The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Father and Son

Episode Date: March 29, 2023

Talk about therapy turns into real therapy for a father and son.

I'm Bobby Kelly and it's Big J. Ocarson. We're actually a full radio show on Series XM. For full episodes of the Bonfire you can listen on... What is the SXM? Yeah, Series XM. You can say Series XM. Thank you very much. For full episodes of the Bonfire you can listen on the SMX app. No, say series XM. Serious XM! You can listen on the serious XM app. Go to seriesexm.com slash Bonfire for a special offer. And now, the Bonfire with Big J. O'Cerson and Robert Kelly. She's a dead-home.

She's eating the baby's start alone. You're right, Bobby. This was the right song. It is the right song. It just, right, Bobby. This was the right song. It is the right song. It just, right? Yeah. It gives you a hope. Some reason? It gives me lots of hope. It's the bonfire. The faction talks here at 6103 at Big Jeperson.

Robert Kelly, the whole crew in the house, doing their things they do. There are sort of things they do. We're all here. Jacob's looking frustrated with weather, black lose filming. I might have something to do with. There's scenes in a weird state of standing and sitting because of her back. And Lou on the ones and twos.

You may have upset Jacob. Not upset him. I might be a little caused for some of his stress. No, no. You had nothing to do with it. Okay. Alright, I'll call with that cause for some of his stress. Okay. Okay. All right. I'll cool with that What do you think of it? He was helping me sign into the Pentagon serious XM Database database. Yeah, there's a lot of stuff that goes into it. Oh, we're gonna see. I'm sorry

I think I interrupted you too because you didn't come with them a jacket nice start in your eyes. Yeah Yeah, it's awesome. Thanks, that's all. What's the company? This is called a clast fucking jacket company. It is a cool ass fucking jacket. Yeah. It's a, it's like the 80s.

Everyone sort of liked karate, but nobody did karate, right? Sure, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Everybody like dressing karate, but no one did karate.

It's like after it says Japan on the back. I don't know if I've ever told you this, but one of my finest moments in school, I left school, walked out and walked home as a young boy, several times for embarrassment situations. One of them, now these were self-inflicted. And the one my favorite was when I saw Patrick Swayze at the end of Roadhouse, if you recall the last third of the movie or so, or the last, what do you call the last stanza of the film. He's wearing a karate key tucked in as a shirt. No, please. And I did that with my Jewish, my Jewish community center karate, I tucked it into my G. First of all, tucked in wasn't my look already, but

in your, in my head, I was like, well, I look like Patrick Swayze, clearly. Yeah, but in wasn't my look already, but in my head I was like, well, I look like Patrick Swazie, clearly. Yeah, but it wasn't Japanese writing, it was Hebrew. And it was no writing on it at all, just a white deep, but what happened was as I moved around during the day and it becomes baggy or untucked, it looks like I'm giving you like a titshot. I felt like when everyone's trying to see J-Lo's tits with the dress, remember the famous dress? Yeah. It was like my cleavage. I remember it was as soon as it came apart at all. It was so it was already bad tucked in. I looked ridiculous, but I did try to rock that with no knowledge of karate whatsoever.

That's the things with movie they should tell you in the, you know, the credits that hey dude he did wear this but we taped it to him. It's tailored to him. You can never do this unless you have a movie crew behind you. It's not going to happen. So please don't try this at home kids. Hey guys, we noticed that you were really getting excited about Patrick's Ways. He's G-shirt. G-shirt.

Oh shit. Oh, I watched today. I wanted to tell you this. Wait a minute. Did you take karate at the Jewish Center? It's for very little. I just had the G-E. I also only did Hell Week of Football

and never played an actual game of high school football, but I had the pads. Always had the pads in my house. Never gave him back. I have a crack a jack uniform from when I was in the sea cadets. What are those things? What is that? Those real?

The sea cadets? Yeah, the sea cadets is the boy scout for the Navy. Oh, really? Yeah, or the coat is the coat's guy. She's got it by the water. So well, I mean, we all did. Didn't you know you're in the... Philly, Philly.

That's right by the water. The school the school school. Whatever the school. Dude. Yeah, I was a see kid at because I was getting into trouble. So she put me there was a kid up the street and it was the Navy. Food campus. It's yeah. Like I got a a crack a jack uniform. I got a wooden rifle. Wouldn't so they make you go through the motions. Do I have this kid took me to the park that I hung out at. Wouldn't rifle wouldn't so they make you go through the motions do that and all that stuff This kid took me to the park that I hung out at mm-hmm and with a with a I got a broomstick because I wasn't in yet

He had a wooden rifle and we did the military The drill to drills the the marching the Military salute with the thing at the park where used to be bad dude at the park where my friends were So here I am in the basketball court. Well, they're having fun Yeah smoking pot. They had a boom box playing some, you know some Nova And I'm I'm over there with a stupid broomstick Going it was it was humiliating. Oh, yeah, that's good. Humiliating. And I remember, I actually wanted to, I was in it for a minute, man. I kind of committed because I was like, listen, I'm getting in trouble.

And then finally, I just said, I'm out. I was in my cracker Jack uniform. And I met my friends in South Meffit. We called dominoes to somebody's house at the porch. And then when they showed up, we just took the pizza. And I was in my Navy outfit. So I remember back, I'd go around the back and get the money from my mom.

Oh, you looked so honest. I looked honest and I just ran. You just, you found you could use your good for bad. Yes, he got robbed by Popeye. Yeah. That's fantastic. I wanted to bring this up today because I think it was a fun thing to brainstorm on.

I watched the vice of vice documentary today on pedophile, I watched a lot of pedophile hunters. That's my jam. Yeah, I get it. And this vice was talking to the dads against predators, DAP, it's one of the famous predator hunter people. Yeah. And they, it really, what it shined more of a light on

than I find funny is you were saying the thing earlier this week about a, like the lady who was getting Jared. Yeah, sexy voice. Yeah, sexy voice in the phone. Sure. That you're almost like she should be arrested too because of being so like Involve of what he's saying. It's kind of entrapment. She's kind of squeezing it out of him. She's jerking it out of him Forget entrapment. I'm just saying more of like the play along of what you actually have to say and do is a band is what they're saying and the predator catchers

Like an adult has to sit there like his day is psyche It's all day. God. He's's like bidding he's gonna be like boy I don't know that sure would hurt my little boy butt but I just started to feel you inside of me and then go back to like anyways I was saying I think the meds have a good chance this year you gotta go back to life after being in this dark world of like type another person's going like, have you ever experienced semen on your body before? And it was like, I'm gonna say, guys, I'm sorry. No, that sounds a little scary. Does it taste salty?

Anyway, guys, I was thinking we can catch a movie then dinner or dinner then movie. You guys go. Ha, ha, ha. It's such a weird, and I was starting to think like, jobs where like, you have to do bad to get to like the good Like the good of what it does

I used to bring up on stage all the time that there's a person who works at a factory that has to make fuckable baby dolls for pedophiles So they don't actually do it. Sure and they have to like the quality control on that like some guy on the line He's got to put his finger in it and be like, feels real, I guess. This is good. Inspecited by 39. It's not big enough. It's not big enough. They're not kids on fucking kids.

This is a man fucking a kid. You call this a baby pussy? I mean, what the hell? You want me to stamp my father's company's name on this? And this is what you call a baby pussy? This is my wife's pussy. She had three kids. This is outrageous.

I'll just fuck my wife if I want to pussy this loose. Yeah, the belly button's too big. It's quality control and horrible things. Cause they're products. This asshole needs to be pink. It's not so much the person who has to design the newest and most efficient butt plug. It's the fact that someone all day long is just putting like someone's got to glue that jewel on the back of the butt on every butt plug.

Yeah, they have to hold the cot the put Spanish woman. That's just hold this monster deck and then put this jewel or just spring the shellac over the Veneey Black Rod. And you can never like take, like when you work at certain places, you can be like, go and take a couple home. Yeah, I'm good, I'm good.

Mm, not all right. I never even used a fleshlight. How many I got of those? I've used them, they're disgusting. Not only the disgusting, I just don't understand the, I don't get it. I've never had my cock in rubber like rubber toys before. It's not bad, it feels good, but here's the problem with it.

It's a terrible nightmare to clean. Yeah, it's the cleaning. It's the cleaning. Lube and come all over it, right? If they can fix that problem, if they can, remember that movie with Jack Black, we're invented poop be gone. If they can do that with jizz, like a little spray and then your jizz is gone. Yeah, you'll be the

guys will fuck everything. That's why there's no robot. There's no, there's no robot because you have to come in the robot and then clean it. And you know, you can't short it out. Yeah, it's like, you know, my robot will look like Han Solo in carbonite What if you're a heavy shooter? Oh, yeah, if you really lay a batch into a fleshlight It's apparently you could uh, no they all they do is add a screw on the bottom if there's a screw on the bottom There is I think on the flashlight. I don't think so. Yeah, is it absolutely? You could take the whole rubber thing out and put it in the dishwasher

Yeah, but it sounds like you're you're digging a real vagina out of a woman Yeah, cuz it's got your're digging a real vagina out of a woman. You know, yeah, because it's got your mic, it's got your stuggers going, it's the grossest. You got to break the suction on four sides. You got to break the seal, ripping an octopus off the side of a dinghy, it's disgusting. It's just too much. Like girls have it made.

You just put the thing in and then you spray it down with some stuff. Oh, yeah. And you could just really, you don't really have to put anything inside if you unless you're a real scuzz bucket. And you can't, I have a nine year old. I can't just leave it out on the counter like that. No.

My kid would drink and chocolate milk on it. Yeah. Well, I get, you know, it's funny, everybody always meant that's a big part of the complain of flesh, light is the cleanup. But my, I, is a kill the whole point of using it at all if you don't, do you have to cream pie it every time? Yeah. When I pull out.

Yeah, that's, you're not getting, you're not making a baby. You get to just complete without going, and then pulling out and shooting, it's the sucky part about sex for us, is that we're petrified. Women get to orgasm and just let it go, because nothing's sure none of them, right? We have to usually time it to where we're gonna hold it

and then pull it out It put it somewhere how's that go Oh, it's a match. What's heavy? That's a heavy one. That's how my god. Oh my god Ladies Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God.

Oh my God. So. So. So yeah, dude, if you don't, if you, when we're going to come now, imagine the flesh side's great because in theory, we get to keep going and come inside. We don't have to stop. We don't have to hold a breath. We don't have to pull out.

You just get to keep going. But now you keep going, and then you have this nightmare of a mess to clean up on the bottom of this thing. Yeah, just rubber, yeah, it sounds gross, but I will say, this might be the surprise, why I say that, like, why I cream pie it every time. I don't think I prefer coming inside anyway. It's never been my, I like to pull it out, see where it goes, see what happens.

Tell me test my age. Have you, I'm gonna test your age. Leave it in, see what happens. I mean, you test your age, you see if those fucking gizz make it to Christine's eggs. No, not with the amount of weed that we both smoke. You just got lazy eggs and gizz. They just meet up in the front of her pussy and watch her move together.

Ha, ha, ha. They go, the sperm and her eggs just hang out together. They order Taco Bell at midnight. So, so. Hey man, you want to do this now? I don't want to do this. You want to get in here to this? Nah.

Hey man, I'm just going to fall off. I'm going to fall off in a couple of days and into a cup and she's going to drain into her. I'm going to throw up. I can't get that. I want to notice the seasoning of like, of the pussy. No, of myself, of just like not knowing or not really over giving a shit about coming inside.

It's never been my like, like, damn, can't come inside because, you know, I mean, I don't want to get it just more pregnant or whatever. Even with like a condom on, I'd rather pull out and take the condom off and fire away. I love coming in of a genre. Really? I mean, what people do. Look at Jacob, he gave you a gift.

Yeah, right? I mean, you push him. You get your nod like you were talking about policies He likes I love I Love and then that last thing when you put you both push together when she you go I'm coming and you and she feels it and she pushes in and she grabs you and you grab her and you You put your face in her neck Right sure and you can feel you can just, and you put your face in her neck, right?

Sure. And you can feel, you can feel her balls on your balls. You feel them squint your move. Yeah. He's dead. Oh, that's such a good deep feeling. The ball squint your up. Yeah, they just go, they knock together.

I hate jizz, Jay. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate my jizz. I hate, it's a night. I don't like spills. I told you, I don't hate jizz Jay. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate my jizz. I hate it. It's a night. I don't like spills. I told you I don't like jizz. When I jizz, I get all fuck. I've created a thing now where I'm going to jizz on stuff. I can't even enjoy it anymore. Yeah. I don't I hate it. Yeah, I don't yeah, especially I wish I could not come when jerking off. It's such a waste of a problem, you know, like that is unnecessary. Yeah. When I was done jerking

off, there was just nothing there and I can go back to life instead of having to like find out it's on my shirt or in my bush or wherever the fuck it's going. Yeah, you think you got it all then you stand up and you feel it go down like in your butt, like in your crack. The worst is if you do a day jerk in a hotel, and you say when you get in a hotel, as you go right away, for a blast. First thing.

When you, depending on your, if I'm doing a daytime jerk, I'm not doing a crazy cleanup, like I'm going to church afterwards or something, I just kind of get what I think is the surface of it. Sure. And go back to live in life. Yeah.

And then have you gotten that feeling where your dry like dick hold gizz sticks to your underwear, on the wear moves, you feel like that little rip of the, yeah, have you ever peed in 19 different directions? Oh yeah, that's terrible. I hate that. It's all over the place. Yeah, but have you ever you know, you know, you know, I do when that happens when I'm peeing in two different directions. Yeah, I push hard and you get to watch the streams come together. Like Ghostbusters. Like Ghostbusters. The streams we cross the stream. That's the best seeing that Jizz residue get knocked out of your dick hole and this piss goes With your combino. I've never had a crazy rogue but up up up

I'm coming I'm coming I would love if my if that was what Giz sounded like. If Giz... Buzzer. Ho! Hiho! Oh! I'm gonna kill that towel. If it made a noise, it makes... That's the other thing.

It just makes no noise. Like I wish it made a noise. Like if you know, I'm coming and... And maybe the most humiliating thing that I will say about external com shots coming on a lady's body is that the afterwards. It's the afterwards also of like wiping your come off of a person is really a funny thing A little there and look at that. So I'm gonna there I feel I feel like what's the word I'm looking for

like a like a royal Like I'm like let me you have a little here come wiper. Yeah, like I'm taking care of her, you know what I mean? And you know, like it's like shivu. Yeah. It is shivu, right? Yeah, shivu. Yeah, shivu. But was someone just laying there and going back and you got to go, yeah, okay.

Oh, something there. Sorry about that. Oh, there's a little here, I want every, and then you got to make some type of small talk joke. Oh my god, I'm, look at how much over here. Yeah. Oh god. Well, hello, I must have look at how much over here. I'm here. Oh God. Well, hello, I must have had a great time.

And then they go, all right, I got it, I'm good. You're like, all right, back off. Just trying to help. You're slut. Yeah, also like the wiping, if they wipe it off. Oh, I feel bad. If they're wiping it off though, I would say, in my mind, it would probably go to like, like, oh, they hate it. it like they hate that it's on them. They can't wait to get it off. Yeah

Look I feel bad when I I don't like coming when they like come on my face. I'm like I don't want to like I will but I don't I don't want to okay. I don't want to hurt your eye My my gizz stings. I know it stings a little, because the food I eat, you know what I mean? Yeah, Christine's definitely had a blood shut eye from come before it, it does look weird. Yeah, I didn't mean to injure you. Yeah, blood sugar, are you allergic? Yeah, dude, that red gizz eye makes me feel bad.

And they pretend it doesn't hurt, but you know what hurts? It's Christine's tiny little eyelashes. Yeah, her little Indian cigar lashes. It's supposed my face with come, and I can just keep my eyes open like this. We'll never get there. It's like awnings. You have Venus slide traps. I got little come awnings.

You do whatever you want to my face. Slide right off like rain ex. If you come on my forehead, it runs out my forehead and shoots back out of you. My little come onings. I hate it. I don't like doing it in a girl's face. I'd rather do it on your chest or your shoulder. Like on one nut, yes, you are. I want to do it on your tits.

Okay. I got a nice little area you can run. Definitely take the run down. We should do that one day. Just come in each other and see you. We'll see you as quicker. He gets the belly button. Yeah, we race, race, jizz to the belly button.

Japan, if you're listening, new game show. Guy comes in a girl's neck right here. Where they have the lack of items, Apple. It's got to be something that's going to be a lot of things. Jizz to the belly button. Japan, if you're listening, new game show. God comes under girls neck right here, where they have the lack of Adam's apple. It's gotta be, sorry, it's gotta be born women. It's gonna be a lot of gays. God damn it. You gotta come in the thing,

and then they have to stand up and try to like maneuver their body to see if they can get it in the belly button. Yeah, I like that. I love that idea. And whoever gets it in the belly button. Yeah, I like that. I love that idea. And whoever gets it, the belly button wins. Yeah. Hey, people at home, just so we have some tests, things going on. If you want to send a video of you coming on your significant

other and then her trying to know hands, body move it down the her belly button. But it has to be the original nugget. Yeah. Or can it be like electric, like lightning nugget? Can it be other, like the first? Absolutely, no, no, no. It can be any part of the,

if you can finagle, G is getting from your neck. Down to your belly button. Down to your, you get it from your face to your belly button. I'm prepared to make your third microphone or the shi- Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, I'm paired off of you in full costume, right? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha but what a load. I might be able to do it. You think so? Yeah, because my giz for some reason, soupy?

It's not soupy. It has little, sorry. I didn't even put that out in the world. That is not a flattering thing to call. You ready for my soupy load? My mind has like a little yellow gelatin. Really? Yeah, I don't know what that is.

When you first got your surgery, it was coming like motor oil. Dude, remember that? Do you remember that? Yeah. That scared first got your surgery it was coming like motor oil. Dude. Remember that? Do you remember that? Yeah. That scared the shit out of it. I've never looked at another man's come in a picture and and was jolted by the color. So he's been like, oh dude come. My dude, I was I got the surgery and I went to JFL and we were up there and I didn't tell anybody but I was jerking off because my friend. Yeah, we had to make us feel terrible, by the way. He didn't tell anyone he had the surgery.

He just, but he did come over to tell us his dick is shooting out brown and what should he do about that? I'm like, well, it seems pretty out of nowhere. So the doctor? Yeah, my dick had a demon in it. It was just shooting out black jizz. And I was panicking. I thought, I thought,

because I think the first thing is cancer. Like I thought they cut me open a really least cancer into my body. Oh, it's hilarious. I thought it was mine. And you thought maybe you were shooting the cancer out? I don't know. The first thing in black jizz is cancer.

And then it's something. Really? Yeah. It's cancer. And then something else, it was some other thing what you're asshole. Uh huh. That fucking is broken. I brought to you something, I'll make. Yeah, something. It's cancer and then something else it was some other thing what your asshole That fucking something will make yeah, something yeah, it was bad. It was freaky. It was a lot

It was all black too like it was you would think yeah, the doctor would say You know this might happen Not sending home with that well it, it's not a knowledge. Well, I was in another country with black kids, which is scarier. You know, it's a country with free health care. Yeah, but you get to wait six months. You're not wrong. You're going to be 700th in line with that problem.

Everybody else has ax wounds and broken legs were running on logs or something. But I would definitely think a doctor should say, hey, you might have brown jizz for a while. Well, it was because of the, I was, I had so much protein. Protein, if you drink, I was drinking all protein and it made my jizz black. So there you go. That's what it was. I, it was like fourth on the list or something.

That's a weird amount of things and come out and jizz. Yeah, but it was blood. Yeah, blood. That's nuts. Protein black. And, but it was blood. Yeah, blood. That's nuts. Protein, black. And it was weird. If I jizzed blood, I would one assume

that I was like stick modder or something. Yeah. But the Lord is something doing something terrible to me. Possessed blood coming out of your dick. What causes that, Christine? Look at that. Christine, if you wouldn't mind, blood coming out of the dick hole, if you wouldn't, if you'd be so kind. Blood coming out of the dick hole, isn't that like,

isn't that cancer? Christine, swing it up there if you have a second. You used to do what your fingers, you don't have to with your back. You don't have to physically lift it onto that screen. You could just like, you know, shoot it over there with technology. Tell you what, should you gonna make blood come out of

your dick hole? You could put it up on that. I got it. Zero thanks man. That's her. You're an airy track, I can't speak. You gotta make it much bigger, yeah.

There you go, thanks. So you tilted a little bit too? Low infectious disease test. Common cause of blood and cementing and infection. Terrible, what a shitty name. UTI sexually transmitted. Oh, God. Trans-erethral resection of the prostate.

Assist. What is it? In large proxies. Cisoscopy. Or of a sectomy. Oh. Oh. Have you ever come blood, Lou? Never.

I feel like if anybody did. I'm not going to go around the rest of the room. You know, Jacob never come blood. Jacob, you never come blood. He comes cotton candy. Oh, I bet. Oh, I bet Jacob's come is so beautiful. That's like troll hair.

It's nice. I bet it is nice. I bet every rope, the same consistency of white, thick. Yeah. Sometimes I'll do the, remember I announced on the show what Tommy Lee discovered what the secret having a giant load is. What's that?

Celery juice. Yeah. Oh yeah, yeah. See that's what you do. If you want to impress, if that's impressive to anyone, you just, you know, you eat a bunch of celery stalks or blend it. Mm, that day.

Or just daily. It's the day before. The day before. So you can do it the day before and have a big load. Mmm, yeah. I think black loose jazz would be interesting too. I bet it would be, I bet his jazz is pink. Maybe.

Like, like, hubba-bubba. It's flashy. Yeah. I, um, yeah, I want to see a Jacob load so bad now. I don't want to coax it out. To do it. I was green. Just laid on a piece of paper for us or something.

Construction paper so we can see the different color. Celery or non-celery? No, he's celery. Celery and I want to know the piece of leather, like classic. I want to get a nice piece of leather, put it down on it. Tell them you're thinking about buying a couch, get a swatch of leather. A swatch of leather, but like a light brown.

Don't go too crazy, I don't want to see it. No, not a espresso. Yeah, not a espresso. Maybe a milk chocolate. Yeah. Milk chocolate. Yeah, I want to see the thing, but you don't want it to be like, if you make the background too dark,

then you're over selling the whiteness of it. See if they can stitch a camel color. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. See if they can stitch a J. Just a nice stitch. You're loading pad.

Yeah, loading pad. That's where you jizz. It's like a professional jizz pad from England. Oh, that is imported. It's a jizz pad. I love people don't know that. It looks like a leather swatch. Yeah. It's a chase pack. I love you. I know that Looks like a leather swatch. Yeah, you would do you yeah, yeah, that would look like that to you actually You get it so it rolls up and it has a leather tie so you can take it through the You go with the hooky like excuse me. You just take it out roll it down

And you jizz it on that and then you hand it to it. My damn I bet Jacob as the ones when it happens. It goes like, it just, it fires straight out. Well, I don't think it falls down. Baby snake. Yeah. Damn, so impressed with Jacob's fictitious load in my mind. I bet it.

Jacob, I'm so impressed with your load. All your real load can do is disappoint at this point. I'm gonna look at that leather swatch you had imported and be like oh that's fine. That's a regular round load. That's celery? Okay. All right. I'm not gonna make it a weird thing. Totally cool. Is this what you talked about in therapy today? No, it's not. You get emotional. Yeah dude. I might have to switch therapy to like Wednesday. Well, I can't, I don't know if I can do a come right in double show day. He got me a couple hours to think about it. He got me today, bro. Family stuff. Dad stuff.

Oh, can you play that cast even songs? No, no, no, no, no, no. You don't have to cry again. A lot of us have concerns about our children. I would want to see Bobby cry. It was as an emotic to see that you're in touch with your emotions. It's well. And I remember Alan when I went to him a couple of times, the first time I went, I cried, and I made the joke in there.

I go, did I cry, did I cry faster or slower than robber kelly and he goes i won't talk about that you can associate with jokes and i mean you just stay serious it i won't speak about that well the first time i was in there i go he said something i go this is not making me into a fucking queer and he goes you already are you're here there's real men don't go to therapy i find that very

bizarre don't know that i could do it look I find that very bizarre. I don't know that I could do it. It looked like everyone seems to have the same therapist. I think it's crazy. Well, I think because he might be getting 10 different versions of the same event. Yeah. I did come out. Here's a problem is that I came out and there was another comic coming in that I know.

So I usually shut down whatever. came out and there was another comic coming in that I know. Yeah. So I usually shut down whatever he got to me, he got to me towards the end too, which was nuts. He, uh, everything was going great. Yeah. And then? Well, I was talking about how grateful I am right now, however, but it all started out.

All my grateful stuff. I'm very grateful for my family. Like I, I really love that I have a great family and that, and I really love my son. Yeah, and it's great kid. But, you know, the fact that he's healthy. He's healthy, he's smart, he's funny, he's loving, he's considerate.

And a personality. But he's got a he's loving, he's considerate. He had a personality. But he's got a dad. Mm-hmm. And I'm a good dad. Yeah. And you didn't have a good dad. I didn't have. And I don't understand how much I love my kid.

Mm. Until. I love him so much. and I don't understand why somebody couldn't love me. I don't get that. I don't understand how a guy could not want to be around me. Like what did I do that you? If you think back though if you think back there might be answers. I did this as an adult myself. I'd be like why was my daddy would it be so not around my life? I was such a great kid.

And then you're like, oh, remember you freaked out at Disney World? Made everybody leave early. Remember how you were too fat to play sports to make him proud? Remember how you wanted to watch the Eagles play football? And you wanted to watch Boy George and said he was pretty. Yeah, but Jay, I wasn't a fucking... I wasn't a side queer. I was actually a good kid. Oh, yeah, I was really different I was cool. My nickname was spiff. You know, I mean I used to hang out my uncles and the crack beers with them. I was a mascot at the softball game. You know,

I mean, yeah, I was good kid. Yeah, I was a really cool kid. Oh my dad Didn't want to spend time me because he just started a different family There was two kids there look just like me Yeah, it just it does it did blow my mind. I just I'm so happy that I have the kid in my life Yeah, and I'm so happy. He has a dad that Gives a shit about him so much. You know what I mean? Yeah, because I I don't know I I miss him every day I think about him all the time I love hanging with him now, you know hang having I don't you had a girl

Yeah, I don't know how it is with a girl, but having a boy son just having a son like I can say to him Hey, let's go take a ride Let's go. We just turn on old 80s, 90s rock. And I see him tapping out the window, saying, and then we'll stop somewhere. We'll go in, we'll look around a store, a stupid store. I remember I was in Belgium with him. We just went into some stupid Belgium museum.

We didn't understand any of it. But we just laughed and he ran away. He hit in the box. I didn't know where he was. He's not supposed to be in it. He was like a piece of art. And he's just in it. And I'm like, what are you doing? You fucking nut. I know where he was. He's not supposed to be in it was like a piece of art And he's just in it. I'm like, what are you doing you fucking nut? Love him so much. Very well. I'm King Tut. I'm King Tut. Get the fuck out of that King Tut tomb

And then then we felt like we fell asleep on a bench in front of a castle You know what I mean? Like he fell asleep on my lap and then I remember I came back who was I think it was Lewis was like I told them that story and he's like, dude, you got to take him to Disneyland. I'm like, what? I was at a real castle you fucking moron in Belgium. I'm a little afraid. How many years ago was that? Cause now Lewis is definitely, he go to Belgium

and tell you that his idea was to go to Belgium. It was a couple of years ago, three years ago. Yeah. Do you really follow the Bobby thing for sure? You had Aruba, he made Aruba Puerto Rico and then Jamaica. Yeah, you really follows the Bobby thing for sure you had a Ruba. He made a Ruba Puerto Rico and then Jamaica. It's always got to be a regular place to go to you start a podcast network He starts to podcast network You love your kid. He decides to love his kid No, but now Lewis is like the vacations are like Italy and things like that. Yeah, sure

He likes watches now is in the watches. He's in the watches. He's Italy and things like that. Yeah, sure. He likes watches now. He's into watches. He's in the watches. He's going to get a Rolex soon. He's getting a Rolex. What he tried to do was the funny. I love like Lewis, uh, like inflicting whatever his thing is on everyone else. Yeah.

Like his fat interests will be not fat, fat, uh, interests. I heard fat. Did you? Yeah. You did too. You said it. You heard why I said it. Yeah. His fat interests become part of your like there's somehow in your world all of a sudden. I can't get the song out of my head. Well, it's not your fault. Shut up. Stop. I got a shot at the rough. I keepupereity Me and Max sleeping on a bench in Belgium Why did nobody love me the way that I love my boy? I needed someone to pat my head where were you? Nobody taught me how to throw a ball I had five or six father figures Nobody taught me how to throw a ball.

I had five or six father figures. None of them took care of me as long as I wanted them around. Now I listen to exclusively girl rock. Kelly Clarkson is my favorite, because my dad never took the time to call me fat Your dad song is my favorite song. What is that song? I really Make sense now The whole Kelly Clark Clarkson makes sense. Oh my God.

I love girls who rock. No, it doesn't invite it. He not stick around. You like girls who rock because they didn't have fathers either probably. Yeah. Even if people just stuck around him a little less to you at least do what a show he cared about something. You know what I mean?

Funny. Yeah, Max doesn't cry either. That's the thing. Like I watch the good doctor, I'm done. Like I cry at everything. He'll look at me like that. Like I'm kind of afraid. I really, Isabella is not a hyper emotional kid either.

It's so funny I'd like, I have to see the emotion behind what she's actually saying. And that was the funny. And the car was the funniest when she said, she goes, for the first time ever in 20 years, she goes, Daddy, you ever gonna like try to quit smoking or something? Like she said like that. You're gonna try to quit smoking or something

and I was like, you're so worried about your papa. You don't want me to go anywhere that you want me to be okay. She's like, okay. She's like, I was just asking. No, it is cool. Having a daughter is great in so many ways to the worries are different for sure, but at 20 years old or 21, she's gonna be soon.

It's kind of cool having an adult that I do. That same thing I can go with his bell and just be like, let's go dick around the day and do whatever. Yeah, I can't, I love it. be like, let's go dick around the day and do it over. Right, yeah. I can't, I love it. It's great. It's nice.

She was at Skankfest. Yeah, but you will, what is funny about these moments and the crying and stuff like that, is just like getting mad at like this, you know what I mean? Like, shut the fuck up Max! Please! Stop singing that song over and over again, you know. He's like, what ever dad, you know,

no, no, what ever dad! I'm telling you to do something to it's your time. Chaffo's. Yeah, it is fucking. I don't know. I think I'm bored because his dad loves him. Yeah, he can tell you good loved. Yeah, not the rest of us. Black Lou had to fight his own father to fist fight his own dad.

Did you fight your own dad? Absolutely. Really? An entire story you just told had me tearing up. Oh, bbup. I don't go to therapy, but I feel exactly the same way you do. It sucks, right? It sucks.

Like, you're a great person. I know you, I know you, and you're such a sweet human being. We turned it around. The fact that I love a J's life, we're all just shithead keep it deserved. We deserve it. I love that he's given all the dads an out like now Bobby you're a piece of shit. It's too sensitive. It wants to be around you. Yeah. Oh, your dad probably wanted to hang out with dudes. Sometimes when I come to the studio early Jacob's talking to his dad and they just love each other so much it really is to me.

I want you to do something in the phone right now. Take my number and put dad Kelly. Next time that happens, you call me. All right. I'm gonna say father things to you. I'm gonna do this, ready? He pretend like you call me right now. Go ahead, call me.

Hey, Bobby. Hey, what's up son, how you doing, pal? Hang it in there, hang it in there. When I don't have to play catch with Hendrix today, it was awesome. Ah, I love it. I want to come over soon. What are you doing this weekend? We should get together. Yeah man, we should play catch. I've actually never done that before.

Hey, you know what we should do this weekend? We'll go to the park, we'll get the gloves. I'll make some of those sandwiches you like. Yeah? The PBJ with the banana Coming up top PBJ banana You ever know my hoagie gun and we'll play a little play a little basketball, huh? Sounds good to me. Okay, I'll make a ratio. I'm

Well do that we'll barbecue in the park fillet you people like Sorry, little I I didn't know I Took a good barber shop I don't know what do you want to do? I was thinking of putting those those little shocks in the back of your car We can really make it a nice up and down you know what I mean? I'm gonna go rimshopping with your top on the sweet. Hey, you want to go still change out of the niggas cars? lose that He loved him as much as he loved

Vermin that he would have to catch his dad was a good exterminator really I used to put us in the back with the vermin So you need to ride to school with a bunch of furious raccoons They don't want to get out as loose drive He's like shaking on the fence cuz they want out Hey pop is this skunk an a spray me because now you don't piss them off son Not if you don't piss them off your state now if you don't piss them off, you're a stale young, that's your fault. Hand me one of those slits, would ya?

Throw it over my shoulder, you call that a throw nitty? Did you take a sip before you gave it to me? There you go, that's good. There is, put some hair on your nuts. You made him drop you off like a block from school, right? Couple blocks from school, but it's still, he's hugely embarrassing. Yeah, everybody do the scratches on your face. Little cross scratches all over you. Was it a little square truck with like the cages in the back? That's right, a white square metal truck. Oh man, that's terrible. What did say on the side?

B&D pest control. His own startup business where on the side, he made it like with stencils, like the sign. It wasn't professionally done. So first of all, a startup business is a great thing to do. He goes, I'm gonna buy a few traps and just get the word out there. He's got a word of mouth. Yeah.

The logo's not straight. It kind of goes down to the back. Yes. Wow. And I'm gonna take this bow constrictor out of your attic. Tell your friends, by the way, I'm all word of mouth. He only named it B&D because he didn't have enough letters to make it. He named it the full company name.

What do you want to call it? Well, letters you got. I got B&D. I'm just not gonna write the whole thing out. He got one stencil. He was like, this sucks. Oh, so spray paint. So yeah, it was a homemade job. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. And he just, yeah, what a weird job to have. Did you go with him? Did you have to go like cockroach hunting? No, we left that all to him. We just We got to see what he brought back really. He brought it back. Yeah, and then he dropped us off from school and then dropped the Vermanov

Wherever the fuck they go. By the way, when he described it. It was opposite. I'll tell you where they go You would drop the vermin off and I take my little buddies over to the yeah You know what the vermin went to the next customer Those those vermin were handed down generation a generation You have a grave. He just like throwing possums and people's like backyards So you can like oh looks you got a problem miss exact I didn't We were making put a blanket over the possums. They were too hard to look at. We were you for teeth. Did they ever show you love? When he was drunky would

Really yeah, what kind of love you know what kind tough He would tell us love this when he was shit face drunk it Put him a song. Blue put the song on before you say this Yeah, put the song on we kept describing himself right now. Lou when he when he got drunk what happened He would then he would be nice to us and Come up to each one of us and tell us we he loved us as we were asleep. Lou get in here bring your sister Come on. We sit out. Just bring your sister and your twin brother in here. All right listen he goes I love you all Him the most her second and then you yeah, love doesn't count if you drunk dad Are you yelling? I'm a locky at all counts. Oh, come on me. Let me give you a nougat your cocksucker with you sober

Why do I care that you love me when you drunk? Are we doing role play? I'll be your dad. No, I'm talking to you. I don't like your hats. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I asked it makes me feel gay when I see you Cuz I love that ass, but only on your mother We should all go to Alan when that is just recorded now go out there and clean up the Ann Eater cage I got an Ann Eater Go out and get the jaguar to the cage put him in the back She told me it was other animals. So it's not cool. Oh, there's a zebra back there Cockatoo. Did you have a pet growing up? We had a couple dogs that disappeared.

Jack is what? Yeah, well, they ran away, but they didn't run away. You think you killed them? I think you left them in a field with the fucking raccoons and the How do you think you got control? How do you think that the raccoons out of the hole kind of that dog meat. Yeah. You lost several dogs just weren't there one day. They said it ran away and it's never coming back but we knew. Well, if they say it's never coming back, they've done something. They've done something. Yeah. Damn. Yeah. That sucks though. Were they sick? Oh, my parents. The dogs. No, they just were incorrigible. We couldn't train them so we got rid of them. Wow.

Oh, gosh. Did you give it a shot? What kind of jog? Dog? Like was it a big like a wilder? Yeah, like a big mud cross between a big old and a, you know, just a mix T-rex. A big kind of dog. Hey dog, get out there in the woods. You were bred for forest survival. And you had a father that was fantastic.

Yeah, he was a good dad. Yeah. Did you take walks with you? I was busy a lot. My dad was working on stop, but you know, he was always there. He loves me every day. What was your, what was the thing you remember the most? Like the great, one of the greatest memories as a kid.

Your bar mitzvah? No. Oh, no. Okay. That was a horror I'm sure it was far I remember I'll tell you one I can remember I don't remember good times because I never had a dad like that But I remember when did your biological dad split? I know he split before I was born he went to be he was a Vietnam He had my sister here went to Vietnam What had me he had me when I was over he just went to Vietnam. He had me when I was over.

The war was over. He just went to Vietnam. He's like, you know what? I'm out of here. Oh, yeah. It was 1985. I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. He went to Vietnam while I was born. My mother lived and I don't know the full story. Here's a problem. I think my mom wanted me not to like him. Me and my dad became friends again when I got sober. When I got sober, I called him up and made an amends to him because we had falling out and stuff. And I remember when I lived with the abusive father that used to hit me, I call, I was like, I'm going to live with my

dad and my mom was so mean. She goes, oh, yeah, go ahead because she knew there's no way So he called his son wants to talk to you and he gave me the phone. I go dad I want to come live with you and he's like, yeah, no I was like on the phone like huh? I thought it was gonna be like a movie like oh you you know, but it was like yeah Not happened. I was like and I just had it like hang up the phone and run into a Roman cry My dad said yes to that very same thing, but he did not want it at all. And it just went haywire in six months. I was back home. Really? Yeah.

Yeah. I changed schools in the middle of the year and everything. Oh, that's worse. Yeah, I went up to start school year in Ohio. And then I was there. My stepmother just hated me. Just hated having me around. Again, though, these are the things as you become older, you go like, she got plenty of reason.

You know what I mean? Like I was definitely like, her personality is her personality. And I took things very personally that are hilarious, turns out that she did, my brother is over there also. Cause like, little fact, if you didn't hide the snacks for me, I was fine the snacks and I was eating them, but she hid them away like in a locked cabinet. And I was like, all right, lady, that's a little over the top. And then turns out she just did it for her own children also. She just that kind of

person. She's just like, oh God. Pat locked snacks away. That sucks. But I mean, I remember, I left my boom box on her basement steps one time and came home and found that she like, ate shit with laundry, like stepped on the boom box And went down the stairs and I thought that was hilarious I did have a a local girl getting naked in front of her babies When they were running around. Yeah, that's not good. No, I didn't I didn't do great stuff. Yeah Again, I can but also at 11 years old though. She was already like she just didn't like that. I like She has to deal with someone else's thing. Well, I was terrible at 11. I was

Going rogue too. Yeah, but my me and my dad though We didn't he can't he never really knew me, but he came back from Vietnam I don't know something happened with him my mom. I don't know the real story But I think my mom started seeing I don't know maybe seeing somebody else and I think my mom started seeing, I don't know, maybe seeing somebody else, and he came back, and he was a little fucked up on drugs. A lot of those guys came back, she fucked up.

And that was it. So I think he just called the quits and he met somebody else, had another life, had another kid. But we hooked up when I got sober and became friends again, and we were hanging out. I mean, my dad gave me the,

some of the greatest advice I ever got, relationship advice ever. I had a girl that wanted me to piss on her. She was really, I want you to pee on me and I was like, I don't know, like, my dad called and I go, hey dude, can I ask you a question? He said, what's up? I go, this girl wants me to piss on her.

What do I do? And he's like, I finally come back in your life and this is the first question he asked me. He goes, he goes, well listen, I wouldn't drink a gallon of water and muster up a piss, but I had to go and show a piss on her

if that's what she wants. I was like, that's why you need a dad. That's what a dad is good for those little decisions. We like, don't do that. We do this. Don't get too deep in that dark world, but take a piss on the girl. If you have to, don't muster it up up you have weirdo, but if you got a piss

Don't pound water take a piss, but if you got a piss I mean that's a great father and I was like that Thanks dad like I got that out of him. You know, I can pass that on the max someday Man telling a girl hopefully some girl was a hard thing to To pass on to a son is the idea of Turning a girl. I don't try to think of something. I've turned a girl like I'm into this and I'd be like I won't even try that my gotta be something No one's ever really asked to like fuck my ass with anything. I had that You had it. I had a girl which she she She asked you mean she's like I want to fuck you

And I was like okay, and she said no, I don't know if you know I want to get a strap on and fuck you in the ass. I went oh no, I got you the first time I said yes I don't you know all this chitchat's gonna cut away from the fucking my ass time Are we gonna squawk squawk squawk over there, we're gonna get the fucking. Oh, I heard you. You already been it over. I don't heard you now. Get to it.

But then she's like, all right, we'll give me the money. I'll go get one. I'm like, I'm not paying, I'll go havesy. I didn't have money at the time too. It's like when I was back in Boston. It's all so you don't pay. You're a handsome man. You don't pay to have your ass fucked.

You come with the equipment. You want to fuck your ass fucked. I'll come with the equipment and you want to fuck my ass bitch. I'm not paying full price on an abortion with you. You never find a dildo. And then she's like, well, I'm picking it. I'm like, you're wrong again.

I'm not, I don't want the dick you want. I would, you got to have my dick or a lower. Oh, see, I would say you could pick the dick, but you're not going to pick the amount I take. Yeah, but dude, come here with a two footer if you want, but I'm telling you only a few inches are going in. Yeah, it's going to be an unsatisfying visual for you when you find out that I am very shallow

back there. I'm pretty sure, and this might be a fact, I'm pretty sure that in your asshole, your dick will fit. Like you can be... Perfectly. Yeah, I think that's a fact. I think that's your asshole is made for your dick. Like if you took your dick and put it in your asshole, it would fit automatically. I wish I could plug it in like a...

Like I'm putting a gas... Like I'm putting a gas pump away. Have you ever tried to mush it? Plug it into myself the end of the night, so there's no leakage. Have you ever tried to mush the head of your dick into your asshole? It's never gotten anywhere close to reaching my asshole. My asshole's too far from where my dick's gonna hit. Got a lot of ball.

I've definitely, I would say what I've enjoyed more as I'm older is whacking off in a hotel. Legs pretty wide on a warm day and feeling as I jerk my balls banging into my asshole. Huh? Don't mind that at all. Yeah. Don't have a problem with that. I like getting fully naked in a bed now too. Like I'm like masturbating fully naked. No, not me. I like it. I still have to see myself. I like it. I like my, my, your knees are up, right? Your knees are up. Yeah, I'll go knees. Yeah, not even knees up. And you're on your stomach, right?

I do more of like a butterfly thing. What? It's probably a, it's sort of like this. Oh, yeah. Like I'm going this. And pound them. I do, I do more. Could be a beautiful butterfly.

I do this. I'll do this. But your feet are planted more. My feet are planted. And you're're oh, okay. Oh, yeah No, I give a little I touch my toe tees at the bottom like that Yeah, and then I have nice diamond and I have a little area to work with I like the diamond. I like that. That's nice. It's not bad Yeah, it's nice

It's comfortable. It's not bad. It is a position. No, you have to commit you have to go Underwear around the ankles though. You can't you're stretching your underwear. It's not bad. It is a position, though, where you have to commit, you have to go underwear around the ankles, though. You can't, you're stretching your underwear. It's fighting you too much over here. Yeah, I like that. I like that. I like the underwear on the ankles once in a while, but I feel like if something happens. I don't like getting naked to jerk off because then unless I'm going to go right to sleep,

because if not, like, like, like, re-getting dry getting up and flipping over one There's always a little extra batch in there. There's always an extra squeeze that you forgot for some reason And then when my crumple my fat body up to get off the bed That's what's gonna happen is gonna stick to the under you know, I mean I take everything off because when I leave the underwear around my ankles and I have to pull them back up I feel like a slut. I feel like I feel like Horish Like I'm I feel like the you know like When I leave I just so I pull them up fast and like my like my hoodie is tucked into my shorts or my underwear

I was just trying to quickly pull them up. Yeah I do it. I take them all off and then I fall asleep in the bed and whatever is in the bed is in the bed. I don't know because it's white. Oh, you know, just to... Agreed. To show you how... Because I think I'm with you about jerking off in a hotel room, something special about it, but just to reiterate how shitty the plaza was, I thought, like, I didn't jerk off.

My giz was like too too classy for that shit hole room. I agree. You didn't jerk off in the pliz was like too, too classy for that shit hole room. I agree. You didn't jerk off in the plaza? Really? Disgusting. Did you bring your, did you bring your, he's wearing his com would clean the place up too much

and not have it as a complaints matter? But did you bring your 1876 leather giz collector with you? Not at the time. No, see that's the problem. You can bring that with you, you can giz anywhere. Christine, can we find a thing where we could maybe pick a leather swatch from? I'm sure there's Amazon, can order's the problem. You can bring that with you can just anywhere. Christine, can we find a thing where we could maybe pick a leather swatch from? I'm sure there's Amazon's get older or less swatch.

I have leather people follow me. Can you make? Yeah, we can have a leather man. We know some leather Smiths. I think it would kind of taper off like kind of on the backside and the top side. You know what I mean? Kind of like a, almost like a piece of wood.

Like a robe piece of seaweed. Okay. Yeah. And then we can roll it up and with a nice J on it. And then we have little spots, like a big, a big little, little, uh, soda in, things for you to hit, the kind of, uh, and- Well, here's what I'd like to, I'd like to maybe have some, some hash marks. Yeah.

Uh, and we know like, so we know what it is, like a six inch by six inch something. Yeah. And we know what it is. Like a six inch by six inch something. I want to see the area you're covering with your batch. That's by 13. Six by 13. Sure, because you're going to give them a little wide birth. Six inches is nice. Sure.

And then some shooting distance. Yeah, it's nothing. Get a little leather cleaner, a little luxur, a leather cleaner. Yeah, we can roll it up, have a little leather tie that's attached to it, right? I like it and that was gonna happen. Yeah, you like You want to furl it Like that and then you hear you hear you I Jacob here by commence I have a jizz scroll

That'd be funny if we could put something like what's your favorite saying on the inside? Yeah, oh, yeah, we got to do some one like a fun one from a movie they drew first blood not me So I'm like that I'll be back I'm gonna bust you up dot dot dot go for it I'll give you every Rocky my rings outside You knocked him down why would you try to knock a me down? I love that you did it in regular guy voice. You did it in a fight.

Like Stark brother, you knocked him down. Try not to knock a me down. Try not to knock a me down. Without the exit, it's a good movie. It's a better movie. It's a phenomenon. Did anybody see Creed 3 it? No.

I didn't see any of these. I didn't see a lot of low hopes. Really? No. One and two were pretty good. One and two is the best. Yeah. Of Creeps. I mean, one was the best. Two, I thought one was the best. Two was good, but it was a little. It's just in the world, the problem is it's the world of organized professional boxing. And they, the match makers in this boxing commission are laughably, they'll put together anything. That's what I mean. Like, so a matchmaker would definitely go like, I don't think it's safe to have this guy fight the son of the man who killed his father. It doesn't make sense. You know, I mean, we shouldn't do it. I know it sells tickets, but like, it's

just seems like it's too much emotion attached to it He coldly murdered his father in the ring. Yeah, I'm worried about rich, you know revenge vigilante ism and then Yeah, but that was the thing with a Rocky Ford said it a thousand times. He kills Apollo Creed and then he's like I have to go professionally fight this guy now I have to go get involved in A. It's a great, it'll be a better story if your friend got killed in a boxing ring and then you aggressively murdered the guy who did it.

And then that's like a story of Rocky going to jail or something. I'm like, all right, I'm going to train. So hopefully this guy's going to murder me also, you know, in front of my child. Good lord. I just think, too, there's no weight class. What? Who is he fighting in, so what is Creed 3? He's fighting club or I'm scared.

Creed 3, no, no, no. Creed 3 is his friend that went to jail back in the day. He didn't get caught as friend wanted him doing time. And then he comes out after all this time, and he's Creed, he's a millionaire, he's got all this money, and he's like, he's what about me? I went to jail for you, bitch. You should have been there. I should have been what you're at. And it's creed three. So they're doing rocky three. This is like the tougher, actual like harder life guy, like coming back to clubberlang. Yeah. Yeah. I would want

to do a clubberlang today. Yeah. I wish it was clubber laying like junior. I wish the character. I would have been fine with it just being clubber laying son instead of just making it not his, you know what I mean? Like give me the goofy satisfaction if anything else, you know what I mean? Find out like a, find out Adrian was cheating on him the whole time. Like, what is he on, you know, Adrian I did it she just comes up she's like did he win she's blowing hey woman hey woman

remember when he said that they just show the the second part of that where she does meet him at the house later here she takes a little beret off and sucks his dick to to ray Gordon great comic from Philadelphia used to have a bit about that when I first started commenting maybe laugh about that when he first started commenting, made me laugh about that. When he goes, hey, pretty lady, to Adrian, hey, pretty lady, he goes, yeah, you need a real man. He goes, watch him off my apartment tonight. She what a real man is, he's get pointing out,

he goes, come over to my apartment, it's such a cocky. Like, she lives in a mansion with a Chuchu train that takes her from room to room and a robot that understands birthdays. I have. What if you look at her face? She wanted it. If you see her face, she wanted it. If you see that clip, she puts her head down like,

that's when Rocky gets mad. You're not fucking a black guy. Are you out of your mind? The deal is we do it at our house in Rocky watches. And he has to suck your dick at the end. He does clean up afterwards. While Pauli Fingafux the robot. Happy birthday, Bolly.

Yeah, when he says, and she puts her head down, it's kind of, she into it, what is that? Like, you know, Don would have been like, fuck you, you're calm, not going to your house, you piece of shit. You black motherfucker, baby, don't make it racial. Like, we were on public, we're, baby, don't make it racial. Like we were on public, we're very public, don't make this racial. Hey everybody, thanks for listening. That was just a portion of our actual serious XM radio show.

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