The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Amor Fati (feat. Sean Patton & Yannis Pappas)

Episode Date: June 28, 2022

Sean Patton & Yannis Pappas The Bonfire while Jay is out on Bert Kreischer's Fully Loaded Festival! Sean challenges Shane Gillis to a drinking contest and both Lou's want in on the action. Yannis tells the gang about the change in his hometown Brooklyn, New York over the last 20 years. Stream "The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson & Dan Soder" for 3 months free on the SiruisXM app! Offer Details Apply: www.SiriusXM.com/BonfireFollow us on all social media @TheBonfireXM@DanSoder www.DanSoder.com@BigJayOakerson www.BigJayOakerson.com@SeanPatton www.MeSeanPatton.com@YannisPappas Mom Love - Full Special: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ArlCFemEDvQ

And now back to the bonfire with big J. Ogroson and Dan Soder Wooo! And then maybe we're cracking them during the commercial break. I'm drinking again just because that song was so influential. I want the scorpions to do a cover of this but like how there's an iron beer in Germany. Yeah, so when you spot the sea, is it an iron beer? I see an iron beer gargant. Welcome back to...

Scorpions here with Germany. That's right. Yeah, I Germany. I think the Euro Rock. Jay would have known. He's our music expert. Welcome back to the Bonfire Series XM. Fact of Talk 103. I'm Dan Soder. Big Jay O'Kerson out today. Getting back from the Berk Krasher Tour, the country tour. Yeah.

New country. Sitting in for Jay, we got Sean Patton. Check out his tour dates at me. Sean Patton. And our guest, another old friend and great comic. What am I going to say? I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, New country big country sitting in for Jay. We got Sean patent check out his tour dates at me Sean patent calm and our guest Another old friend and great comic. What are my favorite people in the world? He's got a special on YouTube right now called mom love. Yannis pop is what's up gentlemen

Look in tell you What's on us never been 10? Yannis has been pale plenty of times But now that he's got the chain out, he's coming in nice and crisp. I'm winter very pale and then in summer I'm tricky, I'm Greek I can go tan on you. I can go put a weekend in a second. You could slip right in there, dude. I can't.

And he's coming in with his summer shade on. I'm coming in with his southern shade. And you're coming in with your Jerusalem curl. Dude, it's a little nice humidity. Got me going curly, lechaya. My hair is curly today for some reason it looks like you weren't too pay dude look at that yeah I've what if I moved it yeah what do you saw I'm back

still well not up here I mean all you're starting to get the Woody Allen oh yeah you know I'm gonna have a sunroof for sure yeah sunroof yeah same here I'm gonna have to start. Yeah, you know, I can punch my head right now Oh, yeah, that's when that's when it be hoops you to maybe think about convertin a Judaism just to cover it up I would love it. Yeah, there'd be a perfect fix. Yeah, it is it's a good fix I'd be like guys listen to things changed in my life All of a sudden now I've got currently hair in the front you have a Jewish bill already well thank you you know I'm saying yeah are we

all built are we all built like rabbis would you just typically unathletic yes yeah my body's a bag of munch it's uh I know I was actually the most athletic one in my family. Hey funny you said I played off This I was the sports off they called me the Jewish Steve curve I was the one that could throw a ball that didn't say I look like a woman I was top 20 in my synagogue. I could ball out. I was loving young Jews kids super good at basketball ball out. I was loving young Jews get you super good at basketball. Yeah, because you're like, there's a ceiling guy. Yeah, there's a, yeah, there's a ceiling. And they play with the, they play with the Yamaha. I break your ankles. I don't give them back. Yeah. Just getting balled on by a dude in a Yamaha. I was saying one of those round,

like, cake hats. Oh, yeah. One of the, one of the Haseed's. That would be, that would be the one. Do the Haseed ball. That would be, that would be the one. Do the Haseed ball on you and those thick clothes. There was one that used to call him the Jewish Jordan. What? Yeah, it was a guy called the Jewish Jordan. He wouldn't play during the Sabbath. He wouldn't play on Saturdays stuff like,

well that stuff. From New York? Yeah, I mean, yeah. Look him up, look at the Jewish Jordan. Yeah, and there's another one right now who's like leading the, leading the country and scoring in his Jewish, but he plays in like, you know, other, he's like leading the leading the country and scoring and he's Jewish but he plays in like you know that he plays like a Kentucky

is he playing against you know friends who are a little bit better you're not you're talking about the ones that buy the jewelry not sell this yes the ones that appreciate diamond I love it if I was Jewish I'd put all my money into my kid just fucking ballin. Yeah, just does it real. Yeah, Ryan, his name is Ryan Terrell. Ryan Terrell Jewish Jordan, D3 player. So he leads the country and scoring Division three. Chris DeStephano played Division three.

Yeah, it's a white college basketball. Yeah, it's a white college basketball. Yeah, dude. Yeah. Like when you're like a member of Moses name, Jenner Fernet, Gunner Fernet, what was his name? The kid from... Jimer Fernet. Jimer Fernet.

Jimer Fernet. Oh, he's getting the amy-comical. Look at it, you see that? Oh, yeah, dude. When you know that, when you know that, Jacob's not a... Yeah. When you know you're one of the 12 tribesmen,

you know, he's hitting them. I think he's placed for the Yashiva and it's funny because I saw someone about like, is he gonna make the league and I just said it to TV. No. It's like I can answer that question for you. You and every NBA scout. How do you say no in you this?

I got a quick answer to letters. You can't negotiate into this one bug Damn dude, I love that he's ballin with the Yamakon. Yeah, but that is fucking great Watch it is gave you can't tell the difference between this in college intramural game It looks like a good fucking Kansas high school basketball. It's just like two frats Two frats ballin it out damn dude. Yeah, that's pretty Like here goes. Oh, there you go. It's from downtown. Oh Hello Three

He's putting the ball in the soup. Ah, someone better tell him. He just had his bread dipped in honey. And that's a yum-capporte to him, the townman. He's gone to the line for two. He only had enough threes for one quarter, but he didn't laugh the entire season. He's, he, they killed Jesus and they're killing St. Mary's They're really putting St. Mary up on the cross

Oh, he's cruising He might have been from the house of David and from the blood of David, but he's no Savior, but defense is not figured out how to circumcise his three throws Kiss the brisk this game is over All the way from deep down into holy lady hits the three Sad and real as they were serving white fish of this game Because it's having a feast. Let my people go and sink a few more buckets. I'm gonna get in trouble for one of those. Yes Roddo say I hope you all

have a good and happy holiday. He makes the layup like it was the blood of a Christian child. That's the one. Let's just start crossing the line. Start talking politics in the middle of it. I mean, Dave, what's going on with the funding for this place? You grew up in New York City, so you grew up watching basketball was super popular, right? I played it, yeah. And you were just like, you go down the courts, was it terrifying? Because Sean and I grew up in the suburbs. So you knew who was going to be at the park.

New York City, you show up and there's just some guy named like a Oki doke and he's been living in the neighborhood for 20 years He's like a street ball legend and you got to play and they always they would play with jeans on and Smell like weed and they'd be great. Yeah, just fucking Maybe great and I just grew up your name was bird I wonder if it's like a white player per decade like 80s you got called bird 90s. What would you get called? Now stop probably or nine. Mullin. Yeah, maybe Mullin. Mullin was big one. Because he also said yeah, Queens. So you're just like a Chris Mullin. Yeah, Mullin and Durk probably.

Yeah, now it's joke. Yeah, Yo-Kitsch, Dirk. Dude, he plays Fat Sloppy Ball, which I love. Yeah, yeah. I think I even got brought up at Black Comedy shows as Bird a few times. I'm gonna give it up for Bird. I did. That's what I get low, you can call Bird.

Could be the word, you are the opposite. You're Greek. Yeah, you didn't have to look at anything like it. It's just, you know, that was just, they just called Asian people Jackie Chan. Yeah, that was it. You just get one rep, you get one person who's a reference for an entire people.

That's how it goes. It's real simple when I was growing up. You know, it's easier time. Yeah, it was easier when just like, there was nobody divvyed up certain South American countries. It was just like, you're Puerto Rican or you're Mexican. Yeah, you know. Everyone went by a general

location. Yeah, your white or your black. There was a lot of people to put to keep devs on. Yeah, you know, you know, yeah, did I love that your chain out? That's when you cross your leg and you go into the race stuff. Yeah, let's really get to it. Chain out as soon as it comes out, it just changes the whole thing. Let me tell you right now.

It goes in, I go back normal and then it comes out. I'm like, what's going on? I got a deal for you. I'll get you some clams. You got a whole thing. Let me tell you right now. It goes in, I go back to normal, and then it comes out, I'm like, what's going on? I gotta bail for you. I gotta get you some clams. You got a clam guy? You got a guy? I got a clam guy. I got a clam guy to help you.

He's got a long neck, he's got short toe, what do you need? Because it's funny to watch, like, Yannis, I remember one time Yannis was talking about, and I won't say what person he was talking about, but he was like, because we're still friends. But Yannis was talking about how he didn't trust a certain person, right? He's like, my spider senses go off around them.

I don't feel like I've been trusted. And Yannis, at this time, it's like, Yannis is just like a normal, he's just my buddy Yannis or whatever. But this is, when you, when you see him go very New Yorker, is like when he explains why he doesn't trust people and he's like, kind of a stand, growing up in Brooklyn in the 80s. I just got a feeling for people. And he's like, I just, he doesn't trust people and he's like, kind of a stand, growing up in Brooklyn in the 80s.

I just got a feeling for people. And he's like, I don't trust that person. It's totally true. And you were right. It's totally true. You were right. I think this was like 11 years ago, and it took me like five years to be like.

I don't know who it is. I'll tell you off. Not my mom though. Not your mom, because I was right about her too. Oh man, that happened to me with my grandma, and I wasn't expecting it when that heel turn happens and you're like Who's my grandma the whole time my grandma's N. W. Oh, oh my god She got my dad drunk

Yeah, dude, yeah, no you interact with so many people and it was it was it was it's kind of returning to those times now a little bit Well, you just have to be aware on the street street So you're constantly reading people for your own survival. Yeah, was that ever turned off? It's hard to the run New York was on in the past 20 years. Yeah, that L train for in the morning Oh, I mean people on the train three four in the morning without a care in the world Oh, yeah, you wouldn't think of that in the 90s How scary was the train and when you were on I I remember my, I had a friend, a shout out, Jaha Johnson, he lived in Crown Heights, which was in adjacent neighborhood

to Russell Bregg who up in, which is where the Crown Heights were, she chased me down in a robe because I was going to his house. She was just like, because that's how scared she was that I would be in that neighborhood. Your mom was like, you're not going.

You're not going. So it was like, yeah, it was just like, I mean, my dad's car radio back in the day when they stole the car radios. Yeah. His car radio once got stolen. It got stolen total, like maybe 20 plus times. So he, by the end, by like, time 10, he walks in

and it's not even, you're not even like a, emotional about it. You're like, the fucking radio's gone. It's in the, it's a, in the list of things that happen you that day. Jesus. He's like, yeah, I went to work and got the car radio and then I ate it three. Car radio's gone. It's in the list of things that happen you that day. You're like, yeah, I went to work and got to go to the radio and then I ate it three, car radio got stolen. But do you ever talk to people?

Because there's a few guys I want to say, like who I've had that conversation with, who used to live out in Brooklyn or not. Like the ball moved to Astoria, the safe place. Shout out Astoria. But people are like, I got, I got mugged in Brooklyn, I got people were fucking dicks. And you look at them and you're like,

you have to look at you. Yeah. I mean, no offense mugged and broken, I got people were fucking dicks and you look at him, you're like, can't, I mean, look at you. I mean, no offense, like you can't get in. You gotta come in. A couple of our friends are like, you're an easy mark. You're walking around just broadcasting, like I trust everyone. Yeah, you're a nervous, you're a nervous looking guy. I'll late at night.

Yeah, it's just like, come on, just, so check this out. We were getting into the car, like the front door of my house was open. My brother, who's special needs, was sitting on the front stoop while we were getting our jackets ready to get going on. The car radio got stolen in that duration broke the window in like four to six minutes. Just grabbed the car in the middle of the day. My dad was so angry because it was this was like the tenth time it happened. He went to the car. He went to the car in the middle of the day. My dad was so angry because it was this was like the Teenth time it happened. Yeah, he went to the car. He went to the car. Punch the hood and broke his hand So like fed up with that and then from there he had to it was normal back then where you parked in a garage

Like you had a guy drive you to the like when you called for the car. He'd come you'd have to drive that guy back and then Yeah, that's how it was or your car was getting fucking broken it was just getting broken into it was I thought he was saying I was his message to the neighborhood like he breaks his head like go ahead oh do this to myself we are a match well do you want to see crazy you'll bring back the radio by noon tomorrow I mean middle of the day right there we were about to get into it it got it got broken into because they shout out to those thieves Dude, they were good. Yeah, good. It was the fucking insane We're from the car radius and then it was the airbags were big for a while What yeah airbag big one. I don't even know that you can steal airbag

I do steal airbag. There's pop open the we the Baseball back is that open up the the we the wheel and take it or. Open up the wheel and take it, or they open up the front of that glove compartment. How would you know? You're criminal. They know. No, no, no. How would you know your airbag is taking?

Did they put it back together? Yeah, that's what I mean. Just get fucking hot. You just get killed by the steering wheel. That's me like, that was supposed to go off. I don't think they stitched you back up. I don't think they mined if you know. Okay. They're not trying to sneak yeah, they're not cat. They're not tag burglar Let's take some extra time to put it back together

It's like a moment in the wire where they're like let's go back to every That's fucking wild steel and airbag. Who do you sell in airbag? Do you like, yeah, I got a bag of airbags. A whole black market. I don't know who's buying it, but there was a black market for it. They put them in golf carts. And then they sold them all to the jackass production.

That's where they all went when they were blowing shit up. Damn, when did you notice the change? Was it Juliani? It was Juliani. It was Juliani. The broken window policy. Yeah, you know, you can't make omens without breaking a few eggs. Yeah, you can't make omens without violating some silver rice.

Clean up quick or like quick. I remember I got my first felony summons right when he went into office because we used to just sit on like a park park bench and smoke weed. That's pretty cool. Cops came up and they said that was the thing. They were like it's a new era. It's a Giuliani era and it just came. He wrote park bench and smoke weed. That's pretty cool. Cops came up and they said that was the thing. They were like, it's a new era, it's a Giuliani era. And it just came, it wrote me a felony summons. I had to go to court the whole thing. Oh, felony summons. For smoking weed.

Smoking weed. So she's the, some of the quality of life adjustments he made. So like jumping to turn style, smoking weed, loitering, felony. Yeah, they were like, felony summons. They had to go to court. You had to make an appearance

and I could end up being a felony, and be on your record. What did you, when you showed up or you were like, I shut up with my dad. My dad was my lawyer, because that was my first year. I went to college at your freshman, so my dad was a lawyer, but he was not that lawyer. So he just went and he said, he was going,

I remember he goes, we stood up real quick. There's a whole bunch going through. And he goes, you're on her, my client. I was like, why don't you just say your son. Yeah, it's like my client can't do the community service because he's over at American You. And it was just funny here and him call me his client. But at the same time, he's like, also your on her,

I'd like to sue the automatic manufacturer for making a roof too. The roof's too hot, look at it right there. I want to sue this. Also, my client needs to clean his room. And my client was a little rude to his mother this morning. And I want to apologize to a sister for not letting her back for a month. Also, my client called this tie a father's day. So I don't know if my client is worth ultimate representation.

Did it get thrown out? It got expunged. Nice. Yeah. Because you're white. And you're like, take a black dude to me like, you're not a record. Do I have eyes? Yeah. So you, but when you're in the court right there, when you're in the court, yeah, you can clearly say that, you know, you're like, damn

Giuliani. One of these the easy to one of these guys Hey, one of the same damn dude and when you so after that when you get let out and it's expunged Are you like we can't what we in public? No the other guys were like yo man. How do I get you? Loyal You go well for good or low you have you have him come in your mom You guys get his car stereo back. It's got that fixes hand to get his tunes back. Do you know where his airbags are?

And then get you a guy. Can you, can you bring the airbags back? Can you bring the airbags back? He's got a shot of this guy representing you. Quit pro quo. Damn, yeah. That's so, and then you notice. Did change was, yeah, I know,

certainly was, because I went to, I left, I went to I left I went to college I went to school DC and every year I would come back I started noticing my neighborhood Fifth Avenue you remember parks, you know, yeah, fifth Avenue. So fifth Avenue was like not great Sure And then you started to see these little outposts It always starts with like a lesbian bar. They're the Marines agentrification. They go in first starts with like a lesbian bar, the Marines agentrification. They go in first. First thing going there would solve all the bads. Yeah, they get in there first.

The Marines. Yeah, we're actually doing a pretty strong IPA and don't need none of your male bullshit. So we're going to enjoy this ball. We're going to have women's tennis on and we're going to be drinking some stouts. I need you to know. I appreciate you not piping in about the candles. We like candles Yeah, and we're gonna snack on some puss in the back We have a jukebox. It's only as the breeders. Yeah, and we're It's for Rooka salt in the breeders and we're here to suck puss and drink So I don't need you I

It's So I don't mean June. I didn't actually stand for it. It's bus fail. So my name's Sue. Yeah, I'm Sue. Sue, this is Pam, my partner. And this is this is Dikes. And the bar, the first part down there was called Ginger's.

We've seen more hood than a sweatshirt manufacturer. You scared me with your penis energy. I've fingered more content of stenographer It's got a small clean score. So what do we do? We get a party voice? Yes, so they were first in. Yeah, when you start to see a few of those pop up.

And then like a cupcake shop. Yeah, that's down the line a little bit. The Marines got it. Yeah, they got a they're in there for a second. If the lesbians are the Marines, are they like the gays, the Air Force? The gays? They just come in and carpet bomb. They're like the Army, they come in and set up shop.

Yeah, they're the officers that come in late and it's kind of like, it's gonna run, yeah. Status quo. Okay, everything's tonight, everything's ready, yeah. Everything's ready. Bring in the straight. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. The Army's just like the young kids from the suburbs. There's like, yeah, then that's like, that is for a football. Yeah, that's the fleet. That's where you see it when you come in where you're like, I love Biggie. Yeah. I can't believe I'm living in his mom's house for 7,000 a month.

What are we doing for Biggie's birthday? Oh my God, celebrate. I live that young king was taken to early. I don't have before I was born That's weird too. My my fire escape is my terrace, but it's charming. I put plants out there Charming you got smoke a smoke an American spirit and loved it I was misgendered and I was like Brooklyn's tough Maybe I you're growing up and you're like I lost shoes on the way home. Yeah. Yeah

If see if I was always my favorite honest was like I used to get my shoes taken I mean, you know, you're growing up and you're like, I lost shoes on the way home. Yeah, no, yeah. If I was my favorite, yeah, I was like, I used to get my shoes taken. Oh, no, yeah, I one time they took my shoes off, yeah. I remember. Do you think, can I ask you a question? Yeah, as a suburban kid? Sure.

Do you, what's the process of losing shoes? Does it, do they rip them off or do you untie them and then like loosen your tongue and take them off? It was as slow, pro. I mean, these guys were, they're like, you're gonna fucking get them. These guys, you know, the store was open for a little while It wasn't like right before closing They had plenty of time they were peruse and type stuff did they like match their feet up with yours

He asked me what size I was and I tried the I should have said like woman six Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I told him the truth. And he was like, oh, well, that's my size. Look, he did. And he was like, nice Timbo's. I remember I had some Timberle boots on. What happened was I was just walking. The walk from the train around Granham Plaza was always where you were like,

there's a long, like, over. You got a long bro. Yeah, there's a long, like, one, it's one long street. And you're on it, you're kind of alone, the bus would stop there. Oh man, that's like, you hear that bus noise pull off? It's like, it pulls away, you're like,

fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, I don't think there is anything that encapsulates my childhood more than that. Like when you get off a bus or you turn a street corner and your fate is just there. You see it. You can't turn around and walk back. It's too late for that.

So you gotta put on some type of face into like I'm gonna walk through these kids. Did you add crazy? What was your? No, you just tried to add confidence even though you weren't. Yeah, you scared shit. You just kinda knew what was happening. It was like I'm more fatty.

You were just like, I know I'm gonna lose a hat. Yeah, love that. Love that I fake. Dude, if you didn't get your hats stolen, it was a weird, unusual thing. It was disrespectful. It was unusual. Would you, would you.

You were like, that was weird. Didn't get my hat. With that influence, the way you bought hats, where you're like, this is so ugly, no one will steal this. No, wait, I've said this so many times. You once, one of the most brilliant moments of impromptu comedy I've ever seen, at Bar Fora, at your show. Which was in Parksville.

Yeah. You were talking to some dude who reminded you of a guy who stole your hat once and you talked about, then you broke down every MLB hats, probability of being stolen in your neighborhood when you were a kid. Oh, yeah. Yankees.

Obviously, we're the highest. Yankees are the highest. Matt Brooklyn. Matt's Brooklyn. Yeah. Oh, Brooklyn Dodgers. Wow. That was hot for a little while.

What were the lowest Colorado Rockies? Pretty cool, huh? Colorado Rockies. Yeah, he wouldn't get. That'll be low. That'll be low on the totem pole. I had marlins. Marlins, I think you might lose.

The Marlins didn't become a franchise till 93 93 so that was just before Yeah, so you're you're talking about when the braves were in the NL West Yeah, I remember you saying the diamond but the debacks were the lowest probability Probably back yeah those are your back's hats are 96 I think they came in yeah, they came in with the rays Yeah, yeah, you had a year or two grace period for them for them to realize it was a team and that they didn't know before I'm trying to think I'd probably buy like Canadian football team. Oh, you keep that forever Done, you know, I tell my mom. She's like it's hard to find I go. What do you want to keep it? I put me the jet tap. There's good as dead Trish

I want that as house fucking giant tap I'm post as a kid as a kid though I did have two back-to-back Oakland A's hats stolen really right and when I wanted to let my mom refuse to buy me another Oakland it she bought me a Houston rockets at your mom got with it quick I need to get you something this a little colder in the streets I was putting out there so hot I was also just a like a throbbing Was when I was a kid. Oh, I was like 11 12. I wouldn't survive here. I think you could I would absolutely I would I wanted them to be my friends I would have given them every I would have been like you guys want me to give my toys from home I was a throbbing was to you just they were just they'll he's

But Yankees hats were the number one. Oh Yankee number one. A fitted Yankee in New York. Oh dude. Would they just see that and be like, what size is your hair? Yeah. They did. I would take a break because I'm eight. I'm size eight.

You got a big head right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think they were the weather system changes. I'm currently now they would have took it though. Yeah. Big head because they got things you can you got to put the bandana under that. Yeah, I got my basketball. The first thing I got stolen it, he didn't take it though.

The first attempt at a robbery when I was really young was my basketball trophy. I was walking back. We won like a tournament. Oh, and he wanted the trophy. Well, he said just give me the trophy. He was like, he said up the trophy. I remember who's me and my buddy Damien walking. He's like up the trophy. We had just got off the bus me the trophy. He was like he called he set up the trophy. I remember it was me and my buddy Damien walking He's like up the trophy. We had just got off the bus off the van

So I just decided to keep talking to him till we got to an avenue where there was more people and then it was it was over I was like eight What you like he was like eight and I said what are you gonna do with the trophy? He's I'm gonna give it to my girl Shivori that happened Yeah, it's just some eight-year-old girls like thanks. He's on there you go. I was explaining to him I was like you know I was like this isn't the job on the nights. Yeah I was like this is plastic man. It's not you know because they paint it like yeah Like it's gold, but it's plastic.

Eight years old, you breaking it down, and also knowing that you have to buy time to get to the avenue. Yeah. That's crazy. All these suburban kids are just getting abducted, because they say they know their parents. All these suburban kids are like,

your parents sent me and kids are like, yeah. Yeah, or they'll be like, checks out. Hey, man, can I hold that for a second? Sure you can. You know, the classic one in my neighborhood, the suburbs was, let me ride your bike. Yeah. I'll ride that. Yeah, that was good. And then you're like, man, can I hold that for a second? Sure you can. You know, the classic one in my neighborhood, the suburbs was, let me ride your bike. Yeah.

Oh, right there. Oh, that's great. And then he's just gone. And he ain't coming back. See, that was the thing in the suburbs. He had one guy. He had one fucking bully. For me, it was that.

So for us, it was like four years. You would bump into where your friends, and what division they lived in, there was a group of guys. And then as I got older, I just became friends with those guys. Cause it weren't, you know, me and McDaniel were like, well hang on with these guys.

There are friends, but there are also pieces of shit. Did you charm them, is that your way in? Funny, yeah, funny, yeah. Just funny, goofy, and they knew I was a pus, but I was funny. Yeah, yeah. I was gonna, I fought one of them once, and that sucked. And I'm like, you guys do this all the time?

I was like mad at them. I'm like, it That's just a fight walk into polls hump and Adam objects Don't yeah be the fucking dumbass. I would be the then they protect you from other done protect you from other fucking Groups just basic fucking food chain knowledge more talking about laws of the jungle Yeah Yeah, but now it's got to be fucking so much worse with cyber bullying and shit like that Like you get the shit kicked out of you at a bus stop and it's on YouTube and everyone's breaking. There's 500 comments Yeah, where it was like you had to eat that embarrassment, but then no one cared That's what I grew up to realize. Yeah, no, that is gotta be weird when something goes on the internet

It's like forever if you're like knocked out in a street video like you can't get it down It's just up there over Yeah, yeah, you gotta be like it doesn't really I don't look the same anymore One thing if you like crying and being like your punches hurt No, I don't know Did you ever see that one video the guy it was outside of a gas station he was he was like I'm from New York I'm out here by myself and he went and he tried to like fight these two like trucker guys Now but Christine's looking it up and you might find it one guy beat the living hell out of him And then he became a meme for like a year people because he was so knocked out

He was knocked out. He was like trying to get up. He was putting him in yoga studios That's that when they get you like that. He became famous from getting knocked out Like I could recognize him today if I saw him on the street I CTE from that It was so big I can't smell anymore. Yeah, I mean, I don't know how like he's like one eye like most people would probably recognize him I want to know if I know who this guy is someone can find it. It's Christine's looking it up. Yeah, this is it My way to country boys Look how big and burly they are too

Called down all have for New York now. Oh, yeah, I'm by myself Fuck these ladies man Oh, yeah, I'm full of new yo, oh, yeah, I'm by myself. Fuck these niggas, man. Hey, you fucking talk about me. There it goes. Go, that's good. He's like, excuse me, sir.

Would you mind kicking my ass for? Oh, he, I'll you lurch that. Yeah, ah, ah, ah. Ah gets really mad. He's in trouble now. He's in trouble now. You don't want to hear that. He's in trouble now. What's the time now? Oh, you took his back.

He just hit. Hit. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, dude. We'll tweet it out. The bottom fighter has to exam. He's just taking shots to the back of his head. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Meems came from here. Here it is. This really means starting yoga Oh My god dude, you get that knocked out

After you're so loud about it, you have to go into like protection you have to go to witness protection But like they got hide you yeah, yeah, you're like, you might as well be in that camera, but I will never lose a fight. I am the toughest man alive. And the next thing you're like, when you when you have that wake up from a knockout thing, you're like, Mommy is super. It's always like this vulnerable. Is it Christmas tomorrow? You say something incredible? am I in trouble now mommy I ate my vegetables and then I did what the fuck you talking in a second before it's like I'm from New York I'm about to have a self-dame nothing that scares me I fuck up anything mommy come like me yeah and then you just see your guys like oh boy boy, you got you now.

When you hear that, you're fucked. Yeah. At one point, getting his lights shut off, do you think he was just like, damn. He should've been like, oh, maybe I shouldn't have done that because I'm out here by myself. Yeah, I'm out. And there's two of them.

I just realized the being by myself wasn't an advantage. Oh, I thought everyone was cool. You know what's weird about this? I thought it was a positive, and it turns out it's an advantage. I thought everyone was cool. You know what's weird about this? I thought it was a positive and it turns out it's an egg. Okay, if they knocked him out and flipped him over, like we are going to suck your dick now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You kept shouting.

I gotta be shouting. I, you, which my boy, oh yeah, forgot I'm out here by myself. Yes, well, unfortunately, we can't get you to a hotel because no one knows where you're staying. Cause you're out here by yourself. Can I stay, we found you by yourself. And then we saw the video and realized that,

you were pretty proud of it. Yeah. I'm not, dude, I'm usually so nervous when I'm by myself. Yeah, I would like. My high video would have been like this. I'm out here by myself. And I don't want anyone to suck my dick. I am so scared.

I am so scared out here. Oh, black eye and clearly a predominantly white and aggressive neighborhood. I'm out here by myself. He might as well just be screaming. I'm out here, phone room. I'm very vulnerable. I'm vulnerable. I'm vulnerable and alone.

I'm adorable when I get knocked out. I'm looking to make friends. You know what I'm saying? You want to be friends? You ex up and suck. I want cudgles. It's in these three minutes before. I'm like, oh, suck, suck my fucking dick. Oh no. I want cuddles

Oh no Widow baby don't get his juicy You're coming out of a knockout it's not coming out of surgery. Yeah, I have to fuck you're gonna say I would not yet I'm crazy shit that I've said after endoscopies where I'm like Hold me for a second. She's like, why aren't you at the end touching me? You're also one of the few guys who can say that from experience as young as you are getting endoscopies. What are you 60 year old? What are you saying?

I got the curly hair though. I make sure that my tummy is all right. I've been battling acid reflux since 09. Yeah, shit. When I used to drink, because we were talking about drinking before you came in. Yeah, well, you two guys were good at it. I remember one time,

I remember me and Sean, we were drinking in Montreal and the bar closed and he was like, can I get one more? And they were like, a bar is closed. He's like, okay, how do I buy a bottle to take back to the room? And then he just walked back to his room with the bottle of red.

Yeah, yeah. That was a good week, that week of Montrel, because we were there before all the bullshit. Yeah, it was just like us hanging out with Canadians. And I was telling Sean the story about all of us at Cabin Bar on Thursday, and the time I kicked open the door and you were pissing and I threw up and went back to drink. Yeah, yeah, yeah, threw up, yeah, you threw up right behind me. I was pissing bar on Thursday and the time I kicked open the door and you were pissing and I threw up and went back to drink.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, you threw up right behind me. I was pissing at the urinal. You just kind of zoomed in behind me. Yeah, then I went back out. Yeah, I think you did the worm on the floor with no shirt on that night. Don't remember that. Don't remember that, but I can imagine that was a sticky worm. It was a sticky, sticky worm. Mom, the worm is sticky. Yeah, waking up out of my drunk sleep.

I'm like, Don't judge me, just hug me. Dude, waking up, that's what it's like when you black out. When you wake up, it's like coming out of the dark out. You just feel like I'm afraid of everything. The fear of everything. Which by the way, it's been having me recently. Like I've just been waking up afraid.

Just waking up like, yeah, like, is it from the winter? I don't know. Put it wake up. I'm like, yeah. I think part of that is just like the state that's the world. The world is scared too.

Is it just my subconscious being like, dude, just about to go down. Yeah, maybe you just have crazy out there. Some insight, it's a little weird out there right now. I was hoping we were gonna have a fucking summer without right We've had riots for three straight years. You have like wildfires now I just want to be like supreme court if you were gonna do it could you have fucking waited till fall till January Wait till it be fucking it's a little tight out. I mean dude a little cold out how sadistic is that?

I don't know man. They do it during the right month You know it's funny is you know a lot of obviously people Very divisive issue, but ton of people upset and I woke up for my on my birthday was Friday And my mom called me and she's like happy birthday. They were turned raviway On your birthday. I was the call I got to wake up was my mom gone good morning Happy birthday. I'm like thanks. They have a turn That was the call I got to wake up was my mom gone good morning happy birthday I'm like thanks they ever turn Revy West

She might as well hug up You get to go hang out with everyone birthday September 11th Yeah, well Well I'm gonna say January 6th I'm gonna say January 6th baby What are we gonna do over my birthday? What are we gonna do over your birthday?

What are we gonna do over your birthday? What are we gonna do over your birthday? We're gonna go on a fucking protest What do we go on fucking protest? I got to go jump on a statue of the guy that wore fucking heavy clothing in the summer. Yeah, lonely bird. Yeah, that was like everyone was like, can you believe today?

I was like, you know, there's some also some pretty cool stuff. I can't believe it's going to work. You know, it's not completely above her. There's police place pretty special I'm like oh man You believe in shit. Oh, yeah, happy birthday, man. Yeah Yeah, the streets are on fire. What are you doing? And you're like thanks guys? Oh, probably having some desserts With my name

Blown up some candles Making some wishes Let's take our second break because we do this we have too much fun, and then we take our break late, and then it's like the last half hours is all commercials. But Yannis Poppest has an incredible special on YouTube right now called Mom Love. I mean, it's fucking great. Yannis is one of the funniest people out there. Go watch it, YouTube.com. Sean Patton's got a special coming out soon called number one. You can see him on the road in Milwaukee, Chicago, Denver, and San Francisco. For tickets and other dates visit me, Sean Patton.com. Dan Soder will be at the Tacoma Comedy Club in Washington, July 21st.

Through the 23rd after that, he'll be in Oklahoma and Phoenix for tickets and all other tour dates visit dansoder.com. And big Jay Ocarsten going to be at the funny bone, Albany, New York, July 8th and 9th. And then Bricktown Comedy Club Oklahoma City, July 8th and 9th and then Bricktown Comedy Club Oklahoma City, July 14th through the 16th. Hosted in the nasty show, just for last Montreal, for tickets and all other tour dates, visit bigjaycomedy.com also at thebonfiremerch.com and we'll be right back, hanging out with Sean Patton and Janus Poppuss.

It's the bonfire. Get that post, I hit that fucking post. He did. And now, back to the bonfire, with Big J. O'Coursen and Dan Soder. These back-abond shoes are long and you're smart. You can get robbed if you got a Yankee hat, it's gone. Or some Air Force ones. We're Jordan's stand back.

We're Jordan's hands coming up. We're Jordan's out when you were getting around. Oh yeah. That was gotta be big. Oh that was big. Yeah. Get a kid with Jordan's on the match or feet. You have to have nuts to wear those outside

They pay for them, but don't wear them ever Yeah, just keep put around your house and just fucking walk around and be like I'm cool enjoy him in your own Who are you just create like don't that guy's crazy? Yeah, they guys were in clean He's willing to wear him out strapped. Don't fuck with that guy's dangerous. I got a bazooka I'm sorry. Don't fuck with that guy. He's dangerous. I got a bazooka. Welcome back. I got a sniper rifle trained on it's all Welcome back to the bonfire serious XM facts to talk one of three. I'm Dan Soder big J. Ogrison back tomorrow He just landed from the big Bert Kreischer fully loaded tour so Sean pat and guest hosting and our guest Yannis popus

Yannis popus is new special mom love on YouTube now. Sean Patton got a new special coming out number one. He's also on the road, me, Sean Patton.com. Janice Popus.com for two or eights. Sure, yes, that's what it is. Janice Popus.com is comedy.com. Janice Popus.com.com. Go check out his podcast, Yanni Long Days.

Yes. Yeah, go subscribe. Long days with Janice Popus. Yanni Long Days. Dan Soder.com for two or eights for Dan. Yeah, if I'm supposed to chime in. Big J comedy.com for two or a day, it's for Big J. We're plugin'. Yeah, plug in. We days. Dan Soder.com for Toyota. It's for Dan. You know, if I'm supposed to chime in with you. Big J comedy.com for Toyota. It's for Big J.

We're plug-in. Yeah. We're plug-in everyone. At the beginning of the show, I talked to Sean about drinking, and he kind of said that he thought he could out drink Shane Gillis. Yeah. Throw it down. He'll be there for the first couple of innings.

I think he could. First time around. I think he could make past 10 pretty confident. It's the be a decision. It's the championship rounds. It's the championship rounds that are going to get Sean right now, because Shane can go deep water. I think Shane is your ace. If I'm doing baseball analogy, he's changed your ace. You can depend on him for 67 innings. Sure. Maybe can pitch a complete game. Maybe. Okay. Sean's that guy in the middle of rotation. He, I'm hoping for four or five innings before Sure. Maybe can pitch a complete game. Maybe. Okay. Sean's that guy in the middle of the rotation. He, I'm hoping for four or five

innings before something bad happens. Yeah. Rock. Just every bat. Yeah. Yeah. Well, Sean texted Shane to let him know that the challenge was a foot. You don't challenge a guy grew up in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. Mechanics. I'm a Harrisburg was the big. I'm a Louisiana boy. Yeah. You got a remember he's coming from the swamp. It's not a it's not a crawfish compo You change you make it humid you bring out my heave hair you get fucking these guys in a swamp like atmosphere Get some say give me in a sweaty situation. I think she's sweating it out. She ends uncomfortable

He's calling it gaze I got Gain chances Moves or compensated gonna drink too fast. I'm gonna calling it gays. I got gays. I'm like, Sean's just moving forward. He's gonna hold a compensate. He's gonna drink too fast. I'm gonna drink nice and slow. So I think, I'm gonna make him feel uncomfortable by trying to put that on him. What's the drink gonna be?

I think that a lot. Miller Miller, no, I wanna go make a little ball true. Oh, then you're done. Done. Yeah, if you're doing like a crap American beer, I mean, Shane probably had that in his bottle. He was really press fed. That's what I told you on his on the break. It was probably like in France when they give kids wine.

They put like natural ice. They put natty ice and Shane's fucking juice belt. There you go. I was feeling him and I's first beer was the same drink. Yeah. Of course, like, I don't know why I have this feeling. Are you Irish too? Yeah. It's full. Well, no, I'm half Cajon F. Cajon, yeah, I got it exactly. So yeah, you're right, but if we do like a weird drink, Sean will win. If it's like, yeah, no, I don't know, dude, I'm angry. San Grilla, if it's like Cajon, San Grilla,

you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna,

you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna to yeah Go ahead and eat that yeah, you can only start out with a gator to I think shame would be in trouble if it's swamp drinking Yeah, it's but if it's porch drinking on like a crisp cool night in the middle of nowhere I'm walking into this with my head held high knowing as I've said to you boys. I might get taken Yep, but I ain't gonna get taken with my fucking tail between my legs Am I get taken? Yep. But I ain't gonna get taken with my fucking tail between my legs. I love it.

It's gonna be on my ass. Yeah. You are Rocky Balboa. You'll be in it. You'll be in it. But change is a big, big Irish guy. He can hold a lot more liquor because of his size. Younger, damn.

Younger. I just, as someone that could put up numbers, it's how he puts up his numbers is what you've got to be afraid of. Yeah. Because again, because I did shots. Yeah. You try to go shot got to be afraid of. Yeah, what do you mean? Because again, because I did shots. Yeah. You try to go shot in a beer for me. Yeah.

I dropped Keith Alberstadt, like a bad habit in Nashville. Well, let's talk, like, one of the childhood issues that you guys are running from, because that also determines the strength of the drinker. You're right. That's as the Hawaiians call it, that's your mana. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. That's a pretty true. And I would say, you know, what kind of abuse hawk I did you do in your house? Were you sure? Was that real? No. No, I mean, they call him on a string.

Through it, I would. Yeah. I would say my dad not being there was like great motivation. And then I watched my mom excel at drinking. Yeah, yeah. And Brett brought in strangers who also drank. So I watched men that I didn't know get all fucking crazy.

So that was my motivation. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You got to throw a few back just to drown out the idea of your mom getting fucking hammered with a cock afterwards. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then also. Dan, it's afterwards. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then also, Dan, it's bedtime.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you go, well, I'm gonna put on my headphones and my very loud noise, my music, and hopefully drown it out. Put my, I'm half Irish and half Swedish. And so you think Irish, great.

Swedish is the problem. They drink, yeah. They drink in a way that the government controls their liquor stores. Yeah, they drink on a way that the government controls their liquor stores. Yeah, they drink all northern Europe, that could be because it's actually a fact that southern Europe has had alcohol longer. So the tolerance of southern Europeans is more than northern Europeans. That's why Russia and Sweden are so.

Oh, yeah. Dude, my mom's family, Irish, all still alive for the most part, still drinking. Yeah. That's family drinking a mile above sea level, drinking. Yeah, that's family drinking a mile above sea level too. Yeah, that's an advantage. Drinking and less oxygen. That super power is gone. You were bumped into me at 18, 19 years old,

real fucking problem, getting mountain Dan. Coming down off the mountain, I'm a real fuck. I was laying kids out at Arizona. That's why you can drink so heavily in Louisiana, New Orleans, specifically your mobile low sea level. Yeah, I'm like, it's cheap. I I'm like superman coming down here with you fucking little peon's flying around But you're Protestant. Did you grow Protestant? No, I'm a Catholic. Oh cat a seat the fault Catholic Catholic What is compelling you respect? Yeah, it's some English Catholic, but yeah, so that's Protestant the horse is legal

Yeah, yeah, you're, the Catholics are pushing everything down. Yeah, they pour alcohol on everything. Yeah, yeah. Any game thought anytime they do. Only a second in the guilt game to the Jews. Yeah, maybe one. They see, here's the thing, it's a mean guilt on themselves. The Jews do it like that.

That's what they hurt themselves with. Yeah, Jewish people do it like they drop the ball, like they like, they like, they like, Jewish people open about it. I wish I could be bedded towards a lot of people I love. Catholics are like, it's your fucking fault. Yeah, yeah. I'm trying to teach you fucking pieces.

And I think most Catholics in the South, it was the fault Catholic. It was because it was where the better schools, you know, and like you want to cherish your old board. You're just hearing story about Jesus blood being wound. You're fucking tossing it back. And there's a higher probability you got touched. It's not certainty, but it's a greater percentage

If you got a personality in a nice touch It's a bit so you got to you got to drown that out too So just a fear of it happen or fear of it happen. Oh my god a clammy hand on the back of your neck Say he wants to see you later. Yeah, you're drinking more. Yeah, you know That's a lot of people don't consider that a lot of people just go all the ones who got touched But what are the guys who were how about the kids who were flurryed with? Yeah, so what who didn't have a full grasp what was happening? But they felt something was off they've they got too close to a robe and felt something that was firmer than than the rest of his

Body to a couple Miller lights. I wasn't I wasn't alter boy, but I sucked at it So that was never even considered oh they were like I don't want to fuck this loser my time in this You were the gomer pile. He's not too shy. I would believe it or not. When I was a kid, I was mega shy. Do you think there was a priest that was like, but I heard those were the routiest ones in bed.

I should have made his move. Did you notice Sean made you the camera service? I can't help but think he might be a real freak. Did you notice him trembling while flapping? Father Thomas, they all can't be young James, who will suck all of us off like a circus seal. With his eyes. Sean just seems tense.

You seem tense, Sean. The misogynist. Why are you so tense? As I as I as as Quiver when I crack the Eucharist? Yeah, I don't think you could take an anal penetrating High class English Fawli Xavier that's how you always make the villain. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They always got a British accent Yeah, yeah, kind of like Star Wars everything. Yeah, pretty give him a fucking Delco accent. Yeah, yeah, I always got a British accent. Oh, yeah. Kind of make Star Wars everything, yeah. Really give them a fucking Delco accent? You can't, right?

Yeah, I'm back to fuck these kids. Yeah, I'm back to suck and fuck all these kids. And you have to be like, who, they're young tender. Much like Ville, their muscles. And the thoughts of them. I wouldn't mind sucking off that young old boy like sucking the marrow out of a peo. Yeah, instead of dude god like I love Jesus, I'm a fuck one of them kids. I wear nothing

under the road. Oh man, I'm. Yeah, I think you could, I feel like it was like a mixed drink, you would really have Shane. Lou, DJ Lou thinks if it's a case of fucking Anstel White, he'll walk through anybody. Yeah, like butter. Lou looks like he drinks. Yeah. Yeah.

Well, I'm gonna tell you this, he does. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Black Lou drinks 12 packs of 7.7 alcohol of wine. He's younger though, right? 37 37. He's a little older than Shane. Yeah, delicious IPA baby. Yeah, Shane's 37 is liver's got to be what 56 It's got my list. Yeah, cuz I I retired at 29 and I I still have I still hurt getting them off the couch Yeah, no, you're drinking made you look older when you were 29 you you look younger now Yeah, yeah yeah my best friend I grew up with went man you really lives two decades in your 20

Quit I was like fucking it. Wait, who was your buddy that came to Edinburgh? Zach waste day was clean now. He's clean now. Everyone's retired. Dude everyone's retired Everyone gets out of the game. Yeah, when you see someone get hammered the way you get hammered They're either like done drinking or dead. You're either done drinking or on your way to being done. Yeah, you don't see a guy a decade later, and be like, what's going on? You're like, oh, he's not here anymore.

There's a couple of people. We're all friends with here that are older that have drinking problems. That when I see him like, damn, dude, you never want to say this to him? Yeah. But you want to be like, you know, you're the person that made me afraid of my drinking.

Yeah, but I've said that to a few people, you're the only one who like listened. Everyone else is like, Well, you know what helps with that? You're dad dying of drinking in front of it. Yeah, but you deserve the credit for being like, you know what? Yeah.

I don't even think it was that. I think I was just kind of like, oh yeah, I watched what Serocious does. Right. Fucked up. But man, when he was fine, I would love to yeah, I watched what what's the roses does right? Yeah, right, but man when he was fine I would love to see my dad come back like feel the dreams wipe out all these punks Just fucking watching toss Shane like he's made a

Shulis cuz you don't know his fucking shoes Yeah, my dad comes out of a cornfield and he goes come a take down his bottle of a cardie like you little bitches throw up I love to see you come back and just fucking dominate. Yeah. Was your dad a bicardy guy? Bicardy, run the coach. No, not a moan. Straight up a cardie.

Yeah. He'd get it and he'd mix it with his finger. Mostly, yeah. Mostly rum, it was like you could see through it and then this is splash of code. So you just have memories of your dad mix it and then go and get the coke off with his fountain. And then get his mustache. But he'd pick it up and then do it in that finger and then go on yeah the co-cult with his balance and then get his mustache got you pick it up and then do it in that finger and then go thanks yeah because your mom's

real cut oh that drink the type two yeah I remember your parents who go to the Super Burger your mom would be getting polished your dad just go it over to the colon section. See it's been like $2 for $2. Yeah, it looks like we're not having R&C this weekend. Yeah. I remember my aunt, his sister, he died when I was 14, but then I got to know her when I was older, because she died when I was like 24. So it's safe.

She got sick from helping my dad. My dad threw up blood and it got in her eye. Well, she got hepatitis C and didn't know and she drank and then she got liver cancer. Fuck. What? Do you know what I'm telling you? My family got fucked. Fuck.

But I remember, uh, no, no, no, good deed goes unpunished. Yeah, dude. I remember her pouring me a rum and coke and I was like 19. And I just remember watching it mostly be rum and then hurt us us be like there you go and I was like drinking gas I was like oh fuck lady and she's like that's how me and your dad made it I was like yeah I don't think that's good. What did her eye look like when she was born that oh what do you mean? Like what is hepatitis in the eye? Oh no she got it through her eye but it affected her body so she was normal she was just fucking dying on

the inside. That has to make you ask what like if if they knew her right what what did they do in a past like I don't know it's like my grandfather discovered a poisonous emula yeah and just everyone in his family was like I don't know what happened yeah because no you got your family's got some engine blood on you know there's mom side my mom sides me deep in it my grandfather was born in all Colorado in 1925 You're a patchy Couple of TPs. I got knocked over. I think my family did some dirt and sweetened because they moved to the States and then everyone starts Trump and yeah

I'm gonna have like some mid-summer thing where I'm gonna go back to Sweden and they're like your grandfather Right, so I'm in the paper on Father. Yeah, right. It's a charming paper. He raped in murder. The solder name is infamous with butcher. Wait, what? That's what we're cool.

We're going to the San Francisco. Go Niners. You are the son of a monster. He's the right guy. Everyone has the story of the scary soldiers having Swedish culture. We would tell the story to the children. The sad soldiers. The sad ones stand out.

The sugar. Sugar. What does that mean? They go, when you sleep the saders report you to hell. What? This is why I'm going to die. This is why everyone in my family died. to shout there's reporting with the hell. Wait, what? This is why I'm going to die. This is why everyone in my family died.

It's karma. Oh, dude, so funny. I can ask my dying grandmother, I go, hey, what happened? I can't help you. Oh, dad, I'm so bad. It makes sense, too, because like, evil grandfather like that or ancestors like that, there would be some like goofy like... Yeah, that grand sense.

I'm like a mafia, I'm like a mafia son. Yeah. Tony's the proudest son. I don't know. My dad's name was Catfish Killer, and I'm a Lonzo. I'm a Lonzo Benchellis son. No, wait. Stone Cold Lonzo.

I shot his guy fucking rib- a guy strong and this fucking queer kid I Can do a Rodney danger field It's like this fucking kid I watched you father fucking murder half of the Colombo Or like it was fucking nothing on a Wednesday no doubt on a Wednesday and this is fucking Kate yeah if I go to Sweden that's what I'll be like that I you're telling me that's Charter's the butcher's sign you are a clown you make people smile yeah but I noticed when I went to Sweden when I went to Stockholm and those the liquor stores are like closed

yeah the government keeps a tight, they drink, I've been there so many times, they drink irresponsibly. Oh, right, dude. If I was a government, I would do the same thing. Do they take away your car keys? I mean, they take away the keys to the liquor store? They're like, we don't.

What do you mean they close, it's like open for four minutes, that's fine. So you have to get the alcohol from government stores. All the alcohol's only sold in these government stores and they're only open on certain days for certain times. Wow. Yeah.

Not after hockey games. Yeah. And all they do, everything's so expensive there. The coroner is like, you know, it's so expensive. So what people do is they buy in bulk and then they drink at home before they go out because it's so expensive to drink. Yeah, they call that, and it's all a full spiel. I think it's so expensive to drink. Yeah, they call that...

And it's all foshpiel, I think it's called foshpiel. Foshpiel? Like pre-party. We have foshpiel. And then the shoulders go out in the hands. And the humtowimmer and the children. And you say, fuck him, cure him. What? What are you doing?

What are you doing? What do you mean? Well, I don't have to worst tragedy in this country. Oh, shit. Yeah, dude. And they're all beautiful. So when they fuck, they just get drunk and bang. It's strange how good looking they are. It's strange. They did a little eugenics. They did. It's a dirty secret.

Really? Yeah, yeah. They did. Who do you mean all the ugly, all the the ugly all the ugly's got kicked over to Norway some stuff Norway's got some hoties yeah Norway, but yeah, but not as much as Sweden Sweden Sweden conquered Norway and then they left and then Norway got rich because they got the oil and sweet and this and the salmon and the salmon The salmon money, but it's like yeah Norway Norway's like a. One of the richest countries in the world, most people don't know it. They have all the oil, but they keep it quiet. You know what?

They know we're out there watching. Yeah, America's like, America's like, America's like, can I fucking have some of these? Yeah, we're like, we rob, we're like Omar from the wire. Yeah. Yeah, you got oil and we show up. I feel like America's government, you motherfuckers need some freedom.

Yeah, that's good. I kind of want to bring freedom to Norway. And they have it. No, not like this. And they don't spend any of the money. They keep it in a fund. They just spend all the money they make from oil, from selling oil.

They keep it in some sort of fund and they just hold it. Dude, that was like my cousin who ended up being the most successful in my family. Like, he was a kid and he had mullons. And then I'd be like, what'd you buy? And he's like, I'm saving my money and I'm like, that's fucking lame. Yeah. What do you buy it? And he's like,

Kruthin. Yeah. He just saved all his money from the whole summer. He'd make like $2,000 during the summer. What does he do now? He's a doctor at Johns Hopkins. Yeah, there you go. Yeah, you have it.

He's like saved lives and shit. And my mom's like, what did you do? I was like, I ever heard a live agatha month, come on, he's not told me. Yeah. Last season. So, kinda went out on the back. my mom's like what did you do I was like ever heard of live a Gotham on currently last season so kind of went out the back yeah because I was saving people he saved there was a shoot he uh... did his residency at ls u in norlands and there was a shooting at a

fucking parade and he saved it he like went outside and saved a guy yeah no shit and then my mom's like what about you and I'm like fuck you yeah I mean those guys at least deserve the doctor title to themselves. Yeah. I know it's a cliche thing, but it's like, enough with this everyone's a doctor. Oh, a doctor in emotion,

no,ography, or anything. The key is, why is the PhD? Why is it called the same thing as a medical doctor? Now, if you can fucking fix me, if you can patch me up, you're a doctor. If those people are gonna be called doctors, like, because you have a PhD in sociology, then we gotta call these doctors something else.

That's why, that's what offended me about Jill Biden when they were like, you gotta call our doctor and you go, ooh, what's the doctor it is? Is she, can she do heart surgery? Yeah, yeah. And they're like, no, but she has read a lot. She's read a lot. It's ridiculous.

It's absolutely. Call me a doctor if I can go like, who am I gonna fuck you die? If the guy can help me. Let me tell you while you're not. Yeah, shut the fuck up on my doctor. If you can do that on an airplane, move on a doctor. You're a doctor, but if you're like,

I'm a doctor of philosophy. And Descartes would say in this right now, that you are. Yeah. It's rational. Yeah, and you're like, all right, that's not what in this right now, that you are. Yeah. It's rational. Yeah, and you're like, all right, that's not what I needed right now. Yeah. There's be the guys, you know what, that's not what I needed ever. I don't know if I ever need that.

Someone has a heart attack. Is there a doctor you should be? I'm an optometrist. Yeah. Which one's better? This one? Or this one? This one?

Or this one? You guys, I don't know. I'm fucking dying here, dude. Yeah. Oh, damn, do we're about to go we have they cut us off quick Yannis pop it says a great special out called mom love on YouTube It's one of the best comics go fucking watch him listen to his podcast Sean Patton's got a special coming out called number one. He's gonna be on the walkie Chicago Denver me Sean Patton dot com big J comedy dot com Dan Soder dot com. We love you. We'll be back tomorrow

One minute. God damn it. I thought that was it. Now we can go into the dates, dude. Let's really explore this. Big J, coming off the road, he's going to be a breakdown comedy. Can you go up a little Christine? Just to really give J. That shine. He's going to be at the funny bone, Albany, July 8th and 9th, breakdown comedy club, Oklahoma City, July 14th through the 16th. Host in the nasty show. Big deal, just for laughs Montreal, for tickets going to the world. And then we're going to be going to the world. Albany, July 8th and 9th, Bricktown Comedy Club, Oklahoma City, July 14th through the 16th,

hosting the nasty show, big deal, just for Laf's Montreal, for tickets go to bigjcomedy.com. All in so, we're gonna be at Tacoma Comedy Club in Washington, July 21st, 23rd. After that, Oklahoma and Phoenix for tickets and all the tour dates, danceodor.com, not that net. Yeah, not that net.

And then go watch the honest, you're getting a good reception from the, I mean, I saw this Sebastian video. That was fucking awesome. Yeah, yeah People are loving it people liking it. Yeah, yeah, that YouTube video That's the that's the fucking way the future dude. Yeah, I get yeah, I get you know It's kind of fucking build up build up through it up there corporate overlords also guys I don't want you to forget that you're Lord and savior Jesus Christ Thank you for to forget that you're Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.