with the magnifying glass? It's too heavy. I guess go raw. We tried. Yeah, but you paint you paint them. Yeah. Yeah. I haven't done it since the kids come Oh boy, I haven't done it since the kids came because But yeah, that was that got when I was broke broke. I used to sell them on eBay. Yeah Also when your kids come you should stop playing with toys also

You're definitely too old then. He made me purchase something over COVID. That was a scam I was running, yeah. Yeah, he was a hair. I hit my limit. Well, I failed at it. Remember, I never got it. Oh yeah, and then I think I lost $250.

I paid you back. Yeah, they tracked. What is it? No, this was also, which I get mad at him too. He goes, yeah, well, you know, this is the way I plan for my future. These are investments for me. I never said that.

These toys. I know you think I've said that, but that's, I need to, if we're doing a bid, I can't, yes, Anne this. Because I want people to think, these are not investments. Yes, Andy. My toys are for the investment of my child's fun.

Or what did I cloud that up? No, I'm not like, I don't buy them so I could sell them later. You should. Um. Because you don't buy them so I could sell them later. You should Should wait a long time Yeah, I get not opening them so if you try we'll play with them eventually, but are you making? New excuse you made a road pig. I made a road pig, but So didn't Jay what parts of what not you Christine road pig? I'm happy. Um, the head was this guy

I don't know if you'd know nuke he was he fought Captain America Okay, so he's like a big old fucking head and then the body was this it was a century I don't I'm telling you this you get it. Why I keep talking. You don't need to I'm like Interested in this big yellow. He was a thing and, and then I did make the cinder block out of clay. Yeah, and then they'll- I didn't know you were this artistic. I'm not, it's just- Would you say autistic? I have to see these things, because I'm picturing fantastic looking things.

They'll take it down five, take it down five. I know people, that is big money in that, man. I watch, for some reason to my algorithm is hit One of the things they'll show me is someone putting together Do you find satisfying how they send collectibles in pieces? So it's like a Joker thing and it's like a big platform and then the throne and then he's sitting Yes, like this and he's holding the cards like you put the hands those those it's minutes to put together I mean it's already done, but like putting it together looks very satisfying.

Yeah. Like putting the cards in the Joker's hand looks pretty neat. But those are worth money. Like I have a. Not long term. I have a, shit, what was that movie that Mark Wahlberg was in? Max Payne.

Max Payne. I have a Max Payne doll in the box that I believe is worth money. Nope. I know, I don't know. Can you look at up Christine Max? Sure. I guarantee it's worth it.

I still have a 1984 Mario Lemieux rookie card, like an OP, like the full set. That was my thing. No collectibles. I also have a spoon. Oh. Do you have a spoon? Like a spoon? Yeah.

Do you have a spoon? That's what I played with when I was a kid They can I've hit and I have my brother Yeah, no, no, I get it. I don't Deadpool signed by Ryan Reynolds that's gotta be worth money, right the character. Yeah, the doll which do you call them dolls? They're not dolls and that's why I'm having a hard time talking right now. I have a little random coming I'm just gonna keep asking you I have a little Randall Cunningham starting lineup. What's that worth? Should I melt him down and build him into somebody else?

So I got a $400 Ninja Turtle set coming this week that I bought before my kid was born and definitely now I'm like well this thing's gonna go This thing's getting sold immediately like you can't have this. I can't have this around the house. How much can you sell for? Well it sells so I bought it for half because I do these reviews, so I get a discount, and I've never done a review. But I love them. I'm not even gonna remember myself.

When you get contact them, you pull, I'm gonna review it. I do that with tech, like headphones. I did it once, and they just always, I have a discount that I continually get. Oh, that's great. And then I put them on, whatever. So I got it for half off, so I could sell it for retail,

and then I'll make money, but I do think this set's gonna go up pretty fast how much you think you may go for it well definitely without even without anything I'll make 200 bucks off it if I sell for retail that's 200 bucks but I could probably make like but it might be like 600 bucks and I mean just come to my house and mailed somewhere else can you tell them about the drug deal kind of thing that went down oh yeah oh my god yes get on the so I have to because it's live yeah that's a thing about when you arrested for child I said drug deal or should we clear that like daddy will tell drug deal

paints the picture of the exchange it obviously wasn't a drug deal take it after you killed that hooker if it did could we talk about it hey remember I had to meet it so you know I trade action figures, remember? I had to meet him, so I trade action figures a lot. So I had to meet a guy. So I- Like outside, you have to meet him in person? I got on the seven train, I went to the stop, met Stadium, met him at the train stop.

I see this guy, I go, oh, that's the guy, whatever. He was like a, all of his pictures was of the woman from Evanescence, so I thought I was meeting a beautiful woman, but it was it was just some little surely you didn't I didn't realize That was her I thought that was I didn't really thought that was the lady showing up to me Yeah, I was like wow It's gonna be a two a two for you know Julia Robbie showed up with a doll Well by the way, how do you think he felt when you showed up when you were a not rapable boy? Merchant Marine Wow when you showed up when you were a not rapable boy. How do you think you felt when you showed up? You were like a merchant marine.

Wow, what a Pina Colada song situation. So I meet this guy, I go, all right, real quick, he gives me this bag, I put the bag in my thing and I immediately walked away and I get on the train and this guy in a denim jacket walks up to me and I'm like this is this can't be this can't be happening right and he goes two denim jackets on this train he goes uh what's in the bag buddy which I don't even know if that's legal buddy yeah and I was like uh the only time buddy's aggressive oh yeah then he goes this he had a badge so he's undercover cop I I'm sorry, I should have said that.

Did you have to say what I think you had to say? I went, you wanna take a look? I was so on board, like, yeah, man, search my bag. This is gonna be great. He opens my bag and he goes, what the fuck is that? I went, that is a mint on card Dr. Octopus Marvel Legends from 2007. What were you looking for?

And then he says, get the fuck out of here and made me sit on the other side of the train. Not even like, he just was mad at me and told me to go sit somewhere else. Yeah, because he saw a man who thought he had a kilo of coke and he had an action figure. Yes. But they turned to ogre.

He's like, I hate nerds. But it has bendable wires. This tentacles move. That's crazy. That's not even the story I was thinking of. Really? The one where you met the guy in his car. And you had to bend his front seat. How are you making money? What's going on? What are you standing outside in a dress?

Hey, Daddy. That one, he actually called me again. You just come and watch me. Hey, Daddy, around the world for a Captain America. This one was serious though, because this was a Joker figure I bought for $45 that I sold it for $800 and the guy was coming to pick it up at the coffee shop and I went oh like he's just gonna steal it and hit me in the head with something right so I also so I had this I had the thing he pulls up in like a Maserati and he was like get in and I was like

What you did? I'm too passive. So it's like, all right. This is how I die. That's horny Maserati you got it. He gave me the money Accounted it, but I also because I was selling it for I was selling this figure for an insane amount of money I felt you're doing something illegal. I just felt, so I gave him like 30 comic book, like straight paperbacks that I had in my house. I just get them for free. So I was like, hey man, I brought these for you too,

as like a thing. And he went, I don't want this fucking shit. And he threw it out the window and drove away. Jesus. Yeah, he was like a reseller. So he wasn't a guy, he wasn't in it for the love of the game. You know, he doesn't pose them like I do. He was in it, I think you'd be a hot kid and you showed up and you weren't you know

It was hard to sell this one because my boys one day we're gonna Every one of these was a guy trying to fuck these you think that these days like later on in life You'll be able to sell all these for your kids. Are you gonna give it? What if your kids not into it? What if your kids like dude, I don't play with dolls? Yeah, I don't think you've seen this out. Don't you say that? Sorry, action figures. Bobby didn't grow up in the time of dolls for boys.

I mean, it's the same when your kid goes, when you went to my ice cream and he goes, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,'ll bury me with them. No, the thing is, it doesn't even matter if they make money, is I have so many now that even selling them for a little bit

is an insane amount of money. What's the most expensive thing you have? What? Wait, I'm sorry, we have two questions. You answer his question. 42. And what's the most expensive thing you have? Well, probably, I sold most of the really expensive stuff.

I don't like to have too much expensive stuff because then it starts to own you, you start worrying about it, and then it's like what the fuck, then it goes down in price. So as soon as they hit like two or 300 bucks, I'm like this is gone, I don't fucking need. But you have a lot of those.

Also, when are you not home and most vulnerable? What's your address? Yeah, yeah, well they're all in my storage space. That's the thing now. So you don't have like one that's worth like five grand? Um, no, no, no. I just have a lot. Does that exist? Well, I mean, old school, I don't collect old stuff.

I only collect stuff that's being made currently. But right in your house, you have the golden treasure of... Yeah, I keep it right under my kids pet... Did you, while I was asking your age, because like, again, I don't know how... I mean, you know, obviously six years apart, but I mean, how far apart on like toys were, but if you, like what you're doing sounds so much to me.

How much I loved before I got out of playing with action figures, the GI Joe, you could take the screw out of the back and Frankenstein and combination you wanted. It was a great thing. Girl legs, road pig body, snake eyes head, a mask coming out of nowhere off of a shirtless body. I loved it.

I never played with him. I never had a hat. If you got a small screwdriver, sometimes you'd panic and just use a regular screwdriver and then you strip the whole fucking thing. But you get a small screwdriver. Sometimes you panic. Well, you wanted to do it really bad.

If you couldn't find a big, you would just dig into that hole and it just stripped it. It fucked it all up. But if you get a small screw driver. Well, you wanted to do it really bad. If you couldn't find a big, you would just dig into that hole and it just stripped it, it fucked it all up. But if you get a small screwdriver, you could take them apart and every part of it was interchangeable to other parts. He meant I had, I had read the green army figures. Like the whole bucket of army Joe. You can do a whole war with that. Army Pete had some green figures, but I don't know what to do with them after a while.

I was like, okay, this guy's down. This guy's on his knee. This guy's laying down. This guy has a bazooka. And, uh, all right, that's what the war would look like, I guess. Yeah. The grenade fella. Bobby, is this what you have?

Um, no. Bobby, you just have an action figure of a handsome guy. Is it? He goes, I have a John Hamm A young Huey Lewis figure I have a John Qsac with the radio over his head. Okay. Okay now we're talking I do want to say though I have an alf Alpha be worth a lot of money. That was great. I'm very like I used to tell people I don't play I don't really play I don't sit down and go I don't really really do that. But I'll look at them and be like, how are you doing on the go?

You are saying really do that though. I don't really do it. You do. I kind of do it. I kind of do it. I don't bring them a bath. But I will like, let them go. Dude.

My GI Joe's in the bath. I added a whole new element of gas. Penis gun, penis gun. Like the water stuff. The big penis cannon. There's definitely 100%. My penis cannon. I don't remember this ever, but I just

know for sure that there was a time where my wiener got hard in a bathtub and I definitely had my GI Joe like hugging He was climbing a tree He sits on the balls and he shoots the cannon No, this wasn't sitting on the balls. I made mine in Crippet like he was a logger Like he was doing a lumberjack contest I haven't climbed it, but it was a very short tree. It was more of like a fern.

We're a new world. He climbed it quick. A new world record. Not much of a view from up here. We're barely breaching water over here. Yeah. Down periscope. And again, like, you know, Soda has those jokes that I love where it's like he was

overlapped smoking and playing with those kind of things. I didn't have smoking, but I was definitely playing with G.I. Joe's and my wiener in a tub while listening to Dice Rules on a fucking stereo. Listening to Dice Clay. I was listening to Dice, and I'll tell you, one thing was happening too young or too old, I was listening to Dice Clay too young for sure.

I mean, it does have those limericks, it's kind of childlike. I loved it, I thought it was all hilarious, but it didn't matter, I just, the idea of listening to something so dirty while you're in tubby time that I cared about my bubbles. Dude. I was at hockey camp and some kid had,

we crowded around the dice tape because we'd never heard anything like it before. We were that with Jerky Boys. Yes, Jerky Boys did. Jerky Boys played in the driveway on someone's cassette player thing. That first Adam Sandler album. They don't hold up though.

Jerky Boys, they don't. I don't know. I just let them do. Some of them don't some of them don't I thought I thought every single thing they did was funny back Then it was to the whole just laugh and now I've listened to him recently Livro lips. I was making life. Why because you could do better now But as an oldie it was no one was really doing that but pranks have evolved. You know, they just were the beginning That was the beginning of that. Yeah, now you just let your friend on fire. Yeah. Go up to a black eye and put a barrel on his head,

his home depot and smash it and go, what, huh? Yeah, now there's the fucking home invasion pranks where the dude actually fought the kid. That's crazy. He knew that must have was gonna happen eventually. Yeah, they do them at the gym, like a guy will go up to a huge guy at the gym and just start fucking with him and then take a beating

and then go, camera, there's a camera, there's a camera. What about the guy who, he goes up to criminals, like on stoopes in the bad neighborhood and it'll just be like, yo homie, you want what's up? Oh God. What you doing man, you juicing, you juicing, but what, and this guy definitely has a gun. Yeah.

No but it's the thing where he has to take a, they play on words, right? And then he goes, no, he has a juice. they go, no, you want he has a juice. He goes, no, you want juice? I got juice. And the guy is like, I'll fucking kill you. He does not even get it. The one time he got chased in the guy had a gun fall out of his waistline.

Yeah. It was like, really scary. Yeah, it's I don't get that at all. No, but Jerky, but one, Jerky was was killed by one thing and one thing only. Caller ID. Yeah. Oh, right. That brought the whole thing down. But now I will listen to it. Me and Fenoya were weirdly put a couple on this week

and we were laughing again. I mean, Kissel was like, oh, shut up, I'm gonna throw you a bait. And the fucking, the Hucklebuck, fantastic one always. I never liked the Indian guy. The insulation guy. The Indian guy? The insulation one, but that's Johnny Brennan.

Insulation dude. He's like, me, I don't give, you don't need all those shit breathers or nothing. Me, I fucking eat this shit. I put't give you don't need all those shit breathers or nothing me I fucking eat this shit. I put mustard on it shit that insulation It's funny it holds up some of them not all of them not all the only one I really like is the vcr repair man, but it wasn't the jerky boys. It was the guy that's not the jerky boys Yeah, it was a guy. They were vcr a vcr our motherfucka don't run stop saying motherfucka sir

I didn't say motherfucker one motherfucking time Oh my god, sorry. I got a story. Good. It just hit. We need you to we need you to talk I So I have a puppets for my kids. Oh Jesus and The kids I do I do it with I do it with them and so we were a nightmare of a childhood this sounds We could possibly be good or bad. Yeah, where's dad? He's a puppet time. Is that the storage unit? Building his puppets with his loop Sounds like man admit those kids came I was like I'm getting everybody puppets

So I get this fucking pop I got these two puppets. I got one Marvin. He's got glasses and nerd. He's just a Ray Romano voice. And the other one is I just put in a Ditas jacket on him because my son had a little Ditas jacket. And that's Rick, you know. So I, whatever, I'm at the park with the kids.

And I was like, I had the puppets and I was like, oh, fucking, I'll do puppets. Cause everyone's coming. So I'll do puppets, right? So I bring the puppet. Now he's like, he's like, hey, hey, hey, everyone's doing, you know, I'm having a good time, you know.

Having a good time. And I go pull out Rick. And I don't know, I just pull Rick out. And I'm like, what is Rick? I'm like, well now he's like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey Greg and dad Greg that's hilarious this guy came out immediately I know I don't know why I'm scared you motherfucker they were like black man but I mean I can't do this I know you guys and girls are yucky but way to them tithes come in I bet they won't be yucky no more am I right DJ hit that shit I'm sorry I'm making Rick start dancing I get on the swings I can swing off a jump I Swings I can swing off a jump. He said Rick starts humping a stool

Yeah, and they immediately all got up and I was like, oh my god, I'm sorry and they're like, it's okay It's fine. I'm like my comedy brain switch like you just fucking cursed in front of all of these kids Real quick a sign to tell everybody that you were comedian also You're sorry guys. I'm professional comedian and I can't turn it off. You guys like more of that, I'll be at the... Could you just say it's not me, it's the puppet? It's him, it's Rick. Rick's got problems. Rick's got problems.

You should think she's been like, Rick, sorry. Come on, man. Give me a kiss, Rick. So fuck you and fuck these kids. Rick! Richard! That redheaded bitch got one tip bigger than the other. DJ, hit it! Oh, yeah, I'm gonna...

Also, if you ever want to know how to do a Bernie Mac impression, I can teach everyone. You take it as much air as you can, breathe it all out, and right before you're about to pass out So say that's when you start talking I try you say Wow You're gonna take a dump I Actually did you shit my pants.

Okay, that's good. I'll tell you boy, you're gonna get your last whooped. I can't do Rick's voice. And I'm Italian. What'd you say? I'm trying to do Rick's voice. I just, I lost it. How you doing?

How you guys doing? Hey, yeah, it's fucking, hey, he's fucking Rick. And I went, oh right. I said it's fucking Rick. I went, hey, it's fucking Rick. And they went, what are you doing? And they got up and I went, oh, I'm sorry. It's just, it's fucking Rick, man. You crazy. Don't get me, it's fucking Rick. I went, hey, it's fucking Rick. And they went, what are you doing? And they got up and I went, oh, I'm sorry. It's just, it's fucking Rick, man.

He's crazy. Don't get me, it's fucking Rick. It's fucking Rick. Every time I talked to him before we came in, I said, can you keep it cool? There's kids. Rick says, maybe don't play blue tonight. Yeah. Rick says, you don't come to my playhouse and tell me what to say.

Okay. This is my art. Nobody makes money under Elmo. We made money in the big bird. I just went a little fucking taste. I actually went to Sesame Street with Max. I had a friend of mine who worked there and they took the real Sesame place. It's in Queens. Sesame place. No Sesame Street. Oh really? Yeah, don't correct me. No, you're talking about the shit No, it was real thing. It's a silver cup. You can yeah, you can it's over near there

You can go to Sesame Street HBO bought it and they make him over in Queens So I knew somebody who worked there and they let me come in and it was crazy. Like he would, I have a picture of Max in Oscar's Barrel. Wow. They, he actually saw an episode in the little store with Elmo being shot. Cookie Monster came out. Oh, that shot? Yeah, you didn't know the big cliffhanger? Who shot Elmo?

Season five. Did they? Who cliffhanger who shot Elmo season five who shot Elmo who shot Elmo second way to who shot J.R. it was both of them Patrick Duffy the saddest thing in the world was is they had snuff a lot of because a big bird just in nets pulled up on the ceiling oh god all hanging hanging all ganglion. I was gonna think of it They were like you can't take a picture of that You can't take a picture of that a little children bird. They got me strapped in like veal bird They're gonna make snuff off because I thought that I didn't think you could go over there. Yeah, I have a friend of Bobby knows a guy

Oh, yeah, it was pretty well cookie max had a cookie from the craft services table yeah and the cookie monster whoever that was cookie and he came come running out of Bobby Max ran cry Bobby knows uh you know the sigmes twins monsters say the word Bobby knows the first half of the words by twins monster you ever see it when they go, kuh. Oh, that guy. King. Kuh. King. Cooking. Direct rip off from Electric Company. Totally. Totally.

Absolutely. They ripped it off. I don't watch Electric Company. I'm younger than you guys. Electric Company. Remember? I don't know why I remember because I'm younger than everybody.

It was a silhouette. But it was, yeah, it was like, buh, spa, well that was a bad one. What? The reason why I didn't do it, cause I couldn't think of one either. Bon, fire. No, no, no, let's go back to Buzz Ball.

Why? Who are you to fucking pronunciation, fucking King over here? Wow, what a deflection, that was a hard deflection. I was saying how you said baseball. I didn't even say baseball, don't throw me at the buzzer. Oh, you were saying Vizball, he was doing in Spanish. Yeah, yeah, Vizball. I was saying how you said baseball. I didn't even say baseball. Don't throw me at the buzzer. Oh, you were saying Vizball.

He was doing it in Spanish. Yeah, yeah. Vizball. Ball. Does this... Ball. Ball. Ball.

Ball. When I first had my... That's an electric factory, though, yes. When I first had my kid, I heard a song. Does this bring... I mean, I'm just gonna do it. Does it bring back memories? One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine,

ten, eleven, twelve. Electric company. Electric company, I mean. So they played that on Sesame Street. They stole it. So I bet you they are working in cahoots. That had the pinball going up ramps and shit also as well. The first episode of Electric Company,

the pilot is creepy. Yeah? Yeah, just some guy goes, here kids, come on up to my house. And this guy brings these kids up to his house. To the electric company? To his apartment. Yeah. Dude, it's very creepy. I think I'm gonna fix that. Watch the pilot episode of the electric company.

It's kind of, they had to make it with some adjustments on the next episode. Sure. Yeah. Not only did it take me back, this song, I will tell you that I used this in reference when I tell a story to this day when I talk about me and Metzger starting off in the black circuit and that's why I went to Big J very quickly because the last name the black circuit is a different kids show but you have you have puppets for that too but I would always you when I would describe how they said Kurt's name because Kurt

was just going to Kurt Metzger and I just went to Big J quick. I'm like, Big J's fine. Let's just say that and I'll go up there and we'll get messed up at all. And Kurt's name would get fucked up all the time. And then sometimes when they would not just even take a shot at it, they would stretch Kurt's first name out to take the place of where names would be. And I used to say, it sounded like the 12 at the end of, uh, you know,

they go one, two, three, four, at seven, eight, nine, to 11. You know they go, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. So I go, they go, give it up for Kirk. We gotta take a break. We do. We gotta take a break. At least socks. Greg Stone's new special, Nobody Presents.

Greg Stone is streaming now on YouTube. Go check it out. What's your website, Greg? You got a website? I don't update it. Just type in Greg Stone in whatever you type in and I'm pretty sure you'll find me. All right then.

Well. That's a nasty little second update. Andy Fiora is gonna be in Hartford, Connecticut this weekend, the 15th and Saturday, March 16th at City Steam. Never played that club. He heard good things about it. For tickets and all other dates, visit AndyFury.com and follow at AndyFury on Instagram and Big J and me.

We're gonna be doing a big show at the Paramount Theater coming up very shortly. Please buy tickets, please. Next Thursday. I beg you, buy tickets. 21st, 8 p.m., there's only 30 tickets left. I beg nobody to buy tickets 21st APM there's only 30 tickets left. I beg nobody to buy tickets but it would help. I beg no man. Big J is going to be at 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 11 It'll be in Las Vegas and Jacksonville, I left that in Virginia Beach. After that, for tickets and all of the dates, please visit bigjcomedy.com.

Bobby Kelly at Side Splitters this weekend. That's right, the 14th to the 16th. After that, Laugh It Up, the Kipsey, March 22nd and 23rd, Houston, the Comedy Mother ship in Austin, and then San Antonio, Texas. He's all over Tejas. For tickets and all tour dates, go visit robertkellylive.com.

We'll be right back. It's the bonfire. Hey everybody, thanks for listening. That was just a portion of our actual Serious XM radio show. If you want the whole thing, go to SeriousXM.com slash Bonfire for a special offer. That's right. And go to bigjcomedy.com and RobertKelleyLive.com to check out our stand updates coming to a city near you. Clap your hands.