The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Bobby Buoy The Hero

Episode Date: January 13, 2026

Everyone is back from holiday break and Bobby has a whale of a story to tell. He vacationed in Costa Rico with his family and radio star Mike Calta. He was swimming on a private beach when a young girl summoned him to help her sister who drifted out to sea. Spoiler alert: Bobby was a hero and saved the woman from certain death! Find out why her pro-athlete father needed Bob to be the savior. Find out why his eyebrow is disturbingly out of whack. And why does Big Jay feel the need to make a sequel to "American History X" to help tell this complex tale? *To hear the full show to go www.siriusxm.com/bonfire to learn more! FOLLOW THE CREW ON SOCIAL MEDIA: @thebonfiresxm @louisjohnson @christinemevans @bigjayoakerson @robertkellylive @louwitzkee @jjbwolf Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of The Bonfire ad-free and a whole week early.  Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

And now, the bonfire with Big J. O'Kerson and Robert Kelly. You can take my breath away. Hardest part of making my post to let the world know that I'm a hero was picking the song. Other people say it. There was 100% you were in my head going, that one? Yeah. That one? You went basic bitch on it for sure.

Well, I went, I was going to go Bet Midler, of course. But that's wind beneath my wings. Which has hero in it. Did you ever know that you're my hero? The line, but I don't... No, that's more like... That's more like you're talking to someone who's dying, and you're telling them that...

Yeah, in the film Beaches. Well, in my... In the situation that I was in, somebody was close to it. Yeah? And I... Yeah, but I hear you. Yeah, I didn't go with that. I went with the foo fighters.

Well, Ben Midler's friend was white. What color was this person? Well, we'll get to it. I mean, it shouldn't matter, right? It was... No, it shouldn't. It doesn't. But it did?

No. Lives are on. Well, so. Did you Phil Collins a black kid? No. Did you say him drowning and did not lend a hand? No, no, no. Go-Gung, good-gun, good-gung, good-gum, so we were on this beach and Dawn comes back up.

And she's like, you know, I guess she got, there was a wave. The waves were huge, and I didn't know it on this beach. There's no surfers. So when you see that, that means it's, you know, it's a little, it's probably, you know, you shouldn't be max. Can we get aboard? I was like, no, there's nobody else here. They're not surfing, we're not doing it.

It must be something up. The undertow was pretty strong, too, at this beach. And the beach, the drop off, it went really shallow and deep real quick. This is exactly what happened to Malcolm Jamal Warner? It happened to him on the other side. But that was a... But Costa Rica. He was in a riptide, which kind of takes you out.

But it's the same thing. Undertoe is same thing. But usually when there's an undertow, they'll put signs up so you know that, you know, there's an undertow. This, just the under the, the, uh, the riptide, they'll put a riptide thing up, but the undertow. Every time you say riptide, I'm giving you that. You know the hang loose? Hang loose. Riptide.

So Dawn came up. She was kind of mad. I think she had a little thing with Max because he saw our bit, the waves were so big. He saw our wave come in and he just let it hit her. And she, she basically got fucking raped by a wave. It just took her. Max watched this. He, he was, thought it was funny.

And she got mad. You know, she was, you should have told me the waves. Whatever, stupid shit. And she was like, I felt bad. I shouldn't have did that. So I was like, I'll go play with Max. I'll go in the water. Yeah, she kind of gave him a little shit for not letting her know big wave was coming.

And I would have laughed myself. I think it's hilarious when someone gets fucking swapped by a wave. Dude, nothing better than a hot chick getting her shit kicked by a wave. Nothing better than a middle-aged dumpy chick getting whapped by a wave, too. Whapped? So Max is out there swimming by himself. So I went out. Me and Max are messing around.

There's like two, there's little waves and then there's the bigger waves behind those, right? I hear those, I can hear those. So we were messing around a little bit, trying to, you know, body surf a little bit. Just doing, you know, stupid shit, throwing each other in the water, trying to joke around. All of a sudden, I hear, I see this little girl

swimming frantically back to shore and she's like... Wait a second. Is this before or after you and your family robbed a bank dressed as former presidents? No, this was after. Okay. Yeah. So you guys already got your adrenaline junkie rush.

I just woke up for the lizard. Okay. So this is right after that. I was tuck it out from all that hijinks. Okay. So. That was your point break. So I see this little girl kind of panicking, screaming, help her, help her pointing out to the ocean.

And I look out past the waves and there's this girl kind of just with her head above the water. Mm-hmm. And I looked around and nobody, there was nobody. Did you yell turd in the punch bowl? Did you? Because that would have been funny. Bobby? Over here.

Did you yell? I did not yell that. Turned the punch bowl. I said. I looked around for anybody else, but there was nobody else around. Did you go next to her sister and start screaming, turd in the punch bowl? Because you should have.

You should have. No one would believe it if she told us. No, he did. So, you know, I looked out and there was nobody else. There was nobody else in the water. So I just swam out to him. She was flailing. No, dude.

It was worse. I swam out to her and I got to her around three feet out. I just, she was her. Three feet out. What do you mean? Three feet away from her. Okay. When I got around three feet away from her because I was a lifeguard a long time ago.

And, you know, the one thing that they teach you, if you were ever going to go near somebody and say, somebody you can't just go right up to them they'll grab you and they'll try to use you as a float so as soon as I got to her I saw her dude I don't know if you ever seen you said don't touch me terror she was terrified like she must have been out there for a minute because she was up to her chin and she was trying to just stay afloat more she's black and her hair's about to get wet knuckle me knuckle me lute you know sister don't want to get her hair wet so I said to her I go listen, you can't, she went immediately

to kind of get me, to grab me, to come to me. And I was like, you can't grab me. Hang on, turd. I didn't say that. Oh. I said, you can't grab me. If you grab me, we're both going to die. And she wasn't even speaking. She was just pure, terrified. So I go, I need you just stick your hand out.

Put your hand out. I'm going to grab your hand, and then I'm going to start swimming in. And when I start to swim in, I need you to start kicking with me. We're both going to just kick. I need you to just relax. She was stuck because of the current. The current had her. Carnot was pulling us both out at this time.

Okay. And I go, we just got to start kicking together. So I grabbed her hand. She started kicking. I started side stroking in kicking. But it was, I mean, it was a tough current. Like, we were going an inch at a time. And I'm just waiting for somebody else to help.

Are you going sideways the thing? I didn't go sideways because it wasn't like a rip current. It was just an undertow that was kind of pulling us out. I probably should have went sideways anyways. Sorry. Everybody knows. Jay, every time he approves to something, he gives me the hang loose sign.

Whatever you see, Rip Tide. What's up? So, uh, I want to be saying. So, uh, we were coming in. I just kept talking to her. I'm like, listen, you know, you're doing great. Just keep kicking. We're just going to kick our way in.

You know, you're doing fantastic. We're just going to keep moving. I go, you know, and I was just talking to her. And as we were getting in, that's when her father saw what was happening. I think her little sister finally went up and told her dad that something was going bad. Oh, so she's calling for you. So at this point, dude, I was tuckered out, man. Like, I was really fucking tired.

And when I saw her father coming out, I was like, this is great. But he came, he's a big dude. He's like six, five, six six. He's black. He can't swim. He comes running out. And, like, like, he's a big dude. Like I said, it just drops off.

He came out, reached out for a hand, but he went under. So he had to go back because I don't know if he could swim. Yeah. And he let go. And now it's just me and her again. I was like, fuck. Like, I started a little. Don't let my baby's hair get wet.

Just vanishes into the sea. Keep my baby's hair dry. I mean, I just felt so bad. Like, her face was so terrified. Sit my fantasy basketball picks. And when he went back in, that's when I got nervous because I wasn't really making any headway at this point. We would just keep getting.

I'd get a couple inches and then we'd get sucked back. I'd make a couple inches and then we'd get sucked back. So we were literally... We're talking about water, everybody, if you're just joining us. Sound right. And so then another guy came out and her father came out again and the Spanish guy came out, little chubby Spanish guy came out. And that's when he kind of grabbed her other arm.

But I was, he grabbed her, but I was like, hey man, and like took her away, started taking her in. I was like, I may need you help too, bro. I don't know if I can get back in at this point. I was so wiped out. And I was getting sucked back. And he just, they just took her in. Yeah.

And kind of forgot about me. Nice. And in my brain, I'm like, I'm, I just got to, I got to fucking do it. Like, Max, Don, sorry about the shitty presence. You know what it was? As soon as I got to her, I was like, dude, I don't want to, like, when I saw her face, like, I've never seen somebody that terrified. And we were, we were so deep and far out.

I was like, I can't, like, I don't want to die in front of my kid. And this is, like, it's a real thing. Like I don't want to die in front of my wife and kid trying to help this girl out, but I don't want to let her die. It's like it was a weird. Sophie's choice. It was a tough thing to do. And when we were coming back in, it really got freaky to me because when I was, as I was getting more tired, I was like, I fucking, I got to make it back in. I can't.

I got to get back in. So they took her in and I just kind of stuck my head in the water and just started swimming as much as I could. and then I get my tippy toes down. Once I got my tippy toes down, I was like, fuck. And then I just kind of let this wave kind of take me forward. And then I just went up on the beach and fucking dawn. She's like roll over as soon as you get on the beach, flop over. No.

I went up to my towel. I sat down and the guy came over, the father came over and just held me. You know, just grabbed me. This big dude just grabbed me. He's like, I want to thank you so much. I can't, you know, I'm so, you know. And then she came over and held me. I looked over Dawn and she was crying.

Do you mean hugged you? Yeah, he hugged me. You keep saying held me is a weird way to put it. Because it was more than a hug, you know what I mean? Like, there was like a motion to it. You know what I mean? Like, when he grabbed me, he held me. Like, you just saved my fucking daughter's life, bro.

And it was definitely more than a hug. Now you're going to get one half of her WMBA money. $23,000. a year. My man, you just got yourself half of her WMBA contract. Well, $23,000. I was like, fucking, I can't believe I just save somebody's life. I look over at dawn and she's crying.

And she's like, if you... Bobby, you're saying? I'm sorry. Yes. You saw different looking people's eyes for the rest of the week. It's called Island Respect. It's not, it's not iron respect. It's more of...

How were you able to not get pulled out by the current, but that little girl did? Is the current racist? Black Lou, Google that. Is the current racist? It killed Malcolm Jamar Warner, but it spared you. I don't think, I didn't think she could swim as strong. You know what I mean?

I think what happened is she was having a good time, got sucked out, and was treading water for too long, where she couldn't, she couldn't, you know, I can swim a little bit. I swam out to her. You don't know. You don't keep showing me with your arms, I know. But I could swim.

She probably didn't realize she wasn't getting anywhere when she was swimming. Yeah, it's like, you can swim and swim and swim and, just stay in the same spot. Christine, I don't even know what you're talking about with your arms not moving when you're saying swimming. Swimming how? You know I use my arms when I talk. I don't know what the hell that was. She's doing. That's some kind of a crazy thing.

This is swimming. This is swimming. I head to the side each time. I was swimming. Head to the side each time. Swimming. I go to one side. I go underwater and then one side.

You're also not taking full swipes like. you should. No, I'm doing this and like that. No, you're just dancing like groove is in the heart. I'm not, I'm not fucking Michael Stelts. I'm Bob Kelly's swimming. Yeah, but Dawn was, I mean, she was losing a shit because she was like, if we didn't come here, if I wasn't there, no joke,

if me and Max weren't in the water at that time, she's dead. She died. Just another black girl lost to the sea. I mean, 100% would have died. There's no way, because your father wouldn't have been able to go out there and got her, and there was nobody around. like in the area.

Damn. And she was about to go down. Like when I got to her, she was like up to her mouth and her legs, she wasn't even really moving. Yeah. She was about to just say,

fuck it. How old was she? She'd be like 13, 14, 15 around there. She was, uh, but the funny, so we, they left immediately. We were like,

let's get the fuck out of here. We went to some other safer beach, uh, Playa Grande that was awesome. And then the next day we were at the airport and they were on the flight to Atlanta.

We had to go to Atlanta to come back to JFK from Costa Rica, and they were on it. And I walked up to him, and I talked to him. He's an ex-NFL player for Atlanta. Falcons. He's retired.

His name's right there. I'll look up his hands. Junior Guntham, I think it is. Great guy. Is he a guntham? I forget his last name. He's sweet. I mean, the nicest guy I've ever met.

So sweet. Mother was great. She came up. The daughter came up, the sweetest family I've ever met. They were so grateful and happy. Did you touch four of all of them and go? Learn how to swim, idiots. Before you plan a sea-surrounded adventure with your family,

learn how to swim, everybody. He told me, he goes, I kept telling the girls, don't swim out too far. Don't go out past the waves. He kept yelling at, you know, these, bitches, don't listen. Thank God this white motherfucker was there to stay-mouth kids. ass.

What's he saying? Maybe he's talking about me. No, it's from 2020. God damn it. You never mentioned it again. It's kind of weird. It didn't stick with him at all. You asked for this picture.

And he was like, oh, all right. You asked for that picture. No, his wife took that picture. Because you made her. Bobby? Bobby, Christine, please. Bobby? You asked me to take that picture.

No, she asked to take the picture. With her hero. With her hero. And her hero. and are here and well Max just kind of sweet Max just jumped in he doesn't deserve to be there

to be honest with you he does that at my shows too which kind of annoys me Who was it? He jumped in every picture Yeah dude It's like dude You know come on beat it

I mean My old pose too I like give you peace Yeah we did comics come home And I think I heard Larry go Why is he in the picture Damn it's a black father Lou How much would it hurt to see a

A fucking white man Come save your child Especially since I pay for those swim classes Would suck You think it sucks dude. That would suck. I mean, it was crazy, Lou.

That's some serious stuff. What was it like doing that in front of your son? How did that affect you? No joke. When I got to her, I was like, when I felt how deep we were and how much the current was, and I was like, what am I, I, I literally was like, what the fuck am I doing? Like, that went through my head. My family's here.

I'm not a swimmer. I'm not, like, you know, I shouldn't be doing it. Like, I was like, I shouldn't be doing this. You should have left at the fucking tarantula. But anyway, we're here. Dot, dot, dot. We're here now. Too late to worry about that.

The Marlin, the blah, blah, blah, the zip line. Now we're here. You should have left to the spider. Day one spider. You should have left. Don't forget the lizard. Oh, the lizard. Wait, Bobby, is this video?

This is seconds after this happened? So I, I, sex. And yes, this is seconds after having that. Bobby, why do you have an eyebrow like fucking? That's my lucky eyebrows here. Donna Taylor in one battle after another. That's my lucky eyebrow. I never plucked that.

Can you mad it down? I just save somebody, Jay. I know, but can you not make it everybody else's problem? Buddy, when I go to dinner, I mad it down. But when I go to dinner? I just saved a life. Not on stage? I know.

And you were looking at yourself into a camera. Didn't you know that your fucking eyebrow was going up to the middle of your forehead? Dude, that one eyebrow has saved her life. That's where all my power lies. in that eyebrow hair. That's your Samson? Dude, this is my Samson, dude. It's down now.

I know. For the show, I take it down. But when I, I can't control it, I just swam out into a rip tide. By the way, it looks like, did you get your eyebrows done since then? I don't get my eyebrows done. I've never had my eyebrows done.

They're just wet and thick. In that shot, yeah. Yeah, that's what it is. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I was just in the, you know, the ocean, saving people. Yeah.

We know. Jacob, whatever. Be sick. You're like the Coast Guard. Dude, honest to God, though, that did run through my head is that this is the dumbest thing.

I shouldn't, because my son, if I go down, if nobody saves me, I'm fucked or I'm going to have, I mean, I have to let this girl die, or we're both going to die.

The pressure's on the girl now. She has, now every day is a gift. She has to become something fucking amazing or else you're heroic for nothing. What if she becomes a serial killer? That's what you saved. That's,

that's, I mean, a black girl. Are you a hero? A black female serial killer. It's going to happen. At some point. It's not going to happen with her. Why, you don't believe a black woman would do the same thing that a man could do? Wow, dude.

Wow. That's taken into play. Okay, dude. No, it's fine. That's how you feel. It was, it was terrifying. You saved her and you were like, go have teenage babies now. Because, you know, my son is, like, Max is just watching me do this, and he can't, I mean,

fuck, dude, if I died in front of him, that would suck. Or even letting somebody die. He watches his father die saving a black chick, American History X part two. Elevator pitch. Elevator pitch. White son watches his father die, saving black child becomes racist.

American X3X, part two. So you had nothing, there was nothing in you that was like, I look badass right now, or I look awesome right now. It was just a fear of like, if I die, he's going to watch me die. Well, when I first saw her, I was like, nobody was going out together

and I saw her just head bobbing. I was like, I just swam out. And then when I got there, I'm like, what the fuck am I doing? And then when she went to grab me, I was like, this is terrifying. You know what I mean? Because if she grabs me and tries, I'm going to have to fucking... She didn't have your little lifeguard, baby.

Can I ask you a question about this? Can I ask you a question about this? Yeah. Do you think it should be American History X and then the number two? Because if you just do American History X with like I-I, it's going to look like American History X. History 12.

Hmm. I think the number two. American History X2, but the two has got to be going like through the whole thing. Why don't you use the word T-W-O? It's too much. You put the Roman numeral two, like in the middle

in the back or something. How about two? Yes, maybe the Roman numeral two behind it. Behind it looks good. Yeah, like pillars. Yes. Yeah, but me on top of the pillars. You're on top of the pillars. Yeah, yeah, yeah. With the eyebrow. With the eyebrow going nuts. shirtless and like and like you're gonna be covering but it'll still be visible part of a swastick fuck it they're not gonna know oh wait no you're not the racist it's no it's Matt this is the story of does Max become a crazy racist because he washes dad he somehow blames his black family for not

being able to swim and that's his big cause he's not even worried about like uh the welfare or any of stuff he just goes these motherfuckers don't learn how to swim and then a bunch of good white men die saving their kids he becomes he becomes a lifeguard in a black pool in in Harlem. Yes. And he, the ones that don't learn how to swim, he kills. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

He's like, you got to learn, you got to want it. You got to want it more than this, sis. Yeah, like, motherfucker, whatever. And he's like, oh, whatever. And then later that night. But that would be a funny flip-flot. Remember how the skinheads beat the black guys in basketball for the courts? It'll be really funny if black people beat skinheads and swimming for the local pool.

This movie's writing itself. Americanist 312 I felt bad for the dad more than anything after because, you know, when he ran out Yeah, but he was racist too. Remember the thing he said, the racist thing to the son? No, I'm talking about the dad, this girl's dad. I'm talking about part two.

It was, oh, my bad. It was the dad's fault of American Street, part one. Well, I feel bad that he came out and couldn't just come out and swim out and get her. All that professional athletics, all that dick. Two extra ankles in his, two extra bones in his ankle. Jesus Christ. Two extra bones in his ankle

Son of a bitch couldn't swim Damn fucking pussy I didn't say that Jacob You didn't take it up with him He took it up with him I don't think he's a pussy at all I think he's so much of him not pussy That if I had a problem with me

I would immediately run to a body of water Just dive in the boat All white people have to do Is live near the ocean Or a lake Yeah What are you gonna do about it You big black motherfucker

Is that one Cannonball! Is that why white people got pools? In case the race wherever stirs up. Where am I going to be? In the middle of my freshly deepened pool. 12 foot to 16 foot pool. Dude, I'm going to act like my pool's deeper in it.

I can't be standing in my pool. You just start waiting. Oh, my God. You're going to have to go to the end and just go on your knees in your pool. This guy's two feet taller than my pool. He'll kill me in my pool. They're going to come get you and you're going to go in the pool. They're going to stop.

And then one guy's going to go, you know, man, come here. That pools only four feet deep. Oh, shit, what? So the dad couldn't swim, but could the guys with him swim? I don't. Why would he not, I just don't understand why he wouldn't go out if he could. I didn't know. He's a scholar.

He's an athlete. I didn't know it, and he didn't know it that it drops off. So the beach literally went from shallow to deep real fast. Yeah. All the other beaches kind of went out slowly. You know, it wasn't this drop-off. So I think when he ran out and then he just went kind of down and when he was, he panicked too, which I just.

He needs the exes and the O's. He's a former NFL guy. I didn't know it was that way either because I was in the shallow part with Max just messing around and when I swam out to her I realized how deep it was which fucked me up. I mean I feel bad for him because he was

like panicking. She was just in shock. And the guys that came out on the beach, they weren't like there's no lifeguards there. There were just other two It was all local people and nobody really saw it because nobody was there was families like up on the beach but nobody she didn't scream. She wasn't screaming

the little girl just said help her twice and I swam out to her so nobody knew Was her sister said help her? Like Dawn didn't even know No her sister was younger than her She couldn't swim in no no she's the one who yelled help her The little sister was coming in yelling help Looking at me going help

You're asking you keep saying sister and I think her The girl who's drowning Are you thinking I'm talking about black lady sister Yes No I'm talking about sister Her sister actual human sister Hard E R got it yeah sister But my Boston axe is fucking you up

I get it sister you're her sister because you're going I'm going her sister and you go her sister's younger there I go but that's the one who was yelling at me to get her you go her sister yeah her sister I know it's my accent sister her sister I'm picturing to be six years old but she was like shirley ralph yeah nobody was around though the Spanish guy that came out was the guy that helped her but then he he kind of left me which bum me because I was I said to him I go hey bro I go I might need your help too learn that to help yourself Gordo And, yeah, dude, I, you don't understand how fucked up swimming is.

That was a pretty good Costa Rican accent, though, right? It was more Puerto Rican, but I like it. No, no, it was good. Let me hear it again. Give me a line to say again. What was my line? Learn how to help yourself, Gordo. Learn how to help yourself, Gordo.

It's more Mexican. I won't be here on a time, son. Yeah, that's Cholo. That's Cholo. Hey, bro. Nope, you got to switch it up. All right, now's a little more Puerto Rican. Hey.

Nope, you got to get the. Oh, lay. Bring your mouth. You're going down with your mouth. Go up. You're swimming, loco. No, that's still Cholo. You're loco swimming. Like this, it quicker. My daughters, it's quicker.

My daughters drowning out there. Help yourself, Cholo. And help yourself. Help yourself. Do what you gotta fucking do, fucker? That's still fucking Cheech and Chong. I was just speaking Costa Rica. No, that's not Costa Rica.

That wasn't? No. Fucker? Yeah, crazy. Crazy. Crazy, crazy. Fucker. Crazy. And then...

Crazy, local. And then, so, you know, after that, I mean, it was bummed out too because Max didn't even, like... He wasn't even like, Dawn was crying and he was like, what's up? What are we going to do? Yeah, what's next? I'm hungry. He is racist. Honestly, there could have been scary for him and he was trying not to be emotional.

I don't think so. I don't know. He's prepared to watch you. He was like, Dad, I was going to take over the household. But welcome back. I actually told him and Don I would like to be... referred to as hero for the rest of the trip. Okay.

Until at least Sunday. Did they? And he was like, Dawn did. Max was like, all right, enough with the hero. Enough with it. Enough with the hero. So maybe next time I see if he drowns and see who goes and saves him.

See if a black die, I'll come save him. What? Even out the world. You have to even out the world. Throw Max into heavy undercurrent waters and then yell for any black guy to help you. Like, Lou, you'd go out and help a girl, wouldn't you? No, hell, no, he wouldn't.

I can't swim like that. You can't swim? No, I'll die. What if your kid was out there? I'll put on a, what was that? Swip the vest. What if you don't have a vest? We're going to both die then.

So you're going to go die with him? Yeah, absolutely, I'll do that. You pray for a Bobby Kelly to come along. You can just take swim lessons. It's not too late. Yeah, but with a current or a riptide, that's like advanced swim shit like that. No, it's not advanced. It's not advanced.

It's not a riptie. Not yes, but undertone. I don't know what the numbers, the real percentages of others are, but I'd say Bobby, actually, when we cut through the funny of it, it was probably extraordinarily dangerous what he did, and probably, who knows what a coin flips chance that was that him and that girl didn't come back or they got back. I have no idea.

Well, Dan was telling me that you and him got in Hawaii. You got into it. No, I don't know. I was in Florida. You got into a ripped heavy current. Yeah, whatever it was, we just were laughing and jumping in the waves and stuff for a while, and then we just realized we go, oh, we're kind of far out. past the whatever there was like a little like pier that went out like oh we're a little past that and we just started trying to go back and I'm like hmm having a little bit of hard time getting back

yeah and then us both panicking while trying to keep laughing and not be like it's like this is gonna be funny when we get back but like in both of us inside are definitely going like ah shit dude I'm actually having like a hard like like I don't know how much longer I can like fight this hard through it's difficult yeah I had the same thing I was pumping so hard that like I probably could have touched my feet to the ground like I probably could have touched my feet to earlier than I did. I was just like semi-panicking enough that I was like still kicking my feet and then I finally put him like down below me and I was like oh shit I almost like stand up

by the time I yeah that moment of like oh I might have fucked up yeah there's not much I could do about it yeah that hit me two times when I got to her and then when I was trying to get her back in I was like I might have fucked up on this one and like I don't do you let her go I don't know do I let her go and just try to get back in I get I you know what I mean It's like you can't. I mean, I mean. I'm going to call you Bowie Kelly. The human booey.

But you were able to get her in. Bobby the Bowie Kelly. Well, I got her, I got her. You're Bobby Bowie. I got her far enough in to where they that. People could help. Yeah. Where they could.

I got her farther enough in where they could get her and stand up on their tippy toes and grab her. Bobby Bowie. With the sister being like, how original. Closer and when they took her, I got sucked out again. And I kept, you know what I mean? So I was, I was like, that's when I was told the.

Dude, I wish my duelingo paid off because I was like, yo, I need your help. And he was just, he just ignored me. What'd you say? Let you go? It's still, okay. It's not even close. I got stuck in one in a lake this summer and I'd never been in a lake current.

It doesn't exist. It was crazy. A lake kind? Yeah. What? There was something going on with a lake and it was like, it was like being pulled under in the ocean. It was wild.

He had a waking nightmare. How did it? No, it's in Trinity in California. How do you, I'm just, I'm not attacking. you. I'm just saying I've never heard of a wake undertow like a lake one. Maybe something with the way the river connects and it's manmade.

I don't know what the hell was going to be. So you were going to get you're going to just pulled into a river? No, we were like on a boat docked in the middle of the lake. How big was the lake? Pretty big. Could you see the other side? Yeah. I was going you could see the. The next thing that I would have hit was Antarctica.

When you dragged out? Yeah. When we getting dragged out, the next body of land was Antarctica. Oh, maybe Hawaii. Yeah. Oh, that'd have been fun. That would have sucked. Have you just turned up? If I just showed up on the endocratia? It's a big beard.

You're goofy, weird hair growth. I don't know if there's a... Your head hair growth all strange. I'm actually a king because of my eyebrow. You combing it over. You have your eyebrow combed over your head hair. The thing is, that's the thing that keeps me afloat is my lucky eyebrow. I use it for fishing. I actually catch fish.

I just tie a bow. bookered to the end of it and I keep catching tuna. Damn, that eyebrows big. That eyebrow is big. That's a hell of a story, man. That's wild. Yeah, it's, it was pretty great. Unfortunately, it's all fake and here's the prune.

That's funny. It sounds like a beginning of a good, like a YouTube video. However, all of that is fake. Somebody posted, maybe this is him telling a real story for once. Somebody commented, did Seton Smith come and save the day? Satan Smith, I still got to take him out to dinner. No, you didn't. You just saved the black girl, dude.

World's equal now. That's right. That's exactly right. It's it, dude. It's just back and forth black people and white people saving each other, and then therefore making equilibrium. And that's how the world becomes a better place. That's how the world becomes one.

That's right. Do you guys not listen to that John Lennon's song? Those are the lyrics in there. Do you want to hear the Bobby? Oh, I was going to say, do you want to hear the song by John? I would love to hear the song by John Lidda. Imagine all the people learning to finally swim.

Oh, you want to play the... This is right after it happened a little bit, a little bit after it. Okay. Yeah, it's pretty... I did this for the show, by the way. This is for you guys. So we're on the beach. This girl was drowning.

This is why Daniel Cormier says he doesn't want to interview fighters right after a fight. Dawn's still so shocked. She's talking to nobody. She just goes, he did. He really, really did. Yeah. She was crying before this. She was all fucked up.

Well, that was mainly because you're making her stay. I can only guess that behind you as some kind of a rusty hut. Yeah, it was definitely a local beach. It's not Playa Grande, which was beautiful. I have a photo. Show the other beach, the beautiful photo of the beach. But if you believe in God, he put you on that beach.

Well, that's what she said. Who, the black girl? No, of course. No, Don. That's always what they're going to say. And Don doesn't believe in God either. She's not like a she was like God she was when she was crying she's like God We weren't supposed to be here and God put you here today to save that girl's life

You guys should go so in two years you do like a fucking or one year You go how has your life been visit trip to her and then I want you to go to black church with them with that family I want to call you out and beg like this man right here Yeah we went to save sister in Italian's life I just named her that's the beach we went to after which was fucking beautiful Who's tatted up foot is that, Dawn? That's Dawn, yeah, she got some tats. I know Dawn was like a rock slut.

She got rock slut tat, yeah, she got caught on her feet. She did back in the day. I didn't know that, dude. Yeah. I know she was giving fucking BJs to get backstage and new kids. Yeah. Yeah, me and Dawn had, well, it's Boston. That's what you do.

You blow a guy to get backstage to new kids. Me and Don rekindled a little sexiness out in Costa Rica. Really? Oh, yeah. Good. Well, because. Well, she did. If you don't keep your genitals filled and covered, it's going to get AIDS down there for sure.

It's in the air. It's in the current. Yeah, we had a, we had a, we had a good trip. Nice trip. Nice trip. You banged in a hut next to Max? No, no, no. That we rented like a $2 million house.

The house, yeah, the house we, yeah, the house, you would have loved this, fuck it. It was 100% Chris. He banged while and Calta's were there? We had a day, look at that, look at that fucking house, man. You would love this house. This is a Christine and Jay, Airbnb, if ever saw one. I mean, it's crazy. We had that, that was the lady that cooked breakfast every day.

We had four bedrooms. Oh, you got a slave? No, she was called the house mom. Was that the problem? Was she too busy slaving over your dinner that she couldn't save her daughter on that beach? She's the only one who did know how to swim, but someone's got to earn money for the family now that dad's retired from football. Is any of this right? None of it's right.

Did I get any of that right? He did. He really did save somebody. Let me see, let me see. That's my favorite part of this now. Don, tell him I saved somebody. He did, he really, you're just talking to Novi. You're talking to a camera.

Okay, okay. Go back again at the beginning. Bobby's face is beginning or like either. He's like, say, yeah, another day in the grind. Well, as a hero. Yeah, you're wearing hero. I mean, dude, it's not a wearing it. It's not, you don't wear hero, Jay.

Let me just, because you're not a hero. Apologies, true. It's in you. Yeah. And it comes out almost like an X-Men power. You know what I mean? Where, you know, when Deadpool, they had to, like, really, fuck with him to have his power come out.

I had to be put in this situation for my power to come out. My hero. Yeah, I don't have that in me. Hang on one second. One more verse. Oh, this was... When I was swimming back in,

this was the song that was in my head. Slow-mo. Your titty's bouncing like fucking Pam Anderson to the ABA. I had my arm. I started slowly whispering this tour as we were coming to bay. Not this part, but the part before. This was scared her.

She was freaking out and you're going like, they'll be talking about this for the next 10 years, dude. Actually, when you save somebody's life, it goes away pretty quick. Yeah. They just move on. Yeah, Dawn, around 20 minutes later, she's like, do you want to get a Ah, Said ball? I was like, I just save somebody. You still want to talk about it more? And she's like, yeah.

I wanted to talk about his first face. He goes, yeah, another day in the life for hero. Yeah. He did, he just saved somebody's life. I went over I swam out Yo, kick Somebody kick your fucking phone

out of your hand This is for the show I got this for the show Oh this wasn't posted No I didn't post this Oh wow you didn't No I posted this right here for you No

This didn't go right away This didn't go right away This didn't go up On a story? No No Bobby This didn't go on a story Has it been on social media yet

Bobby Give me your archives Has this video been on social media yet Because I think this one The story 73 times where you got to the bonfire. I've been on Joe Rogan twice. I bet. Actually, the Rogan episode's coming out tomorrow.

It's a two-part series. It's called Hero. Hero. Hero. Well, it's like a hero, because he's actually a hero, too. He saved somebody's life. Did he? I bet Alan has some thoughts on how fast you posted this video.

I've been out to some real thoughts. No, my archives. It's my archives. There's only two. No, archives is everything What? Archives right there Archives

Look, archives And it's not your archives It says archives That's a different thing You're also a whole different thing You're trying to flim flam us Bobby you're showing us On a cell phone

15 feet away from us I know how to find archives on Instagram I don't want you to touch my phone Yeah I bet you don't What's in there Come over here Come over here Paid actors

Find my archives That's it You know Bobby Those were crisis actors That girl's a crisis actor Alex Jones is right about you. You hired crisis actors to reenact this fucking scene right here.

You got an out of work down on his luck fucking retired football player and you had his daughter go out there and fake fucking getting killed by the sea so you can save her. Listen, what this thing did to me more than being a hero... Her name's a young girl. She's a young girl. It's not a thing.

It humbled me. It made me grateful. So if you... Did it? Yes, it did. It didn't feel it. It's not the vibe I'm getting up. If you... This is in the Bible, I'm getting like, Don, tell me I just save somebody. If you, if you, if you need to go down that route, because I'm a, I'm a different person now, I'm a, and when you have, when that's in you, you look at things differently. You understand?

I don't have heroics in me. No, you don't. No, you don't. If Christine was drowning, what would you do? I go, whew. I go, they'll never turn this, pinn this on me. I go, oh my God, I was going to kill her, like, in two months. Oh, that saves me some fucking legwork.

Have I saw Christine drowning? I'd go get her. I'd had to swim. You'd go get her? Yeah. If she was drowning out in her in an undertow? Oh, if it was like, if I saw her being, like, yanked away? Yeah.

No, no, no. I thought that was, she was being returned to the sea. She always says she misses it back where she's from. It's a beautiful place where else. They were returning her to the sea. I do miss the sea. Yeah. She needs to return to it.

By the way, Bobby, 100% on social. Maybe. Listen, the thing is, you can't prove it unless you get my phone. She just proved it. No, she didn't. She just said it. Well, I have a tax that says definitely on social. That's the video I told you about.

Who's the text from? Big Jim. Big Jim. Who's Big Jim? Oh, you mean our boss? Our boss. He follows me? How long have you been going?

No, he listens to the show. He's listening to us. It was not on social. This video was discussed. No, this video is not as far as, you know, and it can prove. Give me. Give me your phone. No, you come over. You come over here.

We have a couple minutes. Show's over. I'm going to let this play. I'm sorry. It shows over. No, I'm going to let this play. No, well, shows over, and we have to go on with the story's done. I'm a hero. I save somebody's life. The story's over, and let's just move on and know that this girl's safe with her family because of my heroics.

Doesn't matter what the story is the social media. She would be just as safe if you didn't post the entire story. five seconds after it happened. If you don't, if you don't let the world know, I inspired other people to help people. I'm going to tell you something. Other people are going to be watching on the beach. Other people are going to be like, hey, if he can do it, I can do it. And I inspired people to make sure that, you know what, you may not think you're a hero, but everybody has hero in them. Could tell you this, though? If I didn't post that, that wouldn't be out there. Can I tell you this?

Yeah. You could have posted it five minutes from now. Yeah. It would have gotten more traction now. And also... I'm going to post it right now. He's reposting. Five seconds.

From his archives. Also... How did you get to archives? Can I say this, Bobby? Yeah. You took a little time with it. Yeah. You took a little time with yourself with the story.

Yeah. You could have punched it a little bit. Yeah. I did... It was so sincere. It was very sincere. You could have made... Well, it was a little...

Bobby, you could have made the attack. It was so sincere. Bobby. Let me take something. You could have made the story of just the drowning and the saving been the entire show today. We did. No.

We pretty much did. No, no, no. First hour was mostly fucking wild raccoons. A sloth, a monkey, cowth of falling asleep. Marlin. You catching a Marlin that you didn't really bring in the boat. You don't even want it, you said when you were done. Remember you had the Marlin?

You were like, I don't want it. Jim is always bitching about context. I needed to give as much context as I can. could. So that was for Jim all this context. Bobby, I have a question. After it? Yeah. After it happened.

I'm sorry, Christine. Wait, no, did you go around? Oh, unfortunately, the shows. Yeah, I'm going to be on the road. You're on the road. Punchup. That live. Hey, guys. I'm in Tacoma this weekend. It's all sold out. Guys, if you want to come up and hug me at a show and touch a little of this hero. No, no. I don't want to hug you. If you want to hold Bobby. Bobby's doing a hold and greet after the shows.

I'm doing holding greets from now on. You should only do hold and greet. Yeah. Bobby Kelly Holden greets. Free of charge, everybody, for everybody after the show, you get to hold them. We'll see you guys tomorrow. We'll see tomorrow. It's going to be back. I love you, Bobby.