The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Life Swap

Episode Date: September 6, 2023

Bob and Jay make a silly NFL bet that may result in swapping lives for a year!

I'm Bobby Kelly and it's Big J. Ocarson. We're actually a full radio show on Series XM, not just a podcast. For full episodes of the Bonfire, you can listen on the Series XM app. Go to seriesexm.com slash Bonfire for a special offer. And now the Bonfire with Big J. Ocarson and Robert Kelly. 6-2-8 is to the right and if you follow their make, we are too far apart. Yeah. Make me hot. Oh, make me hot.

That's hot right there. I agree with you, Bali. Rotten piss to this guy. Remember when this guy as a smash-mouthed guy, you went rotten piss. Now I really didn't hit me at all emotionally. Hey, you know what her hit me? Age. His age he died, but he was an alcoholic problem.

I thought like fucking Chris Cornell died again. No, no, no, that guy just loved jerking off to the extreme, to the Maximus. Jerking off to the Max. He was killed by the Clintons. He was allegedly killed by the Clintons. Allegedly. And it's a faction is we're on air Christine. She does it again. She does it again. Oh, that was the best dude. Does before you're here Bobby Christine walked in didn't know we were on the air. And the background of the show there was a go low and you hear Christine go I love snacks.

I love snacks. I do. I love snacks too. I'm a big snacking. It was so embarrassing, is there a boyfriend? Nothing makes me, part of the reason I took this gig, I love you, I love the show. But when I was kind of coming in subbing for a little bit, and you dropped those snacks on the middle of the table,

that made me really sealed the deal. I'll tell you what, snacks at work were a big fuel for any job I ever had. Any job I had where there was a free snacks at work, I would always come and be like, that was not our job, it was fine. I worked at a tiny restaurant, a lot of FMEO Joe Joe's in the North End of Boston,

the fact that I got to eat every day for free, no family meal, whatever you wanted. What? Yeah, that's different. Oh, I used to eat every day for free. No family meal, whatever you want it. What? Yeah. That's different. Oh, I used to get the bread and oil, and then put cheese in the oil and salt and pepper. Oh, my phone, cool.

Dip the bread and the oil with the cheese. I like a little, that oil's gotta be super flavored for me to just use the oil before I throw a little balsamic in that bad boy. Little bit, but like a real balsamic. Like a creamy, like a serabie balsamic. Yeah. Oh, it sounds so good right now.

We just ate, though. Christine took me away. I had a, was infilly with the chance to have a cheese steak this weekend. Christine brought me to, she wanted Wawa Tuna. So we got that instead. What the f-? Oh.

Wawa tuna is great. Look at Wawa tuna meatballs. I like the Wawa turkey with the gravy. The gobbler? Yeah. I've never had a gobbler in my life. Huh? We have to try it.

Really good. I can't be that good. It's all right. I mean, if it was going to be good, Wawa would be the ones to figure it out for sure. Yeah. But isn't that good? I told you. Stuff in cranberry sauce gravy.

Lady, late night at Wawa, stopped me when I was leaving. She's like, sir, I was like, what? She goes, are you all right? I was like, yeah, she goes, you have $40 worth of meat. And it's like, 2.30 in the morning. She had, the worker asked you that. Yeah in the morning. She had the worker issue that.

Yeah, I was like, yeah, she goes, you probably, you know, that's a lot of food. I've never had someone show concern. She goes, I had a double bypass recently and you probably, you know, you should need all that. I was like, no, it's over the next three days. 100% not. I was just, wait a minute, this party.

I went back and just got naked down to my tidy whiteies and a tube socks, put a towel over my belly. Didn't shame you into not eating it. I mean, for a minute, she made me feel, like we had a moment at a wawa in the middle of nowhere. I play those games at myself all the time in a hotel room. I'll get like some peanut M&Ms and I'll empty like half of them in front of me and then put on the bed on the tummy time and I just put them at a reach towards the end of the bed over there the rest. I roll them

up in a way it seems very tight and I eat my 10 M&Ms and then as you sit in there I almost look I'm sneaking to myself like while I'm laughing I reach over and grab it and pull it to myself like I don't have like two more over and grab it and pull it into myself like, I don't know if I'd have like two more of these. I do that with the double tree cookies when you check into the double tree hotel and they give you the chocolate chip cookie at the counter. I've never not been shamed when I go back for more late night. When you ask if there's any around they go, maybe.

I've went to the double tree when I didn't see it there and said, hey, I didn't get my cookies. Do you know they sell a tin of them? And they gave me cookies. They give you a tin of them now. You can buy a tin in the lobby. And I don't want to buy them, I want them free. I want them for now.

It does taste better free. And I like to get more than I need because sometimes late night when you're like, damn, I should've got some snacks tonight. I had dinner like a long time ago and oh my God, the double treat cookies here. It's so good. So good.

But there's no such thing as late night milk at a place. I don't like my cookies without milk. Yeah. You can't really drink water with cookies. Christine would, she couldn't care less about milk with cookies. It doesn't really mean that much to her as it does to me. What do you polish? No, I just don't know.

Christine only cookies with beer juice. You don't give a shit. That's the American Indian air she'll drink from a creek. She likes to drink swill. Christine, that is your style. It's good to be back everybody's on the, we got Jacob. Yes. Florida.

That's right everybody, welcome back to the most miserable crew and show business. No, they're the best. We got DJ Lewis still off cigarettes. Energy is popping. He's back to the right happy D I mean dude you you you you energy's awesome. Yeah, cuz I'm trying not to smoke also Jacobs not here Your mortal enemy. It was a real week while you were gone, dude. I know I kind of felt bad leaving

The last time I was here. It got a little tense on your last live day last live day I thought the show was crumbling I felt bad and then Jay had to explain it to every guest host So then we had to relive it three days in a row. Yeah, sounds that sounds bad. Sounds like you didn't like that It got so intense at one point Did I the I called my mom to break the tension and my mom admitted on the air that she had sex with women before. What? So we got that.

So we got that in the books. Of course you're my head sex with women. I really took one for this. She ran out of everybody in the neighborhood. Yeah. No guys left. She had a fucking EMT. Yeah.

Black, black, little, what's up, buddy? Good to see you. On the Zoom, hi, buddy. You as well, good, sir. Yeah, I'm looking at some loving to be here. Oh, thank you very much. Black Lou, who are the Cowboys losing two week one? The Giants. Nice. Oh, no. Well, that's a pick them for me. Either one of those can go down. That doesn't matter. You don't care, Bobby, about

football. I mean, that's not not I don't have a lady like I'm well. That's weird to say I like football. I'm into football But I don't I'm you know, I'm not you know who they're playing this week. I'm not a step. You know who they're playing first game I don't like being bullied like this. It's a bully. It's pretty good. It's called who are the New England Patriots playing week one of the new season of football Don't look at that. My wife is at phone. Don't look at phone. My wife is calling. No, she's not. And it's an emerging saying.

No, she's not. I will not. I will not be bullied, Jay. This is insane. Don. I tell you what, the answer is going to bum you out so much. They're playing the Miami Dolphins. There you go.

You should have just guessed better. You should have guessed better. Because here's the thing. That would be your team, quote unquote, going against Dan's secondary team now now because he has to like the dolphins because his friends the coach but it's had nothing to do with Dan at all. Dan's Adam I'm I had a slight out of mind. Well you brought him up. The Patriots are going I mean you brought him up. You met I'm tongue I'm breaking down while you made the guests

the dolphins. I made the guests the dolphins because I know here's the thing Jay I am not a stats guy. I love music but I don't know who sings, the dolphins. I made the guests the dolphins because I know. Here's the thing, Jay. I am not a stats guy. I love music, but I don't know who sings have to shit that I like. I don't retain things because I'm dumb. Well, you knew that they're playing the dolphins. But I know, I tell you what, you know what I know how to do. I made a Swedish stove.

What is that? That's a stove. You can cook stuff on in the woods It's got a sweeter stove. Yeah, you get a log cut it into four to quarters and then you shave off some of the inside and then you light it on fire and you can We max cooked Stake tips we cooked probably how did you know they were playing? How did you know they were playing? My amie dolphin because I know man. I'm a man's man, dude. I'm a man's man I'm a man. They you know what they call me around the way man's man Kelly

Well, no, you're not this man's man because if you were this man's man Kelly anybody right now Google it if you were this man's man Yeah, you would know that the New England Patriots Bobby yes first game of the season yeah To start off the new game of the season, yeah. To start off the new era of the bonfire, is the Patriots versus the fucking Philadelphia Eagles. That's what I'm saying, dude. I threw you the other way because the Eagles called. Close to throw the other way.

I didn't, I knew the answer already. Listen man, it doesn't matter. We're gonna win. No. I will bet you everything we win. I'll have it this. How about we do a handshake bet right now. An entire life swap.

How about this? I just suck you off. Look, as beautiful as I believe. I'll suck everybody up. I'm gonna suck black, Lou. I'm gonna suck Jacob and Florida. I'll fly down the Florida. Suck him off in front of his mom. Hold on a fish. I'll suckoo. I'm gonna suck Jake up in Florida. I'll fly down the floor to suck him off in front of his mom Holding a fish. I'll suck off. I'll suck off DJ Lou smoking a sick while I smoke a cigarette. How's that?

I know I like all those things. I'll recreate a snake pit. I'll blow you in the snake pit and out of the snake pit But that's what you're saying is unrealistic things, but I do think Mean you doing a full one year life swap. I mean, going to a snake pit is unrealistic. It turns out, it turns out very unrealistic. What are you crazy? What do you think I know? Did you see the video that they keep set all these fucking bonfire fans is so far. They do. They keep sending the video with the guy literally passing out tickets to the snake pit. Look, please go in. Look here.

Take the head, he had the wristbands we were supposed to get. He's going, you want these and people going, no, nobody. No interest in going in the snake. No interest, they were too scared of what the sky was doing. I almost got tackled by a 70 year old twice trying to just get on the floor. Yeah. But where was I before that?

State Pit thing. You were there. I love that you smoked weed. God damn it. Hang on, I got you. I got you dude. I don't smoke weed. 37 years sober.

Three days ago. Hell yeah, congrats. Thanks buddy. 37 years. September 30th. Hey. If I can do it, you can do it. 37 years sober.

Yeah but don't do it. Have fun. If you don't have to do it, have fun said you're sober. Yeah, but don't do it You know if you don't have to do it have fun. Yeah, please enjoy it. Don't do what I did Yeah, dude, you were talking about the football game Patriots Eagles making a bet with me. Oh, I blow in for everybody Yeah, you'll blow everybody let's make a bet. Let's do a real bet a full one year Life swap I wouldn't do that you live a Christine. I would love to live with Christine. I raise Max and I, listen, I'll try the Jacob move on Don. I'll see you at work. You're not a wife tonight.

You're playing my wife for a year because of a bet your husband lost. Let's climb up in that loft. Dude, I'm telling you right now. We're gonna go to Tiny House. I'm gonna fish. I'm gonna join the Italian American Club. You're gonna make a sweetest dough. I'm gonna make a sweetest dough, a lean-to. I'm gonna be shitting from a rope swing.

Everything's gonna be Bobby for a year. And you will have to get into a trash television. Come in. Um, yeah. You said Dawn Snorke, so don't worry. Like Christine's gonna give you those sweet sounds to fall asleep too, if you like. Her snoring, we were supposed to bet. And I did record Dawn snoring about that. I didn't worry like Christine's gonna give you those sweet sounds to fall asleep to if you like her snoring I we were supposed to bet and I did record dawn snoring about I didn't do Christ. Oh, no, I have Christine's we have it here, don't we?

No, we never got Christine. Did we I thought we did I Were supposed to you were supposed to record I think I have it. I think Nope, that's not it. Oh, how was that? It was you present you practicing from American Idol. I don't know that Very dangerous that I'm just pushing these buttons. I want to be close to you, dude I got it right here. It's right here. This is dawn snoring. Are you ready? Yeah. Bingo was his name, oh, is that it? Right here? And this is it. No, that's not it. That's me.

How would you sing it again? I think that's me. Bobby and the shower, living in the shower. I'll do any record, those. That case is coming up with an ID, you know? Oh, that's on it. What was that? I don't know what that is.

Try it, fine. Man, just hit by it's only a scary game. Just slapping voice memos randomly of people This is this is all right. He has a hard is right is this it? Is this it? I don't know. I'm not looking at your phone Nope, oh my god. He's talking about me and your voice memos That's creepy. Here's my grievance as a big J this week. Talks over me. Still fat. You're gonna talk over me. I talk over you.

Ha, ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha. Still fat after all this time. Still so fat. Is this it? No, that's not it. This is dangerous, dude. So scary feeling.

I feel scary for you. Yeah. Fat. One of my voice memos is me saying the N wordword over and over again for a thing I do for Louis show That that you You sitting Dan Cook's hit. Oh, yeah Dan Cook's hit I forgot all about that I wish I didn't God damn it. I have it. I just don't oh now all this a good one

Oh, that's Not this year. They're having a rough year. I'll find it. I got dawn snoring and it's it's I mean it shook the roof after tiny house I'll get Christine tonight. I'll get dawn tonight. Yeah, I'll get dawn tonight. I mean dawn I was actually hit her three times and the other night, I actually punched her shoulder, like progressively harder and harder, and then I just went down to the couch. You know, you wanna hear something funny? Talk about how time and relationships

just equals the thing. You're just gonna have to stay in love, no matter what. I used to say I think that Christine, I'd be like, you know, why do you lose like the sexual chemistry and you're like my other relationship? And I was like, I mean, I got, I get home at like late night. We were just so past that kind of thing. I said, I get home late night when I come home, but she'd wake up for a minute and she'd run into the kitchen and get like milk and cookies, like, and then eat them and be right back asleep.

And Christine was sent my judge men all of that. And then Christine last night went from that snoring that I thought about recording wolf in while I'm trying to watch Megan the stallions half of the story of Megan and Tory lanes. And she's woven and then I went on like falling asleep. I make the bed go flat again. And as soon as the bed goes flat, Christine almost, I thought she was falling out of the bed. She woke up like a machine and went to the kitchen and got cookies. In scene. How many cookies?

One cookie. What is it a big cookie? No, it's not even a big cookie. It's not even about that. It's about how do you come up with and sleep that you were already? I mean, whoofin' for an hour and go, cookie. That's not a good thing in life, is it? I've done that with cheese. Just wake up and go get cheese. I've never woken up and gotten food. I wake up and go cheese.

Cheese. I just went and took a big bite of cheese. Back to the bed with a mouthful of cheese. A cookie's better than that. I love of cheese. Yeah, just cheese. A cookie's better than that, dude. I love the cheese. Dude, what did you do? I know we gotta go back.

First of all, we're gonna go make this bet. We're gonna make this bet for this weekend. A full life exchange. No, listen, we can't. That is a benefit to dawn. Because you clean, you like neat stuff. I do. You'll be fine.

You and dawn will hit it all. And you and Christine can live in fucking squallor and dog hair like animals No doggy bags. Oh, who cares dude. That's the cutest. It's our it's the dog shit So it's the cutest live with live with it the corners of the bed are all crumpled up I Can I in a yelling argument this weekend finally convinced Christine that I just don't understand why the dogs blankets That you've assigned to be her favorite blankets are the four hundred dollar blankets that we have and then she's like Okay, I'll put the dog bed there instead and she's really like I've made a real

The cakey-go blanket every cakey-go in our house is Christine's first priority is that as a dog gets to get her hair covered all over it. What's a KKKko living? What is it? The best blankets in the world. A little bonfire context. A little bonfire context. Hey bonfire context. KKKko, Bobby, you got one of these coming in your near future. I'd have to say actually pretty soon in the next few months. KKKko, we went to our friends house in Los Angeles once, our friend Michelle. She had a throw blanket that was to die for. Love the feel of it.

Slippery on both sides in a way that it never sticks to your legs. They're perfect blankets. They're perfect. And we asked her where she got them and she didn't know. And we looked up the tag on it and looked at the company and Christine ordered us one and we came in and we loved them we ordered two actually and then we realized we wanted both of them to be the same we didn't want the two different ones so Christine we talked about them on the air though

on bonfire once, soda ordered one. When we called the company back to see if we could, she's having a hard time exchanging it, they said I'm very, very sorry. Some radio thing happened and we're sold out complete. They're just a small company run by these women, right? All women and they make them. Wow, they look so soft. I love the big gray one.

There the best blankets. Now, Lou uses his as a smoking vest, but not anymore, buddy. Yeah, I don't know if I could ever get that smell out of there, though. Well, you can wash it, just don't try it. I heard that before. I'm gonna get it. Because of vagina. Oh, stink bus.

That's right. Cause you got a smelly cut on me. My blanket still smell like cod. Oh, go up to that red one. I didn't see that new ready up there. What's a red one? I don't know. The crimson. Oh crimson. I like the ash gray. What was the ash gray one? That was kind of hard. Bobby, they're perfect blankets. Oh, I love it. And they're, as you can see, looking at them, they're relatively pricey. Very pricey. That's a pricey blanket. These are low-end prices. They may have lowered their prices, actually. Yeah. You would love it for the tiny house. I can't imagine a better blanket for the tiny house.

There you go. Yeah. Well, that's what is the oversized ones, which is what we have. I want a king, a nice fat king. But the overs, maybe we have the, yeah, I think we have the oversized ones, which is what we have. I want a king, a nice fat king. But the overs, maybe we have the, yeah, I think we have the oversized, and I'll tell you Bobby, they're amazing. And the dog, Christine just like, isn't it cute that she is covering these completely in hair? And I'm the asshole somehow.

It's crazy. Justin Silver, Justin Silver, the dog trainer that we know, friend, the dog whisperer, that we know doesn't let his dog on his furniture at all. Our dog lives in our furniture because Christina's commenced me. This is the kind of leather they told me the store is supposed to get super scratched up. That's what she says.

That's not ever, ever been written down. It's never been written down anywhere. It's never been a sales pitch. It's false. Your dog can scratch this leather. It's never been written anywhere ever. It's never been a sales pitch. It's false. Your dog can scratch this leather. It's Italian. Nothing happens. It's, it's, oh, yo, yo, yo.

Yeah, wow. What are you gonna do? I mean, you gotta let that, look it. You gotta, you, you messed up on the dog. What do you mean? Well, when I got, we got, our two dogs died. She was like, let's get another dog. I'm like, we get another dog.

We're getting the Brad Pitt of dogs. I want a dog No dog here. I don't want to have to fucking deal with limp brushes. I want to Like a human hair dog. Yeah, if any God forbid anything happened to our dockets my next dog would be a yeah No shedding at all thing. Yeah, Bernadoodle. No shed. It's the only issue I have with our dog Yeah, I know I mean I said the dogs fault. Yeah dogs like what is it the the the the the the the Labrador's Look at Jacob's laughing as asshole because yes, he knows it's a $300 blanket that she's just having a dog

I mean by the way look zoom in on the picture Christine you can see in that black Bobby as you covered in dog hair, and it's a black It's a black blanket. You can't let the dog sleep on the black Blank you're not really supposed to what it's fucking crazy look Christine laughing You know why she comes at a pocket for nothing Christine might be a millionaire. I have no idea She hasn't gone to an or pocket and fucking four years everybody she had millions of dollars saved up It's very possible. In that couch, those cushions are actually $100 bills. It's crazy that she's doing this.

Our dog sheds like when she shakes, it's like raining hair. And then Christine goes, okay, we had an argument. I said she goes, okay, when I vacuum, like I'll make sure I vacuum like the furniture too. And I was like, please. And then the other day, I came home, she goes, I vacuumed and everything, I go, oh nice, you got the furniture and everything.

She goes, I gotta do the furniture like every day. I'm like the dog, it farts and 8,000 pieces of hair fall off of it every day. I have to do that multiple times times a day, you lunatic. I just live with Dawn for a year. Just give me Dawn for a year. Living with you is fucking taxing. I mean, it's, hey, it's not so.

Dude, I'm gonna get a maid. Oh, yes, I pay very much for it. We have, we haven't liked the last three maids that we've had. Christine, watch how you do. How do you not like a maid? I'll tell you exactly why. I'll tell you exactly why. I'll tell you exactly why. It's not this, not cleanup. We haven't liked the last three maids that we've had. Christine, why don't you not like a maid? I'll tell you exactly what. That's not clean enough for him.

It's not this not clean up. They don't do anything. Christine just goes in a room and just trusts them and she goes, well, when I came out, she was wiping down a thing. So like, I mean, the back, I just dusted the other day, the back of the TV in our room. Yes.

Okay. The back of the TV in our room. It was two years of dust on that thing. Do you have a little feather duster? We have several feather dusters. Yes. I bet you do. Is that a feather now? It's a, uh, it's

at your nickname, feather duster. It's a microfiber one. They're not great. I don't dust. Yeah, because your wife does. Because I'm a man. Men don't dust, Jay. I don't want to live in filth well, you know what you don't want to live in a fucking museum there is Way way amount of huge gray area between

Museum and what our house is If we switched yeah, we'll think my house people listening. I've seen it online. They think my house is disgusting. They think I'm a Slot anyone that's been in my house. If take a shoes off as disgusting take a shoes off in our house and go home with your first fucking socks. I also pay a lot of bills. So I also know bills. So I have health insurance. I pay internet bill. You pay. I pay my cell phone bill. Let's do it. Three bills. I pay. Do I say health insurance? You did.

That was the first thing you said. I pay for my doctors that my health insurance doesn't cover. That's fun. I mean, these are all things. I just don't pay rent. I do pay bills. You don't pay rent and you don't pay for food. Utilities.

Food. That's all I don't pay, she said, is rent. I also, by the way, I have my front share. Car insurance. The way that I wait on this manhand in foot, like I went and like set up, you know, for dinner He orders the food. Yeah, I set it all up. I put it all out I make sure you know whatever the sauce is everything are there for my friend saw me doing it And she was like the way she was looking at me was like what the fuck are you doing?

And I'm like I'm taking care of my boyfriend because he takes care of me But he acts like this side of things don't happen. Like I don't do stuff too. Yeah, she puts fucking takeout food in a paper plate. Bravo princess. I love you. The fuck are you talking? You're describing it very different.

I light a candle and I do like this shit. I put out placemats. I put this. I basically set the table. Put everything out. Bobby, he got she got these placemats, they're like this weird material that aren't placemats necessary at all.

And then she puts things on them, and then as they spill, it goes right through onto that leather, which is okay, doesn't matter because the leather's supposed to be destroyed and scratched up. I don't know if you caught that earlier. So it's fine. To die in leather is supposed to be destroyed.

It's okay to destroy that. Jacob, you have some thoughts. I'm shocked at one thing, like Christine's friends, like if Christine's doing this and her friends are blocking it, they're harboring. They're fucking dumb shifters back home. What are they doing for their boy? Nothing, they're all fucking lonely idiots. Yeah, you're friendly.

Because they won't even put a paper plate out for their boy. Do your friends have, do your friends have boyfriends and husbands? One is getting married. But the other one does it. Or a guy that didn't was the one who complained. She gave me eyes. Yeah, because she's lonely. Yeah, she's fucking lonely.

And no one pays for her dinner. So that's why she surprises up here. I don't think it should be a museum. When you come home, you should be able to live, it should look lived in a little bit. I think I fucking live up to my end of the bargain. And this one acts like I don't. Oh, crazy.

Please. It's fucking insane. Please tell me. Please tell me what you got that, though. I think I lived up to my end of the bargain. This really is like, so nighttime soap opera, like. I mean, it's crazy. Kristine, dynasty.

K. Kristine is Vamanos Luzotros. K. Borgay. A steelpala for its iska joke. Borgay. I have Borgay. You, Jay.

Yeah. I live with somebody like you. And it's taxing. Right? It's taxing. Sure. Yeah, it's a little taxing. But someone like me and what, the, the,

the magazines, like this, there's magazines on the table, they all have to kind of be together, right? We don't have a table like that, but that's not my thing. That's not my problem. The bed has to be made every day. Absolutely.

That's just nuts. Christine thinks that's the case though. I've always made the bed every day. Yeah, so I'm saying that's not like out of the realm. I don't make the bed. Your wife does though, doesn't it on? Of course she does. Every day.

I pay for everything. She better make everything. No. You never make the bed. I don't know, I sleep in it. Yeah. But I did pay for the bed. I'm gonna buy one of those covers. I'm't know, I sleep in it. Yeah. But I did pay for the bed. I'm gonna buy one of those covers.

I'm gonna buy one of those blankets for. I make the bed, I make the bed sometimes. Yeah. And when I do, I kill it. I should be a better husband though. I should do stuff. I should do things. I should wake up and make the bed.

I should do the dishes once in a while. I probably should do that. And I've been thinking about that. Like, I- That's all that matters. You thought about it, that was cool. I- I should do it.

You did your thinking. I just get past it. Let's switch. We'll switch. Me and Christine, but I get to stay at your place. You stay at my place. Sure. We don't switch that.

No, me and you switch lives. Yeah, you go to my house and I go to your house. It's great. I'll do it. Christine, you in. I'm in. All right. Cool. Now, do we get the sleep in the same bed as the wife? That's up to this. What's going on? I don't ask what goes on behind a couple's doors. I don't ask how you and Don sleep. It's not what my business. Don't ask me and don't sleep. Yeah. Yeah. Christine did say she wants to be a new pussy. Does it like be a new pussy? So Bobby, new pussy for your new penis. Yeah. Your new thin penis or thin Bobby, new penis.

New penis. Not a thin penis. No, I'm sure you have a bulky penis. I got a nice piece. I bet you do. I got a nice, I could take a picture of my piece right now. Yeah, I'll ask Christina to describe it for me Remember happens back there. I'm gonna get her a watercolor a little kit and she can paint it

But I'll be honest with you make sure you keep tissues next to you guys fuck palace because there's a lot of dog hair floating around because she doesn't vacuum Can I stop sure do I have to take you dog? I gotta see you. Yeah Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. You're having the life. You get my hairless dog. Of course. You get my, my Brad Pitt dog. It's in, you're that dog? Your Brad Pitt dog is going to be in love with me

when I leave, because I dog's gonna be able to do, I'll give it Kiki co-blankets. I'm gonna buy Kiki co-s for your dog. And my dog, you just go let it out in the backyard and it just goes poop. You don't have to, you don't have to go down the hall hit the button way for the elevator go out front. You have to watch so you can clean up the poop. Well no no dog goes around the yard and picks up the poop. Afterwards. Yeah. She'll like the dog will poop. She'll wake up in the next dance. She'll go around

and pick up the poop. The next day. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. What do you mean? Ice. What? Why would you? Spit it out big boy. Why don't you watch where they poop and you pick it up right away.

Or maybe you don't even have a poop in the yard. I mean, yard? I don't live on a fucking farm. I mean, it's, you know, you go in the backyard, you walk around and you, you pick up the poop. Put it to your yard. Yeah, but it poops. Yeah, but you have a poop and pee. Yeah. Out front. No, in the poop. Put it to your yard. Yeah, but it poops. Yeah, but you have a poop and pee.

Yeah. Now, front. No, in the backyard. No. What are you talking about? I would dog play all day in the backyard, but if you can avoid it, try to the poop, and if they do poop. The best part of how many yarders let in the dog in it,

and they poop in the backyard. And then you pick it up. That's crazy. What are you talking about? She really doesn't look like. I use Dawkins, but he does not like having an animal. I know. I know.

What do you want the dog to poop in the front yard? Front yard. No. Where are you from? Like with the sidewalk or the grass over by the street. I have a fenced in yard. It's the greatest thing ever. You just let it.

That's the greatest thing ever. And by the way, I'm not saying when you let your dog out doesn't ship, but you let your dog out too shit Yes, yes, that's crazy. Why that's what you do I would try to walk them still so they poop and pee not in the yard Where are they gonna poop and pee? On a walk on somebody else's yard. No Where are they gonna put you think my dog poops in the street side walker? No That's a city dog. That's a city dog. You're talking city dog. No, dude My dogs are suburbs dog. You open the backyard. You let them go you pick it up

There's a barrel out there. We put on the poop in we throw it out what I I'm a guest at your whatever your landscaping I create put we have a poop a scooper. The dog goes in the backyard, takes a dump. Poo, scooper is nice thing to have, that sounds great. Poo, scooper. I just wouldn't do like a couple days worth. I'd have to make you do that. I wouldn't do a couple days, we do like a, you know, the dog will poop at the end of the day

or at some point of the day, dog will go up and pick up the poop or I'll go out and pick up the poop. You still a lap. Sounds like a lot of shit though, no? No, it's one shit a day, the shits once a day really one time a day Buddy buckle up dog and things go down all those halls and escalate elevators That

Having a dog in the city in a dorm in building sucks a dick. Yeah, potty training her was right Oh, it's the worst going in the elevator and they got to go and it's cold out and you're gonna go in front of the building and then other people with their stupid dogs want to talk to you. Hey, ugh, it's the worst. I do it. I love it. I wake up in the morning. My dog sees me. I go out. I open the gate. The dog goes right in. I shut the gate. She barks when she's done. Roof, roof, roof. I come out. I thank you. I go a little more much other than that. Ah, dude, what's wrong with your gay ass dog? I know. She has a horse throat. And, dude, I gotta live with this thing.

A little more much other than that. But, she comes back in, she curls up on the hardwood floors. I have hardwood floors. I'm calling the dog, she. I'm not calling the dog, they. It's a she. Okay. Doodles. It have hardwood floors. I'm calling the dog she. I'm not calling the dog they it's a she okay, doodles It's great dude P that's it. I agree doodles is gonna be my best friend in the world Do my dog comes when I go on the shed to that going to zoom thing? So you'll come in a lie on the floor next to me. I love doodles. No hair. Yeah, no hair

Well, I'm a okay if you decide to sleep in Bebba, Christine on this bet because I'll tell you it doesn't matter because there's going to be a dog directly between you really stretching out, really taking up your space. And even if it was taking a Christine space, she won't know because she's already asleep snoring, you see. And then you're going to be afraid to make too much movement because you're where she's going to get up and start getting cookies in the middle of the night. Well, I hope you're going to be alone in the king size bed, California king with doodles on one side. Okay. And Don is in Max's bed. Okay. Up in a bunk bed with him. Yeah. Every night she goes

in with him. What's your bedroom TV situation? No TV in the bedroom. For real? We don't have TVs in the bedroom. Okay, with that, I'll tell you why. Now I'm living seven days a week, the same way I live on the weekends. Tell me time on my computer, and I'm okay with that. Right. Tell me time on the computer.

Yeah, I got a big, I got a big king, California king bed. Stretch out. Sideways, you go sideways on my bed. Yeah, I will, I, I want whack off in your bed. I want you to. Yeah, I will, I, I won't whack off in your bed. I want you to. Okay, I will then. I'll be offended if you don't.

I probably will. I will. I'll be offended if you don't. I'm going to do it. You're going to get it. If you come back to me after a month and you say, I'd be like, go fuck yourself. Do you have the bed that moves the I don't the base? I don't so then please also yes whack off in my bed. Yeah, it's so nice the way you can get all those little

positions. Yeah, you get like whack off and really look at your wiener Can your legs are up? I never thought of that I have a bunch of pillows. Maybe I'll prop myself up like I have one of those beds. Yeah get used to it well, huh? I just think it would be interesting if you both whacked off for the week, and then you both blue lighted it the beds to see who's comes everywhere.

Where it went and why, like, that would be great. I think why it happened. Brand new blankets, brand new comforters, and then after the year we see how much load is all over the thing. There'd be none on your bed because I put a hat on mine. Oh really?

Yeah. I was gonna say... I like a hat. I very recently this year started making a toilet paper hat for my penis. So when I come it all goes into the toilet paper hat and then I just take the hat off and then I clean up the rest. It seems so. It's taking away too much from the jerk. I need the jerk to be pure. What?

I need the jerk to be pure. It's too mechanical then when I'm already thinking about like the load gathering. Yeah. It takes away the purity of the jerk. Yeah, I guess you're right, but I'm at my age. I don't want to deal with it. Yeah, you're doing a functional whack though.

I need to get this out of me so I can do this next thing of the day. Yeah, I got you to do I got stuff to do I need to get this evil out if I jerk off now I'm like oh feel a little horn dog. I'm gonna go see what's up. Yeah, I don't want to get so horny to where I'm You know, it's 2 30 in the morning Monday on the West Village You know standing in a park waiting for some weird shit to happen. Hey ladies, how crazy was that on Skank? You did Skanks last night. Skanks was great.

What a fun show. No, I like about Skanks. You guys always have fun games. It's such a ridiculous, holy shit, politically incorrect, funny show. You always get fun, little little silly awful games to play and yesterday was in the game so much as uh... a contest were doing our ring girls in worst life contest the worst life we thought was going to be some of the most terrible shit and it was it was real

real bad the worst life contestants yesterday but then our ring girl contest was the guy, I guess he hired a prostitute. He did a memento style on us, he did backwards. Yeah. He was, look, he was interviewing a girl like Casting Couch porn style and he asked her, he was like, he's like, what's your name?

She said her name and he goes, and what do you hear for? So like to be a ring girl at Skankfest? And like, it seemed like, not as you were doing against her will, like she was just obviously being coached on what to say. And then he went and shows you that hours, like, three hours earlier, we're 30 minutes earlier, it was him just picking her up at a bus stop. She's like a homeless girl or something.

And he's like, would you do this? And she's like, no, what guess would you do it for a beer? She says yes. And then it cuts to her doing that interview again. And then her peeing on him. And then what was the last thing? I dropped off at that. Yeah, you peed on her.

When he was, because I didn't understand, like the angle of the camera, I didn't understand who was doing what to who. He was laying in the tub, covering his weer with his hand Okay, she was peeing. Oh, you just saw her legs, but she was peeing on him. Okay. I didn't I didn't pick I thought I didn't know what it was. I knew there was pee coming out of somebody But I kind of I kind of backed out at that point

Yeah, right on me. I don't like is it weird that I don't like seeing realistic porn Like that crazy stuff if I if that was in a movie like a porn movie Somehow it's more palatable than seeing a real life human being do it Like knowing that this somebody going cut all right, listen, give us a more water. Let's try this again You know, but some some girl. No, I'm the opposite. I like the thing where I think it seemed like Brought my wife to the woods and here's a bunch of strangers fucking her face I'm sure that's all set up too, but I buy into those stories Hey, everyone wore this dirty bookstore and my fat wife's gonna suck off any guy who wants it bring it.

If, uh, okay, so if, if the Eagles win, yeah, can we do something realistic? We can't. Well, of course, also, it's not even a real bet. What does it mean? Who loses? We swap lives. Yeah, we both lose. I'm sorry. I love you. Okay, but this I would live with Christine for a month.

This gives everyone a reason to watch this game. We'll make a bet for winning lose. Yeah. In the off chance that one of the one ties that'll happen in football this year is game one Patriots versus Eagles. Yeah, we do a complete wife life swap If there's a tie to tie that means they have to get through a One overtime It was to tie at the end of one overtime, right? Yeah, then you Ends is a tie

It's only one overtime, right? Yeah. Yeah. It's just one, yeah, yeah. Okay, so if there's an overtime, then it ends in a tie. Yeah. Time runs out in the overtime at the tie. A full, a complete one year life swap.

Okay. One year? One full calendar year. I don't know. The show length. Birthdays. The show will be over. Birthdays. Everyone's birthday.

We have holidays, a holiday season for sure. Christine's gonna hate me as you're a week when I'm like, do they make weed that doesn't smell? And then it's gonna be, and then in the year's he Christmas cards, me, Max, Dawn, and Doodles, all wearing the same sweater, like, like, laughing, and Doodles all wear in the same sweater, like, like, laughing and how crazy things are.

Oh, it's gonna be great. I'm gonna be so clean cut. Oh, me and Christine. I might start wearing dockers. No vacations we go on. Every Thursday we be just gone. We travel, we get a little boat. We got a little boat and tour the canals and Belgium.

Oh, well, you know, unless Lewis makes you her stay home because she has to do 100% of the work that he has to do. Then, then what? Yeah. I'd have to listen to that, bitch. Yeah, they do a lot of Lewis. The world is dealing with Lewis today, everybody, because it's actually a big day in comedy all around.

They're about our brother, Lewis, Jay Gomez, releasing his 30 minutes with special available at Think Now. It's now six PM. No, six PM Eastern. Fact, 15, 20 more minutes, under 20 minutes. Yeah, in 18 minutes everybody, the premiere of Lewis J. Gomez. You have to.

30 minutes with. Let me tell you something, Lewis, everybody Lewis is known for podcasting, Lewis is known for, you know, just being, just an influencer, you know, the mother fucker, when it comes to all the everything else thing. What are we gonna react to? His standup, his special, it's fucking great.

You gotta watch this special, it's great. And you guys are putting on gas digital, it's putting out, and I love it because they've done this before with people, other platforms. And it's always like two people that are good and the rest are kind of mediocre and there's a couple stinkers. Everybody that's coming out is David Kurtz already out.

Kurt Dave Dave's just insane Kurt. Of course he's a fucking genius. We got column. We got rich boss Jordan Jensen. Jordan Jensen. It's great. But today is 15 minutes everybody Lewis J go man. Go fucking blow it up and tell everybody

Don't just watch it Retweet it post share it comment comments important. Yeah, do all that help over for listen It's big day in comedy's big comedy day You get almost an hour and a half of new content because you got 30 from Lewis. Yeah, and Shane Gillis's new Netflix came out today also. So they got to release the same day. Yeah, both of them fucking killer. So check it out.

Make it a night, everybody. Check out Lewis' first. Check out Lewis' first. And then go watch. Shit, well, share it, comment, blah, blah, blah. And then you're like, woof, I sure am tired from putting in all that work, making sure Lewis' special gets out there.

I've heard myself a little dessert treat. Oh, you know, I watch some shingos. Yeah, and make sure you tag us, me and Jay, and Bonfire, in all the retweets. Yes, and all the tag us, too. And that's because of us. And then also, in that same retweet, direct people to our specials while you're out of the...

And then, buddy, it was gonna work back to his self. And also, I have a new special member right now. I mean, yeah. No, it's Graham's so proud of him. I know he's proud of it. It was great to watch it happen that night, and everything. I was there for the taping. Yeah. I'm the voice of intro on it, whatever, I mean, yeah. No, it's grabbed so proud of him. I know he's proud of it. It was great to watch it happen that night and everything. I was there for the taping. Yeah.

I'm the voice of intro on it. Whatever, I don't care. But it's pretty great. Who gives a shit, but that's awesome. Hahaha. Can we make a bet if the Eagles win like a legitimate bet? Yeah, let's do a legitimate bet. A legitimate bet.

If the Eagles win or if the Patriots win, let's make a legitimate bet. Money or a thing. I should be a thing. I think it's a thing on the show. win. Let's make a legitimate money or a thing I should be a thing. I think a thing on the show. Yeah, money's not gonna affect us to come Yeah, who cares? Who cares? Cash is cash. We're not about that Let's see. What are we doing the show as far as lost pets? You have to get a massage by a gay man I go a gay masseuse a naked massage. We had that happen for DJ Lou No, I was a good one. You got rubbed down me and you had the bet where I had to give you a massage.

And you gave me one. It was a really lovely massage. You were very tight. I thought none of these things were bets. They just happened. Very possible. But these are just things I'm saying that in the realm of the show, what could we make this bet?

What do we do? You know what I mean? You make someone do the fart cast mask or something. Or do we try to get is it jack as a get Jack Cassie style or is it? Some sort of a punishment. Why don't we open it up to the fans and maybe they have something? What's the bet? Yeah, it could be a filly or maybe it's a full you have to make a full-on commitment to call This isn't a bad one. It should be more of an eventful thing on the show

We have to do something but I would also put up there whoever wins this game. The other person has to call the cheese stick or steak and cheese for the rest of the year only that you can't say steak and cheese anymore. You'd have to say cheese steak or vice versa. I have to stay steak and cheese. Hey, you want to get a steak and cheese when we go to fill it. Oh, it'll kill me. Steak and cheese. It's a steak and cheese. It's not though. It's more steak than cheese. It's a cheese steak and cheese. When we go to filly, oh, it'll kill me. Steak and cheese.

It's a steak and cheese. It's not though. It's more steak than cheese. It's a cheese steak, that was what it's called. It's cheese, whatever is the most of. It's born there. It's a crazy thing. Of course it is.

It's not, you guys just fucking took it and this is our thing. It was not born and filly. It was born in Boston. And you might be right about that. Boston is a bunch of pussy's for you to go up there and take your shit. You're giving this. That's our steak and cheese. Yeah, now it's a cheese steak. Yeah, now it's a fucking cheese steak

Exactly a shit. You know what fuck the Patriot. Oh, yeah, Kyla get up Goards. Yeah, fuck you Bobby. Who's your cool starting quarterback this year? Fucking Jasmine mix wow, man. That's crazy, dude. I don't't fuck around bro. That's crazy. I'm a fan. I'm a fan fan You're a fake fan. What yeah, dude. You got to know everybody's name and shit. I don't know everybody's name I'm a you could take the quarterback out tomorrow and just put fucking Joe McFly in and I'm still a fan Yeah, man, Jasmine fly. He's well, Joey short for Joe's but dude. He said Jasmine McFly before. Yeah man, Jasmine he flies. He's fucking so slow. Well Joe is short for jazz. But dude, he was... Dude, he almost won the high Z.

He almost won the high Z. Oh he's got that high Z? Dude, I don't fucking play that game dude. I don't play that fucking game. About knowing the team. Dude, I don't need to know the team. I'm there for them no matter what. No you're not.

I'm there. What was the record last No you're not. No you're not. I'm there. What was the record last season? Fuckin' 17 and 6. That's impossibility. There's only one extra game a year now. 17 and 6. Oh you're not counting the pre-season? For the last two pre-season?

Come on man. Blacklue, are you surprised at hell little bobby knows about boston sports i am because i kind of remember you guys going back and forth when the eagles and the patriots were in the super bowl for now is a thing and fairness though that was a bobby i think uh... before max was born

more max is for twenty seventeen always at the bill yeah yeah yeah no i was thinking that we also me and Bobby also had it in 2006 or whatever it was Remember we had that one way early in our friendship. Yeah, I did no look at I know Calvin's a fucking he's a good Okay, you just looked it up. I did not have a computer. You don't make me a computer. It's an audio It's an audio it's an audio medium black Louvre's computer everybody here to check out I'm a Dan maybe got a fucking computer But you know who didn't get a computer? BK Bob oh Bob are no no computer. I got nothing to look anything up on do you not have a keyboard?

You have a computer right there's nothing on it Don't turn him you might be liberty for a year. So why don't you watch your mouth? Yeah, Christine By the way, I'm asking about a keyboard. He has a phone and when Bobby Completely checks out of the show to go check things and then he knows I'm a gabaniddy It so I'll just start talking to whoever and I see You ask me anybody on the team. God of course you can you're looking do I have a you don't look at it You want to know who you want to know the LB is What's an LB fucking line bag?

Okay, that's the first thing you've gotten right at at all today. You want the CB? Mm-hmm. What's the CB? Kona back. Okay. Yeah, I want the LS What's that line? Succeeding nope The line's suck it. Yeah The line's suckitation. Yeah, we had the big thing at the seller a few years back when the eagles, when Nick Folls, triumphantly destroyed. Whatever, that was bullshit.

And dismantled the, yes? Please don't forget the time the eagles lost to the cowboys. You had to eat very hot wings. I don't want to forget that. Oh yeah, yeah, I need super, super hot wings. Dude, that's a good one. Super hot shit. We do super hot shit.

It changes my day though. No, but actually somebody shits, and then we pull hot, it's hot shit. And you have to take a bite of super hot shit. Okay, you heard of your first, let's get it in stone. Bobby and Jay's hot shit challenge. Yeah, but everybody, first of all,

we do everybody shit and we put different, like Christine shit and then Lou's shit, Black Lou's shit. And we put different type of spices on the shit I like that it's like hot ones but you know grosser with more puke and we get Matthew McConaughey to join in hey now all right all right let's take a sit down for some hot shit Christine's poops a little grain a lot it must be using that smoothie Bobby and Don got this thing tastes like midnight cookies All right, so we I think we do a hot challenge. Yeah, yeah, I'm just freaked out every time Jacob's computer goes Blurry I feel like different people or less people are in that picture behind him am I just high?

Who what is that picture? Is that a rich boss? Painting we think it's a lie for some reason, but I think it's the sunlight hitting it. Is that Italian 17th century artwork? No, for sure. It's old parents shitting their room. What is it? No, it's a painting of a poem. What is it? Is when your parents met? It's a painting of a poem.

Of a poem? Yeah. What does that mean? What does that mean?? It's a painting of a poem. Of a poem? Yeah. What does that mean? What does that mean? Yeah, I'm thinking what you said that. So it's a depiction of a poem, the lady of Shiloh, I think, or what is it of?

It's a woman on a boat. Boat. By herself? Are you even a stroke right now? What's wrong? It's a woman on a boat. Boat. By yourself? Are you having a stroke right now, which will be the woman on a boat? And who's over to your other head, Beethoven? Oh, that's not, I have no idea what that is. You just don't know who a picture of a woman

who stares at you while you sleep is. That's terrifying. The lady of shallot. Is that it? I believe that's right, yeah. What is the poem, how I read it right now? Is that it I believe that's right. Yeah, what is the poem? I'm gonna read it right now I'm written by Alfred Lord Tennyson

Part one on either side the river lie long fields of barley and of rye Bye-bye Miss American pie Drove my Chevy to the left. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it. That's not. That's not it. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not it. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That the left. That's not it. And the left was dry. That was the good old boy who's drank whiskey and rye, saying this will be the day that I die. This will be the day that I die. Thank you. Very good, Jay. It's good painting. It's good painting.

Beautiful poem. I get it now. I get it. Now I finally get it. All right, what type of hot stuff? Eating hot stuff for a loss? I see it. Now I finally get it. All right, what's, what type of hot stuff? Eating hot stuff for a loss? I see that. How bad you just don't make handle that shit.

I don't, my, my new one? I don't know. That's a risk I'm willing to take. It would have to be like, before it's like chocolate covered cricket or something. Ooh, yeah. Two things like that. Okay, I mean, here's Two things like that. Why?

Okay, I mean, here's the thing, that would be a real loss because I won't do well eating chocolate covered crickets. I won't either. That'd be a good one, because I'll throw up. I'll throw up, too. That's great, let's do it. Chocolate. What were in your whole day?

You'll just throw up and continue on. Yeah, and then they'll lay eggs in your stomach and then they'll hatch and then you'll have more crickets shoot out in the middle of the night. I'm pay with bugs, man. Come on, I'm the middle of the night. I'm paying with bugs man. Come on. I'm bad with bugs man. I'm bad with bugs.

What's... Come on, I tried. What kind of chocolate things do you get? Let's take a break. We have to take a break. We have to take a break. So let's take a break when we come back. We'll talk...

Well, let's look up. What kind of gross things you get ordered and actually eat. It's good to be back. Glad we're back. We're back. No more vacations till Christmas. Oh, we're fine. I miss you. I don't like not talking to you during the week.

I mean, like this. I know, dude. I really did. I was so excited to come back. I mean, I love the vacation. It was great, but I'm very excited. I was, I was, I was, I was excited. And the comeback and find out you might even have to be.

There's an outside shot. You don't have to be with your family for one whole calendar year. Pretty great. And I get to be with the girl of my dreams. You have to be with the girl your dreams. I'm sorry, the girl of Jacob's dreams. Yeah. And you guys can sit in a squallor while me including just raw dog all over

that sparkling house. Yeah, you come back and it's just dirty. There's pizza boxes everywhere. We're having a good time. Oh, Jacob, those counters are going to be so clean. When I shoot a load, it's gonna go. Excuse. Being Christine, I remember the apartment,

where you're gonna be traveling. Yeah, no kid. Mm-hmm. We're gonna take the dog with us. Yeah, traveling the world. Yeah. Good. Well, make sure you bring dog treats and cookies for Christine.

No, no, no, no, no. What's up, Jacob? Yes. He goes. Just saying. What? I didn what I hear you said she goes Christine yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean am I as far as my dream. Yeah, yes You're in for a good time. Yeah, and I've heard she parties in Jacob's dreams. She parties. She grinds your teeth She's grinds your teeth at night. I am supposed to wear a night guard

She's got her teeth. She's got her teeth at night. I am supposed to wear a night guard. She's supposed to wear a night guard. Also, both of us in the last couple of weeks have done, uh, didn't know the other person was awake and like a real heavy ass blast. Really? I did one where I looked up and I apologized

right after I looked up and she was like, already sitting up in bed and I was like, oh man, that was so big and loud. But Christine, when I was leaving for my last road gig, when I got up in the morning and the thing, she just sent a few loudies back to back and I was like, good, but I ran, I'm leaving. Good bye.

Wow. Do you grind your teeth? No. Oh good. By like my jaw, doing my jaw, like my jaw. Oh, you're pretty careful. No, I know my jaw is all fucked up. You're gonna smash in new teeth like teacups.

I have a night card also. Oh good, that's attractive. I have a night card too. Yeah, we have a night card. It's got a dog between us. Don't worry, everything's fine. Hey everybody, thanks for listening. That was just a portion of our actual Sirius XM radio show.

If you want the whole thing, go to SiriusXM.com slashbombfire for a special offer. That's right, and go to bigjcomedy.com and robbercallylive.com to check out our standup dates coming to a city near you. Go lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo Bye!