The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Every Rose Has A Thorn

Episode Date: July 12, 2022

The crew is heartbroken about the cancelation of a hair metal work trip!

And now the bonfire with Big J. Okreson and Dan Soder. Boom! Oh man, I like that DJ look at Luz with DJ and he's just throwing his drops. Yeah, when he puts on his rosy the riviter hanky chill thought his head. When he rolls up his sleeves. You white lady! You white lady. I'm a fine lady. You white lady! You white lady! You white lady!

Black was over there trying to fix whatever Christine ruined over there. What is it? My darling Christine is home today. Home sick. She doesn't have the headphones. She does not have the coronavirus. Headphone jack over here is fucked. Everything's fucked dude. Welcome to the bonfire. Hated here. Serious sex and facts to talk 103. I'm dance odor That's big J.O. Crescent. Hey as he said Christine's not here, but the rest of the crew is DJ Lewitsky Jacob a tot and back from vacation are black king the black tiger Lewis And returning with him Black Lou show rundowns buddy

Buddy, I don't know what yeah check it yeah take a phone call check up take a fake phone call was your girlfriend oh what you say we have to connect with zoom with her I forgot but we don't have to yeah dude let it be a boy's day it worked man it would be a boy's day chill out yeah dude laid out going to sleep time if I go yeah he's fucking's your week? Gonna zoom in? You're gonna left it hanging out all day. She's that kind of sick when she comes Will you come in and it's supposed to be sexy, but she goes like And her left-tits just out and I put your goddamn tidaway. She's cover up grandma sick. Put your tidaway lady

Oh, man. Oh, you're sick. I could see your pulse. Everybody can smell my dirty pussy. Whoa, why did she say that ever? We'll never know. We're not getting off this topic. Black Lou. No, we're not getting off the topic. We are spoiled by you. And you going on, Jacob, first off, we love you very much.

Black Lou, having these rundowns back feels amazing. I gave you rundowns. Oh, you gave us, you gave us, you gave us, you gave us, you gave us, I felt like it's a clip that you're doing. I think it was on cliffhanger all week. I'm like what do we talk about next? Is this I was doing a lot of stage directions? Yeah, I didn't know if it was if how to get back a victim it was a Jacob you tried and we love you Because I don't put the fancy photo. It's I mean

The fancy photo is nice Put the fancy photo. It's I mean the fancy photo is nice for our shutdowns, but I don't know how I didn't even think it was possible to put a photo on a piece of paper. Yeah, that's part of it. There's computerized highlighting letting us know the important thing of the day is that everybody know that Pandora playlists of the weach of the weach. Pandora playlists of the week. If you search for bonfire, S6M, it's gonna be Christine's red redondo playlist. Very beach vibe.

It's not gonna be red. It's a little, it's a little blink on a tits, a little real big thing. I'm gonna rate you to show you what a homo you want. What? You said I was gonna do a yacht rock one, but I gotta be honest. I think I'm gonna do a different genre.

What are you gonna do? I don't know. Speak from your heart. I can change it, Listo. Absolutely. Okay, because like, I don't know. Speak from your heart. I can change it, Loha still? Absolutely. Okay, because like, I don't know. Here's the thing with Yacht Rock. It's even if it's not, like, realistically,

once a people are gonna enjoy, there's 80 songs, 60 songs maybe, but it's those songs on every, there's a Series XM Yacht Rock channel, which I love, by the way, but it's those songs, do you know what I mean?, I mean for cross sailing. Sure. Obviously, yes, definitely one of them all the Michael Donald, yeah, we said it together like on the MC. Yeah, you know the ones. Ambrosia, it's always gonna be. It's the same kind of shit. So I don't think I'm gonna make a playlist. It's gonna make people go like, oh, shitty pulled out this one, you know, but there's something I could do that for and not that you're not gonna know it yeah just like you're gonna be like I'd rather have people have like a fuck dude

yeah damn that's a good song yeah I don't know what genre that's gonna be yet but once you find it you'll put it out once I find it I black who's just like hey what's your time to like a 70s stoned rock. Great. Throwin' some fuckin' sick Sabbath in there. Yeah, cook it up, dude. Stuff that you know, but you forget about it. Get it goin'. Put it down, dude.

Put it down. Put that shit straight there. I had to be instructed. Blackloos was like top 10 queens of the Stone Age songs. I think I can do that. Anyway, Jacob, so I guess, thanks for last week, just punching a keyboard, handing us a piece of paper. Here's the thing, Jacob, Jacob, you know,

like I said, the effort was there, he gave it, but it was also just like random topics. It was none of the topics that were actually on the run down that Black Lou made, so it was weird. It was like getting a different silence. Yeah, and some of them were just like instructions would be like, speak up. Yeah, no video.

No, that's completely different. I just wrote that on the fly, but his run down, he doesn't, he didn't send it to me, so I couldn't, I didn't have it. Oh, you think this was sabotage? Oh if you would have given you stuff he's saying the black who sabotaging Jacob he's trying to make your job obsolete Jacob that's why you kept that's why you kept pushing the narrative that he was down on Epstein Island last week

I don't think you have them all to yourself Jacob let me try to run down every day oh Jacob instead of getting, just understand that we love you. And it's just a fun little thing to make fun of, you know? His run down looks a lot more professional than mine. I'll give you that. I don't know if I agree with Jacob that you spent the whole week on Epstein Island, Black Lou, but I will say, you like loose,

like you've been massaged. Yeah. With the tiniest of tiny hands. It was vacation good. Very good. Yeah. With the tiniest of tiny hands. Was vacation good? Very good. Yeah. Very time. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I gotta say, listen, certain islands, I feel like they should be purchased. Yeah, and that's one of them. I think, yeah, two of them at the same time.

They're for sale for like 125 million. Oh, Epstein Island? Epstein Island. Is there a remax? Epstein Island is a 125 million million only for that one and the Great St. James that he also brought There's two islands. Yes, he had a foreign fucking country. That's a lot of money unless you have that kind of money Like I bet Kevin Harkin spend that kind of money, but I will say this

It is there is something that can happen that can wipe your islands off the earth. I bet the percentage, chance of that is so much higher for an island than Oklahoma. I know there's tornadoes and shit, but do you know what I mean? The odds. You're saying the ocean turning on that island and swallowing it back? I mean, Hurricane Sandy destroyed everything I owned on in Long Island, New York. You also have a longstanding beef with storms.

That's a retrial. Of a fleet of 14-year-old girls and bikinis bailing water. Maybe that's why it's like the perfect thing. Do they come with the, do they come with the island? Now they're all 18. Oh, the ghosts of their innocence live there still. Do they haunt the place like school and will have Scooby--Doo adventures. Yeah I could have got away with it. Do they do people talk about the island a lot like when you're in town? Oh absolutely. In town on

the water. Do they do a little sunset cruise and that's all the girl wanted to talk about. Have they started doing that? That's the island with my daughter became a little woman. Did they do FC Nyland tours? It's kind of like a haunted house tours where they go. That's the veranda where he took several young lovers Oh, yeah, it wasn't an Epstein Island tour. We were just on the way to get some pizza on the water and the islands on the way He's like, do you want to go buy it? Oh, yeah, you say yes. Absolutely. Is it the long route? But you still said you gotta do it. You'll notice in the grass there's a bunch of nerf balls that have not been picked A bunch of roofed tennis balls in the room. It's all stuff that kids leave behind If you look on the roof, you'll see three frisbees

Another another abandoned scooter You must have chased this one out in the woods a bunch of of tied-degayther sheets Roaps hanging out of windows. Yeah, yeah, yeah, we're escapes. Try to have it with dog with dog pits at the bottom of them. There's so many cans with cut strings on it. Yeah, they took out their columns. I wish Epstein would have a Rambo booby trap this thing.

You just walk it off the sun. You get like eight sticks in your gut. But it's I it'd be like you know when they go back to Jurassic Park, that's what it's like when you go to Epstein, it's just the remnants of fucking Panifiles. By the way, not to jump on by no, we always like jumping in for two seconds. Another thing, in Rambo, Rambo did one of the best foreshadowing scenes ever in a movie though, because when he was sitting there just thinking whatever they show him very much like making a batch of sharpened wooden sticks.

And then 15 minutes later those sticks swing around and fucking stab I think that gets karuso right in the legs and you're like oh sticks. Hey, that's so big though. Pretty good. I don't think it didn't go a notice. They did that a lot though and then like all the sequels, that always show him making a weapon that it inevitably became the thing

during the time. Exactly. Because you thought it'd be a grenade attached to an arrow. You knew it. Arrow grenade, there it was. Yeah, and then we'll show him you make it. And then everyone will see the process, the little science from here.

I'll make sure you was whole process, so a member was like, let him know I time my shoes I put a belt on I put a bandana I Put on a trinket from someone who has died that makes me sad and angry You black Lou you said there's a theory that he's still alive that Jeff Rambon still a lot both of them now John J. Rambo walks around Lambo they say you still alive? They think he's still alive absolutely. Certain people down there definitely.

I never even doubted that around as an idea. And that would be the ultimate, dude, if he faked his own death. Who did it? I mean, got a lot of power. Anybody see a body? Hmm? Calling if you saw the body. We want to exume it.

The bonfire gets rights to Jeffrey Epstein's body to... I'd like to at least throw our hat in the ring. You know to I like to at least throw our hat in the ring You know what I mean at least throw our hat in the ring anyway Jacob We computer a literate You run down their wacky They make a sad make sure you hit up black loot next time don't just blame him Help him maybe we're next to give me some topics also He is right though. We did the show up and kind of they're in my phone He went actually. Give me some topics also. Ooh.

He is right though. We did the show up and kinda. They're in my phone. Jacob, they're in my phone. Yeah. Oh, you son of a bitch. Was this your first? I don't know. Was this your first long trip with Hendrix?

Yeah, this was the first one. Through the airport and shit. Everything. How do you like the plane? He liked it for the first three hours and then he started getting really anti. How far was the flight? Four. Okay. So that last hour was coming down to him just starting to squirm, kick. Yep. And then you got those little legs kicking right in the nuts. Can't stop him. Did you fly a lot with his belt? A little baby? Never. Not once. Really? No,

no, Carla did a whole bunch. And I'd be like, I gotta work. Yeah, it's not a lie. I did have to work, but here's the thing. I'm not good at being like, I get it. Do you know what I mean? I get the perspective of somebody else like handling something different, you know what I mean?

Sure. Doing the thing, doing like, you mean traveling with a baby. Yeah, I get, when someone else has a baby, I feel for them. Yeah. And I don't get mad at them. I don't, I don't know that like fucking Jesus Christ, like, I feel for completely, but I also wouldn't do well being the person with it happening because I'm sorry.

Because I'm not just going like, my thing is I just like, come on, let me try to calm her down, calm her down. It's like let me calm her down So no one in here fucking make some griper thing that's gonna make me get furious when I also agree with them Yeah, but I'm also like don't be a fucking cunt about it. It don't be mad. Yeah, don't be mad You piece of shit. You think this rules. I could just and I could see it's just like I was like yeah, you could just take her Rules I could just and I could see it's just like I was like hey you can just take her You got plus they always wanted to go places where I think they would kidnap me

You know, I mean like fucking Colombian jungles and shit and then my ex would always go They're not gonna kidnap you don't be come from any money. I go. They're not gonna find that out until they get me Yeah, and then they find out my parents are broke. They're gonna kill me Then you're just gonna be dead me. I'm gonna let me go and be like with the descriptions of them all, I'm very descriptive. Sorry about that. Go on back to the airport. Do you know anybody who's got a little one that we can do that?

I describe a perfect caricature of him. He was standing on a skateboard and spinning a basketball. He had a giant mouth. His head was enormous. His body was super tiny. Go get him. Traveling with him, did you were you afraid

that he was gonna cry on the? Super afraid. I mean that's you're just holding a little cry grenade Oh, yeah, you get on the plane and you're like, please don't fucking explode But is your thing all isn't it also like you're like god damn it like someone's gonna complain because this happens and Like now I'm in a thing. Yes. Yeah, that's so scary thing And like now I'm in a thing. Yes. Yeah, that's that's so scary thing We started getting fussy were you like be cool be cool. Any some white bitch behind you don't like going like oh here we go Yeah, I mean it's like with someone just just something small like that would turn around be like hey, Chwatt

Please, you know, I mean can I have another fuck off? Can I have another inside's dead and you can't have children? I'll go for it There was a kid on the flight that I wanted to fight though. Yeah bring it up. I'm having a real hard time here that I'm here in the show and bits and pieces Turn these headphones up Maybe this will be a little bit better. Jesus Christ. I have a phone sucked too. Mike, I mean, this one just goes out and you got to like tap it. Yeah.

Siri 6.7. What's going on? Siri 6.7. In fact, I got a phone that picked with Siri 6.7. Oh. Well, before we go down there, I don't want to, because we're going to go down a big path down there. In Black Lou, I want, when I want to get too far away

from talking about fighting kids. Okay. Because the subject, we want to talk talk about is a big subject. Oh yeah But fighting kids at the airport I get there was a kid maybe six rows up from me on the plane who Scream like an adult man. What I mean I want milk Hey! Ah! I'm certain I want milk! I'm horny and I want drink!

Scared of the pressure. It's just childlike things out of a man's voice. Scared of the speed! Dip it into my 401k! What was he yelling about? His mom went to the bathroom. And he just lost it. And he lost his fucking mind.

Mom! Was he just yelling mom? Yes, mommy. She's shitting She's first-year shitting Please come back please please I won't leave you ever again mom. Please. I miss you mommy This gonna be a crazy and he had it like a man's voice my weenis is wet my diaper My wet weenis suck on your bobo's Those are tits Those are breasts

His voice that was a little deep it was deep for a kid. Yeah, dude. That's fucking crazy I'm bangin down your dog I don't want you to go anywhere. I'm being a bomb back and doing it done. Blu. They got to fix up the thing in here. It's insane. You want to try this one, Jay? Just a check.

Yeah, sure. So we test the elasticity of this thing nice dude I can control your volume now Hello, hello, that's good. It's working All right, so now we have to put me I'm attached to a cord. Don't lean back too far. I can't I cannot. Oh, it's Christine here. She said she can't hear us. Oh, I hooked her up. Oh, yeah.

Hey, you want me to hook you up? It's okay while you were going, Luke came over and hooked me up. What does that mean? Trimger. That was a term that did always sound weird to me and they meant it about getting hair cut But what a black people would say goes yeah, I went over in the cam to my boys house. He hooked it up It was how's that mean what do you think it's got stuck each other's dicks? He hooked me up was nice like tickets or something

You hope they shit up Queen now queen now bring up sure serious XM We've had talked for a long time about doing the Motley crew, Def Leopard, Poison, Joan, Jet concert, working on the idea that they would all stay healthy enough to be able to perform this tour. They've somehow managed to this point, right, Jacob? He said dropping like flies, though. Well, my last thing I heard Brett Michaels was in the hospital Tommy Lee is only playing the first three songs and Yeah, and Niels voices Vince Niels Really feel like a dickhead to play through this song

That was fun. I'm gonna cut out but then I'm also in the next date and then some other guys get yeah I'm just gonna be backstage I'll grab a hot, check it this out. Maybe walk around, say what's up. Yeah, hey, if you guys wanna take a picture, or like, you know, see my long thin weiner. He just does three songs and then. I think he cracked four ribs.

So then Tommy Clofetus, the guy of police, Ozzie's drummer, there's no slouch. Yeah. Comes out and does the rest of the show. Yeah, that's substitute teacher energy. No, it's getting Excited for you. I don't know. Wait a second. Black loop go back to Christine's playlist. I don't see them It's a song she's never heard of before somebody else told her She's trying to look cool. But what's the what's that third beer? Okay, I'll take that. What is this?

Miller Cohen no cigar Somebody else told her that. Keep going, all this falls into her horse shit. Oh, I'll out, keep going. Wait, wait, wait, what's that? Bamber Legion, okay, I'll accept it. Okay, it's only like three bands total. One of her songs was on the,

we have a crossover song from the KFMA Day playlist. Who was yours? Pennywise, bro, him. Really? KfMA day playlist. He was yours Pennywise bro him really yeah KfMA day, huh? Yeah, they played the first KfMA day. I was at saving real. It is a real thing. Okay I've never been to what her heart of it. She go. Oh Should I know if it still goes KfMA day probably pro jam deep cuts to J. Hey, why is everyone something that I hate? Yeah, Dan's KfMA day bro him there it is dude You and Christine thinking on the same level

Well, I don't know if she's gonna what log into the show here, but she let's hope she feels better She is down for the count and she was hoping Taking off today getting one more day arrest maybe She'd be able to go to marble because we had this awesome plan to go see Motley crew Death Flipper Poison and Joan Jet and then we found out today That series exact The only the monopoly on satellite radio

Absolutely says we have no that we can't get an okay to broadcast from the parking lot. And we can't get tickets to be in the show at all, quite frankly. And, uh, almost saying is if like we prefer you didn't come. Not like you can come, but it's not a great deal. They're like, yeah, it's just don't do this, which hurts.

And I'll tell you what, we're gonna turn the dogs on you if you show up. You show up, we're gonna hit you with the fire hose. Listen, open your ears, fucking you fat cats up there on the, what, how many four does this place? Three now. 37.

You have fat cats up on 37. You piece of the shit. Tom, Tom from Gast Digital. You have that cats up on you fat cats up on 37 you pieces of shit Tom Tom from gas digital Tommy rebounds you might know him as mid-range Tommy the guys fucking lights out from anywhere inside the key It's such a big penis Tom for gas digital has full press passes

Full put the whole passes to walk around, the whole pass is to walk around, tickets, the whole thing. Nothing, Tom. Really? Tom does, I think ads sales, ads sales for gas digital. Insane. That has to mean it's personal. Huh?

That has to mean it's personal. They didn't want us to go. You're saying that, because then if you're not saying it's personal You're saying that serious XM can't get the authority to get tickets. What is the serious XM? Do you don't have the ability to get no concert with the same excess as Tom and no range Tom and no Rebo and no offense Pennsylvania, but we're talking Hershey P. We're talking Hershey P. Hey, we're talking second tier I'm a hundred pounds thinner than the next chick that's gonna be at that concert Yeah, but we're talking Hershey P. We're talking Hershey P. Hey, we're talking second tier

I'm a hundred pounds thinner than the next chick that's gonna be at that concert You piece of the shit Damn, dude, they just said no to us. Yeah, you know why this is what they said and I'm like I heard this was the Concern oh, you guys are gonna go there and make fun of the whole thing. Yeah, and I go I said we're not gonna make fun of the whole thing because We're actually excited to go I. I was very excited to go. Jacob, super excited to go, Luzix, everyone's excited to go to this thing. And we're like, we're not gonna talk shit about. We're gonna like, we'll bus balls because the people watching is gonna be great and everything. Then we're excited for the show. Joe and Jett, come on man. Yeah. And now we can't go. I'll be happy to sit here and trash every single one of these bands. How about that? You fucking crusty assholes. Jacob, who are you most excited to see? So

I could shittle over them before you make you feel better about this. It's a toss up between Motley Crune Def Leopard. Def Leopard has a channel on Series XM by the way Jay. They're own channel. They're own channel here. Not even through them. They couldn't get his nose bleeds and let us use a zoom recorder in a parking lot. You got to think you just do that. If they would just pay for parking,

we could have just done that. Tell us we could expense the parking and we could have zoom recorded from there. They said they don't trust that internet will be able to get the show uploaded fast enough. They don't trust the internet of 2022 unethan believable. We can send Lou off to a library to handle if he had to

This is the Hershey public library. The Sir She Public Library Library, I say library I did I said all the time. I said that's the word I always fuck up library library Got him really really like rary not library shut up dude shut your fucking mouth wrong wrong It was just funny because we were already and then Jacob just made the call and he's like it's not happening dude I was just tied dying bandana's a tie around my head Fuck man look at you I was cutting my Manchester into a V like a walker on the parking lot in Gene Short's.

What's the name for Brett Michaels? That they had the poison didn't play one show because he was in the hospital. I don't even know if he's out. What's he, can you look at why he's in the hospital? He's right in the back. Because he's old and he's still running down. Too much pussy as an old man.

It actually becomes bad for you when you fuck when you're too. There we go. It's Christine just watching us and not speak if she wants. Oh, I believe. Can you hear me? Yeah. I really I had my camera off, but I had I can't believe Tom has that hook up and we couldn't get the hook up. Tom, Tommy rebounds. You know, it's funny. So I'll tell you what happened. I said this is how I even found out Once we found out we weren't going I texted the basketball boys. I don't know if you know this but Tuesday morning I like to go out there and slice them up on the court and Tom's one of the guys who comes to play every week and I said hey, you know, hey guys basketballs on tomorrow

Didn't work out With the concert I was supposed to go to, so basketball normal time. Everybody wrote back, except for Tom, who called and he said, I was gonna text us, but it's funny to tell you, you're not going, because what happened with the show, and I told him I go, I couldn't get access to record in the parking lot and sit somewhere.

I bet we could have gone to the Hershey City Council and gotten moved. Probably two phone calls from making this happen. I bet at least one of the things that bitches is watching episode of Billions. And if he really pays attention, he's gonna see two stars of the show, calling to ask the broadcast for a rock band

that hasn't moved units since the 80s. You mother. And we're gonna sit here and fucking act like we can't get in to record that. I wanted to watch press. I was gonna use so much press for this. And yes.

When I tackled kissed a Joan Jett on the mouth. When I called it a hepatitis parade, yeah, that would have came down negatively on the fans. Yeah, but so what? But I was going for laughs. You fat cats. You mean fat cats. Yeah.

Take all your profits. Take all your profit margins. Yeah, have fun performers for that stadium fill of before pictures. P90. You guys all fat and gross. Get out of here. I don't want, we were gonna go down there and watch. Richard Simmons wouldn't even feel bad for that fat fuck audience. Yeah, you fucking guys. Sweating with the oldies. You fucking assholes.

Finally, I was gonna, I was gonna feel comfortable taking my shirt off at a place. Now fuck it. Yeah. Jay was finally gonna go shirtless. Finally. You blew it. I was about to jump around shirtless. The rock star was taking the emergency room as it brought Michael's just moments before he was set to go on stage. According to TMZ, I committed being the show to go, brad,, you guys all guessed it. Something went down right before the show.

His beat, he's got him, right? Boy, what? He was treated at a local hospital. Everyone knows he's got a sweet tooth. He had an advert, hit a negative reaction to a medicine related to COVID-19. Oh, I'm sick of everything being COVID. In him, dude, his diabetes.

I wonder if he took, I ever mected. I wonder if he took Joe Rogan meds and fucking went down He's on the phone with Rogan and he's like I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna shake this horse I'm doing I've remected man. Um he apologizes to fans. Oh What do you say? I think you have to if you leave right before you go on? Sorry guys. They had to unskitty bought me over to the hospital Turns out there were some nurses that needed some dick and so I had to run out of it. That's like the

way you try to play the dance, but I still rock and roll. I had to go fuck at the hospital. Sorry everyone that waited to see me. I'll be back until then talk, talk healthy to me. But you already said The concert tomorrow is the big comeback show he's wants to put on the performance of a lifetime Yeah, why would you say that knowing we got shut out of that show? Is that true? I didn't care until I was ahead line we go up to that I My god dude. I wasn't mad until but I just made that realization He's the last one. The last article.

He plans to be 100% full of Hershey Park show. He tours as well. It hopes to be close to what I'm saying for Hershey show. Wow, go down. You know this show means a lot to him tomorrow. Hell yeah, the rock singer was hospitalized, prior to performing at concert, due to what he refers an unknown complication on social media,

poison basis, Bobby Daltor, all these, the Michael DeSufferter reaction, and medication prior to canceling their performance. But I'm grateful, by the way, can I say something on a show like this? When I went to Osfest one year, Ozzy Osborne had to bail on one of the shows I went to, and Rob Halford played with Judas Priest,

and then stepped in and lead sang for black Sabbath the whole night. It was awesome Hey, Joe Elliott or fucking whatever somebody jump out of the fucking asshole. Yeah, there's not somebody on On Joan Jets crew that wants to fucking go out there and sing the poison song. Come on, man Go do the hitch a piece of shit. Let's somebody sing. It's fun Let it be fun for like an audience member or something. Yeah, swap hold son of a bitch is for the vincenials like you know I can only say this all I can say do what if a guy goes out there and just crushes it Nothing in that the whole premise of rock star Hoping by Hershey PA. I'll be back close to 100% and resume the meet and greets before the show. I love meeting the awesome fans. It fires me up.

Imagine how I would have felt Jacob the way you would have fawned over him. When we just covered you with fluorescent pandanas the way I planned on. Elbows knees. And now that I hope Amazon takes those back. Yeah, I'm rushed to that was prime delivery prime I'm furious Tom and min radius tom's is not gonna go. He's gonna come play basketball He's not going no

Doesn't even mean that he has access and it doesn't even he got that so he can come like bullshit with us Oh, that's where he thought he's like, I probably got to get press access. These guys are serious access. No, made it happen. These guys are probably going to be in the back interviewing all the bands. I wonder if they're going to have time to hang out. Oh, wait, they're not allowed into the parking lot to talk to each other.

Dude, Tom's probably, he could have probably had lunch with them at catering. I bet college radio stations have better access to this show. Oh, that itch lane C-Bass, that was good. Yeah, I'm working on my Tom. Is was good. Yeah, I'm working on my Tom Is that a good Tom I'm working on my Tom now the dog Dylan showed it to me. It's a good impression

Damn, he's gonna be a hundred percent tomorrow. Well, I gotta tell you this one serious 6M Fakets listening Should be shamed yourselves. You should at least be able to achieve the same thing as Tom. Tom. What if it turns out that Tom's like got a crazy access, like point, like he's like, actually the president of NBC runs what you don't know about Tom is he's related to a lot of very powerful people, a lot of movers and shakers in the state of New York and Rockefellers. Yeah.

Oh, yeah, I forgot. I might as well build gates. Damn, yeah, Tom just like, I'll play basketball. It's fine. I'll throw these away. Yeah, dude. Reck's going down to, because I really want to go, but we have to call it at the call it because it was like, maybe we can find the McDonald's near the venue to record.

McDonald's? I'm just saying like, a McDonald's near the venue? Pick a place. We shouldn McDonald's near the venue to record. I'm just saying, like a McDonald's near the venue. Pick a place. We shouldn't have near the venue. If we were a podcast, we could just go and do it in the parking lot. It's what we were gonna do. They just let us know that they don't want us to do that.

Yeah. I don't know. That's crazy. We're just gonna record from Jay's car. Big Jim. Open heaven. I don't want these fat cats. Big Jim, I got to talk to him. Big Jim up in 37 in 37 I know they look after us I know the fat cats are trying to

of course do you big big Jim up in 37 please get us tickets to deflepper in poison we won't be bad anymore but big Jim and hear me out now and he should go to bat first now because now we now we look like As holes who come through with nothing That they see you're gonna do you know we've kind of just been doing that ourselves now, but no serious needs to get behind some of these ideas I'm buzzing basketball Bonds and basketball or butts and basketball whatever you are called butts and basketball I can make it a white one called butts and basketball flat butts

We were called but some basketball. I can make it a white one called but some basketball flat butts We just want your fucking thick hips Tiny butt white ladies dude get ready for the pancake games. Whatever it is man. I just want Girls in G strings playing basketball flat 80s butts dude. Let them be flat 80s butts dude. Give me those double mid-point butts. I want their fat pink lips to far to the side of their loose bikinis So buns and basketball or butts and basketball both dude the odd thrupple come on These are all killer ideas. What was the other one live reading? Clon mills presents we gotta do that uh... uh...

we got to do that w-m-b-a-sweet high-end facelifts for everyone for everyone i mean put those eyebrows back where they were get ready for you so damn this weekend was pretty fun tell me a magic

tell me about it oh dude That's a big old plastic Beverly Hills face you blinking it rips your hairline off Yeah, we got I mean nothing we say nothing that comes through honestly. I don't want to be this guy, but a comedy central this would have been a layout Comedy Central would have been all over this gym. They had been like, they probably would have lived, they would have been like, I see your value. They would go, that's such a good idea. We always trust in what you guys want to do.

And then they'd probably go, take Daniel Tosh with you and go, what? Yeah, and then they were, cross over. Yeah, and then they were like, if you need the extra money for the gigs and petty cash, we'll just take it out of Nicky's. I got no, she just like 10 reads a day. Yeah, yeah, and they were like, okay.

So that's just, we were dealing with Connie Central. I know right now we're Series XM and by the way, a lot of things here have been great, but I feel like flowers in the attic in here. I mean, dude, getting just straight up told no for the parking lot. For the parking lot. The damn parking lot. I mean, it promises. You straight up told no for the parking lot for the parking lot damn parking lot I mean as promises you flowers in the act this you came upstairs and you're like I'm getting married and things are gonna be great And then you're just feeding this arsenic cookies and I think what exactly Huh, we told you Christine no, he said it was four passes and four press

Christine no, he said it was four passes and four press or press passes. So that was I don't know who's for I think it was a yeah You're right. James right. It was eight. It was a six. It was it was aren't the amount of our crew that we're going to six can Tom Colin Christine. You have Tom Colin, please. Yeah, please. Oh Colin I like to see I like the time it's difficulty of this. He this keep bringing them up. We're like, yeah, it's awesome Yes, we're talking to time anyway guys like Tom said the other day that um Tom was chosen good lately Tom was like damn Tom. What are you doing here? Yeah, your midrange is nice or is this silence in the show and I go? See that's like top said you know did what not nothing. I don't know what is the other day we were order food and Tom goes.

I just fucking he was I made him laugh milk out of his nose. Tom really laughs at my jokes. Oh Tom. I hope he calls in. He also maybe didn't get to hear good mind questions become my Tom impression. But, is he called, is he in? Oh, we have another caller. Yes. And says what, they also are just a person

who got free tickets. I'm actually broadcasting for the party. They have to show. It's like part of the parking, you have to do a podcast. Except you guys. They wouldn't let us do it from the parking lot except I've been working here guys remember for 10 years Well, you know what Dominic? We're breathing down your neck at seven and we don't have any actually over right now Gorilla podcast I guess but we're a little bit we gave up that life

That's for Jay to live on Monday like nights. I'm contractually restricted to not that's for jay to live on monday like night i'm contractually restricted to not ever you have me bound and we can't even fly you can't let this be one we want serious xn to want us to do this we don't want to go real live this i was aiming from chicago you on can we hear me can you hear me yeah there you are a me you saw brad michael's recently yet i saw him before the pandemic.

I lived in the Northwest suburbs of Chicago and he came out to do our festival around Fourth of July, like a few years ago. And we've had big names, we've had pretty big names in the year. And I was skeptical, my sister was one of the people who watched Rock of Love. I always thought he was cheesy and just the way they looked was weird. always thought he was cheesy and you know just the whole

the way they looked was weird yeah he but you know what he put on the most incredible show he is so appreciative of his fans he is far from he is he's fantastic and he talks about his diabetes and how it has

changed the light what is it that's crazy, I drew a party song. You guys don't want to get serious, you gotta make sure you check your sugar level. Oh, unskitty boppy goes, actually lately guys, it's been skinny bopp for me because you know, unskitty bopp is unnecessary sugars. Guys, my body is a hard time processing. Guys, if you feel like you're gonna crash or whatever, we have George Michaels's diabetes apple temps.

We'll give you an apple, you could take a bite of some natural sugar and I also guys I make sure all my shows these balls up here in front I think there's orange slices if you guys need to suck on an orange slice Hershey, this is the show of the left time hold on. I got to check some letters To be checked my pop Yeah, the pump yeah, let me check my pump All right, if you guys the money goes CC pick up that guitar and I'll keep by the audience while I stuck on a lolly pop I Am spiraling Oh Christine only things against oh, hey Are you picking stuff out of the lockings? I've been doing that a lot too. I don't know if they are they do she have non-stop ticks or weird things in her fur

I don't know if they are they do she have non-stop ticks or weird things in her fur. I don't know. It's you. I blame you. Are you really doing the show from bed? You look like a scuzz. You look very pretty, but you look like a scuzz sitting there. I think I put like a zoom filter on because I don't look this good. All right well don't fucking shoot yourself in the foot. Whatever. Jay gives me the first compliment in seven years. Hey, she knows. Nice. Right in. God, Dave, Christine, you handled good things worse than I do.

Did Jay was like, you look pretty, you know, but you're a scuzz. You're being cute, kind of rustling your hair. And you got nuts and falter. I'm a fucking piece of shit. Come on, Christine. I accept it. That was a nice compliment from Jay. It was a nice compliment.

I will say, when I saw Brett Michael, on Z Rock, when Brett Michael did the dick move of saying he was going to film with us, well, we could film him. He was going to do these scenes with us. They didn't went down until you could film the show, but you can't. He's not going to do anything on the show now in the lines. And then last minute, he says, you could film the bus. What? While we pull away.

It's where to go. It was insane. It was a dick move. We were there all day for nothing. For absolutely nothing. Wait, so you guys were, everyone was on, where was this at at the Rose? Okay, he's out in a long island.

So you show up like ready to film. And then they're like guys. You would show that at night for real. Yeah, so you guys want to film a lot. It's the episode that's all about my character. Remember the whole things we're trying to get back for the Brett Michael show. Yeah, I love it.

That's the one where you go by Regis Filman's house. You guys get put in jail. I love that one. Yeah, it's, but that's the episode it ends with then we get to the Brett Michael show and then Brett Michael's bus is pulling off. That's it will change the story. So originally at the end of the episode,

they were gonna get to be there with them. You're gonna, zero, zero, zero, rock was there too. Zero two was gonna be with Brett Michaels. And you like we were gonna get to be there with them. You were gonna zero zero zero Ock was zero to zero to was gonna be with Brett Michaels. Yeah, and you like we're gonna have a scene with Brett Michaels Yeah, and then you guys show up to film which if to show up fucking early because you have to be ready for them Right, so you show up ready for him and he's like I'm not gonna do the show Yeah, and he didn't do it But he's like you guys can film the show and he started his show show very, very late himself. And Lewis was with me that day, because Lewis loves poison.

It's first ever concert, Poison Pizza Party. He coming in with Aaron Berg on Wednesday. It's gonna be a lot of fun. And then we were me and Lewis, they were like, we stayed and watched. And I mean, when he came out, he came out and did look with the catch rag then. And I mean, all was forgiven really dude Lewis

I called his sister was a beautiful moment because I think she got him into that music when he was younger she's older than him and She would uh which one called me he held a big speaker phone like for her on the photo I was watching him have a good real emotional moment almost and look with the catch-rag didn't thumps that song rules and It was just loud in the small place, dude, to kill, yeah. The song rules. And he was great, so Amy point being, in fact, yes. He does put a fucking performance on. I guess until his diabetes acts up.

Or he just put those numbers. But he's out there, now she said he's incorporated into the show. So now he's like, rockin' and informative. He's good there now she said he's incorporated into the show so now he's like rockin and informative He's good at the law for hey Wilford Brimley suck his nuts This guy's rocking out and teaching about diabetes did like what's your McCaw it? On rock a love there's only flavor flavor named him right Brett Michaels wasn't like I'm gonna call you stinky pickles. Okay, you're Your your champ knuckle was it like I'm gonna call you stinky pickles. Okay, you're gonna.

You're your champ knuckle. Yeah. I could see it. I'm gonna call you Ferberger Jennifer. So long. Amy, thank you so much for the call. We got Tom on the line here. Tom, who's just wheeled deal and making balls. So glad you called in Tom.

Tommy rebounds. Tommy, you do it all right. Oh man, we're sit here thinking about you. Did you hear? Were you listening live? I'm sure I was listening live, day, every day. Okay, thank you. Good guy.

Tom's great. Yeah, it's mind-boggling to me. How many passes did you get, Tom? And please tell us that it's the funny answer. Tell us the ease with which you did it. I'm six passes, man. You did. You got six. You're taking all of us. You're taking us all. We're going to be Tom's guests. Oh my God.

What kind of inception fucked up shit do you have us doing, Sirius? Tom, how easy? I mean, without giving away maybe your secret plan, it was pretty straight up, right? Like, Yeah, there was a little work involved. I was ahead on the head of game. I was all over Rebound I'll tell you what this company can use a mid-range Tommy Tommy rebound and mid-range Tommy would play its way for this too We're not saying we're trying to get us to see Justin Bieber at the garden You know, I mean we're talking to guys to see Joan jet and Hershey P.A. I'm pretty sure the local radio stations just gave the tickets away.

Didn't even have a call. Mid-range Tommy, man. He could handle those kind of mid-range situations. Just to be clear, if you guys want to see the weekend in Philly this week, too, it's Thursday, night, come on down, move over to the whole group. Damn, dude. I wish I could. I can't, but the weekend's just sitting there waiting for us.

It's that easy for Tom. Everybody's working for the weekend. By the way, Tom's not press. He's ad sales at gas digital. He's taking care of business Jay TCBAD taking her business all day you can't argue with that Tom used to be a proud boy he got out of it when he realized it wasn't racist I'm excited for I'm excited for Jay and Tom's relationships who evolved to them selling like a Muscle

You guys are selling like really like you guys what you know what you really need to do after a workout is heal up and Tom And I have the perfect solution. Oh my god Jay and T's fiberglass. Yeah, dude. Oh, yeah Yeah, but just that one time for the pictures you know that's true We can always talk to those pictures throw a couple more veins and curves on my body and I'm unfortunately, it's not in the show. Yeah, but just that one time for the pictures. You know what I mean? I love that, true. We could always talk to those pictures, throw a couple more veins in curves on my body. And Christine, proficient at Photoshop, you're good. We're good, dude.

We start moving fucking J and T's way blast. Way, I gotta do it. They're like, do you ever talk to J anymore? I went honestly ever since all the muscle powders took off? No. Well, Tom, congratulations on being able to gain more access to concerts than serious XM satellite radio But in my entire life, he's got me to this point. I couldn't be more proud. Oh, yeah You know, be funny as if they found out they were like a yeah Howard says no one can broadcast from other

Concerts. It's like a Howard thing That'd be fucking good. It's like one of those weird rules. So they go, how it says no one can go to any, no concerts, outdoors or a lot of broadcast room. As funny, Tom's not going. He's coming to Vasket Ball, but I was gonna beg, Hey Tom, will you do a podcast from there that we can use for our Thursday show

and show how easy it would have been to do that? Little men on the street actually. Thank you for calling and Tommy. I'll see you later on the night buddy. At Legion of Skanks live from the stand and available on guestadjohnnetwork.com. Hey. Hey.

I mean, that's pretty insane, isn't it? I mean, I agree that's wild. Yeah. He was able to just told straight up Mel is wild, but it's also very funny. We have no access. No. It's not gonna happen.

Yeah. We should have said, we should have said, Hey, by the way, we got, I was gonna get my Zoom recorder. Yeah. Mine that I own. Yes. We were gonna do, we, I'm telling you, we may have just said like, can we go and we could have just done everything we need to do.

We just took the day off and done it. And got, we could have taken the day off and then back. And then it came back with two episodes somehow amazing we have two episodes two episodes two Thursday episodes very weird slap my tits and calm you wait for dinner mom mom got six the passenger window of his car doesn't roll down yeah six passes passes. Tom. I had to put smoke at the back window. Guy has a 15 foot. Guy has a 15 foot dude. Uncorks though. He's tall. We'll turn around pop shot. It's not bad. It's not bad at all. It's like our first break. We'll take our

first break. Big J going to be at the Brechtown Comedy Club in Oklahoma City. Please show up. I've never been there. There's new clubs. We were like It's a great club. I think I've heard great things because it's like it was just a tell that it's you and then two weeks I'm showing up. Oh hell yeah, they got like they're booking it fucking fun. I'll say this also because I have to I've never been there before so it'll be of course I always talk to the crowd But I'm gonna be doing a bunch of my jokes. I'm gonna do for my special. I gotta start getting them like ironed out. Yeah, for October, maybe. For fucking fun shows, man.

Yeah, Bricktown Comedy Club, Oklahoma City, July 14th through the 16th. And then the nasty show, it just for laughs. Jay's gonna be hosting it. So go get tickets and other tour dates are at bigjcomedy.com. Dan Soder, Tacoma Comedy Club. He's coming to you in Washington State State July 21st to the 23rd. After that he's gonna be in Oklahoma and Foe Enix, Foe Enix, Fenix, Oklahoma and Fenix got it. For tickets and other tour dates of course go to dancoder.com

Again the Pandora playlist of the week is Christine's rad redondo beach playlist. I've danced in Drum Circle Secondary. I know you have. I've watched it. But just settle down today without dancing in drum circles. She's singing things everybody. That's the playlist on Pandora. Search Bonfire SXM.

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