The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Hypnotic Failure (feat. Zac Amico & Chris Faga)

Episode Date: August 24, 2022

Zac Amico and Chris Faga join The Bonfire! DJ Lou tells the gang about getting hypnotized by a friend's girlfriend to try to quit smoking and that opens up debate on whether hypnosis has any basis in ...reality.Stream "The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson & Dan Soder" for 3 months free on the SiruisXM app! Offer Details Apply: www.SiriusXM.com/BonfireFollow us on all social media @TheBonfireXM@DanSoder www.DanSoder.com@BigJayOakerson www.BigJayOakerson.com@ZacIsNotFunny https://gasdigitalnetwork.com/gdn-show-channels/zac-amicos-midnight-spook-show/@ChrisFromBklyn https://gasdigitalnetwork.com/gdn-show-channels/high-society-radio/

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Starting point is 00:00:00 And now the bonfire with big J. Okreson and Dan Soder. What's up everybody, it is the bonfire, FactionTalk series XM103. Yeah. I forgot to fan send another crazy politician ad. Oh, today? Yeah. A good one. Yeah, we got it, we can look at it.
Starting point is 00:00:18 Very, very nice. I'm Big J. Okreson, that's Dan Soder. We got the whole crew. We got the whole crew here. Jacob's from Florida, of course, but he's here in Spirit and I mean genuinely in spirit is surrounded by a glow of light look at this guy Florida do him right on it. Yeah, man Jacob works for it. Nice. Absolutely We have our black king the black tiger Lewis
Starting point is 00:00:43 Christie Murray Evans DJ Lou We have guests hanging out. That's a very guesty week. Guest week, dude. The opposite of Himbos, though, maybe. He's just a friend. Yeah, this is the total opposite of yesterday's show. If Josh and Justin, if you went the... Whole different direction. Yeah, it would be our guest today.
Starting point is 00:01:00 Two guys who have podcasts that can stick. Ah! Those guys have jumped in the right podcast game now. The Himbos Shaar eyes. This is Josh and Justin with trying it one more time. Yeah, this ought to work. That's what the original title was. It's going, we're at our wits end, the podcast. Josh and Justin with everyone else has one.
Starting point is 00:01:22 I don't get it. What if we had our shirts off? That's what we did. We took their one. I don't get it. What if we have our shirts off? That's what we did We took their ethos Yeah, we lean your shirts off and then it's gonna it's gonna work fantastically. Yeah shirtless men in an audio medium and really dude Is there a dumber way to do it? I don't think so They're filming today. Yeah, they're holding us. Yeah. Oh, we can get don't the way we can get those bods in what say Jacob They're not filming today. So where are we going to do the M. Light?
Starting point is 00:01:49 Yeah, then why do we have the fucking space lights on what I was told no maybe it's a mistake Maybe I was no because they're not moving. You don't see sky net moving. Oh Yeah, they move usually. So let's have a hang fucking lighting. Yeah, All right. Yeah. What's all motherfuckers? Take your dicks out. Yeah. Now we're fucking rocking and rolling our guests. Everybody, they'll be performing together. Comedy to Carlson and Rochester.
Starting point is 00:02:14 Great. That is Christine the plug. Please. Saturday, August 27. That's this Saturday, everybody. Be sure you also check out high society radio and sex midnight spookook show both in the guest digital network as well as buy guys notes from a goon These guys are busy fucking dudes. It's hilarious. Zach Amiko and Chris Faggot everybody Thank you, Ramachon. Yeah, dude. Thanks for doing it. Yeah, you came in at a good time Zach got to hear the whole thing. You didn't hear it all Chris,
Starting point is 00:02:45 but yesterday I played a video on my buddy John Carden. You met John actually in a Phoenix with me, I believe. Oh, okay. And John should be the shyest, stalwarts campaign for mayor ad. And the song is a fucking banger. It's a banger. It's actually the song where you're like,
Starting point is 00:03:01 oh my god, I played it today. I liked it so much, I screen recorded it and clipped it. So it're like oh my god. I played it today. I I liked it so much I screen recorded it and clipped it so it's just in my photos Just the coaches the hook really just want to hear the hook This woman should have been mayor and she's not she lost her mayor or run in 2021 To an old bitchy black guy, but did you hear the song at all? Not at all play a little bit Chris give me a little taste Vote for me for my temple in prayer, Ginda. My name is Tyra Stauher. Breathe it in.
Starting point is 00:03:32 I'm just a bit of simple. Love the people of my point. My name is Tyra Stauher. I think if we have Crackle Paloza, she does this live. Oh my God. If we finally do that show at the Grammar Sea with all the musical acts from the Bond Fire. So the people, a boss point. And young enough to do, the job is here. My name is...
Starting point is 00:04:00 If you want to see a change, don't be the blank. We can tie a nation for for innovation for job creation for My name is Hey for by the campaign to like star was thought vote for my mom on April 6th 2021 her daughter before you left might not have eyes We think there might have been some sort of haunted Japanese horror movie that you watch. Did she on purpose say duck campaign? Uh, probably not. Actually, there was. I don't want to know if it says on the flyers duck campaign for it.
Starting point is 00:04:34 There was a little white guy next to her going, you know, we found it tracks better in certain neighborhoods if you use DA and not the key HE. You'll know. Yeah. Yeah. What's the other one that was sent to to I DMed it to the bonfire Twitter and she's running for the mayor of Phoenix not to replace Wendy Williams Yeah, that's not for the new time slot the mayor of Moss Point, Mississippi. Yeah, so she's running for and she lost but Gonna be on Sherry Shepherd show the third episode. She should be they taught just gonna be like the last scene in time Cop, or they just
Starting point is 00:05:08 Like oh my god. Yeah, so this a campers at it and what what was it? Pay the person does the song to come and do it for my name is Daniel soda I'm really scared when I wake up. I think it has to do with anxiety He's just keeping his simple, wears wrestling and t-shirts. There's a guy named Robert Prince Mongo Hodges. Who sent this in? What's the guy's name?
Starting point is 00:05:35 Cam, let me look. Cam, well thank you, Cam. Classic Prince Mongo. He ran 990s. That doesn't look like a Prince Mongo. Yeah, well apparently he runs in the every Memphis, mayoral elections since 1978. It has a independent, sometimes intermittently running
Starting point is 00:05:53 for mayor of Shelby County. Can you find if he's got any commercials? That would really be. That sounds like the highest title out of special needs problem. Prince Mongo. You are Prince Mongo and he he goes you love me. Yeah, it's a whoever kid whoever finishes Edward 40 hands.
Starting point is 00:06:08 Yeah, his Prince Mongo. Prince Mongo or they just battle him. He's a real Prince Mongo. He who pulls the fork from the electric outlet. And forever be known. Did you ever do an Edward 40 hands? Yeah. Did you I Chris you for sure did.
Starting point is 00:06:24 Yeah, you have some tight duct Chris you for sure did you have Tight duct tape dude never done it. It sucks because you really have to piss No, that's the thing that sucks. It's all about pissing You got to have a girl there that'll hold you and you can't for you You can't piss until you just can't take your hands off. Oh right because you got 40s So the strategy is you just nail one yeah, but then depending on who you're with They'll make you keep it empty. Yeah, you have to keep the whole but if you you know slick tongue kind of talking I mean how many did badlands do the day he showed us what do you do five 40s or 10 minutes?
Starting point is 00:06:55 Something like that some crazy. What kind of 40s? Molecular old fuck you. He was Ellie. I mean, you know badlands booker the guy the chug shit. Yeah He's our boy I did a movie with him. He's the man. I've known him for a long time. But he was a skank sometimes, right? No, it's different guy. He chugs giant.
Starting point is 00:07:12 Dude, it's crazy. I've seen Badlands on YouTube. So he's my favorite. But he makes a ton of money on YouTube. And it'll chug the dust boot of shit. But they'll demonetize them if there's alcohol cause he's considered binge drinking. Yeah, but he came to do high-sighted radio.
Starting point is 00:07:30 He hung out with us all night. Yeah. And oh boy, he showed us the alcohol videos from back in the day. I think it was five, 40s and 10 minutes. Yeah, he was chugging that. He made me look like a real asshole. We tried to do truck bombs and he really made me look like a bitch.
Starting point is 00:07:42 Oh yeah, he probably was a truck bomb. He was sipping like. Yeah, yeah. I looked like a little boy. with a truck bomb Chris. It's a full picture again It's with a pint of James and Jesus Oh a truck bomb just like a car bomb. Yeah, and car bombs are a fucking problem. Yeah, you do you drink all of it? I did finish it. Yeah, you did were you out after that? No, I was fine. You were fine You weren't I, I was fine. You were fine? You weren't fine. I mean, I was hammered.
Starting point is 00:08:06 I took over home that night. I rarely do that. You were like that bad. You were like damn dude. You guys would be like, yeah, Christopher. He'll get home fine. Like, Zach, was it worried about me? How did you attack this truck bomb?
Starting point is 00:08:19 Just chug. Yeah, just chug at his fat. I mean, that's the one when I was like real good. Because you put that fucking Bailey's in there when I was really binge drinking a lot That was the car bomb was my move. It's car bomb. I would do that is the that would be a ketchup move Yeah, yeah, if I got off work late and people were out drinking I do like three car bombs Yeah, there used to be a less
Starting point is 00:08:38 Where they're there? You know, let's be in the last drunk the least drunk person. It's like let's it's being on a room full of retarder people Yeah, that's what I am now all the time. It's like not being on acid with people You know that man you just watch people get real dumb and you're just like a bad lady Showed us doing him like the entire handle of Yeager And we're like what do you do after he's like I took a nap? Oh my god He's does a fear he's an animal had your body process that without dying or puking He's a you truck bomb isn't safe.
Starting point is 00:09:06 He didn't fit through the door, it guess. Get a walk inside with us. Dude, I used to just do them. Well, like not truck bombs, but I used to do car bombs. There used to be a lesbian bar in Park Slope that had $4 car bombs called gingers. And if people, I was just- That was the proof that women really can't drive.
Starting point is 00:09:19 Yeah. But I would sneak in there, like we were at other bars because if people were too drunk, I'd be like, I couldn't deal with it. I would sneak out and like we were at other bars because if people were too drunk I'd be like I can't I couldn't deal with it I would sneak out and just slam a couple of car bombs in the dyke bar and head up the head back to whatever bar my friends were at You guys are fun again. Yeah, they kick you out because you call it a dyke bar And they're like you've had too many car bombs you get out of here. Hey, dyke hold me no one of them jingers I'm gonna tell you this last time buddy
Starting point is 00:09:44 I'll feed you this stuff because you're like a goddamn donkey. All right, sorry, sir. Okay, to my favorite, one of my favorite moments is after a live at Gotham, Big J was there and we went to smoke a cigarette after my set and I was like, coming down or whatever and J's like, let me buy you a shot.
Starting point is 00:09:58 Let's go get a shot. And we were, it was that Gotham, so we were in Chelsea and we walk over this bar empty. It's like seven PM onm. on a Thursday. It's pretty empty, and we walk in, and Jake goes, I forget exactly how you said it, I think you went, hey girlfriend, can I get two shots of Jack Daniels, and the guy goes, I'm nobody's girlfriend.
Starting point is 00:10:16 It's got, we're good. So serious for no reason. What's up girlfriend? And you said it completely jokingly, but that guy was like, shut the fuck up. I get that too much. But a truck bomb dude, it seems like you would do it and then 30 minutes later you'd just be like,
Starting point is 00:10:30 all right, everything's shutting down. I think it would die. I think it's just too much alcohol. A pint glass of jams. No, it's half jams in and then half. No, it's like a big rock slice, but a small like a high ball. You said a pitcher, a pitcher again.
Starting point is 00:10:43 Pitcher again, that's not that bad,. It's a pitcher again. It's is yet That's not that bad, but it's the fucking whiskey. That's the what's half Bailey's and you know Bailey's is fine, but that curdling dude because if you if you do a car bomb slow enough and you start getting those bubble chunks But I'm not yeah, I'm not doing it. You just gotta get it down Yeah, there's a viral video recently of a Mexican dude doing 50 shots of Patron Going down the bar and then it's like this bone drop like 20 minutes later and it's him
Starting point is 00:11:10 Dead getting carried out. Yeah, it's him just completely gone to the world Yeah, what was that bar downtown people used to go into they had 10 shots for 10 dollars the continent I mean they demolished it good. He was fucking great You get off the sixth train and be like I'm gonna go to shoot I kicked out of there for not drinking enough He's connettled. You're just good. They demolished it. Good. He was fucking great. You get off the sixth train and be like, I'ma go do some shots. I kicked out of there for not drinking enough. When I was 19, I was asked to leave because I didn't buy drinks. Connettled.
Starting point is 00:11:35 I performed there once. Really? Yeah. Me and Kurt did a show there, put on by the guy, John Joseph, this lead singer, the Chrome eggs. Yeah, man. It's the weird meeting we had when I was younger that guy's coming to my life in such Like odd times John Joe cool guy, man, but like he asked me me in courtesy the show for him
Starting point is 00:11:53 And he goes you guys got my new year's Eve party. So me Kurt his girlfriend me and Carla Go down the disparties and it's cool loft way downtown But there's like Sambo pictures on the wall all that stuff was like art. It was all art stuff. It was like really weird art. Yeah And what's what was sweet guy him as his get it yet a it's crazy find out someone's Terrible through their artwork. Yeah I mean if you're in the art, I mean it is like it's got a history I don't think I don't think he's kind of like black people. I think he has it as like art. Because it's like,
Starting point is 00:12:27 it didn't shock you. And you're like, ah, now I know. Oh, he didn't paint it. No. And he also didn't strike me as like a racist guy at all. In fact, he's, no, I'm enough to say, I think he's not. No, I wasn't even saying right. It's just like, you see different stuff
Starting point is 00:12:39 in paintings where you're like, and you just like this. It's kind of like, it's like, make your children. It's kind of like a swastika's all over Jacob's house. Yes, exactly. It's kind of like that. children. It's kind of like a swastika's all over Jacob's house. Yes, exactly. It's kind of like that. He's got a lot of swastika books. Had a draw swastika. The place where the guy used to,
Starting point is 00:12:51 the owner used to sit out in front with the raiden hat. Oh, really? Do you remember, if you were in the village, and if there was always a guy walking around with the hat like raiden from Mortal Kombat, that was the owner of Continental. He was an owner. He was an asshole. Really. You know, yeah,
Starting point is 00:13:07 he's a mean guy. He's a really mean prick, right? Yeah, I told him mean prick. And he just wear that hat all over the village. You know, he sit out front. I didn't know he's the owner. I thought he was like a bouncer. No, no, he owned it because he was the fuck. And he was just a dickhead. Yeah, he's a fucking dick. I used to go. My parents, he has to deal with, he has to deal people who are getting five shots for 10 bucks No, 10 shots for 10 bucks. Yeah at one point I think We would do five for 10 there and then across the street grassroots you can get $9 picture
Starting point is 00:13:35 I started coming to New York though. I think when I did that place it was 10 for 10. Yeah, it was crazy 100% well alcohol, but like if you're just going to get fucked up It was exactly what you wanted great Yeah, pretty fantastic, I guess but And then I was gonna say that John Joseph guy the other time I ran into him again was hanging out with Steve O He's like Steve O's like vegan Sherpa That's so weird that you know me and my friend used to follow him and had to stop because he's like motivational stuff online gets to be like a little
Starting point is 00:14:03 much had to stop because these motivational stuff online gets to be a little much. Yeah, he's all like meets for pussies. And like it's like books like that. I love the aggressive vegetarian. Yes, he very much is very angry at you for not being a vegetarian. The alpha vegetarian. He's like, you know what's more male than plants, nothing, bro. They're fucking so strong. Plants are the strongest.
Starting point is 00:14:23 Uh-oh, the real Anthony Fauci. Please, some of this says underneath of it. What if it's a heartwarming look at Anthony Fauci? Bill Gates. This is him at home in a sweater. Yeah, he goes, honestly, guys, the fucking cuddle bear. Turns out he likes beagles. Yeah, many don't follow the timeline of events
Starting point is 00:14:39 when it comes to this dude, Fauci. First, everything that was stated about him was called conspiracy theories. Then this book came out. First everything that was stated about him was called conspiracy theories. Then this book came out and it was proven. So Fauci crawled into a hole and hit, took himself out of the press, stopped giving his narcissistic, multiple daily interviews. Everything in this book is backed up with data and source. When is this post from? This is his Instagram, he posts up and that. This is Charles Joseph, Lisa from the Chromeags.
Starting point is 00:15:08 Like when did he write this post? Because Fouchy's been on TV all week. This is his second month's recent post. Yeah, he just did it. I don't have that channel. What channel was he on? I didn't see him. From page news.
Starting point is 00:15:22 This Chromeags? If you read in the lame stream media. Well, if you listen to listen was lyrics you get us politics Are you a pro max fam never my thing yeah me either what's this I just he's another post he makes where it's like this person's clean and sober Oh, I think those pictures in the opposite order Yeah, the graduate college then you fucking rip it. Then you get going on your method. You don't just get good skin after meth.
Starting point is 00:15:49 Yeah, never pops back completely. I'd have to say, I was gonna have the fucking James Woods cheeks. Yeah, you stretch that rubber band too far, especially you pick it all like that. Your skin doesn't want to be good for you. Yeah, when you get all sucked in, but then you get like,
Starting point is 00:16:03 when you get weight on a sucked in face, it's even weirder All right, let's not go into the wormhole of John Joseph's Crazy bleep melt touch more Binds in there. Bind made them out rush more touch more. Yeah, Cosby Weinstein Epstein Close by Joe Biden even if you're gonna go Democrat, don't you go Clinton? You can't really. Yeah, that's the draw. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:29 You know, Biden. By the way, could you find, the only fantasy? I love Randy Savage, but he's no Hulk Hogan where he did this business. Yeah, Biden doing that, that's fucking Sam Hagar. That's not fucking David Leroth. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:16:40 But they really pulled in, like, I mean, like, there's no picture, by the way, of Epstein that's not sinister looking. The guy has no smiling pictures. No, he does like male duck lips. He's always trying to look sexy for the camera. Yeah, he's always given that face, but they couldn't have got more pleasant pictures of Harvey Weinstein and Bill Cosby.
Starting point is 00:16:59 Has to know Cosby, I know I love up there. He wouldn't do anything like that. Come on. You look like a little mealtime in this app, but in the boopin' in the pop-up. Oh, the stuff about the time and those go to all of this neighborhood. I had a weird revelation the other day. So I've told this story a lot of bunch of stuff.
Starting point is 00:17:13 My first job out of college, I worked for a movie company doing security for test screenings. Okay. And one day they pulled me off the job and they're like, hey, we need you to hang out in this room. There's gonna be a meeting and you need to make sure nobody interrupts it. And it was the Weinstein's. Damn.
Starting point is 00:17:31 So it was just me and fucking Harv Dog for a little while. Big Harv Dog. Yeah, no idea what you would have done for a part. Oh boy, it was me, Harv Dog and Bob. Because do you ever eat come off plants? And they eat each other. It would be the first time Zach ate a plant. That's how you get me.
Starting point is 00:17:49 They just screamed at each other and I remember Harvey Weinstein's assistant brought him a suit because he had sweat through his suit screaming. Damn. Jesus. And I was like, oh yeah, I have this weird little Harvey Weinstein story.
Starting point is 00:18:01 And I was talking to my chick about it. And I was like, oh, because I used to act when I was a kid. And I did something for the Amanda Bunn show.V. One's in story and I was talking to my chick about it and I was like, oh, cause I used to act when I was a kid and I did something for the Amanda Bond show. Yeah. And I went, oh my God. Just what I went. I think I worked for Dan Schneider too. Dan always the brides made Jesus.
Starting point is 00:18:17 You can't get hit even if you walk right up to it. I did a thing for the band to bond show and I remember the whole cruise. And then in my head, I'm like, you've repressed the memory of working for Dead Schneider, haven't you? Yeah, you also worked for Schneider and once. You definitely got whacked off in that toe pool. Yeah, dude, you're like, are you fucking put your feet on his cock? It happens somehow. You might not have been aware of it. Did you get to go to a socks off party at his house?
Starting point is 00:18:38 But it's also like you stormed the beach at Normandy twice. You just got so close and nothing, either time. Yeah, I can't. Look at him, He would give him all like adult girl haircuts Go back to the other pictures. I had it with him in a man of the bonds It was a guy with his child bride. Yeah, who he supposedly her baby daddy According to some rumors. He's her kid's father. That's why it's never announced who the father is Google it. They have the baby with his face next to it. Oh,. Maybe they didn't get too close to you because they thought you were going to highlander them. Yes, there can only be one. I will touch them. You. It's like Looper.
Starting point is 00:19:15 Yeah. He's wealthy enough to get. Wine thing comes out of you. I know why you're here. Just hurry up and do it. He's wealthy enough to get a hot chick. He's sick, dude. Yeah, 100%. Well, I have a theory about the wine thing. I mean, he's a piece. He's a horrible person, but I mean, uh, but they said in the trial that he was on an injection for erections who wine steam wine steam was oh, yeah, so in that tape I don't think that's an angry man I think that's a man where the clock is ticking. Yeah, And he knows he has about eight minutes left on this boner. He's looking at the time. And this chick is just fucking pulling the brakes.
Starting point is 00:19:49 And he's like, uh, miss. I get one of these a month, I get one of these a month that it's $15,000. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can play whoever you want in the industry. I'm like, that's, I hear we have. Yeah, see people do the, um, the face.
Starting point is 00:20:04 Oh, the kids really? That's a pretty funny. That's funny here we go. Yeah, see people do the face. Oh, the kids, really? That's a pretty funny. That's funny. Well, that's because they never announced. That's because they super fucked up. They never announced who her baby daddy was and that would make a lot of sense as to why not. Damn, the inch center got her pregnant.
Starting point is 00:20:20 Maybe, I mean, it's a dinner. Of course, this is all very. Dennis Blunden. By the way, how did Arvin keep his nose clean? But I'll tell you what he was involved early Nickelodeon Weirdly enough like those two guys together Where the those two guys that were the nerds in the head of the class Worked together Making all that Nickelodeon shit and then somewhere Arvid left
Starting point is 00:20:43 Sick dude, this is too sick. You're fucking jacking off Possibly arvid may have left him been like, yo dude. This is good. I watched all that the other day like three episodes at my check Way too many feet. Oh, that's the whole thing. I've never seen those compilations I know, but I didn't occur to me that it was all that it was such hidden in plain sight Yeah, I wonder if you were close to video village if you just heard him go. Yeah. Yeah. I'm telling you, the thing you remember the girls
Starting point is 00:21:09 like, for no reason, the show is a big, you know, like I Carly big. All right, time to put ketchup on our feet. Yeah. Oh no. Look all this applesauce I gotta stop. Yeah. For these, it's like, fuck.
Starting point is 00:21:21 Yeah. Why don't I push this pedal? It's like what they used to do with secretaries with big boobs and it's offer pencils. It's like what they used to do with secretaries with big boobs They drop their pencils and it's kid with feet where they go. Oh look. There's a little pool Oh, no crickets and dream army men take shoes off and stop on stop them all over Fuckin I think they'd say barefoot did he say his thing in his house was always barefoot parties or something? Sorry, it's time to shoot it. I know the pool
Starting point is 00:21:41 That was the logo right? Yeah, yeah, but still also the logo became a foot Oh, you guys the whole look logo should be a foot guys. I like the splatter ID has been going good for years, but Sorry, I'm sweating so much We make this into a foot like a big a big orange foot a big girls Can we make this into a foot? Like a big, a big orange foot. Like a big girl's foot. Maybe they walk through this gag. Oh gag, gag on your feet.
Starting point is 00:22:10 I'm gonna lose it. I'm gonna come. I'm gonna gag. I'm gonna fucking gag. I'm gonna take dude. That's fucking hilarious. Also him just blaming Japanese culture. Just to, so what, look at feet. Just take your shoes off please. just blaming Japanese culture just so what look at feet. Yes, take your shoes off
Starting point is 00:22:25 Please sorry Oh I call it California license Hey, Dan I found this downstairs because that's just a joke between friends. No, yeah, don't But don't give me that. Don't racist against Japanese Hey, the father father of the world or two. That's that too. You guys give me that back It's not a flip thing here where these wooden sandals
Starting point is 00:22:57 Kind of kind of kind of find your feet Just making Ariana Grande when they made her go bulimic. Yeah, it's just Ariana Grande being sexualized for two minutes straight Pete It's like man, I have some crazy stories about Nickelodeon Apparently it was an eye-fated the doc. It's eye-fated executives And the answer was a resounding yes That is pretty fucking hilarious. She fingers her own throat and chokes on it a little That's hilarious. Sorry. I got a pretty weak gag reflex, but I'm just a little guru Tandie always perverts is running a kids network. You should absolutely if you run a kids network
Starting point is 00:23:36 You should be under constant scrutiny listen, you shouldn't be a male gymnastics coach No for female gymnasts and there shouldn't be guys in charge of Young girls they should send her toes they should send us around like they're toes coach for female gymnasts and there shouldn't be guys in charge of young girls. They should send her toes. They should send us around like they're toes. They should send us around like the A team to like fucking red flag. They're at their cocks. They should all have to wear sheath underwear and nothing else. Yeah, you like don't even do a frig. Christine when we were at Ariana Grande's part, we should have said like, hey, it's very nice to meet you. Nice to see you and Pete. Looks very happy happy together Yo, did Dan what a day?
Starting point is 00:24:06 Schneider dude, Dan Schneider download me what happened? Yeah, tell me right? Yeah Give me the brief come on dude. We transfer it Go ahead are you on it? Yes, you're doing it portal over yourself. I'm a dirty girl. That's a rap I got to go back to my trailer. I'm about. You're a dirty girl. That's a wrap. I gotta go back to my trailer. I'm about to pop like a fucking zit. Yeah, really squeeze it. Squeeze it.
Starting point is 00:24:30 You went that potato to squeeze. Damn, dude, that is wild. It really is hiding in plain sight, though. It was right there. I would have thought, like, these are the shows that like, uh, Isabella watched when she was younger. Like, uh, not all that, but she watched like I Carly. And that was all still that same era of this guy running around.
Starting point is 00:24:48 Yeah, he went, yeah, they're good run. I didn't know Dan Shiner went all the way back to all that because like, that's like, he's the cookin' good burger. Yeah, he's been there since like the 90s. Did he lay, he laid tracks at Nickelodeon? He's like, I will rise and fuck all the liver feet. Yeah. Fucking Nick Cannon had to split because he wasn't down with it.
Starting point is 00:25:08 He was delicious. Gay. I gotta go and pregnant everybody. Yeah, I gotta go to everybody pregnant. You go over here and get him on cushion and nothing to do with him. Yeah, we find that out. What's your real name? Schneider. And he goes, actually, a name I took. What's your real name? He's like, think of Stein. He's gonna get the fuck out of here. I don't want nothing to do with Nick hello. She has bullshit Yeah, they all got it. I mean, I made a bond. It has to be why she's so fucked in the head
Starting point is 00:25:35 I would assume so didn't the original renin's then be creator get it to yeah, I don't know not Bob camp the other guy You have like a intern who was an underage girl He was fucking yeah Damn it dude. What about Rugrats all your big it out? That's classic Casupe. Oh, right? Remember earlier than she went when Dan lost her ratio of sand's delegations God got skinny first and that broke my heart Then the allegations came in the out It's always after a fact I get skinny. That's what happened to Jared too. Yeah, they get hot And then they're like hey, by the way you fuck kids man. Oh, you guys what we would never believe a fatso
Starting point is 00:26:09 Fucked kids. No idea when I was fatter. Oh, man Damn. Oh man He just does the stumpy voice while he's molesting kids. That's what a bummer. He does we'll actually more into red They make him change it Sexual misconduct that means it's like even like a Because I wouldn't be like full on sex. It's just like touching them. Yeah Do you know I mean holding their waist while they color in a stimpy drawing? Yeah, he goes oh that's good Stimpy's a little more red So funny as a girl cuz you always see it's like she was 16. She's 37 and now
Starting point is 00:26:43 It's crazy how much you don't realize how gross that shit is until you're around like 35. And then all of a sudden, you said you never got molested. Ah, Kristen never got molested. You never got molested. Kusingu's, we kept it in the family. No, you weren't molested. Ah, you don't have a sad story. I was just waiting for one of those memories to drop in my 20s where I'd be like, oh, I got fucked in fourth grade. He just did be like, I
Starting point is 00:27:11 was right. My tea. I forgot that my soccer coach made me suck his dick. It is. Counted my ass until I fell like an old shoe. That's why I have such a thing against suburban's. That's where he took me. Damn, everyone's getting it. Brennan's Stimpy creator. Brennan Stimpy creator got it, no one's safe. Well, yeah, he would have like interns that were like 16 and he'd be like, yeah, your artwork is great. You're in like, you like find these girls.
Starting point is 00:27:37 They would like write him fan mail and then he'd give them a job before they were even eight out of high school. Very, very subtle. He'd even need no brown brown like they often draw naked So they don't deal color pencils. Yeah with fucking masks on it with that 95's on okay girls nice nice nice I like what you're doing with yeah, that is that's just a stump. We actually make it look more wood like I'm sorry. I talked to you with this car. There's a powder toast. I've been thinking of okay, listen
Starting point is 00:28:01 There's a powder toast. I've been thinking of. Okay, listen to my lap. So I'm gonna talk to you about this. See, it's like this butt out. Okay, his butt squeezes thing. There's nothing against assumptions, right? Or please no South Park. No, I can think of.
Starting point is 00:28:17 Good. South Park. You'll keep me in the loop. Any South Park? Well, the funniest firing for a cartoon in recent times is Jay Johnson getting kicked off of Bob's burgers because he was at the insurrection. Yeah, openly. No math. It just stoked on it. Do you never got with that was when they were figuring that out and they're like, no, they're like, oh, shit. Oh, he is on. Oh, here he is.
Starting point is 00:28:43 And they were like, and they were like, it's just a guy who looks like you know, there's like no No, no, no, that's totally him. That is too true the herky jerky pants Did that really is and that like realization is the same as when you realize you're seeing a famous person over here Hey, I know you Burn it down I love the bomb, uh, Mr. Show. Yeah, burn it. Yeah, pull that cop out. Fuck that guy. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my Disappearation. Yeah, he lost the job. He was a Jimmy. He was Jimmy Pesto. No, but I'm saying you have that reaction where you go like Get in there. I'm gonna fucking kill Mike. Oh my god Jimmy Pesto. Okay. Here you go. Well
Starting point is 00:29:21 I know that voice. I know that voice. Who does Jimmy Pesto? He's just doing it the whole time. They're evading the Capitol. Dude, can you do Jimmy Pesto? Can you do Jimmy Pesto and say where is Pelosi? Yeah, look, he pulled the mask right off. You're at the interaction, you're like, hey, I hope your husband wins the belt again soon.
Starting point is 00:29:37 Yeah, that's, that's gone. That'd be pretty cool. I'm just saying, they should put him over. It's so weird what like a comedic actor he is and he's so fucking serious in that picture. He really is like pissed. Yeah, he looks, uh. He's like, let's kill a cop.
Starting point is 00:29:54 I have some slapstick humor I have to write. You guys like Xany faces? I didn't know the FBI was just putting people on Twitter. I'm thinking like they may know this guy. That would just so funny. Yeah. Dude, that's so great that you go to FBI headquarters. You're on the farm. And they're like, this is, yeah, actually she runs our Twitter. She's like, Hey, I just caught a couple
Starting point is 00:30:14 criminals. I put their face up. This is on you now. Yeah. I run the most powerful Twitter on in the world. Was that here? Was that last week? Or is it still a photo is a real? And more people saw it. So I got this set of a band. Actually, engagement's much higher at 3 p.m. We said, I'm going to do a, uh, I want to take one amber alert super, super seriously. Just go track it and just turn my life into finding this girl. Where is she? Yeah. As I had late nights in hotel rooms with the board of strings.
Starting point is 00:30:40 You're just drink, you were drinking a cup of coffee with a card game on the outside. Of course. And you're going, I've got to find this coffee with a card game on the outside of course, and you're going I gotta find this girl. It's been three. It's been three days since my phone's gone off. Could you look look? Look at her look at her. Where's the white accord? I told her mother. I'd bring her home Did you know that the FBA has FBI has a podcast guys? Shut the fuck inside the FBI podcast hosted by hosted by Will Silvins and cipher sounds It won 100% better be modulated
Starting point is 00:31:14 He goes on we are a live active agent It's more like you know things are pretty crazy and serious right now aliens are real as real as For him's you hair Also real is for him's hair care products by for him. Better help. In case you're about to get the FBI up your ass. Please don't mail us a bomb but if you do please use stamps.com. Coming up next week we've got a pretty interesting thing. I think I'm gonna get my purpose here. I think I'm running down on. I've been going Donnieny Brasco for fucking 20 years 20 years deep cover. Damn dude Well guy from Bob's burgers have fun in jail. Is he in jail? Did he get sentenced? No, I think he just got fired
Starting point is 00:31:53 Yeah, one of the other guys from mr. Shoe was in one of the later better calls all episodes this season and I was watching them Oh somebody got a not at the insurrection reward Hey, we're gonna need you to come in. Oh, I know you're talking about kind of goofy faced guy. Yeah, happy about that. Do you think if you're a character, actually, like that? And the guy that always you're competing with for roles is at the insurrection, you're like, fuck, hey.
Starting point is 00:32:18 Well, you know you get to play him in the TV movie. Oh, yeah. That's one. Or as a character in the big or in the character in the big Adam eventual Adam McKay insurrection movie, which he'll do. Taking himself too seriously. This is show's cast went all over the place. It's strong. Well, some play Laura Kightlinger gone. She's I don't see her. Tom Kenny. Tom Kenny was Bunch Bob. Yeah. Um, obviously Bob owner Kirk David Cross at a good career. Uh, Jack Black. Jack Black
Starting point is 00:32:52 for sure. Sarah Selverman. Sarah's on for a while. Tom, and then there was a Paul off Tom, because there was that girl that with the bug eyes. Yeah, go to go to the Maryland Rajkab has done real fucking well. Yeah, she really has character acting out the ass. Brian Possein, Jill Talley, that's what I was gonna say. That's Tom Cammy's wife. Oh, she? Yes, she's a bunch of violence. Punch problem as well. So she's just chilling back spinning that spongebob. John Anis is who we were thinking. Yeah, John Anis was on the let the last season. It's all But character acting for sure. Jerry Minor, was it some stuff for a while? He's in the new KKK sketch.
Starting point is 00:33:31 Oh, Dino's to my topless. Guys written on LIDA. You know, Dino? Yeah, Dino did a lot of shit. He starburns from a community. Yeah. Oh, well, I'll just shove that ball bust up my ass. I think he wrote for South work, too
Starting point is 00:33:46 Yeah, well, a jet genetic and draw did nothing she sucks Wow, dude, you're right Sit now, I don't think so he was like he wrote I think I don't remember Old Conan with like Louis and yeah, no, he's on the first staff of Conan Okay, I'm sorry. He's great. I'm stupid. Oh, good. Throw it in your fucking head, man. Throw it in your head. Do you feel better about themselves now?
Starting point is 00:34:11 No, you're fucking... We have been ticking around and not getting to the core of what I wanted to talk about so bad today. Right. We found out last week that DJ Loo was going to be going to a hypnotist to quit smoking. I, Jury's that we already know you, you're having quit smoking. No one thought you were going to, but I'd like to hear the process of what went down. I know there was some ups and downs even going to this one because it was a friend recommendation.
Starting point is 00:34:45 It's a friend's relationship with the person. Oh, so you got a pretend you got hypnotized? It was a female. Your girlfriend's so good at hypnotizing. Dude, she's fucking great. I have a idea. How can we even hung out? Well, it's not because I'm smoking.
Starting point is 00:34:57 It's definitely not. It's totally not because I can't not smoke. It's a female hypnotist, which he's going to get yelled at at home for that. Yeah, he's catching shit for going to Because she loves you. She believes this woman is gonna hypnotize you to be hers and hers only Yeah, that's what that's the problem with dating Latinos is they think that you're gonna be under some sort of sexy spell You have some sort of Spanish girlfriend. What a white woman hypnotize you Yeah, what if you were sure that's what you just speak to her dad. That's how they made love pushing number nine
Starting point is 00:35:25 Yeah, just fucking crazy Lou why are you doing this to me? My hips not hypnotic enough. Hey, she's gonna keep trying I'm gonna read the word of the female hypnotist. Yeah, I gotta be the only one in her class They're like we're're, yeah, okay. You were duped into going to a friend's hypnotist girlfriend. I wasn't duped.
Starting point is 00:35:49 I wanted to go. Yeah, but. Was she wearing a cape? She was on Zoom now. Zoom. I didn't even pay attention to a Zoom podcast. Zoom hypnotist. Go fuck yourself.
Starting point is 00:36:00 Zoom hypnotist I'm out. Your magic's not in the room. Of course. We could probably put it on a YouTube video now get the same effective whatever you got probably could you probably YouTube stop smoking hypnotism on YouTube and watch it yeah well this was a hundred fifty bucks well that's better than damn you know that's the kind of money where she was laughing it as she counted oh my god she's like when I snap fingers, you'll believe you're not a fool.
Starting point is 00:36:25 That's with the friendship discount on. Yes. To not quit smoking. Dude guys, hold on. Let's stop smoking together. Hit the volume. She just hypnotized you in a giving her your money. My name is She transferred that from her Venmo to her bank account, a dollar at a time laughing at you. Yeah. Click. What an idiot. Click. What an idiot. Well, the link in this video is description. And then you go, okay, we're gonna start and wake up. Oh, wow, you're out.
Starting point is 00:36:53 Geez. See if you'll let. We spent two hour session together. Yeah, sure. Yeah, you are. Is it a vaccine? You're gonna quit smoking. And we should, the cravings are over.
Starting point is 00:37:05 You should probably do a follow-up session. You got me old DVDs, wasn't I? The follow-up sessions cost 50 hours more because you know, we gotta make sure that the smoke is gone. If you really want it to work, why don't you give me your social? You're looking at this holographic ring real quick.
Starting point is 00:37:18 Yeah, huh. Do you want to buy some gold, too? Well, we did. When we did it, the first 10 minutes, I was exactly what Chris just said. I'm like, how long do I got a fucking pretend that I'm being hypnotized? You said you were being hypnotized? I didn't feel it at all. Of course. Go big, big, big, big, big, you can't I'm walking the lights getting smaller and smaller. I'm chasing it. Till it's almost gone.
Starting point is 00:37:47 I mean, complete relaxation. She's going, yeah, it's just a Jersey girl too. She's going, yeah, see you're like changing your mind. Yeah, slip into a deep. I'm going to put you on me, you know, like real under, like, you know, black guy living in a white family get out kind. You're going be deeper deeper
Starting point is 00:38:07 Well, how long do you go you go you out hey hey stop smoking moron You're maroon you fucking it is don't say hey, he's a cigarette you mouth. He's a bunch of your face You're mother love your mother loves their column more Don't smoke You mother love your mother loves their column more Think it's a great you mouth punch your face. Yeah, I'm an introduced you to Benson and head I got your patch right here anyway Wake up you get the sweat on my couch For an hour and 15 minutes shut the fuck up. Yeah, and I gotta tell you You were tempted for an hour 15 minutes. I pretended for about 15 minutes
Starting point is 00:38:50 But then when I surrendered to it it kind of worked. I don't like that fucking talk at all When you thought about not smoking a cigarette you didn't have a cigarette while you're in somebody's house Crazy it's like zoom You could have smoked if you wanted I can't smoke during it. You're gonna be like hold on. Yeah, he goes wow I'm totally out Crazy Like Be honest 12 minutes into the shoes like all right just jerk off and say I have Mr. Lou can I be honest No, Mr. Lou, can I be honest? I'm not that good of a hypnotist, but you can jerk off with my boobies. I'm gonna pull my pee any size.
Starting point is 00:39:29 It's really an only fiend. I don't want smoke. I want smoke. I want smoke. I have to. I want smoke. No, smoke. I want smoke.
Starting point is 00:39:41 So you say we used to write there to it, what works? I think I can be hypnotized if I had somebody in the room with me and the person was better. She ASMRed you as all she did. Well, I didn't fall asleep and flew by like it was 10 minutes. Don't smoke. I don't fucking smoke. It makes it really sexy with you don't smoke. Don't suck your dick if you don't want to smoke your cock.
Starting point is 00:40:06 You know what I'm saying? You're gonna buy me two tickets to Bruce Springsteen. Also, you're gonna give me whatever cash is in your wallet. Because you're a roob. And you're also a bang-batter when you bang that a boss ate his stuff. You're smoking more, bro. Lights. What are you? I'm nailing.
Starting point is 00:40:23 You're working on nail sol... So I don't want to get your lipstick on your soda. Smoking more brights. What are you? I'm nail you working on nail so So I don't want to get your lipstick on your social so anyways turns out my boyfriend Ronny But you can stay in this state though I get home. I'm gonna leave some can't for now for you Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. Wait up. He's worth but Do three hours fifty dollars an hour $1 a minute not to smoke while I'm a chain smoker it works out It is I really and what broke you for that cigarette where you like She wasn't even in the room. That's it. My mind was like that wasn't real. That's a stupid Isn't that gonna happen as soon as the regular hypnotist leaves the room? Let him work his way through a Chris
Starting point is 00:41:25 He's figured out. He's letting him get another hypnotist and he goes to the room with him. Why is this my way through Chantix? Yeah, did he walk through Chantix? Why can't we? Isn't that supposed to kill you? Why can't we have him? This is come to it to him here. I would absolutely pay for that.
Starting point is 00:41:36 Could you turn the floor over to them and the audio of them talking? Jacob, you would love that, right? I wouldn't love that. I would have. You got to kill that audio. I'm sorry, you you would love that right Go Jacob sorry you get priority over YouTube this time Good Jacob before I go to YouTube idea I would I would love I would love it put YouTube back up No, I'll be really fuck off No, stop. It'd be really fun. No, fuck off. But enjoy this montage of fail armies, fail the weak lips. I'll rewatch your favorite
Starting point is 00:42:16 commercials from the A.B.s. I think, yeah, that's fucking, I think I'll be really fun to hypnotize DJ Lowe in studio. Do you think there's a chance it could work on the air? I don't think it could work. Why why I can't get to that place. No, you can you can work so you did it on zoom with your cock in your hand You just want us to your friends girl for him to be alone with a lady hypnotist It's not cheating she made me. I don't know fellows. Maybe it was like in a different room or something Maybe if I was wearing something loose fitting I don't want to put it on Maybe if I was chained to a table. Yeah, I was in a robe per se
Starting point is 00:42:51 It was weird. She wouldn't let me lay down and get comfortable I had to sit on the side of my bed and just like slump over in a pretend hypnosis. I feel like I could be hypnotized if I had a barcode on a wrist Do you do any favors like is there anything of someone exposing a hypnotist? There's got to be something of that. There's got to be. Well amazing Randy, right? Probably must have done it. Um, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:43:13 I don't remember exposing a hypnotist. I remember getting like, mentalist, mentalist, mentalist. Not a fucking shit. Mentalist, god fuck it. But John Edwards immediately got cruelled. Yeah, they're all fucked. Those people, but I'm saying like, John John Edwards is like your father is not proud of you And they're like we talking about John Edwards. He's like I lied about all that the funny
Starting point is 00:43:29 I mean the most fucked up the funniest one was when Sylvia Brown told the The parents of the Cleveland girls that were kidnapped. Mm-hmm. They're like stop looking. I'm getting She's dead in water somewhere. They're like she's drowned somewhere and they're like oh my god And then years later she escapes like the place. And it's like, oh, maybe the drinking water that does. I thought you said her name was Jeanette. Jeanette. Oh, that was, no, Jeanette drowned.
Starting point is 00:43:57 She's dead. You're done, I was alive. Yeah, fuck, I wouldn't own that. I told, I by the way, I told Jeanette's parents that she was alive. Do you want your refund? I already spent the money. Hey guys, can we have people call in
Starting point is 00:44:06 if they were actually ever hypnotized? Like, if it really works? Yes. Yeah, call in. So if you're a liar, give a call in. Yeah, yeah. If you're still hypnotized. 866-969-1969.
Starting point is 00:44:18 We have to be very spooky back drop. 866-969-1969. If you've ever been hypnotized, and it's worth it. Were you initially under the assumption eight six six nine six nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine Yeah, it wasn't there's no way it was I thought maybe it could how can you know she had nice cans? Zoom zoom hypnosis the second I find out it zoom amount I'm out. Yeah, I'm over here. I gotta be honest with you lady hypnotist. I'm out. Yeah, dude It's not a job that It's not a thing I'm gonna trick the penis no, and I'm not the anti woman
Starting point is 00:45:03 But just like I don't know man I just can't figure out how to control someone else's I throw trucker fire fire fire asking crab fisherman fucking hip to test some They're just dude jobs. That's so funny. He goes you want to be a hypnotist? Can you lift that weight? Don't believe those things crossover dude. I hope a bunch of people in the hypnotism at all Why would a woman even need to hypnotize somebody? It's crazy. Use your charm and you're a user of a vagina. Just honey pot. What are you doing? Yeah, I think no one's ever you bought a pocket watch lady you fucking loser. Yeah, you're you're you're you're built to gaslight. You're not even fat. What are you doing? Huh? Nobody's ever plucked like a chicken and
Starting point is 00:45:40 not remembered it and oh and done that. Yeah, uh, two shots. I believe my argument would be that it's never, ever happened. When I was in Tucson, I opened for one of those comedy hip-knit hits when I started. It was like a four-time in the afternoon show. It was bombed. The amazing thing. Yeah, it was when it drank in the back of the room
Starting point is 00:45:57 in the afternoon. I was like, I gotta watch this and you're right. Every person that got hypnotized, they were like, one, I opened looking at their table of friends, being like, whoa, yeah. Yeah, in there. Yeah, one I open looking at their table of friends, being like, oh yeah. Yeah, because they're the person who dragged their friends to a fucking comedy hypnotism show at 4 p.m. You're gonna have them with some mate,
Starting point is 00:46:12 when I clap the three, you're gonna have them with some amazing orgasm of your life, you're gonna have that. I saw one of those. Of course. I did a back when I played music, we played a renfair and the mate we opened for a sex hypnotist.
Starting point is 00:46:24 Yes. And bring up sex hypnotist. for a sex hypnotist. Yes, and bring up sex barbage. He just like made ladies fake war guys on the stage, but then he came to our room after and did like a private show and I'm like hypnotic because he wouldn't do guys. I'm like, make me come bro. Make me fucking cover my pants. And I work like that kid. He goes, I'm not really comfortable with guys. I'm not gay. I'm like it's hypnotism You're not touching me. Yeah, you just have to do that an hour here like you just has to suck your dick
Starting point is 00:46:49 He goes everyone shut your eyes I was you are my deep spilt come on kid come Come on What is this it's hypnotist puppet sexual threats? This is a this is a porn. This is a bit or something. Yeah It looks like one of the duck dynasty guys. You can tell by this. It's not yeah. This is like a clip for sale At clips for sale. Yeah, yeah, he had like an audience of ladies But my friend went up and he like was on the day. I was but they didn't call him up
Starting point is 00:47:22 And we're like what's it like he's like, I don don't know. I guess I kind of felt like I was dreaming, but like, no, it wasn't sexual. It's not even the, it's all completely. I would hypnotize people to say nice things to me. They would say it and they go, I really enjoy your company. There you go. This feels good.
Starting point is 00:47:40 It really is for me. You know, like a black and white pin wheel. Just making friends is hypnotized Yeah, I got you want to hang out some time you get lunch and they go I would love that I go Oh, it's got to do any orgasm yeah, if you look like a rata hypnotist, but then like live show Because they'll do it'll have like 10 ladies on stage. No, I want an ironic our next live show for bond I want to watch this this guy looks No, I want an erotic our next live show for bond. I want to watch this this guy looks so fun
Starting point is 00:48:11 Christine can we get you erotically hypnotized a skankfest Vegas there's probably dude this is the rocket into throwing You looking for and erotic hypnotist. How about a chorus of it? We're gonna fucking drum the line of these guys. We got Danny Shelton. We got more easy on skydiving. Yeah A lot of just initial endings. Yeah. Oh, we got Paul. Yeah This sensational Raul Oh my god, I want to watch some of these fucking sex. Let's take a break.
Starting point is 00:48:47 We got a break. All right. Chris and Zach hanging out for the full show. They're going to be in Rochester, New York, at Comedy at the Carlson. This Saturday, August 27th. Be sure to check out High Society Radio and Zach's midnight spook show, both on guest digital, both awesome shows.
Starting point is 00:49:01 I had a burp. Big J going to be at the improv in Tampa Friday Saturday, after that both awesome shows. I had a burp. Here you go. Big J gonna be at the improv in Tampa Friday, Saturday, after that McGubbies. Columbus Funnybone, this motherfucker's everywhere. BigJacomedy.com, go get tickets and find out all tour dates. Go and global. Dan's gonna be in Tulso, Oklahoma this Saturday, everybody, with Adrian Apollucci.
Starting point is 00:49:23 Then he's gonna be at DC Improv, triumphant, healthy returns, September 8th to the 10th after that is going to be in Addison, Texas Cleveland Ohio for tickets and all tour dates go to dansover.com this is the bonfire you've been listening to Sirius XM's bonfire! New episodes every Tuesday through Friday mornings and full shows always on SiriusXM!

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