The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Jacob the Figure Skater
Episode Date: September 3, 2021On this episode of The Bonfire Jacob becomes a figure skater and we find out DJ Lou was beat by a woman in basketball!Stream "The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson & Dan Soder" for 3 months free on the Si...ruisXM app! Offer Details Apply: www.SiriusXM.com/Bonfire Follow us on all social media @TheBonfireXM @DanSoder www.DanSoder.com @BigJayOakerson www.BigJayComedy.com #CrackleCrackle
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I'm Dan Soder and I'm Big J. Ocarson and welcome to the Bonfire podcast.
You can hear our full show every day on SiriusXM.
Go to SiriusXM.com slash Bonfire for a special offer.
And now the Bonfire with Big J. Ocarson and Dan Soder.
We're back.
We should do a whole show of covers of us doing covers.
Well not me I can't say not then you can't it, dude
No, I literally cannot sing it's quite alright
It's like when Dylan from gas digital when I went to go do a podcast there. He was like
Yo, man, you can't play with Jay and I would play basketball on Tuesday. So it's like yeah, it's like a basketball
He's like no, you don't Dylan. He's like oh, yeah. But he's so young and full of energy that he was like,
nah man, you don't suck.
I bet you're great.
I'm like, Dylan, that doesn't work.
I'm 38, I suck.
It's in.
The results are in.
Who also be the first one to complain that you suck?
Yeah, and then I would fight him.
And then I would just get mad.
I don't, because I would be like, dude,
I said I suck at this.
And he's like, yo, dog, but I didn't know he was like,
that bad at it, dog.
Yeah, he's a, he's a Jewish wigger, a jigger, if you will.
Yeah, he's really a, but yeah, he's a, yeah,
he goes on the road with Derek and,
which McCall at time, sweet kid, I like Dylan.
Yeah, Dylan's a sweetheart.
He's just all kinds of bigger.
But he was, he's also young, so he's got that young like,
energy.
Yo, the world is mine.
I'm about to dominate.
And when someone in their late 30s is like,
hey, I actually can't do that.
I remember, I remember like in comedy
where I first started someone being like,
well, I can't eat that late.
They said that to me and I was like, yeah, you can.
What are you talking about?
You can't eat it one in the morning. the guys like do them 48 not gonna eat it one in the morning
And I was like oh you can't do that now. Yeah
As you get old now. I can't do a I can't do hot sauce on a night before I travel of any kind
That's so crazy. It's so crazy though
But it's fine at all. It's so crazy to be like a night before I travel. I'm not allowed to have spicy. It's
That's getting old, dude. That's what just creates an issue. Yeah, I'm gonna have to ship before I go to the airport and then
Definitely have to on the airplane and I won't well this is gonna be on talking about today
This is kind of what we were talking about with sleeping on couches is like there's young people shit that you don't realize you're gonna miss like
Playing basketball and not being sore. Yeah
Yeah, I played basketball till I felt I had COVID
They're like I have to lay down my body's overheating. Yeah, I can't smell or taste anything. I played so hard
Oh, God, I bald out so hard that I'm pretty sure I just released the virus to
everybody else. I know you like to move your body. You really do. Really do, though.
You really do. Yeah, man, sleep on a couch. What young person thing would you take
back if you could? If you could get one one per I think eating late at night.
And I can do again. What would have that if I could have one you could get one one per, I think eating late at night and not having a hard time. I can do it again.
What would have that, if I could have one thing back?
Yeah.
Oh, energy, just the endless energy of like I said,
playing basketball in the afternoon for four hours,
five hours when I was a teenager.
And then when you were like, all right,
let's go home and get showered up and go out
and do something or whatever, you weren't, when I got got home from that I was never kind of like Jesus Christ, man
Do I still want to go out? It didn't even think of it. You're just like all right time to go shower and go now
If I'm playing basketball at a seven o'clock at night, you're like you want to go to dinner at nine?
Like dude the day's done man. It's oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, there's like I'm gonna take a shower luckily and then like
Be I think I would take my metabolism. That's what I would want back
I'm a tablet never had a metabolism
Well, I was gonna bring up height either, but now I feel bad bringing both of those things
It's real nice dude. I would take my youthful height
Realized dude, I would take my youthful height. I would take the growing spirit where I just burst it through all the expectations
What I would take back is my lack of
thought or any
consumption of space in my brain over
The fears of tomorrow
That's what I would get back. Do you know what you mean? You didn't have fears from all of them? I mean, like if I had a fucking weird thing
that was like, my vision was fucking blurry
from something, so I'm just wrong.
I was like, so I'm just wrong, my eye.
I'll sleep it off, or I'll play through it.
It doesn't go away, I'll go check.
Now I'm like, my vision was a little bit blurry.
I'm like, well, that's definitely retinal cancer.
Is that even a thing?
It's what I had.
Welcome to my life.
My whole entire time. I've always been like that.
Oh, do you know what I was a little? I never even know about it at all.
When I was little, if I like woke up and something heard on me, I'd be like, this is
probably cancer. No, I just Isabella swore she had cancer and she went to the
doctor and it was a pimple. Jesus. She had, I was like, oh, you have the J-Jane.
Well, it might have been cancer, but they squeezed it out.
You can squeeze it in the trash.
Yeah, now she's talking about therapy, Christine.
Yeah, definitely.
Yeah, I don't know if you know it.
I guess you don't know a lot about oncology, surprise, surprise.
J's done some slight dabbling at oncology.
I've done some dabbling, her.
I have a loose, into a loose interest in oncology.
Dude, that's one of honestly, personally,
that's one of the most used fell dog drops in my brain.
Is the passing interest in numerology.
It comes with a lot.
I got all excited.
I got excited in a apartment number
because it had seven thirteen in it
It totaled thirteen and then I was like, oh no, I'm like Feldman. Oh, no
I'm busy. It's passing. Well, two to two. There's not a time on a clock when I see it's two-two
Two that I don't think of. Corey if I mean he's infected my brain. Yeah, he absolutely two-two has
And into the campers. It means, you know,
you know, you know, a lot of football. People take pictures of there when their gas comes up
to 2 22 or 22 dollars and 20 cents. Like they everyone's like, Oh, look, look, look. Uh, Jacob,
do what was what would be the one young thing you would take back if you could. He still has it all.
thing you would take back if you could. He still has it all.
Be a good old.
Well, this is my neck.
I would like my useful neck because so you're born pretty active and yeah, I get very aggravated.
Cause I still have the desire to do things in the,
and the stamina, but I, I'm not allowed to do things.
So you want your young bones to send those rice cakes, yeah, for bones now.
I hear you. Yeah. I hear. Listen, I don't want to jump on the, I don't want to make you
feel worse. I'm just saying maybe you should drink some more milk.
If ever, there was a commercial. Am I right? That leads to something I was going to bring up. You know, I took up skating.
And I'm really enjoying roller skating. No, ice skating. Oh, really? I love it. Florida?
You've taken it up. World, there's like world class. It's so big down here. People want to get out of the
out of the heat.
Yeah, me since there's this one facility that is just the training level there is insane,
like the hockey players and the figure skaters are super talented.
So I went to see my niece and nephew.
We're here for a couple of weeks and they were enrolled.
They're really young.
So I thought, well, that looks cool.
So, yeah, I took it up.
But, yeah.
Dude, I would love to see Jacob do a power stop on ice skates
or he goes, oh, welcome to the ring, pussy.
Here's how we play.
Oh, just pop.
Yeah, fan it out.
And I want you to do like a cartoon where when you do it,
it makes DJ Lou like a snowman. I want to, want to do it. It just covers them in snow and then his eyes blink and then it all falls off
I'm bleak bleak. Yeah, yeah, I want to see Jacob back skate. You know where they wiggle their butt
Yeah, you know they go side to side. I want to see you go down with one and like what's that called the pistol when you bend
the knee and put the other leg out straight guys
I would say as a group we should all get into roller skating and then we could
do those dances where we clap and go around and lift our leg up as we skate around.
If I went 13 feet on roller skates without falling, it would be, you'd see me celebrate
like I just wanted to calf a lot.
Jay, but I don't know how to get on things where my feet are out of control.
But you can learn now.
You can still learn that we can get
Your back. I got good balance. Oh, dude
Ask them all makes me feel like I just got hit by a trash truck
Why don't I go take some spills on the concrete? Well, I don't know. Get your head out of your ass, would you?
I do I want to get our our my head out of my ass and onto that podium
Competition is there a couch potato league for a figure for male male figure skating?
Because I'll do it with dad.
Not for a skating.
I'm not roller skating.
Oh, right.
Well, either way.
Yeah.
I'm telling you, with the right moment, I'm dude, I can get you up in the air.
We could do some team stuff.
Oh, yeah, dude.
I'll be the fly.
I'll be the fucking.
You be the thunder.
I'll be the lightning.
You just lift me up.
I'll fucking go to work up there, man.
When I got you
up in the air. Oh, you was one hand. Yeah, I did all this work on my core strength and bending.
I'm gonna look at you and you're gonna go. I'm flying. I'm flying. Jay, we're doing it.
Jacob, do you like, are you loving ice skating? I really like it. Plus the,
every all the kids are at school. So when I go, I have an entire rank to myself
for four hours if I want.
Oh, you go for the,
you go for the,
you go for the sex offender hours?
Yeah.
You go, guys, we gotta clear it out.
So, we've guys got records, open skate.
Doesn't that kinda announce it?
Just because you like kids, doesn't mean you can't,
you can't ice skate, you know what I mean?
You just gotta come for the registered sex offender hour. All right, everybody, doesn't mean you can't, you can't ice skate, you know what I mean? You just gotta come for the registered sex fender hour.
All right, everybody, don't forget right now
is open skate for all sex offenders,
all sex offenders you're allowed on the rink.
Yeah, Chuck E. Cheese is like that from 6am to 8am.
You can't tell them they can't,
they like the pizza, they like the pizza, you know.
They wanna play video games,
they should be willing to.
Anybody that's ever played ski ball knows,
you gotta stay sharp.
So you gotta show up every day and play it
Absolutely for me. It's very meditative. I like it, but one here's the thing. I didn't because of my neck
There's two skates you either go by figure skates or hockey skates. They're two different
types of skating yeah to quote to get a little bit of a
little bit of a
little bit of a
little bit of a
little bit of a
little bit of a
little bit of a
little bit of a
little bit of a
little bit of a
little bit of a
little bit of a
little bit of a
little bit of a
little bit of a
little bit of a
little bit of a
little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a Yeah, but it's good cutting edge was the the serious DB Sweeney DB queen and Moira Kelly. Yeah, dude. This is my one thing. I'm good at
Hey, you well no music to get a lot of stuff, dude, but you were saying you ice skates or hockey skates?
When I she at like I take lessons and she said, well, are you playing hockey and because of my my neck?
I wanted to play really bad. She said I said no. So she
she will get the figure skates. You're just they're better for you then.
You're gonna be doing Jay. Nobody you cannot look masculine on figure skates. Oh no. And I'm so aggravated now. Oh no. You're
Nancy Caraghan. You're Nancy Caraghan calves. Why? Why? Why?
Oh, now I got to buy hockey skates. Just damn.
Because I can't take the, I can't take the
how I just
Jacob to fix it. All you have to do.
I can't play hockey.
Jacob, all to fix it. All you have to do is just do an Eastern European accent when you get on the ring and I'm like
You know this guy was in Lily Hammer. He bronze the Lily Hammer
Hello, my name is Jacob. I'm here just for escape up for my I like to do it for my car to the old vascular
You don't need I was enjoying it. You're not going to be to tap around.
Yeah, get some hockey skates.
I said, it's skate skates, dude.
Go follow Paul Alono.
I want you to get touch with the ice when you go around the corner.
Just holding his hand down.
How many eyes you want?
And now I have the, I put no thought into it at the time because it was just all
new to me and figured, all right safer for my neck
But now I can't take it so now I have to get the hockey skates. So you were out there and like oh my god
Is that oxonabal? Oh?
Oh wow check it check brine boy tunnel
Is that something hammer Is that Dorothy Hamill?
Oh, yeah.
Who are you saying?
Jacob, you don't think what dudes, you don't care what dudes do.
I don't care what dudes think of me, but when women think of, but don't look at me like
with the figure skates on, then it drives me mad.
Jacob's coming out.
I think.
Because it dudes are the ones looking over.
Like, hey, who's a fucking ton you hearting out there?
Yeah.
Look at this guy. I'm excited to watch you do your fucking ice routine.
It would be funny if you were just paused in the middle of the rink when it's empty,
and then they start playing music.
I-
Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, you know.
You know that pause before they start?
I play-
I play-
Uh, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, and all that jazz. That, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that that that that that that and all that jazz
Here's Jacob a Todd who just started recently
Just wanted to skate and peace, but then I did play it up
Like she's teaching me how to skate on one leg now and move on just won't turn on one leg so I did do this
like I balanced like a pirouette.
A pirouette just just sexy because I was so aggravated.
That's sexy.
I just went into it.
I hope you're wearing blue.
I hope you're wearing bloomers under your skirt because everyone's going to see it.
Tussy.
When he said he's going to get me a plunging neckline.
He said he's gonna get me a plunging neckline
Well, it's gonna be a plunging neckline, but it's gonna be some some netting here though You just gonna make you look a little bit tan or was it a small key?
I can't wait to see the the the glitter lightning bolt across your chest that just shows a mesh chest
Yeah, but then the takeoff of Jacob would be the coolest if he just went
Yeah, but then the takeoff of Jacob would be the coolest if he just went
Me and Dan split the cost can we design you a figure skating alpha Jacob honestly Jacob I didn't know is the destiny I was supposed to have. Oh, that might be it. That might be the one right there
That's got ruffles on it dude. How are we not doing? Oh my god?
Why is that actually a men's they want your fucking nut hair hanging out like that? Yeah
We're looking at it. Well, they wear pants
That's just the top you gotta put on I don't want you in pants though. It says men's no
No, it's not it is, but you got to understand then you put on pants too. No Jacob. Oh you would just that
Yeah, I want you in a unit hard. There he is.
There's my guy.
Yeah.
That's got everything we're asking for.
See through mesh.
I'm pretty sure my mom had that sweater in the 90s.
Did snap on her pus like that.
Joining the probably push a did up.
I mean, there's no way.
Jacob, don't, Jacob, please.
Don't want me to, Jacob, I took my shirt off and did a-
This is how I'm crazed I am about it.
Like now I want to do something very irresponsible for my neck,
like make up for it by joining a older dude's hockey league.
No, no, no, I want you to try figure skating.
I get very competitive.
Actually, will you join a hockey league and wear an outfit?
No, I'm not putting on any of this.
Can you show up like that, Jacob, please?
Oh, please, with the, please, our first day back in studio.
I've done a lot for this show.
I'm white both.
I, I just need, I just did, I just gave me a
boxed idol underwear.
I'm not, I've done my bit.
Yeah.
Damn.
All right.
I mean, I just remember I was shirtless under water doing what I hate the most the other week for everyone's enjoyment
But don't I don't have emotionally
I've a motion on myself so
Supposed to expose himself, but that's fine. No, I wear a giant mouse head, but that's cool
Maybe we're the big mouth
You you look badass with that. I can't believe that's gone. I put my heart and soul into that
you look bad-ass with that. I can't believe that's gone. I put my heart and soul into that.
It's not going on now. It's going forever. It's not a camper on Jacob. You can do all these things. Dude, you're like the next user. Oh, Hanoi. Yeah, man, but I'm playing hockey. That's it. You could be a
Victor. You're a hurt dog. Um, Jacob, these outfits would be great. And honestly, I'd say where these outfits to hockey.
Jacob. Jacob. Jacob.
Enjoy it. We're the feathers. Oh, Jacob, you're like little Phoenix.
A lot of people are saying you can be the next go back for scene. a
a
a
a I'm just talking to you. DJ Lil while we're talking about this, if you can get one bit of thing back from your childhood, my guess was going to be hairs at what your answer would be.
Oh, yeah, I forgot about fucking hair.
I always dream like it.
I always dream like I still have hair.
Really?
All fucking sad, yeah.
You wait until you have a full head of hair?
Yes.
With a nightmare.
It's like a phantom limb.
Right.
But my answer would be my beautiful pink lungs.
I wish I had them back.
Oh, just being able to believe comfortably.
I mean, quit smoking.
Seven years.
You're good.
That's not true.
Christine, I smoked weed and I quit smoking nine years ago and I still, yeah, you do smoke
weed every day.
Yeah.
Every day.
Yeah, pink long. It's every weird every day. Yeah, every day.
Yeah, pink long day, bro. It's every day, bro. It's every day, bro.
But DJ Lou, just imagine the song my favorite boxer.
But just imagine running down the street and then not wanting to die.
I got beat by my ex girlfriend in horse and I'm like Jesus Christ if I could
break I would have fucking killed her. Yeah. Why do you need breath for horse? Well I was
just coughing so much that the fucking game was moot. But do it. It's a game. You don't
have to run. Yeah, I do. I do. Easy as basketball game to play. Here's the problem. Here's
the problem. It's a brand new net. So the ball gets stuck every time you make a shot. Right. So she kept hitting her shot. So I got to
jump up and get the ball out and tapping get it out of the net. So you do that 20 times
and you can't breathe. I can't even breathe talking to you right now. You shouldn't be
winded doing that. That's crazy. That's crazy. I see argue on lose side because you're doing
basically 20 jump ups trying to get this ball out of the net that that's that's more physically demanding than you think
Yeah, and run running after the ball
I'm playing games of basketball. I have that's that's that's too bad. Jay you're QB1, all right
Better athlete than me. I'm not playing you in horse anymore
We've never played one ever
I'm not playing you in the horse anymore. We've never played one ever.
Two, I don't know why you would say you want...
Hey Lou, play me in horse. I'll grab the ball after someone enters.
Do you know what if you guys play in my head later?
R, Jay's like, it's fucking bullshit, I'm gassed.
That's pretty wild. I mean, you guys zipped playing horse.
That's nuts.
The ball was lopsided, I played the ball.
It's like saying,
out riding an elevator tired you out.
And guys,
then you go up and down all day.
What do you guys want for me?
I got the bad.
Two story walk up and I'm
winded sometimes coming on the show.
I'll tell you what though,
a little impressed.
You were able to get up there and slap that ball out of the net.
Though not everybody can do that.
Yeah, do that.
Some ups. I didn't think you had the
ups for that. I got a two inch vertical.
Pretty nice. Your ex girl beat you in horse. That was probably the beginning of the end,
my guess. She's like, I can't, I can't lay with this man. I mean, that's rough.
That was the first. If Christine, if Christine was beating me in horse, I would find a way
to accidentally ping the ball off her face. I'm not sure if I'm going to
get a chance to play with you.
I'm not sure if I'm going to
get a chance to play with you.
I'm not sure if I'm going to
get a chance to play with you.
I'm not sure if I'm going to
get a chance to play with you.
I'm not sure if I'm going to
get a chance to play with you.
I'm not sure if I'm going to
get a chance to play with you.
I'm not sure if I'm going to
get a chance to play with you.
I'm not sure if I'm going to
get a chance to play with you.
I'm not sure if I'm going to
get a chance to play with you.
I'm not sure if I'm going to
get a chance to play with you.
I'm not sure if I'm going to get a chance to play with you. I'm not sure if I'm going to get a chance to play with you. I'm not sure if I'm going to get a in horse. Dude twice. Whoa, no.
Do you remember what the score was?
Horse to HOR, and then horse to HORS was closer.
My, I think the funniest thing in this situation
would be to me for me to hire a shooting coach
and have private lessons with Christine unbeknownst to anybody. And then
in months, just be like Christine challenged Jato a game of horse and watch Christine
just step courier. He's just putting down threes. That would be fucking great.
First of all, I'm showered and I have to fly out in the morning and I will say with no
fear and no fear of sweating or exerting myself. I will go film a game of me and Christine playing horse tonight
Sure, that's now that's before I hire
Ray Allen to teach you the perfect form. This is almost a proof you should not lose to your girlfriend by any letters. It should be horse to nothing
Unless your girl played basketball somewhere. J, if I could, as someone that served in Guy Court and was on Guy Code for many years,
you're actually bringing up a famous law of mine, which is it is breaking Guy Code to lose
horse to your girlfriend. And then to say it's because you were exhausted from the game is even
more so the thing. We got a case here if we want to take him to guy court and I haven't prosecuted in years but I mean I'm pretty sure I can get back into it Christine we play me
in horse tonight yeah Christine listen to me do all of your shots from in between your legs granny
shoot all of them because you'll make some of them you think so yeah I do still kind of want to rest. I might be my big Miami weekend. Oh, yeah, I forgot you got to go do it.
Christine, you're, you're talking like DJ Lou now. A game of horse is resting. If you were on a bedrest for a high-risk pregnancy,
you could go play horse.
That's the question I asked the doctor.
He's like, I want you to get plenty of bedrest.
You go, we heard requests,
what about playing horse with my girlfriend?
Because that's actually encouraged.
That's actually a good way.
It's the opposite of exercise.
It's killing time.
It's like playing solitaire on your phone. It's the opposite of exercise. It's killing time. It's like playing solitaire
on your phone. It does, it's nothing. It's crazy. You were at a breath and got your ass kicked.
He smokes like, do you smoke more than a pack a day? I'm right around there. Packed in a half.
I'd say killer. I really, I don't know when to start my game. You know, I know. I know. When did you start saying?
You know, you could smoke while you play horse.
Yeah, that's actually probably the best basketball game for smoking.
It's the, oh, it's, yes.
I can't jump up.
I get the ball out of the hoop with a cigarette in my mouth.
I think, yeah, you could. Take it
out with one hold it in one hand and then jump and slap the ball with the other hand.
Well, I've been playing a lot more lately, so I'm getting better by myself. So we'll see.
Are you now? Are you getting good enough to almost be able to beat a girl?
Yes. That's why he's been listening.
But that makes sense why he's been listening to so much vision quest soundtrack.
He's been getting ready for the limit.
He's going to take a limit.
If you get one black blue product, when black blue brought up that song, he's like,
what do you think it?
Lou had to stop himself from going from beating your bitch ex-golfing and horse once you get
good at it.
Where's your basketball, Lewis?
Spend it on your finger.
Oh, yeah.
Lou looks like one of the kids of the Washington generals.
You know, you're the...
You're like a plush fond of lost 100 straight games
to the globe, Trotter.
You're like the, you're like the and one guy.
Lou, what happened?
You were on the handbooks.
And you read that smoking book. Lou looks like the and. Lou looks like the and one guy. Lou, what happened? You were on hand and you read that smoking book.
Lou looks like the end. Lou looks like the end one guy. He's bald, completely gray.
Yeah. He looks like Elmer, Fudden, Space Jam. Spin it on your finger, dude. It's nice ball.
Trying to, I'm trying to palm it like a man Can't do it
Damn my ball. I want to get my ball to spit it and palm it
So bad now you just want to do a highlight video of you just be like what's it give you a little give you a little vamp dad
Hey anyways, we're gonna see J's basketball styleings
Lou you're joking about losing tear girlfriend and horse right it's clear. I lostings. Lou, you're joking about losing to your girlfriend in horse, right?
It's clear.
I lost twice.
No, I mean, I don't know what I'm going to do.
I don't know what I'm going to do.
I think that just changes.
Is Jain Christine going to go play now?
Maybe it's a lady for no play, then come back.
Dude, I honestly think, hey guys, Jain, Christina, both gone.
I really think I could hire a guy to teach Christine to shoot. Anyways, that
was my story of the time that Kenbae Muttumbo saved my entire seventh grade class.
Really?
Yeah, I was pretty much sorry. Let's just say Muttumbo is one hell of a getaway driver.
My balls rubber. You're rubber. I'm glue. Whatever you say bounces off you and sticks to me,
that's not how it goes. I'm glue whatever you say bounces off you and sticks to me. It's not how it goes
I'm gonna kill myself
Damn jay is really good at that look at that spinning the ball on his finger
Damn, oh, it's a weird thing
You wearing a headband I can see
What did I you should wear a headband like me?
now
I don't wear headbands dude, but what if you find out that's your look dude headbands? You should wear a headband like me. No.
I don't wear headbands, dude.
But what if you find out that's your look, dude?
Headbands?
That's a DJ Lewis thing, for sure.
All day long.
Palm, palm ball.
Can I make an offer to DJ, Lou?
Please.
I'd like to hear it.
Lou, you need to build your endurance up.
Why don't you, I do that.
I've done an online training with Jane, Christine and Lewis.
Why don't you do that with me, resistance band training?
Oh my God.
We did that like twice and then never again.
What happened to that?
That's not true.
I always.
That is true.
I did it much more than twice.
I did it on the road a bunch.
I did a lot. I didn't know I got that got that right that purple band and bring it. Yeah, I did it so much
I just did it right now. I didn't I didn't like twice
Well, the offer's out there
Yeah, man, I think I would do that
It's time to turn it all around now. It's like a nine-minute workout
So maybe I'd say start with two minutes of it because
if that horse's game of horse is gonna get you this might just kill you.
Damn!
Banking every shot she banked every fucking shot.
It's still what then why you just take shots out of a range.
Yeah, don't.
The bank wasn't open for me.
Just posted the bank, supposed to the basket.
That's what I was trying to do. Oh, man. Is this what
well hated her? She humiliated you? Is that why cause now I
understand that he's sticking up for his retarded brother.
He goes, listen, bro, I get it and I'm sorry. Oh, it makes you
feel real good to make my brother like a retard out there. You
know he's uncorordinated. Yeah.
He gets winded.
He's got soft lungs.
He's always had baby lungs.
You know he gets winded at standing around games.
I can't play billions with him because there are
collapse of exhaustion.
You shouldn't get tired of any game you can play
in a parking space.
Yeah, dude.
Damn. I got a little bowling, I guess. Yeah, dude. Damn.
I got a little bowling, I guess.
I'm worried about it.
A bowling is more than horse.
It is.
There's no jumping.
You don't have to jump much in horse.
You do when she keeps hitting the shots
and I got to go rescuing her ball.
This reason is not me.
I really want to be more man. The reason doesn't make you say any more masculine, Lou.
You're like, well, she kept hitting these fantastic shots.
So I had to go retrieve the ball.
Did it really would be really fun if you found out that she was just nice.
Because she was just fucking nailed all the shots.
She doing the drip work goes back between her legs, couple of times.
That's what I'm working on now.
I'm trying to get the back and forth under the legs. Like, go low on it.
I'm not good at that one.
My left hand really is that of just a complete,
like polio victim.
It's worthless.
Can you do a layup with your left hand?
It looks silly and sometimes,
and it misses more than it'll go in, I think,
to softer too much.
But, I'm not gonna put the English on it, buddy. I use my right when I go left.
Do you feel like you feel like if the gun in the butt game goes
down again? Yeah, that's a win. 19 to one. No, no, I wouldn't
win 19 to one. That was a bad thing from the start.
But one on one, I'd beat Lewis for sure.
But also one on one, just fucking sucks. It really does as a game.
Talk about something to gass as you have to three points
because you're everything.
You're shot, rebound, defense, everything,
every play, that sucks.
Yeah.
Yeah, I am.
So to bad tell, I I said, I'm for certainly
probably a leagues better basketball player than Lewis. However, he is a leagues more in shape
worse than me as far as like cardio and everything. He's also training for that Ellis fight.
You know, you got to wait till he's not trained. But even what he's doing not anyways, not
training, he's just going to have this is a guy who does like multiple mile runs. Like,
yeah, he's able to get get to that point. I'm nowhere near anything like that
So like he will just like gas me up
I think I can beat him on the skill of basketball one-on-one still pretty
Pretty easily, but I'll be zipped
Yeah, but like he's like I said, he'll he's far more
Right now, I mean probably most of his life, but right now he's like much more in better shape tonight.
What is that fight about? He looks great. He looks great fighting. I mean, it's not, they don't know
officially, I think. Don't cause a COVID? Yeah, but like, we'll see, I'm excited for that.
It looks great, man. Is training and stuff? Yeah, I mean, that fight we've been waiting for
for two years. It's all I'm excited to see. Fighting Jason Ellis, yeah. Yeah. Oh,
yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. He's fighting everybody in this time slot.
He's next to me. Next is going to be the ultimate fight him and Jay. What's the bug?
He inverses me. And then for you know, it'll be him versus Nikki Glazer when she starts
coming back to radio. Yeah, she's like, I'm back and I'm fighting Lewis.
And then what is she just chaos him?
We've had it all of our sponsors just they ask about her first and go,
she's not doing radio anymore.
They go, oh, yeah, then I guess those guys, I guess it's fine.
Then that's fine.
Probably like Jacob sells us.
Think of these guys as like two male Nikki Glazers.
If Nikki Glazer was split into two dudes,
this is not quite, but not quite as funny.
This is those guys.
I'm telling ya, these are the guys.
These are the dudes.
These are your dudes.
These are your dudes.
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