The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Burning Men

Episode Date: September 25, 2026

The artist Pink is in trouble for controversial comments and Bob questions Jay about the time he met her on a plane. | The guys learn about Burning Man and Jay wants to go even though there seem to be no black people there. | Tim Dillon threw an extravagant party in the Hamptons, inviting many comedians. Two young comedians were there and made a podcast about the event in which they trashed the attendees. Jay and Bobby learn new Gen Z terms like "kiki" and "finna" when they watch video of these youngsters. *To hear the full show go to www.siriusxm.com/bonfire to learn more! FOLLOW THE CREW ON SOCIAL MEDIA: @thebonfiresxm @louisjohnson @christinemevans @bigjayoakerson @robertkellylive @louwitzkee @jjbwolf Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of The Bonfire ad-free and a whole week early. Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

And now, the bonfire with Big J. O'Kerson and Robert Kelly. Work it, girl. Pink's in trouble, Christine just said. Yeah. Because she used to say she was probably half black. She was Rachel Dulles-alding before it was cool. You met her, right? Yeah.

On a plan, you guys have friends for a minute? No. Not friends at all. Did you think you were going to be friends? No, I thought I was going to fucking hit on her because she was going to be impressed that I was going to do Comic View and she was going to finish her first album

but I didn't believe her. Not that I didn't believe her, it was just like, that's dime a dozen. This is like the real deal what I'm going to go do. Like, sure, you're doing a record deal. You probably believe that. And then, so I kind of just dismissed her

because I was kind of like, I was trying to brag, and now I feel like you're bragging. And then she was sitting behind me in the plane. Like right behind me? I mean, just like further back in the plane. Not in first class? No. Wow, so she wasn't even in first class?

No. And I... I wonder if she remembers those days. And she does not remember the story. She waved at me when we got on the plane kind of like a, you know, it's like, you know, whatever. And she said, she said the thing we were in line. She goes, oh, we'll both be able to say we met each other. Before we were famous.

And I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, sure. When we're both famous, idiot. And then when I worked at 7-Eleven, her album came out. I was working overnight to 7-Eleven. That's great. And they bring in the singles, the CD singles would be there. And I saw it. I was like, oh, I guess she was, oh, good for her.

And then I always told that story. And then Dean Edwards, when he worked on SNL, she was a musical guest. and he loves that story and he told her the story and she was just like, I don't remember that at all. Like, yeah.

Yeah. That sucks. Remember we met in line in an airplane fucking forever ago? Now, do you think you would have remembered it if she didn't become famous? Nope.

No. It would have been gone. Nope. Out of your head. Out of my head. Absolutely. In fact, yeah, if she would have changed her name

to something else when she got famous, it wouldn't even have struck me she might just went I wouldn't even notice that that was her do you know what I mean? Yeah so She said her name was Alicia whatever it is And then she was like or Alicia but she was like sing as pink And I was like oh

That's dumb That's what I thought So it sounded stupid Before there was a pink it sounded really dumb as shit If she never became hugely Holy shit successful Like really she did she did Yeah that's what I'm saying like she became

wow, like iconic success If she never became iconic award winning successful 30 year career 30 year career holy shit

you think that you wouldn't remember if she didn't okay yeah okay good no no no so since I'm none of those things

she probably doesn't remember me man I bet she was hot Philly trash when she was young though Is she from Philly? Oh yeah oh yeah Yeah, it's why we were flying out of the same airport.

Wow. Yeah, she looked cute as hell with hair. Well, yeah, I didn't love the short hair first. She was wearing a bandana when I met her. But, man, I bet when she was young and had hair, she was a pig. Do you want to hear her? Total neighborhood skis, too. Yes, of course I want to hear her.

At the block parties. And I was also over here, you know, doing other people. If you pull a white girl out of like that kind of that world, and they just kind of reinvented her to be like, you know, a pop star, essentially. Not that she doesn't have, like, you know, soul. She could sing really good. She's a great singer and she could do all that. But this eventually just gets out of you.

She's just been to enough fancy dinners with celebrities you wouldn't expect she'd be friends with. You know what I mean? Like, Pink's been to a dinner party, Kathy Bates House. So she doesn't come with any of the energy of kind of like, yeah, you know, Cat, when I was young back in Philadelphia, just getting, you know, there's none of that. She's very refined now, I'm sure. So it is funny to see. I guarantee you talk like that, too, when you were...

We watched it. Like, people were rude to. I thought you were doing carriage. That's the way you really talked. I guess. I didn't think that I, uh, pandered that. Why didn't use, I didn't use terms. I didn't use the terms, but apparently my voice is very like, yeah, no, I was up to that.

You get upset about that night. All right, y'all. All right, y'all. Wow, these lights are. What else? Yo, these bitches in here is. fucking looking foin' night. You ever put something in your ass and do some gay shit?

You ever busting up at a girl's guts? And then all of a sudden you saw it smell her booty hole. God, I'm sorry, more black pink, please. But people think, I mean, there's a poll going on, like a bet going on it. My friend's work, they think my mom lied to me about who my dad is. Like, they totally think I'm mixed. I'm like, whatever. Like, I'm a mutt.

We all are. We all came from the same place, God. and that's how I said. We're all pink on the inside, whatever you want to call it. We're all pink on the inside, she just said. That's true spiel. That is true spiel. She doesn't even know what that term means, I don't think, at this point.

The truth spiel. She wouldn't have said that we're all pink on the inside. What are she getting? You expect me. I was singing in an all black church. That's it. Yeah, it's just an accent you kind of pick up. I was hanging out with all gay guys for years.

I'd be like, hey, what's up, girls? Yeah, marshmallows. Yeah. Hapapapalopalas. Is that what it was? You were hanging out with a bunch of gays. That's it.

I was hanging out with a bunch of gays, man. Dane Cook and gays. Exclusively. Yeah, it's just, it's like when you, like when Madonna went to England for a couple years and married Guy Ritchie,

she came back and she was talking like this. What a dumb bitch. It really is. It was showed me what a stupid dumb bitch Madonna is. There is like an Asian community where their first generation in L.A., particularly where it's like all of their English is learned in the hood.

Yeah. So they do, know, it's not what they're hearing at home. It's how they actually are raised. You assimilate. You assimilate to your surroundings. I don't know. It's not genuine about that. It's just legitimately how they are.

I would love to do an experiment, like put Jacob in the hood for a year and see if he comes back with like a hood accent. Like different? Yeah, a little different. Yo, man, it's cold as shit in here, motherfucker. Man, warm this bitch up. Yo, man. Why have got to be like Antarctica in here?

Yeah, why? You man, why I got a smile, motherfucker? Yo, it's like North Pole up in here. That's my face, motherfucker. Yo. Yo, come on, boy. Come on, boy, it's cold. Turn that heat up, bitch.

Before I get over there and make heat happen. Yo, get me my blanket. Get my Kiki cold, bitch. You fat motherfucker. Yeah, Jacob. Get my studio coveralls. Homeboy. You mean?

Muzzle tough motherfucker. These are two kids. You want to watch this? Two comics, shit talking Tim's party. I would love to. I want to hear the truth about Tim's parties. And this is the truth. Who of Who's That?

Everybody there was from Central Casting. A real who's who of who gives the shit. A real who's who of who the fuck cares. I'm so happy I didn't go. That would have hurt my feelings thinking they were talking about me. Who gives it? She's like, oh. Were there any comics we know there?

I don't know. I don't think so. I mean, last time we were there, Bethany Frankel showed up. I, if there's anybody I don't like, if there's anybody I don't like, it's that woman. Was it in Calder? Ugh. Who, Bethany Frankel? She's just a lot.

She kind of stunk on Z. She was on Z rock for an episode and like, she was like nice-ish, but you can see her. She still already had that diva thing. And she wasn't like, she was just the maker, the creator of that product at that point. She was on the housewives of something. Yeah, right? That's a better famous. Yeah, she's a housewife.

She's an original. She had a business thing before. Yeah, like skinny girl. Yeah, but that came out of housewives. That came out. Did it? Yeah, she became famous with that after housewives. Yeah, but she always looks...

I don't know, dude. She's wild. I mean, she did a fashion show. Oh, my God. It's forced wild. It's forced wild. She looks like nighttime regiment creams. Yeah.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah, she applies them all. She has a whole regiment at night of her creams and fucking ointments. It takes her three hours to go to bed and three hours to wake up. Yeah. Oh, everything requires. She's to get something out of the fridge to put in her fucking face.

Yeah, she has an ice pillow. She actually hangs upside down like a bat because she needs the blood to go to her fucking face. I don't like her. She's annoying. And she blames everything on, you know, that's my ADHD.

That's my, shut up. You're annoying. I don't like her at all. I don't know you know so much about her. Oh, she probably never listens. I guarantee she doesn't listen to anybody. Probably not. Bobby watches her reels all the time.

Yeah, you love her, dude. I don't. I think you fucking hate her because you ain't her. Let me get a little taste of Bethany. Here's Burning Man, Bethany. Burning Man, too. Can we stop with this stupid festival? Here's the thing.

It's based on fucking electronic music, so I'll never give a shit. But I don't, it's such a... If it was a cool desert, like rock fest that had bad, I think it's a cool idea. I wouldn't do it because I'm not a camp out in the desert person. But these aren't either, and they don't came out. at these high-end high-end RVs, but it's always

a shit fest. It's always it looks like you're in Baghdad in fucking 2005. Yeah, Sturgis is the same thing. Sturgis started getting dominated by people who showed up there with like $200,000 RVs with their bikes attached to it. And they, I mean, they're camping

in a fucking, they bring a house to a place. I went into some of those to, when I interviewed people at Sturgis, it's crazy. Yeah, but Sturgis is beautiful. The town is. is amazing. This thing is in the middle of fucking nowhere, and it's always a just environmental nightmare

with the wind and the sand, and it just sucks. Why would you want to go somewhere? You have to wear goggles. The women wear such little clothes, and I have to say, I couldn't think of anything worse for my exposed pussy than sandstorms.

Constant sandstorms. Hey, I hope you don't get horny, and it sticks to you like glitter on glue. It's fucking annoying. I hate this. That would be funny of the coming a woman's stomach and then send her out of the tent and then it comes back and it's got like the glitter glue it's like it's like you wrote like your name in her stomach in jizz and now it's got sand

in it you guys picture what i'm saying i feel like i'm describing it bad yeah who's this baron von cunt face yeah and it's it's like it's like mad max yeah it's what it looks like it does look at mad max i have no interest in going to burning i mean i from a if someone's like hey well helicopter in hang for the night and then leave, I'd watch it. I'd watch what happens. I understand these people who are like fucking hippies and can this type of shit they like. But for famous people to go here, I don't know what the...

Well, that's the people hate it now. Yeah. The people who are into Burning Man for Burning Man hate it. Hot Chicks always do photo shoots there. Well, they just said it's all because, though, of like, it's the celebrities is. It's rich people have come taking it over, right? And they made it all like, it's not corporate or anything. I love it.

that it's for the wealthy now, and it's like, you know, a bunch of rich people trying to rough it for the weekend. It's just rich people don't drugs. It used to be people trading. I love it. I love that rich people will always ruin everything. It used to be like, really, it's like, I'll trade you a frisbee for a soda. It's like how it worked there. It used to be like the real hippie festival.

Well, I don't know if it was hippies. It was always electronic music shit, I think. Was it always like, because it was. No, it was always like punky. It's in the middle of nowhere and it's like a... No, I know, but it was always about like glowy, punky drugs. It wasn't a hippie thing. Bonaroo was hippie thing.

Bonner was supposed to be a hippie-dippy thing. Bonner was the best. I knew a girl exactly the way you described. She went to this thing every year. It was her pilgrimage. She was super good-looking, but she used crystal deodorant. So her underarms always stunk. Nice.

That's perfect for this place. Probably. The festival has lost its soul, says the co-founder. And what do they light the thing on fire at the end? and everybody goes around it on drugs. You're supposed to use drugs here, right? Drugs is a big thing. You don't just go here sober, right?

Some people probably do, yeah. But the thing is, go. I think the idea is it's a place where it's, but it's like what's not like that? That's Woodstock, that's every festival is that. People look at Skank Fest like that. Legitimately, they're like, oh, we're going to, I've heard comics talking about it goes,

oh, man, we're going to take so many drugs that week. And I'm like, have that. I always tell everybody, I'm like, pace yourself, man. Yeah, but Skank Fest is a comedy festival. I mean, I think there's a being sober, and there's so many sober people. I do EDM, though. I do some EDJ. There's that.

Of course there's that. Listen, sure, this year I'm doing two full EDM sets. I should just, I really, I never take advantage of the festival in a sense, Skangfest in a sense of like, hey, give me an hour to DJ at night. Let me just see if I can. Just try. But like scratch records. I'm just like not doing a good job, but maybe I get them a room moving.

But what if you do get the room moving and that's your new path? Oh, I can do that, dude. DJ Polly Jay This is it right here This place looks so unbearable It doesn't look unbearable Like I would have loved to have seen

I kind of wish I told my friend One of my best friends from when I was younger I wish I'd gone and were like 20 something Yeah And you know But what do you do? That's the move Not so accustomed to nice things

I would have to go out there And get some fucking dust pussy I would just have to go out there and get some fucking tent for I would love to go out there and get some fucking tent pussy With that when I was like 20 something Yeah, but where's the bathroom? Is it Porto Potty's the whole weekend? You know my problem is now this wouldn't scare me at all.

Now as an adult, like, I'm not afraid of not having enough money to get out of there or being worried about anything. Do you know what I'm saying? When I was in my 20s, when I would have had the most fun of it, my personality would have been like, this is too scary to be a part of in the sense that, like, how do I get home? I have limited money. I don't know if I have a credit card in my 20, most of my 20s,

that would have gotten me out of the desert on a menace note. You know what I mean? If he ran out of a gang, all these things that would scare this shit that I couldn't over prepare for. But that's what I would have fun. Now, I could go probably, you know, rent a big glamping camper

and go to Burning Man, but who the fuck wants to go to this thing now? This loud-ass fucking stupid festival? Not one stage of my life would I want to go to this dumb dust bucket. What are talking about, Bob? You could have worn fucking goofy clothes with your shredded body.

You could have been a fucking unicorn boy. Fuck that. Dude, a fur-boot unicorn boy? You would have loved that. It's maybe your true calling. You know, Bobby? Maybe when I DJ, you could fucking fur-boot unicorn boy, like next to me. You remember everything.

Just do, like, the whole thing. I remember everything, what? You remember all my little things that I've told you. Fur-boot unicorn boy? Yeah, my fur-crow cowboy boot, my cow boots? I was thinking more like these EDM boots. Dude, I had fur boots. I had high-heeled ankle

pointy cowboy boots with zippers and laces but they were the black and white real cowhide Oh sure I wouldn't call that fur though It was actual cowhide it had no for sure That's not fur but fur is like Jackets or fur they wouldn't call it they would call that like It's just leather that's considered something like that's They're just called that gay

Yeah it's for sure gay but that's I was waiting for that This is what we're getting right here Where are these? That's going to be, oh, there, dude. There's your unicorn boys. Furbu unicorn boy, Bobby. Those are yours right there.

I mean, I'm not going to say I hate them. You don't hate them. No. You should just try them all like one. First of all, I do like an ombray type of thing. And listen, here's a thing. I think it's another year away now at least probably if it hasn't happened already this year. 2007, Series X-M, send me and Bobby to Burning Man.

Send us there to Burning Man. Please don't. Let us go there. Please don't. We'll broadcast from Burning Man. It'll be the funniest thing ever. It will be miserable. Yeah, that's what to be so funny.

And you know they're not going to send us in a really good RV. It's going to be like a U-Haul with a bed in the back and some type of stove. They wouldn't do that to us. Yeah, they would. They'd get us a really good RV. Jacob, make it so. We're going to get a good RV. Make it so, Jacob.

Come on. I actually think it'd be a funny. Let's get something going to. Let's all make a pilgrimage down the fucking Burning Man. It's hilarious. I would be miserable. No, I don't. Listen.

I hate smelly hippies. Yeah, but we'll be laughing the entire time. I just hate them. I'll never go to a dead concert. First of all, you guys are talking all this shit. I bet fucking Jacob's going to go native. You think he's just going to go and come back talking like black? Like, what's up, motherfuckers?

DJ Lou is going to add the word laser to the end. DJ Lou laser and he's going to be fucking shooting beams out of his fucking glasses or something. I tell you, Black Lou is just going to sit in the trailer. He ain't going nowhere. No, no, no, this is like, he'll go out there and try to fucking, he'll be looking at all that fucking white naked ass running around for sure. He won't take his time in there. What is this?

I wouldn't say Burning Man is a white event. Yeah, it probably is. Oh, yeah, for sure. Oh, you crazy? I changed my mind. I changed my mind. I said I changed my mind. That's 100% all of people.

I apologize and said I changed my mind. They do a lot of cool, like, animatronics and robotics that show up around. Oh, yeah. They just do weird. Yeah, like a Rob Zombie concert. That's right. I mean. Um, scary.

No, I'm good. They're just cool. I'm good. And I don't like big fires like that too. Bobby's not going. But the rest of us have to go and broadcast. Bobby can't go. He doesn't want to go to Burning Man as a fucking hilarious road trip pilgrimage.

Buddy, I'll do whatever you want me to do, but I'll say this. I'll go. You know that. I'll do whatever you think is going to be fun. I'll do, but I don't want to go. You love camping. That's not camping. This is.

It's just with a fucking 70,000 people. Yes. Yeah, dude, that... There might not be a dust bowl. It's always a dust bowl. It's always dusty. Well, keep your pecker away. And last year it rained, and it was a mud fucking yuck fest, and everybody looked like shit.

No, dude, we're going to be the fucking bells of the ball. You're going to use a porta potty for a weekend? No, no, no. We're shit in our RV. You're not supposed to shit in RV. You're not supposed to. Yeah. There are ones you can now.

Do you just say that? No. Oh, you can. I watched the thing yet. They have one down. You have no Wi-Fi? We need to give a Starlink. Buddy.

We don't have no fresh water. Of course we will. We'll sell our frisbee's for it. What about what? That's going to be our barters, frisbees for some reason. Let's say bonfire. I have a headache just thinking about it. What?

Why, dude? You got to see Pass. You got to see that it's 3 a.m., dude. It's cool. It's nice and cool. out in the desert. There's a couple of girls just fucking trying to scissor off dust off their pussy hairs. Does it go all night?

Like are people doing shit all night? I'd assume it goes 24 hours for four days. I like to go to bed. You can go to bed. There's just going to be people rave dancing with glow sticks in the daylight. Yeah. So it's loud all night? This shit's going on all night. Probably

sort of loud all night, yeah. So all night long this horse shit's playing in the background. But you could put white noise on inside the RV. What? Jacob going, hi, how are you? Yeah, we used up Jacob saying, hi, how are you? How are you? How are you?

Did you have a nice day? My name's Jacob. Oh, dude, we're going to have so much fun, dude. Radical inclusion. What is that? These are the ten principles of Burning Man. Anyone may be a part of Burning Man. Strangers are welcome and respected without prerequisites.

That's why the rich got in. Gifting. The community is devoted to unconditional acts of gift giving that do not expect their return or exchange. Right. I'm gonna give women friendship bracelets and then pull my dick out and be like what are you doing walking away

I just give you a friendship bracelet that's my barter is this definitely like not a black people thing I would imagine like black women like electronic as guys there's definitely I bet there's more than there's a lot of black

no no no there's a lot of black people here for sure but this is a white event Mayhem Fest Mayhem Fest Mayhem Fest Ozfest there's tons of black people of those things. But it's a white event.

You think black people are going to do radical self-reliance? Yeah, I do. 75% white. There you go. There you go. 8% black. Oh, perfect. 8% other, 2% Those are the people working there. 2% Asian. That surprised

me with all the EDM and animatronics and robots, as you say, Christine. There are robots. What are these things you have to do, though? The Ten, the Commandments? The principles, it says. We had them. Yeah.

There's also a sober group on the playa. Gay. Hey, Bob, you can lead that. You're needed there. I'd do that. I'm sure they probably get to bed at a nice time, wake up early. They probably have fun things. They probably have great food and coffee.

You want to tell a girl who's body-painted pink that she's doing the right thing? Yeah. You're proud of her. Is it one jerk off electronic DJ after another? That's it? Number two is. we got that decommodification what is that burning man community

creates social environments that are unmediated by commercial sponsorships transactions or advertising it resists the substitution of consumption for participatory experience a philosophy of no exploitation preserves the spirit of gifting I don't know what did any of that matter okay good because I don't you read that whole thing

and I still don't know what it is there's just no sponsors there's no corporate like there's no amex tent there's no you know what I mean it's nothing like that everything's just done by the people burning man encourages individuals to discover exercise and rely on his or her inner resources to contribute to the experiences of others as well as their own i do know what that means i think that means pee on people it wants you to use on your inner you want you to use your own inner resources to contribute to the experience of others as well i will be the golden shower that'll be my name in fact i'm gonna be

the golden shower and i'll just constantly be pissing out of a whole hole while people can bathe in my piss. That's the gift I will give. And by the way, I want nothing in return. Can I ask you a question? Can we paint you gold and put you in a throne and have like, you hold a chain and they pull it and that's when you pee on them? Yeah. Okay. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. And just come up to you and you're just standing there like with a cigarette, painted gold. Yeah. And by the way, this all, this all goes into our next thing. What? Radical self-expression. Each person offers their own unique gifts. No one other than the individual or a collaborating group can determine its platform message or voice. My piss. Respect people and their rights and liberties

for expression is a gift from someone to someone else. Silence, passive aggressiveness, and lying only erodes promise and purpose. You can't go. Why? Or Don definitely can't go. Why? She doesn't like to get, she doesn't like to get, she doesn't like to get, she doesn't like to get, she doesn't like to, she's, you can't do passive aggressive. Oh, it's not cool. It's not good. You can't do any of that shit. It erodes promise and purpose. Yeah. Communal effort. Man, these are boring fucking things.

God damn it. Civic responsibility. That sucks. Leaving no trace. I mean, I agree with that. They clean it all up afterwards. I do like that. I do that when I go camping.

You have to leave no trace. But how long before the majority stopped doing that? Because if I went, I was brand new and they were like, you know, we always stay an extra day here and take everything down. I go, bye. Yeah. What do you have your fucking mind? I think if they started trashing the place, the state. or the city or something would do something to stop it.

Correct. I think part of it is that they do leave no trace. Yeah, I just assume that that my garbage isn't going to be the thing that puts it over the top, though. So I'm going to go, oh, well, this stays, and I'll be back next year if this doesn't get you fucking ruined. I hope my bag of chips doesn't ruin burning, man. You're just going to clean up your stuff and take it out with you.

Nah, dude. You're going to leave your trash? God's ashtray. Oh, my God. It's a dust bowl. That's crazy. My friend Bobby's bouncing. and around in a fucking unicorn costume while I'm DJing.

None of it makes any sense. Leaving. All right, what's the next one? Participation. This is the one. Members are committed to a radically participatory, ethic of doing, creating, and getting involved firsthand. What does that mean?

He's got to do the stuff. They want you to do stuff. Yeah, they want you to DJ or put on a show or bring your robot or do some weird day. You can't just go to it? Has anybody done a stand-up at Burning Man? What a terrible idea. I'm sure somebody's done some sort of thing.

No, you defend everybody. Let's bring it, dude. No. We'll get fucking murdered. Why? Just make jokes about the... Dude, 75% of everybody is white. They're all white.

What are they going to do? Everyone's white. Who are you going to offend, dude? The 8% black people? You're not going to get people mad. The 2% Chinese? You're just going to get a lot of huffing and puffing. Oh, my God.

You're going to see dust fly up every time? This is against all of our principles. Well, they're actually all probably Republicans now. Really? Because they're all rich people. says. Yeah. Oh, let's play these people talking about Tim's party.

Somehow we never got to that. You went to Virginia Beach Funnybone this weekend. I did. Did you love it? Yeah. They moved locations and it's... Oh, it's not the same place? It's across the street.

Okay. Different, like, kind of strip mall area. Yeah. But it's great, great room. No more balcony, which is good. Big still, I think, $4.50. Wow. That's so big.

Yeah. Is that old guy still there? Like the, you kind of like... Your uncle who comes to judge people at their shows? No. There was some guy working there when I... Last time I worked there was some... I don't know.

Wasn't one of the managers, but he was a little, you know, cookie, crazy? I don't know. No, no. I actually had Carlos Miancia take one of my shows on Saturday when I was there last. Really? They called me up on, I think it was Thursday night. They're like, listen, Carlos is coming in town.

And he's going to do the 8 o'clock on... Oh, the 7th. on Saturday, you're still gonna get the same money. And you don't have to do the show. And I was like, just let me go home. Let them have both shows. And they were like, you can do the same. And we'll just pay, I go do just, let me just, let me just go home.

I just didn't want to be around with him watching my set. I didn't want to be around. I didn't want to have to be like. I wasn't even thinking about that. I was thinking like, why wouldn't you just do your other show? I just didn't want to have to, hey, how are you? I didn't want to do that. I don't know.

Was that that time when you was getting a little bit. Yeah. That was a pretty good joke about your personal life. You know, I'm going to change it from marshmallows to cheese. Marshmellitos. Yeah, marshmallitos and... Marshmelito. Hachapal la la la place.

Hachapolees. Last time I was there, this one, I was actually really in shape, and I hired a trainer to work me out. And I told him, I go, listen, I want you. to, I want to throw up. I want you to fucking push me as hot as you can. And he did. I was in the little gym right down the street,

and I worked out so hard, I literally got sick. And I was in the bathroom, and I looked over, and there was a, it was a retarded man, like, in his underwear. I don't think you can say that anymore. He was mentally handicapped man. Goofs?

I think we've landed on, Are you sure? I don't know for sure. Don't fucking hold me to the colds over that, but I'm pretty sure goofs is what you say now. There was a goof. I'm not saying that. Just a goof.

There was a big goofy guy. Goof ball. Goof ball. Goof ball next to you. It was just me and him in the locker room. And he was in his underwear. And he was just staring at me. And he goes, excuse me.

Can you please help me? And I was like, yeah, man, what do you need? He goes, he was, and I looked, he was standing on the scale. And he goes, but he was kind of fat, so he couldn't see how much you weighed. He goes, can't tell me how my way. I can't tell me how my stomach. You're like, 2,000 pounds, buddy. One metric ton.

I went over it, but I had to get, like, close, you know what I mean? He was just in his underwear, and he had, like, a half semi. And I was, like, I should have said no, right? Yeah. I didn't. Oh. Yeah. This is why you're going to flourish a burning man.

It's this kind of behavior. Yeah, I shouldn't. So you're saying I shouldn't have sex with him? No. Okay. I did not know this world was going. I made the wrong choice. I made the wrong choice.

That's fucking crazy. I did make it a man. He was very happy, though. Yeah? Yay. Nobody did. He asked me to look and I felt so weird because somebody walked in and I was just looking at his, the scale. From the ground?

I was standing up and I was just looking down at the scale. ground but if you walked in it just looked like from behind i'm just looking at his dick his dick yeah which you also would have goofball dick could be exciting why i don't know because you don't know what it's gonna be yeah you don't know it's like it could be teeny tiny like you assume it's gonna be retarded also but it could in one way or other it could be teeny tiny or it could be so over the topic remember uh medicated pete on stern show and he would always come in and he's he has like a 10 inch flaccid dick And he just has no idea how to even speak. Yeah.

Remember Bobo's little tiny thing? Yeah. I was there for the Bobop up and down game. Oh, God. No one remembers. No one remembers. Here we go. Who's Who of Who's That?

Everybody there was from Central casting. A real who's who of who gives the shit. A real who's who of who the fuck cares. Yeah, it's like there's a photographer's there because who would they take a picture of? And you know, when we pulled up, I was like, I hope there's yonder bags for the phones. I hope they put stickers on the cameras because I was like y'all I don't want to be seeing

Kikii and with Ann Coulter You know me and Anne Finna You know Cagga cagga like Was like me and Candice Owens is gonna key Like I was like I was like It's gonna be like a strange key Like I was I was we were went

Because we were like This is gonna be a strange Kiki Yeah Imagine my friends I don't know what the Kiki is He's like vibe I'm gonna throw up What I'm gonna I'm

It's a weird if I'm gathering that right Well it sounds like context It sounds like hanging with I can't I can't. I'm sorry. She also said Fina. She looks like that. I can't.

I can't. I can't. Are we not saying words anymore? Well, Finna's like, I guess it's always been around. Like hella. What? No, it's just Gunna, but Finna. And it's urban, but now she's saying it.

So instead of saying I'm going to, you say finna? Yeah. Yeah. Well, it's, like I'm thinking about, I'm fitting to. In the South would be I'm fixing to. I don't mind. fix into that's kind of cool finna is not a word but it's like hello people say hello hello what hella anything hell it's hell it's just hello that's hell what you say hellah that's hella good that's

hella good it's hell aloud it's like wicked but hella yeah it's like you're dumb wicked dude wicked is a word stupid though it's in the dictionary it has a meaning hell it's probably it's not the right meaning it is the right wicked fucking piss it dude yeah it doesn't means it's awesome yeah but wicked wicked is evil not when you apply it to something good it's something good The Boston shit. Well, it's like when you say bad, bad when someone's all that's bad, but bad meaning good, not bad meaning bad. Right. So when you say when Michael Jackson's bad, he meant that he was good.

Right. But it turned out, he was bad. Real bad. Hmm. So wicked is just wicked. So if someone's a wicked pisser, it's an evil pisser. But I'm sure a couple times it was good. Maybe.

I'm sure he was gentle. He did like kids. Oh, whoa. Kiki? What's a Kiki? I think that key. Key, what does that mean? Well.

K-E-E is what I would say if I is. Wow, man. K-K-K-I-K-I. I'm finished. That's not what this is. None of this is that. I think they're saying key. Are you having urban dictionary?

It's Kiki. Blacklow, are you going to let your kids speak like this? Are you going to put a stop to it? Oh, my kid will never speak like this. Yeah, never. Ever, ever in my life when my kid go Kiki, Finn. John. Won't do it.

I won't allow it. Oh, Max probably says. Yeah, I bet Max says. No, he does. No, 100%. Do you think he doesn't talk different behind your back? Are you crazy?

Yeah. I'm telling you right now. Isabel is a code switcher? Oh, is she? She's a code switcher? My God. Isabelle spends 80% of her life in full blackson, I believe. I think it's a little more than that.

Do we never find Kiki? I don't know why Urban. All right, let's just go back and listen to this fit. Let's fin. It's giving me plus signs. I'm not touching the key. Can we fin? Can we fin?

Can we fin? A phrase again for Kiki in? Kiki. I thought it was going to be in a weird key. A weird Kiki. A Kiki is a casual gathering of close friends for chatting, laughing, and sharing gossip. But how does it?

I don't know why it's so difficult. It's very, it's right here. I found it in two seconds. It's a slang term meaning laughing, giggling, having an informal gathering. You're hanging out with, like I said. So you're kikiing? but what like usually things like bad meaning I'm angry at Bob I'm angry at Bobby so I'm not going to be sitting around

key keying with them all night I'm not going to be key but where does the origin come from I don't understand how they put that together I could even begin to guess why you're looking no but you're looking for like you're looking for logic where there lies none no it says the origin and meaning ballroom country the term comes from the black and Latin LGBT Q plus drag ballroom scene in the 80s and 90s? I've been to many gay bars and they've always been all

inclusive. Nice. But have they been Kiki? That is probably right though. That's probably, yeah. It's a drag queen term. I just want to know you don't just say Kiki and say this is what it means. It's got to come from somewhere. Yeah, I know it. Christine's really locked into looking up the wrong definition of it. Did she take her

minutes? I don't know. I just asked Urban Dictionary. I'm finding different meanings. You had two people get it in five seconds with a thumb. I figured out of my phone in less than 10 seconds. You want more? Go back to the, go back to the,

let's, this is not a Kiki anymore. Imagine our surprise, we pull up Stan Comedy Club and Restaurant. Stand Comedy Club and Restaurant, Tuesday, 630 crowd. Oh, oh, oh. Not even main room. Upstairs. Daniel Bridge Gad was there. It's like anyone was there.

Little Pete was there. I'm like, should I take out a bug? I do want to kind of know if Little Pete was at Tim's party. I think I'd like to have Little Pete at one of my parties walking around, Little Peting. I don't know who Little Pete is. Oh, you got to get him in your algorithm, buddy. Who's Little Pete?

Oh, Little Pete comedy? He performs the stand, I guess. Little Pete? Oh, is that the muscle guy? No. Oh. And maybe you think he's a muscle guy? Italian?

Is he Italian? Oh, yeah. But he has tight shirts. Go shirt. But his jokes are just almost like more statements? Yeah. Like a statement? Mm-hmm.

He's like, I don't go around with people I don't like. I know this guy. I follow him. He's in my Rith. Well, Pete. Let me hear a little bit. Him and Christy Mutz hanging out. Let me hear it.

Good job. That's a photo. That's a picture. That's a picture. You need one with a button on it. There you go. Start it over. I don't want to cut off his punch.

I don't want to cut off his setup. Then we're going to judge him unfairly. One of my favorite quotes is by the ancient Roman emperor Marcus Aurelius. And the quote says, anything that happens to you has been waiting to happen to you since the beginning of time. Last weekend, one of my stripper chicks came over. We were drunk, we were having sex, and we were getting a little kinky. And I told her to lick my ass. and she did

while I was sitting there getting my ass licked with my legs over my head in the guard post position and thought to myself this girl has been waiting to lick my ass since the beginning of time

is that a mic drop mic drop he bowed he took a bow why they complain about that? Little Pete being at the party, I would have been stoked if Little Pete was at the party. I would have loved it. No, but that girl does not, can't kiki with him.

That's not a gay, safe space, fun safe space. I don't see Lil Pete and her key. I can kiki with little Pete. I can kiki with all these people, probably. She's adorable, by the way. The girl talking? She's adorable. That little pixie look, that little nerdy.

Pixie look. Okay. What are you doing? Don't do that shit to me. Make me look like a pervert. I just said she's cute. You're purving out on this fucking weird. I'm not purving out.

I mean, I don't know if she's got a girl. This girl couldn't look more, this girl couldn't look more like a girl who's but to have you up on charges for saying you think she's cute. All right. I apologize. Oh, I'm fucking cute. Just like some fucking thing.

Just like a cute thing, like a dog, like a cat. She's wearing barrettes. Yeah, have fun, Bobby. Have fun, wooing her with your fucking 70s, 80s and 90s sensibilities. Let me tell you something. Yeah, win her over. I don't know. I don't know.

lick my ass because you were meant to do this from the beginning of time. I remember a time when you brought a girl to open for you and she would just suck your fucking cock. Now I got a kiki with you. I didn't say, I just said she's cute. That's it. Uh-huh. Not funny at all. Just talk about her looks.

I've never seen her stand. You've trivialized her down to looks. And she probably loves that. I say if she, you know what's funny? All of her buttons are buttoned and I feel like if they would have added one more button, she would have buttoned that too. She just wants all the buttons button I mean she's got an attitude I like her little attitude

Sure I like her little Uh This feels like a little uh This feels like a conversation If I got to have it in a room Not on the thing I'd be like nice I go roll tell me all the dish I'm surprised we're doing it

I go ahead How is this gonna look that I'm going here Maybe it's gonna be a conservative We thought about It's a real who's who of who's that Nah that's nothing I think it goes on and on Really?

But, like, I think so. But, again, I don't know. They might be really good friends with Tim, and it's like a ball bust. I really don't know. It's like something I would not know. I mean, we would have been talking about the same shit after the thing, but we would have never done it on a podcast. Yeah, well, if we did it, everybody would have been on the podcast together. Yeah.

But there also wouldn't have been, but I also wouldn't have had parties where there's people that I don't know enough at the party that they would do a hate podcast about me. I am glad, unlike you. I'm like you. I'm glad I didn't go because I wouldn't want to be part of this little range. A who's who of who. I'm like, aw. What am I going to go over and take a picture, photo up with Big J. Ogerson? I'm like, are you fucking glasses, bitch?

Bobby, we get it, you vulnerable. Mushmeli-oh. Shut up. She's an actress. Really? Yeah, she's actually been in. A lot of stuff. Yeah.

Seems like she's more actress than. What's your name? Ivy. I don't know. Ivy woke. Oh, shit. The last name's woke. Did she change it after she canceled the bunch of guys?

Am I in trouble? Am I in trouble? She has a lot of stuff. Yeah. Yeah, she's been a lot of stuff. That's what I meant. I didn't mean cute. She has a...

She's going to ruin you. Forget it. It's over. I know, we got to wrap this bitch up. What a fun first day back. We... Yo. We'll be back tomorrow.

With a live show at 5 p.m. Eastern Standard Time. Bobby, put on your unicorn outfit. Your unicorn boy. You should DJ. at Skangfest this year. I should. But you should get an outfit.

Yeah, I will. You're unicorn boy, though. I'll dance next year if you get me the boots and the unicorn pants. Whole thing. But I want a unicorn. From my head. Of course. Your unicorn boy.

All right. But a shirt. Vest. I'll do vest. I'm not going to make you go scantily clad. I want you to be comfortable. I like my idea is about being comfortable and really like to. I need my arms out.

Living out loud, yeah. Yeah, I got to have my arms out. I know. We got to do a reach. We got a fin out. All right. Goodbye, everybody. We'll be back tomorrow.