The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Beaver Fever with Luis J Gomez

Episode Date: November 13, 2025

Luis J Gomez is in studio promoting Body Brain Coffee, Skankfest, and his new special "You're Making This Worse." | Jacob records a man relieving himself on the subway platform which triggers Bobby's memory of having an accident while camping. | Luis reveals that he had a cool mother who sang karaoke and took him to a Poison concert. Luis J Gomez "You're Making This Worse" is his new stand up special directed by Robert Kelly out on YouTube now! *To hear the full show to go www.siriusxm.com/bonfire to learn more! FOLLOW THE CREW ON SOCIAL MEDIA: @thebonfiresxm @louisjohnson @christinemevans @bigjayoakerson @robertkellylive @louwitzkee @jjbwolf Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of The Bonfire ad-free and a whole week early.  Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

And now, the Bonfire with Big J. O'Kerson and Robert Kelly. Would we have accepted this level of lyricism from blacks? I don't know. I love this. You don't like the Beastie Boys? I do, but they're their own thing in so many ways. It was never really good lyrics or anything. They were a punk rock band, and then they became this. Right.

Which means where's their heart in it, really? Yeah. I kind of liked it as little little little drums and punk and little sure I don't mind it no no I like the Beastie boys a lot I'm just saying weird though I think if there's like three black dudes that would have never gotten popular with the level of what they do what they're saying why you think the the lyrics aren't popping I like them but it's just nonsense that's in their whole inflection thing do they have a huge black following beast boys I don't I think they did.

No, but there are three Jewish kids from Brooklyn. You know what I mean? Yes, I do know what you mean. Bobby, your brain's functioning and firing on all cylinders because you're all body brain coffee up to the fucking eyeballs. And we have the founder of body brain? Founder, CEO. I'm not only the president, I'm also client.

I'm drinking it right now. And me and Lou, every day when we do a live show, DJ Lou, gives me my hot body brain coffee. It delates me. Right in your mouth. Hot BBC right in the mouth? Hell yeah, BBC. But you didn't know that the acronym was, or the initials were BBC.

Everybody told him it made him so happy. It did make me very happy. I don't like a taste of coffee, but I love BBC. So I look about it up more than anything. Lewis is a new special. You're making it worse available right now on YouTube at YouTube.com slash Louis J. Gomez or just look up Lewis. And, of course, you're making this worse. Dude, such a good special.

Thank you. by Bobby Kelly. Great Bobby Kelly. The great Bobby Kelly. We have a theory that Jay had to leave Legion of Skanks Friday had hang early today or a Zoom show because he had a headache like a chick who was trying to get out of fucking me. I don't want

to sex with you anymore. It's weird that you had an eye headache today and Monday I had a fucking extremely bad eye headache too. I went to bed at 10.30. I was like I felt like somebody was plucking nerves behind my eye. We have this theory, though, because we were like, because Jay had to leave, so we should do things that Jay would not normally want to do himself.

So let's, like, pull up some black cocks. Let's pull up some chick shitting. And we realize that Jay just loves long, cylindrical, brown things. Coming out of butts. It's true. I told you Farah Abraham's got a new shit video. Shits on a phone. Yeah.

Crazy. Jacob, you have a video. You've been wanting to show us this week, so we haven't gotten to you. Wait, wait a minute. Wait a minute. What? still same subject do we do we see the video we didn't see it yet right

nobody likes no nobody wants to see it's fine I'll check it out no I want to see it no no I want to see shit come out of an ass I don't want anyone to watch it for you I don't need to see it let me ask a question because we don't have to watch it but is it as good as the first one that we saw no it's it's funny

because she's doing you know she does like character stuff she's like talking shit to somebody who bought this oh it's like if soda was so shit videos Yeah, the shit's coming out of my ass on my phone right now. So what she does is like, no, she's like, shits, and then picks her phone up and just starts bitching about like, oh my God, I guess I shit on my phone now whenever I come, great.

Oh, this is just great. I guess I shit every time I come now, whatever. Some girls do that. Shit whenever they come? Not every time, but I've had that. You had a girl shit? I think she was just trying to shit on you for an excuse. Oh, I guess you fuck the shit out of me.

I got to go. No, dude, she definitely came with her. She just, she faked it, and she just shit. Oh, God, I'm coming so hard. Wow, what a big load. I guess you never want to fuck me again, huh? I think she's weird. I think I liked it.

Did you fuck her again after they shit? Yeah. Oh, God. That would be done. Well, no way, it pooped out of her. It literally, dude, I should you not. It popped out of her asshole like. I liked it.

He's still in special mode. He's still in set-up punch tag. Like a Hershey kiss. It popped out of her asshole and landed on my dick. Oh. And balanced on my dick. Wow. And then it fell.

Did it balance or did it stick? You should have pulled your dick down and shot it in her eye. A little bit of both, right? A little bit of both. Yeah. And then it rolled onto the bed and then it was like, all right, then I was like, I guess I was going to make this her problem later on in life. And then I was like, I feel bad.

So I was like, hey, there's a little piece of shit in your bed right now. She's like, where is it? He goes, it rolled off of the table and onto the floor and your little turn ball. Rolled into the pantry. I was fucking dumped on when she gave birth to Max because she's shit.

Yeah, you should have. I was walked out of the hospital. Like, I'm done with this. I can't deal with that. You fucked her so she'd have a baby, not poop. in front of you why she have to eat what you have to eat first

yeah didn't she know she was gonna have a baby soon ladies it's time to do a little bit of fucking intermittent fasting before you go into labor it's true because you're using the same muscles

to push the kid out that you're pushing the shit out you don't use your asshole muscles to push the kid out dog does the dude max came out of her asshole Max was born Max was born of fart

yeah yeah yeah no Carla she didn't shit thank God But a bunch of other things happened. I was definitely like, ew, I put some of that back. She vomited, like, the exorcists?

Yeah, I was like, put some of that back. Ew, ew, too much stuff. Placentas, red stuff. It's disgusting. So much mock and goo. And the stuff on the baby's gross. The white. I know, they get it off.

Ladies, get it together, girls. What are you doing? You just lay there in your own yuck, like a piece of shit. Yeah, when the baby comes out to you, like, oh, my God, it's beautiful. But you're really going, like, this is the grossest shit I've ever held in my hands. This conversation just reminded me, chicks ain't shit. Mom suck. Why do we give them so much credit when all they do is create a big, fucking nasty mess?

Yeah, all you've done is fucking queef me out of your disgusting pussy. They don't get to use it anymore, either. It's never the same. Jacob, talk to me about the subway experience, because it is not far off subject to what we're talking about. No, this was in Astoria. This is coming to work. Can you tell them on Monday? Storytelling mode, please?

Set us up. I'm not the storyteller. He's a storyteller now. He's a storyteller now. A storyteller. there you go folks you have another special

in the can just from today just from today's episode yeah so I was coming from Astoria and this was the guy directly across on the other platform

now I'm so terrified here like I'm filming it I don't know why everyone he's a cross train tracks He'd have to be a superhero to get to you this is the problem Lewis I'm saying to myself if you're doing this

you have the superpower to if you see me and you're aggravated that I'm filming you, to run under the track and assault me. What is he doing? I don't see it. Well, let's find out. Outside train. He's so scared you're zooming in. Is he sucking his own dick?

No. He could, though, from there. You might have to scroll a little because I kept putting the camera down like I don't want this loon to... You're hiding behind a pole, you pussy? Well, you can zoom in a fast forward almost till about 20 seconds till the end, Christine.

There you go. Oh, you've got the duke and it's white. No, it's really light brown. Yeah, that's like bad kidneys. Oh, it's a black guy too. He did look up of you. Yeah, maybe it's not white. Maybe it's just not as dark as him. I've never been able to multitask thumbing through a trash bag.

That guy has a black dick and he's shitting. Jay is in heaven. Wow. This is incredible. BBC, scat, all the hits, all the biggies. All in one video? What is it, his birthday? Oh, my God. One black, no cup.

Maybe he's looking for toilet paper. The weird thing is, like, two attractive girls just... Well, two attractive women just walked right past him like nothing was happening. He'd feel bad for him. He's a victim of society. That's why Jacob was videotaping the hot women, and then he noticed him in the background. Oh, my. I was just purving on these chicks

And then, oh my Wow He's got a haircut You got to appreciate that Yeah, where is it? He's wearing a backpack He's clearly collecting some Plastic Recycling the guy

He's got some money in his future He cares about the bathroom Yeah, you don't know he didn't pick it up Like a dog after and throw it in the trash can Did you stick around to see if he stuck around and picked it up Yeah, the train came right Yeah, why are you judging dude If you don't even know if you pick it up

Maybe he's homeless He could have picked it up Put in the trashcan Who the fuck do you think you are dude? Yeah He could have baby wipes in that big bag of cans you don't know that you have no idea if you has baby wives or not you just judge this guy for the initial you saw him take a shit outside fucking everybody here's had to take a

shit outside we've all done it we've all done it actually i've shit in front of him yeah and when i shit my pants camping no you don't remember when i you don't remember this no you remember when i i don't know this at all that's but i feel you would remember me and louis went camping with the boys up in where we went camping not our sons they were two boys we found yeah we found too hot boys in fucking the Adirondacks. Yeah, your kids aren't in the shitplay. I know, I tried. I tried to, that one time I watched Max and James,

I tried to get him in a little shit play. They were just, they're really not receptive to it at all. I had, uh, I had beaver fever from the week before. Um, it's, uh, that's like someone Christopher Walken calls, who being horny. I got beva fever, baby. We went, I went up with Ari and, uh, Ari and Joe or Versi,

I went up and... Ari bit you. I said you get our beaver fever. If Ari bite you. You get something if Ari bite you, without a doubt. And I dip my water filter into the river to get water, but it must have been some of the water on the top of it, and I drank it.

So I got... Beaver fever. Beaver fever. And I thought it went away. Bobby's just two big buck teeth. It's happening. I'm just chewing on a tree. Dude, I got a filter.

I got to find a dam. Bobby was bit by a wear, beaver. I just kept slapping my ass on water. Dude, I got beaver, fever. There he goes. And then fucking Mac starts swinging to a beaver, and then he opens a door, and you go, I think we have to talk, son.

I think we have a damn to build. So, I'm going camping the next week with Lewis and the boys. And we had a great week, except we had we had uh we had steaks we cooked it was awesome and then lewis had to go upload a podcast steaks we had a little piece of wood that we chewed on so we had to go find like a dunkin donuts with Wi-Fi and sit there for two hours where he uploaded a whole fucking podcast it ruined the whole fucking trip it was a weird last podcast we had to find Wi-Fi in the woods it was he said dude

I got to find it now so we had to drive around until we found free Wi-Fi found the Blair witch house was like dude come on this is it dude i don't know this place has a little handprints on the wall that means there's kids here kids no technology technology means wifi but we we cooked this amazing meal steaks and and and and like corn all this stuff and he was like dude i got to do it now it has to be done now so we just left and we left all the steaks wrapped in tinfoil all the food on the picnic table and then when we came back there was like 18 raccoons just and they just looked at us like what bitch you left it i understand you left all the food out we've we just i i just

slipped my mind because he was he was panicking me he's like dude i got to upload this now oh i'm not it's not gonna make it master woodsman just left stakes on a table in the woods i've done this once in my life when i was 17 years old bobby he just left all the stakes it's a crazy move to leave those things out and go do something else i tell you were panicking you should have not taken lewis to do the wifi he had to get this effort yeah you tried to get this effort yeah you try fucking doing that. Can't miss the gas digital premiere. Buddy, he was like, we have to do it.

It has to be out in the hour. We have to. He was just panicking because it had to be out at a certain time. And we're in the middle of the fucking woods. And I'm like, I don't know what to tell you, dude. And he's like, we can go find it. And we found it.

He fucking, this fucking maniac found Wi-Fi. And then we just sat in a car with the boys for two hours, what, uploaded. It was a very unique experience camping. Sounds horrible. It sounds like Lewis Ruin camping For a few hours And then

So we come back And the meal That's a great series We should do Lewis Runes And then whatever it is That's like Adam Ruin That was a show Adam ruins everything Oh really?

Yeah but it doesn't matter It's hilarious But you can ruin it Yeah but he's ruining it differently He's going in there with like facts It's just you show up And you ruin it with your personnel Yeah

He was me You know like Dude this is a fucking This is a silent retreat What? All dead? You're ruining the silent retreat That's the game

You go, you're ruining this retreat When they say it, you finally turn to the camera He goes, you're rooting the silent retreat And you go, ting It ruins everything We come back, we're literally We're all scared I mean, it was probably like two big raccoons

And like 15 baby raccoons Just staring at us Wherever you standoff with our family versus their family It was two big humans And two baby humans And then they took the state right they just they were like fuck you and just grabbed the steak and took it with them and then

and then we we camped out whatever we we had a good night and the we always podcast went up too so everything it went up right we wound up having it we watched the movie outside yeah dude and then camping things and then uh the next day outdoor movie yeah podcasting it kind of bug me it kind of bug me too because we built the generator i told lewis i go you got to get your own tent i don't i have my tent you gotta get your tent and he went out and just bought this fucking sick tent that you just like push your button

and it pops up and I'm sitting there just putting poles together going cuck sucker motherfucker he's like dude check this that funk it just popped up and you can stand in it I was like fuck off

me and Max are just crawling into my tent and it has heat lamps sorry I'm doing an impression of myself look how much space I have oh my God and he kept letting me know dude this is really good tent right I'm like yeah it's a good

dead whatever i wanted you to be proud of me i was very proud christie you don't have to leave the pause screen it's just the turd falling out of the gas are you trying to really grind that into jacob make him upset so that's never been camping i don't think now he went we did we do comedy camp but i had to get him the house that's not real camping that's i actually got yeah i got him have you been in a tent james no he would never go don't call me james james james my baby james that's my name we call you jims behind your back you don't know that big jims um big jims no now when i was like a kid like outside my friend his family would go they had a camper set up like a trailer park for we're not a camping park like I guess on the weekends they would go out there and like I stayed in a

tent one night out there with him my buddy but like that was it never as an adult or a teenager ever yeah well I was like you were trying to hide something from that night yeah yeah you just really glaze over that night what happened was that you spit your palm and fucking stick it slept in a tent I thought you just asked me you didn't do anything else that we got into Well, what do you think? What is... Do my mouth start watering? That's starting getting mustache sweat

from thinking about him growing inside of me, inside of my mouth? We did comedy camp. It was fun. That was... Yeah, but everything, like... And Bobby's good at this, too. He's very good at, like, oh, man, it's fun. This is...

It's awesome. And then every step of the way, though, it's exactly it's that. It's like, oh, fucking wolves came and took all of our food. And then Bobby would be like, in the middle of the night. A skunk wouldn't let me alone. I had to be awake on that because a skunk was fucking attacking me under the thing. Was it all set up like fake?

No, no, no, no. We went, we did comedy camp. It was, I mean, it was everybody. A bunch of people went up. Not me. But I took, we were. It was everybody except your actual close friends. It was fucking, dumb, dumb,

Leslie Jones and Bobby Lee. I could go. I would have. Leslie Jones and Lenny markers together. You're talking about the show comedy game. Yeah. No, I'm talking about we did comedy camp as a group just on a weekend.

Oh, yeah, you also didn't invite me to that. I did invite you to that and you said you couldn't go. Absolutely. He's a dirty lie. 100% I invited you. 100. I invited him. But that night, I fucked up too because I...

I don't remember you were in Reading Lewis. I did. I didn't spit your eyes to make it more serious. I cook breakfast for everybody, bacon and eggs. He's like, so then we said, you know, before we eat this, let's go take a hike. We took a three-mile hike.

Let's leave this out here and go take shit. showers inside. Squirrels were eating it. I took the baking grease and I put it into a Coke can or a beer can and drink it. And then I fucking just keeps away fruit flies. I just left it. I forgot to throw it out. I was supposed to take it to the garbage. Bobby shotgun did. I forgot to throw it out. I just I put it over to the side by a tree and then forgot about it. So later that night, I was in a hammock and I'm swinging between these two trees and I felt something. go under my tent. Yeah, well, not a 10.

It's a hammock, yeah, hammock. But it's an enclosed, like, vampires hammond. Yeah, it was like a spaceship. That hangs from a tree. Honestly, God, what it's set up for is for you to go take baseball bats and kill Bobby in his sleep while he's in a tomb.

I was just hanging from two trees in the perfect middle thing. You could just wail on this thing. I was hanging like a burjuto in between two trees. Go back to it? Hold on. It's called the Arm monk. Armank.

Armunk. That was a one one. But, anyway, the thing went onto my tent and everybody was asleep but I heard Ari just go into his tent so I called him on my phone and I go dude something's under my tent

and he's like what I'm like come on to you something just went under my tent so he came out and he goes holy shit I was like what is it he goes it's the biggest skunk I've ever seen and it's just going back and forth under my tent and I go what's it doing

and he goes I don't know it's got its face and something I go, what? He goes, like a beer can or something? I go, oh, shit. He goes, what? I go, I forgot to throw out the bacon grease. The fucking skunk smelled the baker's just chowing on the baking grease under my tent for fucking like 15 minutes.

We left some kind of food out when we went to that trip also and came back and the raccoons were all on the table. It's the one rule. I know. Don't leave food out. It's hard. But we went, when we went, we'll pack. I have so much. That's a fast move on.

He goes, there it is right there it's hard. It's hard to not leave food out. Yeah, there it is. There it is. I was just swinging like meat. So this is to sleep in. This is a sleep in. You sleep in it, you lie flat.

It has a sleeping mattress and it actually has a net that goes around the whole thing so nothing can get in on it. I get this from my house. This is nice. What? What? What's the different of the table? Is they have a bed? In your room?

Just the hammock? They made a two-person one. That's funny. There it is. Oh, that's right, dude There's a little dangler in your room I'm gonna go dangle in my room So the next night

The next day we're packing up And I'm doing all my packing He just pushes a button And his tent folds up And I'm loading everything into the truck He was on the phone Making, you know, doing Business, exactly

Making business, planting seeds Right And then it hit me again It hit me like a ton of bricks I just I ran into the woods and just found a tree and then all of a sudden

I see Lewis laughing his ass You mean he found the tree like the perfect tree because there's trees everywhere right I just found a tree away from the boys I didn't want my son and his friend to see me shitting my pants

sure so I just ran as far as I could into the tree and then I just see Lewis dude what's up dude and then he just starts laughing and his phone is up and he's just going he's shitting your pants man

he's just filming me shit and I'm going dude you fucking I'm just shitting going you fucking erase that man I swear to God I'll fucking kill you erase it now and he's like dude

you were shitting your pants I mean I was shitting you did you pulled your pants okay I was gonna say if you were shitting your pants while I was out he's just yelling

and you're just yelling and shitting your pants is pretty fucking hilarious I was just shitting into the fucking grass and it was just coming out and he's just filming me I was so angry

is that we've all been there so why are you such a judgmental person about this is that the best way of it Jacob maybe is never shit outside right Jacob you've had to shit outside everyone else you've never shit your pants

have you pissed outside oh yeah but I've never shit my pants so this guy shits outside one time that's that but you pissing left and right outside it's a white privilege never shit outside ever even as a child nothing ever

I mean mine I think mine's pretty much as a child mine only was I think one time so I could have avoided that as a kid yeah it was one time as an adult or as a kid I'm shit I was a lot yeah what's a lot well every time I go that primitive camp and there's no toilets up there

you gotta dig a hole one year you had to do a long walk to represent a state oh that is um wow it's the long walk Louis just saw the long walk I can only reference things that I've seen in the past week

When Lewis watches it It's the whole thing for a week You can only reference things you've seen in the last week Then you forget Then you always forget It's gone, yeah dude It's just Yeah I've yeah you gotta dig a hole

And uh and shitting it And then cover it up You just stay home Yeah you could but you don't experience the woods Shitting outside The woods suck though I took Paul Verzi up to do it one time Oh no

But I have or take his gold chain he did wear he wore camo nikes nice like a fucking asshole i like that and i gave him his shit bag with toilet paper baby wipes and a trowel and he's that same thing you gave prostitutes in brazil when you're done no i gave them i gave them wife beaters deodorant and toothpaste toothpaste toothpaste and then uh he's like dude i go he's like what's that for i go well we have to shit up there there's no toilets so he was panicking the whole time and as we're driving up he goes I have an idea. I go, what's that?

He goes, we go to Dunkin' Donuts. We get two egg sandwiches each, a large ice coffee. We drink and eat as fast as we can, and we shit at the Dunkin' Donuts, and then we won't have to shit up there. And I was like, all right, we'll try it. And we went, we did it. We both had a shit at the same time.

We both shit at Dunkin' Donuts and didn't have to shit up in the woods. It worked. At the same time, you had to shit? Well, he shit, then I shit. I was going to say, that's weird. Just talk through the stalls. You never did the fifth function

and talk to your pal while you're taking of shit? I don't answer my phone when I'm shitting or anything. I love to what I know to do. I'll call him, then he'll dead the call. And before the text even comes through, I was like, how he's shitting, and then I get a text, shitting. I'd talk to people I'm shitting all the time. I talk to people when I'm

talking to people all the time. Why are you so against talking to people while you're shitting? I don't know. It's my time. It's a turd. That's a sacred time for him when he's his own turd to observe. He was down there. It's my time. Like the Goonies. I've been on a Zoom. call. I was shitting. No, you haven't. Yeah, I just

put the phone up to the ceiling. You see the black cop who was in a Zoom meeting in court? He didn't have pants on? Yeah. You had the whole outfit from the top up. The camera was... It looked like Poncherello from

the waist up and then had no pants on talking to a judge. The judge was like, are you not wearing pants? He's like, uh... Pardon? Yeah. Well, it says. I was a police officer. It looks like a large fishburn.

It's almost like an alternative universe where black people have taken over because the black judge and a black cop. He's raising his right hand with no pants on. Oh, that's hilarious. No, you got to rewind it. You got to hear it. Oh, yeah. He forgot he had to raise. Yes, off the jacket.

Too bad, you can't see. You got to have pants on, I'm not. No, sir. You can't have, you have to have pants in a virtual court? Is that a thing? It turns out. I don't think you have to at all. The virtual court things, I mean, that means so,

the cat is still my favorite thing, maybe that ever happens. judge at the same personality as Steve Harvey it's so funny. What did you say that? Come on now with it. You're all nuts. You're not wearing no pants in that officer? Boy what? Boy what? Yeah, I love to he just said no, sir.

Listen, the judge's response is so funny. Yeah, the judge is not being very judgy. He's like, boy crazy, he ain't got a motherfucker of pants, hell. Well, you know he's talking about the telephone.

Oh, now, oh, player, officer. Now, no, no, now, now. Do I want to say, I know it's our last day of the week. What had the lady, the stranger things get ready to come out, and the girl's saying that the guy who plays her adoptive father is mean to her in real life. Millie Bobby Brown, though, seems like she sucks. Like any kind of interview I've seen with her? she seems really...

She got hot, right? Yeah. I think she got... She looks like she's 40. Yeah, she looks for... Jacob, you're a fucking pervert who takes videos of people taking shits in public. Don't let him talk to you like that, Jacob, you're a good person.

You're fine. I have an opinion. She's only 21, but she does look like she's... She looks like a... She looks old as shit. Yeah, because she really is a... She's British. Yeah.

Which age like fucking dog years. Yeah. And she really is just like... But I want to hear what she says about one of our national treasures, David Harbor. The guy who made... fat people feel like there's a chance for us he got in shape and everything

she's reportedly they crashed on the set of danger or clashed instead of Stranger Things according to Daily Mail Brown formally complained about Harbor before the co-stars reunited to film the fifth and final season

of Stranger Things really she found a harassment and bullying claim before they shoot the season but that made the season comfortable as shit to suit now I need you to come in here David remember you're so excited to see 11 you love her so much you thought you were never going to see her again you guys are having a major reunion he's like

all right are you ready cunt because I'm ready let me guess do you have to go to the bathroom and get your makeup touched up again this dumb bitch action 11 11 what did he do though

what makes her a large umbrella it says there's pages and pages of accusation but I haven't found anything Oh, my God, this bitch rambles on or not. But it's in the news. He said nothing sexual. So he's just bullying. Boo.

And she's just being mean to her. Isn't that thing, one of the storylines in that was she was, like, shutting him out. She wouldn't talk to him. And he was always like, come on, 11. Why won't you talk to me? And this is he'll cut. He goes, I don't want to talk to you anyway, you fucking cow. You stupid British cow.

You have old face. Yeah. Everyone thinks you have old face. Yeah. Everyone knows you're probably going to get fat. Oh, Harbor. David. Bro.

What a shitty accusation to make, again. If it's just like he's kind of mean to me, take it up internally, man. What is this fucking... It's so subjective. I defend anyone's right to be mean or their employees. Right, Paco? I know you do.

He says he right, Paco. I punch them in the face. You do, but with gloves on, which they do appreciate. Sometimes not. He hit you in the face without gloves. he especially in his early boxing career this is real he would shadow box but then sometimes forget that it's shadow boxing and then actually connect my shadow it's my shadow it's my shadow

it's Chinese and he's also wearing like a Rolex sometimes and he'll forget that who is who is me Louis and then he'll hit you and be like oh my bad he's wearing a what I don't I don't wear her He doesn't have a roll. Do you tell him that, do you tell Paco that it's a Rolex? Paco Relax. It's not a Rolex? Oh, you say Pacco relax. Oh, I got it.

Oh, that's it. I got it. Paco, don't listen to my Lamborghini is downstairs. You know that video? I'm also surprised you have something called a Lorex. No, no, it's not a Rolex. I liked it, Jay. I liked it.

I didn't think it was bad. A Lorex? I liked it. I know I saw the movie. It was a good movie. No, it was nothing to do with the Lorax. It's not the one where they took all the trees. No, I was making the L, the R, and the R, because Paco's, Asian.

Hey, I have a real bay of headache. I have to sign off this show if you guys are mine. I'm going to bet a little bit early if you guys are cool with that. Yeah, y'alli. Remember that video I posted of me getting the car? Did you see that? To McLaren. Everyone was all stoked for you.

People are still congratulating me. Still? Yeah, like, they think I really bought a, $250,000 in McLaren. Well, no, they think Dawn bought it for you. That's what you said. Yeah, that my wife would buy me... Were you making fun of Bert?

Did he get McLaren? No, but that's something that he would post. He's like, oh, yeah, my wife bought me a McLaren with my money. I'm going to say, I do not understand. He got fucking heat for posting, like, jokey AI pictures of Leanne. Oh, that was AI? Like in bathing suit? Yeah.

Did you not know that? Maybe that's the thing that people don't realize is why. No, I thought he literally... No, you knew that was AI. I swear in my son's life. Can I say something? I swear to God, I thought she just did something. I thought she did something.

My wife just sent me these pictures and it's her posing, scantily, really? No, I thought it was like professionally shot photos and a promo. I thought it was, I didn't know it. Dude, you might be wrong, Jay. I'm totally right. How do you know? I commented on it. I said I was a photographer.

Well, yeah, we're stupid. Yeah, but that doesn't mean anything. That's 100% not Leigh Ann. That's not Leah. I'm dumb. Hey, Jay, look. I thought Leanne was doing like a fish journey. Jay, I'm a fucking idiot.

I'm sorry. What the fuck? The stomach's a different in every photo. She looks fantastic. But yeah, people got mad. That last one's her, though. Why do they get mad? It's inappropriate.

Like, it's fucked up. Like, you're posting that of your wife. And then some people complain that it seems like you're saying her body's not good as is. Is she doing this AI thing? Also, I mean, all right, never mind. just are you 100% it's not her real body yes a thousand percent a thousand percent

look at the stomachs they're different the body it should be better if it's a high go to the next one I was like oh good for Leanne she looks good for whatever she is like a 70 year old woman or whatever I was like but because that's AI that's just not that impressive well I think the joke was to make it not too cornyish like fake

yeah I had one of those when I was a kid like at the carnival like down the shore, they put your head in, like, a jacked body. And I had it on my own wall. I'm still looking at myself with the hot abs. You can see yourself jacked?

Yeah. With squeezing a big, big nipple of like on yourself, too? It's like never a that cool picture. I never had, like, the old-timey photos with the family. We never had the money to, like, you know, you go into a booth.

It was only like 20 bucks or whatever, but you, like, put on, like, old-timey clothes and then they take a picture of you. And they put it in, like, a wood, ornate frame. Yeah. I've never had that ever. I got it done with Dawn. I've never had a silly.

Never had silly novelty boardwalk pictures ever. I did it once in a do. He's on photo booth. Oh, you never did like the caricature? Where they drew your face all big and fun? It sucked because I couldn't be like a gunslinger. I had to be a bartender because I was so fat. Oh, yeah.

Give you a little tiny bowtie. And the thing on your arm. And you a thing on your band on your arm? A little garter on your arm. I own the bar, see? Yeah, this shit, dude. That's Knotsberry farm. They do it.

I never, I've never done it, I would love it. We should get these photos done, boys. What, professionally done photos? Yeah. Could we all be samurai, like Steinberg? Ooh, I like that. I want to be a Jason Steinberg story. I want a Samarik.

Oh, my God. He escaped. Is that not Black Lou? That was not correct. Damn. For the time. Yeah, we will look. I wouldn't do this.

I did it. Me and my mom and my sister, we had a big pin that, with our, like, faces on it. The three of us, like, a picture. got it into a pins. That nobody ever wore. You should have. Nobody ever wore this pin.

If I could find it, I would. If I could find it, that would be great. Do you put it on a backpack? Yeah, we're to the Puerto Rican Day parade. Yeah, and then there was a tape of my sister and my mom doing a cover. They would do like a karaoke booth as well. And they did homesweet home by Motley Crew. And that song always reminds me.

Your mom and sister. Yeah, yeah. Really? Yeah, yeah. Your mom sang homesweet home. Did she know it? Yeah, of course. I don't know how dope or not your mom was.

of course my mom didn't know home sweet home when it came out no yeah my mom was like yeah she was into like the hair metal and shit that me and my sister burned too really she took us to see poison she was being a fucking hor bag you smoking cigarettes and her hair old teased up your mom was awesome dude smoking sucking fucking dude chill hell on Jesus Christ she was a party my mom did a she had the same personality as you fucking the doors your mom just always saying goes Mom come in

Stop sitting on the ledge of the hotel It's all bullshit Break on through The other side Can you hear the Indian screaming Boy Mom Seriously mom

Get inside you're going to kill yourself That's just one of my many lives boy Want to see if mommy can fly Want to see how many lives mom Mommy has that. My mom's personality is the doors. Stop, mom, seriously, you're scaring me. Come in.

Why don't you die with me, son? We could die together and be forever. Mom, seriously, Mom. Lewis has got your special. How's it doing, bro? Just a great 100,000 views as of right now. Nice. Fantastic.

Came out a couple days ago. Great special, dude. You fucking killed it. 300,000. That's what we're trying to get to, boys. You're going to get more than that. You're going to get way more than that. Why are you going to set you going so low?

I want 300,000 on YouTube, 1.6 million on Twitter. 2 million. 2 million on Instagram today. It's available right now on YouTube, directed by Bobby, of course, performed and written by the great Louis J. Gomez. It's called You're Making This Worse. Go check it out over on YouTube right now. YouTube.com slash Lewis J. Gomez. That's L-U-I-S.

And then Lewis, of course, is going to be at Skangfest. It's his jam. November 13th through the 16th. We're going to do some fun comedy jam stuff, Lewis. Oh, I'm pumped. After that, he's going to be in Nashville, Columbus, Ohio, Miami'sburg, Ohio, and Batavia, Illinois. For tickets and all tour dates, go to Lewisofskanks.com. And Body Brain Coffee available right now at bodybrain coffee.com.

Way. Big Jay's going to be in Tampa this weekend. Side spliters. He's got another show on Sunday. Two now added in. He's got two. So fill those up. All the other shows.

shows are sold out so make sure you check him out and of course he's going to be at skankfest and he's going to be at the Gramacy in New York for Story Wars with Lewis Tuesday, November 11th and then that's it, go to bigjiccomedy.com for his

new special is on YouTube.com slash EpicJ. Okerson Them day and there you go and check me out at the Comedy Connection. I'll be doing a I'll be also doing a Christmas crowdwork. Oh, you are? It's funny because Matt Rife is... Comics come home this weekend. Garden in Boston. That's right

Bobby's coming home to you. After that he's going to be in New Orleans for Skank Fest. Providence Rhode Island is a biggie. Make sure we fill all those shows. He'll add shows if he has to. Don't do that. I'm not adding shows. I'm not adding shows. No, if you have to, though. I want to come home someday. If you sell out tickets, Bobby will never stop performing in Providence Road Island. I know

I made this joke before. But you like Providence. I love Providence. It's more Warwick, but you'll stay there as long as you need to be. Point Pleasant. Go to punchup.org slash Robert Kelly. We will be back next week live. Enjoy the pre-record tomorrow. Until then, stay crackly? No, you're not nailing it.

You're there, you're close.