The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Head Of The Table (feat. Joe DeRosa)

Episode Date: March 28, 2023

Who would you want at your Thanksgiving table if they had to help you in the apocalypse? Joe DeRosa and Bobby Kelly have answers.

Hey everybody, I'm Bobby Kelly. And it's Big J. Okerson. We're actually a full radio show on Series XM, not just the podcast. Hey, guess what? For full episodes of the Bond Fire, you can listen on the Series XM app. Go to seriesexm.com slash Bond Fire for a special offer. And now, the Bond Fire! Tiki! Oh my god! Oh! the bonfire

here comes the wait here comes the guitar. What's up everybody? We're back. Hope you had a good weekend. What's up everybody? We're back. Hope you had a good weekend. It's the blonde fire. Faction talk. Series XM 103, Big J. Ogerson and Robert Kelly. Big J is out.

Lou just held up a sign. Like a homeless person with the writing so big on it because old blind, blind Bob, blind and stupid Bob with a learning disability. He can't read 12 point helvetica. You're welcome. Yes, thank you very much, Larry. Appreciate you treating me like the boomer that I am. Jay is out of the studio today, and that song was dedicated to him since you've been

gone Jay, we miss you. But in studio is one of my favorite people on the planet, Joe DeRosa. Yep. Joey Rose is. Good to see you. Buddy, I'm happy to see you. I'm so happy to see you. I'm very happy to see you.

Yeah, I mean, your face doesn't express that. I've so many. Your face expresses like you just found like some type of fungus on your foot. I have so many gripes with already since I've been here with you. What do you tell? I'm so happy, dude. I'm so happy.

I know. I know. But I came in. You're giving me like pointers. I didn't give you any pointers. I've hosted the show more than you have honest Here's a problem here's a problem with you. Can I take you can I take the problem with you? Yeah, good good Tell me you just like we have this thing that we're gonna talk about I found this thing

We I can't wait to get into it with you and you just not you happen and and it's hilarious And what I'm like dude just shut up for three minutes. All right, that's fine. We're gonna be good. You're so excited today. I'm excited. Because Jay's not here. You'll be able to get a word out.

You thought I couldn't redo it. I said it all fair, I brought it back. It worked again. First of all, I don't like that. My big teddy bear, my big teddy bear is out of town right now. He's got a big couple of weeks. He's a buddy. It's promoted, he's out promoting a special.

Oh, that's great. He's got his new special dog belly and it's April 5th and it's gonna be on YouTube.com slash at big J. Okerson. So it is free and hilarious. It was produced by the great Rabbi Ari Shafir, Muscle Tuff. So make sure you check that out.

But I am excited that you're here. It's my soul Ari, okay, I'm sorry. No, you saw him this weekend. You went to his beacon, right? I went to his beacon show. This is what a psycho are he is. I'm like, dude, I'll be there Friday. I promise it's gonna be awesome. I'm just coming to hang.

Like, I can't wait to support you. I'm so excited. He's like, dude, that's great. Whatever. He got Joey Rosa sandwiches, which was very cool of him. You brought them. He, no, he ordered like a catering order. Oh, that's great. Yeah, it was very sweet. You didn't bring any here, right? very cool of them. You brought them. He, no, he ordered like a catering order. Oh, that's great.

Yeah, it was very sweet. You didn't bring any here, right? You brought a bag. You start your bringing it out? No, no, I never said that. You didn't bring sandwiches? No. I asked you if you could bring some sandwiches.

Yeah, there's this number you can call and have them delivered. What the? Oh, thanks, Lil. Just dropped a bag of Doritos. A mini trick of treats say, oh, and literally two Oreos. Oh, Oreos, single Oreos. That's great. That is horrible.

Could you imagine what I was saying? What a single wrapped Oreo in your Halloween bag. I would hit the person in my bag. No, but I go, so I'm not kidding, dude. At 6 p.m., the shows at 8 p.m., my kitchen, the pipe under my sink and my kitchen Burst and there was water all over my kitchen and I'm like oh my god And I'm like mopping it up. I'm calling the landlord. They sent somebody right over which was great

But it's a disaster like it you know you have to tend to do it me. I text him at 6.15 I go brother. I love you. I will be there But I might not make it by showtime. A pipe just burst in my kitchen, and I'm like, frantically trying to get it cleaned up, but I will see you tonight, I promise. And he goes, oh, do you wanna go on? I go, what?

Dude, the show's in like an hour. What are you talking? And he's like, yeah, I forgot to, yeah, should I ask you soon? I wanted to ask you for one to go. And I go, yeah, dude, I do want to go on, but I'm not kidding. Like the pipe, like, it's like, so I will try to get there. I think I go, I think I can be there by 815. He goes, it's plenty of time. Don't worry. And that's how he books his openers a parent. Yeah. Well, listen, I mean, it doesn't surprise me. And I went on at the beacon theater. That's great., it doesn't surprise me. And I went on at the peak in theater. That's great, but it doesn't surprise me.

I mean, the guy's done, you know, more mushrooms than most goats, I think it mushrooms. I mean, he's not, he's smart, but he's not, he's not adjusted well. No. So how was it? Was it packed?

It was awesome. It was packed. It was really, there was a lot of love in the air. He put the opening of the show was awesome. What was the opening of the show? He had like a dance troupe come out and dance and then he like appeared on stage with this spot. Like he came out and like the background was all pitch black

and he came out and they played Simon says, boom, boom, boom, boom. Get the fuck up. And a spotlight went on and he was just on stage and everybody went crazy. Wow. And then he brought out all the secret just on stage and everybody went crazy. Wow. And then he brought out all the secret openers. So he brought out list.

Then he brought out me, then he brought out shouts. At the beginning. Yeah, and he was doing time between everybody. And then he did like an hour and 10 at the end and killed. It was fucking amazing. So he put on a show. He did. Oh good for him.

If I got the beacon, I would've just went out with Scopo and Gomez. What a Kelly for Stuka. Hello. Yeah, I'm talking. Just bomb in front of me. Ha ha ha ha ha. Yeah, there would be no fanfare, no music before anybody. What kind of dance trip? Where do you get a dance trip?

I always wanted to get a dance trip. Um, one of them was, I think she's the coach of it, was Jade from The Stand, one of the managers of The Stand. Like a dance troupe, like, what do you mean? What kind of dance? Like hip hoppy, I guess? You were there, right Evans? Yeah, it was great, it was such a great show.

But Jade's dance, she did more of a sexy thing that I saw in last time down at the stand. This was more campy, I want to say, but what was it maybe like eight girls came in and did a whole routine together to... What song was it again? I think it was a shake, shake, shake, shake, shake, shake, your body, right? What was it? The Beatles you saw.

What was it like a high school, when you go to see your kid type? They were doing it. She's like... Great. She's here two dance. She moved to New York to dance. but was it like a high school, like when you go to see your kid type? No, they were like, they were like, great dancers. Great, yeah, she's here to dance. Like she moved to New York to dance. So this dance like her day job. I've known Jade for, I've known Jade for three years from the stand.

Yeah, and? I see her in a whole new light. Now that I saw her dance. It was like, I was like, oh my god, this gift you have that I had no idea. Like it was that, she was, they were that good. So now you're gonna try to have sex with her. No. Oh my god. Well, I didn't know you started a new light. Maybe, they were that good. So now you're gonna try to have sex with that. No.

Oh, all right. Jesus Christ. Well, I didn't know you started a new light. Maybe you didn't want a banger now, you want a banger to shake it. I see you in a new light. I don't want to have sex with you. Come on.

No, come on. Out loud, I don't. Yeah, exactly. By the way, here's, I made notes. First of all, if you take a sip of water on that microphone again, I'm gonna throw up. What are you talking about? It took a Mr. Radio guy, Mr. I, dude, I've been doing

everything, I've done this more than you, I'm a radio. You took a big, this is what I heard when you would do. It's coffee, it's not water. Whatever it is, it almost made me puke. It sounded like Patrice breathing in his last moments. Sorry, that was terrible, I apologize. I was just gonna make it awful joke. You you by the way you you scolded me before we started because I called you Bob and then you referred to yourself in the third person as Bob

I can do that you've never called me Bob in my life And then you were non-shallotly talking to people going yeah Bob you look like a Bob now What the fuck does that mean you look like a Bob now? I don't know how to take that you look like an actor doing the panel at the movie you look like a Janine That's not an insult you fucking psycho I feel like Bob is an insult No, it's like you got like the actory glasses on this is sounding insulting no It looks like when like when Bob De Niro sits down there,

like so Bob, what was it like on the set of Mean Streets? He called me De Niro, I'm back in. Yeah, these. I mean, I feel like something's coming though. You're writing something down, and then you just cross something. No, I'm crossing out the bits already did. The, your positive energy, you're very positive. I'm very happy right now.

I'm very happy. The family is great. I'm very happy right now. I'm very happy the family is great. I Feel fantastic the bonfire family are the personal family my personal I don't know what you meant. We think I've put the fuck I just met these guys Tuesday This guy's already holding up old age so Jacob tried to attack me last week to hold him up all the age. So Jacob tried to attack me last week. No, I do. I mean, my new bonfire family, I was excited to come in today.

I haven't seen it. I didn't, I was excited when I woke up today to come into the studio, like to see everybody. I got here, I got here an hour and a half early. I don't know why. I got here too early because Jay usually makes the, the, Hey, we'll meet out front. A Christine will say we'll meet out front. And it wasn't that because Jay's not here. Yeah. Jay's been pitching me that for years. I've never done it. Well, I usually do it. Jay's like, well, show up at four, four,

five, let's call it three, 45. Yeah. You watch me smoke six cigarettes. It'll be good. I'm like, no, I'm fine. I'll see it about five two. I like it. I mean, Jay, go to the Starbucks together. We take a little walk. It's nice. And I showed up and nobody came out. Smoking is a guy right by my and I go, I put it in the text read anyone Starbucks every year but now we're good. I was like I got money like I'm paying. There's a great uh if you've been to this place downstairs the one like in the building. I have it's very good. It's really good but it's a little it's a little too good for me. It's a little expensive it's a little foofy. It's a little foofy. You're a foofy guy. You like the foof. Sometime. In certain things I do, but not in most things I don't. Like I like dirty bars. You like disgusting women.

Like disgusting men. Yeah, I like disgusting men. You know, you're a foof guy. Even the fact that you like the dirty bar, I consider foof. No, because I liked it before it was like a thing. Listen, I'm not saying you're not the original of the fuf, but you're definitely the fuf, okay. You enter the dirty bar because it was fufy. It's like, dude, let's go to the dirty bar instead of the fuf and cool bar and then we wind up at a place with a bunch of anchor tattoo guys. No, it's... Yeah. They had a dart board.

I remember. I used to go... I like a no frills bar. It was my favorite monologue I ever wrote at the Pete Homes show when I worked there. It was... Take it easy. I don't like it. You just dropped it down.

No, I'm pissed. What I was a writer. I pitched the monologue. My favorite thing I ever pitched, I got to write it was a writer. I pitched the monologue. My favorite thing ever pitching at the right was old man bars was the monologue. It was about those bars. And my favorite joke in it was

was the people that don't get it come in. They're like, are there any games? Yeah, staring the mirror and drinking. I was just like a bar where it's like, we're here to get some work done. Yeah, you know what I mean? Yeah, there's a game? There's a game. There's a game just commit suicide in the bathroom.

Exactly. Hey, it's called GoPey on the Ice. Yes. Yes. But you don't like a nice golden tee in a bar? You don't like golden tee? Golden tee is an acceptable bar arcade game. So what are the best games ever?

We have a arcade game in my bar. You know, there's acceptable arcade game. Where's your arcade game? We have Star Wars arcade in my bar. You know, there's acceptable arcade games. Where's your arcade game? We have Star Wars Arcade in my bar. Oh yeah. I love your bar. Thank you. I do, I went there twice.

Thank you. And both times you ignored me. That's not true. It's very close to true. It might not be true, but it's close to true. So the first time you came, you was to do the podcast. Sure. And I've talked to you the whole time because I had to.

There you go. The second time you came, you were nursing Keith. You had your hands full. Oh, is he taxing? I love him to death, but Jesus, I wish I got the comedy Express Keith. I got the comedy Express Keith. I got the comedy not Express. I know, I wish I got the not funny, fully functioning Keith. Instead, I got the funniest version needs help Keith.

Yeah. Good. I mean, but you, we went all the way over to your bar in between spots at the seller and we get all the way over there in the Uber and the Uber was look man. We got the Uber and his leg, you know, we had a kind of jam his leg in and I felt like I was going to break it, you know, and he's laughing the whole time because like he's just laughing at this guy.

He's sick. He thinks it's funny. He thinks it's hilarious that the Uber driver had to push his legs into the Toyota Corolla. And I was like scared that he was going to snap his leg off. And so... Oh my God, he's choked on coffee. But then we went to your bar and we're like, first of all, we were, it's me and Keith.

We were there when you came. We were the ones who called you No Sheldos Joe the first time. So we're, why would you bring that up? I mean, that's not the name of the bar. You make it sound like you're in like, should have been the name of your bar, by the way. Instead of Joey Rose is No Sheldos Joe. Well, I named it, never mind, God.

But anyways, we show up and we're like, we're expecting you as soon as you to see us, to gay, you may a little more fanfare, a little more oomph. You showed up on our first, it was our first anniversary party at 1 a.m. Yeah. Do you know how much I had in vibe at that point? Like the amount of shots I had done at that point

in celebration of we made it to a year. Okay, that's great. But you were talking to some guy like you were going over a fucking script notes, like you had a movie going and started it. And we show you, hey guys, how you doing? That's not that's your full shit. I gave you a big hello. You're a full shit. You show me the hollow you think you gave me. Oh you made it yeah 100% not that's bullshit 100% not that's bullshit 100% also You know what steps on a good hello. What Keith going? Fuck you know that's how he opens the conversation you got a point I forgot about that. Yeah, he really did he really did just go fuck you De Rosa

Yeah, I mean that does put a damper. Everybody around doesn't know. And then just like, who is this old black guy telling the man of the hour go fuck yourself? They thought a hospital patient had escaped and come into the bar. And one of the homeless people came in and they're like, you fucking stank. We should call him. We get him on the phone.

No, we call him last weekend. It's too difficult. I had a call up, set up a nurse thing. We had to make sure he ate before. Plus, all he does is goes, huh? What? Oh, God, man. Yeah.

Yeah, he's an interesting guy. He's an interesting guy. He is, you know, he uh, he's an interesting guy. He's an interesting guy. He is, you know, he's still, go. We have interesting friends, do you know? I mean, think about how long we've been hanging out. I mean, me and you, let's put it, let's just throw, let's just throw it on the table, Joe. Let's throw it on the table.

I mean, we started all this. The pot, yeah. I mean, me and you. Radio, we started? Not radio. He's casting. He's casting. We started after new radio, Joe. Yeah, I mean me radio we started not radio We started after new radio Joe we you and me and Burr what you know not Burr no no Well, I remember doing But actually it's because you showed it to me. Yeah, you you and I I remember doing podcasts with you on that phone service

Mean you used to do we had to call it remember we had to call it But then it mean you started doing, I started with Colin Quinn, but he hated it so much, he just would never do it. And then me and you started doing it, and then me and you upgraded to an actual little mini board into my computer, right? And we would do it at my house.

I remember I bought all my equipment off a Todd Lynn. Todd Lisch, he's the worst, he robbed me so bad. He walked out, hey Bobby, I got all this podcast equipment. You want to buy it? Oh, is he held it a water behind his back with his tiny hand? I forgot. Remember that, Maria Tiny arm and he would like hold it back here to hide it?

Jesus Christ, Joe. What? Like he was a pitcher, setting up a fucking fastball. I forgot about Toddlin's tiny arm. Yeah. Was it a tie, did it not grow? What did it, it was an action? It just was smaller.

I don't remember why. It couldn't, it wasn't that noticeable, but it was like a smaller arm. Yeah, but he had to like hold a pencil in it when it was on stage, right? He could have been the meanest person I ever knew in comedy. And he got nice to me at one point.

There it is, holding the mic. The one, the third one in, it's holding the mic. It is his small little hand. Yeah. Yeah. He got nice to me in the later years. Yeah, just dying. It usually happens with people who die.

His blind. Yeah, blind. He got what I met him. He was nice. Yeah. He, he, he, oh God, I'm such a load. What do you mean? You're a picture of myself and I think you look good, dude. I Started my weight loss journey this week. Oh, that's what I want to talk to you about your weight loss journey. Oh, thank you very much

Hold on a second. What do you mean Todd Lynn gave me the best insult I ever had ever? I told the story of the Patrice benefit. I go this insult is so you mean? Todd Lynn gave me the best insult I ever had. Ever. I told the story of the Patrice benefit. I go, this insult is so good. It trumped even Patrice's best insult. What is it? Todd Lynn was blind in the airport. He came walking up to the gate with two canes

and he heard me and he goes, he goes, ugh, is that deros, awful voice I hear? And I go, Jesus Christ, Todd, was all you're going through. I think you would have become a nicer guy. And he goes, just because I'm blind don't think you can't offend my other senses. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha That's a good way. I could be the greatest slam I've ever heard. And then he died. And then he died. Perfect. Yeah. Good night.

Yeah, they think they. But we started this stuff. I remember me and you did the thing. Yes. And then we brought Danny, Danny down. You brought Danny down. You look, I got this friend of mine. Let's bring him down.

Bugs me still. Why? Because look what he did. Yeah, I and I. I could have shut the door on Dan Soder. Yeah, you could have. And I instead I opened it. You opened it wide and the first time we got him on,

I was so, I was so like this kid is awesome. And you know what Dan did to thank me? What? As soon as he got an opportunity to do a radio show that paid money. Yeah. Hey, Jade, you want to do a show? I can't.

I can't. I mean, I mean, he's fucking cock suckers. They got no gratitude. Get out of him. But we're here now. Yeah, exactly. I mean, you're a seaters, they got no gratitude. But we're here now. Yeah, exactly. I mean, I'm in your seat, Dan, you cock sucker. I'm in a seat.

All right, fine. I'm in Jay's, well, I'm in somebody's seat. I was giving you Jay's seat today. Oh, thanks. I tell you what, we switched seats. Jay switched over to this seat, and I switched over to that seat. Right. I hate that seat.

Christine, I'm telling you right now, that seat has energy. It kills me. You hate it? What do you hate about it? I don't know, there's something. I think it's my back is towards the door. I hate that I can't see J. The person that's there.

Yeah, J. I mean, queues on him, but now even you. I'm like, oh, I wish I'd have better. I hate that. It makes me feel bad. I'll tell you the worst seat. That one. Why, Jacob's seat? It's fine if you're producing.

I've sat in that seat when they've had too many people in the show and they've got to put the third guy, they're fourth guy even there. That seat sucks. It doesn't feel, it feels like when you sit at the head of the dinner table, it doesn't feel right. Because like you're out of the mix. Because I'm a man and I have a family and I'm a dad

and the husband sitting at the head of the table feels good to me. And a show of an ass stoned with her. Do you want one, anybody else? Whatever's that? Oh no. Fuck, quick the dinner you sit on the side to the right of me, right of the father.

That's so funny. Why, where would you sit? If you had a dinner table and a wife and a child, where would you sit? I feel like I'd mix it up every night. Now you wouldn't. I will tell you where I'd sit. Yeah.

I like a three, like when I visit my parents, it's a three top seating. Yeah. It's a three of us. We do two on one side, one on the other. I like facing each other. I don't like the person at the end of the table unless it needs to be there.

I feel like it's your out of the mix. I say, I sit at the head of the table, where you should sit. And when we have company over Thanksgiving we have a bunch of people. I get one head of the table and then the other alpha male gets the other head. And that's it. And everybody else is on the side where you should be. If something goes down the two alpha males are facing each other we know what's going on. Okay. We go let's go. Okay. Yeah. If you were at my house for Thanksgiving dinner,

you would sit to the left of me. What do you anticipate going down? You never know. You never know. Nowadays it's crazy. Yeah. Yeah. If you heard all these podcasts,

this could be spirits. China's coming. The Russians are coming. So is it. I'm with you, Bobby. Yeah, Jim. I'm with you. I'm with you about where you sit.

I couldn't sit there. A big surprise. The guy that went to knife camp also thinks something's gonna go down and thanks. Yeah, you have to know you have to you have to be able to keep your eye on the door. No, when the enemy is entering. Yeah, you got to know you got to know and I know where the knives are by the way because I would love to go to knife camp by the way. I looked into it. I might be going to that this summer, Jacob. So, yeah. I have knives all over the house, in a certain area.

Jacob's Thanksgiving table, they all passed the blood of the turkey around first, so that its soul can be in you. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. They eat the innards first. Was it a clean kill? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. But, uh, wait, so yes, we, Was it a clean kill?

Wait, so yes, we hang on, I'll ask you, Lou, where would you sit if you're at the table with your family? Where would you sit? Whatever's open does not matter to me. Really? I don't think anything's going to happen. I don't need to watch the door. Yeah, but you, you, you, you, you got to check your corners. You got to check, listen, here's the thing. You got to check your corners.

Lou would see whatever the widest chair was. Oh, that's because of his beautiful ass. You're right. All check your colors. Lou would see whatever the widest chair was. That's it. Because of his beautiful ass, you're right. All right, sorry, don't hit me. Don't hit me, I'm just joking. I can't believe he's still remembered that. Don't, don't get mad, I'm just joking around.

He's got a nice bum. Lou, where would you sit? When we have a lot of people over, I don't sit at the head either. When you're home, you don't sit at the head of the table? No, we have a large table. This is what's annoying. This is what's wrong with America.

Evans, where would Jay have you sit? I'm kidding. My friends that she actually like entertains and does dinner parties with her when now X has been, but she said they would actually both sit at the heads of the table. Yes. She's like we entertain in different ways. So when they would have people over, they wouldn't sit next to each other I like I like what you just said I like when the couple whose house it is each of them sits at a head listen

I like that a lot you can't you got kids you can't do that if I got you got listen when when we have a party We have one of those extending tables to right and you'd love it. It's from it's from the fifties So we we extend the table depending on how many people are there, I sit on one side, whoever the other person is, the other guy, we'll sit on the other end. And my wife and the, the girls will sit with the kids on the side to keep them, you know, because they got to cut the stuff up and stuff like that. God. Listen, that's what's wrong with this country, because guys like you sit on the sides, okay? Men need to go back to the top of the table. The fact that you think you, right?

I'm a good example of a sensitive man is your in trouble. Listen, if I'm who you're saying is too sensitive, you're in trouble. You're not sensitive verbally, but if something goes down, you're not the guy I'm going to. If something goes, if, if we're at my house and something goes down, you think I'm gonna hand you a weapon and go, let's go, Joe.

Who are you gonna hand it to, Verzy? I'll hand it to Don. Don will, God, don't. So get her at the other head. All right, well, maybe if you were there, I'd put her at the other end. Let's talk about the quees that you would have at your dinner table

for a holiday from this business. Let's go, Paul Verzy. I've had Paul, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, town guy, Greek Italian, I definitely have him. Let's go Paul Versey. I've had prop Paul. Yeah. Yeah, yeah Yeah, I got you can Italian. I definitely have him cycle. No, you think he could handle a weapon All right, you got a point you got a point. I'll give you that one point. Let me write it down It was my pen. You're using your pens cross enough your little bits. I'm gonna use my bag one point I don't know we're right. Yeah, I'm just yottis poppus. Yottis poppus. Yeah, but okay Maybe not yottis, but if he has the wig, he gets into Mauricia

and that Puerto Rico will fuck somebody up. That's it. So there you go, there you go, that's my point. One to one, what else you got? Who, I'm trying to think who else you've had. I know who else you've had in your house. Rosebud in Andeans. I would not. That's a double void right there.

Rosebud, it's like, I'm not a figure. I gotta tell you, I would give Rosebud a double void right there. Well, Rosebud and psycho. I'm not actually I got to tell you I would give Rose But it like a like an automatic rifle. I would I would not give her any weapon because she'll use it Just if nothing goes down. Yeah, Andy that says the wrong thing. It gets out of line. She'll use it Did you ever see the clips of them when they started fighting on their podcast? No She'll get a look on her face where she is so's like, Oh, where is that? We're looking at that. It's like comfortable a little bit. She is, she'll get a look on her face where she is so disgusted. Yeah, I know.

It's like Jesus. She's got an energy around her though. Like her energy is very alpha. She's great. She bitched me out. Oh yeah? A couple of, like a month ago. About what?

She was on Instagram and she had sweatpants on these weird sweatpants that she was kind of holding out so you can read them on the thing. And I sent her a thing, your sweatpants infuriate me. And she sent me a text, but I'm not in the fucking mood, Bobby. Fuck you. I'm not with this bullshit and I was like, hey, yeah, yeah. I'm so apologize.

Keith calls her bride of Chuckie. Yeah, she's good. I don't, I do not fuck with Rose, but anymore. I apologize. Keith calls her bride of Chuckie. Yeah, she's good. I do not fuck with Rosebud anymore. Last thing I wanna do is get beaten up by a rich white girl that used to date black dudes. Yeah. Oh yeah.

She went out with what's his name forever? Yeah, that sucks that we can't remember his name. He's like an Othee. That's why she dumped them. We can't remember who he is. Yeah. That's what he's good name. He's a blind man. Yeah, that's why she dumped him. We can't remember who he is. That's what he's good through. He's a great guy. He's a great funny guy.

And then Andy also has a, Andy's got a blank stare on his face. Yeah, that's because he hasn't eaten meat in months. Yeah, I know. His blood sugar's low. He had the funniest response when he got sober. I go, I saw him at a party and I go, no, he's talked about it probably. I saw him at a party and I go, no, he's talked about it publicly.

I saw him at a party and I go, what's up dude? Do you want to beer or something? He's like, nah man, I quit drinking, quit smoking weed, I'm sober. And I go, what made you quit? And he goes, because everything was going really well. I'm like, all right, that's whole Jesus Christ. He has really good English and wit. Yeah, that's whole Jesus Christ.

He has really good English wit. Yeah, he really is. I love him. Yeah, he does look like he writes poems. He does. He's very gaunt. Yeah. Yeah, I think Rosebud does let him eat.

I think he's food for him. Yeah, I think Rosebud hits him. Alright, so so far from your guest list. I think I food from them. Yeah, I think I think Ray's, but it hits him. I don't know. All right. So so far from your guest list. Okay, okay. I had a girl that could use a rifle that you're afraid to give it to. Sure.

And a guy that if you put into a wig and address might be a threat. Yep. Okay. Louis CK came last year. How's that? He's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's full. Wow.

Wow. Wow. I mean, wow. I mean, that's, he's. Wow, wow. I mean, wow. He's a friend of mine. He's a friend of mine. I think he would laugh about it if I... Maybe he would hang himself. I mean... I'd hang himself, scarf himself.

Woo! Alright, one for you. I wouldn't make that joke if I think he wouldn't. If he was here, I'd ask you to go on tour. If he was here, I would say, yeah, can I just open for you? Alright, so I got... So wait, Louis, you think Louis is going to handle a fucking weapon? Are you nuts?

I think Louis... Are you nuts? I think 100% Louis, you don I think Louis. Are you nuts? I think 100% Louis. You don't think Louis, he's first of all, he's half Mexican. Oh, come on. So maybe not a gun, but definitely a knife. No, dude, you're nuts.

Louis is, Louis boxes, Louis a fighter, dude. You're nuts, we're nuts. I swear to God. First of all, let me, let's get the record straight about boxing, about these guys that box. Yeah. All right. Paul.

You seem angry about this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Paul, my business, Paul telling me, my partner, Joey Rose, owns a stand. He does this too. He'll be like, I'll call him. I'll be like, well, let's meet today at one. He's like, I can't, I'm training. You're not getting ready for a fight, Paul.

You're a fat guy that a guy teaches how to hit a bag. Everybody is doing this thing where they're like, they're like, yeah, I train, I box. No, you don't. You put on boxing gloves. I'm gonna hit a thing that doesn't hit you back. I'm gonna tell you right now. That is not boxing. I'm gonna tell you right now.

Good. I will beat the shit out of you in boxing if Maroon five phone call, phone pay phone is playing, you're dead. You're dead. Maroon phone pay phone's playing in the red. And I will beat the shit out. Now, let me tell you who's at my Thanksgiving.

Wait a minute, I'm not done. Oh, all right. I have more. Louis, I love him, but no, he's not fired. I had my calta, was at my home. Calta? Calta at the head of the table, me one one side, he's not fired. I had Mike Calta, was that my home? Calta? Calta, at the head of the table, me and one side him on the other.

Let me tell you what happened if a home invasion happened with Calta. First of all, you, good, good. You would be screaming, barricade the door, everybody would be going to be barricade the door. You would turn around and you would see Mike picking food off a people's plate. That is a really mean, I mean that is just mean.

That's fat-chaming and I'm not, I won't stand for it. But is it also accurate? Tell me if it's accurate. Well it depends. If the stuffing was on his end, maybe yes. Like something ran out. Yeah, something ran out. If the dark meat was going on.

No. Dude, my caltah has 95 guns. Alright, caltah I'll give you, I'll give you caltah. No. Dude, my Calta has 95 guns. All right, Calta, I'll give you, I'll give you Calta. Okay. Calta. Okay, ready? You ready for this?

Yes. I had Mike Suarez. Wait, why am I blanking on who Mike Suarez is? Wait, who's Mike Suarez again? What's so funny? You laughing at him. You know, mush, he might. Oh, mush.

Mush. Yeah, mush. Oh yeah, yeah. Don't fight. First of all, Schwarves, I'm telling you right now, he is inches away from slicing necks, okay? I'm telling you right now, you look at him. Take a look at him, next time he opens for you.

Watch, he's staring at you, waiting for you to, he's gonna snap some day. and he's gonna fill out a key. I think he is a quiet storm inside of him, but I'm not. This is why I know, this is why I know he's a crazy person. At the end of the turkey dinner, we had the turkey carcass, right? Just a little meat on it here and there. I said, hey, jokingly, do you want that?

He said, y'all take it. He took the carcass, and literally, I just heard bones breaking. He snapped it and cracked it and pushed it into a tub work container that the carcass shouldn't have bitten, but then it did fit in it. Yeah. So that says to me, he's murdered hookers. It's either that or he knows how to make a turkey soup.

It's both. It's both. It can't be both. But, okay, fine. I swear I'm gonna give it to you just because you're rosters me right now. I mean, I got three. You go.

You have Calta and Swarage. Louis does not count. Dude, I got Mauricia. I got, if he changes into the soupie here of Puerto Rican, I got three. I mean, you know. No, because, this is what happens. Here's what happens. Here's what happens.

Here's why Yannis isn't gonna work. It's more easier. You're gonna say, Yannis, dress up as Mauricia, we need you and he's gonna go, you know dude, I don't know if you saw my clips, I do more than just Mauricia and he's not gonna wanna do it cause he wants you to respect him, just as him.

What? What, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, Well, we need you to just please be more easy right now. It's like the Hulk wouldn't get turned into the Hulk and games I do it. I can't yeah, I want you to let just listen to my thoughts as a scientist Why don't you just turn into the fucking yeah do the green things stupid? I'm dying turn into the green thing so we can move some tickets Please I wonder why I don't have any friends All right, go ahead. So all right. I got that. I got that all right and who else? I wonder why I don't have any friends. All right, go ahead.

So I got that, I got that, all right, and who else? I think that's it, I think that's it. I had no, I had Norton. Oh my God. I had a kid of you. But I had Norton and his girlfriend. I would rather, dude, I had Norton and his girlfriend. Okay, let me tell you something. Okay. I would rather have

I was trying to think of a funny Norton like another Norton. I can't think of another funny Norton Like Ed Norton's actually a tough kind of guy. I was gonna say I'd rather have something Norton. Yeah Ralph nor Ed Norton from the honey That's not funny. Yeah, you want to work this out on air? I mean we can take it we're taking a break around a half Yeah Ralph nor Ed Norton from the hunting. That's not funny. Yep. You want to work this out on air? I mean, we can take it. We're taking a break around a half. We got to kill another 90 minutes. No, what good.

We don't have to if we keep doing this. I can kill the show. Jay's going to come back and beg Dan. Please. I don't know. Nothing would be. And I asked the criteria. You're inviting which comics you want

to want over for Thanksgiving, if, like, say, the apocalypse have to. the criteria. So you're inviting which comics you would want to want over for Thanksgiving, if like, say the apocalypse have to and you needed. Well, no, what we're saying, Jacob, what we're saying is if something went down to Thanksgiving, who would you already have at your table? These are the people that Bobby has to his house yeah, often, right? Yeah Thanksgiving dinner. Those are the people I've had at my house. If I assemble the Thanksgiving of my

I close his comedy friends. I would destroy your things. You would not who you When it comes to war maybe maybe if we were writing papers and you were correcting their English right off the bat Dante Dante Nero right off the bat Listen, he would he would take any of these guys apart at the seams Listen first of all I could have Dante. You would never invite Dante. Dante's one of my closest friends. I'd have him at my Thanksgiving.

Oh, what the fuck? I would have him at my Thanksgiving. I've never seen you with Dante. Ever. Bring up your Instagram. Dante and I. Show me a one photo of you and Dante on Instagram. Dante and I hang out all the time.

Number two, I'm a fear. I want to call, I, that's, Arish, you're fear. You give a spike back to that lunatic. He's going to get something done. He's going to throw pee or blood at you. That's not bad. Number number number three and four. Yeah. Brian Quinn and Salvo Kano of the impractical jokers. What are they going to get a big Frank's? Yeah, I was going to say, they'll

send up some sort of home alone marble trick. They'll do something I'll give you those two but I'm not giving Dante is you're just throwing that in there. No, I am telling you Good me Jimmy Martinez. Okay. No, Dante's one of my best friends. I've never seen you with him You've never brought up his name. This is bullshit. It's not you can you can call him right now and ask him There's no way that your friends I promised you if you called Dante right now and ask him. There's no way that you're friends. I promised you if you called Dante right now and said, how close are you with the Rosa?

He'd go, the Rosa's one of my best friends. I promise you he would say that. What if he didn't? I'm gonna find out where I am. I promise you he won't. That's how confident I am that I'll say this. Don't say. Dante.

Now. I don't claim. Now you threw Louis CK into the mix. That's your A-lister. Hang on. I'm calling him right now. I'm gonna-lister. Hang on, I'm calling him right now. I'm gonna throw an a-lister. I'm calling him right now. There's no way.

Make sure you let him know about it. Right back. No, wait, don't take, we're on the air. We're on the air right now, bonfire right now. You have a... Okay. One second, it's gonna take a second. Yeah.

Okay. Is that... Beautiful. Listen, are you best friends with Joe DeRosa? Yeah, wait a minute. I'm gonna ask you again. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Listen to me and know that Patrice may be dead, but he can hear He's still listening. You understand that know that now. He's still he's still around are you and don't Joe DeRosa best friends? Okay, okay, if If there was a Thanksgiving dinner and I invited you or Joe invited you,

who's house would you go to? Joe's. Who's house would you want to go to? Yeah. Doesn't matter. I win. I win. I win.

Dante, we're talking about, Dante, we're talking about if, if either of our Thanksgiving dinners got attacked, who would get through by handing out weapons to their friends? This is all Bobby's roster so far. It's the worst roster I've ever heard. I didn't know you're going to have Dante. I didn't know you made a connection with Dante because you thought about this years ago.

If something bad happened, I need a big friend. He was my first guy out of the gate. He's my first, he's my first guy out of the gate. And he's not. He's been to my. Okay, listen, you're not best friends. What's Joe's what's Joe's middle name? You don't know my middle name We're kind of gay guys know their friends best middle name Thank you, you get a valid point there, and I can't say anything back because he'll rip my head off and shit down it You get a valid point there and I can't say anything back cuz he'll rip my head off and shit down it Dante, Dante though, so with me and you are best friends

No, let him in first of a hang on shut up Joe. Stop directing my friend. Let him answer on his own. What did you say? No, enough is friends. Where are we at one point? Uh, I thought so yeah, but you don't call me motherfucker. Yeah. I mean, I don't know, hang on, I'm gonna say, why do you call me motherfucker? I mean, we, we are friends. You're asking me a question like, you've made an effort to sustain this relationship, and you haven't. You sound hurt. I'm so sorry. No, I'm going. I have a new friend, and you're jealous.

I mean, I mean, your friend is like,, I mean, he has I mean, he's single He's got no family. He's got nothing. Oh my god. What if Dante beat me up because I was talking shit about I would love it I got it. I got it. I got my agent all the life. All right. Thank you. Thank you. I hope you get it, buddy I'll talk to you. I'll call you tomorrow. Bye. All right. So now I'm taking him away from you. So my roster is so far.

Watch what I do. Watch what I do. I'm taking next Thanksgiving. Guess what, Nante is going to be my house. I'm going to make such an effort to be friends with Nante. It's fine. I'm supposed to Thanksgiving. I don't give a shit.

I don't mind him over everything. He's going to be my best friend next year. Yeah. Watch. Let's keep going. I'm getting a bone air in. Let's keep going here. I have Nante. Yeah, watch. I'm gonna get a bone. I'm getting a bone Aaron

Let's keep going here. I have Dante. I have Ari one. I'm not giving you Ari fuck off I'm not giving you Ari. Ari. What is Ari gonna do? Dev you been any look it? I've been places with Ari and he gets scared he just He's not Ari Shaffir get punched repeatedly in the face. So you're gonna use him as a not flinch. Yes. Yes.

Okay, I'm gonna say he got punched in the face and didn't flinch because he can't do anything back. He has to take it. So unless you use an Ari as a barrier or to put in front of the door when they come through, then I don't give you Ari. I'm talking about people that actually do something. You wanna, you wanna, you wanna say Rosebud?

I got Marina. Marina will do something. Oh, this is nuts. All right, wow, all right, I'm getting nuts. This is nuts, all right. Marina, you got to, I'm not giving you, I'll give you half of Ari as a barrier only. Then Ari and Marisi are the same. Okay, that's fine got to, I'm not giving you our, I'll give you half our as a barrier only. Are you, then are you and Mauricio are the same?

Okay, that's fine. Barrier. He's a barrier. He's not a physical threat to anybody. You're not giving him anything. You throw in an a-lister with Louis. Yeah. Oh, whoa. Whoa. Okay. Yeah. I threw an a-lister. Yeah. What? What? I don't know. I don't, because you, you know more a-listers than me. Well, you've got me beat on a-listers. Okay. Go ahead. Who do you got? The most recent a-lister that I received a text from.

I don't like your smirk. I don't like it. Look it. You'll know. I'm about to give you a major point here. Okay, go ahead. The most recent a-lister to text me. Sure. And invite me to something

was Pat Nons' walk. He's not going to do anything in a fight. No. Oh my God. I think he actually turns into something when threats are, he just curls up in a ball. I gotta be honest, I really love Pat. I would, before I turned him for help, I would throw stuffing at the intruder.

Oh. I guess as soon as the threat knocked on the door, he literally would turn into like a gnome and be on your front lawn. Like, what's happening? Yeah, he's, that's terrible. Pat and the Huzzle is terrible. But, yes.

I got a dinner invitation tomorrow night. Oh God. From TJ Miller. Now I think TJ could do a little damage in his gymnasium. Yeah. Yeah. You know, no, but he would actually kill everybody in the house too. TJ, TJ's the guy that actually kill everybody in the house, too.

TJ, TJ's the guy that would turn and kill the kids so they couldn't kill them. Yeah, he'd be like, you wanna kill you, let it do something? No, the intruders would come into the house. Where are they? They're all dead. You'll do nothing to anybody. Slice his own throat. I'm gonna count that as one. I'm gonna put TJ out. Marina and TJ, okay. So you got four.

I got three. I got Dante Marina TJ, that's two. I give you three. Dante Marina TJ, wouldn't you have another one? Didn't you have another one? You said a half Ari. Half Ari. But if you get rid of Maurice, I'll give you Mauricia.

We've got three on three. Wait, you had Q and Sal as well. Q and Sal, let's say Q and that would be five. Four. That would be five, but if... But Q and Sal was a funny one. They're not gonna fight. Yeah, Q.

Yes. That's like my mush. But mush is a psycho. Mush would kill people. So let's just say we have three. Mush will kill people. I'm gonna give you full Maurizia. Full.

Hey puppy. Weapon. Weapon. Yeah. And here's where I'm gonna give it to you. Hey puppy, weapon, weapon. Yeah. And here's where I'm going to give it to you. She would just dance for them and then suck them off. Here's where I'm going to give it to you.

If it's not more easy as stabbing the intruder, Yannis as himself will talk the intruder to sleep about the banks. Either way, you've got a good defense with your eyes. That's just, you know what? I don't like that. I don't like that. I think you win.

No, no, no, we got three. We got three. You have three and I have three? Yeah, I'm saying we need, now it's into... Wait, wait, wait, stuff stuff something you don't have Something you don't have and probably won't have what a loving wife Does that have to do it Something to live something to fight for yes, I have motivation and a beautiful young boy

Let me tell you something I got 42 video game systems that don't nag me. Oh, fucking god. I got something to defend. Don't worry about it. Yeah, they don't wake up with an attitude. Are you coming out and saying goodbye to your son? No. Max wants to say goodbye.

Do you want coffee? No, I don't want it if that's the fucking tone you're giving it to me. Are you taking your car or mine? I don't know which one do you want me to because apparently you have an attitude about one of them. Oh, God. Alright, we gotta do, we gotta do tie-breakers now. Well, I have, I have my wife.

No, no, no, no, let's keep it in showbiz. This is fun. Showbiz fighters. But you got it, here's the rules of the game. You got it, who conceivably? I'm still hurt by Dante. Would you, it. Here's the rules of the game. You got it. Who conceivably? I'm still hurt by Dante. Would you? That fucking bothers me. That bothers me. You made a secret friend. It's not a secret friend. You haven't. You've been friends with them for six months. This is a new thing. This is not. No, it's not. We became super. We were already friends and we became really, really tight during the lockdown. Why? I don't know, we just did. What do you have nothing in common?

Honestly, you know what, really cemented our, we would call each other and talk about race stuff. We would have like these discussions about race. And he was a great guy to talk to him. I did that about him, I don't know, fight. Well, that'll do it. Cause I'm from Boston. And then you went in.

Okay. That's easy. Easy. Just radio. Well, because I'll do it because I'm from Boston and then you went easy easy This radio We have sponsors. This isn't this isn't why I can WD I'll tell you what I was gonna say it wasn't anything like that I but I did fight my time. It wasn't about you went down day or or race Oh, so let me ask you question Joe. Yeah since we're on this topic of friends Yes, are we are we're on this topic of friends. Yes. Are we friends like still?

Of course. Are you better friends with Dante than me? Depends. Wow, this is nuts. Louis, this is nuts. You're one of, listen. I mean, God. Dante and I are friends in the sense of,

we started together and we came up together. You and I are friends in the sense of we started together and we came up together. You and I are friends in the sense of, you were a guy that took me under your wing and then eventually I became a pro and now we're friends. You know what I mean? So it's a little bit of a different dynamic. I still have a little bit of an older brother thing with you that I see you as.

Yeah, but we've been through the Ranger dude. Of course, you wanna make those friends in the fucking world. So we are more close than you and Dante. I can't, if Dante was built differently, I would maybe answer that question. What? He's a big guy. Okay.

What am I? I'm not scared of you. So, I mean, I'm like, I'm like, you could beat me up and I'm still not scared of you. I could beat the shit out of you. Of course you could. You really do talk to me like I can't beat you up. I know you could beat the shit out of me. He's yelled at me like really do talk to me like I can't beat you up. I know you could beat the shit out of me.

He's yelled at me like he's beat me up before. Like in a cab. Remember the time you were yelling at me and it was Morgan Murphy? And you were screaming at me. You were yelling at me. You yelled at me so bad Morgan called me and she goes, are you okay?

Yeah, but I can beat you up. I know you can. I'm not, listen, that's not saying much that you could beat anyone I can beat. By the way, you're right about Ari. Here's why. What is Calf-Gay? I mean, here's why.

Yeah. He came down after the, what's it called? After the show on Friday. Sure. We all went down to my bar and legit. You know what? I can't even say it was a crazy guy. He might have just been shit faced and like a horrible drunk because he was he was clean and very clean new like he was well put together. But he was just out of his fucking mind. The guy came into the bar. Did he have shoelaces? Yeah, yeah. No, he was not a homeless person.

No, he had like, he had like the vest on. What's wrong? He had, he was put together. But he came in holding a beer from the outside. And like as soon as he walked in, you just felt like, uh oh, like somebody's here now, like something just happened. And he was lit the fuck up.

And you know, we were kind of like okay like let's just keep an eye make sure that guy doesn't do anything crazy bartender went over she's like sir can I get you anything he's like no no and he was a little standoffish and I'm like just just be careful you know and then he started getting belligerent with some customers. So, I told the bartender, said, step back, I'll go handle him. The manager and how? Like, what's hand-watt? Being like, fuck you, man! That's aggressive. So, I walked over to him.

The bartender goes over and she goes, you gotta get something or leave. He goes, fuck you, fuck you, bitch! So, I'm like, all right, now we got a problem, right? So, I tell the bartender, go, just step back, I'll handle this. I went over to him. I got- You started laughing? No, I got, him the bartender go just step back. I'll handle this. I went over to him. I Go started laughing. No, I go buddy. You got to go you got to go right now really he goes Screaming suck my dick at me

What the fuck are you gonna do try to do some shit watch what happens that kind of shit, right? Yeah So I go okay, so I walk out the front door. I call the cops Sorry, he thought he's like handing me to laugh. Yeah, he's like in walk out the front door, I call the cops. Sorry. He's like, he's like, I can't imagine it. Yeah, he's like in my face in the bar. Right. I walk outside, he follows me outside while I call the cops.

He's screaming at me outside, call me a bitch pussy. He's so drunk though that I'm able to just slip past him and I just shut the door and lock it. So now he's locked out and he's like, trying to get in. He's like a Tom and Jerry move, literally. And everybody's like, oh my God, thank God. Like the entire bar was watching. It was crazy.

And everybody's like, thank God, thank God, you're all right. Thank God, you're all right. You know where Ari was? He couldn't have been farther back. Yes. And to the bar. And then all my friends that we were with with him, they go, you know if he did anything,

we all would have jumped in. I'm like, yeah, I'm fucking sure you would have. Yeah. I'm not a person. Yeah. Walk, so you're right about our, if I was there, what have I, what would I have done? I don't know.

I'll tell you. It was crazy. I'll tell you what I would have done. I know what I hope you would have done. And when he said suck my dick, I would have blown him right there. And right when he came, I'd walk him outside, and be like, come on buddy, you gotta go. Well, I bet he had a big one on him.

You digs me? Yeah, he had big dick energy. But I mean, this guy was like, it was wild, dude. Yeah. It was wild. And you can't... That neighborhood is, I'm sorry to say, Joe, that neighborhood's creepy. No, it's not it's the lower east side

Oh, that's the I mean yesterday. I mean in my crazy. It's creepy the creepiest neighborhood in Manhattan Now is this neighborhood because all the you've ever been in this neighborhood at nine o'clock when the fucking sun goes down Dude it's fucking creepy dude the East Village is creepy He's out at lower east side are two different neighborhoods. Are you, you're in alphabet city? No, I'm Lower East Side. Which is a sketchy part of town? It's a sketchy part of town. I remember one of them.

Do we, that's great. It's crazy. It's a crazy part of town. It's not though. Dude, I remember being there at that night, the people won't go around. I, my, my, my, my Spidey senses are off. It's no more, it's no more it's no

more sketchy it's no more sketchy than the West Village is it night I mean I guess but it's it's sketchy I don't I don't think it is either I think the West Village East Village alphabet city Lower East Side so how are all I have seen there's a lot of people and a lot of weirdos around I'm not just saying this I'm not just saying this because my bar is in one place and I'm talking about some, I am not just saying this. I have seen way, way, way more crazy shit happen at that McDonald's that's now closed near the Comedy Cell. That's actually the Comedy Cell now.

Yeah, I heard. Oh, what's that? But no, I heard. I'll get you in, you want me to get you in? I heard. I'll get you a spot. Yeah, but I didn't mean it like I heard. I just meant like I you in? I heard. I'll get you a spot. Yeah. But I didn't mean it like I heard. I just meant like I, yeah, I heard.

But it's that area. You will find more, you will find more, there is a Michelin star restaurant, a block from my bar. You will not find that in the West Village in that area. You won't, you won't even find craft cocktail bars in that, in that you've got to walk away. I don't know, I don't know. This is the gayest conversation I've ever had. I don't know what craft cocktail bars in that, in that you've got to walk away. I don't know. Look, I don't know.

This is the gayest conversation I've ever had. I don't know what craft cocktail bar is. I just go, I'm saying I don't think you know what you're saying. I just know from being in your neighborhood and being in the West Village, yes, there's more crazy people now than there was in the West Village because of that no bit, but do it back then.

Since I've been in New York, the West, the East Village has been crazier. Thompson Square Park is not- It's not the East Village. But that's the East Village. I'm on the lower East Side. What the fuck is the difference? You cross-Helston.

There's two, there are two different neighborhoods. Yeah. It's like saying the Upper East Side is Chelsea, or you know what I mean, or is Grammar C, it's not. It's two different neighborhoods. But even that part is not, isn't that where the Comedy Club used to be, the other comedy club?

Which one? Remember the East Phil, was it East, what was the comedy club over there? No, he's filled in the East Village. What was the comedy club? He's found New York comedy club, where it's street. Laugh lounge, I think.

Laugh lounge, wasn't that where he is? That was the low-rate side, yeah. I, from what I hear. Sort of. But that's where all the rock clubs were, right? Yeah, but dude, you're judging the lower east side by a decade ago, and I I'm saying maybe I am. It's not. I live in Westchester, which is a very nice neighborhood.

I will tell you this. I will tell you this. Lower east side, you'll find more as you put it, foofy stuff, than you will in my point is this. People talk about certain neighborhoods in New York. They'll say this stuff about neighborhoods in Brooklyn. They'll say it about the lower east side. They'll say it about parts of when you get up north toward Harlem and stuff. They'll go, oh, that neighborhood's roads and rough neighborhood. It's like, no, it's actually not a rough neighborhood. It's got a little more grime to it,

meaning there's more graffiti and stuff like that. But these neighborhoods that are supposedly the good neighborhoods that are pricey, they have way more crazy shit happening in them. I can't fight you on this because I haven't lived in the city in 10 years. Right. Yeah. So I can't, I'm fighting you on something that I used to know because I lived in, you know,

Hell's Kitchen for. Right. We're not fighting. 50, we're not fighting, but you know, debating. I know that. Actually, where you used to live in this. I mean, we're going to fight if you keep pointing that thing at me. Where you used to live, where you used to live in Manhattan is a fight if you keep pointing that thing at me where you used to live

Where you used to live in Manhattan is a is a perfect example what we're talking. We used to yes, yes Yes, how's the example? I'm real people used to talk about house kitchen when we live there. They be like, oh, that's a fucking rough name It's like what are you talking about? No, it's not it was it was was they all were at one point right and then the gaze moved in It made it awesome. What do you think's happened on the lower east side? All right, all the gays down the lower east side. It's all fucking mustache barber shops I'm gonna come out of your sandwich shop more. Yeah, I'll give you a fucking But no craft cocktail bar means bars where they make,

you know, like those like speakeasy style cocktail bars where they put bottles fruit into a drink. I know nothing about that, nothing about that. I don't know, I don't know, that sounds foofy, that's foofy. It is foofy. You like foofy. I don't, I don't like craft cocktail bars,

but I'm telling you there's a lot of those on the lower east side. All right, well listen, we have to take a break. All right, that's fair. We're gonna take a nice break, but I got something. We're not gonna fight, but I have something else that we're gonna talk about. We never finished our game. We'll finish our game when we come back, but also.

And this? Yes. Please. Yes. I'm not gonna tell you, but yes, because me and you have had this debate for a long time. Yes. And now it's come into the light again, and maybe we'll solve it on air with the fans and everybody in the room Christine's here Lou is here black loose here. Jacob's is in Florida, but he's here and big J is here in our hearts and and Dan

Sotas in the sky with us and We got Joe de Rosa my my I thought a closer friend there. We are but we got Joe Deroza. My, I thought a closer friend there we are, but we got Joe Deroza. Joe Deroza, he's got shows this Thursday, March 30th, and Hamtrak, Michigan, then Grand Rapids, Chicago, Bativa, Illinois, through April 2nd. You can go to jodaroza.com. No, no, Joe Deroza info.

Joe Deroza info.com. And I actually did that run really fun run. you can go to joderosadj comedy dot com no no joderosad info joderosadj joderosadj info dot com and i actually did that run really fun run fun rooms you can have a blast on that thing so make sure you check him out and of course big jayokasin has his brand new special dog belly april fifth it's on youtube dot com slash at big jayokasin so make sure you check that out we'll be right back with the bonfire It's on youtube.com slash at Big J.O.K.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S our actual serious XM radio show. If you want the whole thing, the whole damn thing, go to seriousxm.com slashbombfire for a special offer. That's right, and go to bigjcommy.com

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