The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Between A Rock & A Hard Place

Episode Date: October 6, 2026

Bob believes that Jay has some hidden childhood trauma. Jay thinks it may be possible given the way he behaves and dresses. Christine gives the latest updates on the sad Carrot Top situation. Bobby thinks it's a classic case of extortion. | Jay gives Jacob a hypothetical, indecent proposal where he must chose the lesser of two evils. The two evils: being romanced by either Jay or Bobby. Jacob considers the pros and cons before making his decision. *To hear the full show go to www.siriusxm.com/bonfire to learn more! FOLLOW THE CREW ON SOCIAL MEDIA: @thebonfiresxm @louisjohnson @christinemevans @bigjayoakerson @robertkellylive @louwitzkee @jjbwolf Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of The Bonfire ad-free and a whole week early. Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

And now, the bonfire with Big J. O'Kerson and Robert Kelly. We all could have been singers in the 80s, man. Yeah, it was very, like, talk sing. Talk singing, dude. Talksing. Anybody in this room can sound like the guy from ABC. That's the look. The look of love.

That's the look. That's the look. The look of love. I just thought of a great sketch idea. Yeah. Because now that Paco's out of stand-up and is into sketches. It's fully quit stand-up. We do a sketch.

But what's that little Maliki Waka-Waka girl you like that you fell in love with? Mayu Matasaka-Hugi. Makasaka-hugi. Yeah. You fell in love with. She fell in love with. She's a child. You're infatuated.

She's a child. You can be infatuated with the child. I'm not infatuated. I'm impressed with her fantastic dancing. We do years later. I'm going to invite her to stay in my place for a little bit. What? No, to train.

Okay. I want to train me to date. We do a thing, two sketch ideas, ready? We have to do a thing where you fell in love with her, her art, not her individually. Got you. You fall in love with art, you want to learn it. I do.

And you fly in the guy that her master that taught her, which is Paco. And he teaches you karate, like kickboxer with Van That. He teaches you like that, like all the methods, a karate kid type way to become, that dancer. Was that this show? I don't know who was this show that we talked about.

Miku, Makasaki. Pre-tape. That was pre-tape. It's coming up. Yeah, it's just my favorite dancer right now. You guys don't know that I always have a favorite dancer. I was molested. I was, I was molested too, but I think it was by your uncles.

I think your uncles fucking made the trip. I think, I'll tell you what, they said, worth the drive when I was done. There's no way with your. look and your music like genres eclectic everything you know your whole thing yeah that you have is molested yeah yeah yeah a lot

of the stuff you do no doubt you're like a man but you're also a woman yeah I have some like sexual deviances yeah all says molested but I don't recall it at all I think it was so bad or so good that you pushed it I'm pretty sure Christine was molested but she's not she doesn't have any there's no recollection no thoughts of it I mean we both behave like we were molested yeah we were Probably molested. I don't remember it.

You guys were so molested. Who got me, though? I want to know who it was. Somebody got you. I'd hate for it to be Joe. I bought him a Rolex. No, you're too old with Joe. No.

You're right. That means I would have wanted it. That means you were into it. If I was a relationship. If I fuck Joe, dude, we were just seeing each other. My mom's back. I was being shitty to my mom, really. You're just sucking him off in the car.

What about that guy that lives in your grandma's basement? Billy. No. Wait a man. Wait a good kid. What? What was that? Billy.

You had a guy living in your basement? No, no, no. My grandmother had a tenant. My uncle's, her son's best friend forever since they were kids. And it was in the basement. Yeah. And did you ever go down there? Yeah.

Do you hang out with Billy? No, not really. Mm-hmm? No, his girlfriend I would hang out with. You hung out with her? Yeah. She actually came in one of my shows. Sure they didn't turn you out?

No. I'm not sure. I don't think so. I'm saying my behavior would let you believe something had, but no, I don't really do me a good guy. If we could get somebody on. Brother, older brother, Cliff? Molested you. No, could have been my dad, though.

That's my mom's boyfriend before my dad. Like, long-term boyfriend? She had was, it was this guy's brother. But he was so Jewy that they went to go see Clockwork Orange in a movie theater, and he panicked passed out from fear of the movie. From what part? And so for that reason only.

I think you could probably make a really easy, strong argument that Cliff, I don't know anything about his fatherhood, what he's done as a father. I bet he's done lights out better than my dad's done with me. But I'm still, I'll take my dad who would not pass out of a movie in front of a chick over that guy being my dad. Fucking nuts. Yeah. I think, I'd rather have my dad be awesome and unattentive to it.

I'd rather have my dad be an awesome deadbeat than a super attentive fucking momo, fucking passing out of movies when we go to see it. But I go, Dad, can you take me a scene at my number on the street? He goes, too scary, son. No way. He goes, you're supposed to protect me from the scary. He passed out from the fear of this movie. I guess he put himself in the victim's position.

He knew as a Jewish boy, he's bound to eventually get raped by hooligans in your own house. God, this movie is so weird. This movie was weird. I never really enjoyed it. It was a one-watch watch for me. Yeah, it's a one-worn. Norton loves it. He thinks he's like one of the greatest movies.

I think it's definitely a weird. Because he was molested. He was not molested. He was willing. He was molested. He was aggressively sexualizing adults. Yeah. I'm pretty sure he had signs.

He was just a very sexual. I threatened my uncle in the fucking me. Most kids had lemonade stands. He had suck you off under the stairs booths. Aid. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Hey, you want a glass of blowjob aid?

Yeah, this is too. not scary enough of a movie to have a seizure. Yeah, a seizure. Didn't that happen to your little brother? Yeah, he's a little fucking quefe too. He had a seizure in a movie? No, we were watching it at the house. Silver Bullet.

The Werewolf movie? Yeah. The one with the blonde? I think Corey Hayne was in it. But there's a pretty, there's a pretty gnarly werewolf change in it. I think he comes out of the mouth. But when my brother was young

and I just, like said, I wasn't a very good babysitter. They're alive. They're all alive and fine, but like, I just like, oh, I want to watch Silver Bullet. I think my little brother, I would show him some horror movies. He was pretty young, and I was like, oh, I haven't watched this since I was like a little kid saying this is like a teenager or still. I watched as I was a little kid. Let's watch this. Did I watch Silver Bullet?

And we put it on, and that scene happened. And he, it wasn't in anything. He just stared. He just got staring at the TV, but it looked like he went catatatom. And I went, Bobby, that's crazy, Werewolf change, right? And he just wasn't answering, go, Bob, Yeah, Bobby.

Bobby, Robbie rabbit thing, he was just like, it's like, And I go, what's right? And then I finally, like, and like, I shook him eventually. And he just kind of like, you know, almost had like a, what, like, he didn't know what happened. And when he got home, like, we took him to the hospital, and they were like, he just had like a fucking fear seizure, basically. He had a fear seizure?

That's a thing? Yeah. Holy shit. I mean, I'm a pussy at heart. movies but I've never seized up I'll scream and run. Yeah you have a lady seizure you can have been run around the room I really don't like them but I've never

been really scared at werewolves Dracula that shit does demons things that are real spiders though dude spiders are real absolutely spiders are real yeah spiders fuck me up absolutely but immigrants going up immigrants walking up your block what does that sound like has Bobby react to that that's that's the Lord

I can imitate it. Bam, boom, blah, blah, bu. Sam. Hey, Lou, stick the buttons. I think you're doing fantastic. I would reply with buttons, but... Can we dig in... Can we dig in it all to...

Caratop's story? It's developing. There's more news? There's a little more news. If we can get the most current article... If we can get the most... Card article, please. I had him, he came to my YKWD at Skankfest in Vegas.

Mm-hmm. And he told you everything and you just didn't tell anybody. No, he didn't tell me. You should be subpoenaed probably. If you're listening out there, subpoena Bobby to, Bobby wants to be tied up in court for a couple months. I got you, Bob. He was, thanks. Appreciate it, Jake.

No, he was, I was shocked. What a sweet, awesome, very kind of insecure guy. Yeah, we wanted to have those facts with you. Well, I wasn't gay. Not with me. I'm not as type. You don't know that? I do know it.

Why, you're too old? I'm nobody's... I'm a very eclectic type for gay people. I plow you, dude. I know. I'm your type. I'd let you fuck my face, all that shit. Yeah, dude, because I'm your type.

Could you feel comfortable around me? I guess so, you're right. Yeah, he's kind of shredded. Yeah. He doesn't want a dumpy guy. Yeah. He wants another shredded guy. I just want to slow dance and kiss you.

Yucky, yicky, yaggy. Your beard? I just want to grab your body. beard and pull it down. Our beards. How old is carrot up? He's 72. 61.

I'm sorry. Sixty one. And so is that the guy he was trying to hit on? Because that looks like fucking Isaac from the children of the corn. I'll tell you what, when you listen to him talk, you hear scumbag. When you hear that guy talk, he reminds me of... Who is that? He's just, he's got that scumbag.

But who is he? I think this is a guy extorting him. That's the guy extorting him. But when he talks, he's just... Listen to the way he talks. It's just scumbag. I thought it was a 19-year-old. It wasn't 19, like many years ago?

I don't know. We have no facts. No, this is right. So the guy's been harassing him for two years. He's been threatening to release sexually explicit material. Right, but he got it from Caratatat. He was Caratop's opener for a minute. Is that the guy?

Yeah. I think he was his opener and they were accusing him of having these, these videos of him exposing him being doing some crazy stuff and this guy when he was talking about it you could tell he's lying you can tell he's a scumbag and you can tell he's fucking 100% he's lying I mean just the way you don't think caratop did gay shit at all I think carot did gay shit but he's saying that he's innocent like he's not doing this oh the guy saying I'm not extorting him at all yeah play that guy talking can you play that video that guy right there play that Hold on one second's gonna go

He's like what do you think I wanna fuck air top No I just you know I I have this thing I can fucking feel when someone's a piece of shit Like I can meet somebody wants And be like that guy's garbage And I've been right probably 99% of the time

Years later I find out People would be like oh he's a good guy I'm like he's a fucking piece of shit And years later someone will come up You remember that guy? He was a piece of shit I got that thing It's too late It's too late

Everybody told you said guys I'm telling you John Wayne Gays Not a good guy. Stop letting your kids trick-or-treat over there. That's right. No one listened. No one listened to me. Damn.

You're a whistleblower. I'm a... No, I'm... Bobby whistleblower. I don't like that you don't believe in my powers. I do. I do have powers. Who believes in your powers more than me?

Not your family? You're right. That's how I control you through telling you no one else loves you but me. Your family barely loves you. Fucking works. Only I care about you, you do. You know why I work in therapy day today.

You get me on those days. Only I know. at you and only I care about you I care about your happiness I want you to eat your own personal pizza I was this little TMZ this guy this is Karatop's accuser but he didn't fuck him this guy

no because there's another there's another person there's a whole other article that says he like fucking basically fucked someone who was drunk a guy I think he has video of things that he sent to somebody he's Carrotup sent stuff to somebody I believe and he has this stuff that would incriminate him of stuff that

Caratop doesn't want out there. But one of the guys says a thing where he's like, he got me drunk and we basically raped him. Come on, Caratop's not going to rape anybody without props. It's going to be a fun rape. Yeah, it'd be a serious. It's at the end of a Rue Goldberg machine. Caratop has a thing.

He drops a marble and hits 50 dominoes and points a little thing. It's a gun that shoots out, but it's a dildo that goes in your ass. It's a dildo. It finally goes in your ass. It finally goes in your ass. The next thing I filed was a moment. motion for leave. His next ruling, he's fixatious. After I followed his order. So, you know, it's, it's not as black and white as people try to make it. And anyone, you can polygraph me to this day. Anyone who wants to on air live, feel free, I'm ready. Let's do it. Because what you're saying is not

true. And that email that I tried to send, the email that they're referencing with, They can construct it in a certain way. But what I was writing was never, I'm going to release a video that I don't even have anymore, by the way, that I said that I was seeking to retrieve. But what am I going to do with it? I could have posted that damn thing the day I got it. I'm not that guy.

I'm not. You are. You had the video. You said a video I don't have, I had that don't have any more. So you had the video of incriminating shit, and you look like a guy who would incriminate somebody, you fucking piece of shit. And he's saying there's an email that they're saying that,

why would I do that? I don't know, for fucking money, you hunk of garbage? Nobody's going to try to commit suicide for no reason. Poor carrot top. I think of nothing else, it's probably going to be just a blow up of like he's in the gay stuff. That might shake his foundation for some reason. But when are people going to realize that being gay right now

is not a thing. Nobody cares. You could come out of the closet. No, but I can care about your side. Listen, if, uh, man, so funny, I had 80 thoughts at once when I just said that in my mind. All your gay thoughts?

No, I was going to say, I know it's just the idea that I was like, guys, actually I'm leaving, Christine, I'm actually, I'm in audience, but I'm like, I'm gay. I think everyone, I'm not that would be necessarily a bad or my life would go bad. No, we'd all go, we know. But everyone would be like,

Christine would be like, I, we, I, what do you think I'm here? I like gay guys. No, but everyone, I mean, That's news that would make everybody, like, for weeks, people are going to go, even when they forget, they're going to go, oh, that's why fucking Jay's came out, he's gay. No, we're not. We're all going to go finally. No.

We're all going to go. Work it, girl. If you came out once ago. Why would you say finally, because now you're going to try to go on the road with me? Yeah. He goes, finally, Jay's admitting he's gay. Now we can get to the bottom of it. Now we know why him and Josh are such good friends.

Josh, Bobby and Jay on the getting to the bottom of it tour. Oh, don't forget Adam Fenoyer. And he looks like a guy who does cruising in Connecticut. Oh, man. Yeah, dude. Honey, I got to go to the... I'm going to walk in the park again. We would be a wicked fucking gay forsoom. Oh, man, it would be fantastic.

We would dominate the Rosie O'Donnell Cruz, for sure. Oh, my God. Me, you, Fanoia, and fucking Josh. So what are the two... There is, I'm trying to get it. The articles are both in Florida, and they're behind paywalls. I'm trying to find a non-payal article. Florida charges for their news.

Josh would try to eat... Josh would be annoying trying to eat way too much cum. Oh, my God. Yeah. You got to visit it? You got to visit it? You got any of him, is there come on Jay's stomach? Because I'll take it because I love cum.

It's protein. My best is a good job. He goes, he goes, well, dude, I mean, yeah, there's, no one's going to have it. But, like, it's just, it's old cum at this point. He goes, oh, I heard old com's good come. Yeah. Come come. Come's come.

Get it in me. Get it in me often. Here it is, yeah. All right, 161.O.comic, a Florida native who's real name of Scott Thompson's accused of giving a 19-year-old man alcohol at his winter park home and engaging in a sexual conduct with the teen. Who is drunk? Does this bore you? It doesn't turn you on?

No. Who is drunk and unable to consent? Oh, 19-year-olds. I feel like a yon where you see somebody yawn. I wish you was 16. 19? He was drunk and, yeah, boring. Boring.

Drunk and unable consent at the time. Okay. But do you need consent with it? He's now 25, this guy. So it's two different things. So the other ones, the, it was filed, oh, it was filed in support of a lawsuit to the other person. that Brian Evans made.

But Brian Evans saying he didn't... So he's a Hallandale Beach musician, this Brian Evans guy. That was 19. Oh, no. Nope. This is Zachary. Zach DeFazio. Zach, what a great name.

He was 19 now. He's 25. But he was 19, but why is 19 illegal? Because you can't give, it's giving, um... Alcohol. Oh, it's the alcohol. Oh, it's the alcohol. You can't give...

Yeah. You got him boozed up and then plowed his butt or mouth or maybe none of those things at all. Not enough. I don't think it's as bad. I mean, it's obviously not as bad as like an underage person, but it's still underage for alcohol but you give him alcohol but you give like a monster drink you can ram his asshole without alcohol jacob if i got you jacob if i got you totally plastered and you found out something happened would you rather found that i fucked your mouth or your ass it's not it's it's a hundred

percent you know it's an easy question it's an easy question not not mouth i guess yeah i'm gonna finish in there though you're gonna wake up tasting it how's that feel you want no i don't you still want it in your mouth or you still are you wanting your ass now you want you in your You're not going to remember. It's going to be like an endoscopy. You want a jane your ass. Not an endoscopy. What is it called?

Colonoscopy. Well, you're giving them both, actually. Upper and lower. Yeah. You want an endoscopy or a colonoscopy? Either way I'm scoping you, bro. Jacob, you want Jane your ass first because you don't have to see him. And it's not going to hurt that much.

No, he said I'm not conscious. Yeah, he's out. He's out for the count. Oh, you're out? Well, he's like, he's drunk, so he's all whacked up. Yeah, you're going to take it in the ass. I'm going to know it. He's going to feel a little bit of pressure.

Whatever. A little tiny bit. You might gag a little from my when I fuck your face. You're going to feel it. You're going to feel a little bit. Oh, Christine went. I believe Christine. I'm not doing it.

I go in dry and fast. Christine's having flashbacks. Dry. No. And fast. Why? Why? Can I ask you a question?

I'm going face. If you had to pick one of us to get fucked by. No. Me or Jay, who is it? And by the way, if the answer is different for who you want to fuck your face or fuck your ass, I'll accept a mishmosh. You have to pick one of us.

One of us is going to fuck you. And none of it could be Black Lou. I feel like you're a size queen. I feel like you would pick Black Lou. No, that's why. Because I believe that you said Bobby's got the bigger penis. I never said a word of that ever in my life.

I believe Bobby said that. Well, I believe him. I don't think he's bragging. Bobby's only seen my penis in a terrified picture of when I was a fat child. Right after you got molested. Clearly his opinion has been tainted. Oh, you just realized I'm like,

did you not have chest hair when that picture was taken? I don't think you did. No, I did. I mean, just like, but not much more to have now. Now it's crazy when I'm walking around on my tank top and I catch a mirror and it's just like white hairs all coming up

over the top. I'm like, what is this? Who has this big, long, white chest hairs coming out of the top? Like, what a creep. That's that blue copper you've been taking. I don't take it. It hurts so much. We have to start being actual swingers now.

I'm definitely getting swingers tuft without a doubt. I'm definitely going to swear to I walk around. Yes, definitely there should be a... I'm going to start wearing a lot silk. I think I need to get a thinner chain for sure to kind of like knock around in the hairs. Yeah, you need with like a pendant that gets... Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's in there, yeah.

Maybe it's not really get Jewish star, like a small Jewish star. You should get a nice gold one. Star, yeah. Yeah. And your watch should be gold, too. Whatever watch you get should be gold. Yeah, I should really embrace Judaism more. You get a pinky ring?

I like everything you're saying. Jacob, answer the question. If you had to get plowed by one of us, and we're fucking you too. No, no, and yeah, it could be, I want you to know who you'd prefer for mouth, who you'd prefer for ass, if you'd be the same person for both, and if ultimately you'd prefer of all those things. what would be most what's the winner of the bracket would basically be who do you want to do any of these things to you yeah who would you prefer me or j i don't want to i'm unconscious you're gonna be unconscious well

i just have to be your spacey you're space you're space while it's happening you're kind of like is this happening it is what i do yeah but the next day you're going to know what happened yeah you're going to remember it because one of us will be in bed eating something and when there's blood and when you go shit blood also it's going to give you a little you're going to have an idea yeah it's not going to be a lot of blood yeah yeah when you have your morning when you have your morning cough and cum falls out of your mouth yeah and your morning shit is shit is blood I think those would be the test well which one would you choose I can't ask us out of the question I guess I'm going to it's going to be mouth for both of you but now I have to pick which one yep

we're both finishing in your right in your mouth yeah wait I thought I'm picking which one well either one I'm saying it's not like if you get Bobby he wants to decorate your face and I'm gonna finish in your mouth

for some reason I don't want this one to be nasty clean it plus I also I want you to come to and realize that what's in the back of your mouth is my a big fat batch of come I'm actually gonna hold your nose while I come in your mouth so none of it gets out no escaping yeah you're gonna have to swallow it

or you'll die now You can swallow it and eventually make it your cum. I don't think that's how cum works, but maybe... I think it is. It goes down. If you swallow Bobby's cum, one of your loads could be a Bobby's load. And if that's when you get somebody pregnant with, wouldn't that be weird? Well, let's not taint the fucking jury here. You're going to swallow our cum 100%, but which one would it be?

But you're not going to swallow it until you wake up. No, you're going to wake up and realize. Like a reflex, wake up and go... You're going to go, oh, that must be spit in my mouth. You go, you're going to swallow it. And you're going to be like, man, why was that so fucking... salty and bleaching. Yeah, you're going to have some white stuff in the corner of your mouth the next day, like Sherrod after a set. Yeah. But you're going to, you're going to, you're going to,

you're going to know. Come on, pick it. Which one? Here's my thought process. Go on. Show your work. Just because I know Bobby's, I'm unconscious and it's, it's reprehensible what you both of you are doing to me. It's terrible. Terrible. on some level I still you know because Bobby's a friend and I know he said he's not getting any

any sex so you're doing me a favor unconsciously yeah and Jay I know is is doing fine I don't have sex at all I can't believe that at all

there's no way I believe any of this he doesn't you and me yeah Not getting any. That's what you're telling me. Yes. No, that's impossible.

There's a person right behind you going, yes, he's not lying. Yeah. Plus, they told me, I know that the two of you are still swinging. Or that's what you told, that's what's been known. No. Like historically. You're going back. You're going years.

Years ago. Yeah, you're going years before his knees worked. And you went Jersey suburb. Yeah. Suburban. No. Christine went Jersey suburb. You're still.

And she also went Hell's Kitchen. wherever else we went where it stops happening. Well, then I... You'll be doing both of us a favor. Yeah, just know that both of us desperately want to finish inside of you. Technically, Jay is still single, and you're not going to cheat on Dawn. She's not going to find out, dude. She ain't going to find out about that.

Well, no, I'm going, well, I'm not going to be like that snitch. I would go to my grave. Yeah, you're not a snitch. No, I'd be, I want to die in shame without anyone known. You're going to extort a guy who had the fucking loving nature to bless, come inside your fucking sleeping mouth? I'm never going to extort you for money because no one in the public is going to find out. And then I have to wait for the next yomka for and then my sins are cleansed. It's going to take a while.

First of all, if it happened today, you have to wait a full year. First of all, the money you're going to extort, none of our gay sex stuff is worth anything on the open market. Well, you're a thousand heirs, you told me. If you said you have gay stuff with Jay, people are going to go, so what? Nobody's going to care. So what? He goes, yeah, join the club of people who have gay videos of Jay. Yeah.

And if I started Bobby, like, I think Dawn would just like, ugh, but she still sang in there. Let's put ourselves in the spot here of what happened to carrot top. He's saying he sent someone of some stuff. A video. I have, like, a little more info. But he sent someone a video of, like, him getting blown by a young person. I think, something like that. And it's like a...

So there was like video evidence of me. Forget a story even as a nightmare. But there was video evidence that like... And just no one knew that like I have like spread asshole fucking gay guys wailing on my ass on weekends. I would consider killing myself probably too because I'd be like it's so... You know what? I guess another thing. If I enjoyed that action, maybe I would just be more like...

But again, we're comics in a different way where you can kind of go to... like yeah look man I get down and I get weird on the weekend do you know I mean I guess you can make a prop he could just he could come out of a closet on his opening thing and I think something he's so I think his thing is just like a pogo stick with a dick on it he could do so much fun I think he just feels like it's 61 years old the world's gonna have a completely 180 view of him I think is what his fear I think that he has a family oriented show at the locksore and to be uh you know a sexual nobody knows people come I think in a lot of A lot of rednecks probably go to a show, a lot of right-wing people,

and that would affect his bottom line of people not like him. So I think it's time for you just to tell the world, dude, that you fucking, you do gay shit, aggressive gay shit on the weekends on the road and just let people know it now. Yeah. So people know. Oh, me? Yeah.

Yeah. Sometimes you fucking make, you make Danny watch you masturbate. Oh, God. I love it. That is gross. Danny. Sweating while he watches you. Oh, fucking.

He has a t-shirt. I feel he does this with his hair a lot, like pushes out of front of his face. He has a t-shirt that has pads in the armpit because he has a sweat problem. They're built-in. He has custom sweat t-shirts. I've seen these, I think.

It's a different material in the armpit, yeah, right? Makes me throw up. Why? I don't know. I don't like a sweaty armpit. I don't like a sweaty, hairy guy. Yeah, that's fair. Me either.

Yeah. I like my boy's hairless. If I had, if they caught video of me, If they had video of me If somebody was like I have video of you Fucking doing gay shit I would be like

Fucking let it out Dude I'd be so embarrassed Of a video of me Doing heterosexual sex With a gorgeous woman Because of my insecurity of me I couldn't imagine If also then he goes

Oh look at his tits jiggle While that guy plows his fucking Flat fabby ass Oh God There's nothing good about this And you know We'd wind up watching it on this show Of course

Christine Slow playback back a little more. Go back. I go, this is worse than that text of the war on drugs guy. Now you guys are going to watch me get my dick sucked by my opener. You have to invite Ari and Dan. There are a few things in this article

where the video that he has, like Carrot Top actually sent the guy the video and the guy was a musician that did open for him for a while. And apparently there was a settlement that also included future work for the Brian guy.

But he's basically saying that caused him a bunch of trauma. But this kid is saying, like, no, I was too drunk. He sent me a picture that wasn't his. I met him on Grindr. And then he was like fed alcohol. And I don't know. Surprise. It's Karatop.

The thing is scary about the stories. That's funny. He goes, I'm just a guy out here in Vegas. He goes, you want to come to my place? He goes, sure. Meet me at the top penthouse in the light of the Luxor. Is this Karatop? No.

Says he used his. You have to, you know, going from 19 to 25, you might think of it. Caratop comes out of a box. It looks like a jack in the box. Hey, his dick waggling out. If it's Chris Angel, you're meeting for Gaysay? He goes, meet me. There's a fifth dimensional portal at the top of the Luxor.

Take that. You will see me levitating in light. Start sucking my dick. That's the fantasy. Play along. Believe. Are you ready? Are you ready?

Yeah, I'm going to come. Are you ready? Oh, I want to try that with Don next time we fuck. Are you ready? Are you ready? Oh, he was on Grindr. Yeah, he's Grinder, man. It's mid-50s, though.

That was before he got... Now he's 61. He's different. He grew up. But if you go on grinder... If you go on grinder... Yeah. Right?

And you're trying to be incognito. But you have the balls to go on grinder. I know. I've gone... Every time I've gone on there, I want you guys to know. I thought I was getting a toasted sandwich. Which in Philadelphia, you will see, is, in fact, called a grinder. And I thought it was like slice.

You know what I mean? Like the pizza app, slice? Yeah. I thought it was for hot hoagies. Right. And then, you know, how many times did I have to fucking blow a guy? Because we misunderstood each other. Yeah, you're not a bad person.

You're coming over here for a grinder? I go, yeah. I'm going to take a steak grinder, actually. And he's like, yeah, you got it. I got all you can eat. And I was like, that's awesome. I just take the one sandwich. You want mayonnaise on your grinder?

And I was like, yeah, throw it on there. He's like, I'll throw it all over your face. He'd go, you're probably right, if you put too much mail on us, probably can get on my face. We had no idea with each other were talking about. And then he'd get there,

no sandwich, I gotta suck his dick. This makes no sense that he's trying to not come out of the, keep his gayness and he's on Grindr. His face is carrot top

and nobody else looks like him. He's obviously not putting carrot top on grinder. You think he's putting carrot top photo on grinder? He said he put an anonymous picture of a torso. You think he's using his headshot?

I'd rather not give my age, but I'm carrot top. No. He didn't know. who he was. Looking for hookups and meaningful conversation. That was, yeah,

but gay guys want to see the whole package. He's not a carrot top now. He's carrot bottom. Yeah, carrot bottom. That was funny. I mean, gay guys suck dick for glory holes.

What? I know. Tush. Tush. Yeah. Also, that's another perspective thing. I call them horror holes.

I never thought it goes, oh, glory be to God. A penis. A penis. Oh, someone else's penis in my stall. I call them portals. Glory.

And it was something that went on for months apparently so I guess he was like the poor guy's just gonna come out and go look I'm gay well hopefully hopefully it's like I'm gay and I killed you know hopefully it's not like oh I've killed no I'm gay and I killed a boy I'm gay and I tried to kill myself because of that and hopefully it like really is like and hopefully it's not like him realizing like oh all this stuff's going to come out about how I'm like raping past out boys he's got a long term beard I looked that up today what do you mean no wife I don't think but he's been with a chick for if you look they're like connected forever So do you.

Yeah, you're right. So do I. And I'm still active on Grindr. Me and you both have beards. I wonder if I can go, can you go on Grinder now? Can I get a Grindr account and put in Carat Top as my name? You know what we should do? We should go on Grindr and see who gets the more, the more guy, the most guys and the hottest guys.

We tried this on Skanks years ago and only Dave got responses. Really? Because he's a little twink. Because he's a twink. He's a beautiful twink. You're a bear bear bear. Yeah, but now. You know, maybe we get some better pictures out there.

Maybe some stuff where, here's what we should do. We should take pictures together, sexy pictures, and then blur the other one's faces out on the, do you get what I'm saying? Like, we'll see, we'll take the same style pictures. We get done up the same way. Yeah. But, like, in your picture, picture,

we'll blur my face. It's like your best picture happens to be one where you got to blur this guy out. Yeah, okay. Mine will be me with you blurred out on it, and we see how good we do. Why we just put our picture as Karatop and see how much guys? I like that.

Yeah, and say like just say everything but put quotes around it so it's supposed to be sexual, but it won't make sense. He goes, really into prop comedy. I'm a real pun guy, if you know what I mean. Yeah, this chick. Amanda Hogan. She's very pretty. Yeah, very cute. And she's with him on like red carpets constantly and all this stuff.

And he's also, he doesn't really talk about that too much. No. He might be. He might like both. Maybe. That's very possible, although I think that's always gay, but, you know. You think Bai's gay? Yeah, dude, but you know I'm mega fucking Christian.

Yeah, you're mega. Yeah, I'm mega church Christian. So I think it's not even a real thing. No, I don't know. Something about, I said, I feel the thing was, again, this is, I could just be wrong, and there's science different than this to prove it, I'm sure. Or if it was, I would just believe. You are the science.

I am the science. But I'm saying that I would be open to proof that this is completely wrong, but I think bisexuality, the reason it's like prevalent in girls so much. I think girls who are bisexual are either lesbians who are trying not to go full lesbian for their lifestyle, whatever their concerns are there. So they have money? Maybe. Yeah, not have to work and be the man of a relationship.

But, and they'll hook up with girls because I think it's just been plugged in for so long that like two girls are into each other and they're attractive especially. guys cheer. So it's like it's pure reactionary like things. So I think a lot of that bisexual is explained on the women like that. With guys I think it's like they're gay but they're really not

ready to be like I'm full on gay yet. But I said I'm not bisexual so I could be wrong. I'm gay. You heard it here first everybody. I'm gay. Do we have to go? Damn, I'm gay. We have to go. You're gonna hear you first. You fuck dude.

Splash. Splash announcement, everybody. gay. We'll see you guys tomorrow. We'll see you guys tomorrow. I got a 19 year old boy to go tell him to shut the fuck up. Don't start telling people, boy. Guys, please send Carrotop some nice messages. Or just, you know,

pictures of yourself. What we think. Send Carrotop videos to yourself jacking off and say it's from the bonfire. Say, hey, feel better, buddy. Wack off to this guy, wacking off. Yeah, send your wangs over from the bonfire. Send your dicks over to Caratop and say, from the bonfire, have one on us. No, suck it, bitch. Do me a favorite.

right bang on the side of your car. Yeah. And tell them, say, this one doesn't need to be drunk. You can just have it. I don't know why I thought. He actually used his face on Grindr. That's what I pictured. That's hilarious.

No. Not that face. Not that face. I'm going to use Jacob's face on my grinder page. Yeah, I don't mind that. So I like that. How about we take sexy pictures? I'll put fucking DJ Lou's face over me.

You put Jacobs. Perfect. So we'll see. No, you get away from me. Who gets more? Who gets more? Our bodies or their faces? We got to roll the dead. to see what the mixes and matches are.

I guess we could send fucking some kind of creature out there made up of Christine and Black Lou. I don't know what kind of fucking freaky fly thing that's going to be. Do you see this at it? The grinder activity spikes during the Republican National conventions?

I love that. That makes me laugh so hard. Oh my God. How funny is that? Just senators. Just gay Jesus lovers. I know. I'm like, oh my God. We're literally looking at you guys be hypocrites.

You want to pack another man's do-do. That's your business. We'll see you guys tomorrow. That's truth spill.