The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Heaven Help Us

Episode Date: April 14, 2023

A semi-famous 80's actor turns gay porn star!

James Franco accused a sexual harassment. If James Franco asked a sexually harassed to get busied, then I better learn how to fucking a ski mask. You know what I mean? This is Big J. O'Coursen, and my new special dog, Belly, live from Skankfest, out now on YouTube.

Scott Fulton, Big J. O'Coursen! And now, the Bonfire, with Big J. O'Coursen and Robert Kelly. We're back with the bonfire everybody. Jacob and Tom, what's going on over there? What's going on over there on Jacket Central? Jay, I can't wait to see this jacket. We've been waiting a long time and here it is. 15th caller gets to pick Jacob's jacket color, 15th caller. Drumroll, please!

That's right, all your favorite hits Let's we check the little Jacob it's house go over Jacob in the wardrobe Jacob what's going on with this jacket? Is it swayed is it leather? Let's see it Jacob show us the what kind of jackets of these I think it's gonna have cuffs It's cuffs. It's gonna have faunsy cuffs. I tell you what it's gonna have. It's gonna be a very Non-aggressive collar. Swade Jacob is just like your ass. It just looks You don't know what I'm old like I was like putting on brute. Is it tant like a tan swayed a brown swayed? Yeah, yeah, dude You got it bright dark brown dark chocolate chocolate. All right. Well chocolate. I love it a chocolate brown is a good brown I'm a fan of chocolate brown. He need this needs to be a more of an everyday.

Everyday. It's an everyday jacket. Well, are we talking spring or winter also? We're spring now, right? I'm gonna send you her tips for spring jackets to Christine. Okay. Nice for Ashley Weston, right? How does she feel about armpit ventilation in T-shirts?

I mean, I don't. For those summer. For the summer. She's definitely shit on that look. Really? Well, let me tell you who's going to be laughing in the summertime. Lou Witsky all the way home. What is this cool, cool armpit?

Right, it's cool. It does a sweat. He's got those beautiful Dutch doll eyes, which I love. You know what? Is that from doing this? I love you, Eddie Vedder. This is how are you Is that from doing this? I love you, Eddie Vedder. This is how are you doing double, double horns? I love you, Eddie Vedder.

From raising my hands and victory. What's the victory? Where did you win? Good time, man. Jacob, how's your, let me ask you this because we're getting this off Etsy, right? Let me ask you this, Jacob, and I mean this. What is your skin deal with with garbage? Jury.

What does that mean? I've never worn anything. If you wear garbage jewelry, sometimes I can't do it. I can't do it. I get like a rash right away. It's bad for my skin. I don't know. I don't know. You got it. You got it. Because if you wear certain metals, certain people break out. Because this set is 40 bucks and that's not going to be high quality. Are you sure? To who? To who? That's what he crazed.

What is it, Murkery? 40 bucks? That's a lot of little deneros, dude. 18 karat silver. Silver. And you know what else? When the dollar crashes in a couple weeks, you're gonna have currency around your neck.

You'll be able to buy bread with this. What do you think about that? It's a little cut your fucking head off just to get that silver. You think that's what happens? Yeah. And also, Jacob, if you find, if we find, yeah, you can see, you can see, a bullet, a silver bullet. Well, I say you just put it between your fingers and punch it right into his fucking liking heart. That does work. As long as a silver gets in there, dude, dude, it does work. How come they never did that? I don't think they'd

never made like brass knuckles with knives with silver. How come I always had to be a bullet? Um, no, I think they've, the bolts the easiest you can do from a distance. Yeah, but they move fast, dude. I just have something to do. You want to get you want to get in close with a werewolf. 35 years, other questions probably been in my mind. It turns out, and I've never thought before why in the movie Fright Knight, when Evil Ed, his friend, turned to a vampire, his last act before he died was a turn to a werewolf. He was a werewolf and the last act before he died was he turned into a gay porn star. And then he did become a gay porn star. I mean, a really gay porn star. I know. you know what's funny? For some reason when they say, hey, you know, this guy did gay porn. He was a mainstream actor and then he also did gay porn.

You always picture them being on top. And that's not what that video is. That video with Rolls-Gates? He is getting but fucked hard. On Rolls-Gates, which is, I mean, you're moving. There's no stability. Yeah. I mean, you're going back and forth. It's a tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough right now. Right now. Yeah. One of my favorite movies. What? Right now it's one of my all time favorite. The original.

The one that I haven't tightnights. The parody he did where he gets his asshole fucked and roller skates. There he is right there. Oh wait, they've got one. Where is it? Jesus. No, that's not it. Oh my god.

Oh my god. You got to find his actual name, Jacob. I forgot. Let me look it up. I haven't seen it in Jeffreys. That's it. That's it. I remember I saw that member. New York had nine. It was a cable. Channel nine. And then guy had a show where he would go back and find out where what act. That's just an ad. I know what actors did. And they he's he's the

other is there he is Look at him. He's the first one on his knees, but it's not even here's the thing. It's not even that far away from Oh God, there's an asshole. Oh God. Yeah, he's on He's what though and I if I just got to be completely honest here. Mm-hmm looks like he throws a pretty good beach I mean dude. I don't think that's a beach. I think that's called a... No, this is ass hole-looking. Yeah, that's called the salad toss.

No, but when he was getting face fucked the other way, he was really doing a good job. This is different, this is a different thing. Jacob, do me a fair key, please, I'll come up, you're producing the show. I don't, I... Jacob, you're producing the show, please, you do more. I don't wanna see Evilette doing this.

Yeah, I'm thinking we're gonna get a mysterious Columnor that says Jim says we can't watch Evil Ed do gay porn I mean this is terrible. He does have a tan line which I do like I didn't write this is a great body Evil Ed He did of course he did William Ragsdale is built like D'Arosa. Wait did he do this before Evil Ed and it was found out or was this what he? No only thing I'm sure it was it wasn't D' wasn't during. This is right after he had a good run and then acting dried up. Is that true? One of the best comedies he did simultaneously is heaven help us. He went to gay porn after. Yeah. Oh, I thought he was a gay porn dude and I'm not far from it. I don't

think you can go that way. I think that's against the rules. You can't go gay porn dude and I know I know you can go that way I think that's against the rules you can't go gay porn two movies you have to go movies to gay porn It's got a pretty average pecker evil ed. I think around 90 oh my god. That's the kid from heaven help us yeah, get his cock sucked. No, it was I Just said heaven help us. I couldn't see his face. It was all dick-and-ass Williams Hey, I mean I got a back lieu up not it He was buried in some guy's butthole. It's very hard to recognize even the FBI would be like I don't know We can't figure out who it is boy. I sure hope you could pull me out of a line if I'm sucking some guys ass Lou I mean God forbid I hope I'm glad you're not my emergency contact

Is this your friend Jay? I can't tell this face buried that guy's bungalow Christine cute gets it the bud fucking please a little taste of everything This is terrible dude All right, he's got the fingers up there now. He's gonna wear ah come on Jay He's got two finger with Jacob said I have to be descriptive now. He's if we're watching videos So now he's just getting in it looks like and he's in. He's in and that guy knows it. Oh, he's making a face.

It's like a good bad face. That's the kid. That's an actor. No, no, no. That's the actor kid. The balls on top is the actor kid. I'm going in. Right now what we're seeing is a tiny, tiny ball bag.

I think the guy using steroids small ball bag But he's wearing a condom which I do appreciate because this is during the 80s early 90s. Yeah pandemic It is good radio technique and also the guy getting butt fucked has bigger balls Figuratively and literally and he's wearing a hat which he wears a lot in a lot of his forms I think but I think he's branding too. I which he wears a lot in a lot of his forms. I think, but I think he's branding too. I think he was ahead of the curve. He's a hat guy.

He was branding. I think you could buy that off his website, those hats. Oh my God. Let's go to get everything. Kristen, you find another video where he gets buttfucks, please. Can you find one where he roller skates in the roller skates? His name, gay porn, and then roller skating. I think is what we want.

Steven Jeffries, roller skates but fuck porn yeah oh boy potato patata this is terrible Jacob I'm looking up the porn that he's I was IMDB. Jacob look up at the point right here I gotta tell you this guy doesn't seem to be loving it do you know what I mean I thought sex is looks more fun than this not when the the... He could have gone... Yes? I'm not sure if he went by... Oh wait, for the listeners at home, it's still him butt-fucking-the-guy.

And the guy's not- does not have a good face on him. The guy is- I wouldn't say he's not a generous lover, because he's letting him work his ass all over, but he's not giving good like feedback. Yeah, he has the same face an older crowd would have watching Geno Bisconte perform comedy. There we go That is a great analogy and I'll tell you what I don't think I've ever watched gay missionary sex before I don't want now a lot of people probably how is that even possible well. I'll tell you listeners at home The guy is now laying on his back He's spreading gently spreading open the top of his ass crack

Which doesn't he be doing anything other than giving a little better view of Evil Ed from frite night and of course heaven help us Is but fucking him Completely now I'll take this with you Bobby. Yeah Where does he blow the load Chester face? He's gonna blow it right on the face if he's a professional which I think he is I think he's gonna blow it right on his face. If he's a professional, which I think he is, I think he's gonna blow it right on his face.

He's gonna fake the chest and then right on the face. But the guy- He's gonna shoot over the chest. He's never come from between the legs. I think he's gonna go right out, over to the chest and then at the last minute go right on the face and the guy is gonna receive it, but not well.

That's so specific that if you are right at this point, Bobby, I already know you jerked off to this video. Twice. He goes a little on the chest by accident, some gets on the face. I think you please get to the cum shot. Stop making a meal out of it. I'm gonna throw up. I feel like it's coming. It's happening.

It's coming. What can you tell, little walkie-tale? Because it's only seconds left. It's like feeling train tracks, you know, it's coming. Oh what can you tell? What can you tell? Because it's only seconds left. I feel your train tracks. You know it's coming Oh, you can put your head down to the guy's asshole and hear the train to come in and And right now he's holding up. He's right. He's stealing up at Days between the legs. No, no

At the Phase between the legs no no Hang on it's a lot of facial work right here, okay hang on And that's why you need Right directly on the abs like you said and they could have used the Jacob jisgrove available Coming soon to the bonfire the Jacob leather jisgrove is being made right now by the way Yes, it's being made where he could have he had one first. Why wouldn't have to clean up cleanup would be easy And he'd also know his arc wait the guy who just got but fuck has to jerk himself off of the and by the way It's not the same guy. That's a black penis.

That's insane. Why is that insane? Because they're... The guy is supposed to be... He's a white gentleman and his dick and hand are black. Yeah, well they had a... They did a close-up. They didn't get that day, so they had to cut it in as a joke.

Christine, did you get the rollerer Skates guy getting butt fucked? Do I have to walk you through everything in your job? No, but I found out that he goes by Sam. Oh, I didn't even have a cuddle afterwards. Aw, a cuddle, but they're cuddling like two uncles. I know, and then when they get off each other's bellies, it's going to look like a grilled cheese sandwich getting opened. No, throw up.

I'm just going to pee. Yeah. No, throw up. No, just throw up. There's this guy. You're feeling open to grilled cheese. Yeah, but American white cheese. Yeah.

Yeah. It's like a white goota. Yeah. But, dog belly is at a million something. Hey, Christine, I'm sorry I sent you down this path. I apologize. We can't find the role skating dude's name gay porn. Just right, Stephen Jeffrey's porn.

We'll be able to tell by the picture which one. He has a headband tight shorts. How do I know this? I can read you some of the names, but none of them specifically, I don't know, maybe I'm right. Hold on. So I'm going to start at the beginning of the porn career. OK.

If one's called Rose, the Balleroo Rose Scaning Party. Mechanics by B.I. Day, Loube by night. No, that was that one. We just watched. Are you just saying his name? type in Stephen Jeffries. Is that what this is? This is his poor name.

Sam Ritter? Yeah. Latin Crotch Rockets. Not that one. Honk Hotel? Nope. Leather after midnight? Nope. Is that a remake?

No, that's the original. Man Hunt. Maybe. Transsexual prostitutes too? No, I'll tell you what. I did watch, I read the book of that one and I couldn't guess they made the movie better. He's always after, he's really insecure about his hair.

He's losing his hair. I mean, but he's not insecure about sticking his face in another man's butthole. I mean, burying it in there. Yeah, I mean, if you don't have hair, you have to worry about. So like keep going. Didn't say anything about his move.

Jake, the same as his move happens to be licking guys assholes while they jerk off from behind. That is his move. Because I don't watch gay porn, but is that a thing a lot? It's the cockpit. That's it, Christine. That's the one for sure. I passed that one, I didn't say it, but.

I think that's the one, Bobby. Are you sure? I think. I'm not sure. I wish I could tell you I was more sure Well, we don't have to watch the whole thing. I thought you know, is there some acting actually turn it up if you wouldn't mind. Oh there we go It's DJ Lou. Are you the guy from heaven help us? I love that they didn't put a mic over with their acting right now. They just have no sound. You ever suck. You ever suck a man's bike? They just got room mic on a fucking camera. Hey, why don't you throw that, throw that

schmotto on your head and come over here and tongue my ass. Fucking tarot. It's like Brendan Sagalo Instagram video just no sound That's a weird penis right there the cock Key grip couldn't come in this day That's not cool. Oh, that's not cool. Is this what women go through? God can't just go pay for his cockpit. He can go pay for his flying lessons without these guys objectifying his ass. Men are assholes. We really are. Men are such dicks. You know the gay ones. Even the gay ones are just so mean. Fade out. Fade out. Way too long pause. Oh, he's just Okay, well, that's not cool either. No, you don't just jerk off in a massage place

Don't start jerking off. This is my technique next time I get a massage though, by the way She's gonna come in. I'm just gonna be jerking off Sir, I'm a doctor. This is sports medicine Like come on, you don't mean it Spreading because the only way my knee feels better, miss. I haven't. Trying to loosen up that cartilage, you know what I mean? Yeah, my ACL feels better when I do this.

What is he doing? He's jerking off. That's how people with big weeners jerk off. Yeah, well, that's not how I jerk off. Yeah, I'll be honest, I don't either. I don't hold. I'll tell you what he's doing that I find interesting and This would be a fun color topic unfortunately people who jerk off on

An orthodox because some people did what he's doing right there that weird like gathering under his balls of his hand Well the other one jerks off is a very specific weird thing this guy's going euro grip See what I mean everyone's got a different thing. This isn't the role where Skates won. Sorry to say. No, this is not. But he is gonna get butt fucked here. Christine, if you can skip ahead to the butt fucking please.

I'll describe it for the audience. That guy's got a long skinny right there. I mean, oh boy. Ah. Oh, he's got, oh. He's got really crazy ass stuff. Oh, oh, oh. Oh, he's got that. Ow. He's got really crazy ass stuff. Ow. Ow.

Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. This looks like this. Ow. This looks like a camera inside somebody's ear. The worst thing I've ever seen is it looks medical.

It's medical. Everything's so shiny and wet. I mean, these guys, the production value of this warrant is just terrible. Let it be known though, Steven Jeffries, aka, whatever, Ritter. Yeah. Jack Ritter. Oh, Jack Ritter is from Three's company. The John Ritter. Oh, sorry. Jack Tripper.

Jack Tripper. You're right. Did he take? Jack Tripper. Oh. That was I'm sorry. You're right. Did he take Jack tripber? Oh, that was gross. Oh God Jay what are the odds? You don't pull out duty want a fucking condom 60 60 I believe there's a better. Yeah You think every time he pulls out no dukey on the economy is like nice. Yeah Hang on here dialogue Right Yeah Hang on here dialogue Right

Okay, did they're formulating a plan is this a heist movie? By the way finally I got a good butt fuck making the noise as I thought you'd make oh Christine please bookmark it and go away from this. Yeah, we need to roll skating I'm a really Christine put it in favor to move on I was terrible It was terrible. We need to no member. They were upset the first week. We were talking too much porn But this is gay porn. This is woke shit This is woke shit. Okay, Jay.

Jay, this is... Jay was rolling his sleeves back then, and he's so upset. He doesn't want to get it on him. Why am I hungry? I don't know, man. I am too. Yeah, I want to smoke a cigarette. I'm packaged.

I'm very packaged right now. I want to get home and jerk off with a hand-coupping my balls. I want to jerk off with my hand-coupping my balls. I wanna jerk off with my whole hand. It's a reverse grip. Yeah, I wanna go from my tank all the way to the helmet. Damn, you just jerk off normal overhand DJ Lou. Knee spread. I don't wanna talk about it right now. Why would happen?

Why do you wanna talk about it? Is there a time we can schedule that in? Yeah, after the smell of gay sex leaves this room, I'll talk about it in an hour. Why, you worried you're gonna get hard? Yeah, it's a worry about. You worried about, you're very gonna relive that night. What happened, dude?

You get butt fucked by the kids and having help us? You say that when you were holding your knees up to your chest, where you're like, are you think I have an help us? I don't need alcohol. This is crazy. I'm sorry, though. I know you had a tragic night with Bruce and Chris. Chris and Chris, that's their names. I'm sorry that happened to you. Yeah, me

too, dude. You never got to see the undercarriage view of what was happening to you that night. It looks as bad as it felt, didn't it? They both had hats on. I shouldn't have had a scene. Any of it. You still smell it, don't you? You still smell that night? Yeah, smells like mustard and pennies. The first time I've ever seen gay sex was in here because you put it on the TVs and the second time, the second time is from a bird's eye point of view. The second one was from underneath a man. At a scotch and his ass. Okay, heaven help us. What are you doing back there? You fishing around? I thought you guys said you had alcohol. You guys drink me.

I don't know what he was looking for, but he definitely took a long time and didn't find it. Oh, fuck. God damn, can't get a point so funny. Gay porn is, but that it's sad that they, um, they didn't have the sound and the lighting, the technology. I think you're gonna say it's sad that they uh... they didn't have uh... the sound of the lighting the technology is a sad that his career took that path no that's fine that's perfect what else is going to do i want to how much money

he got paid to do that is he still matters he did i think he's according to the looking at i am db i think he's trying to i think he stopped doing gay porn and like two thousand seven it looks like he's doing b trying to, I think he stopped doing gay porn in like 2007. It looks like he's doing B trying to get back into real. That's why I love where we're at now as a society because you could have that on your record and come back and do TV and movies and nobody cares anymore.

I mean, that's pretty cool. If he comes back and does something, we should get him on. Can we get him on? Can we talk to him? Yeah, I'd like to see if we should get him on can we get him on can we talk to him? Yeah, I'd like to see if we can get him on put that out there to everybody I should tweet him right should I tweet him yeah, tweet him right now no spell check Christine fine forget spell check Ask him if he would mind promoting my special. I'll put that out while you're in there see if you'd promote my special Everybody William Ragsdale fell off the, though, too. Who's that?

Not William Ragsdale. Was that who played, uh, yeah, that was in Friday night, right? That was William Ragsdale. Oh, was that, no, no, no, no, no, no, the vampire. Not the vampire, Charlie. Oh, the vampire, the shit. Charlie Brewster. Charlie Brewster was William Ragsdale, who's also Herman's head.

Yeah, he fell off. He fell off hard. He felt not hard. Well, not as hard as the other one. Get it? And that's my thing when I get a good job. Well, tell you what, when William Ragster was out the game doing probably nothing, Steven Jeffries was getting butt fucked for cash.

Making a living. Yeah, so he's still earning. Churning and burning and earning. Is there a union for point stars? No. Good question though, right? I don't think there maybe there is. This gotta be something.

There's something they can go to that one. They go to that doc to Steven Jeffries. There used to be that a doctor lady who was in porn with that super long neck and she talks about making sure everybody doesn't get AIDS at her clinic in Vegas I think or LA adult performance artist skilled formerly known as the adult performers actor is skilled They're not going to call them actors anymore American Union for sex workers involved in any aspect of the adult industry Taking over from Sean Michaels. It's president from 2018.

Armored has been a Lana Evans. Let's see what the president of the guild is. Oh, good, good, good. Uh, I'll refer you to a Lana Evans, my union rep. Uh, what she can do. She's gonna suck you. She's gonna fuck you. She's gonna toss you salad. She's gonna put a finger up your butt. She's gonna suck your balls that you come on her face 1100 union members. I can't find him on Twitter. Me at least probably not on he's gotta be on the spell had you spell it You don't have to I'm dumb we get it one of these is him go down and see his Actor Fright night. That's I know it doesn I could put that to I have that on my Twitter go down.

Let's see. More does he is the anything personal. This is very great though. Christine was like it says actor Fright night right here. Okay. He's posting. He saw Elton John. That's gay.

That's 2015. Yeah. Elton John was loved then. Um, that's gay in whatever year. Yeah. Billy Joel. Bill Joe gay. Tweety. J.J. This guy's not involved check his Instagram. Maybe he's on the Graham. He's got to be on the Graham.

We're going to find Stephen Jeffery. He's got David. We're going to find him and he's going to tweet about. He's going to he's going to do something about your special. Yeah. And he's got it. You know, it's funny. I should let him like suck my asshole, but then like with his teeth like pull out a thing like and as he pulls out to pizza paper that says one million views. Yeah. I look back and I'll be like, what?

Yeah. And then it's having him turn around with like his face all damp from my asshole and go, you're so cool, Brewster. There he is, right there. There he is, dude. Still got his butt hole sucking lips. Where is this guy?

It was so good. It was a great movie. The remake was one of the shittiest things ever. Who did the remake, I forget? Colin Ferrell's the where or the vampire, and then who's the remake? I forget Colin Ferrell's the where or the vampire and then Who's the kid and evil Ed is Mick love it. It was so bad. It was such a shitty cast thing Yeah, the remake of pets cemetery too. These are classic scary movies that they turn into like Special effects bullshit. You know what scary movie that looks good that's coming out and I think it's a TV show is the evil dead

That's a movie is it a movie with is the evil dead. That's a movie. Is it a movie with the mom? Evil Dead Arise. Did you see the trailer for that? With a little girl looks through the people. Yeah, it's her mom. So yeah, yeah, it's creepy as shit. They are the moo.

That looks scary. When I was a kid, one of my early memories, I have a couple. I loved horror movies, loved watching them. They scared the living shit out of me and I would have a hard time sleeping for months. The movies that I remember got me really bad. Pet Cemetery was more than for sure. Poltergeist, the scene that the guy pulled his face off.

And I never saw Evil Dead one or two until I was probably in my 20s, just because all I remembered from evil dead was the and you look it up the card scene I all I remember was brief I was like 10 or 12 when I saw this and the card scene is where she's trying to guess what could remember this from evil dead you ever see this it's the first time I think one of them turns into a dead dead eye? Yeah, but she starts reading off the names of the cards like she's telepathic. It's so fucking scary. Okay, I guess we just watched commercials on YouTube now.

No, they did log in as you. We look like fools. I so were watching the, there's a girl with a turtle neck that's the biggest turtle neck I've ever seen in my life. Hey, Ash, I guess the card right. Yeah, true or no? And he, Bruce Campbell, is producing the next one. He is.

Yeah, he's a producer, and so same, really. It's a seven. I don't believe it! I'm spade. Queen of spades. Four hearts. Eight of spades. 4... ...hives. 8 of spades. 2 spades!

Jack of diamonds! Jack of clubs! I have you disturbed my sleep. Or I can thus remind you. I was 12. I'm a shit my pantsie. I don't do it. I mean, this is terrible. Yeah, but it's like ridiculous and hindsight. Yeah, because there's a window behind her holding her up You know when you could pull apart special effects. She's dead center of it also. Yeah, you see a hand in a all black I Tell you what when I grew up the the movie was exorcist came out when I was a little kid.

I think it was in second grade or something like that. It came out when I saw it. And I wasn't supposed to watch it. And I watched it. And it fucked me up. And my sister, who I love now, the back then was evil. She's earned it. We had a little tiny staircase in the back of our house.

We lived in a second floor apartment. And we had a little tiny, when it was a our house. We lived in a second floor apartment. And we had a little tiny, one of those little back door staircases that you go up. We didn't go up the front door, one of the back door. And she would stand up above it, because she would get home from school before me. And every time I was walking up a little dark staircase, she would roll her eyes back into the back of her head

and stand at the top and go, hey, welcome home, buddy. And I would fucking scream and run out to the backyard. And probably do drugs. 15 to 8 dirt once on a spoon. 15 to 20 minutes come back in thinking that's enough time for it to knock this shit off. And muster enough courage to come back in the house. She'd do it five or six more times.

Really? I wouldn't get upstairs for all hours. Just keep you out of the house. I would be screaming at her at the bottom. Please, just let me come up. I wanted to just get up and have a cereal. But I could have- One thing though, if she was just like,

one of the fucker bully friend or something, would just keep you out of the house. She goes, no, I just gotta roll my eyes and freaking out. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no the house she goes now I just gotta roll my eyes and freaking out but no no no no no keep jerking yourself off don't get soft body you what is it what then she goes I just bought a 15 more minutes that's how long it takes for me to stop crying try to dry his pissy pants off you know what she was not sure he's gonna step second just wait right here for a second

But the moon got me we've been waiting for you No dude! She's taking off back into the woods I said dude, second Dude, no! Dude, no! There's a poltergeist in the devil! There's a poltergeist. The devil. There's a poltergeist.

My sister looked like her too. Oh, that. She looked like her. She looked like Blair too, which was she had the brown hair. I took my brother to watch the remake, not the remake, but the, you know, they read, put stuff, would I go redux or whatever they put new stuff into it. Directors cut. They put out the theaters.

Yes, man. And my brother was little and I went to go see that and I'm supposed to not, you know, I'm his older brother. I'm cool, but that scene, they added in when she does the backwards walk down the top. I'm saying down. The crab walk, the work, and the shoot piece. I was like, I'm like, my little brother's there.

He was like, that was pretty scary. I'm like, yeah, if you're a baby, oh God. I feel like someone's added. I was yeah, they took it out of the first one. I took it out of the first one and they added it back in. I'll tell you what though the exorcist three two sucked three was just a scary as the old lady on the ceiling is one of the scary things. I mean, but even in anything with the old Yeah, I didn't feel this way for a long time. Kurt Mesker used to say this, and I do now completely get it. Something with old people being weird is... gets me. Yeah, the old lady on the ceiling just shimming across really fast.

It just looks over her shoulder, Adam. Fucking kills me, dude. I watched that because I saw two. I saw one fuck me up for life. Two is garbage. Garbage. Doesn't make any sense. So when three came on, I was by myself.

I'm like, I don't know what's this whole shit. I was panicking. I have to cover my ears in my eyes. If I go to a horror movie, I have to cover my ears in eyes. I can't hear or see it. How about they made like a sequel out of like other footage? The Dominion Warner was so bad. Yeah.

They're just like a bunch of cut scenes that they've pieced together. But did they just come out with another exorcist movie? There's one coming out Russell Crowe. The priest, right? Yeah. Yeah, there it is right there. Fuck that.

Look at that. What if you looked up right now and Dan was on the ceiling? Yeah, extra sister was pretty scared. Fuck that. And that ceiling, that's a drop ceiling. That's not supposed to hold anybody I mean that's that's that's styrofoam. I mean you can't you never was like just three. No, you're not hard. Oh, I am Exorcist is three is a great movie great movie and the scene in the with the priest and What's his name George C. Scott in a sunset the youth was you they get around the priests of x's three oh yeah this one there in the

you know they got the original they got the original father Demi they got the original father Demi came back in this and And also the guy, it keeps going back and forth between the original priest and the guy, fun fact, who voices Chuckie. Brad Dorif. Yeah, he's actually, in the three, he's the killer. He's the killer, but he's possessed by the evil father whatever's named Damian.

He's possessed by Satan, who possessed the... Father Damian. Father Damian. Yeah. Yeah, that was pretty scary one. The shining fucked me up, bad. The very ending scene of the shining. The shining did nothing to me.

Yeah? No, I just, you know what it did, it made me afraid to be in empty hotels. Yeah, which we end up doing a lot. Not empty, but I mean, you come home at night from a, dude, a Thursday night, especially when like this hotel's like sleepy and shit like that and you go like Especially I smoke you know cigarette so it's like I'm gonna go outside And smoke a cigarette like if I'm on a two turns of hallway before the elevator I'm like come on man Why do they pick this even carpeting everywhere?

Yeah, but dude you can't they can't be ghosts in a hotel that's only been there for eight years. He's not, you know what I mean? No one's ever said the massacre at the drurian. Yeah, Stephen killed himself here six years ago. At the Hilton Garden Inn. I get it. Why if I pass word? I'll tell you what, 2023 rules. Hotels hotels do scare me being betrayed state of one in Salem

In October the Hawthorne hotel that hotel is from like I don't know I think this fucking 1800s of some shit. Mm-hmm. It's old and that hotel you could feel Something there that hotel scared the shit out I think in Milwaukee you can still stay the hotel where Dom or was like drilling brains and shit You mean his building his building Low income housing no no no the one was you can stand the produs the scariest thing in horror movies to be almost that switch scene right there Why is that why is that scary though? He's just frozen no the it's the switch the way they do it is brilliant. The ending of the shining Okay, Jack Nicholson's frozen. He's getting his ass eaten by evil Ed from 976 evil and heaven heaven help us

great comedy I think all this comedy work the cockpit boys I think all this comedy work the cockpit boys slamming in my cram for Sloppy and C7 Cruising on the cruise ships come on my bottom four abs. I'm like you might ask again eight Bufoon a backwards hat. Which is a bit of a rom-com. It's just what I goo. Just what I goo.

All that gizz. And all that gizz. It's a musical. I could be never made a game. And all that gizz I can't get some musical I can't get some musical I can't get some musical I can't get some musical I can't get some musical I can't get some musical I can't get some musical

I can't get some musical I can't get some musical I can't get some musical I can't get some musical I can't get some musical I can't get some musical He's eating out my starfish. And all that gizz. Wow! There was sound in the conversation.

Well, you're not going to eat my ass from over there. Get your butt over here. Why don't you do one ske-do over to my two? If you know what I mean. Ha ha ha. One, two, three. Look at me. I'm sucking down your BB. Hey.

Ha ha ha ha. Where should I put all my gizz? Well, I got a place for you, Sam. Ha ha ha ha. Oh my god. I'm butt-fucking-976 evil. Dog-bent. And all that, gizz.

Two million views. We already did it. Can you believe it? Oh my god. I'm butt fucking 9-7-6 evil. Dog battle. And all that, J.S. Two million views. We already did it. Can you believe it?

It's Thursday and we've already had two million views. Woo! What a crazy three days it was. Woo-hoo-hoo! Woo-hoo-hoo! Woo-hoo-hoo! Oh! Oh!

Oh! I was like, yo! Hey, yeah! I listen to that one over and over again. Yeah! Oh I was like yo I always went over and over and over. Oh my god Yo, and I was like you What trash That gets me Everybody thanks for listening that was just a portion of our actual serious XM radio show. If you want the whole thing, go to seriousxm.com slashbombfire for a special offer.

That's right, and go to bigjcomedy.com and robbercallylive.com to check out our standup dates. Coming to a city near you. I stepped on your crackle crackle, I stink. I stepped on your crackle crackle, I stig.