The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Go, Greased Lightnin'

Episode Date: August 17, 2022

Jay rediscovers startling information about Dan and somehow an argument over Grease breaks out.Stream "The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson & Dan Soder" for 3 months free on the SiruisXM app! Offer Details Apply: www.SiriusXM.com/BonfireFollow us on all social media @TheBonfireXM@DanSoder www.DanSoder.com@BigJayOakerson www.BigJayOakerson.com

Hey guys, real quick, before we start the podcast, we want to let you know that me and Dan Soder are all over the place on the road. Make sure you check us out. Dan's going to be performing this weekend in Phoenix at Stand Up Live. It's August 18th through the 20th, after that he's going to be in Tulsa, Oklahoma, one night at a comedy festival. Get tickets for that right now and all of his other tour dates at dansoder.com. Omaha, Nebraska, this Friday and Saturday. Make sure you go check out Big J. O'Kristen at dansoder.com. Omaha, Nebraska this Friday and Saturday make sure you go check out big J.

Oakerson at the funny bone. Again, that's this Friday, August 19th and Saturday the 20th. After that, he'll become a Tampa, Maryland, Columbus and more for tickets and all other tour dates. Go to bigjcomedy.com. Also, if you hit over to series xm.com slash bonfire. Yes. Yay! We're offering a special offer right now of offering three months for free offer. I like to say offer a lot. What an offer!

And now, the Bonfire with Big J. Ocasin and Dan Soder. And now, the Bonfire with Big J. Ocerson and Dan Soder. Why blanked on it because Christine knows that I assume you said it on the show, but yeah I've found out that Dan for a while carried a piece in Arizona. I didn't carry a piece. I had a gun He had a piece on him. I didn't have a piece army He didn't you said you went to the bathroom one. I took a shower with your piece I put the gun in the bathroom because I didn't know the guy that was there in case you have to put it in his fucking chest I just didn't know dude if you weren't fucking sideways on me. I would put you down. I will put you down. Yeah. Long story short. Well I weren't I worked with Kaffee. Shout out Kaffee. I there was another DJ at KLPX who was like a weekender because I worked over nights and weekends. And I worked with

him a couple times on the weekend. And we get high and spoke cigarettes in the parking lot. And he was like, yeah, my girlfriend kicked me out. He was a bum the whole time. No, dude, I swear to God, I didn't know he was a bum. I was like, oh, this guy's nice. For a bum. I forgot his name, I was like, John, I was like, John's nice.

And then, uh... He's very industrious the way he smokes quarter left of cigarettes off the floor. It's crazy. He can turn all those butts into one cigarette. He doesn't even, it's crazy. He's got my pack every, he's never not smoking. But he was like, yeah, I got kicked out and I was like 21 at the time and I was still, you know, pie-eyed and a little dumb and I was like, oh man, that's, I was just doing, I was telling Jay I was doing like the, uh-huh man, that's crazy.

Oh, that sucks. And then he's like, shh. Got no place to stay. I was like doing, I was telling Jay I was doing like the, uh-huh, man, that's crazy. Ah, that sucks. And then he's like, got no place to stay. I was like, well, if you end up not finding a place, you could probably crash with me. I live by myself and he was like, okay, and I didn't hear from him in the-

It's good instincts because, I mean, it's very nice instincts, I should say, because my thing there is particularly to tell him the fake reason why I would- But I couldn't. I'll do it if my fucking sister wasn't standing me this week. I'd say you can crash in my place. Can I be honest?

I wouldn't be surprised if maybe there was a little of that if I was like so and so and so staying with me. But you know, maybe at some point, because you're something you pushed them off because you probably would have taken you up on it that night. Yeah. I because I pushed them off. However, I pushed off. I pushed off like, you know, like for a couple of days, yeah, it goes,

I'm not right now. It's not a great time, but you know, it looked like me in the roller decks. And he did. And three days later, he was like, I need to stay with you bad. And I did the thing we're similarly with. Remember when I got got by that guy, Paul, driving to Vegas. And he was was like we got to bring my dog And I was like your dog's not coming. He's like all this take him out to the desert and shoot him No, no, the dog can come okay But you don't yeah this guy he did that to me, but he was just like oh, it's all right, man I guess I'll just like sleep outside tonight or something and find a place to think I was nice out tonight

Right, right? I'm. Talk about the Zeriz on the weather, dry. He's later. I'm going to go beat off loud in my room. And so exactly what I would have said. What's right? I never would have even hinted that they could stay. All right, Jacob. Well, you're nice. I'm sorry, you're an ice cold personality. I'm just a better person. And I know you're an ice cold badass, and I'm a little pussy dormant. But I did. You're right. You're right. You're right, Jacob. I'm wrong in this situation. But he I did. You're right. You're right, Jacob.

I'm wrong in this situation, but he called me. I definitely wouldn't invite a guy to stay over that I think I might need to have a gun when I take a shower. Dude, it just started getting more and more shaped because I was like, yeah, you can come over and like, yeah, he called me. He got my number. This is before texting or whatever. Because if you were to text me, I just wanted to answer. And he called and I was like, what is this five-two-oh number? And I pick up and he's like, hey man, well, I really love it man. It'd be really, really, really help me

if I could just stay there tonight. If I could just stay there tonight and then like tomorrow, I can put a book, I got a friend or whatever. And then I started like adding things up and I was like, oh yeah, he always bikes to work. And like, there's all this stuff. And then he... He's always hanging one of his two shirts to dry in the kitchen.

He always rubs his hand and makes soup on the stove. Yeah. He's always eating a hot dog off of a wooden stick that he sharpened that he just made over a trash can fire. He's always got that knapsack that's attached to a stick. Wait a second. This guy's a hobo. He jumps off a train to work every day. That guy whistles at the sight of anything silver or gold. He's constantly whistling and knee-slapping to she'll be coming around the mountain. He always looks up to the air conditioning vans and goes, central cooling.

What do you know? So he, I, I'm like, yeah, dude. He keeps telling me about the protein count of bugs. I know a beetle's actually like as much protein as a steak. So he, I'm like, yeah, you could stay with me. And I lived near the campus and he like biked over. Of course he did. I bet that smelled great.

I think I still have my sense of smell at this time. So probably no. Oh, no, maybe that's what killed it. Yeah. And then he, I just, no, I do it. It was just me being a pussy. It's not me being a good person. It's me being scared to be like, no, fuck you go on the street, you know,

wish I had more of that sometimes, but this guy stayed with me. Damn, and I knew it was crazy because I went to my friend's house to buy weed. I was like, I'm gonna go buy weed. So this co-opie here, looking your cabinet knobs. He goes, who's this lady, your mom? I'm gonna take care of this one real quick. Ooh, hey, how about this this lady your mom? I'm gonna take care of this one real quick. Oh Hey, how about this picture your mom? For what I like a I didn't have like a laptop I didn't have a lot of things of value. I think my most valuable thing was like a PlayStation gun

He didn't know I had to gun and then he keeps that quiet. Yeah, you keep that very quiet You have to put it in the back of your pants No, but when I got robbed I put it in the front of my pants Yeah, and that's when I raised my arms and the guy saw it and took it off me. Oh, no, yeah I'm sorry Dan. I did you say what kind of gun was it? It was a nine millimeter Just like no, it was like a Actually, I could I could text Jersey Mike. It might have been a 45 Actually, I could text Jersey Mike. It might have been a 45. It might have been a Ruger 45. Dude, that'll take your head clean off.

Because he gave me a- he had a Ruger 45 that was really nice and then Amir had a busted-ass 9mm. That was just- I- I could be wrong about that. It's so crazy you just lived amongst all these guys rocking guns. He has a big gun state, dude. Yeah? And I'll be blowing the roof off this Thursday Saturday at stand-up live in Phoenix So he when we got robbed in a mirror left or whatever the guy took that's what it was the guy took a mirror's gun So we didn't have the gun and then I remember I told you out to test my gun and obviously if you listen to Thursday's story

You can hear what we're talking about Thursday's episode of the Bonfire when I got scared remember when I told you I went back to my apartment in the door was open everything I freaked out and I was like I can't fucking sleep like I'm and my friend Jersey Mike gave me his gun Which was a Ruger 45 and then I just had it so I had it when I moved into my new apartment take my peace Yeah, and then I when I moved into my new apartment. Take my piece. Yeah. And then I, when I moved into my new apartment, I still had the gun and that's when this guy stayed with me. And I came back from getting weed. And I just remember I walked into my bathroom

and he had taken a shower and it was just like dirt up on the tub in a way where I was like, damn dude, how long you been sleeping outside? Should have shot this motherfucker. Dude, I immediately saw that. I was like, dude how long you been sleeping outside? I should have shot the smother fucker dude. I immediately saw that was like oh No, that was the boat. He was left that dirt there. No, no when he when I walked to the bathroom He's like I'm gonna clean that bath up, you know Yeah, I was like damn dude you were covered in filth you should have put two in them, dude That's why can't carry a gun because you're grounds for two in you. Damn, dude. Jay, you're just being a cold killer.

And then when I walk by you, I casually shoot you one last time in the head to make sure. But it's like those first two were point blank to the chest, but it's hot in Arizona. So it's like, I took a shower at night. And so, but I, this is after I've learned of all this. I'm like, I think this dude's straight up almost to stay in the house. Yeah. So then the bathroom, the apartment was real, it was built in like 1915, so there weren't like,

the locks were chain lock. It's just like a flimsy chain lock. Yeah, the little hook thing. Yeah, hook. This is all it was. A hook in a little, like to, when you shut the bathroom door and then you hook it over and get a little ring.

Yeah. And so I was like, I don't, this guy gets fucking ripped this off. Homeless strike. Yeah, this guy lives on the street. He's just got a pounds lighter after that bath. This guy's going to bed with one eye open, waiting for a have a Lena to strike him.

Just a wild boar. Better bring the rooger with you. So I put that dead and I put it under like, I had my towel, my t-shirt, and then I hit the gun, and then but it was right outside the fucking shower in case that door opened, I was like, you, I would would you I would have killed such a part of you wanted so bad now I was scared for the fuck it mix it up with this guy No way dude because he would have came in it's up you know what he would have done I just know he would have grabbed that he would have grabbed the fucking barrel of the gun and I'd be like

Making noises like that you did nothing Nothing happened no I'm saying nothing happened By the way, you know how guilty you feel when you have to sneak your gun back into your room. Yeah, you know, right guys Like hey man, I went ahead and did the dishes. Did he really he cleaned all my dishes? Well, I got out of the shower. That's fucking He goes hey man, I'm air drying all those dishes and I was like you a cool thrown up in the air send it The dishes are done man But yeah, that's when I fell back so I was like I almost put fucking a 45 through you I got you know I was put to holes in you like you were the two one hell you almost switch cheese your ass up any

Who thanks for doing the dishes? I guess And then he tried to get a second the next day try to get a second night. I shut it. I think you had the fucking pull the guy. Yeah, I like that We agreed the one day we agreed to one fucking day. Okay, let's not get nuts. I go I need you you grab your back grab your bag You know, I know nothing happens. I'm saying when nothing happened Get out of here. You know, I know nothing happens. So I'm saying when nothing happened, before nothing happened, you know, before the time of your word,

you didn't, did you ever do any drama with this gun? And by that, I mean, like, because I would, have you done things where you like held it up and like took a gulp or something and just like hold the, you know what I mean? Like really hold it in your hands, like by a door. Oh, I took it to a range. After Mike let me borrow it. We went to talk about shooting it.

I'm talking about the house, it's the plan of whatever, like walking around with it in your hand, like the power of it. Just being dramatic sort of. Am I doing a bad description? No, I can't what you mean. I'd be playing PlayStation 2 with the controller on my leg, holding the gun, going, first you get the money,

then you get the power, then you get the respect. Maybe it almost just things like spinning it on a fucking a table and then grabbing it. First you get the money, then you get the power, then you get the respect. Maybe it almost just thinks like spinning it on a fucking a table and then grabbing it, holding up. The thing holding up like this is a big thing. I mean, when you would pick it up, when you would pick it up, you would be like, oh shit, yeah.

But I would, but I wasn't like walking around my apartment like, yeah, I would have, what have what I would have done that completely. I was saying I that's what I'm asking like, did you ever like, I would have definitely thought about pulling it out of the back of my belt. So when the wind had been a big one, that guy Paul, yeah, the threat to kill his dog, always had a gun on him. And he he would have done it.

He came to a mirror and eyes apartment one time to buy weed off a mirror. And put his gun down. And a mirror was like, yeah, can I hold your gun? And I was like, I don't want a mirror. Hold little of a gun. And he, and Paul took the, you know, the clip out or whatever didn't check the chamber. God. And a mirror is holding this gun and a mirror's an idiot. Yeah, and he's like, yeah, I was out of it I look at this gun and he's like pointing it at his fish tank. I go don't point that anywhere near me Like I'm not even playing around the mirror You know, that's like when you get dorky, but I was serious. I was like don't fucking hear that

This is the game. I don't play you get serious voice. We go. I have hold on hold on. Hey do not that near me. I don't play any video game right now. It's we're talking Seriously, that's enough. I go put that down and he put the gun down and I pulled the slot and I bullet came out Wow, there was just one in there was one I was like So cool when they did that though You like I went me I pop up in the air and you snagged it. It wasn't, can I tell you something? I wasn't even feeling cool because I was spaszing out so hard. I was going, don't fucking point that around. And I was like, almost like,

eh, like that kind of voice, that when I did it, and I did it and you locked this, and you go, there was a fucking bullet in there. It wasn't even like, yeah, you fucking piece of shit. I was more like, air, what are you doing? To in my life, I've, especially like young or teenagers or late teens or any of that, that I'd never like, I don't think even, I mean, outside of like ranges

and stuff like that that I've gone to with some people, like never just in the field really like held a gun or anything. I mean, I don't know shit about guns, but I just have I've like ban or living in Arizona. Nick, Nick, my step that Nick and his dad had a like guns like his well, step grandpa had a lot of guns. So no one I know had guns at all. And the only interaction with a gun. Yeah.

We had I think I said this in the show before, it's so funny and very telling of me, you know there's a bunch of us. Bless you. Me and I think it was Randy Hanken, his, that's a great legal name. Oh, Randy Hanken. Randy Hanken's dad, we were going through his drawer,

I think, and we found, he had a gun, I think Randy knew he had a gun or something. That's an after-school special, or what have you dies. Of course. But this is what saved, this is why, why am I dirty comic? Just trying to be the answer. A dildo with a mercant on it.

Not a dildo. Not a dildo at all. We were in his dad's drawer. We found, the gun wasn't in hand for 10 seconds before we go, what is this? And it was like a fake pussy with a vibrating thing. Yeah. The gun went back in the drawer, then we all decided who's going to go first

with this thing. And you found his dad side piece. Yeah. I think only one of us used it. You found this. Realize how gross would be to use you know, I mean, like we were all down to use it. And then when one came out, what did you remember who it was? We were just like, Oh, now in one. Yeah. I'm not going to use that. who it was, we were just like, oh, now. And one fall, yeah. I'm not gonna use that now. In one fall swoop, you found a side arm inside piece.

Yeah. And what in the same drawer? It was so shoddy and terrible. Like, I remember the little glued on hairs on it. Oh, a little tough to put. Yeah, to make it, but I ain't gonna, a tough to like above it. It like was, they put a hair all around it.

You wanna talk about, you to talk about technology advancements. Think about fake pussies in the early 80s versus now. I want to know what the material of a real doll was used for initially. It's going to be something really upsetting to the world. It was used to make heart valves, but also you can fuck it. But also someone said it felt a little like a pussy

Yeah, I Asked in a question sure perfect. Well, first of all, I got to say that is one of the greatest himbo characteristics Guys that will just wave a gun in a room Check this out. Yeah, dude. He really he really was Accaid he even Paul who was buying drugs from him had to give him parent energy. I'll be like, whoa, I did. Well, because I'm here.

I was like, yeah, look at this guy. It's, you know, the original, the original lead singer, the original lead singer of Chicago. Is that a thank God? Kill themselves so we could have the sweet songs of Peter Citer. I should have. What's Tara? But Terry, what was his last name? Terry fucking fuck.

We've looked this up before. Yeah, but he should know this. But he for sure. Was he was playing around in Charlottesville himself? I was like fucking around with his gun and his friend was like Terry Cath. They were like, uh, dude, don't. He was like, stop playing around. He goes, stop waving it around. He goes it's not loaded idiot ass hole

and then held it to his head and blew his fucking head off. Geez, damn. Because it was the fact loaded. Yeah, and I mean the way, you know, Amir's energy was, I told you he'd get like that like it's out of agada. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, like, yeah, I didn't even fucking shoot anybody. He did that thing where he was. You did miss the up. That was the best option in the world, though, to click it as the thing goes up in the air and then grab the bullet with your hand and you go.

And you hold to him, you like this and you go, this isn't a toy. Huh? This is an instrument. Right there. Right there, that change. This would have just changed both of our lives right now. You would have had to call Patricia herself

and scoop my brains. Yeah, dish, sorry. Yeah, Trish, you might my brains. Yeah, this sorry. Yeah, Trish, you might want to sit down for this one. Yeah, it turns out your son's head explodes like a lot of water. One bullet and he was fucking completely going. You know, not for nothing. This isn't even that big of a hand cannon. There's a lot of gas spilled up in that thing.

Yeah, your son was mostly air. We think had a gerbil brain. Oh, my God. What I wanted to ask though is like, you keep saying my friend let me borrow a gun. Yeah, that's not a thing. Yeah, it sounds like breaking bad. Like this was under the table. Yeah, I'll give you your gun back in a week.

Yeah, that's exactly what it was. It was like, his gun wasn't legal. No, he bought it legally. There a week. Yeah, that's exactly what it was. It was like his gun wasn't legal. No, he bought it legally. There was legal. Yeah, you can't just lend people a good, that's illegal. Well, I don't know, we did it. I don't know, he gave me a gun. It gave me a gun for a gun. You mentioned it came back. If it came back to his serial number, could you fucking put two inside that fucking home with dude? So that's what, like what we called, when we got when we got robbed, a mirror's gun was registered to him. You would have had to dig the bullets out, dude. Of what?

You feel that homeless guy, that's just like the bullets out? No, I wouldn't have, no one's missing him. He's homeless. I just put him in the room. Doesn't matter dude, there's a lot of forensic on those fucking things. It's coming back to your friend Paul.

No, Mike, it was the one, Jersey Mike. Jersey Mike. It was the one. Jersey Mike. It was one of the, let me borrow the gun. Right. But number one, a lot of desert out there. Number two, you get a shovel and some American elbow grease. Mm-hmm. Who's bringing this elbow grease?

Cause Dan, I'll challenge you right now to a desert shovel dig. I'll do it. And you tell me how fast you think you can get body length deep. You can't, you can't do it at night. Cause the job's cool. It's not a fucking chance in hell that I would think I could dig into. At 21? Who's got a joke about that?

Right now. Someone's got a really good joke about it. Digging a hole? Yeah. You were talking to dig a fucking hole? Yeah, someone's got a really funny joke about it. It's the most impossible thing in the world. Ah, damn it.

Who was it? I don't know. Really made me laugh. Yeah, it's a good joke. Fuck. What's that, Jacob? Well, it's just bringing up an embarrassing moment I had. This was on the bonfire. I'm like mortified at my lack of gun safety skills

when I initially got my 22 rifle. Yeah. The Henry rifle. And I, you know, I was, you've seen it, we posted it. And I have my finger on the trigger, like an asshole. And, you know, gun rule is never put your finger on the trigger unless you're ready to fire it and never pointed anywhere. You don't want it to hit. And I broke every one of those rules. Oh, when you posted the picture of your rifle. Yeah. But man, when you're a Hymbo, it's all good.

Yeah, when you're a Hymbo, I'm surprised you didn't try to put it in his pajama bottoms with no shirt on. Like, remember when Plexico Burris shot his own leg? Yes. Because he put it in sweatpants. Yeah. He's a Hymbo. That's a Hymbo.

Plexico Burris is a Hymbo. Yeah, it's a Hymbo move. Oh, that a doubt. You put a fucking loaded gun a himbo. Yeah, it's a himbo move. Oh, that adult. You put a fucking loaded gun in sweatpants that's held up by a drawstring? First of all, I really don't get this, I mean, I get what they're saying. Celebrities like carrying guns. That's really stupid. You should just hire security.

Have someone that can legally carry the gun. Yeah. Like it's so weird. Like off-duty police officers to like fucking Be your security or something. It's so stupid like like what are you gonna do? Are you really like a a gun toading dude? Honestly, I wasn't even and just because I had it was right after the robbery so things were like you always keep it No, I'm just length case you got to put a man down. I sleep on the floor on a, I don't even need a pillow like Stallone and assassins.

So a couple of things that I just got reiterated just made me remember about Dan today was one that he's a a gun carrying America is not afraid to fucking drop a dude if you come sideways in his apartment. It's second should be first for a lot of folks. And then two is this guy, Dan Soder. While nothing about him when I describe as like hip hoppy in any way or anything, it's a lot of white, a lot of white on Dan. I'm very white, Lily White. Lily White and the ladies,

the ladies of color love Dan Soder. I mean, they really the the meanest ones up front and ice to them downstairs, they fawn. They fawn. Oh, we just talk different coffee spots. We got to. Yeah. And the colored girls go Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan So stoned this weekend and got Katie so mad by going Joe joke No They've never been she got mad and I went haha joke joke jokes jokes Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Golden Dazzle Hills, original, voice He was very stone-dead Oh, she's like just don't fucking do it then I got the shower doing it Mmm, joke, joke

I don't want to fan him with the opera with my girlfriend Like, I came upstairs from walking the dog and they just decided they were only gonna speak to me in Fan him with the opera music Were you mad you didn't get to go to that? I know how much you love Phantom of the opera No, I do love family opera. I would have seen Phantom of the opera again. She goes a class It was so cool that like costumes and the set design and it was amazing. I'd never seen it live before. I've gone to a Broadway show really high. Christine's never taken me anywhere. I take her everywhere. Damn. She never just showed up and been like, this is Jay singing out the window.

And then Christine's behind you with a mask on. He's a skinny. Great, interestingness, half a remake. He's me. Oh, different parts. Up and in the defense. Jay would have loved it. Christine pull your head out of your ass. Damn, let's go to the fair with the opera this winter. With the opera, Christine. No's go to the favorite of the opera this winter. With Al Christine.

No, she can't do it. We gotta go to the Jimmy Buffett restaurant when Jacob gets back. Yeah, we have to go to Margarita, though. I say we go see Book of Mormon. It's awesome. Oh, you've seen it? Yeah.

Oh, you saw it? Yeah, I'll go see it again, though, for sure. I really want to see it. You know me, big tray Parker Matt Stone guy. Yeah. They just did the 25th anniversary concert. I haven't watched it. I will say I think I don't think I'm going to love Book of Mormon.

Yeah, you will. You think? Yeah, there's four different songs that I know you'll like. Because I watched them do one on the Tonys. Yeah. And it's lost for me a lot. I'm telling you, it's all how they set it up. From the second, I was unsure about it.

What was the very, what was the something that it was like the opening song, probably, that they played on the Tonys one year, but it was so boring. It was like the, all the guys standing in like a line singing. Well, they do like the, we are Mohammed Men. Yeah, they do like the Mormon one,

but the funny songs are like, fuck, I forget how it goes with the African language. And he's like, what does that mean? He said, me and heavy goes, fuck you God, co-ed. And then I have to sing that it's really good. Oh, so I don't know. Dude, let's go.

Yeah, I think you'd really like it. I wasn't sure how I was gonna feel about it. And obviously they were my favorite guys. So I was nervous feel about it and obviously they're my favorite guys. So I was nervous and then The way they opened it up with the trumpet on the top the Mormon trumpet thing and it was a triparker I loved it. Oh really? That's awesome. I love it. I love it. It better times for Ricky Martin No, Parker was in the show you saw now you see his voice at the beginning It's like

And then they give an announcement and then the show opens but it's him up top and that I'm just such a sucker that I was like Oh, hell yeah, I'm a mark, you know It's like, t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t- You know that Jesus You really like it You can read all about it. I was surprised how much I loved Hamilton I watched the Disney plus version and I know that it's like the biggest show of the century by just like And I know it's gonna like it that much what Hamilton. Oh, yeah, I have no interest in Hamilton I like you like book a Mormon. I want to check out Avenue Q. Have you cuse fun? Do you want to see Lion King? I want to see Lion King. I want to see wicked. I want to see Chicago. You guys just do a run, dude Go be proud. Do anything go be Broadway babies. There's things I would absolutely see you haven't taken any You've never just got something for me us to go to that's be nice that I like You guys go good dinner ESPN zone

You guys should go get dinner ESPN zone Sitting a big base wall on a threesome there Is your Broadway play Christine's never bought wall wall wall wall wall I was gonna buy the rage tickets and you told me to let you do it Yeah, that's true. I mean I'll pay for it in some way eventually anyway You like taking care of me. It's fun for me. I've never said that, but she tells me that all the time. She's really like a big strong man. She's really like really enjoying taking care of me. It's crazy how much you enjoy that I can't do. I didn't realize the psychological manipulation that was

happening right under my nose. Oh, yeah. Jay, I love when you treat me like your little baby and you're my big strong man. Okay. I've said, we've argue before I go, I take care of the baby because what are you talking about? You pay for nothing. I take care of a baby. I take and she's like, I go, you take care of me like a wife. And then, uh, and then she has to ultimately admit it. Because I'm a baby. I'm a baby. I love the bottle. Baby. Baby went to the first. When I on tick-tock it might for you feed was oddly a lot of like daddy

Don't I Think it was saying out loud a bunch I'm not gonna go down to the library remember the one with the full-time baby girl. Yeah Yeah, yeah, what was it my strange romance or whatever something like that big love or some shit? It was disgusting That bruised up freckly bitch that was like it is I remember they got man at a store for being like can you guys leave the go? Oh, I'm so I can't change an adult woman's diaper in the middle of a fucking bookstore It's all cuz of you. This is why we stay home

It's all cuz you got us to watch love after lock up and then that came on as a commercial and I was like this It's fucking nuts modern love to love after lock up and then that came on as a commercial and I was like this shit's fucking nuts modern love to love it to lock up brings you All kinds of it's back. It's back. I just I don't care anymore It's true stream love extreme love was it I'm a full-time baby girl Just you know the girl who was with burger lit is now all wrapped up with deonte the guy who dishwashers his fucking fuck toys all wrapped up with Deonte, the guy who dishwashers his fucking fuck toys. Wait, the one that got completely rolled over by the other girl? Yes. Wait, hold on.

So the meth cell in Hathi that lived in the house with burger lip is they went back to jail for carving up his fucking desk and fucking shit out. Shout out. And then got out and started dating spineless Deonte who caught that girl With the other guy and the first episode was them like meeting in person for the first time and they're being all it but she's telling him What she's done And he's like not prepared for this like the other girl which is all like bullshit like selling drugs and like I know what I was like. This girl's like,

I'm a little piece of pussy, you're a guy with a guy in your own trouble. This girl's buddy who was talking to Deonte with her was like, ah, she's the most ruthless girl I know, man, he goes, she's not have any problem in flicking bodily harm on people. She does not like, and she was kind of like, whatever.

And then he goes, ah, what does that mean? Like, have you ever like stabbed anybody before and she goes, do you really want to know the answer to that question? She is. And then he's like, okay.

And then it shows his confession of like, whoa, I may bid off with it, I can too. And Deontay for those of you who don't know, who have never followed the love after lock-up session, he's just a sweet boy. It's a little bonfire context. He's a sweet boy that just wants a bad bitch. He just wants bad bitch and this guy and he just gets these women these bad bitches that just walk right over him Dan in this conversation with her buddy and her and Deontay. This is a crossover. This is Marvel

I got a cross over. Yeah, this is DC Marvel. Yeah, it's crazy. You know, you know, Marvel capcom You know, it's he captain America and Superman in the same fucking shot, but now you are and while they're talking to the guy too They were like so you love her now. Are you like you're ready to move down here like just for her, you know her daughter's here and her life's here So I got he goes Yeah, I mean her daughter should come with her, but you know, I should, you know, she probably should be not here anyway, you know, she keeps saying she wants to get out of here and it's far for me, you know, and like I kind of have like a whole business and a career up there that I'm doing. I make money and doing whatever you so I'd like her to come up there.

That I spend on women who are criminals to do with a daughter with me and then she's made a face at them and he goes, but for you, I will move down here to Missouri. Jesus Christ. I was just like, yeah, play them talking. Oh, man, that girl just, I remember that girl walked all over. Damn, this guy just gets and his mom hates all of them. Yes. His mom's like, stop it.

She knows he's touched. That's what black people call it. This boy's touched. That's what is he's not retarded. He's touched. That's what black people call it. This boy's touched. That's what is he's not retarded He's slow. He's genuinely. Do you remember that girl's a good dumb person? He's a High-functioning forest gump. Yeah, it was what he is. Remember when he got that lap dance and he was like Can we have sex and she's like by me fake tits first and he went okay? And he goes oh he got on his knees I started walking around and he said, come on, baby, please. And then she would just like dip out and go get railed

by somebody else. I'm gonna play. I'm Deati. You may know me as the chef sucker from the past couple seasons of life after La Cah, with the, with the blind girl Nicole, you never heard right.. I'm Lindsay I'm the one that keeps going to prison. I was with Scott the guy with the big lip and scrapped his into his desk. Damn dude what the fuck. I mean this is like Godzilla Kong this is crazy. These are people you're like I'm genuinely excited to go home

until Katie about this to be like why you're not gonna believe who's together. I'm like two episodes into the season. Hold me to him. Thank you, man. And Dan, I'm telling you, it's juicy so far. It's juicy. The guy, you know the guy with the six kids? Yeah.

Is Nado his second and she's pregnant and they're getting married and the destiny girl is coming the fuck the wedding up Wait, he's engaged to another girl Not the crazy crazy one that he had the whole shit with you watch that Yeah, she didn't want remember when she didn't want him talking to his babies mom is yes, yeah that girl What happened the baby's mom is she ever be like fuck you know, she's still like like fuck you and your nitty-ditch and she goes I'm coming to your wedding. The baby's mom's coming to the wedding. Also that girl, it's so great too, they go.

She's, you know, I should go fuck his wedding up. And her friend was like, how would you possibly do that? She was like, I've spent 14 years in jail for fraud doing this blah, blah, blah, I didn't even think everything. She was like, I'll find that. And the way she does it Is so interesting she goes on Facebook and like or whatever finds her the wife and it's like

Getting as I can't wait for the big day. It was so fast It was like she was I get to say I do in five days and then she's saying it from the hall where she's like doing the You know booking the hall I guess and it just sees in the background the name of the hall, and she goes, all right, so we know where it's at and when it is. And like, let's go fuck it up. That's what's coming up. Hell yeah.

No. I don't know what happened to Michael though. Remember Michael and Sarah, I really liked them. You liked them? Yeah. Put that crazy bitch back in the pen, dude. Well, play this clip still because he is the same exact, he's so nervous now of her life.

She's... She's evil. She's like a sort of fireball like so she'll pay off maybe. Yeah. Her daughter, her thing with a daughter, she was like half crying about her daughter and then being like, she goes, yeah, I'm jumping right back in and then she keeps going back to jail. Like, you don't give a fuck about this kid. This kid's a teenager now.

Damn. I feel like I grew up with this kid. Yeah, you did fuck a little bit of grace is that an air yeah don't you remember burger lip built or a shitty room in the garage by the way that's a that's a theme going on on this season of this there's a guy who's dating twin this is funny there's a guy who's dating a twin okay yeah Lou twins, as we all know, are fucking pretty weird. And these girls also live together with the, and the guy gets out of jail and gets with this girl.

This guy is salt of the earth. Good dude. He's trying. He's taking on these three kids that aren't his. No, no, I'm telling you, and his wife's all right. She's fine. She's sweet enough, but she's a twin and the other twin is like a Drug problem all the internet a jail thing to but she's been living there for a while and then he came back and it's like all right

You know, she's not to move out but like let me make her. Let me show you. I'm gonna make her a Fucking like a room in that garage That's gonna be like unbelievable and he puts all this work into it, it dude and when it shows up it's a fucking garage with a couple panels uh an air conditioner and it's just like a couch on concrete. Love it. They throw what you work on. They throw a blanket over a fat ass and he goes off to a daddy daughter dance for the girls.

The next day relapses back in fucking rehab. Oh no shit. Oh, dude. Oh yeah no, she owed it. Oh, yeah, they had a narcanner. They had a narcanner and the kids were there. Back to life, because he put her in a garage. He said everybody could have gone back to jail. Like, he could have gone back to jail.

She could have lost the kids. He got the sister of me. That's where you lose me on this show. It's like, it's one of those things where... No, no, Dan, Dan, I know what I'm saying, but it's funny. No, no, I know I'm saying it's someone owe it to you in front of the kids, but no, it's funny. You'll see love after lockups like one of those things We eat one and you're like oh, this is pretty good. I'll have two more and then you had it's McDonald's

Now here's what you eat it and you're like oh, I that's good But I'm still gonna have a fly-off fish as well. I'm gonna eat the fly-off fish. I'm like I feel sick No, you won't there. Here's what you gotta learn how to do this. And this is what me and Christine do. They're brilliant in the sense that every episode now is, it's two hours of TV, but whatever, an hour and no. Yeah, it's about an hour and 45 minutes of show. Every week, the episodes, you DVR it. You find out in the first two episodes,

as you can see everybody, takes two episodes to show you every couple. In two episodes, you see who you care about and don't care about. I go through stories, me and Christine sink through in about 45 minutes, it's fun watch. Just for me, I think the thing is I don't think I can come back, but I think seeing this kind of update is fun to check in with. Sure. Well, let's check in. Because this woman had a kid with cell math. He's like, I'm a, I'm the dummy from the season. He just said that. Yeah. He's like, I'm the one that can't stop going to

prison. Who do I'm the one who don't love my kid enough to not sell math? I'm the one. If you fall asleep around, I'll take whatever you got on. If you, if you shut your eyes around me, I'm taking your watch. Bidges like this or why Dan Pax, he step on up on him in the shower. Catch a slug to the chest. He dries up. Dan still has a false tile in his show. He's a ruder.

He can't do it. Dude, Katie got it pulled on her one time, sneaking up on me. Click that. Oh, thank God. I thought you were Eskivar. Yo, you're like, damn, you sneak on me. Click that. Oh, thank God. Click that. I thought you were Eskivar. Yo, you're like, damn, you sneak on me again like that, Kath, it's Rockabob, baby. Yeah.

Ha ha. I'll be giving you a eulogy. That push-up respectfully. Respect. How we end up on this guy? It's a gun. I had someone send me a message on social media. He responded back instantly.

You damn right. I was smitten. We clicked really fast. We were friends at first and then you just kind of... You kind of worked. Turned into more. I'm out. You lying.

We started talking when I was incarcerated. Of course. I was just kind of going through my DMs And I see simply Lindsey I was like oh snap. I know that is and I don't What's going on? And What they Did she really just isn't even hiding it where she's like yeah, I knew he was a sucker

Yeah, I was in prison and I was like I probably play that this guy will get her a month They're gonna ask him for money next episode. It's coming her and her friends are gonna seem so like giddy and happy with them. And it's real. Yeah. She could face that with burger lift. You can do it. This guy. Yeah. She was excited about burger lift. Yeah. 100%. She did. She jumped in his arms and did the whole thing.

Squeaked. She knew it because she was at the time. She believed she was getting a really nice house. But this guy sold that he's got a lot of money. And what he had was some money. He had some money and two dogs walking around in the empty house. Yeah, he had some money and just got like a house but he couldn't really afford to like furnish it. So he was like a, just like a moderately decent rancher house.

Like nothing to it really. Yeah, it was all right. It was fine and she was like, what the fuck? And there was only like one bedroom in it Yeah, so then he built her a bedroom a bedroom for the kid in the garage She was all like PVC pipes run through and she Nothing more white trash than a bedroom in a garage. Oh for sure give me a little more give me some more The easy she just got this Mississippi Twain.

You made it sound like I was coming home to Disney World. You promised me Disney, Ryan. I came home to the California Bay. The accident turns me home. Get me all that. Remember, every time you pushed me, I'm gonna push back 10 times harder. Don't you forget it.

You've done this type of stuff right here. What's your motive? But there's just some sexy, er, a lot of life in here. I'm not. Yeah, it's actually frustrating me in is this some sexy, erotic life or something? Mother's not heart milk. Yeah, it's actually frustrating me annoying looking. Yeah, what?

Like, what do you... Because that's the headwag of I'm right and you're wrong. Damn dude, her kid is straight up a fucking teenager. And you remember, the other thing she was like a little kid. She's like a little girl. Oh damn, this is sad. My kid's playing basketball, she's fine. She's got skill.

I want to keep telling my story because I had a lot of personal growth this season. And I feel like it's good for other prisoners to see that their positive outcomes. She's literally hanging with her old meth crew currently in the show. Good play, I'm sorry. Takes a lot of ups and downs to get their way and a lot of unfortunate events, but sometimes you know what, it's for the best. Worst people, what are you implying? Well, you know, you're not exactly a sender real

with there, you know. What? You ain't exactly a prince. All right, fuck you, go back to jail, you slut. You see a lot of us, a new sign of us, all of us. Both good and bad. For better and worse. What if this is my part, send an off-and-trade?

Oh, they have spanked him. Runs him off. What is this? What are you doing with you? You want some of this? Aw, man. That just got me old goose stuff. Are you ready, aren't you?

What's your next episode? Friday, every Friday night. Damn, did you guys really got a point to tell if there's no watch people completely crumble? What we watch it on Sundays when I come home. The Lord's Day. The Lord's Day. Lord Resteth.

We had two episodes when Jay came home this last week. I'm gonna take our first break. Yeah, damn look. I have the Michelle branch stuff up too. Oh yeah, we'll talk about Black E's drummer Patrick Carney. Who's Dickie. And Michelle Branch breaking up. Jacob, you finally got your shot.

What? Oh, am I actually up? Here. For what? I'm sorry, I forget I have to compete with the YouTube I'm on the same line as YouTube when I'm down here. Oh, yeah. Yeah, you can't talk me fucking nuts I've had a conversation what you and realize. Oh nobody's hearing me Five you're watching some idiot fall over the jailbird you're on a voluntary zoom

You can't be that's what you're not talking at the same time as you to playing anyway yeah when you hear the youtube shut it up you know you're over see you are playing some musical and i had a point it's it's a doesn't matter we know what is your point we're talking about musicals we're talking about family opera or we're talking about book a more man i was defending jay but now it doesn't matter damn Damn Jay. You lost your ally. I didn't fuck them over.

Christine listed three musicals in a row that she wanted to see and said see you'd never want to do anything. It's insane to me that you said that was oh your laughing. It was funny I had that locked and loaded 20 minutes ago Dude I love Florida Jacob Yeah, it's a diver mode. Yeah, it's really a fucking plummet to this. That's fucking Jacob with a knife in his ankle Florida does not want to do anything But yeah, you name three musicals that you know is stupid to say yeah I don't want to do anything and what have you tried to do with me? You're like, hey, I'm taking you to this. Did I've been like, no, nothing. Yeah, take a shot of it. You know, go get fucking,

you got family operative tickets recently. Yeah, that's the judgment. Jay doesn't want to go to three excruciatingly long musicals. They're not excruciatingly long and they're all great. Is it over five minutes? Yeah, over five minutes of music. I don't want to hear. Yeah, I don't want to see wicked. You're right. I don't want to see that. What were the three that you listed wicked? Lion King, Chicago. Yeah, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I don't want to go see Rocky Balboa. She didn't even think the take rate.

What about Greece when it comes back? In every percentage. In every percentage. In every percentage. In every percentage. If she loved me right, she'd buy me tickets and tell me to take my friend DJ Loo. Or get three tickets, invite a gentleman in.

Ooh, by the name of Dan Soder. No, Loo. See you guys can go, you guys go see Greece. As a three-way? You, now. You're seeing a Lou. No, I want a fucking hand job with Lou. Oh my God, you guys, we're just,

he's gonna be in the way. Can you guys dress up like T-birds? Bones, you, hey, Jeff. You actually, I don't love Greece. Bones, you don't love, like, we do. I love it more than you. You don't. I mean, not as much as Lou, but more than you. You love Greece more than you. You don't. I mean, not as much as Lill, but more than you.

You love Grease. You love Grease more than Jay. Yeah. Did I tell you what we're going to do? Bet you know that movie. Oh, shut. You know, better than you do. Shut both of your mouths.

What you guys are going to do is we're going to break. OK. You're going to leave the studio. And we're coming back with Grease trivia. Yeah. Drawn up by DJ Lill. No, no, there's Grease trivia on a site. Sure.

Well, he's going gonna help facilitate the questions. Jay's autistic. He's gonna know it all. You know what I thought you'd say you know what better than me. I could like it more. I said I bet I know grease inside not better than you and you said nope. Way to kill the bit.

Let's see. Good improv, Christine. Now, now I'll probably win. Way to build spirit and competition and excitement for the contest, Christine. Oh, wait, look at the contest. This is a runaway. No. This is going to be a first round knockout.

I don't know if I can be Christine in a foot race. I just say confidently that I will dust her ass and I probably will But if I don't then it's funny. That's called leaning into the bit there misperformer over here. Guess what we're gonna teach you that in Shakespeare We're coming back with a five-question Greece trivia J. Versus Ten questions maybe it's fucking 25. It's the rest of the show. Hey, I'm John He's doing it What's that Jacob? Yeah, yeah, it is Jacob. Jacob versus YouTube. Most of the time it's YouTube. He main videos Huh, he's saying you watch too many videos. We've got this for sure. We're so weak. No, no, I'm saying Well, I am saying that but you're it's mainly that I'm on the same fucking line and I can't so yeah

Nobody's hearing anything Florida I would just Send well, I'm not in Florida. I Couldn't hear you, Christine. Exactly. You could hear if you were here in the studio and not in Florida. I love being in the studio. I hate every other aspect of being there. I know.

You know what happened to me when I, the night before I left for Florida? Or rat kissed you on the mouth? Good. It was a fucking horror show. I'm packing to leave. And I see a cockroach in my bedroom crawling all over. Now I had to skim through all my clothes and pack it away. Then I slept on the couch because the cockroach had taken over my bedroom. You didn't get it. But I said

I couldn't get it. I sprayed a can of that shit all over the floor and he looked up like thanks for the shower but it will fuck off all the shit right and i went downstairs to throw my garbage out which is what i always do before i leave and uh... open the and i made the mistake i knew it was late after dark

i opened up to the the garbage area rats everywhere and some dildo left his garbage on top of the can. And the get the the bag is pulsating now with life and with life inside. So now I have to carry my bag like five blocks up to of garbage up to a Steinway street to dump it in a trash can there. There's rats everywhere there. But when that's going on, we could always hear what you're saying in studio. Yeah. So look, it's much better. I enjoy being in the studio a lot. We know you do. We miss you more than anything. Oh, hand-jaw time. When you play beauty school dropout coming back?

Absolutely. If you do beauty school dropout, I'll see who knows more about Greece, Big Jared Christine. Big J. Hey! Big J. No more Christine! We'll grab that next bonfire. You've been listening to... SiriusXM's Bonfire!

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