The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Different Strokes

Episode Date: December 13, 2023

The Bonfire producers fall apart as live reads get confusing and Jay revisits 80's sitcoms.

And now the bonfire with Big J.O.K.R.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.M. We have a show to do. We're following a part as a unit. A bonfire, not me and you. Me and you. We're going to do a bonfire. We're going to do a bonfire. We're going to do a bonfire.

We're going to do a bonfire. We're going to do a bonfire. We're going to do a bonfire. We're going to do a bonfire. We're going to do a bonfire. We're going to do a bonfire. We're going to do a bonfire. We're falling apart as a unit. I'm on fire, not me and you. Me and you couldn't be more on the same page. Solid is a rock. But as a unit, we're doing bad.

It's a tough time. Is it year maybe? I don't know what the tough time is. Jacob, why do you look? The ad reads reads have become quite your deal when they usually just be numbered well they used to use to have a thing where it said one two three four yeah and I'm going all right but now it's a different thing I just get we I think we just have to learn the

different and you can always reference the you can always reference the you'd reference the time right that it says to us You know five it'll be a 530 something 530 something here's the problem sure. Yeah, I don't know how to do a big version The old man I version of the reads you need I can print this out and put one two three four five. Yeah, but then you won't be able to read them Lewis knows how to make it now you could put a number on top of any page Do you do you not see a number on top of the reads today? It's just a little all over the place and so it's that the the dates the times are wrong on them Which is they don't need the the dates or the times just confusing them man

Let's just get it together as a group. I'm not sure why we're all working against each other I tell you I have a feeling I know it is Jacob Whatever it is figure I had to put numbers on top of those papers. I know you can do it my man Is that being confident? I know you can do it. I'm a failure Jacob you got this no guys listen. I don't want to hear that out of the group I wouldn't understand something you're all failing All of you. I don't want you to think it's just all on you Lou as a group of failing and I think I have a theory on What's going on? Yes? I'd love to hear this there. Dan Soder came in on Monday, and you guys have been

fucked in the heads since you walked out the door. Is everything okay? He got D disease. I mean, Jesus. Yeah. Look at Jacob's all sad. What you guys got to dinner after and he poisoned you against us. What happened, Jacob? Are you trying to sabotage the show? You want me out? Is that what you want you want Dan back? Wait wait, but Bobby what? The insubordination of a friend. I can't make the old man letters and put numbers on top. Of course you can you child I mean yes, I can't My social media steaks it's respectfully. He did respectfully which I do it appreciate it

I mean I am not apparently doing anything right on social media and now old man let go Fuck you a gray beard. What's happening? How's that Jacob? What's having sorry Bobby? I can't make big letters and put numbers on I don't know how to I'm sorry that my eyes went you can just take a marker and write it on the paper Yeah, you can put one I'm saying I don't know how to take PDF and blow it into this no problem and then but whatever it is Numbers on top and I know we can do it because if the show does good we all do good guys. Yeah, dude. You're acting like there are numbers on this Are there are there where where is your numbers? Where's there a number? Here you see this number one at the top. Okay, that's one. Okay, go no one

Okay, three and one says second hour that's have us a 5 30 time on it. What does that say? 5 30 5 30 what does it say? Number five second hour. No, what does the number time say? No, listen, I you guys can all give me the papers. I'll show you what I'm talking about. That was wrong, right? Yeah, it's wrong Yeah, it's wrong. It's Yep, it's confusing so I'm saying this guy is a spaz of talk guys. Yeah, we're and this is facetious and a little bit cut to your purpose But let's fix it all man. Just go by the number on top. And you got it. Here's the thing.

No one I say this no more Dan. No one. I'm going to earn Dan again. You have to earn Dan. You know, I heard he was here today with his fiance. Yeah, didn't see him. Yeah, he didn't pop in to see you. I didn't come in and say hello.

Interesting. Well, guess who didn't come in and say hello interesting Well, guess who guess who came in and said hello to you. Yeah us Robert Kelly Are you mad at me the shittiest man on the Instagram? I don't know because you called me an old Instagram hagg Now that was a shot Jacob shot fired I like your Instagram shots fired dude. You call me old man eyes What I have Well the back up the back pedal is worthless now I know I don't know how to make it big for your old man eyes

I don't and put numbers on the top. Yeah, what a crazy thing to say out loud We've all talked about your shitty eyesight We don't it was when Dan could read small print like a normal human being. We don't know how to adjust the print to your shit eyes. Well, he's just made Dan struggle. Dan had to get laser eyes so he can see the reads. They never even consider it. So they do blow it up for you, but they do it reluctantly with anger in their hearts. I just listen, I just want to read it. And you know what? And it's pretty dark in here. You understand? It's saying? This crew never liked working for me. They loved working for Dan.

And now they don't like working for you either. So now we're in a room where we have a crew of people who don't enjoy working for it. I think this is insane talk. No, no, no, no. It's dead on. Put it out to the fan verse. That's your, don't do that.

I think your girlfriend put that in your head. Christine's on your team. Christine, they don't like Christine either, especially the way she's done. I think your girlfriend put that in your head Christine's on your team Christine, they don't like Christine either especially the way she's turned on Christine hard yesterday. She stinks. They did turn on Christine hard Yes, I didn't turn on her I mean Go ahead. I'm mighty Do you want to smoke today's perfume? Oh It's not bad not bad at all you guys are referencing everything everything that happens tomorrow, by the way. Oh, yes tomorrow I should say this too because it might be a little

Tramon stop because you guys I needed a lot a lot of edits. Did you bleep? I did bleep I got to go back and check because I'm on my sneak through you guys know every time you hear bleep It's me calling Jacob and Lou the f word I feel bad about that yesterday though. No, no, no. That's for one sec. I lost one bit of sleep over it. Thank you for the claps by the way.

There was a clap before they said it. We gave it break marks at least. I know you have a job to do and you are on the team. That helped. Well. I'm guys. I'm sorry Dan left you. I got single mom situation going on here. Dan left you and now I'm got single mom the situation going on here. Yeah, Dan left you and now I'm eating his shit

Yeah, I'm sorry that the new dad that loves your mom loves your mom loves your mom loves your mom Love your mom. Do you know good, and you know what your stepfather Bobby treats me and I love I love her kids So much just like if I my own kids. I love you guys Just like my own kids. I love you guys Just like his own Just like my own kid. I love you Jay and I love you You and I love you Lou and I love you Jacob. Look at me Jacob. I love you kid. I love you Okay, then stop fucking us up the ass every day Or if you love me at least kiss me on the neck first.

Alright, I'm giving you these reads. Yeah, but without attitude, tone, or your thrill to have correct the mistake that was not made by us. Okay, let's see. Oh, yeah. And just go by the numbers on the top and the ones. One, two, three, four, five, six, and five second hours. And a crowbar, Stephen Singer within the thing. the thing you know what guys let's just fucking nail that right now Yeah, I gotta get Christina present anyway Maybe this should be something from Stephen singer everybody cuz it's time to get real real natural earthborn diamond stud earrings From a real jeweler, Steven Singer Jewelers. Steven has the most beautiful best value real diamond studs anywhere

and right now you could choose a great pair of Anita Diamond stud earrings at the perfect price. A full one-carat pair is only $1,988. Body mail also suggest this wasn't the first to add up in my list. This was listed as four, but we have to get it in the first hour of the show. We're going to get the hang of it. We're going to give so good as a group here. I know we are. We're going to be so good. Uh, one on the top, right?

No, the very top of the page. No, no, no, it's a four if I'm going to do Steven Singer first. Well, but whoever had the one should read the one you guys. I have a one should Fuck you now Because Turn off the music for a second Lou Sort this shit out at a better time dumb shits. I don't know. I said go in order one two three Three six and then Jay started

Talk to your stepfather like that. I might not be your real dad, but I love your mother. So you do that, go. You have permission to punish. That's very much. That's very much. Oh, what's that, everyone? Steven's real diamond studs are 100% eye flawless. Steven's singer, George, that's iH StevenSinger.com.

Because the music, the point of that, you say I'm reading number four first, but Lou said we have to get Steven Singer in the first hour. So it should have been the thing on top, but you guys got to communicate not just through a made up system of hand gestures. I gave it to you. I said read and order. Yeah, but they couldn't read nor because it's when I had to get crowbar in the body of you. The one. Oh, Bobby's one is Steven Singer. No. Yes, it is. Yes, it is. Thank you. It is. So you could have just gone one, two, three, four, five, six, like I said, I know all of this would have been fun and fairness. Don't look at me. Jay took it over and I backed Jay. Well, Luke told me to look told me to crowbar in the Steven Singer. The first.

Yeah, and Luke doesn't look me directly. I at the first 10 minutes of the show. We will be here. Bobby, let me have your number one. And let's pretend like you read that. Okay, okay. Sure. See, the problem is, and I keep saying it, there's too many chefs in this kitchen. Let me just be in charge of all of it.

Yeah. Because we didn't have a problem for like a year when I was doing it. Who do you want to let go? Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob,

Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob or Buckelo, who's fired yesterday you would have missed a read. Last yesterday you went, oh, no, no, you can. There is a reason. So that mean you're going to fire a black. He's not even here today. Just from this job. Though you could, you could still be captain break hands. Have you fun with your little hands?

Black loser, like, black loser said done. Now, black loser is a little fine. He just had done like he's excited. Now, he knows we need him. More and he needs us. We need a black guy floating around here who laughs at jokes. Just to know they're funny. He's a funny barometer.

If you all want Captain Witsky to, to steer the ship, that's fun. No, I want Lou to fire you. No, I want 10 seconds now. You want 10 seconds? Wait, what are we doing 10 seconds on? But Lou, so you're going to print it out, do it. I don't know why you want to do it. Christine, you can't do it.

Yeah, this isn't silence. I know how to make the big type. I know how to do it all. All right. So Bobby also, Bobby always does the 10 seconds because his fingers are hilarious. Okay. We're going to do 10 seconds that Lou is going. Everybody agrees that Lou is going to take over.

Take over once. Lou is has something to say. One question. Yes. Mr. Whiskey. Mr. Whiskey? Mr. Whiskey respectfully. Do you feel like our checks and balances system

between the three of us has worked out and us not getting in trouble for missing any reads? Do you feel like it's 100%. No, no, I think that's good. We should watch each other's backs. But as far as writing and printing them out and making the letters big, I should just be in charge of all that's good. We should watch each other's backs, but as far as writing and print writing and printing them out and making the letters big I should just be in charge of all that Okay, here's 10 seconds. Here's 10 seconds. You print will check. Here's 10 seconds ready. Here we go. Okay What? Okay, five seven

It's back up to six now Down to three two It's back up to six now down to three two Okay, I think I think that was ten seconds. I don't know I can't tell Bobby Spiggers all go different directions Wait a second. So that is that is law. That's law So we got some Bobby doing his ten seconds. That's bonfire law right now. It's not bonfire law I've ever since black loose had one question. I've just had Princess Princess Vitara. Do you we asked stuck in my head? Yeah. Oh, do you we at damn little black Jesus? Do you? Do you? Do you? Do you? We all agree? Can we all understand? Dan left

you and he doesn't want to work with you anymore. Yeah, he wants nothing. Do you understand that? He ran out of here as fancy could could he hung in there as long as he can But he didn't want to be with us. He had Equipment ready to go in his house. He's gonna houses a studio. Yeah, his apartment has a studio Yeah, he didn't he did all of that to not have to be with you guys anymore He didn't negotiate a different amount of time. He didn't say there's a amount of money He would do it for he said no money He didn't even want to see us today Jim he would do it for he said no money. He didn't even want to see us today. Jim McClure sat us down. He said, Dan, how much money

to keep you here? Right. He said, there's no number you can name. I need to be away from these guys. And they've simp. They simp on them. And then they get all fucking. They're all chammody and pissy the next day. Jim didn't even talk to people money You just said okay, what do you need? What we should happy and I will do everything I'm like power just to flip it around I do yeah eat ass ass ass I do She removed all the stuff right we're back right we're back Jacob you good You good black. Little you good. We settled some hell yeah, let's do it. You take this weekend everybody Now we're good right now you take this weekend good and you lament Dan whatever you have to do

Burn a trinket he gave you and watch the ashes go into the air Right his name went up balloon and release it into the sky. Whatever fucking queefe ceremony is thing you have to do. Move forward. Jay and Bobby are your guys now and we need a hundred percent out of you guys. Yeah, I want you to burn that this weekend, Black Lucel. Burn it. Burn it.

Burn it. Damn, soda. Cousin, I want it in flames. I want it in flames. Take it down. Don't do it inside, Louis. It's probably some very noxious material. So the coosie I wanted in flames take it down Don't do it inside Louis probably some very noxious material Just burning plastic oh god

I think your knee I Did hurt my knee. Yeah, sorry the old man hurt his knee to Jake want to jump in on this what were you trying to read something? Twisted your knee your fucking dildo I think I heard it on stage last night at the pussycat I I went to do it. I was in the middle of a joke and I turned and I went and it had a jaunty joke something happened And it but it popped back in which I was cool with and then this morning it popped out again, and it hasn't popped back in So I had to go see dr. Gale and he injected my belly. He made me inject it with something. For your knee. I don't know what it is. He injected your belly for your knee. Yeah. He goes, I'm going to give you a test. I'm Tocca Lacharide and it's going to help you.

And I was like, okay, because I don't have to talk. Tocca Lacharide. That's the good stuff. I'm a people, please. I don't know how to say no. Well, you just went to the doctor and said, my near it's in the gave you a shock. I did that. I had to get an MRI to get a stupid injection. Well, I, I, yeah, Dr. Gail, who's a friend of mine, lives right across you from Jay, and I couldn't walk. I was, I was hobbled around the city all day. I couldn't walk. So he went over there and I, he gave me an MRI prescription for tomorrow, but he also gave me Taka Raka Ride. He goes, if you take Taka Raka Ride in your stomach and then he made me do it,

that he made me put the needle in and then inject myself, which was nuts. Yeah. And I put it in. And supposedly that's going to make me feel good. And I don't know what it is. I said you feel weird. I feel a little weird, but I don't know. And my left my nose is running blood. You're doing good man. That's Yeah, yeah, aside from the spiders under your skin you're probably doing all right Spiders do what spiders in here Oh, he gave you more he gave me a bag of Tuckle-Arnger eyes. Oh, yes, look it up. Dude, that's a good stuff. Boot me up right now.

The literal Zip Lock Bag. Yeah, he gave me a Zip Lock Bag. Dude, it's a freezer bag. I'm a doctor. Dude, he's a great doctor. It's like the doctor that hung out with Hunter S. Thompson. Yeah. He's got all kinds of machinery and his apartment.

The whole thing can't be lying above board. It's tro methathin, methathine. Methamine. He's like your methamine. You know the Botox your armpits. Let me give you face left real Who's TROM ETH AMI any tro methamine mean he's like he's like moving shit around in his fridge Yeah, he's like oh, I bet these bagels are freezer burn. Oh, here it is. This gives you this makes you a bigger dick or freezer burn. Oh, here it is. This gives you this makes you get a bigger dick. Yeah. Tremethamine. Maths in there. Okay. Tremethamine. I'm here and more alkaline less acid. It's used to treat metabolic

acidosis. The condition where the body produces too much acid or when the kidneys run removing enough acid from the body. What? What the fuck am I taking? What do you do? What your knee? Yeah. What does that fucking have to do with my knee? It's how about this one? It says something else on the two it says a tutorial a catoral ack What's catoral it's a non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drug most often given by injection illegal in the United States

It is indicated for short term But the FDA is not approved it because of vicious side effects. Most often being severe seizures, loss of sight, and Alzheimer's like slash dementia like results. Yeah, but he could dementia, so I can just take that. You're fine. I'm fine. Just guys giving you a business.

No, it's a short term management of moderate to severe acute pain. Okay. Give you the right thing. I cool I gave myself the right thing without a yeah, you can't legally give it to you because it's legal. God Yes Anyway, you take it off. Oh, now she's leaving. She hates the show. She is I mean She's just mad. She is fed after the conversation that Dan's not coming I haven't had the heart to tell you the dance on the show anymore She thought I was just doing a guest spot is about I know I told you that Bobby was just here for a little bit when Dan was coming back He's not coming back. Yeah, John's gone. Sorry

Oh Fair enough love you Bye Oh Fair enough love you bye Well well well, she's gonna be an esthetician. She's gonna make all of our faces beautiful. That's nice That's right. Don't miss an esthetic. You know long time. Yeah Remember getting a facial from her what? What I winked at Jacob when I said it. What do you mean a facial? Not that. Yeah, yeah No, you know, we went over to the place where she works and got a facial. What stops hand at Don't say it like that. She's nested. Tition of course. Yeah, she got it. She mean her got together and there was a facial like I

Stop, man. I like it. Please stop doing that. I don't know. She didn't I respect your wife. I've never now dude You've always been yes one of the big dogs to me Did I would never come in to disrespect your wife, but she was an institution so we did get involved with a facial way Do stop. I don't like it. What are you doing man? She didn't give you a facial. She Adjusted your zits No, no no facial took place in that, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Ralph from the Howard Stern show very very sad. Yeah Ralph's the relar and who else died today Norman Lear Norman Lear yeah, I have a little more I have a little more. I mean, I don't know Ralph. I know Ralph like that, you know, sad

But Norman Lear that's stay I mean he was the best TV shows of all time now Are they gonna say now that you know people though get mad at at all the family because they don't understand what satire is have they gotten mad at i haven't heard any of that i don't think it's like the general consensus but you could look up visceral hate towards anything like that well there's a period of time like when i was growing up all the family was not like replayed on like nicket night like you couldn't really watch it and then i think it kind of came back but i don't know if that was like censorship stuff or what was going on

It's the funny one. I was when I was young It's probably the funniest show in the most relevant show ever made on TV I mean the first episode was meet head when he meets meet head Is it the very first episode? First episode when he meets meet head and he just fucking starts singing. You ever see that one? Yeah, he tells him what about America's about. It's the great. He's the greatest show ever dude. Well, we meet head Lost all the weight. He lost a bunch of weight. He looks good. I saw him on Bill Marr him and Albert Brooks. Yeah, yeah Rob Reiner. Yeah, he's funny

Very big a very big time movie director. I'm not saying the 40 bills here to tip Christine was nothing about anything oh yeah this is the first episode look at a meathead just a big hippie go to the end 20 go to the end the end of the episode it's so funny man it's the greatest it's the greatest funniest show ever she go back on it it's really funny there's the episode where where you just get someone tries to rape Edith. Well, I mean that's not a fun episode. That's not that fun. I don't there's not a lot of jokes in that one. No, no. He doesn't get away with it.

That's so funny. You go right to that episode when Edith gets raped. Well, no, that was it was a very spell show episode. I love the show shows that had very special episodes. That's different strokes was the... The pedophile. The pedophile. And Sam getting kidnapped in the later years. Right.

Dudley's father having a long or moved. Diddy. Yeah. Really? And it ends with him swearing to Dudley that he's giving it up son. I'm here for you. And then he goes outside the room and he lights up a cigarette and it ends. Oh, yeah, I do remember that. That's weird. I do. It freaked me out.

It's actually, it's pretty crazy. Dudley's dad was, they subtly made him the stupidest person in the world. He came over the episode they got molested. He came over to talk to Mr. Drummond, Dudley's dad, and if you don't know the episode, Arnold, little Arnold from different strokes. If you don't know who that is, then I don't know what to tell you. Arnold and his best friend Dudley, when they were little boys, go to hang out of bicycle, pizza, bicycle shop, and he tries to molest them. He does molest Dudley. The dad comes over to talk to Mr. Drummond Dudley's dad Who's Arnold's adopted father? And he goes they have a little conversation for a few seconds He goes if I could talk to you for a second, Mr. Drummond

I just appreciate it in the future if you wouldn't give my son a bunch of wine Like he was coming over to play at least come not to give him wine He works he came home like as drunk from getting molested But it's just such a funny thing that that was his reaction to come over goes hey do me fear Just don't give my eight-year-old wine anymore if it's cool and like nothing's gonna change I'm not really angry about just like don't like my wife's actually bitching about it I don't know how to find out that he got molested. How was it? Was it just assumed? I think Arnold says eventually like it was it was getting pretty weird over there like did they find out that he got molested? What was it just assumed? I think Arnold says, eventually, it was getting pretty weird over there.

Like, did they say why? No, it's very strange. On the episode, we went on Skanks and took a peek at this recently. Very strange, but that episode, there are canned, I don't think that was in the live studio audience, but what maybe it was, but whatever it was, the laughter, there was like,

laugh track that happened within the scene of him. Like after he'd already shown them like pictures of him and his friends naked. And then there's like a laugh or two after that in the scene and you're like, whoa, what? That's balls. Jesus. Remember the one with dice clay was in

when he was the... Different strokes, different strokes. He was the bully and he had a gun and it was it was Willis Willis took his gun or something like that yeah dice was in it as that was like dice is before he was dice yeah it's funny for us Whitaker was the Gooch in episode the Gooch great name I know that's so funny that that was the bully's was the Gooch in episode. The Gooch. Great name. I know that's so funny that that was the bullies name.

The Gooch. He was always coming for Arnold because he was a rich kid. Yeah, dice was so dice. A. Yeah. Where you got my gun. Oh. Oh. You have it?

You have dice on different strokes? I'm in love with your sister. Oh yeah! Look, just stay away from me, you're disgusting! Kimberly! Marry me! I was going there! Todd Bridges, the who played the older brother on the show, Todd Bridges was on the fastest road

to death of anybody on this show. He outlived everybody. Yeah. Yeah, I lived everybody. He was all the crime. Now he's like a talking head on entertainment shit and whatever, you know, child star talks about that shit probably does speaking engagements or whatever. He's on those world's dumbest criminal shows. Good girl, first, right? She, I think she died before. Everybody. Gary Coleman, yeah. But not the maid.

But she was a mess. She started doing like light pornography, but not even like good stuff. It doesn't even matter. Yeah, I know. Oh, and someone just does, like she did Skin and Max type movie. And it's like, yeah.

I don't know, your tit's not enough to change everything I mean you were Kimberly you weren't like the main character I would that very special episode Look like I'm telling you they send the wrong message to me when they show her in the kitchen Just eating they have a whole table. It's like she's eating cake with her hands and shoving snacks in her mouth and all this kind of crazy shit and And then she's throwing up. She got needing disorder. She was doing, she was bulimic, but I was like, wait, so you can't, if you throw

everything, you eat up right away, like, I was like, what I'm older, when I can make my own decisions, I'm going to do that. But you lose all your teeth from the vomit. I never did it because I did come to find out it's a terrible thing, but that show wasn't It didn't sell hard it seemed like an actual solution But you know what your new teeth actually will survive the vomit. So you could do that I could get into some nice point now. I bet it would fucking take the adhesive off

Like a ton in my life and I didn't affect my teeth my teeth. They're still fine in here. It's a crazy thing You know, I have thrown up a ton I threw up a lot there were a lot of booze A very special episode what was a was there a silver spoons one? They're had the whistle whistle. What was it? Rickie Schroeder? Rickie Schroeder. Rickie Stratton Well, that's on the Dana Carvey show doc. The whole thing is the home improvement. Very special.

Well, that was yeah, the kid. The kid at a cancer scare. Did happy news ever have a very special episode? Oh, I'm certain of it. For sure. Yeah, they had it. What was there very special like some real, but all those those shows back in the day

weren't just straight the comedy They always had some sort of conflict like thing that was like Try to be relatively emotional. Yeah, there was always a problem to be solved on happy days and and the Brady bunch was always a family issue Some type something to learn. Oh, it was a faunzy when blind I don't know if it was, I don't know what he wants blind from, but it was temporary. And then he put his car, his bike back together without any just by feel. You know why? Because he's the farts. Yeah, that's why you're still getting

laid. It says, it says they did it. I don't smoke episode. Yeah, the uncoolness of smoke. Says Fonzie. That's why I liked all the family though, because all the family wasn't cheesy at all. It was just like really gritty life. The way life was, it was like the first sitcom that you watched where like happy days was cheesy, Brady Munch was,

they made racial tension though, but they sold it like actually happening in a neighborhood. Right. But the guy, Carol O'Connor, I started interviewing with him recently, he talked to him as Carol O'Connor. He said, let me, can I talk to you as both people? He's like, how would Carol O'Connor, what does he think about the environment?

And he's like, well, I think it's very important that we take care of the planet and that, you know, he's a mega liberal. Yeah, he's like, I think it's very important that we take care of each other. We all have to do our part. And he goes, well, what archie think? He goes, well, you talk about the trees.

Yeah, he goes, take a tree. I mean, it was so fucking amazing. What a great actor that that character, he's the complete opposite of Archie Bunker. But when he goes into it, he just turns into that piece of shit, awesome Republican. He's a whole lot better. Dude, it's so funny.

When he's in the elevator, I'm gonna kill it a little bit, but he's in the elevator with the Puerto Rican guy and the black dude, and they get stuck. And he's being Archie. And then the Puerto Rican guy comes and goes, Mr. Bunker, I am equal to you. And he goes, equal to me. You're not even equal to him. And he puts the black guy in the black. I just goes, that's right. He was making

a point. It's just the crazy. Not really weird for it. Jefferson spun off of that, right? Jefferson's, well, they were the neighbors. And then they moved on up. Oh, that, when the Jefferson's came over, when his parents came over, that was great. When they would fight you. Oh, God, dude, him and Mr. Jefferson were the best. They premiered George Jefferson on all in the family. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, he was a character for a while though, yeah. I believe. A little bit, yeah, a little bit, yeah. Fuck, just great. You know, I told you we were having that conversation about where shows good or where they just on. I'll tell you two that were just on that I definitely watched.

227. What the fuck was that? You don't remember 227 with Jack A? What? And Marla Gibbs, there was a Florence from the Jefferson's. Now. You ever watched that ever? No. Amen. No. 227, you know what got? You watch such shitty television. Florence from the Jefferson's now Amen no

Do 2 2 7 you know what such shitty television as a child? I know that's you are black my friend. You really are black. Yeah, you really are black my brother 2 2 7 no doubt What is 2 2 7 I guess Never seen an episode. Times that change you know this. You know the song? I'll say my words. She was on Sesame Street. And then Jack A. You don't remember Jack A?

Mary. Oh, yeah. Hey, Mary. I Marla Gibbs's Mary. Wasn't she the maid from the Jefferson's? And this is the spinoff. No, it's not a spin-off. She's not Florence Right, but she's a different but she's the star of this. Yeah, is that the dude from Ghostbusters? No now Ernie Hudson your racist How will he's from private Benjamin the I'm looking at first of all I'm looking at the side of the TV I've been jade sure No, listen, but the is that the set of Sesame Street to the front of the bill? Oh very very possible and then the other Sherman it was Sherman Helmslees after

sitcom was a man Which I also watched a ton of and I bet that also was just on and not very funny It was all yeah was the eight now. I remember dear John, I feel like was funny. What's that? John, Deer John was John Hirsch. What and Kirk, you don't remember Kirk. They he was they was in a support group because you got the guys who got left by or people who got left by their. I don't even I don't even know what that was.

Dear John. Oh my God. Dear John. What the f what is this? I don't even I don't even know what that was What the what is this? Sad Oh Jay-Walks did All these sitcoms is this after taxi. Oh, oh wrong. That's all these sitcoms. Is this after taxi? Oh, yeah. Oh, God. Early mid-Aidies.

Oh, we're John. Billy Bird. And now he's by himself, and he moves into a building. And a part of me says, goodbye to his house. This was just on. This was not watched. It was just on. Oh, God.

I think coach was just on What a crappy show dear John you don't mean that a hundred percent made it where did it take place Cleveland? What I don't know just some shit hole. I've never even heard of this so it didn't stand the test of time No, of course not. This was a terrible show short live, but it was so good. It was based on a BBC This was so good. It was based on a BBC. This was not good. This is not good. I think it was. Judd Hersh is like quality actors. First of all, Judd Hersh weakest on taxi. Weakest. Yeah. Yeah. Of course. But did you, let me ask you, did you love Laca? I like Laca. Laca sucked. You thought lacquer sucked? Who's he? I think Andy Kaufman across the board sucks.

I don't get any sort of little bit of it at all. I think it's all nonsense. I did not like tax. How about Jim Carreyman on the moon? Fantastic. I love the story of Andy Kaufman. I love hearing stories of Andy Kaufman. When the story's over, the person telling me

is always like, eh, and I'm always like, yeah, what a fucking dick face, huh? What congalying out the audience. Oh, I feel that way about chip chippersin. I get to stand up. I think he stinks. But if they ever make a movie about him, I might like it.

Maybe that'll be good. The story of chip chippersin. Oh, so glad he's dead. Taxi was actually funny, right might like it. Maybe that'll be good. The story of Chip Chip. I'm so glad he's dead. Taxi was actually funny, right? Very true. Yeah, that was actually funny. Anybody watch Mash in here? I did.

Mash was funny. That was like my dad's show. I'll tell you, that was one of the ones we argued on Skanksia, that I was like, I don't think it really was. Never watch Mash ever in my life. Then when I had to move in with my foster father, my Jewish foster dad, that was his thing.

Every night he watched my... Was he a veteran of the Korean War? No, he wasn't. He was no war. I thought to be reminded every decade that I was alive, that that was not the Vietnam War that takes place. He's like, oh yeah, Korean War. There was a Korean War,

and I started watching it with him. And it's funny. Hock, I was very funny. All in all those, like, good comedic timing for sure. Very funny. I mean, Radar was funny. Who's the trans dude? My mom, Jamie Farr was funny.

Kanger, Corporal Klinger. Good writing on that show. Very funny show. My mom, I know my mom cried At the end of finale. Yeah, I guess a spoiler alert is it BJ honey cut does now No McLean Stevenson you're talking about when the what's the character who yeah, it's uh, oh, isn't it trapper? Trapper yeah, he he left he left Trapper goes home. That was the most watch TV show all time. Henry Blake died. How funny is it that

Trapper John MD became a show after that. Yeah That was Trapper John. What is that Wayne Rogers character? Oh, yeah, he took over and it became its own show Trapper John Where I think he did it was a MD, but he was a He solved crimes through surgery. Yeah. Mashed was good because they would just perverted doctors. It was trying to get laid every day. They were trying to bang nurses and tense and get shit-faced, huh?

Movies and scenes. Well, the movie, who was, who was in the movie again? It was a hot lips. No, yeah. And Donald Sutherland. Donald Sutherland, yeah. Was it in the Mashed movie? Yeah. It's a Robert Altman film. I never saw that.

Yeah, it was a very, it was a good movie. That's great movie. It was a great movie, but Mashed itself was funny. Remember, but then they went into like the 80s. It was almost like hair band TV when they went into the fall guy and a team. And they started doing like night rider. That type of bullshit. Yeah, we're taking back to them. I'm like, what were the fucking plots of the episodes? The A-Team would just be rolling around

and it's like, thank God you stopped for gas in this town. There's a major problem with the terrible cartel. Yeah, yeah. And they make a look at this. Let's always look at, and they make a cabbage launcher to fight the crows. It was like a Maghiver, It was before Maghiver, right? The Maghiver.

They'd have to, uh, they'd always have to drug BA, Barakis, because he couldn't, he could just free the fly, free the fly, and because he'd always drug him. The fall guy was the best plot because he was a legit stuntman, Hollywood stuntman who solved crimes on the side. Did you, that always involved stunt like

activities? Yeah, I have to, he was the only way to solve this murder is gonna have to be to, crimes on the side. Did you that always involved stunt like activity? He's got to be the only way to solve this murder is gonna have to be to jump off of a motorcycle and hope that when we get through this the thing I jump over I land back on it and he sang the theme song which is terrible. I run to this theme. Yeah, no. The best run to this team who's not you're known for Anyone who sings any actor who sings the opening of his own song an actor I won't even say it's about Actress but maybe even them too. There's no chance who's it Marvin? Lee majors you're not Lee marvin. He the only one who's ever done. I don't think anybody's I'm saying it ensures though that he is a

douchebag of a guy douchebag like world-class douche bag Well, he went from the the 10 million dollar man, which is not a lot of money Sorry, six. It is not a lot of money. Six million. Sorry, six million dollars. Long play, yeah. Right now it would be like the five trillion dollar man. It was like one. Married to Farrah falseth though. It was six million dollars. I could do that. Six million.

I can make a six million dollar man. If I really liquidated. Yeah. If I went full liquid. If I sold my tiny house, I could do a half a million dollar man. Yeah, that's more realistic. I could do a hundred thousand dollar man. All the shows when I was a kid that I couldn't miss, that I just, this is what I'm doing.

I'm watching the fall guy and then the dukes of hazard. But even earlier than that, like you said, Jay, happy days. They're all unwatchable now. But I will watch them for different reasons. Well, happy days, they're all unwatchable now. But I will watch them for different reasons. Well, happy days, you can't believe you watched it. It wasn't my thing. The Brady Bunch was before me, but it was such a big hit and replays, you know what I mean?

Laverne Shirley, I'm sure it was terrible. I defy you to get through an episode now. Yeah, I don't, you don't like that I could. The big raggo when he comes in. Carmon, regressor. You don't like the big ragu. All these things I could watch with other people to like laugh at the shittiness of it, but for pure your own entertainment, like it would not, now I know it wouldn't hold up at all. Yeah. They were bad. Swiggy Lenny and squiggy. But the all in the family, I watch the

episodes every episode is awesome pretty much every episode There is not a stanker of an episode where he's just being hilarious and calling her a big dummy I mean hit the way he treats Edith is terrible, but it's so funny and somehow she's comes out on top of most of the episodes But he's just so stupidly amazing. Yeah. And just remember, Do you remember the episode where the Black family moved to town? Yeah. That is one of my mom's favorite episodes of that show. She thought it was hilarious because he said,

there's not a chicken shack or a rib joint around here. Why would they ever want to live here? There he is, dude. hilarious. What was who was the Black family who played, was that, does that that Sammy Davis was on the show, they had like real legit guest stars on that show. Yeah, Sammy Davis was on the, he goes, what's your idea, I look in, that's something like

that. Yeah, bring up a couple clips, man, bring up the best of all the family, it's, it's fucking great. Can get us canceled on this show. I was trying, just saying I was trying to get full episodes, but there's a location services problem with this computer, so I can't get on Hulu. Okay, okay. Why are you talking like that?

Just so you know. Just go to YouTube and then go to YouTube. You know what? Just do it Archie Bunker compilation. Wanna talk to Douglas while we wait? What's Douglas want to talk about? All TV shows. Sure, Douglas.

Well, hello. Hello Douglas. Remember the show, Douglas Course I do That was a starring William Ragsdale who was also the star of fright night And there was a sitcom Bobby about Different parts of his personality and his brain And it would be him living his life Hank is area also on that show was his friend and it was the people living in his head that were his It was his brain so everything he did they'd go and do a scene in his head a lot of the Simpsons people came out

What was it called Herman's head? Come on. I don't I don't remember this shit. I Herman's head. Come on. I don't I don't remember this shit. I Never I've never seen this in my life. Herman's head What? Yeah, that's the thing's happening in his head. This is the worst. This guy has, that's Lisa Simpson. God. And this is a... These are the people in his head?

Yeah. I think there's too many people in this elevator. And I think you are all idiots. Let's go to work. This is when, when, like, actor actors were in sitcoms? Oh, yeah. Yeah, this guy, the boss. Yeah, these are all, like, Broadway-trained actors.

Well, no, that William Ragstale. Friday night one, Friday night two, Herman's head. Haha. That's all of it. Wow. That was a bad show. Douglas. You just thought they're Douglas?

Good show. Did you like Herman's head? Ran for one season. Yeah, um, Doug? Good show. Did you like anyone's head? Ran for one season. Yeah, I think I'm probably about the same age as you. So it was entertaining because there's people living in his head. Sure. And Jacob is old. You're correct.

True, Jacob is old. Yeah, he can't read. Fire back. Hahaha. Phone line is lighting up with the old TV shows. There's no that there's no way that show was good Her answer was not good. It was terrible. No, no for sure There was another one with Gina Davis something in the city maybe and that's where they introduced that girl when she was young and hot That was on Frazier don't want the goofy voice

She was younger on that show What was it called something sex something now something in the somebody in the city Sarah maybe Maybe Sarah in the city is that the all the family clip. Can you play that real quick? It's a racist archivunque compilation. Oh, please easy easy. This is on YouTube. I got you fine. You fine. Go ahead play this You don't own about lady Liberty standing there in the hopper with her twat shine high screaming out the wall of the nation's in a world send me your poor your deadbeats

your filthy and all the nation set them in here they come swallowing in my dance his Spanish PRs from the Calabona your jacks your china jacks out in your heaves, and you're leaving space. Nothing wrong with that.

Come in here, and they're all free to live in their own separate sections. It ain't feel safe, and then bust your head if you go in there. That's what makes America great. How much time do you have to talk to someone? You sound this is terrible. What's that? The sound, that's too bad. Somebody's doctors will tell you town. This is terrible What is that the sound that's too bad it's too all over the place. Oh, there goes that well I would meet somebody spin off the road if I heard that they did hurt my ears Do you have a beginning of Sarah Sarah in the cities that was called? Yeah, Gina Davis? How do you remember?

I mean, what was I doing? There you go. I was yeah, I was too but 90s television. Yeah, right. I was raised by good television. This was not good. Oh, well, look at her. I'm Bill Murray like him doesn't offer neck like that. She did write her book recently. She came out and said Bill Murray like she did not like working with him at all. And he was Sarah I said Bill Mario, like she did not like working with him at all. And he was a Sarah.

I thought you were my side. God damn it. How about it's a living. Remember that? Oh my god, she's about cocktail waitresses. She missed her trolley. She missed her trolley. Every day.

We always be surprised somebody's on a show that you're like, what? That's when every white kid had a bull cut on TV. Oh, yeah, for sure. I mean, you know what though TV was very Alfree Woodard Bill Maher. Wow Bill Maher Mark Hudson Bronson Pettbalkey Bartokimos I mean what a cast and the one of the Lawrence brothers Everybody in that show pretty much went on to something bigger that little kid just grabbed her tit What the fuck yeah, she has like a photo journalist like before Thelma and Louise. This is before she was famous

No, she was famous. It was like a thing that Gina Davis was doing a sitcom. You know they gave her a sitcom Now it's 1985 Yeah, no it was before Thumbin Louise. Yeah, I'm saying but it was but she was known she was in stuff She knew Davis it's a living. What was it? That was was their first movie or anything she was like you know a lot of stuff. What's it's a living? What was that? It's a living is a yeah, which is five hot chicks who work in a high-rise Cocktail bar and just cocktail waitresses trying to be funny that was a day when you could just pitch anything to a network and they do it oh for sure these were terrible what about Alice

what about Alice I do remember Alice the flow kiss my grits and Mel but that was pretty popular That was a big show and this was the one everyone loved What is her name and Jillian? She's beautiful And then yeah, they wrote for the have like a piano player guy He was supposed to be like the funny guy of the show. He was the Larry. Yeah, like the three-s company Larry of the show Uh, you watched it. Yeah, those are buddies. It's a pretty good show. Those are buddies probably funny Talented people and it was new heart funny. I think it was.

Yes, new heart was really funny. Bob Newhart is one of my favorite comedians. Standups? Yeah. It's great, dude. You ever listen to his album, The Button Down Mine. It's pretty good, man. Listen, man, I know you're edgy and you have a wallet hang.

You change on it and you have a scarf coming out of your back pocket. I get it. Which I was left with without today. God forbid. I have to call back Christina to bring it down. I know. I know you're an edgy, skanky comic. I live on the actual comic. You're so cool.

Yeah, you are. Big rock and roll comic. You are. But Bob knew hard. You drink it up, bad boy. Exactly. Thank you, Jacob. But Bob Newhart is funny. The show Newhart I did like a lot. Newhart's funny and the one before it

But what was that? That was called Bob Newhart or something. What was that called? What was the first one called the Bob New Heart Show? He had two. Yeah, it was the Bob New Heart Show and then the second was called Newhart I'll argue that Valerie slashed the Hogan family was very funny because that Jason Bateman was always pretty funny. He was always a pretty funny dude on new heart. No, I said the other show that kind of what that where was two shows Like that but the same thing like Bob Newhart show and the new heart Was Valerie in the Harper family remember that no one changed to the other. What was that? Who was the star of that Valerie? But no, who whose Valerie Harper? What dude? I'm sorry. I don't know this shit. I was doing drugs and fucking going to get arrested

Well, you are home with a remote and a lullipop and there you don't know what Valerie Harper is though. Is that Rota? Yes, is it Rota? Yeah, I know Rota. Okay. I know Rota. I know Rota. It's our age coming in I washed a little bit of mod. I remember mod. You know, I would not get any of these references. Dan. Dan wouldn't get any of these references. But he would go- But I'm more, but like Dan though,

pretty even Dan, yeah, like Deroza. Golden girls would be like my BR through thing, not mod. Even though I knew of mod like- Well, I knew of her as the goal, it should be the golden girl, I knew new heart, I didn't watch the Bob New Heart show. I didn't watch, I didn't either. Mary Tyler Moore wrote, I watched.

It was a little old, I was still young for that, but it was on. I watched the reruns of it. I never watched it while it was on, but you remember fish? The spin off of Barney Miller. Yes. When he was just a foster dad to drunk revolter and a bunch of assholes. Is that what it was? Yeah, I'm pretty sure

it was a foster dad. If I go to his big ass eyebrows. Yeah. That's hilarious. And his ugly, his Walter Mathau wife. They branched off. Fittu Barney Miller was a pretty shit show. I bet. It was stupid. I bet why it was bad was because how linden the guy who played Barney Miller. They call him in Hollywood and this again, where someone's definitely a douchebag. They go triple threat because then he would go on like TV shows and like it wouldn't be to be funny or even he would sing and dance to a little show tune in a tuxedo. I mean like fuck off dude.

Triple threat. They're triple threats and that Frank Snottroway. They act shitty. They sing whatever and you do it It's all the whole things non-standard acting's been come on yet crazy gal Why don't you get out there and do something right for once in your life like that's all over acting Music is easy as hell. They know one tap dancing move. Yeah, yeah, to tattoo to go to the tap You learned a routine and they just do the one move over and over again. I think tap dancing stinks and I think it's I think it's made up. I think it stinks. I saw when you love it. You love tap dancing.

I was love tap dancing when I was a kid. Tap dancing. I never did it. There's no like it's like when you see a drummer do something. There's always a big. Do that. Do go. Do go.

Do go. Something amazing. Tap dancing never gets it. It's like almost there. drummer do something there's always a big something amazing the drums tap dancing never gets you're triple threat for those things and you don't do any of them good. Yeah, Gregory Hines does a thing with Gregory and Sammy doing it. Yeah. You see that? Sammy was the big tap dance guy. Sammy was a big tap dance guy and Greg took them out of the crowd and they did a little thing together with a they kind of face off and Greg would do something and then Sammy would do something back and as I look

I then rather watch the jab walkies get down what's a jab walkie come on oh you mean the the little animals no what's a little animals what do you think that is what's a jab walkie is a mythical creature from an old story, but this is the jabble walkies dude Watch them go with little white masks. What a jabble walkie. Yeah, do these fucking Koreans know how to fucking move their bodies You know I love one of these guys dance and a big train of tron TV falls on their head. Oh, yeah That would also be great. Did you remember that? Did you see that? No.

You didn't see that when one of those... Oh, it happened? When the Korean dance team, you didn't see that? The whole big screen fell on them. Korean music band, they're on stage dancing and the fucking trinitron. Oh no, a tarot vision. Jacob, don't get mad. I have a disease. Jacob, I have a disease. It's a problem when he gets a head A.K.

speaks with an accent. I have a headache right now, okay? And it does tend to happen. You have not medically been diagnosed with foreign language disease. Really? I bet I can have my doctor write me a letter for it. Oh my god. Yes Falls I mean Do is that what you did for sure? Watch this dude you gotta just see I mean this is fucking

It's nuts. That's and they haven't such a good time. It's having a good time. You guys. I mean the audience is screaming as they should as they just witness a horror in life. It's the worst one of the worst things I've ever seen on the internet. It's one of the worst things ever. But play the audience noise. Oh God. What is that on YouTube? I should not have to see it. It must live.

He must have lived. Because otherwise I don't think they put it on. Oh, they, yeah. I thought it was a girl. I mean, you gotta... I mean, in that country they're all hairless, but... I mean, whoa. Go! Oh, God.irless but I mean whoa go all right I'm gonna just what I'm looking at the thing is this thing why not be as bad

as we think it is well that's I'll be honest with you it may it may look significantly worse by the way it says it's screencrash it down to dancers at Hong Kong concert what a disrespect to the one who ate the entire thing. Somebody else got nipped maybe, but like that person ate the entire profile of a jumbo trot. Yeah, that one got like a little piece on his ankle. Yeah, dude.

Oh, it's like fucking Harris standing in the art, in the fucking Tracy Morgan accent. He's like, my pinky actually is sore all the fucking Tracy Morgan X in. He's like my pinky actually is sore all the time now. I'll take a few mill. Yeah dude. Alright well check it out. We're gonna take a break. We do have to take it. Check it out. We got to take a break. Fuck you by. Good bye. Hey everybody. Thanks for listening. That was just a portion of our actual serious XM radio show. If you want the whole thing, go to SiriusXM.com slashbombfire for a special offer. That's right, and go to bigjcomedy.com and robbercallylive.com to check out our standup dates

coming to a city near you. Go lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo