The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Break Down The Bar (feat. Brian Scolaro)

Episode Date: June 17, 2021

A video of a naked lady trashing a bar sparks discussion on how Jay and Dan would go about it themselves and Brian Scolaro tells the gang how his advice may have ruined a life.Stream "The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson & Dan Soder" for 3 months free on the SiruisXM app! Offer Details Apply: www.SiriusXM.com/BonfireFollow us on all social media @TheBonfireXM@DanSoder www.DanSoder.com@BigJayOakerson www.BigJayComedy.com@Brian_Scolaro www.BrianScolaro.com#CrackleCrackle

Hey, it's Big J. Okerson and Dan Soder. Welcome to the Bonfire Podcast. We'll have new episodes every morning, Tuesday through Friday. You want more bonfire. You can hear our full show every day on SiriusXM. You can go to SiriusXM.com slash bonfire for a special three month offer. The Bonfire! The Bump Bar. Yeah, there was a video of a woman that went viral briefly just fucking destroying a bar. Like in the most fun looking way. Think about how you would destroy a bar. If you got to destroy a bar, like- Won't be my approach.

You're just going for peer destruction. Is this a restaurant bar? destruction. This is a restaurant bar? Yeah, it's a restaurant. Yeah, like a PF Changs or like a... So it's like the bar of a PF Changs. Yeah, how do I attack it? All right, the first thing I'm doing is whether it be with several spinning kicks, idealistically.

Yeah. Or you're bringing flare, I mean. Or a sweeping laryette. I'm clear now those glasses There's so many glasses I get worried back in cut though. No, no, no, no, I'm clothes lining them all off They're hitting the floor. Oh, come on down Then it's a fucking I'd say bottles Swing and throw at the other shelves try to make the shelves all collapse awesome

Go high god forbid they have some high-level displays like the stands got those high-disease no one's touching I'm gonna make the shelves all collapse. Awesome. Uh, go high. God forbid they have some high level displays. Like the stands got those high display, no one's touching. Yeah. Dude, I'm taking another stand. I am bullsying a bottle of Jack Daniels into the middle of that and seeing how much I could take down that. Real, real hatchet toss, like a fucking...

A fucking... Take it from the bottom of the, you take it by the mouth of the bottle. Middle of the, I'm trying to take down the highest level of bar with a bottle hook. Sure. And then I probably start trying to axe kick. If the tables are particle boarding off to be axe kicked in half. Now you're just destroying the bar bar bar. Okay, then there's some more. uh, oh, zing and fruit. Yeah. Zing and I would almost go with, I think I would start with a fruit, medley, a rain of fruit of bar fruits.

And then get the attention. Yeah. And then I want the, I want the approach of one bottle at a time, really putting some on it. I'm going to flip one one thing on that and say for me, the explosion at the end is gonna be that's the finale is the fruit coming out. Okay, that's strong finale. That's the only 3D. I would hope to grab a rack of the bottles at the end. You know that's like up and pull that big rack. Sometimes there's a rack of bottles on the top and just pull them down.

Oh yeah, I'm gonna punch because the things you can break like that look cooler, you gotta take out. So I'm gonna punch the POS system. Oh, I meant the wine glasses on the top. That's what I'm gonna pull down at the end. Yeah, that's what, not good for the end. The bottles I'm gonna pull one at a time. It's good for the hour, it's like a Greek wedding.

Yeah. I'm punching the POS system right in the chops. Then I'm gonna take, I wanna do that, remember that move from American History X when he takes the Cash register and he fucking throws it through a thing. I want to do that. Okay. I'm not assuming that I'm on a white Supremus tie-raid as was were they in that movie? No, you are going yourself looking a very, you know, that's why there's a smashroom with the Philadelphia arena. There's yeah, those are like thing that was that's a thing to do it's not a you know

Yeah, not I just for the record not the name of white supremacy day. There you go. Just I just want to do it It's a bar. No black loot on side. I mean now black. I think this is I there's a very upscale white bar Then I'm bashing apart right now. There's nothing to do. What if I told you it wasn't it was owned by an Hispanic couple Oh my god Jason and this was their dream. Hyperfitting. I said, I wrote you in. I go, it's a gay couple, a Latino gay couple that you just destroyed their life dream. Nothing to go backwards at all, but 17 times I told somebody yesterday or just said, laughed

out loud to Tony Roberts saying he met Rosa Parks. She's so old. She wrote a book called What Bus. Yeah. Maybe laughs so fucking hard yesterday. I mean, What bus? That making me laugh was the thought that he did that was such a solid joke. And then she died. It is one of the most fucking crazy things you're always like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Back to the destruction of bar. I think i would pull out all of the fridge items and do a lot of like

okay a lot of jackson polyking just all over the place and then what's in the fridge tell me uh... you go you got your cream based things got bottles of beer great great great great great great great and i think is out of the fridget

it was called for some now that that's room temperature but then you can break you can break grenadine. I think is out of the refrigerator He was cold for some reason. No, that's room temperature But then you can just go through and rip up all and then I would do the bottles then The finale would be the crescendo would be pulling down all the wine glasses from the top top down as you did to this woman Bash shout out guy. Yeah. We'll show this video. Now wait a sec, before we go to the video, DJ Lou, would you like to tell us how you have destroyed a bar before your wife?

Are we close at all? DJ Lou, you're the John Madden of destroying bars. What did you do? First thing you want to do is get the perishables. The glasses out of the way, those are breakable. I would never hurt liquor. Oh, sweet, beautiful liquor. Oh, liquor came to all your baseball games. Yeah. He goes, no one throws the warm sauce. No one throws it. All right, go ahead. This is a lady attacking one. By the way, check the bod. Okay, oh, she's also, she's naked.

Oh, I should have told you, we're both naked while we're doing this. Oh, dude, okay, this might change that. First thing I'm gonna do is I'm gonna do slowly and methodically, but as quick as humanly possible, fashion bar rags into an outfit for myself. Then everything I said to send in one of them. I would, you know what I would do? I would go hunting, I think I agree with you. I would go hunting in the hutches for an apron. Oh, yes, yes, I'd be looking for an apron,

and maybe like one of those like, what if I were the shaker glasses to cover my dong? No, no, no, no, what if you could only wear a short little apron? Man, but your little tutsie, your butt. So I've unlimited time to destroy this box. Yeah, I'm going to be looking for an apron, and maybe like one of those like, what if I were the shaker glasses to cover my dong. No, no, no, what if you could only wear a short little apron? Oh man. Put your little tutsis, your butt. So I limited time to destroy this bar,

because it would take me longer. So I'm going to really be paying attention to my angles. Yeah, you have all the time you need. Damn, I wish I was just Zach Amiko like fancy free dude. Just let my little bird hang out. I don't care. You know, it's cold in those bars. Yeah.

So it's going to be little. Be flopping around. You know it's cold in those bars. Yeah, so it's gonna be little Be flopping around but everyone I have to do really good on the I don't be moving too much now and jiggle it. I don't want to throw those kicks now that I was talking about all that shit Oh, that wild I was picture in sweatpants or karate pants. Oh, man. Yeah, it'll be yeah, I wouldn't like I'm just don't perfect when I'm reaching up for stuff. There's just a lot of The pictures would be bad Yeah, yeah, my nuts hanging below the apron. So a bar

I think what I do is I Screamed up my lungs and open hands slap a whole row of alcohol bottles and run out of the bar Smash everything I Just drinking again and then till I got confident. Yeah, I'm gonna fuck this place up. Fuck me, sir. I don't care if you can see my cock. I said I'm gonna fuck this place up. I'm gonna get on dress. If I got smoke, I'm about to go. I'm about to go Tasmanian devil on this fucking place. I'm gonna get on dress. Yeah, I'm gonna fuck this placeice. Hey listen, if one of you guys wants to come kiss me, I won't break a bottle of your choice. Dude, if you were to P.F. Changzo and a naked chick, I haven't seen her yet.

Wait, let's do it. Check this out. We'll tweet it out at the Bonfire SXM. We'll be though. Yeah, it's Christine's. Oh, there's a buzzer. Keep it a full screener now. Uh, yeah, you might want to bring the volume down too, because there is an alarm It's Christine's. Oh, there's a buzzer. Can you make a full screen or no?

Uh, yeah, you might want to bring the volume down too, because there is an alarm going off. I love that. Ladies go in crazy. Just stick through to the end. Do it, do it, do it, do it. Do it, do it, do it. Oh, that's it.

Man, please. Up on the bar. Throws the fruit. That was her first make it naked naked One bottle. It was titties are hot bottles. Look at that bam one at a time More about the string product then by the way I when a girl's naked though even the guys have worked there like yeah They're walking through oh she's giving you a but hole right now you're behind her butthole and she's in flip flops.

It looks like I think the back of her foot. Dude, I would post up right behind her at this fucking Benihana. Yeah, the shift manager, just watch her. You go. Hey, Ronald, you're back on glassware. Here's what I do. I would call the cops and then just enjoy it, man.

Yeah. Yeah, why get my ball? Getting about it. Also, you're not going to put your ass on the line. I'm the owner I come in and I grab her and I find a way to get my finger up her ass all in the grab. And I'm like, what am I supposed to do?

I own this. She's destroying my prop. Well, I didn't mean to bowling ball her. Now she goes down. He put fingers in me. I go, did I? I was grabbing it, whatever. So now here come the cops.

They come in. They all to get down. Watch her hot lady naked energy. She's destroying glasses, throwing bottles come the cops they come in they all to get down watch her hot lady naked energy She's just throwing glasses throwing bottles at the cops at the cops throwing bottles at the cops You know I do she knows she's two blow jobs away from walking on this whole thing She's I would I would tell you she's won over the pants hand job from just being escorted to down She's going to run you guys there it is bring that back a little no watch what watch the teaser? Oh, yeah Watch watch her walk up cuz she's a favorite video ever if you bring up the volume she goes

I think she says something like all right. I'm done. I'm done. And then the cops like you ain't done Throwing bottles and then she's like, I'll come around. I'm coming, I'm coming, you know. Just let him go. When I let it flow, you're shooting when I let it flow. Go around, go around. Go around, go around. Oh, no, let's see, what is he going to say I'm done?

Let's go, let it go. I let it flow. I let it flow. I let it flow. I let it flow. I'm a naked Floridian lady. 51 years old. Really? Good bod for 51. I'm pretty sure Black Luke, can you look that up? But I'm pretty sure she is 51 years old. Damn.

51 she can get it. Hey, dude, are you kidding me? That's a gilf. Without a doubt, dude. Them hard Florida titties, though. That's what it is. Hard Florida titties. Who's got a harder, I said, I said it's harder. Scott's nailer Florida. Phoenix tits or Florida tits. Phoenix, because Phoenix is a drier heat. Keeps him tighter. You see the ripples in the bags.

You get the moisture in the air in Florida. Keeps him probably a little. Oh, he's a little, he's a little more like a, get the jiggles. Yeah, but 51 right there. That's a solid fucking profile. a little skiddle a little more like a get the jiggles yeah but fifty one right there that's a solid fucking profile fifty three year old Tina Kendrick Tina oh that's just right there dude I grabbed it by the shoulder and one

finger-upper ass and and a butt cheek and I'd remove her from that bar oh I would I would argue it's my bar I I'm talking as my bar. I'm an employee there, just taking the show. I would assess the situation. Yeah, you know, I would check probably the BH angle. And then what I'm doing to her in this moment right here is an RKO out of nowhere. I'm coming up, grabbing the head, pulling her down in between the bar and it's fucking. No, this girl's left the leg lift the leg one two three we're having beers with the boys now at the holiday this girl's gone completely batshit so

the my point I was being like does she what's the argument here if you grab what you're not going to grab her by any part whatsoever huh I'm just going for fun I'm going to take her out in a fun way you're trying to hurt her she's breaking my bar yeah you could do that with a girlfriend, she gets that along. Do you know what I mean? I'm talking about someone you really have an option here

to be like, I'm completely in the right, whatever I do. You wouldn't just try to like have your thumb, grazer, butthole? Probably. Yeah, think, dude. Probably. That's why female crowd surfing is, should be illegal. It should be illegal. It should happen. It should absolutely not happen

I it's I know myself to genuinely I would never ever take advantage of a situation like that ever however In that many people like somebody is drunk enough to just be like I'm gonna slide a finger in Yeah, that's crazy listen into a song. It's like for some guys That's crazy listen into a song. It's like for some guys By the way, maybe because of the crowdservids always gotta be to like I did it off for the lucky You're just enjoying that and then a finger slide. Hey Sometimes you just wake up Like shit, but even stuff where it's like sometimes you've got to trust your instincts

Oh fuck I've got the I have the tiger I think that definitely happened the Courtney love when she she crowdsurfed it did I might have even been at a concert when that happened, but maybe I'm just Dude, I will never forget I was working I was working security for I was by working security I mean I sat in a car in a parking lot for a warp tour and Popper Oathe just dropped last resort and a girl was crowdsurfing They dropped her and they stopped the song and they're like Suffocation nobody okay guys. Hey guys. Let's Okay guys guys guys guys we gotta get her off and cuz she just went Dude we were supposed to be blocking this like side exit. There was so much traffic and it was like me and my No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Yeah, they're like do it that we were high enough because we can get in high in the car that we were like

What if we let it like a couple cars out My friend Chad had a had a pony aqua malls like a 72 pony aqua malls Those is dads and like he was just like the family car and he he backed it up and we opened it and everyone But rush out and there was like oh my doggy doggy's like what's going on There was like oh my god he's gonna like what's going on Everyone's like oh fuck is this a road out of the venue and dude that was one of the most and our boss came It just fucking shoot us. I gotta say it almost don't want this information out there because In eventually would stop. But the most malleable wheeling, you're ever going to get in your life is with a person at parking. Yes. At VIP parking, particularly. I would park close to a place where

there is close parking, but there's also like further away parking. If you're willing to give a little more, those guys will always, they don't care about their job that let me test. They'll move a cone. I'm going to testify to that because that was basically my job for one summer at Fiddler's Green, which is an amphitheater in Denver. And what I would always be the guy in the parking lot, and you know, I think it was like the up and smoke tour like uh that

holds like Snoop Dre Eminem all them people would just come up to me and be like you do smoke weed and I was like yeah like I'll give you two blunts if you let me park here and I just move my car and they'd go to the back of the parking lot and then I got put on VIP lot for Ziggy Marley and people were just pulling up the VIP lot And they're like look stop in the crew coming in right dude, but check this out. What you mean? No, dude the best was this crunchy ass dude in the geo metro this hippie and he pulled up and he's like He's like hey man. Can I park here? And I was like off you got 40 bucks and he was like no Do you smoke weed and I was like hell yeah

I do and he pulled out a little glass Vase and uncorked it. It was like pull out your hand man, and he don't like this is 1999 and it's like three fucking nugs and I was like dude go He had two dogs in his car and I was like go ahead man go park VIP It was all fucking Mercedes-Benz. This isn't shit shit and it started raining I had the 88 Honda Accord hatchback Fujiac was working with me we smoked bowls out of this mini this little tiny tin pipe and it was one of the most stoned I've ever been in my life where it was raining and I was scared to go outside because it was so high I was like

oh that hippie weed is fucking my shit up. It fucking rocked me. That was because I was, and I made $260, $60 that day, just in side cash for that people parked there. They don't care that much. And then everyone in the crew would try to fight to get VIP parking. Just no one's double checking every,

if you park in the, once you're parked in the VIP lot, you're parking. You're gonna go in that entrance. And by the way, you can still only go like where your ticket will take you. Do you know what I mean? But like you could just be in that I would say fuck spending money on a better. You gotta be willing. You gotta spend money on a better on better parking. Absolutely true. At the end of the show, you're gonna, you're gonna it's gonna pay dividends for sure on the back end. But if you're gonna you're gonna it's gonna pay dividends for sure on the back end

Yeah, but if you're willing to pay double the price of parking. Yeah, you'll park wherever you want to park If it's 20 bucks if you'll pay 40 bucks You'll park you'll park next to the tour bus if I get if I get tickets To like a thing and someone's driving and they pick up the parking. I'm always like, come on, don't fucking cheap on me. Don't cheap on me. Oh, like a friend being like, so general parking is this way. You're like, come on. Good parking.

I got the, also if you have a laminate from any year of a tour and show it to the parking people, you will park backstage. Oh, that was my, they have no idea. That was when I'm Kenny Rogers. I just needed to see a layer. I'd say that's one of my favorite things. Please go again.

Oh yeah, I was, that was that summer. I was working at Fiddler's Green and I was on the entrance, the artist entrance. I was in the backstage entrance for cars and everyone had to show a lamp that had to show a pass to get through. You had to have a pass of some sort to get through But you're absolutely right. I was not checking in detail what the passes were if you got a if you just went like this to me I was like, yeah, I'm on that's a person a police all the time. Yeah

And by the way, everyone's always like that doesn't work. It totally works Because I didn't fucking look so it was an FBI that talked to you sternly, you're like, he's FBI. Yeah. Why don't you talk to me so sternly? And it was like this blue expedition, and it just pulled up, and the guy's like, hey, what's going on, man?

I'm like, you got, you have a pass? And he's like, no, man, I don't have a pass. I'm like, I can't let you back here unless you have a pass. And I'm 16 or 17 years old. And then in the passenger seat, just leans up, and he goes, I 17 years old. And then in the passenger seat just leans up and he goes, I'm Kenny Rogers. And it's Kenny Rogers and I'm like, you are. That's awesome.

Great. Yeah, and then he just went back to me. I came to your radio. And then I got to see him do the gambler that night. So great. It was pretty great. I watched it. I told you that.

I saw him. We took off our shirts and got to go watch the last song. And when we walked in, there was a girl kicking the shit out of her boyfriend. Yeah. Like hockey style like whap whap whap and he was just eating it and we had our shirts off so we were like I'm not doing anything. Damn abuse husband so funny so funny so funny and he just I don't know what he did.

I think he was hammered but he caught a wolf and didn't want a richie who covered this song. hammered but he caught a wolf and didn't line a richi who covered this song uh didn't he complain that he was beat up by a wife but did he have a domestic abuse claim really I think so someone dare put hands on Lionel Richie Lionel Lionel my bad Lionel Lionel we stick our first break we have a guest we have a guest today yeah Yeah Brian. Yeah. Oh, really? Yeah. Brian's Cholaro. From many, many things. Of course. What's this? Oh, yeah. Lionel Richie's wife was arrested for allegedly hitting the pop singer. This is in 1988. After a pop singer and a young woman, after she found them together in a woman's

bedroom. No, no. Brenda Richie was booked on. Sing a dance. She was booked on suspicious of corporal injury to a spouse, resisting arrest, trespassing, vandalism, battering and disturbing the peace after the early morning incident. But it was released on $5,000 bail. The other woman was identified as Diana Alexander, 22.

identified as Diana Alexander 22 So romantic I want you to be oh Cuz my dad There's something I want you to know turn that way I'm gonna put your chin around look that way You're love of my life You're We'll be right back it's the bonfire We'll be right back. It's the bonfire. Welcome back to the bonfire.

I'm Dan Soder. That's Big J. O'Gerson joining us, Brian Scolaro, who's going to be at the comic strip in El Paso, July 15th through the 18th, and then the Lafactory in Las Vegas, July 26th through the 28th, go get tickets at BrianScolaro.com. You get a book out, how to punch a monkey out now on available on amazon yeah dude look at that what's the book about uh... i think i'm muted

no you know uh... not me at the okay it's uh... it's just like jokes just jokes and skits and it's like my first act in my last act and my second in my new act and just a bunch of stories and hell yeah, it's pretty and more butchered one line is a kind of model that after George Collins brain droppings. That's what I was just going to say it feels like yeah yeah I used to love those man those were like I know books. It's a perfect shit book you know like

yes. Each chapter is a shit length of time. I think we're near I think we're near a point right now where You know, I would feel like a lot of poop books got blown out by the phone and I think it's time we bring back Reading something for the bathroom. I used to love that having like a book I did already langs like that but they're so depressing what already langs books being sad and shitting Yeah, oh man, you know what the sound like I had to story here about how I talked my I did already langs like that but they're so depressing. What are you langs books? It's like being sad and shitting. Yeah. Oh, man, he went to the stars. Yeah, mine's like, well, I have to story it here about how I talked my caricatures in the doing standup

and ruined this career. Oh, no. Now, I would tell you that story. Is that real? Yeah, I was, I was, I was, as 2005, I'm on a jet blue flight from New York to LA. And I was like, I'm gonna book a pilot this year. I know it and I did.

I wound up booking and stacked with my with my man as an as I'm flying This guy's this next to me. He's in the middle seat and I realized it's Michael Richards But he's got the skies on but I recognize his voice and he sees me typing and then on TV is serial on the flood in serial Enca and he goes that's horrible isn't it and I go yeah, yeah, it's horrible. And he goes, I see you're writing, are you a writer? I go, no, I'm a comedian. I was like, we actually have mutual friends. And he goes, I can't do comedy.

I try to stand on comedy. I'm not good at it. And I was like, I've seen you do it. I seen you do the young comedian special with David Tall, you were the host. He was, yeah, but I wasn't good at it. And I said, you should do it. I said, I'll give you the phone number, the last factory.

You just perform under a fake name so you can practice. He said, okay, and then Cut to two months later. I'm flying back to New York on the same flight And on the TV is Michael Richards flips out and I see the clip and I go, holy shit I was like the reverse bars. I'm the reverse bars gum. I ruined his life I got to make a t-shirt with his Marley face. I ruined this man's life. What's the deal with being on a flight when you convince a guy to say the N word? That's what the flight was. You know what I'm saying?

You also go like, and also lean into the race stuff. I mean, you really, that? I mean, you've been at a comedy for a while, but that's what the kids love now. You know what I mean? Let it fly. See it? Use the lingo. He was so nice to me. It was so nice.

He was so nice to me. That's so funny. When I was leaving, he fucking, he reached over and he fixed the strap on my bag over my shoulder. Like he was such a nice guy. And everyone there is like, good and bad man.

Get in there, if you stand up. And then the next thing you know, it's just, that's what he's known. You should try it. And then everyone is like, but you know, it's a lot, it's a lot, you should try it. You know, then I wrote his life, but you know, it's well Zola actor not doing standup. We don't need any more of those. Yeah, what a what a way to teach a lesson to all the other actors Don't come sniffing around here. Yeah When's Pivin gonna yell the N word? Yeah

This is it's gotta be coming any day now man Jeremy Pivin Jeremy Pivin though they do give him they I haven't gone to a club yet the tat and that's been like he's been super pleasant. Oh, otherwise they're all like he's a major pain in the ass front of back. Yeah, because I think when you start off as a superstar actor and then come into comedy you think it's gonna be like set life. Oh, that's what I go. You see, when you see Perry A in the fridge in the green room,

you're like, PIV's been here. They go, how did you know? Yeah, I guess, odds I know. Perry A. The snacks are too healthy. Yeah, I know Bob Goldfoot wants tab. I don't even know if they make tab anymore, but he's better than you wants tab. I don't even know if they make tab anymore, but Yeah, later that you get tab that's who they do have tab overseas

So I guess that's what they do, but I whenever I play in place It's always difficult because I started my career with getting notes from Fox executives and NBC executives And they're so polite Brian could you try this way Brian? Thank you so much. Would you mind coming to do this? Now I get yelled at by club. Oh, there's a witch atop for going a minute over a minute under it's It's a difficult transition and I knew my career was over when I landed in Kansas City and the after the right A strike and I wasn't getting a lot of acting work and landed in Kansas City and the world picked me up as you said Do you want to see my squirrel? I was like what? Yeah, I have a squirrel. Do you want to see it? And I was like, okay. And she let the squirrel out of the cage and it ran up inside of my face

and I never tell you I liked it. I was like, oh, that's what I knew my career was over. And now officially just a stand-up comic in the longer a regular on TV. It was a hell of an adjustment. Okay, it'll be in face fuck by a squirrel. What club was that? Stanford and sons. I know it. That guy, he's crazy. Hold on.

No, Brian. Brian, make sure you should understand that we have gone very in depth into Craig Glazer. There's not a listener of this show who's not aware of Craig Glazer and his hit YouTube series, A Man and His Dog. Go on, just confesses to sexual harassment and racism a bunch. Wow. Go on to YouTube. That guy was insane. He brought me to radio and he did all the talking.

Yep. And I'm not gonna interrupt the guy I was painting. And then the car is like, you just say one thing. When you do radio, you gotta talk. I I'm like thanks. It was all you talking about your penis and fucking a hooker. Yeah. And then you brought me into his office and ripped the girls dress off. Like what do you think? And the girl was mortified. Oh yeah. That moment I was like, oh all right man thanks for having me and I just left. And he never had the back end for that. Yeah. He does that. That was the way he was. He was so legendary in my life that Christine came with me one time with Kansas. I've all gig she would come with me on. She came solely

to meet and thank God because now the late great Craig Glazer. She had to see him in person. I go, you got the whole thing. She never, he went, she comes to row withzer. She had to see him in person. I go you got and I the whole thing she never he when she comes the row with me She never comes to press she never comes to press Very very rarely. Yeah, she just sleeps which is fine, but like this but but this trip was like no No, that's one of the things. Yeah, you got to wake up and come to press like you got to see this guy You got to see that lotus when he harasses or grabs the tit of someone at the restaurant, you know, and by the way, also I say, I never, almost never, unless there's a big gap between press,

which I hate, if we do all the press, and they go, do you want to stop and get some food? I say no, 100% of the time. And I said unless there's a gap, and we have to do more press. I say no, when he would say after the press, like you want to get some food. I go. Yeah. I need a little more of you Dude I need to see you now interacting with you. I want to see you with the wait staff that you don't own and and I mean He's not much better man. I

Would honestly say that it's there's there's a part of me that feels like he was the most honest and owner has ever been with me We're in between shows on Friday and Adi goes, hey listen man, I'm going to miss the late show. I got a slut outside in the bar and she's ready to go. So I'm not going to be here when you get off stage. You're like, thank you for telling me why you're not going to be here instead of acting like I got a problem. He was so like, I'd see him say to wait staff.

It would just be like, he was trying to impress me So like because I'm not a I'm not a big personality in Especially by myself. Yeah, did I mean it was like me and Christine I've never like those these word ham. I don't ham at restaurants now Me and you together like might more you know you have another friend there with you You played a little more. Chug her out for your butt. Elevator hands.

Well, yeah, but we're together. Yeah, but um, yeah, the fucking, um, the fuck, what's my point? We were talking about with Craig with him, but he was trying to impress you and press me with the wait staff and he would like, uh, so he was being a hand, but like, the most inappropriate way, you know, I mean He's like let's say desert island you have to procreate you have to have sex with a guy You would with me, right? He's like a guy would just say something like that like and it's just like to a wait staff And they're like I guess like yeah, right? So I mean that I'll take that as a win He's just like he thinks being charming by being dirty uncle, but he's got that Wormankin out, I have a wildsaw for his skirt up, I got my Wiener out.

What the guy like that does, you're not really surprised, you know. What's the quote again? What's the quote again, says Lou? Wormankin out, I have a wildsaw for his skirt up, I got my Wiener out. You've been listening to SiriusXM's bonfire! New episodes every Tuesday through Friday mornings and full shows always on SiriusXM! you