The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Children of the Chalk (feat. Katherine Blanford)

Episode Date: November 8, 2023

Katherine Blanford visits for the first time as the guys read "Slurs For White People" on TikTok.

I'm Bobby Kelly and it's Big J. Ocarson. We're actually a full radio show on Series XM, not just the podcast. For full episodes of the Bonfire, you can listen on the Series XM app. Go to seriesexm.com slash Bonfire for a special offer. And now the Bonfire with Big J. Ocarson and Robert Kelly. Well, I want to hear these slurs. We're people. So we got to start at a these are. I think I think hilarious. Made me laugh. So let me say we think you're going to be wrong.

I thought I thought it would be offended at a couple of me like what the fuck? Really? Not one of them. Not one of them made me offended. And they all were really funny. Very funny. Here we go.

Ready? This girl's got a hot. Black lutes look at a pen and paper. Yeah, just you know he has it on like a in a book somewhere in his house that they all add to once a month. Just see it makes his way around. Yeah, it just makes his way around. Send this on to another brother, brother. Ha ha ha. I said. I got you. We don't gatekeeper around here.

Y'all can say this video if you want to or you can pause it. Just see. Pause it. Pause it. Let's go through these. Jay, please. Please Jay. A.

Ash ape. love that. Love the second one's my favorite out of the gate. Arctic Menace. What's up? That one's even a little forced. I like it though. It's pretty good. The word menace. We're already over to B. We're out of, why people insult star today. B though is pretty thick. Starting off with baking soda slugs.

This one really got me beach flamingos. I don't mind that. That was good. Birch trees. Next one's great. This one's great. Bird caca or bird shit. Yeah, that was so funny.

I don't like going to that mall. So I'll fill a bird shit. Blanco bullies. It was okay. Blanket banshee's, okay. Bleached balloons, not bad. How about bleached demons? Yeah.

I was all right. Blizzard bliss. They're all over the place now. I like this one though. Borax bats. Okay. Now Bliss, they're all over the place now. I like this one though, Borax Bats. Okay. Now here, this is a goodie. Bleach Snow Monkey.

That, a real BSN, I don't mind that one at all. You can already make it an acronym, you know that's a good one. We have Catherine Blanford coming in for the second hour. I'm gonna call her at least 17 of these things. I'm going to call this one capital climbers. Call a flower conqueror. I'll definitely some sort of a day term. Collie flower. We really dig conquer the Collie flower though. That's the thing. Collie flower crunchies. That's a good one. That's all right. And then I play good with the next.

Here we go. Yeah, she goes to the next. Does she read them all? Um, no, she doesn't. Here we go. Okay. Uh, Casper Crickets. I don't mind that.

I don't mind that. Caved Wellers. It's okay. Um, chalk children. I'll go through actually, chalk children, chalk chihuahua and chalk chimps. The Holy Trinity of Chalks. Yeah, I'm going to switch over to

cheddar cheese chimps. Okay. That's my new favorite now. The triple C's? I will say a lot of these suck, but I have a brand new favorite every seven Cheddar cheese chimps The alliterations phenomenal Children up the chalk

So far that's my favorite so far that's my favorite Jotal the chocolate's great. Oh shit clear people Cloudy with a chance of colonization to wordy to wordy to wordy, but Like cocaine monkeys That's a white people thing but I'll tell you what's so funny is One thing that went in I went in when Eric dude moment. I wish I would did you see it go in? Thank you. That's good. That's good. Someone's got to see it for a dude moment. Okay. Got to see it. I got a video Oh, you think it's is it have the whole thing? I don't know. It's so dark in here

No, it's Faratu that this video is not gonna work. Oh, sorry I'm gonna light up the oh It has light mode. No, it's fine. No, it's okay. I like it like that. I don't care I was I've been here since two I'm tired. I'm tired. People to see how much of a Chitter-Cheese Chimp I am in these lights. The people see what a church she's You got him useless crayon Jay look is gonna laugh at me Just a flavor skittled

Child is the chalk if you will What was what was the best one? What was the best one after seeing I should have wrote them down But I mean a couple of them out of the gates were just great. Oh my god Because when she was making the list she was on fire Yeah, and then just as she went on she goes this wasn't a great idea. I've already committed to the TikTok video But like yeah, I have to see the list again But I could tell you quickly if you want to go back Christine not not to be not to go all Right wing dude, but could you imagine doing this with any other Really yeah, let's have ethnic slurs. Wow for white people over this a long time ago. No for everybody for everybody

Well, we can't do that. We we learn now. We learn how lesson J J look at me J look at my finger look at my finger follow my finger Look at me Jay look at my finger look at my finger follow my finger look at my finger Okay, you can say it now we've given them warning you It's none of these can I see that where is that? Oh, let me share it It's... I like the eliteration ones. I like the Casper Crickets chalk children. Chitter-cheese chimp, so...

Is my favorite up to that point. I did like the... What was the... The cauliflower one was good too. A cauliflower... Conqueror good to a cauliflower conquerors? Call of flowers conquerors. Yeah, I like that one Geek on because you go through them quick guys, but I think cheddar cheese chimps was my favorite what some time I

Mean I remembered it Casper crickets was good though Casper crickets was good. Yeah drywall dry chicken munches. I think oh Dry chicken muncher. I like but that's more of like a finger point one you know i mean like this how would you say that in a sentence if you gonna call a white dude something uh... oh yeah i gotta go to my friend from works barbacu is gonna be a bunch of drive chicken munchers sitting around uh... in a pool and i can't get my weave wet it was a run-on sentence for sure it is definitely good

dandruff clumps um... It was a run-on sentence for sure. It is definitely good. Dan of Clemson. Um, okay, I remember the R's were big. R's were big. The clue-clux clam ones I didn't think were that great. Milk maggots. I thought they were good A's and B's. There were, there were some, but I just up to that point though. Cheddar cheese, chimps was my favorite.

Ranch, Ranch roaches, Ranch rats, ranch raccoons, or I like all of those. Seasonally challenged is pretty good. It's pretty great. It's seasonally challenged people. Yeah, set them. Set them into snowman. Set them into snowman.

It's good. Keep going, we'll go one more. Snow, yeah, the snow rat and snow roach. Snow apes. Snow apes is my favorite thing to call white people. Snow apes, I'm thinking useless crayons. And a table salt tamis is a good one. Table salt tamis is good.

That sounds like a can, like a can in term. That's her warm pants. Do you have vanilla gorillas Yeah, vanilla gorillas. Vanilla gorillas. Vanilla gorilla. That's how you'd say it, right? Vanilla gorilla. Oh, wow, god damn it, maybe.

Left. Yeah, it's a fantastic subject. Yeah, we gotta come up with some moses. If you got any zis. Well, we have to take a break because we're being responsible. You know, oh, it's just a couple of ranch rats over here. Yeah. Yeah, just coming from your main cheddar cheese champ. Yeah. And you useless crayon RK. The couple of mayo packets hanging out. No, his juice.

It's the Bonfire Faction Talk Series X. I'm one of three. Couple of cabinets. Conor. Now a cauliflower. We have a great guest everybody. I just had the pleasure of getting nowhere and work with her on the fully loaded cruise. She's going to be headlining the Laurie Beacham Theatre as part of the New York comedy festival tomorrow night at 7 p.m. everybody and you can get tickets at the NY comedy festival.com It's the hilarious Catherine Blanford everybody. What's your Instagram social media so then go there and get tickets easier. At it's Catherine Blanford on Instagram. Yeah go there. Get tickets easier. Go to our website. It's probably easier than their

site correct? Yeah. Oh it's not it doesn't exist on their website at all This is they don't want me here But against all odds Comed festivals a little discombobulators. It's a weird city to do it It's only because when they do festivals in other cities that's the only thing going on you doing a thing in New York City How they have another thing called Broadway? on. You're doing a thing in New York City. Are they have another thing called Broadway? But it's not just that. Yeah. If you do it in other cities, it's also like there's a comedy club or two in town. And now there's like a whole thing happening at multiple venues. I get that. This is just what New York sort of always is. So there's no sense of urgency for like,

you know, we're at the festival. I got to go all these festival shows. It's just like, these are shows that are happening and they're all great shows Nothing to do with that. I feel like yeah, it's I think it's I feel like it's a bunch of comics extra comics came into town Added extra shows, but the audience is still the same The demand is still the same as it was any other time right? Yeah, you know the supply has gone up the demand is the same I like that. I like a little hand thing you know this is this does this makes sense? Yeah, Bobby's it very Bobby's a very hand expressive gentleman I know before when you like are we we're not we're not on and I was I was freaking out

She's a very I like a yeah, I'm all faulty fingers early as a Bobby you like to live out loud My relationship is out loud, but I like her a OC Making my claws my aoc cloth I've never seen it down like loud, but I like her AOC making a point. My claws, my AOC claw? Your AOC claw. I've never seen it down like that, but that was very descriptive. Yeah, yeah, yeah. AOC claw upside down. I'm AOC's evil step sister.

So mine goes here. Catherine, I were talking, we were being on the fully loaded cruise that right afterwards. I saw the schedules up until I knew some people that were on it, it was like, Lama God, it was called the heavy headbangers boat, and it was guar, and it got mastodon and a couple of metal bands, and somebody went over, like in the middle of like the day at sea thing, and like, that's certain death.

They talked about in the article, like they were like, he's missing still, but it's a wash, it's over. Yeah, I love when they go, it's over. Yeah. I love when they go, I haven't found him yet. I haven't yet. Whatever. Right. And I said, I'm highly jealous.

It wasn't our boat. Yeah. And then we would all have to compete for the bit. The race, the race of the story. And I think Mark Roman would win. He goes fast yeah nice gay fell off second day yeah I'm coming Thomas Thomas through my board I'm uh that's gotta be like the best case in there they've got to turn the

fucking cruise ship around his wife of the back Harold you dumb idiot oh god leave me out here holding on to our Louisville. Oh God, leave me out here. I'm fine. That must be the worst thing though, when you fall off, you don't die when you fall off, and you just see the boat cruising away. You're like, well, I'm just waiting to die. And it's like Lamb of God or whatever.

Like slowly going in the background. But it leaving like, okay. Okay. And then what he does that does at one point is he go, oh, they're playing Walk With Me In Hell. Shit. Here you go. Let me take it out.

Take me out. Take me out. Take me out. Oh man, no way. They haven't played this live since 2007. Wow. That's when you hold a shark by two right then. man, no way. They haven't played this live since 2007. That's when you hope a shark bites you right then. It just reaches the water and takes you out one shot.

A death at sea. It's a and by the way, why some a cruise ship couldn't be more set up for intrusive thoughts of that thing. Like you are constantly in a very simple, pretty easy mistake, drunken mistake for sure of just going right over the side. I thought about it. Jesus Christ. I thought about it every time I was in the balcony, I was like, isn't it just weird that if you were like, I had a moments thing of like insanity, like, fuck, I'm just going to do it.

You're dead. It's so quick. There's not one person on that boat didn't think about it. It's like when you, you stand over a really high balcony or something. You look over and you go, but we were pussies and headmangers boat brought the heat. Finally, is there any follow up on that story? They called off the search. Yeah. So, so did they, they didn't find him? No. Unsuccessful search. Anything about a wife or anything? 41 years old. Yeah, so they did they they didn't find him now unsuccessful search Anything about a wife or anything 41 years old does a ship have to turn around a stop It doesn't visit fast like I couldn't tell you where the drivers at

Like I have no idea No, that thing is so you mean the captain no, I call them the driver driver Is that a Uber in the captain. No, I call him the driver driver. He's at an Uber. Uber ship basically. My app doesn't say where my driver's name is. Is my driver Captain John something amazing Captain John Spalding? Did you see him go over? Somebody saw him go over. They notified the ship and then they notified the Coast Guard. So it sounds like the ship doesn't shut stop They just can't go and they just can't they like

Just shut the engines off. No, I know but the thing's so big like you wouldn't pinpoint where he's you know I mean yeah, well that man he died immediately because though if somebody saw him fall and then he was still living Right, he was still like treading water. They could have gotten him We saw that we saw the little do you saw the like booze or whatever with the little life they would have gotten one of those boats and gotten him. So if he fell over and they still didn't find him, that means he was, he was dead on impact. Sucked under maybe.

Yeah. That must be it. There must be some unwritten captain rule where it's like, look, some of falls off. We just keep going. We, we technically call the Coast Guard It's on them, but you're dead you're dead. Yeah, it's a wait to time to spin the boat around They know once you go down your dad is a technicality that you're but they have to probably call the Coast Guard It'd be like yeah see if there's a body, but that dude's probably in the rutters and they already thinking you got chewed up by the propellers

That's a gross thought. Oh, no, that's a happy thought That's that's a quick guess what get you off She's a OC hands just get killed by The only way I can come I thought about dying the whole cruise I hope it's on like one or slow speed so it's I hope it's on like one a slow speed so it's slow Yeah, he's one slice the legs my legs and now my hands I don't know heavy metal at all that was good

I can I say this cuz so our our boat Have you talked about it at all? Yeah, So we had Yacht Rock. Rock, rock, rock. Yacht Rock. And if you would have lined up every man on that boat and been like, who's going to know every word? Jay would be my last guest. 100%. But Jay knew every word. He is a savanna. Everything. I even, like, there would be songs like, I don't know the song in my back. There's no way he knows knows this song and I would look over and he wouldn't be moving his mouth for a second but that's just because he had a cigarette. Jay looks like he he should work a journey in the mall. Yeah, but he is a savant when it comes to music and he's changed my life. Driving with Jay in the

car has changed my life and changed my view on him. He knows every song there is and he knows how to, he knows how to make you feel. Like you could be like he can make you feel tired, he can make you feel happy, he can make you feel rock and roll, he can change your mood. See you. We actually left our house leaving this song was on for our dog. We actually left our house leaving this song was on for our dog Now Jay is a very interesting guys. He's he's complicated very complicated. I listen to it a half hour

Barber strison interview today. Yeah, what was saying is Jay's gay inside? Yeah, well, I'm no a lot of it is I've had a weird like stages of my life of influence So it was just my grandparents, when I was like young, young, and my mom was young. And then my grandfather died and it was for many years then me, my grandmother, and my mom, I mean, different like a house, but like I went back and forth a lot. And so very female influence,

and then my step-pop came, who was like, even all those things have like a music influence to him, like what I listened to. That's crazy. That's why I don't know, don't sit under the apple tree with anyone else but me also. Because my grandfather's like, big band music,

like Glenn Miller's shit. What? Did you guys ever just talk or were you just playing music? You don't hit a record player in J's house? Yeah. Oh yeah. My mom had a record player, but's house. Yeah. Oh, yeah. My mom had a record player, but very few records. She had the one with Lana Richie with his hands in his pockets wearing yellow sweater vests.

I remember that one. The Comma Doors. Great. Oh, I love that band. Toto. Toto. Is Toto? They're the Africa?

Yeah. Yeah. They're on Africans. Not Africans. But they know Africa. But they know Africa. They know Africa. Easy there. No one's ever Discussed no one's ever No one's ever described it better

They we could say they discovered it. Yeah, I see Jay like back in the day you you walked to school and like a tuxedo And you were actually close it was a karate key. What is that like a tucked in it tucked into his jeans? Yeah, that was before you get crazy. I did that one day and I learned very quick. Patrick's Wazey wore that at the end of Roadhouse. Is that the that's the the stiff white and it just crosses over? Yes, yeah, like a robe. Yes, but he tucked his in. And I took what jeans? And then I tucked mine into jeans and went to school and as a little fat kid as the ghee rises up and opens up and you just see my little fat little piggy tits. And I just would and then I realized that that's how I looked

and I'm sitting down with a shirt that's like half open and I just made excuses to leave school. I tried everything. I did stone wash jeans and they were too stone to wash and when I'd been over the ass just blasted out of them. Jay would you shit his pants in school and go have to go home? Whatever had to get me out of there. Now the music makes sense because you would go home and you'd be like, I'm gonna play my grandmothers music right now. Oh yeah, it does.

Like some of these records. Yeah. See, see, see it. Is that it? I never thought that was a key. I just thought he was wearing some jerk off shirt. No. That was a key.

Yeah, karate key. But that looked like a thin one, like a windbreaker. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh yeah, mine was thick-gear. He had winter gear on it. That's summer gear. So yeah, you're right. So, I don't know if I've even overthought

that in the story. Definitely in my jeans, I was wearing a fucking diaper problem. It's tucked in. It's so thick. It's probably the blast in the ass out of my stone washes. I was your teacher, I would assume that your mom kicked you out of the house. That was the only thing you could find on the street.

Or he's a master. He's a karate master. I do think my mom got me. You need to be like worried or fucking petrified. I'm not fucking with that chubby kid with a, a gay tech, he was fucking Lee Jeans. I think my mom sent me to school in her leggings or some kind of like, not leggings, but like sweatpants.

Sweatpants instead they were, that was the unisex. You got hit with that at some point, Bobby, the unisex. I told you, I went to Pier 1 imports and bought, when hammered pants were on the out, and you couldn't find them because nobody was wearing them I bought them at pair one imports, but they were women's linen baggy pants I wear the poster store. That's a furniture store. Yeah, but they sold pants one pair of pants linen they sold they sold a few a few linen I bought a pop-a-sign and women's pants And I wore them to school.

To college, by the way, fucking college. I wore them when you're supposed to be out of that phase. So you jumped into them. Yeah, I wore Army Green, linen pants. No, you wore a bed skirt. I wore those right there, those, but they were Army Green and yeah, I wore sneakers.

Yeah. You weren't an fraternity. I've never been freer though. I mean, God those pants are awesome. I get a pair of hammer pants, but my parents, like thankfully, mom and step-up laughed me out of the day I got them. Yeah. So I never tried to get it.

But my grandmother got a pair to walk around the school yard with her friends with, and then they did commit to that. My grandmother did walk around the school yard in hammerpants two years with my anonita. Yeah, but how's the need to do it? Is she good? Still alive?

I tell her I said hi. I will do. Thanks. Could whites wear those? Don't say it like that. No, you said it exactly right. And the answer is no. You mean useless crayons?

Whites, we yeah. Oh, Mayo packets. I don't know about that Couple of snow apes to sitting a couple of snow apes that we are Couple ash apes. We just watched a A video a TikTok video that where a girl gives alphabetically a through Z the what she considers to be the best insult slurs for white people And I they just can't they can't make an offensive one up that hits white people at all. I mean, unless you're an idiot, like you have to be you have to be a dumb Italian to get upset about slurs apparently. What do you think she would be though?

What would she be? She would definitely be a what was the chicken? What was the chicken one? Oh, dry chicken muncher. Yeah, you'd be a you'd be a dry chicken munch That's the D's I'm like gay Yeah, it's not what they mean. They just mean you like me. You probably don't know how to make chicken juicy It's what yeah, it's right on the nose a lot of these. Yeah, you like you like the chicken and a Greek salad is what it means

Oh, yeah, I go just put just have a little boss on it. That's fine. Yeah, dry chicken munchers discharge demons. That's a good one. Pretty gross. Oh, I love that. But that's just everybody. Yeah, everyone's a discharge. That's what I'm saying. Some of these don't hold this. Listen, this woman's not the brightest bulb in the lamp. Yes. Are they just saying the the easy? Okay, here here we go can I say this here? I don't know out of this Let me just say out of thing you can see whatever you want. Let me just see your repercussions. Let me just say this Don't say whatever you want

Look at Jacob say okay. I'm gonna say this. This is this is how you can say that white people are discharge Demons because everybody comes out of discharge But we're on we're the demons. You know what I'm saying? I get it. You totally can say that we are the demons. Yeah. Yeah. You just see us.

I'd that one. Blue eye devils. Yeah. Yeah. That's, yeah. I liked it. Um, but yeah, anyone with ape at the end or a iteration made me happy. Okay.

Cheddar cheese chimps. That was a go on. That's not that's pretty. That's pretty great. That's pretty. That's that's flavorful though. It's very flavorful. It's orange. It's there's so much going on there wrong, but I think she was proud of herself for the eliteration. Cheddar cheese chips. Yeah. I just was there anyone's about how like we can't dance. Yeah. Sure. There's a one about the one for Jay. There's only one Jay. And it was Jameless Gypsies.

That's a good one. That's good. It wasn't great. I like Jam- I like the word Gypsies in anything. And Jameless is pretty good too. Two good words put together. Almost like a Reese's. I hear I can't say Gypsies.

Why? You can do it if you're talking about white people. They don't have, they only have ham radios. You're not gonna hear us. Yeah, okay. Yeah, I'm, yeah. Is gypsies a bad term? I always hear that. I've said I'm not allowed to say it.

And there was a bad term. Where are you from? Where are you living right now? LA. Yeah, that's why. I have another one I want to bring up. Well, oh God. Why someone don't know why you can't say gypsy?

When is that a bad term? I've always had to. They took gypsy away to they that they found it well I think it was white people who's founded offensive towards gypsies the G word the G word yeah yeah can't call it gypsy gypsy because Rome it erases Romania women I feel like they've already been erased how so I haven't heard a long time she said I feel like they've already been erased. How so? I haven't heard in a long time. She said I feel like they've already been erased. I haven't heard about them in a long time. Yeah, since Count Dracula.

I know. I think, I think after Stessie me street, they're done. Is this the holo blue? They say to you, while their children go through your pockets when they hand you a baby. Yes. Allabaloo they say to you are their children go through your pockets when they hand you a baby. Yeah Romani with so gypsy's a slur for Romani well look oh Romani, yeah, I've never said that word I get told By upper management. I can't say gypsy. I'm saying gypsy you guys can't stop me. It's live. Yeah, but live. What you think about that? I? Don't know why to slow I thought it means Jacob

Can I ask about one that I said out loud and then I went I don't know from about to say ever my lot of says There was a man. I was at the stand on it. There was I'm kind of nervous. I can say that this is somewhat more quick Do you do you want to take a vacation? Do you need time off? No? No, no, I just quick, do you, do you want to take a vacation? Do you need time off? No, no, no, no. I'll get it. I just believe in free speech, bro. Ah, yeah, man. Sorry.

I know corporate Jacob and corporate Lou over here. Do we have the ties? Can they put the ties on real quick? They play by the rules. Big J.M.R. bosses never mentioned the G word. Okay, there you go. Yeah, so I guess we're okay. Hang on, we have the ties.

Let's put the ties on just in case we know. Oh yeah, guys, put your ties on just so you know, you know, so when the video comes out, they know that you guys weren't behind this yes, we know that you guys are Corbin have your tie Jacobs You're in the mix with us then you got it and you got a loosen it so you can show that it was making you Don't worry DJ Lou has his art. He's wearing his tie. So he's a stool pigeon, but go ahead I say you got you got paisley's on yours too which shows which shows your your business but you're cool about it what we're gonna say you're on the way here

and couple yeah wife-beater one on the one and then oh I'm kind of nervous to say this and they need a pico over the wife-be theater and I said he looks like a j crew Don't I'm nervous. They should be I shouldn't say it. We're all nervous Don't what is it right? W. I G. G. Oh, Wigger. Yeah, that's come on again. That's nothing guys No, look at look how tight his tie is now We could change the name of this show to two Wiggers no one would get it doesn't hurt anybody. I mean, I wouldn't believe it

First nobody at all you think so I know They wouldn't believe it'd be one Wigger and an old guy Yeah, yeah, what's that power? Yeah, yeah, yeah, and a guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's that power? Yo, yo, yo, and a guy. Yeah, it is kind of empowering to some dudes. Like, yes, I'm accepted. Yeah, to say it. Yeah, yeah, to be called it.

Oh, a wigger? Yeah. Yeah, I think some people do just accept it, but it's never, it's very rarely ever said with like love behind it. You're definitely saying like, that's why this guy sucks. Yeah.

Like that, but I encountered someone, I started comedy, black comedy circuit. So there was a good amount of that. And it was, it was a real, and I still, still pandered. And I mean, but I never talked to, I never like faked the way I talked. You never changed, yeah.

You've always talked this way. Yeah. You've never, you never was a yo, yo, Bob, but yo nice to meet you. Yeah, yeah. Yo man, I talked you never cheat. Yeah, you've always talked this way. Yeah, you've never you never Was a yo yo Bobby yo nice to meet you. Yeah, yeah, yo man I'm a good thing. Oh, yo, that's dope for real Yeah, I would love to talk like that. I know Love it yo Jacob. We had a good lunch today son, right? Yo, Lou hit it What's up? Yo, what'd you get Jacob? You eat all them shits!

So he ate three little balls of chicken. Yo, you had three falafel shits and falafel shits! So he ate it all, motherfucker. You had falafels in the shape of a little dinosaur nuggets. Didn't you? You're a little... Yo, you put them balls in your mouth? This motherfucker scooped up hummus. It was fucking cereal bitch damn These were my favorite movies growing up and this is why I might have done it a little bit

It was Patriot and Burznyu Groove and save the last dance Wait, what was the first one Patriot Emperors New Groove and Save the Last Dance. Wait, what was the first one? Patriot. Okay. But now it gets in. Yeah. Okay, I love that movie. Emperors New.

And do you remember Save the Last Dance? Julius Stiles. Dancing. That guy's an old man now. That guy's an old man now for that movie. Julius Stiles? No, the guy who was in Julius Stiles was the girl. The guy, the black guy.

Derek? Julius Stiles. Julius Stiles looks like a old man now Sean Patrick Thomas yeah Sean Patrick Thomas he doctor all I knew him was was doctor dr. Derek yeah and that was um I think that was the beginning of the end for that's probably why a lot of my generation is the way they are is because of say the last dance it gave us a freedom that we shouldn't have had. To date Black guys young. To dance. To think we could dance.

Yeah. To think we had any culture. To think we, it gave us, you know. Well, I love, it was such a funny switch like those late 90s, early 2000s. It was like all coming together. And then I can't came pinpoint with the moment is where it went from like you'd see white girls with corn rows and all kinds of shit and

it was not a thing like the whole adopted like the clothes, the everything, the baggy shit and then all of a sudden one day they were like wait look at these white bitches you fucking appropriated our culture bitch just snapped. And then they're everything with your piece of shit. And this girl's like, I've been dreadlocking my hair for three years. The greatest video of all was the that white chick who was teaching hip hop dance on YouTube is one of the funniest videos ever.

You ever seen it? There's a white girl, there's a white lady, just a, not a millee maybe a 30 something white lady teaching hip-hop dance moves It is one of the most disturbing beautiful videos I've ever seen You see how my knees pop that's how you can tell you got a pop it. Yeah, you got a pop that's pop pop Oh, it's like an older. I do remember this. Yeah, buddy. This is I remember this is looking cream Look at it outfit though. I think the first thing you need to know about hip hop it's all about your posture and you know growing up my posture was

really bad. My mom used to tell me all the time. Stand up straight. Stand up straight. But now you don't She also told you not to date like day black guys By the way, she has such like she has such like show like show tunes the attitude to and rap and rap and rap and rap and hip and in hop in Wait till she tells you the sounds that you may hip hop is associated with play that why she drinks like a fucking goalie for And you're seeing home soccer team. She's got a church usher pants. She has nine different things. She's like Nancy Redmond, do you remember her? Yeah, she used to wear the little vaporizer around her neck, the smoky, the render neck. Remember that?

Yeah. I play this. Don't make a hip hop. This is the first thing I will say to you. You want to do hip hop? You got to stand like this. So. And a hip hop head we have this

Every time She's doing the food. We gotta put this out from at the bonfire She's she's doing the thing but I can listen that I put it on the audio is great Even if you can't see what she's doing like this Boom-pap doing like this. Oh, that's a bad, just poop at being a poop. Hit it. Hit it.

Hit it. Hit it. By the way, then it's not her. Oh, it's a young boy that looks like her. That's what we call pooping. That's fucking hilarious. No one's ever called that out before. Herit is right here.

Popping. She does popping with sound. Huh? Watch her body. Straight. I went to a clothes club, right? Straight. And on. Dude, her big baggy jacket.

That's a big baggy jacket. It's so fucking funny. Dude, and like? When she looks like flow from Mel's diner. I'm gonna... God, it's these. She's receding gums and big teeth. Oh my God, this chick is nuts.

Mostly Rachel Maddow, quite honestly, is who it looks like. I took some of this from an African piece. Oh, can't say that. It was like Rachel Maddow quite honestly as well looks like. I took some of this from an African piece. Oh, can't say that. This is great. You know, do the 90s rules. This is like Dodo's stepmother. See, there's a difference. The 90s and early odds were the best dude.

There's not one black person in this video. Justin Timberlake was the greatest soul singer of all time. He's spoofed as to where they did this on bus. Yes, this was so good. Walking with one of my arms lower than the other and my foot dragon. Well, that's hip hop. No, that's hip hop.

The other day I was in the grocery store buying some life bulbs and ice cream. And I could tell the cashier didn't like my baggy pants But I didn't care because that's hip-hop That's you and the empty-aid romance Play it, let's see how close it is to the real dick play it It took it out of here. Are you kidding me? This is the cornstree I'm not gonna play the actual video play the actual video This is it I'm into points a lot

She means actually a point and then she's never she's never involved when they start dancing She just goes you point and then this and being bang pop pop pop now take it away Filipino boys What are you gonna do when hip hop goes out? Hip hop is an attitude. It's right here. It's how you feel, it's a style. So I can go out. Hit, hit, ah, ah.

That's it right there. Flex foot, ah, ah. Bit back. I'm gonna add a hit. It's right here in your head. Is this hip hop? Flex foot. Yeah, they should have, if some genius should have went to one of those 50 years of hip hop

concerts that happened last summer and like hacked into the big screens and just played this. This is hip hop. Sorry rock him. Sit still for a minute. Ah, ah, ah. Yeah, ah, they should have got her to come out. Yeah, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, have got her to come out. Yeah, yeah.

Slap foot, slap foot, hit, hit, huh? Guys, this is stop throwing things. This is hip hop. Look at my stance. Look at my, look at my scoliosis back. LL, LL, give me my headset mic back, please. One of our biggest concerns is, what are you going to do when hip hop is over? You're gonna be fine.

Well, that was the best thing. You know, I used to go to that comic, Roger Rod, who I think is out in LA somewhere. Roger Rod was one of those guys. He was an older guy in the black circuit when an older white guy would do it. There's a guy like honest John who was like a hippie sort of thing and he did like, I got what his thing was and he just did the black circuit kind of got popular in that but like, what was the first name I said?

Roger Roddude is, hilarious. I mean, he dressed like this lady and told us jokes all like an inflection stuff. Do you have a Christine? That was one of my favorite things ever. When you got it, he comes out, it's like, oh, who's got jokes is my favorite because he's just doesn't got hip hop set

as like a white guy. And they're like, the white boy. They? Absolutely love it. Yeah. What is this from? Is this me on bad boys' comedy? Ha ha ha ha ha.

Yeah, here it is this the best Yeah, give us a little interview first. It's black audience black folks. Oh got issues. I got issues. We bond it works It's whole alpha. Oh Jesus Christ Let's get the clothes out of the way because I hear this all the time. How come you dress like you're black? Simple answer, I'm trying to meet a white girl. Look at the walk. Wow. This is not-

Rich boss used to do this. He still does. He just sits down now. There's two I just stand and walk around. I've been running for about 12 years. I gotta tell you, I have learned a lot about white people. From listening to black comedies. Here's the cello.

Like I didn't know that when it raised, we all smell like wet dogs. Day. It's funny though, he's not doing, oh shit, take a photo of his, shit, take a picture of his. Get your ass up. But he's not even doing a black comic, you know, he's not here. Oh shit take a photo of his shit take him get your ass up But he's not even doing a black comic. You know, he's doing a female black comic. Yeah, I'll tell you this

Ducks and you know I learned after my brother because sister when a rain sister don't leave the house You know they got the wee thing going on, you know, they do they do they do Some of you need to slow down on him. We use I mean there ain't no tails left You drive by a rancisee Zays all you see your horse booty holes He's doing hand just like a female black comic Hey, you broke ass motherfuckers and let me use my hand. I make my own money. He just does black buzzwords.

Oh yeah. It's all he does. It's exactly the hackiest comedy of the time. The next round, so this show is called Who's Got Jokes. You familiar with the show at all? No. It's one of the best things ever on television. It's two rounds. Two rounds, oh, so by Bill Bellamy,

overseen and judged by Tommy from Martin and three random people from the audience are the judges. And you come out in the first set you do is your material that you got. And then they have you come out for a second round where they throw some sort of a monkey wrench in the works which can be anything from you get hit in the face with a pie or someone heckles you stop it. Someone's ready to heckle you.

A protest comes in for Roger Rods round two they change the audience out and just put it I think it's like 20 children. Oh I think you're going to say white people. No, no, just chug. No, no, no. It was the same faces. They made like It was to put his family It's the budget disappointed white people Roger is this why I pay for you to go to USC

You are a dad you don't get it player. I'm a huge trying to tell my jizzokes. You're in the union You have dental. Roch. Roch, you're children want you to come home. Okay, Debbie's gonna forgive you. I talk to her. Debbie. He's a dentist during the day. Stop acting like a useless crayon.

I get back here. You're being a real snow-aid, dude. You're being a real ranch roach. I started in Atlanta, and there are so many of these guys. But you get a pass. You're doing the easiest. The path ever. But you're never going to like elevate.

No, but the fun, what that's what I thought the fun was was, because I definitely panned, I didn't, nothing like this, but I panned it when I started off for sure. He just looked like he would do stuff like this. Oh, yeah, for sure. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, he was hip hop. Very naturally like, well, no, what happened? Wasn't hip hop fat kid in that time. There was no

Closed like if you went by name brand clothes at all. It had to be hip hop. Yeah, they didn't have DXL back then I would have loved it I would have loved to have like a Led Zeppelin shirt or something But yeah, I'd food along for sure. They'll be those an X they'll be those an XL Well, that's they made me wear that on the bad boys of comedy. She's John Sean John. Yeah, but you can see Can I see something? It says. Seen John is a poster. Okay, but anyone seen John. He's 19. Look at the leather metal wristband coming out of it. Well, I wouldn't have worn that shirt. They made me. That's the point, but I did use to dress much more than that

But not so much that shirt would I've ever worn? My god that shirt is so heavy or two so I wore a hip hop because that was the style stuff you could wear Backed-chid strap is pretty hip hop. Oh, yeah, oh, I wore I'm Jewish. I wore a big chain I sold out I had a big chain with a silver cross on it and stuff, but my comedy I You sold out your religion? Oh, yeah. My comedy, even though in the material was pandering, it just wasn't in. I always thought the lamest thing was then to watch somebody go up there and be like, yo, a lot of fun.

Honey's up in here, you know what I'm saying? And when they talk like that, I'm like, oh, I wonder if I could sort of expose that there. Like I've always thought that kind of a comic is more insulting. Can I listen? I'm like, you're acting like they'll never get your regular old talk unless there, like I've always thought that kind of a comic is more insulting. Can I listen? I'm like, you're acting like they'll never get your regular old talk unless you like go to their level of speaking. I mean, here's some of this.

I want to hear some of this. I have to hear the beginning of this. Can I hear the intro? Sure. Right, the very beginning when they bring them up. Can I leave? No, you can't. You have to sit down.

Do you see this? I mean, I see. Oh, I have to see this. Have you seen this? How many times you watch this? Oh, I probably if once all right Let's let's I've seen this a long time ago. I want to see it again now But hit play Christine When this came out when I was seeing that girl who sent the dick pick around Oh, yeah, yeah, it wasn't great. You're so low at this point No, I had filming filming of this dude. I'm flying high because this really cute

Thin girl is super into me. Let me see this. I'm young Mrs. 20's Fuck a white guy holy shit hey That's right. I'm here Why you holding you stomach? It's fat Holy shit, hey, that's right, I'm here. Why you holding your stomach? It's fat. You're constantly gulging it.

Subliminal, I know. You rub your tinny a little bit, you go, I know, I know. You rubbing your belly like Buddha, you're trying to get luck? This is where my power comes from. I think I'm trying to give a casual, not even really worried about all this. You have two, I mean, your steampunk wristband is nuts.

It did look so steampunk with the shirt I showed up with. Oh, he's like, I feel that in this crowd, I do. I like to see everyone's here though, man. They're black people and white people. I keep tilting my head like a dog. The slainiest shit mixed in. Hey, some other stuff. And them black and white racism.

Is it ever gonna end? No. It's not. It's one thing holding this back. Because if you look at the culture, is there a mix of that? It's gotta be the recording or something that's making my voice ho. You sound, you sound like a baby. No, I think so doesn't get removed. People gotta be the recording or something. It's making my voice hot. You sound, you're doing something like a baby. That's your voice.

No, I think so. It doesn't get removed. People like change the speed a little. I mean, just a little, but it sounds a little bit hot. I don't think your balls dropped at this point. Yeah, baby. He's pretty bossy. You think cigarettes just fucking did me in.

Yeah. No, you didn't. Yeah. Was this, it's hard to tell because you're not in your own shirt, but it looks like you'd already started to cross into more of the metal dressing. You've the wall of chain and the wrist gear. Sure. Yeah.

You think that was to fight your hip hop past? It was to be like, you know what, that's not, I'm not really a Fubu shirts guy. Mm-hmm. And they started making bigger shirts. Yeah. And then they were like, well, for this you are. And they go, this is, this whole show is essentially to promote Sean John Clothing because it's P. Did he's closed? Did you submit your set or did they say this is what we like?

I think they just I think I've just got booked for it I think it was like they were looking for comics to do it. I will not put you through the side Paul This is the worst. I've seen footage of me before and it's it's terrifying you see me sitting up in my chair, bun? Shoulders back. What's it about? It's good, do this, the fears joke, right? The different fears? I don't know.

No, it says pretty girl baggage. I know, but from the start of it. Fear. That black people and white people fear different shit and that's what holds us back. We don't understand each other's fears. That's the truth. Oh, you just said it man good for

you man thanks for bringing us together it'd be a good example those fears oh man you're so my friend Karim he's black he's black oh wait no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no up with the very out of the punchline playout. Sean John 19th Church had ever three in front of the one phone. He wasn't afraid of that shit at all. We back it up. He didn't hear the set up, right? I'm sorry. My fat joke. My fat joke.

Step down. I'm sorry. I had a gun. I got to put a gun out. Karim fist for him. He wasn't afraid of that shit at all. But Karim is petrified of pigeons and squirrels now. Now across the street all that shit all that shit all that shit

All that shit all that shit White people we can understand that shit right can't we we don't know that shit. I'm big J. You're looking my wrist Yeah Roger ride yo check it out. Yo all that shit is different. You know cuz black people like pigeons and shit Everybody thanks for listening that was just a portion of our actual serious XM radio show That shit is different, you know, because black people like pigeons and shit. and updates coming to a city near you. Grab the rattle! BELL RINGS