The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Fear No Man
Episode Date: December 3, 2024Marilyn Manson has a new song and Jay gives his thoughts on his hero's offering. Jay finds himself on an airplane with rapper Jadakiss yet again. Bob texts the crew TikTok reels to play on the show ...and his collection has gotten so large that Christine formed a database. Find out if Jamie Foxx has his own version of Freak-Offs. Bob asks Jacob if he is afraid of him. *To hear the full show to go www.siriusxm.com/bonfire to learn more FOLLOW THE CREW ON SOCIAL MEDIA: @thebonfiresxm @louisjohnson @christinemevans @bigjayoakerson @robertkellylive @louwitzkee @jjbwolfSubscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ on Apple Podcasts to listen to new episodes ad-free and a whole week early.
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And now the bonfire with Big Jay Okerson and Robert Kelly
That's a lot it's a lot of it's a lot of a lot of things in the one
It's a lot
It's a new
Yeah, Marilyn Manson album came out. I always like to I
used to get his albums just listening straight, find out which ones you like, but
this is the title track, One Assassination Under God, is that what it's called, Lou?
That's right, yes.
It's not, they're not even, he makes songs now to be like, like moments in movies or something almost, like for movie soundtr like they're not like ear catching enough yes he's in movie soundtrack mode of his
career where some some guys gonna be walking with two desert eagles walking
through fire coming out and he looks people as he's walking he looks
tremendous I mean let's not get carried away he looks tremendous for Marilyn
Manson for a human being tremendous. For Marilyn Manson.
For a human being no, but for Marilyn Manson he looks better than he did. No
for a human being also. He got skinny again that was huge. That was huge. He was
so fat and weird looking. Are you talking about me? No. Oh. I'm sorry I have fat, I have
fat insecurity still. But he looks awesome again. Yeah, I mean it's not the issue you like the look of Mara
Yeah, he does. I mean I like it for him. Yeah, he's no eyebrows blue eyes
Fuckin well, he's got the one white out eye and the brown eye right that was this thing always is he standing on chocolate
Is that chocolate sitting on rocks or a bomb bones or something?
Yeah, this isn't even the song that we're listening to.
This is a video for...
Oh, is it?
Oh yeah, it is, I guess.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't know, I don't hate it.
This is a good driving song.
You can't hate it.
Hate it's the wrong word.
It's just these are, maybe I'll be wrong on this album,
but it seems like he's making full albums now
of like what were the C songs on every other route. He'd always have songs like this
but he would still do like, you know metal and kind of like the thrash of it and
Some electronic shit in there. It's just
Yeah, that's how you so tell me ain't looking good. Yeah
By the way, what's so funny about that is he's still with that chick
That chick hung in there from going the fat to like losing weight again.
Yeah.
It's his wife.
Huh?
It's his wife.
You gotta marry that girl.
You gotta lock her down.
She's a trooper.
She's also a photographer who takes a bunch of cool pictures of him, so he looks good.
That's good.
That's why I locked down Dawn.
She went through like three fats with me.
You deserve that.
You deserve one more skinny baby.
This is, his wife's pretty.
Yeah.
But yeah, she's a photographer,
but yeah, she hung in there through this,
which could have been easy.
Yeah, he looks like he works at a deli in upstate New York.
Yeah, with like a, with a very heavy accent,
you can't understand.
Well, what do you want?
You want a matadela?
Man, I had a foreign guy issue today that drove me nuts.
What do you mean?
Driving, I took a cab home from the airport this morning.
Thank you everybody who came out.
I know we had to shuffle those shows around
to Saturday, Sunday in Houston,
but they were all packed.
They were so fun.
We condensed the Sunday shows to make it one show
and it was packed.
Thank you, what a great time that time. That was a very exhausting weekends. I shot tires Friday
Yeah, which was a very fun. Hopefully it'll be funny when it comes out the bar and you can't even you can't talk about it You're gonna wait, right?
Yeah, probably but I will say it is funny as the first time I've ever done like a character where they put me like in a
Wig and like other stuff. It was pretty neat. It was pretty cool.
And the scene was with Shane and two other guys.
You know, I about the makeup. How long were you in makeup?
I was like three hours every morning.
I'd wake up at five.
No, it was probably 45 minutes, though.
It was just a wig and makeup,
but the wig is more processed than you think.
Did they tie it in or did they...?
No, it's a clips,
but they also had to mat my hair crazy down.
Dude, I had to do a wig for sex drugs.
Yeah?
Yeah, and they put it on, it's a full wig,
and then they had to give me a haircut.
Oh, that's nice, yeah.
So it was the first time I had a haircut.
In like 15 years, and I was like, oh, I miss haircuts.
I miss the girl just kind of rubbing on you,
talking to you.
It's like this 40 minute interaction you have
with somebody you think you can like.
I go to a man.
Well, like I said, it's the same scenario.
He's a gorgeous man though.
He is a gorgeous man.
Undeniably gorgeous.
I went today and he couldn't take me
and it hurt so much and he was wearing a little cap.
He looked so handsome.
Oh, like a little Cuban cap?
Like a rolled beanie.
But like rolled.
You're talking, that's back in, it's called the Merchant Marine look.
Yeah.
He's rocking out with his big beard.
His gorgeous white shirt and his gray body.
He's wearing just all white?
He always wears white shirts.
He's not spilling anything.
Except Jizz.
Except his Jizz. What is a sexy name again, Isaiah
Isaiah what's his last name?
Who knows who knows who knows Jose? Who knows how's it? Oh, no. Oh, yeah
That is a look now for the Spanish and the brothers are all dressing with that rolled up Merchant Marine hat
He was killing it. Yeah, they do kill it. with that rolled up Merchant Marine hat. He was killing it.
Yeah, they do kill it.
I look like a Merchant Marine with it.
Yeah, that's why I would look like a dock worker for sure.
Exactly.
He goes, hey, that load of treadmills come in.
Hey, Chief.
Hey, we got those Vespas.
Where's that container of Vespas?
Hey, guy, hey, buddy, Chief.
Hey, Jay, what do you want for lunch today?
You want ham and cheese?
That's great.
Great weekend, they. Good for you.
But my argument, so this morning I flew in and landed in LaGuardia.
First of all, once again, two times now, this is strange.
Two times now in the last year I've sat on a plane across from the aisle from Jadakiss.
So weird.
Again. Shut up. Again.
Why?
They were performing in Houston, I looked it up.
Did you talk to him?
The locks are doing a reunion tour.
So, no.
But both times, we're in an airplane
where all the white people for sure,
sitting up there also, don't know who he is.
They just think, well they got, you gotta know it's somebody well. They assume. It's a rapper
I assume or an athlete yeah, they always have that vibe of you know
They always have some Louie some crazy bag sure I got this guy's got money oh
One of the other guys had a Louie the black version of the one that I have is nice
My purse just got stuck inside the console and I almost had a hissy fit.
Cause I didn't know how to get it out.
I was just going, come on, my purse is stuck.
But no, every time I, every time,
the two times I've seen Jada Kiss,
what happens is eventually I keep looking
and then we catch eyes.
Yeah.
Both times and I give a nod of like,
I know you're Jada Kiss and he gives a nod back of like,
I am Jada Kiss and then we go on with our time.
Both times that happened, no discussion.
He doesn't think, oh, that's Big Jay Okerson at all.
You don't know that.
I'm certain of it.
He might be going, I know who you are, brother.
No.
He might be going, yo, it's Big Jay
and he might be going, yo, I know, bro.
No, the nod has a face of like,
yeah, you're right, it's me.
It's definitely, it's me, nod.
Like, acknowledge, like, you don't have to keep looking
and wondering, I'm Jay to Kiss.
And he gave, like, that's what it was.
Was he quiet, or was he? Totally quiet.
But was his crew quiet?
It's hard to tell for sure, I went to sleep.
It's not really hard to tell.
I had to go to sleep.
I had to go to sleep. The old guy with the flexible suit. I had to go to sleep. I had to go to sleep.
The old guy with the flexible suit.
Here's about Christine, bring up a picture of the locks
right now in 2024.
The rest of the guys wearing Superfly or whatever,
sweat suits.
Super dry?
Super dry.
He had a bunch of dudes with him
and I have to assume one of them was Styles P,
the other guy from the locks.
But I have to see what he looks like to know if it was him.
I feel bad to be excited about Jadakiss.
The locks were performing, which means probably,
let me see.
30th anniversary tour.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I don't know.
Now which one's Jadakiss?
I'm not trying to be, I'm not being, I'm not being.
He's in the middle, well, he's in the middle.
Okay. Now did he have a chain on?
No, not that I saw.
He was also wearing, he was wearing like a windbreaker
jacket with the hood up overhead.
Yeah, they do fly like it's like, like they're, you know.
Oh yeah.
They go, you know, they're gonna take a nap.
I don't know.
Flip flops?
I couldn't, no, sneakers.
I don't know if any of the other two guys were on there
or maybe they were both there.
I tell you, black people travel really good.
A lot of black people wear sweatpants, flip-flop socks.
I won't do that.
But on the plane though, they're comfortable.
They'll bring a pillow, like not a travel pillow,
they'll bring a house pillow.
Not Jadakiss. Okay, you're right, like not a travel pillow. They'll bring a house pillow.
Not Jadakiss.
Okay, you're right, but I've seen that.
At first I was like, what's up with that?
But then I was like, wow, that's the way you should travel.
Just a house pillow and flip-flops.
How about that?
Can we acknowledge that chain, Bobby?
Yeah, that chain's bad.
I mean, that thing's nice.
You want that bad.
I don't want the medallion.
The pendant means nothing to me.
You want the chain, but that chain is a car.
Oh, at least.
That's a down payment on a nice house.
Although who is the one guy?
It is funny when you have money
and then realize what to not waste your money on.
Same thing where I don't buy,
I still just get my hoodies made.
Do you know what I mean?
Like my $25, being $40 with the work on them,
like hoodies.
Yeah.
Is what I've always, because I'm like,
I don't wanna wear a shirt that costs hundreds of dollars,
it's gonna make me feel awkward every time I eat mustard
or something like around it.
It's gonna freak me out, you know what I mean?
You just eat mustard?
Are you still doing that?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You're just eating mustard still?
Just main line it.
I thought that you got off of that.
No way.
Really?
Mustard.
Just straight in?
Yeah.
Well, all right, well, I'm sorry, dude.
Then my mouth is mustardy and then everything that passes through is mustard flavored.
All right, I know, but we talked about that.
You were gonna get off mustard, straight mustard.
I was.
I know.
And you were gonna go to packets.
I'll get back.
I'll be all right.
All right, well.
This is a minor setback. I had a long week. I had to be awake at times that I was tired Bobby. So you know things happen, okay?
I hear make a move. You know what bro? I understand you had a long weekend
You were shooting you had to do shows you had to travel. I just need a little taste
All right, you travel, you know, you're not taking the mustard with did you take the mustard with?
No, but I got a little mustard there. Okay. All right. Well, that's at least better than what you used to do
It was just packets. Okay, it I got a little mustard there. Okay, all right, well, that's at least better than what you used to do. But it was just packets.
It was just a taste.
Yeah, there's nothing more embarrassing
than being with Big J at TSA and they go,
you can't travel with a family-sized mustard, sir.
And you're like, what?
What do you mean, I can't?
You can't take Food International.
This isn't food, it's my juice.
Damn, I feel terrible that I don't know
if either of those other two guys were there.
You can't recognize them.
They look like they have glasses and black hats on.
Man, whatchamacallit, when Corey Holcomb
said that Dulce Sloan looks like Jada Kiss in an Afro wig,
nothing's made me laugh more in a podcast,
and nothing was more dead on.
I was like, what's he talking about?
Dulce Sloan looks like Jada Kiss in an Afro wig,
and then, god damn it, put them next to each other.
Nah, not that picture.
But Dulcé Sloan.
That's funny.
That's a good one.
It's really funny.
And, you know, she's never been nice.
Can I tell?
I love when you hold back from somebody
and then you realize, I don't need to do this anymore.
Yeah, she's never been nice.
She's not gonna change.
She's never been nice to me ever.
She's not gonna be a nice person.
She used to say she would always call me Jacob
and not like, buddy this is so funny
when you put these next to each other.
That's hilarious.
Bring up another picture of Jada,
that's the perfect picture of her,
I think that's the one they used.
But bring up another picture of Jada, yes,
and you'll see how much, like not the,
god damn it, that's so funny.
Yeah, she always just named,
oh, she used to call me the name Jacob,
and then I just thought she didn't know my name,
and I was like, I'm not gonna,
I don't wanna have a conversation,
like an aggressive conversation with her enough
to correct her, so I would just say hi.
And then she called me on not correcting her.
She's like, you just gotta take it.
I call you the wrong name all the time.
And she's like, oh, I was like,
I thought you just didn't know.
That was a power move on her end
to see if you'd call her on it.
You did it and then she had no respect for you.
It's fine.
You know what, I have no respect for you either
for not calling her on it.
I'm okay with all of these lack of respects.
Do you remember the football, the Super Bowl
when we were down there?
And one of the quarterback got whacked,
and I was like, good, I hope he's dead.
And she was like, you can't say that.
And I was like, go fuck yourself.
You can say it.
You can say it, it's football, this is football.
This isn't fucking.
I hope he dies.
I said I hope he dies.
I mean, of course I did did you're looking too much Christine
They appreciate it because in all of them. Yeah, she's uh, we're too hard
That's funny that she that she called you out on your being a cuck
This is because that's the right word for that. Yeah, that is you're being a cuck. So I guess the right word
Someone was calling you your wrong name intentionally to make you mad and you were just like hey
Then fuck Christine while I watched and jerked off. I think that's what cucking is If someone was calling you your wrong name intentionally to make you mad and you were just like, hey.
Did they then fuck Christine while I watched
and jerked off?
I think that's what cucking is.
I think the word's being misused.
It's taking on a new life.
That's OG cuck.
That's what it's supposed to be.
You're an OG cuck.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure.
But you're also a new way of cuck.
Oh.
Because I choose that.
It's not porn cuck.
Yeah.
It's not the OG cG. Cuck. Yeah, it's not the O.G. Cuck that you're used to.
I'm adhering to my early 2025 New Year's resolution.
No intense conversations with fat ethnic people.
That's it.
I've cut it off.
You done?
No arguments with overweight women at all, of any kind.
No fat women arguments.
No fat women arguments at all.
And steer clear of all ethnic arguments.
Can I ask a quick question?
Trump in office, dude, they're gonna become an angry.
And I don't have the answers.
Why the fat women?
What?
Why fat women?
I'll tell you exactly why fat women.
They're loveless, generally,
and they have nowhere to turn their direction.
So instead of being... Instead of... They're trying toess, generally, and they have nowhere to turn their direction. So instead of being,
instead of, they're trying to control their own destiny.
So instead of going,
well, nobody except fat, ugly people
wanna fuck a fat, ugly person.
Sometimes they just, instead of developing
a good personality, which can change a lot of things,
they go, fuck that, I'm going the other way.
I'm gonna be the aggressor.
So then it's like, I'm controlling my own destiny.
Nobody, of course, wants to get close to me because I'm an intolerable person to deal with.or, so then it's like, I'm controlling my own destiny. Nobody of course wants to get close to me
because I'm an intolerable person to deal with.
I'm gonna turn everything into an argument
about inequality of some sort.
The Patrice effect.
And the real thing is that they're just fat.
That's what Patrice did.
If you put a stunning body on any fat person,
myself included,
attitude would change.
Let me tell you something.
You guys are so, the world is so lucky
that I am not in some kind of fantastic shape
shirt-off guy because I would be a cock.
I developed personality, not negativity.
I knew I was a fat person, so I was like,
you know what, I'm gonna have to be really nice
and fun and funny and hopefully like engaging and thankful and appreciative.
And I'm not gonna be a screaming animal of some sort
about the world not being fair about things.
People don't like.
It's fat shit.
People like I'm maintaining.
Me and you are fat, but we know what fat shit is.
I'm maintaining this, I would call chub
Instead of going full shred
Getting back because I don't want to be that guy again here, and you'll be that guy. I don't choice I don't want to be sexy Bobby again because I don't think if I go back to that the water already
I don't want to lose the world's not ready. There's not enough me two lawyers out there to stop with Bobby's
It is true because we already all red's gonna have her whole docket filled up.
When you do adjust your person,
like I could have been a tough guy or a funny guy
back when I was in juvie jail.
There was two options.
Either you fought or you were funny.
And I chose funny.
And it's the same thing with fat.
Either you turn into a fucking angry fat person
or you make people like you.
Well, right, once you've accepted the removal
of yourself from romantic society,
you've just got them.
Now, what are you fighting for?
Why are you being pleasant?
Why do you try to be lovely and alluring around men
because they already don't like you,
and the ones that do like you are sad,
morbidly obese themselves,
and they're gonna deal with all that shit.
Well, they're into it.
Or you can have a good personality,
and maybe someone will come around to all these things
and be like, sure, but she's got a pretty face
and big old titties.
Yeah, but she knows kicks are mean chili.
Yeah, yeah, all these things.
There's something else besides like no, no
she's constantly angry and thinks that our mailman's racist because
He delivers to the white people next to us first always sounds like you're describing somebody but listen the thing is now is a
A few things a few people
Yeah, it is funny. If you're if you're fat, why don't you deliver my mail first?
Cuz I'm a woman because no cuz I parked on this side of the street.
I'm just walking down the houses individually in order.
He goes, but you could have done mine first.
You chose not to.
You wanted to give that white bitch her mail first.
Conspiracy theory.
It's lonely fats.
Lonely fats.
Lonely fats are also flat earthers and just all kinds of,
what was the, remember the Antifa guy?
He was hilarious.
The morbidly obese Antifa guy.
Talk about two people that are just like
deplorable human beings like arguing.
It was, what's that guy I always find interesting as hell?
The clearly gay Richard?
Fuck.
He's a clearly gay political guy.
He's the one that said there should be a white ethnostase.
Ridiculous.
Right.
Richard Spencer.
Oh.
Richard Spencer.
Richard Spencer and the head of Antifa arguing.
It's two nitwits.
It's like a pompous fucking white guy going like,
well, if you thought this, then maybe welfare
shouldn't be a thing, but blah blah blah.
White people should be blah blah blah.
And then it's just like some, I mean guy who must,
I bet he's got skin tag farms on every fold of his body.
Sloppy, dirty t-shirt, you know what I mean?
He's like a guy, and he's just there like, he's there to do this fight for freedom. His whole identity is that, because when he said,
I'm gonna go and I'm gonna personally make sure,
like I'm gonna put my face out there
in stopping this fucking shithead Richard Spencer, right?
Yeah, there he is.
I'm gonna put him, but it's just because now you have a call,
it's anything, the same, the Flat Earth people,
it's a fat guy, and there's a pretty girl who's into Flat Earth, I'm gonna put him, but it's just because now you have a call, it's anything, the same, the Flat Earth people,
it's a fat guy, and there's a pretty girl
who's into Flat Earth who now talks to him because of that.
It was the same thing I said when people came
at Legion of Skanks and they said they were gonna
fucking do stuff at the creek in the cave when we were here,
and we had Milo Yiannopoulos on.
I remember that.
And they were like spray painting stuff,
it was the most insane, it's like, do you have, and they were like spray painting stuff. It was the most like insane.
It's like do you have nothing? They were like you're playing, they're yelling all this shit. It's like this is a dumb argument to have. He's coming on a legion of skanks. What do you think
we're going to talk about? Foreign policy? Like we're going to have him on and keep talking that
it's hilarious he says he's not gay when he's clearly gay. David would be itching to do that.
Of course, but that's not what the show. My point is like if they're coming on the show
I'm reaching to do that. Of course, but that's not with the show.
My point is, if they're coming on the show,
for what it is, even if we did go on with them,
that's what I said before, buddy,
if they said Alex Jones, he's probably not allowed
in the series to be my guest, Alex Jones, is that true?
Probably not, right?
But if Alex, if he was allowed, that's not because of me.
And if they were like, Alex Jones,
he wants to go on the bonfire,
but get him in here, of course.
Yeah, I don't understand that why.
Don't you want to hear this weirdo say crazy shit?
Yeah.
It's so fun.
Yeah, of course, especially on a comedy show,
you want to hear these people.
He's gonna sit there and go,
the lizard people who are running everything
from underground bunkers, hey, yeah, yeah, keep going.
I mean, I believe most of it.
Yeah, no, I know you do, for sure.
No, you will absolutely become living in a bunker.
Can I tell you what I do believe that I found out this weekend
That's nuts sure and you probably don't know about why?
They have the did you hear about the LA tunnels for stars
No, is it real? There's LA tunnels. Have you have you ever seen in traffic? I lived in LA for two years
I've never been in traffic and looked over
and just saw Mel Gibson.
No.
Never looked over and saw fucking, you know, Ben Affleck.
Right?
Sure.
I've never seen a star.
Oh, you're saying they travel in cars in tunnels.
Buddy, they have tunnels under LA.
Listen to this.
Who told you this?
Dude, this is a real thing.
No.
Buddy, listen to me.
Bobby, what did you call them?
Hi, Jacob. Nice to see you.
Bobby.
I got you a little doll hunter.
Bobby, you're going to have to stop getting all of your news from TikTok Reels.
I cannot. I cannot. I will not.
Instagram Reels.
First of all, you want me to give up my influencer card?
Is that what you're asking me? Because that's what you're asking me.
You want me to stop getting my information from reels?
Yes, then I have to give up the influencer badge. I have and I refuse to know you don't have to it's just Christine
Give me a favor. Can you bring up? I was like Christine
Two times this week. I was like gonna make me cry two times this week. I was like
Christine let's do this. Yeah, we start watching this and, I can't, I have to put all these reels.
Every time Bobby sends the reels,
I have to make sure I get it into the database we have.
You have a database?
So she showed me this database.
I want you to look at this, Bobby.
Yeah.
Scroll down.
This is every reel you've sent.
I send a lot of stuff for us.
We didn't start this at the beginning.
We started this maybe like two months ago?
Two months ago.
Yeah.
Just so you know, the stuff highlighted pink.
Yeah, it was you.
No, no, no.
What?
That's the things we've talked about so far on this list.
That's not true.
On my life.
That's not true.
On my life.
No, no, no.
On my life, dude. We talk about it, but here's not true. On my life. That's not true. On my life. No, no, no. On my life, dude.
We talk about it, but here's the thing.
All right, there's two more.
But here's the thing.
I throw this stuff in there to just have stuff.
Usually we just talk.
This is like, let's just have all this stuff
in the background.
Look at his.
But some of it, I mean, yeah.
We talked about those too.
We talked about that.
I mean.
But I love this, because today,
Bobby said it's called the actor bond.
Hey Jacob, could you do me a favor?
Could you get a crappier microphone?
Yeah.
I checked this with Lou and he said, you're good to go.
Are you talking through a crumpled piece of paper?
Because it sounds like you are.
Are you in the actor bondumpled piece of paper? Yeah, I only active on tunnel right now in California
Are we testing satellite technology from space? Yes
Are you using your next tell
Jacob
He's chopping up. I was I was told it was good to go. I love that. You can't just take a
Jacob tell us you can't just throw it on me. You can't to go. I love that you can't just take a hit. Jacob, tell us.
You can't just go.
Just throw it on me.
You can't just go, let me fix it.
Jacob, are the plants growing there?
Are they growing?
Can you tell us anything?
Is there an atmosphere where you're at?
Jacob, if you shit, you can make fertilizer
to grow the potato.
Get the potato, take the little potatoes off the bottom,
you'll have more potatoes.
Bobby, me and you can do a
Patreon yes for the next year yes if we just said hey patron
Let's just grab three of these and do a show about it
It's a crazy amount of stuff. I do send a lot of stuff
Because anytime I see something that we could talk about I I send it into the chat. Should we start another chat?
Of just reels?
Of just reels?
Well, no, it doesn't make a difference really.
She has to put it in the database.
But I feel like there's been conversations
at the Okerson house where it's like,
this guy's losing his mind.
I feel, let me just, hang on, hang on.
I feel like there's conversations where,
I think, listen, Dan never said anything.
Dan just showed up.
I'm trying to send stuff that we have
so we'll have things on this thing, right?
As opposed to, but I feel like maybe
this should be a different thing
so I don't clog up the main highway of communication
between the bonfire and us.
Christine's Hershey Highway.
And maybe it's just the crew and Christine.
No, this isn't my concern.
I want you both to look at me in the face
at the same time.
Has there been a conversation at the O?
Yes.
I will.
I will.
I will.
I will. I will. I will.
I will.
I will.
I will.
Have I said I feel like I'm watching
somebody else's For You page?
Yes I have.
Yes I have.
Yes I have.
But no, the thing is with just the.
Bobby's scrolling again, just got five in a row.
Bobby's scrolling again, just got five in a row.
The problem with just the reels.
Yes.
Is there's no, so it was funny.
All right, I talked to Christine this weekend
and I go, hey, you see, I did that in the chat today
to give a little thing of, once in a while
it could just be this without video attachments
or real, I was just like, Chris Maloney's got a new
commercial out for stuff that is so cringey.
And then under that I was watching the TV
and the green room was on, On Patrol, and I was like, and then I was watching the TV and the green room was on, On Patrol,
and I was like, the three On Patrol hosts are hilariously,
I mean, three jacked old men wearing tight sweaters
and just judging this, it's very, very funny to look at.
And then I was like, you know, that's Bobby O'Gara,
like that kind of stuff, like, oh,
like, you know, me and Don fought about blah, blah, blah,
or I saw this on TV,
and it's just the reels.
Here's the thing.
There's a few different chats we have going, right?
And there's like, there's another bonfire thing,
then there's this one, then there's the us three, right?
And then there's the you. That's just a friendship. And then there there's the us three, right? And then there's the you.
That's just a friendship.
And then there's a me and you, right?
So there's like, there's a, I don't know,
I'm confused with which, hang on, which, I'm sorry,
which one we do that little hey-hoo-ha-hoo back, right?
And-
Any one you want.
Okay, well, the guy that you sent,
I thought that was hilarious.
I thought the sock guy from, what's his name?
Oh, Chris Maloney.
Chris Maloney, it was hilarious.
But I got that late because I was a little sick.
So I got that today.
But I thought that was great.
And it made me happy that you threw something in too.
And you were like, dude, check this out.
And I was like, yeah. Because I feel like I'm the only one throwing shit in too. And you were like, dude, check this out. And I was like, yeah.
Because I feel like I'm the only one throwing shit in there.
Or Lou, Black Lou, put stuff in too.
But that's more supposed to be everybody, right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.
But the reels. Yep.
So throw your reels up, by the way.
If you think of the reel, it's fucking fantastic.
Listen, first of all, I don't know if I'm gonna.
Because. Bobby, everybody loves your reels.
I've been in your house with the J,
the Okerson conversations about, you know,
dude, did you see this fucking thing?
Oh, shit-talking people?
I don't wanna be, I don't wanna be,
I don't wanna be, I mean, I'm honored that I was part of it.
This isn't shit-talk, this isn't shit-talk at all.
I know, I know, I know.
No, this isn't shit-talk.
We're like, wow.
It's a lot, I do a lot of work for the show.
It's a lot of reels.
I do a lot of work for the show.
Stop calling it work when you're at an airport,
you're at an airport waiting to get on a plane
and you go, oh, midget on fire.
Sends, sends.
Let's go through, let's go,
I bet all my reels could be talking,
can I be honest with you too?
I edit myself from putting the ones as much as I want.
I literally go, I have ones on save,
or I might, no, just save that one.
Jacob, you should know, Jacob fears you in a terrible way.
He fears you.
Fears me?
He has the fear of God.
They fear you.
No, no, no, he fears you. No, he fears you. No, no, no, no, he fears you. Fears me? He has the fear of God. They fear you. No, no, no, he fears you.
No, he fears you.
No, no, no, no, he fears you.
Jacob, can you pull Jacob?
Because with Jacob, because if I was sending,
if I was sending reels like this,
I would have already had a conversation with Jacob
because these are all visual things, they're all videos,
and it can't just be us watching videos,
and us watching videos, and us watching videos.
He doesn't say that to you,
because he fears you and your masculinity.
Hey Jacob. Jacob honey?
He thinks you're gonna bushcraft him to death.
Jacob just went from him to having a little girl with him.
Oh yeah, this is appropriate for that.
That was weird.
No, no, sorry, she came in at the wrong time.
My knees.
Can I talk or does my mic sound shitty?
You can talk and it sounds shitty.
But we actually like it now.
We want people to complain about you,
so keep talking.
It's funnier if people have complaints
about your microphones.
No, I like Bobby's submissions.
I tell him this one's too visual on our Monday.
No, I don't want you picking.
But I rarely say things.
I don't want you picking.
I don't want you figuring this out.
I'm asking you a question right now.
Did you just hit somebody?
Did you just hit that little girl?
Girl Jacob just reached across something and looked like he smacked somebody across her face for coming interrupting your door on work time Just fucking pussy
Bugs they come into the house. Yeah. Yeah. I
Look like you just put somebody's face against the glass, son. Hey Jacob, stop putting your arm up
so unless you have a tricep, you get it.
Jacob, do you fear me or Jay?
Who do you fear more?
I don't fear anyone.
Oh God.
Neither one of you.
You fear no man?
I'd like you to get that tattooed on your chest
if you could.
You should.
Fear no man.
Jacob, you gotta get a fear no man tattoo across your chest if you could. You should. Fear no man. Jacob, you're getting a fear no man tattoo
across your chest would rule.
It only shows me where tank tops when you work out.
Yeah.
Fear no man.
It only shows when you're shooting iguanas
with your Pelican.
Who's that crazy guy?
I fear no Mia, but I do fear iguanas.
They're an endangered species and invasive.
Jacob, you don't fear me, right?
No, not at all.
I wanna ask you something right now.
Listen, this is a great thing.
I love working with you.
I love working with you too, Jacob.
I don't think Jay said he doesn't like working with me.
I love working with you.
I'm pretty sure he said,
I don't know why you brought that up.
I'm pretty sure just say I throw a lot of videos
into a chat.
But let me ask you a question, Jacob.
Do I, and this is your opportunity right now,
this, we're having a, we're working this out on the air.
I want that hoodie for Jacob immediately.
Please show that again.
Do I send too many videos into the chat?
Jacob?
I don't think so, no.
I like them, so they crack me up,
even if we don't use them, they make me laugh.
Fear no man.
DJ Lou, do I send too many videos into the chat?
Well, if it makes sense, Bobby, I will send this.
I watched them all.
It's not that you send too many videos to the chat.
I mean, you brought up a list of them.
No, let me say what I'm saying.
It's our document.
I have to have them ready to go for the show.
Her thing is, if you ever bring the stuff up,
she wants to make sure she has it on call.
But I feel like you're documenting them
to hold them against me to go,
No, no, no, no, no.
Big Jim, look at this shit.
I mean, this guy's fucking nuts.
I documented them because I'm an organizer.
And I was like, we have to be able,
you send them on text.
But I feel like I'm pulling up on the computer.
She's like, it's this way, if you call up on the thing,
like, oh, I sent you a thing a while back,
she has them all ready to go.
Let me ask you a question.
And DJ Lou, you were about to answer.
Do I send too many video clips?
They're hard to catch up with.
What?
It's hard.
I fall behind and I don't do anything.
My roof.
What was that opening?
My roof.
Jacob, there's your future sweatshirt, Jacob. I'm getting you the whole fear no man collection
Jacob it's not fears no man
The world is yours
flame pants
Griffin
We went over like I
Wouldn't want to say 10 or 15 things that were all good that Bobby submitted
Yeah, it's on the rundown. I mean looking at this list though. There's only
out of the one two three four five six seven eight nine ten eleven twelve
Are you keep counting no, I'm just you'll never be able to count yeah, you'll never be the count Bobby
out of
216 216 there's only eight
highlighted one two three
Four five six seven seven eight nine ten, okay
Mm-hmm 1112 that was last week. Mm-hmm 11 12 that was last week mm-hmm
200 this weekend no no no I sent that many this weekend. Yeah, I was sick in bed though So I had a lot of extra time
We didn't talk about any of those you sent 52
That's not true. Can you read a couple of those? You sent 52? No, shut up with your numbers. That's not true. Can you read a couple of them?
What's that? What's that? What do you say? So you have to put this in and then type out a name for it?
Well, don't do these ones because these are ones we can get to. These are your ones here.
I had a two-year affair. I don't know what that is. Dane Mueller coaching. did he poison Jamie Foxx? Oh, that's a good one. He actually came out on a special.
Jamie Foxx had a special, Netflix.
New?
Yeah, and he said.
He just had a special coming out, Jamie Foxx?
No, it didn't come out, I think he filmed it.
Filmed it, and apparently, on that clip,
in the comic, I forget the guy's name,
he's a bald, goofy comic. He's in a lot of shit
He has a space between his teeth. You'll know who he is cuz you have that memory
That dude, what's his name? Paul shear and Paul shear and the other dude and a white guy a white guy
That looks like he's a ghost Paul Sheeran some guy. Yeah, apparently he
He in his special he said said, Diddy poisoned me.
Really?
He did it, he poisoned him.
He tried to take him out.
And he called the FBI on Diddy.
He's the one. Really?
Well it's funny because the time-
So that's what they're saying,
that's what started up the P. Diddy investigation?
The timeline does go with that.
And it's crazy that he tried to murder him.
Yeah, play the clip.
And then do, yeah, go ahead.
All right, you remember Jamie Foxx was in the hospital,
right?
Yes, where is this going?
So Jamie Foxx shot his comedy special this week.
And in the middle of his comedy special,
he said, I am the one.
Is that Rob Huber or whatever?
Rob Huber or something like that?
You know where I like that guy from?
Not Paul Scheer, but the other one.
I'm pretty sure that's him.
He used to be, when I first moved to New York
at the AMC theaters, he was the loud on the phone guy
in the trailers for them, they were really good. And he was like, yeah, one of the words was like, yeah, phone guy in the trailer. They were really good.
And he was like, yeah, one of the words was like,
yeah, yeah, Rob Hubel.
He'd go like, my favorite one was he was like,
he was on the witness stand at one point,
and he goes, it's pronounced karate.
I don't know why that always tickled me.
But he's funny, he's like one of those crew of guys,
like the human giant dudes and stuff.
Go ahead, Blaine. I'm sorry called
the FBI on Diddy because
He poisoned me. That's the reason I went to the hospital. That's the reason why he almost died is because Diddy
poisoned Jamie Foxx
Jamie Foxx brought down Diddy. I think Diddy tries to kill people with like
Old-school fucking I mean like real like 17th century
Like murders. Yeah a poison dart from across the room. Poison?
Cuz Jamie Foxx was supposed to had like epic
Competition competitive party. He did not rival Diddy.. No, his parties, he actually talked about it.
He would have parties, but he would have really cheap food.
Jamie Foxx?
Yeah, Jamie Foxx would throw these big bashes,
but he would have Doritos and stuff like that.
He wouldn't go all out with that stuff,
but he had still a sick party without all the bullshit
that Diddy would have.
I'm not talking about the food.
Are you talking, are you?
Yeah, I don't know if you know this,
but our little, our very own Jacob Attat here
was once on the inside circle,
he was on the inner circle of Jamie Foxx.
What, was he a waiter?
No. Did he park cars?
No, no, he said he had to stay home
because he wasn't allowed to the parties
because he was white and wasn't willing
to play naked basketball. Jamie Foxx apparently was maybe that's the battle. I think P. Diddy had the underage girls and
Guys at the thing and it sounds like Jamie Foxx's thing was lots of guys
His was like a full-on gay party while P. Diddy had an all all holes
Yeah on the table party.
Yeah, all holes.
Everyone gets some, dude ass, girl puss, tits, balls,
assholes of both genders.
Every hole is on the table at a P. Diddy party.
And it sounds like Jamie Foxx was much more excited
about having a lot of dudes naked in his house.
Wouldn't you?
No.
I would have some me and you messing around
and Christine comes up, what are you guys going?
I'm hungry.
Oh man.
We were just about to suck each other off for the third time.
I'm gonna get a hot tub one day
and then me and you were gonna get naked in it.
You just sit naked in a hot tub.
I can't wait, dude.
I'm gonna ask you, I'm gonna do that thing
where I'm gonna touch your balls
but they're already floating.
I can't wait to hold my breath for as long as I can.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Christine comes in, I have to see,
you keep pushing my head under.
Yeah, yeah.
Hey, Jay.
Yo, bet me I can't hold my breath
for as long as it takes you to come.
Yeah.
Bet me, bet me I can't make you come before I die.
Seriously though, Jay, one day when Christine is out,
when she's coming, I'll come over,
we should definitely just fucking bang in the hot tub,
just to fuck with her.
Absolutely, you know what would be really hilarious
if Christine came home and was like,
guys, why is there cum in blood
all over the outside of the hot tub?
And I'll go, I don't know.
I'm gonna play coy.
You see Justin Silva's dead body floating in the air.
We fucked him to death.
He said he could take it,
but he bit off more than he can chew this day, I tell you.
Yeah, I mean, it's funny to me because,
I mean, it gets Jada Pinkett, there's P. Diddy's ex-girl.
Everybody just has all these stories now
where she came over, Diddy was just having sex with dudes
and like masturbating and all the guys, and she was having sex with dudes
and like masturbating and all the guys and she was having sex with Jada.
And then Jada, they were just bad.
I mean they were just all fucking.
And it makes sense too because Jada's into gay dudes man.
And if you look at Tupac when he was young,
I know you can be gangster and like a dick.
Sure.
And it's funny to me, this whole thing that looks so cool
and badass and alpha, they're all just fucking,
fucking each other.
It's very possible.
Wendy Williams has been trying to tell us forever
what we didn't listen.
We just let her eyes go big and fucking die out.
Yeah, we let her feet swell up.
We let her legs swell up and lose her fucking mind.
I wonder if somebody poisoned her.
She was our queen.
What if somebody took her out?
Someone gave her Graves' disease.
Yeah, I mean gave her something.
I mean, she went quick, right?
She had her shit together.
She always had some sickly stuff.
She also a drug addict.
She also an alcoholic.
So it's like she has a lot going for her.
She's declining no matter what.
But someone enables her for sure
to fucking whack her life out completely.
That husband who used to come with her
to the Caroline's Comedy Shows all the time
was so funny that I've been doing comedy long enough
that I got to meet him when they were like a couple.
And then like for him to be like,
her life just, he just left.
He started vacationing
and taking pictures with a 20-something year old hot chick.
While they were still together,
there was vacation pictures of them two
holding hands on the beach somewhere.
And then so then she was like, well whatever,
I'm still the queen of all this shit,
but she's unraveled.
She did quick, I'm not gonna say fast.
It seems like that split.
That got her drugs and all that stuff. But she got in trouble with Diddy.
Didn't she?
She said something about Diddy,
and he came back and said,
am I right about that?
I'm pretty sure you told me about that.
Maybe.
She said something about Diddy being gay or something,
and then she got kicked off the radio station.
Maybe he was like,
you'll never have any of my artists again on the...
Oh, yeah.
She had to come back and apologize, right?
It's like Diddy over the years, yeah.
Firing, yeah.
So they had a problem.
And all of a sudden she's, I mean, if this guy's,
dude, he put-
Fucking P. Diddy looks like the goddamn,
whatever that rodent from Madagascar is.
He looks like his pupils.
The lemur?
The lemur.
He looks like he's got lemur eyes.
Why are his eyes so jaundice?
Yeah.
And all those white parties,
there's videos coming out
where people wearing elk horns and shit.
I really hope they'll be good.
That'd be great.
Yeah.
And there's just some drunk girl
in the middle of just a bunch of black dudes
wearing white and some chick wearing elk horns.
Yo, why is Buster Rhy rhymes dressed like a wendigo?
It's all
that clip of
Like Snoop Dogg and was that dr. Dre that now all of a sudden Jacob loves the clips
Our back does this go hang on one one second, Jacob, real quick. Christine, pank it, please.
Ha ha ha ha.
Give me a pank it, thanks.
We didn't finish it though, should we finish it?
I will finish it, but don't forget to pank it.
Pank it.
Hey Christine.
Hey Christine.
Yeah.
For you, this was a big step for you.
Wow.
Talking to Bobby about his clips.
No, no, no, no, you're not gonna do it.
I think you're gonna, this is, are you kidding me? You've. Oh no. Just found yourself. What?
Down. Oh God. To negative one. Pivins. Wow. Wow. What a goddamn right. You're only in
debt one more pivin to be out. And I'll tell you what, Chrissy, by the new year, you could be net positive on Pivens.
It might be nuts.
Let's hope.
I mean, let's not get, let's kind of,
you're getting a little cocky right now.
You turned to pink, thank you.
And look, if you want Dre Snoop P Diddy,
oh, we go there, it's right there.
Pink that, please.
There we go.
But we haven't really watched it.
But here's the thing.
You can't just pink the sheet
when we haven't talked about it.
Don't just start pinking it up, Bobby,
so you act like, what do you mean we talk about all this?
Look how pink it all is.
No, you're absolutely right, and I respect that,
but you're lucky I don't run the pivots
because you'd be back in the pivots
with whatever the hell that thing you just gave me.
Jacob, did you just put a fucking layer on in Florida
in a house that you choose the air conditioning level at?
It's cranked in this room I get all the AC I love it.
Everywhere you go it's just not good for you.
You know what I mean?
Everywhere you go it's bad.
I'm not complaining.
Yeah but you look like you're complaining.
You putting something on makes us know that you went, it's cold.
You give it a nice aggressive half zipper up, like Dexter getting ready to go kill.
Dude, that's so funny.
I've been watching all of Dexter this weekend on Reels.
Love Dexter.
Dude, new show.
Did you watch Dexter the first time?
I love Dexter.
Love it.
It lost steam heavy.
Of course it did, but you can't.
But season four of Dexter.
You can't keep up that thing.
Season four of Dexter.
Top seasons of any show.
John Lithgow, one of the best seasons ever of TV.
Here's the thing, new show,
and I can't believe that this guy is just cranking out.
You gonna say Lioness?
Nope.
Landman.
Oh, come on.
You don't like Landman.
I didn't watch it.
We watched the trailers and they go, it goes, Child watch it. We watched the trailers, and they go,
it goes, Chyler Sheridan's back again.
And then they go, Billy Bob Thornton dressed
like a jag off, by the way.
I'm not talking about on the show, in his interviews.
Because now he keeps getting asked
to play like an older kind of grizzled guy.
Or like what he was in Fargo, like a killer with the, they make him look so weird
because he's odd looking in like life
that when he does interviews,
do you see the way he dresses?
He's doing like a Keith Richards thing.
He's doing exactly, he's doing like a Johnny Depp.
What's that rapper on his head, you're right.
Well I'll tell you why, he wears a wig
and he doesn't want to have to wear a wig.
He's bald under that, number one,
because if you see him in Tombstone, he has no hair
and then everything else from then on, he has wig wasn't in tombstone. He was sorry
Are you are you are you just Jacob don't I don't need your help
Look at me Jay. Look at me. Are you it's the greatest scene in tombstone
What?
The greatest scene in tombstone. There's only one greatest scene in Tombstone.
I would say there's two.
I'm here Huckleberry.
There's two, and it's not Huckleberry.
I'm here Huckleberry.
It's not Huckleberry.
What is it?
It's from carrying the casket.
Why would you correct me and not even know the answer?
Sorry.
It's not Huckleberry, what is it?
I don't know.
All right, here's the scene and now you remember it.
This is probably.
I'm a cowboy.
I would say this is the second.
I say that scene's great, I would say this is the second,
but this is my favorite.
Give me this.
Kinda nice in here.
There you go.
You run it?
This is Toonstone.
Bill Joyce, owner, operator.
When they're at the bar.
That's Kurt Russell.
And he first gets to the bar.
He first gets, he's starting over with him and his brother and he's gonna get
Himself a poker game. Yeah, and he goes into the bar and he runs into Billy Bob Thornton. Okay, there you go play
What a point there we go. Yeah sure I said lay off the point
Here the voice I swear I'm gonna slap so I don't know where this at all
Excuse me for asking. He was fat and bald
Is he fat? Yes. Let me see go forward
You can go forward all the way go all the way to where you confront them right go back a little further Wow right there
Go right there. You nerve-racking sons of bitches. He looks so different
Something on your mind I
Honestly would have guessed that like you could have told I would have glazed right over that watching that and not realize that was Billy Bob
Thornton. Yeah, it's Billy Bob Thornton and then wow and then if you go a little further
He's go to the end where he's outside coming up
Dude that's the best scene go back. I want to hear that. This is so manly good
Go ahead skin it skin it skin that smoke wagon and see what happens.
I want to say that to somebody so bad.
Listen, mister, I'm getting awful tired of your shit.
Tired of your gas, now jerk that pistol and go to work.
I said throw down, boy.
Here we go.
Billy Bob.
Ready?
You're gonna have to do it.
You're gonna have to do it.
You're gonna have to do it.
You're gonna have to do it.
You're gonna have to do it.
You're gonna have to do it.
You're gonna have to do it.
You're gonna have to do it.
You're gonna have to do it.
You're gonna have to do it.
You're gonna have to do it.
You're gonna have to do it.
You're gonna have to do it. You're gonna have to do it. You're gonna have to do it. You're gonna have to do it. You're gonna have to do it. I said throw down, boy. Oh!
Here we go. Billy Bob Thorne.
Ready?
You gonna do something or just stand there and bleed?
I mean, dude, come on. I wanna say that to a guy in my life.
You can.
I wanna slap somebody and make him bleed.
Well, you don't have to do it for that.
You can just wait, like, let's say,
fucking Dawn cuts herself in the kitchen or something.
Just smack her?
You gonna do something or just sit there and bleed? What are you gonna do, you gonna do something?
Max gets hit by a car, you gonna do something
or you gonna sit there and bleed, boy?
But when they were showing the land man,
like the sneak previews, they were doing that
during Yellowstone, right?
They were selling it hard.
I think it was during Yellowstone,
they were selling it real hard.
Just real quick, he lost a lot of weight
to do sling blade after that,
and he was bald in sling blade, that was him.
And then he got real thin after that,
he started dating Angelina.
Armageddon, he was skinny.
Angelina Jolie, he got real thin,
but he wears a toupee all the time,
except in life.
That doesn't blow my mind, but still,
and I'm for that, it's just,
the style he's choosing doesn't seem to go
with what you're gonna think he dresses like in life.
He wears, he actually said in the interview,
and it's funny you bring this up,
in the interview he did with all the news for Landman,
he's dressed crazy, right?
He wears women's jeans,
because all the jeans he wears on TV are guys' jeans,
and they baggy and boxy and they feel like shit.
So in life, he wears women's skinny jeans.
Yeah.
Because he has little tiny pin legs.
That doesn't blow my mind.
He's just like...
That's weird, because men's jeans are generally like slimmer
than women's, because you guys don't have hips.
Yeah, our jeans...
It's not even not a cool look.
It's a fine look. at the end of the day.
It's just that I don't believe it.
Does that make sense?
He isn't a band though.
I don't believe him.
He has a band.
He's a musician.
Barely.
That band does jack shit.
If he was that much of a musician, the music would mean something.
You saw that.
That's a long time ago.
Remember that interview where he went on?
I'm sorry.
And they started asking him questions about acting.
He's like, that ain't what this is about, man.
I mean, I hear you, but I still love Billy Bob acting.
Goliath, it was insane.
Fargo, he was on board.
Fargo was great, Goliath, he's awesome.
He's just great in everything he does.
And in Land Man, I'm telling you,
it's a, if you know anything about the oil in Texas
and in this country and how fucked up those areas are
in West Texas where we're just drilling in the earth
and these guys just live out there
and it's hookers and danger and it's just crazy shit.
I've known about this.
Hookers and danger.
Dude, because they live out,
they get paid a lot of money, the oil guys.
But they live out there for six months.
And their families are somewhere else.
And it's all bars, everything is kind of contained
in that area.
And there's bars and prostitution and drugs
and all kinds of fucked up shit.
It's really like the old west out in these areas.
Like, you know, so to do a show about this
is to me pretty interesting.
And Billy Bob Thornton.
Just the way he saw, I love Billy Bob Thornton
as an actor.
And they show, they show nudity,
they have his daughter in it, it's funny.
You don't have to whisper it.
When I whisper I had intensity.
You're listening nudity.
Yeah, but the guy listening with his kid, his wife.
Sometimes you get to see boobs.
Boobs. Sometimes they show butts.
He's really great, dude.
This is a great, another,
I say another hit out of Taylor Sharerden.
Probably.
All the TV I watch that I enjoy, Taylor Sharerden.
I think what we said, though,
me and Christine both agreed, like, this is one,
let's let this one finish up this season
and then binge it.
Because I have a feeling like it's gonna be slow getting into the story as
far as giving a shit about because when he said he sits there with his goofy
pirate earring in his ear hanging out in his cocked sideways hat and he goes is
really about seeing the side of the old business you don't get to see every day
like who's asking for that it's It's pretty, it's really interesting business,
the way these people live.
You're gonna dress like him so bad.
Oh, that?
It's a sad thing.
We have a big Legion of Skanks fan
from years ago from Edmonton.
I would love to dress like that, by the way.
FYI, if I didn't have a son, I would dress like that.
That's fine.
You can see it.
I would have to sneak out and put it all in the garage
and then run to the car so no one could see me.
When I went to Isabella's,
when I chaperoned Isabella's school trip
when she was younger and all of her friends
asked her dad if her dad was a pirate.
She said, you're not a pirate?
She's like, no.
He looks like a pirate.
And I was like, Isabella,
I do look like a pirate to these kids.
Yeah, you do. You look like a pirate to your friends. A a pirate. And I was like, Isabella, I do look like a pirate to these kids. Yeah, you do.
You look like a pirate to your friends.
A gay pirate.
Is Jay gonna be coming dressed like a pirate again?
Is the gay pirate showing up?
Is Jay coming in his pirate clothes?
I didn't call you Bobby, but look,
you like this one.
You're happy with this.
I'm so happy with white.
You know what you do?
You do what the city does with tolls.
You tell us it's gonna be like $45
and they make it nine and we're happy.
You threw that Barbie pink, the black pussy pink,
and then you went back to white, so I'm happy with white.
Because I wouldn't have been happy with pearl white.
But I am now because it's not Barbie,
it's not Barbie, black pussy pink.
Black pussy pink, yes.
Thank you.
I respect your name.
I'm gonna watch Land Man at some point.
I think you're okay with that because,
look, I'm interested in it because I know about the whole,
I've read scripts, like eight years ago,
there was a script going around that I was
kind of gonna be up for about the oil companies
and these places where they live,
it's like they live,
it's like they live in these long row houses,
all the guys that work on it,
and there's just all kinds of fucking crazy shit.
It's like the old west.
Bobby, you wanna be a serious, serious actor so bad?
I mean.
I can't wait to, I wanna see you interviewed
with a scarf, indoor scarf on.
God, dude.
Some circle glasses.
I mean, why don't you try right now?
Try interviewing me right now like I'm on this show.
Can I give you the...
Christine, can you bring up the questions
that James Lipton's hero, Jean-Pierre Plouplou,
those questions please so I could ask them to Bobby.
Yeah, please.
Jacob, you know the name of his hero.
Yep.
Chaplain Plouplou.
Chaplain Plouplou. What is it?-pon-plan? Chaplain-pon-plan.
What is it?
Sir LaTob?
Sir LaTobla?
I don't remember.
You don't remember his name?
Sir LaTob?
Well fine, I know we have to take a break.
When we come back, you can ask me the questions
and I'll be interviewed as a serious actor.
Oh, here we go.
There it is, dude.
But wait, what's the name of the guy?
Because I want to say the guy's name.
I didn't know there was a guy.
Oh, no.
He goes, these are the questions that were brought up by
Bernard Pivot.
Yes.
Pivot.
I'll ask when we come back.
We're going to get Bernard Pivot's questions on Bobby.
Actor Bobby.
Robert Kelly.
Robert?
Robert Patrick Kelly.
No.
Robert Donlon Kelly.
Donlon?
My acting name in SAG is my mother's maiden name
because there was a Robert Patrick Kelly.
So if you look on things, it says every once in a while,
Robert Donlon Kelly.
Wow, that is Irish.
Christine, real quick, make it pink.
Wait, what are we making?
The last one.
That wasn't on there.
Oh, it was on there.
Billy Bob Thornton?
The Jamie one was on there. You, it was on there. It was Billy Bob Thornton. The Jamie one was on there
You made that pink, right? Yeah, okay, and the Billy Bob Thornton. We had something on there, too
Didn't we Jacob? No, you just said that you just talked about landmally
Well, can you I do have our
For this interview. Yeah, but you're not here. So there's not a scarf or a shawl or an ascot
So what are you talking about Bobby where there's a big Jays back pocket. There's a scarf. I forgot. I forgot. Yes. I will wear a scarf
It's really a Hamas scarf, but I will wear it it is but we will fashion it to be not like that
It's happy to be back at the bottom. I know we have a short week this week. We only have a
We have tomorrow. We're gonna be live and then we'll have a short week this week. We only have, we have tomorrow,
we're gonna be live and then we'll have a pre-record for you guys on Wednesday, Thanksgiving,
Eve. And then we'll be back the next week. Business as usual until Christmas. Until Christmas
break. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We have two weeks off at the end of the year. Yeah. We're gonna
be back everybody. 2025. We're back. New energy. Yeah. A fucking a spreadsheet full of pink. I mean. A big
ass spreadsheet. I mean I'm just trying to think about the show. Bobby, Bobby your effort
is world class. Two pivots. Oh my god. Two pivots out of the gates today. Thank you so
much. Because hey what? The effort's noted. Thank you so much. Because, hey, what? The effort's noted.
I just can't watch as many reels.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
There's always, there's no rhyme or,
some of them will be like,
hey, this is really impactful
on the political spectrum of things.
And then you're like,
look at all these Haitians in a car accident.
Maybe when we get back, we can watch that fat girl
that I'm into watching her eat.
All she does is eat, and I can't stop watching her.
Is this Billy Bob Thornton? Please play this louder.
This is Billy Bob.
So you're saying that's a tube.
Yeah, it's a tube. Well you saw it in that.
It's a toupee.
That's funny. He wears a, he has a hair system I feel like.
He might have. He's got a great mouth though doesn't he?
The guy's cool looking yeah, he's cool man. He is Billy Bob is cool for a dirty thin little ratty, dude
But no one
Now his voice singing voice sucks shit. Yeah, we're just talking his voice
We should start a band why not if
he could do it we could do it absolutely we can let's do it we could be as
unsuccessful as Billy Bob Thornton and the Boozman so they're called the
Boozman the songs called Angelina the Booz and haters oh it's about Jolie yeah I fucked you right into Brad Pitt's beautiful arms.
He got drunk and hit you just like I did too.
And now he's raising my Filipino children.
We'll be right back everybody.
It's Le Bon Fire in French.