The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Cruising For NYC Glory

Episode Date: March 20, 2026

A conversation about George Michaels getting arrested leads to a sexy discovery. Christine found a website that maps all the gay meet-up spots in the area. The guys are surprised to learn that they are everywhere. The obvious places are listed such as rest stops and bars but office buildings, fitness centers, and hotels are destinations in plain site. Jay plans to send Jacob to one such joint in his neighborhood so he can see what the fuss is all about. *To hear the full show to go www.siriusxm.com/bonfire to learn more! FOLLOW THE CREW ON SOCIAL MEDIA: @thebonfiresxm @louisjohnson @christinemevans @bigjayoakerson @robertkellylive @louwitzkee @jjbwolf Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of The Bonfire ad-free and a whole week early.  Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

And now, the bonfire with Big J. O'Crison and Robert Kelly. Why, Jay? Damn, that's the thing that sucks the most about being gay is if you're a partner as a stay-at-home dude. I go out and earn money for us every day and some guys going, I know, baby, I appreciate that. But I got to sit here and keep my asshole fucking smooth all day for you. You think that's easy? Sitting here staying prims and asshole loses a goose for? You think it's hard?

Is he putting drops in our little Shih Tzu's eyes? Dude, why do I love George Michael so much? Because he's super handsome, it turns out he was just in the cock the whole time, so he was out of your way. Yeah. You can acknowledge how handsome he was now. So good. You're like, poor ladies.

You never got a slice of that. He's got that five o'clock shadow that shaves in the morning, but it comes in the backed by fucking 9 a.m. I've always liked men. Yeah, I know. This guy couldn't have... The magic! The magic in the house.

Magic doing his work. Magic doing his work. Did we acknowledge Bobby's shirt on air at all? Oh, yeah, I have my... Bear Bear Bear. T-shirt, Kevin, thank you very much. Big fan of the show. Listen to the show. Looks like I'm a master P-rapper.

You gave me my Bear Bear Bear shirt. And it's... Bear Bear Bear. All kinds of versions of Jay over the year. It's a J for every season It's a J at every weight size Every weight size My sexy pictures on there

Which is the funniest ever My sexy I love that that was taken for Wayne Oh wait that picture's there Oh my God Yeah The sexy picture for Wayne My favorite is when you're holding up the iPhone 1

In a mirror of a shitty hotel On a crappy gig You're middling for a towel That's 2000 No that's right after Mayhem Fest tour Oh that's when you became glove man Yeah, right after Man Fest.

Yeah, the gloves were fresh. That might be the original glove. Can I be honest with you? Because I noticed the arm band I'm wearing is a rat dog. And I got that on the tour too. That's a cool fucking logo. Yeah, see, they didn't make any more rat dog fucking arm bands. Those things were the coolest.

You're going to get back into armbands? Oh, well, if I do sleeveless or even T-shirt sometimes, I'll go arm-band. But I don't know. I like covering myself You're a peacocker, dude If I can ever cover my flesh with anything That you don't have to see it And have it with something else

That'd be great You also like when you walk down the street Be like, that's him right there Yeah Well, oh no, rat dogs Rat dogs are band George Michael had the best hair He had the best hair in the business

George Michael The best hair Well, I never like that kind of hair What? No, I didn't like a lot of short feathered back Oh my God. That's Harry Trimida. He highlighted the tips, man.

What are you nuts? Oh, look at he highlighted the tips. Look, the guy had... If you get me a George Michael, I'll wear it on air one day. 100%. We wear it at an event. What event? Tell me what event.

Oh, no, Skang Fest. Be you anywhere. Yeah, I'll wear it at Skag Fest. I'll wear it on the Bonfire Skang Fest next year. 100%. If George Michael wasn't gay, he would have died many, many years earlier from, like, drowning and snatch. It would have been like

I mean... I had no idea he was gay and I was jealous of him and I want your sex video because all the models were hitting all over him

and I'm thinking man he was crushing all that pussy I think you were jealous so those girls were touching your man that's so sorry I remember Cindy Crawford

is so hot in that Yeah it makes you want to talk like that So did so sauce to say so silly sauce How did we know he was gay? How did that just slip by us? How did we not know, you mean?

Yeah, how do we not know he's gay? I like that it took us finding out he was chugging cock. By the way, if they found out a guy was sucking his dick in a bathroom, you'd still be like, that's not gay, that's George Michael. Everybody wants to suck his cock. He didn't know what's on the side of that wall. He was in a band called Wham, which I think is a gay term. It's like one of those, hey, want a wham?

Well, I mean, Queen. Queen was pretty on the nose. Queen was 100% on the nose. That's a great old David Spade joke about that. He was like, Wham? No idea. He was like, Queen. That was like, cool name. Because they tried to tell us.

That's what he goes, but if you look back and listen to lyrics, you could hear it was all there. He goes, jitterbug. You do the jitterbug. You put your ball bag into my mouth. Yeah, yeah. Jeterbug. That's one of my favorites. George Michael, all this stuff is about guys, too.

you can tell. He says boy a lot. Oh, yeah. I'll be your father figure. I'll just own you for being gay just like him. How to serve your sass or sizzle? I was some so silly sauce. Freedom. That's all I want. Something special.

Something sacred. Silly sauce. Call me a sissy. Sassy silly sauce. What? Now the guy, do we ever see the guy that he did get taken down from? Was it just a regular fucking, Old Queen?

Just a hole in a bathroom wall, man. You know what I mean? That must suck to get taken out by a guy that looks like DJ Lou. Oh, that would suck. No offense. I'm just saying, if you're not taking. If you're George Michael, you know, just a guy in a scally cap and a flannel. Hey, Lou, if I could pick a guy to suck my dick, I'd consider you, dude.

Don't let Bobby bring you down. Right. Don't have hurt you. I could get George Michael in a bathroom. God damn right, you couldn't. You could trust me. You know why? Because I'm the science.

I'm not saying I would 100% be honored to have you suck my dick in the bathroom if it was you. If that's how Don found out, I would be fine with you. I'm saying, George, Michael would not be good.

Yeah. He's right. I'd be honored if you'd suck my penis, Lou. Look at me. Look at me in the eyes. No. Look at me in the eyes. Come on now.

If you suck his penis, I would be honored if I could just put my penis like boobs in your ass crack and just push it up and down your ass crack. It would be me and Bobby's honor to Eiffel Tower you,

but with just you sucking my penis and Bobby hot dog in your butt with his wiener but it won't go in your butt because you're not gay I'm hot dog in it dude I'm not gay you're not gay you're the magic

I swear to God I won't come on the back I will shoot it off to the side like Monte Graffloat I will throw it like beads yeah and I won't come in your mouth it's gonna be really difficult to not come on the top of that shiny head dude you know I want to fucking paint

that fucking canvas but I'm an artist I'm taking mine back too I'm not gonna be able to handle that juicy butt no dude no there's no way dude You're going to have to lay a puddle on the back.

Is that the guy he got caught for, Christine? Well, it says... Marcelo Hernandez? He said that he got caught by an undercover cop, but then when I clicked on it, it took me to... The guy finished out. A guy that says actor? That's the South Park. He goes, wow, daddy, that was allowed to come.

Freeze! Ten million dollar claim by officer who arrested him. Why? Because he did finish. He did finish. He goes, you're under arrest. He goes, oh, that's right, mate. Keep talking.

You're under arrest. under a real arrest. I'm an undercover officer. It's doing it. It's doing it. Stop coming. You're under arrest. Oh, oh, I am. They put the cuffs on. Now you have that. We're both dead.

Get my semen off your uniform, you crazy bloke. Marcella Rodriguez of Los Angeles police was the plainclothes officer who arrested him for lewd behavior in a public toilet and Will Rogers Memorial Park of all places. Now with Beverly Hills.

Can I ask a question? Is that a promotion or a demotion when you have to be the guy in the bathroom trying to suck other guys' dicks? I guess it depends. It's so funny. Just be watching shows on your iPhone while you're waiting for cocks to come through a hole. Busted. He goes, hey, who's over there?

He goes, I'm watching a couple episodes of Sopranos while I'm waiting for a daddy to come put his dick in the hole. I'll put my dick in the hole. Go ahead, bear, bear. Go ahead. Freeze! That's crazy. You think he grabbed it?

Do you think he grabbed his cock through the hole and held him until he put the cops on? Oh, yeah, he goes, why don't you hold me dick and we'll talk about how much I'll pay you? He goes, fuck. Why don't we just talk about it now? He goes, no, I'd rather you hold me dick while we talk about it. Fuck, the things I do for this job. Hey, you have parking lot duty. Martinez, dick-sucking duty.

I bet so few cops want to go undercover in gay situations that me and Bobby can get that job tomorrow. We'll be your gay undercovers. This guy was the real life thought. Send me and Bobby and the fucking wherever you think they're selling meth in the gay parties. We'll ask around. He's the real life Al Pacino and cruising.

Dude, how about me and Bobby just meet up in the bathroom once in a ball with our shirts off covered in glitter wearing angel wings? We go, you hear anything? He goes, yeah, I heard a couple people talking about it over there but I don't know. Having a hard time making Enroads with anybody. He said, yeah, me too, man.

You think they know we're cops? Yeah, dude. We got to smile more, bro. We got to smile. Do you think we know we're fucking UCs, dude? Stop looking sexy. look coy. That's what it is, dude.

I'm out there putting on too much of a show. I'm peacock, and I can't help myself. I get this glitter on me. I don't know. I want to perform. Take the, get the pink gloves out. I need the big guns. My name is Ron the Thunderfuck.

You two are finally having fun at a club. Finally, dude. It's just me and Jay just want to sucking each other off. Fuck, dude, we just come home. Dude, Bobby starts trying. Bobby has to try the drug so they don't, they know he's not a, they don't think he's a narque. Bobby does Molly for the first.

first time and we're out there licking each other's armpits. No, he actually... Snort the rag like Pacino did it? He goes, you're going to try my cum before I do this. I got a sip cum out of his hand. I don't sell to anybody who doesn't try my cum first. Fuck. How much of it?

Just look a drop. But like right from the spigot. I just have a little... Spigold. I put a little blue stuff on it if this turns pink. I know you got AIDS You want to snort a prep Before you suck my dick

Yeah, I guess so Yeah, I guess so Let's be gay cop finders What do they call them? What would be the name for that? Undercover gays Hang on Michael had suggested

During one of the interviews He said Michael suggested The policeman waved his generals around During the course of the arrest I believe it I believe he was trying to get an arrest Hang on, we're out If they're like, hey, you wave that around

we'd be like, could I flick it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, wave it? He goes, yeah. Reach in, pull it out. He goes, I can just probably lower my zipper and underwear and it'll kind of like poke out probably. We wouldn't be able to wave it.

Yeah. I can like move my body back and forth and like it'll like it'll bounce around a little bit. You'll be like, all right, now put yours through the hole. It's in the hole. Yeah, what? I am, dude. My fucking dick hairs through the hole. I'm pushing so hard.

This stall's made out of T. 11. I really can't. Yeah, dude, sorry. This is airport grade. This is airport bathroom grade middle. This is lounge grade, dude. This is thick oak. How uncomfortable is putting your dick through a hole, be. Yeah. That takes a lot of our glory hold. It would have to be like quarter inch sanded plywood. I would never do that. I'm afraid, like, what if somebody's a crazy person, they chop your wiener off? Oh, don't be afraid of that. What if they're not a crazy person? They just start sucking your dick in a bathroom. That's also weird.

Yeah, what if you have a... Yeah, what's like, I wouldn't do that? What if the person on the other side has a knife and cut your dick off? What if they suck your dick in that bathroom you're in? That's all so shitty. I'm saying if I wanted to, I would still that fear of having my dick cut off. You got to trust in the universe, well. I have no trust in the universe.

You should trust in the universe. I will not. Put your dick in any hole you find in a bathroom stall. You have to fucking, you have to let go, let God. Yeah, that's right. I don't know if you know, Vinnie Guagaginio has a tattoo on his chest. Let go let God. You should put a glory hole in your bathroom and then do it to yourself.

There you go. What is that? Now, I'll say something. If I was going to put my dick through a hole, now that's the kind of hole we're talking about. I need something for my dick and balls because I don't like the idea of just my dick hitting the side of hole too much. You know why this is good too? The hole's big enough that would push our little bush fat back. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, it does push it back a little bit if it's high enough.

Now, is this the guy, is this George Michael? Is that George Michael's dick on the other side of that wall right there? It's a recreation. Is this a recreation of a thing? Is that the police officer? So these bathrooms, first of all, isn't this... He didn't even take his phone out of the shot. That's how gay he is.

He's just doing this. They just filmed him doing whatever he does in a bathroom. Isn't this entrapment if you just have a hole in the bathroom? That's like setting them up, right? Yeah, there's a hole in the bathroom. What do you would not put my day to? That's entrapment. Oh.

We know, I do hope... If we put this out, anybody sees it, I do hope that The amount of money, I hope the amount of money this guy's making for this scene lets him get that tattoo finished. I never conceived of this. He's doing this. I love it that this is a set because you see the walls move from the guy in the back. It's a borehole set for him. By the way, this kid takes it in the ass great.

Describe what we're seeing for the radio listeners. You do it, Jay. You do it. Tell them the science. There's a twink guy that's got a tattoo on his chest that says, focus on me and an unfinished dragon going up his body. he is as we speak jerking himself off while bent over he's got one guy coming through a hole in a bathroom that was in his butt i think he's done now he's switching he's going to put the other guy's dick in his butt wow he really just gets it right in there easy well that's that's going to fall apart the set's going to even it out so he has to jump back over and suck the other guy's dick through the other side of the hole which it's coming and it's coming right about oh underneath

Oh, what an awful shot. Pristine Q-Cube. Really? I would say it's the best shot if I was gay. That's the call the money shot right there. Can you get to where everybody blasts come on each other? Jacob, hang on a second. We're going to get to where.

Jacob, I'm not going to skip the blast and come. This is the part that I don't like because guys don't want. This is where guys don't like the cum. They just take it on the cheek like it's gross. He likes. He loves it. Look at him. I mean, nobody wants come in their eye, Bobby.

Mom, you have. Nobody. then you don't like come there's some pornography where girls literally hold their eyeballs open so you can come in them which is a weird thing yeah they probably love it this is where gay porn cuts it off for me because they just freeze

well also can you get the guy closer to coming by helping him before you make them just have a full jackoff session in front of your faith it ended and they didn't come it ended before the come shot boo boo I don't know can we just come back and do the show tomorrow that's fucking I don't like that feeling at all dude I gotta finish myself off now

Great, now I've got to hit the bathroom and finish myself off. Jacob Vamp. Use your knife. We cut a hole in the wall. Uh-huh. Oh, I should, dude. I should paste the halls with this knife out. Have you ever seen, I've never seen a glory hole like in life. You never been to the cock. What is it?

What is it? Oh, were there glory holes in the, were there? Mm-hmm. The cock was, did the old cock on second and second. Now it moved up to where Lit Lounge was on Fifth and Second. Did they redo, do they have updated glory holes? probably I haven't been in there since AI

The cock AI glory holes Now with AI probably Things AI has no No improvement in 3D printers Is you get the better gay bar He goes

Yeah well AI Yeah they have 3D printers Now They just make glory holes Like that now They don't have to Saur it out Sand it down

No Fucking repaint the wall So you could like get a splinter In your penis If it's done Yeah you can do it wrong Yeah you want a carpenter To know what he's doing

Yeah you don't want to see splinters No The cock only follows one person. Who is it? Me? Oh, it's the cock barn. They follow... Cochick the cock.

Oh, the co-check at the cock. Is this a gay bar somewhere? Yeah, it used to be right across street from where me and Christine lived for a while. Really? No, it's there now. It used to be down the street on second street. No, I'm saying it used to be where we lived.

It's still there. There has to be a website where it says where there's glory holes in the city. I bet there's like a map with little hole icon. Yes, you just forward that to Bobby No, he's going to do a walking tour I can just forward it to Christine if you want Like a ghost tour

Let's take a walking tour of Cough We should do that Talk about a bonfire event Everybody meet up here at Sirius one day And we'll take 20 fans on a walking tour Of Glory Holes throughout the city Oh, that's right everybody Follow us

It's the science and the fluence Take it to the streets Christine I'm looking at the cock. We don't need a glory hole. And if there isn't a map of that, Bobby, trademark that app right now. You make the app that finds glory holes around the city with willing mouths behind them. What do we call it?

What do we call the app? To sneak it by Apple. Cockwalk. Cock of the walk. Cock of the walk. Cock of the walk. Damn. Why don't I think of that so fast? Because you're science.

I'm the science. I'm not gay. That's what you think. I'm the science. I mean, you're a little gay. Well, the science is still out. the science is still out of that she found one didn't you you found one didn't you

well I found a Reddit thread there you go there you go just a de-end the details that's what everybody says yeah it's all dear but it also says in sex shops a glory hole is only as good as what comes through it that's a man that's why that should have been a fortune cookie

yeah that's like Marcus Aurelius visit my private apartment glory hole Oh, that would be great to have a glory hole in your own house? How do you not, how do you see a, go to a bathroom, there's a glory hole and not put your dick through it? No, not look through it. How do you not?

Oh, you got to look through it for sure. Yeah, and you have to laugh. If a dick slams into your cheek, you have to chuckle a little bit. By the way, look at this. Someone whose name's Food Timely, they just write, I'm going tomorrow. Any place I can go for a quick suck? It's just like, I love, like, the candidness of it. I'm just going to get a quick suck before work.

Oh, there you go. Right there. So this is near HKin' near Hell's Kitchen. Okay. DM your cockpick and stats to set up a milking session. Oh, look at this. He's getting milked on the other side. Look at it go.

It does look like cattle. Oh, what's this? This guy is a... Cruise the bathroom on campus and found a basketball joke with a massive cock. Can I say this? I don't like this technique. No, this is not glory hole. This is blowing a guy under a stall.

Yeah, you have to be stretched out. You have to have your knees, you know, really stretched to get down that low. This is a guy wearing black face behind a homemade sheet glory hole. These might just be Jews. Now there's a glory hole right there. They put duct tape around the hole so there's no splinters. No splinters.

You've got to hope that tape is covered because the tape starts fucking nicking your dick hairs a little bit. What do you do if a dick comes through that you're not really interested in? Can you tap twice? Is there a dick codes? Like tap twice. I'm not into it. You got to take your dick back? You tell me.

I'm just saying, I don't know, maybe you tap twice. What do you do? I just say put on your fucking Spider-Man mask and suck his cock like this guy. You can wear a mask.

This guy. I do like... Jacob, keep that in mind. You can wear a mask. Yeah. How do you know if that's a woman or not? They're wearing a mask. I don't know if that was real.

What, is their beard the towel? Okay. Wake up, dude. It's 2026. Oh, boy. This guy's wearing a fucking hat over his eyes. Why does he not want to see it? Wait a second.

Something's wrong here. That's not that guy's cock. He's sucking the guys. Yeah, that feels weird. Oh, he's looking at like ice cream. That's an illusion. No, I think it's a fade. Like, they're doing both shots.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a magic trick. Yeah, the splits right here. How great would that be if a magician did this as a trick? Just come on. It's a glory hole. Watch my penis disappear on the other side.

And when it comes back, it will be lighter. Is that cum or spit? What is that? I don't know. You tell us. I mean, it looks like come, but you don't see it happen. Lou, what do you think? You're closer to it. Magic, what do you think over there?

Oh, he's coming on the guy's balls. Magic, what do you think about this guy's fat load on this guy's mouth? Why is he wearing blackface for all of his blowjubs? Wait a minute. He's holding his little tongue out. No, he's wearing black face. No, he's wearing a mask, dude. Lou, is this okay? I'm talking to you over there. Beef. This can't be cool.

It's a black mask. It's a mask, dude. you be the first person Lou no one's arguing about black face and the gay community behind gory holes make this your charge watching blow jobs is enough to make you like you're like how the fuck could I ever possibly do that

I think you solved it yeah you solved your problem four years ago yeah you solved it don't ever do it ever again if I did do something that long too I'd probably go How did I ever do that? That's awful.

You're supposed to do. Psychoject for an hour? Never. I'm pretty sure you and Don came up with the solution. I think I found the website. I pulled my hand back. You found a website? I think I found the website Bobby's looking for.

Well, not me for the show. Oh, for the show. The influencer is trying to add to the story of the show. It's called holehunter.com. Fuck. That's a good one. It's a good name. There's some good ones near us.

Are there? Really? They're bumping as we speak. It'd be funny if there's one in this serious on a certain floor. Is there a way, is there a way legally we can set up like, I don't know, like a Kensington camera inside the glory holes around the city? Yeah, well, you could actually put glasses on Jacob might display glasses. Jacob, would you mind kneeling down behind a glory hole for a couple hours with his fucking medic glasses on? Please.

You're the smallest, she'll be the most comfortable in there. And here's a thing. You can bring your bands in there and do a little workout if you get bored. You could do a workout with you. Yeah, you can do a band workout while you're waiting for guys put their cocks through the hole. Yeah, and when they put the cock to do... We want you to film it.

We just want you to film the cock coming through. Cock coming through the hole. And when it comes through all you have to do is this. And then they pull it back. If you're not twice, Bobby says, from being immersed in the community that he says that makes them pull it away. Ready? Watch this. One, yes.

No. Hell yeah. I know that is confusing that in between it goes negative and the other gets. I'll tell you what you could all. So what's even hellier, yeah, is no knocks at all. Just start chugging his cock the second of it comes here. Don't even look at it first. Have your mouth on the other side of the hole.

So when it comes to the hole, it's immediately in your mouth. Yeah, the guy in the other, when he hears this, it's a lot like pills, dude. Don't look at him. You just got to throw them back and fucking swallow him down. Buddy, all we have to do is this. Go in with the meta-glasses, hang out for a little while. You get three to 17 cocks on video, and then you come back.

Call it a night. Call it a night. This site's hilarious. This Indian DVD place? Oh. Where is this? It's only 1,283 feet away. This site automatically gives you a radius from your location.

Damn it. I would have made millions. Wait, hang on a second. 599 feet. Wait a second. There's a glory hole in the Marriott Times Square. That's what it says. It says you need to be careful because there's no door

and it requires more attention paid to others when they're entering. We have to check that one out. That's here. That's here, dude. Who's going on? Seventh floor. It's too late today, but tomorrow someone's got to go check up the marquee glory hole. Who's going to be?

Is it going to be magic, the fam, or? Well, beef does our man on the street stuff. Well, beef is the guy to go. That'd be funny if he came back with the video, it was just him getting his dicks out. And he just goes, guys, it's just chicks on the other side of the thing. It's nuts. Look at this. Sheridan Times Square's and makeshift glory hole by opening the toilet paper dispenser in the men's restroom near the conference rooms.

That's fucking awesome. They have CIA glory holes? That's awesome. Moynihan train hall. Cruzy men's restrooms on the second floor. Oh my God. No, that's what we don't want to. Restroom is open door with a set of urinals and a long row of stalls.

Good for discrete understall. Understall. No, that's Jabot Center. No, that's understall. This is all understall. We want glory hole. I want a hole that I can shove my cock into and have a man suck it on the other side. I don't know how more clear I need to be about this.

You're being as crystal clear as possible. Am I not laying it out clear? I want a hole that I can comfortably put my penis through. Well, a man will suck it on the other side. We have to send somebody to Sheridan with the secret glory hole that you have to move the toilet paper dispenser. That one, and I definitely want over the Marriott Times Square. That's crazy. Yeah.

Who's going? Jacob. It'll be Jacob tomorrow. Bloomingdale. Bloomingdale, upper restrooms. be discreet. Action at the lower level men's restroom urinals. Action.

Pear Cafe. Cruzy men's locker rooms, steam and showers. Oh, that's Lewis's fucking thing. Everywhere he likes to go. Everywhere that Lewis likes to go. Equinoxes, showers, steam rooms. Actually, he took a shower at the Comedy Cellar Studio and there was a glory hole in the shower next week.

That fucking explains it. What's your, what's your cafe? What are you talking about? This cafe, this pier cafe, that's where I used to walk down on the water where we used to live. And they have the pier and the little cafe there. That's that. Is there a glory hall? There's a small restroom where you get a voyeurism and exhibition with the urinals.

That's why Christine went to go pee for strangers. Be mindful of pastor by family. That's you, Jacob. Fam? And staff. Yeah, it seemed like a very family-oriented place. The fam, dude. That's the fam.

But this isn't for, it's just to look at penises at the urinals. Is that a thing? Is that a thing where you look at it? Is that like you go look at cars before you buy them? And then you go meet them at the Marriott? Yeah, we should go look at some ding-dongs over. How would you, I don't understand how you'd be like in a row of people peeing and like not look at other penises. Like your eyes not like darting left and right constantly.

It's hard. It's hard. I don't look. I don't know. Because you don't want to be caught looking, but like, don't you want to look? Not really. No. If everybody...

Why guess I do like cock? Using like your cock. You're talking about a curiosity factor. Now, if it was just the open thing, it's like, everybody in a bathroom usually just go... Since I was a kid, it was like, everybody goes, pulls their cocks out, takes a peek at each other's cocks, and we all piss.

I'd go, I'm fine with that too, but that's not the case. So I know, I just eyes down it, always. I just wish they would put, like, you know, they put the little thing in the urinal that you hit to, you know, a little game you play. I wish they put like some type of eyes in front of you that you could focus on the eyes. Comedy clubs do that.

They'll put like, sometimes it'll often be like a poster of Ari Shafir coming next month or something like that. I don't want that. Now I'm just thinking about his dick and balls because I've seen that too much. Crunch near Union Square? Oh, no. Well, they had to close the steam room at the crunch because guys are just going on there sucking each other off. They closed it. When I lived on 43rd between 10th and 11th, that gym I had with the basketball, they had the steam room in there and they shut that down because

people in the building were just going down there and sucking each other off. Do you want to just go to their apartments? Yeah? No, it's fun. You can't go to your apartment. Your wife is in there. Look at the New York Sports Club Chelsea.

In Chelsea? Oh my God. Action in the men's locker room, sauna and showers. Yeah, no doubt, not stop. I went to that gym. I know, until you had to get your holes stitched up. Why would you go to a gym in Chelsea? You know why? Because he likes to get his ass wailed on through holes.

Why would you go there? Remember he had those neck problems? You don't hear about those anymore, do you? Nope. Very active cruise. Oh, the Rambles. That's what George Takede would always say on Stern, right? The Bramble.

He would call it the Brambutes. Oh, so it is a gay cruising spot. What is the rambles? It's what he said he would go there for gay cruising. A section of Central Park. It's not the brambles? I always thought it was Brambles. Well, he would say the Brambi.

Who knows? So what do you go to the park and you just fucking jump in a bush with somebody? Yeah, walk around. There's guys with their cocks. out, I guess. But there's family is everywhere. Well, not the Rambles.

Not the Brambles where the people suck and fuck. Do they have a stanchion? Like I go to a gay cruising section of Central Park and it's like the Rambles. 36 acres of butt fuck, dude. Heavily wooded area near 70 seconds street. There's just so much cum on the ground.

There's no birds. There's no bugs. Yeah. No one knows why the tree trunks are all dying. He goes, I don't think this is possible, but all these trees have HIV. So much sucking. Its site's great.

All these trees. You should go cruising. All these maple trees turned into birch trees. How did that happen? Christine, go see how many times. Go stand behind a bunch of these. We'll film it. And then when Cox come through the thing, say, go, I guess go,

I'm a girl. And they see it to go, they just pull it back out. Oh, I'm a girl. Oh, here you go, Jacob, Astoria. There you go, dude. Is that near you, Jacob? It's a 20-minute walk, but I could get there.

You can get there, okay? Cruzy men's restroom between the track and tennis courts. Too busy for action in the afternoons. Instead, crews early mornings or evenings. The park is officially opened from 6 a.m. to 10 p.m. A door off the restroom might lead to showers, but they've been locked during COVID. Oh, God.

Oh, Jacob, how about this? You can skip the whole bullshit. In Harlem, there's a good-looking 22-year-old college cock-sucker hosting a private glory hole in his apartment. He's orally gifted and open to a lot, so you just go to his house and stick your cock through his hole. Yeah, just contact him. I'd kick. Or Planet Fitness in North Bergen, perhaps. That's so funny.

This park is right next door to the Costco I go to, but we knew there were just a few feet away. There was so much cock-sucking going on. But now, Jacob, do you want a glory hole or do you want to crouch down on the floor under the stall? Or do you want to just go watch cock? You have many options. I'm not doing any of that. The Sikakis rest area? That's for you.

That's for you. Beef and Magic. If you guys want to check anything out. Sycoccus. Jersey City's got 24 fitnesses. Macy's in Brooklyn. Oh, nice. In the basement level.

Ooh. What is in the basement level? Is it a glory hole or is it a... Fucking guys with their asses open, I guess. Stand-alone Macy's. Gay guys. I just want to fuck so much to wherever you just go, where they're at. There's just a guy, you can always go,

it's like, well, you guys want to drink, you could dance. They're just guys with their assholes open in the other room. I-95 rest area, the Vince Lombardi Insight State Rest Area. That's what he, that's honoring him. That was his dream. Cruzy men's restroom. Not me, do. I do all my gay sucking and fucking at the John Bon Jovi rest up. Now featuring gasoline.

Shot through the fart. Now featuring gasoline. Oh, man. Action in the men's or locker room. Okay. I want to change. Punched in the fart. What do you want to change?

change the map area specify location yeah yes please yeah yeah type in your address please if wouldn't mind i just lewis's new house don't let me type it's the only spot that's the only spot oh we can't specify location all of a sudden yeah this guy sucks but when we get home i can reload it from our location i mean that's nuts just like regular stores macy's macy's women cruising what is that it's something that doesn't happen ever really damaged, damage people. This is the first time this page has ever been opened. Hey, for women who want to suck random cocks

behind a hole in a bathroom. You just go to the page, this is coming soon, get it? It's like, just be a fucking hooker and make some cash. Where are we doing? If you're a girl who wants to just get fucking your face fucked behind a hole, I agree with Christine on that one. Get money for it if you're going to go fucking suck off anyone who puts a cock through a hole.

If people pay us. Get money. What the fuck is that? Instead of just sucking through Gloria. Why don't guys charge at least a little, you know what I mean? You know how your dicks work? I mean, just put a little hat out or something. No, no, but I get what Bobby's asking is, the cock sucker.

She can make like 10 bucks, 20 bucks. No, they love it. It's for them too. Look it. You guys don't love it. She's not a gay guy. It's not as bad as I made it out when I was looking at the gay guys to it. It can be enjoyable.

Right. They do make it very scientific. Right science? I'm like, ugh. Take it into science. The influence is right. They should pass a hat though in a steam room. That's for the sucker just as much as the sucky.

But these, no, there's definitely gay guys that are psyched to just suck off guys. Without a doubt, I'm saying just a woman, like the rarity, first of all, that is never, ever, ever going to be an attractive woman. Unless that attractive woman is like, is going like mentally. I can send it's like I'm you know like some damage things she's doing but no woman's gonna because you can go you can be selective

about who you want to just suck off any guy you could suck any guy off you could suck off a guy that you do find attractive and stuff like you know what I mean and if I're gonna say it's the kink of not knowing who it is but like there's no attractive girl who wants to suck off a grotesque dick through all the whole

Christine can I ask you a question as a girl as a woman if you were in a bathroom and you and there was a whole in the thing, whatever, and all of a sudden a nice, pretty cock came through it. Would that freak you out, or would you be like, hey, I'll try

this? I mean, just out of nowhere, probably would just be out of a little. With the bathroom. I'm like, oh, my God, I can't resist. I just have to go at it. I was going to say, if it's, like, I think it's almost different, if it's like in a fucking gross, dingy bathroom, if she's at a steakhouse, a nice steakhouse.

What you feel? Like, though. Bloomingdale. She's a bloominings. What about it? Louis Vuitton. It's not going to have. Christine, it's not going to have.

What if a beautiful uncircumcised European cock comes through? I think in your fantasy situation here, Bobby, this could happen to many a girl. Many would just run away, but there's also just these things get done at all because it's worked at some point.

So there's been a cock that's coming through a hole and a girl, listen, those videos, I don't know how many of them are real or not of a guy jerking off in his car and then a girl, but there's some where the girl looks very like a regular old chick who walks by. Right. And she goes, like, I'll help you with that. And then just, like, jack the guy off on his stomach and then, like, leave.

And they kind of laugh about it together. Like, oh, that was something wild I just did. Yeah. Maybe. It's a porn. But I'm just saying. No, no, no, no. It's a guy filming himself jerking off in a fucking thing.

There's plenty of these that are fake. There's plenty also where it looks like a chick. Yeah. On our way to, like, a target, like a mom almost. And she goes, you want some help with that? Like, he's like, he's jerking off in the neighbor. He's looking to get caught. A lot of people catch them and chased them off.

Yeah, it can be. And then one girl, and then one lady goes like, what are you doing over this? She's like horny. And like, I'll help you with that and jack them off. It can't be just guys like sucking dick. And if a tit came through, sucked it. Girls, there has to be girls that if a cock came through a hole in a wall, she'd be like, I'm going to fuck, this is great.

I'm going to suck this dick. But that chick's a problem. They're borderline. They're schizophrenic. The chick who does it like that is a problem. They were raped by their own father. Like, they exist. I don't.

They're out there. I don't think that. I think you. Nice, Christine. You know my father didn't love me enough to rate me, and you can't constantly bring that up. You don't think there's a girl out there that just likes penis that would, if a cock came through the, if a penis came through a wall where you, you'd immediately be offended and scream and run away. How drunk am I? You're drunk. Didn't you see?

You're on ecstasy? How drunk am I? When's the last time I was late? Five years ago, Christine. But there's also the question, though, of like I said before, it's like, if that happens to. Science, the fact that you put your glasses on to have this part of the conversation, I really do appreciate it. after we need this other thing. We've got to read our plugs in a second.

No, I'm saying I think if a girl had that happen, like I think the immediate thing is, again, it's almost like a danger thing. So you probably freak out. But I don't think that doesn't make that girl just go like, oh, now I kind of want to fuck a random guy tonight. What if a penis came through and it had a little, like a ribbon on it? And it said, hey, it had a little face on it.

Oh, yeah. What if it's, what if it's, here's the move. What if you put your wiener through the thing and it says, pull me? And then when they pull it, you fart. then everyone has a laugh yeah and then you suck it and then suck my dick whoever you are

all right I did what I do I made you laugh now suck me off ah shit now suck me off you went to that place the cock and you so you went in the glory whole bathroom

no my friend didn't go in the bathrooms there were only men's bathrooms my friend told me they were like it was the dirtiest part I've ever been to my gay friends wanted to go there so bad there were guys like dancing and little tidy whitties head, you know, you just like, they were putting in cash with, like, teeth.

It was real grinding. Someone has to go to the Sheridan and go to this secret spy glory hole. I'll tell you this though. And videotape it for us. I will say, though, when the dance floor is covered in jizz, you could always moonwalk. You can moonwalk across the floor at any fucking gay bar for sure, dude.

Don't forget you can break dance, really. You don't need cardboard or anything. Oh, my God, dude. I did a fucking 15-minute head spin on one twist. That's how slick the floors are. Oh. What are you over here, filming beef? Oh, my lord. Bobby Kelly, that's right, the fluence.

He's going to be at the verve in Somerville, New Jersey, March 19th, and Comics Roadhouse in Connecticut, April 17th, and 18th. After that, he's going to be at Uncle Vinnie's in New Jersey, Cleveland, Ohio, New Orleans, for tickets in all tour dates. Go to punchup.com. Make sure you check out his YouTube channel, Robert Kelly, Comedy. And every Tuesday night, you can catch him live in the flesh. 7 p.m.

The Fat Black Pussy Cat Lounge. the comedy seller. And the science is going to be the comedy zone in Jacksonville, March 13th through the 14th. After that, comedy on state slamming down some facts and science. Let me down some science. The 19th through the 21st. And that after that, he's going to be in Phoenix, Tempe, St. Louis,

for tickets and all the tour days. Go to bigj.comedy.com. YouTube.com slash at BigJ.okerson. and science. We'll see you tomorrow. That's right, Fluence. On behalf of beef, magic, family, and the cackle. We'll catch you guys tomorrow, right here on the bonfire.