The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Master Baker (feat. Nikki Dinki)

Episode Date: December 14, 2023

Celebrity Super-Chef, Masterbaker Nikki Dinki finds chemistry with Bobby.

I'm Bobby Kelly and it's Big J. Ocarson. We're actually a full radio show on Series XM, not just a podcast. For full episodes of the Bonfire, you can listen on the Series XM app. Go to seriesexm.com slash Bonfire for a special offer. And now the Bonfire with Big J. Ocarson and Robert Kelly. The Bonfire, if I can tell, Series XM 103. Big J. Ocarson, the great Robert Kelly across from me. It's our final live show of the week.

Tomorrow you're gonna get to hear our, no not tomorrow. Not tomorrow. We did a pre-record for tomorrow. Next week you're gonna get to hear our holiday show that was very successful. I was the first one I was a part of fully. I've been a part of it very very like a little little bit guest before

Sure, and we've done it. We did it at a skankfest. I've done it, but Dan was there poo-pooing your whole presence I know I don't know about that and now this time I kept him actively away. No, well, I mean, to make sure that Robert Kelly could shine. I don't know if you noticed that the crew attitude, everybody else was on point last night. They were. They shaped up. Especially one person, Jacob, was really focused in on all of us last night.

Yeah, well, we got a couple hours more away from his shrine to Dan. He has in his house. It's Titanic memorabilia and then pictures of Dan, just with his hands on his chin. Yeah. We have an awesome guest hanging out with us in the show today coming in right away on the show because we kept flipping her time around.

She's a friend of the show celebrity super chef, Master Baker, the gorgeous. What? It's like Master Baker. Master Baker. Oh God. Copyright when? Yeah. It's like Master Baker. Master Baker. Oh, God. Copyright when you make that the name of a book.

Master Baker. Yeah. Just turn a bed with a cake, cover and a junk. Yeah. Actually, it would probably sell better than my other book. Hey, oh, that'd be so great. Join Nikki Dinky's Only Fans and you can watch her Master Baker.

It is the great Nikki Dinky, everybody. Just leave Michael. Oh, you know, I don't usually get introductions like that. That is special. That was a good one. That made my ears itch. I know. I got a little uncomfortable, but it's fine.

The lights are a little bright today. It's a little fun. We're videotaping. We're videotaping. I know. What are you talking about? We can't have it dark Dracula when we're trying to give video. Is it nice when it's dark?

It is kind of nice though. Because I feel like I can be a little dirtier. You're like to give video. Isn't it nice when it's dark? It is kind of nice though, because I feel like I can be a little dirtier. You're like, you're on the other side. No, turn the fucking lights off, Lou. Get them off. Turn that video off. What are you gonna do, girl? Oh, wow, it's so dark.

Don't turn them off. Guys, uncomfortable again. What if she turned it back on us? She was naked. She was naked with just cupcakes on her tits. But those cupcakes have carrots in them. Yes. And that's always the secret. Oh, yeah. They those cupcakes have carrots in them. And that's always the secret. Oh, yeah. They actually have beets in them today. Beets. What I'm waiting for.

You're going to ship blood, Bobby. It's going to look like blood. I already do. Okay. But this one is just going to look like blood this time. It's not going to look like coffee grounds. Now, Nikki has never failed at crow barring in unnecessary healthy ingredients into very delicious baked goods. Because that looks decadent. It does, and that's the idea, guys. We don't have to make it super healthy. I think what she likes to do is look at you

and give you the bad news when you're enjoying it. It's good, right? You go. Really chocolatey goes, except it's lime abeans. Four pounds of lime abeans. The frosting is made. Oh my God. The frosting made of wood. Yeah.

You should shine a flash into your chin when you tell people it's in your food. I don't know why the lime abeans is very funny there. I never thought of the mis-a-foney vegetable. How would you feel if I told you? Most of that cake is soca-tash. So that is made with beets. So this is a Brooklyn blackout cake and it is a dark chocolate cake infused with beets

which really do bring out the richness of the chocolate and then there is an avocado pudding inside and an avocado frosting. I used to call my ass girl from that in high an avocado pudding inside and an avocado frosting. I used to call my ass girl from that in high school avocado pudding plus. Yeah. She was Mexican and a squirt her. Yeah, she had a yeast infection. Brad, I'm not usually how you talk about my food, but it's good to be back.

No, no, no, not the food. Sorry, not the food. You heard of here first. Nikki Dinky's food is better than a yeast infection. I'll put that in the forward I write for master baker you do a book. I can't imagine why my PR team didn't suggest this before. I say fire them. Fire them and start fresh. So there's avocados but avocados is the consistency you're looking for. Not the taste

right? Yes. So with all of my recipes, it's definitely more about the vegetables enhancing the dishes, but in a very subtle way. So it's a little bit of like a hidden veggie kind of thing, but truly the avocado here is your fat. It's your creamy bait. What do you call me? Do you just say I'm fat? You just say avocado.

You just say avocado. Side note, you're fat. I think that's what I heard, right? Avocado gives you the creaminess. Avocado, you're fat. Okay. She just subliminaled you. Avocado, you're fat. I think that's what I heard, right? Avocado gives you the creaminess. Avocado, you're fat. Okay, so- She just subliminaled you. Avocado, you're fat.

Gives me the consistency seriously. Do something about it. And- Yeah, yeah. Your surgery, crystal mighty. And I use beats in there, you're ugly too. But the thing is, is the beat enhances the flavor. You can't read.

Listen, your thing is, you're not Dan. I actually use raisins on the top. You have three different fathers and none of them love you. And then really what I find is it's able to get the vegetables into you in a delicious way. Yeah, all that. I really have just a cake that's more nutritious for you. I can't wait. I like to think that we inspired Nikki because she is now also doing a podcast called you're so creative Available wherever you listen to podcasts. Is it fun? You haven't fun doing it? Yeah, I am. I really am Are they coming out already or you are like banking a bunch? No, we're on episode four I did bank a bunch, but now we are out there in the world

You know my first job in food was on radio WBA and I'm 0.5 in New York. Well, that's your radio voice. You just threw on that. Thanks for having me. Hey, come check out my cake. Yeah, and this is very, very different than that show, but it's fun.

It's a nice way to talk to people. What was the radio show you were doing? What was the word? You guys are going to love this. It was called the ArtC Fartsy Show. Okay. Our producer was trying to really kind of live and up this public radio station. So we did arts and culture around New York

and I covered food and we also did, you know, theater and art shit. Jacob, everything you're typing is coming through the speakers. Yeah. And this is this show should be your show. The Artsy Fartsy show. Yeah. After last night.

Oh, Jacob. Oh my god. What happened last night?? Jacob Jim McClure just showed us in the hallway video of Jacob. It was so crazy looking. He's got his jacket, which did not even strike me how much of a direct, a cold little director. Yeah, he was being and the rolled up paper. And I was standing. No, I know, but I'm saying just you standing on stage and that thing with the with the scarf on still And you're directing things. We're gonna need everybody bringing around here. We're gonna do a click on rap shot Can you bring the lights up that it's gonna be during loan one and two please that little That's great. Yeah, bring up a little here in the wedge a little bit in the wedge, please is Bobby here was Bobby J

Where are they are they here yet? Yeah, Jacob you are artsy far to his hell But all this makes him sound really sexy honestly sure like he's got a little mascot on he's directing people He's you know asserting his authority Don't say no Jacob's little he has a little jacket. It's a little mascot. Yeah, he has a little his little bomber jacket This is why Max Kelly is no respect for you Bobby son. I got to kick some asses sometimes to get things done. Yeah, you really do You get to kick a little ass sometimes make make a difference in the world to try say So it wasn't a cooking show on the radio it was no it was covering arts and culture in New York So it covered everything from theater to food to

Other stuff that I can't remember because it's been a while. Was it boring? It was a little boring, but we really did try our very best. I think my segments were as entertaining as possible in that form. Do you have to do things that you didn't really give a shit about? You're like, ballet? It was a... No, I only covered food. So I... You did the food.

Yeah, I was just covered in food. So it was not bad. She had to do like a one woman show about scarfs and rape That was someone else's job That was 10 o'clock hour. Oh, man. I'd like actually that would be great I'd love to find some of those but you know, I did always love the radio I think it's a great environment when you're in this very weird. I mean, I prefer it with the lights off But it's a very intimate environment and you have a microphone and I feel like it really allows you to be your most authentic self.

Sounds really deep for what we're doing here, but you can't. No, but it is, and that's why often we get in trouble for forgetting that people are listening. I was talking in a room. Yeah, and if we get we're doing radio and we're not on a podcast Talking shit me and Bobby brought up our friend Jim Norton's Oh boy and him and his wife wife there you go trans you get well, you have to say that no you do It doesn't make sense if we don't you could say that But you don't have to you could just say wife at this point they have a wife is shipped for sure

But Nikki dinky's got to know what's going on under the hood if you know what I'm saying. I mean, Nikki has a dinky. Yes. Yes. Her name is Nikki too. Her name is Nikki. And it should be Nikki Dinky.

Wow. Nikki Dinky. Yes. You should be Nikki Vaggie. You should do a podcast together. Nikki Dinky and Nikki Dinky. Nikki and Dinky. Nikki and Dinky.

Nikki and Dinky. Nikki and Dinky. New podcast partner. So I'll tell you what, she's made for this. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Nikki Norton is- She's an influencer. I mean, I saw the screen. We had it out. Um, but so we watched this video and of course, this comedians and uh, friends of Jim. Uh, uh, we, you know, we made it out of it. We're having some good, we're having some good laughs at about it.

Well, in a respectful way, Jim's a's a friend we love him we're happy for him i mean one of the funniest things i've ever heard of my life they came out of jay's mouth which uh... this is what's gonna what do you say i said this is the show it's gonna make zombie patrice come back from the grave patrice o'neill was uh... apparently the comedy glue that made everybody knuckle batshit Before he passed away Since then everyone's dead or gay or buyer trans, but so we we were having a light-hearted ribbing

At the shows, but then we me and Bobby got laid it late at night at an hour We were usually don't we don't get texts from Jim, but we got to mean also me and Jim's, let me say to preface me and Jim's relationship is such that I don't have his number in my phone. It was just a phone number. So I got a text what I saw was to Bobby and it was from some number to me and Bobby.

And Jim's one of my close friends. Yeah, like really, you know, him and Nick And Jim's one of my close friends. Yeah. Like really, him and Nikki have been over for my house for Thanksgiving together. I can still explain that one to Max. But the thing is, Oh, well, you have to explain that he was gonna wonder why he did build

that third bathroom. But we made fun, whatever. Bobby, the joke was, you joking me. The joke was that you already, for some reason, your house have a male female bathroom. Buddy, I did not. And then you have to build a third one, like North Carolina didn't want to do, but I remember.

I didn't joke rugby, but I bought a Kelly due because I didn't get it. Oh, big difference. Joe gets it. The third bathroom. Yeah. But we were doing it, but we both, you know, when you make fun of something, whatever,

you don't know what you really said. We're just trying to make each other laugh and... No recollection of what I said at all. And we're pro... We're promoting the show too, because we want that to be successful We were saying that a bit of that And then we got the thing and I looked at it like, oh fuck, what do we say? And I didn't know what to say back

And I was waiting for Jay to say something And I was just gonna tag along, because I didn't know if it was sarcastic Hey man, thanks for plugging the show. You fucking pieces of shit. Or, hey guys, really thanks for plugging the show. I tell you, it couldn't have been written more. He goes, hey guys, thanks a lot for talking about the video. Really appreciate it. And I read that in every possible

Myzner technique way you can read it. Let's try it. Really appreciate it, buddy. Really, really appreciate it. Super appreciate it can read it. It's really appreciate it, buddy. Really, really appreciate it. Super appreciate it. Appreciate it. I heard it every possible way in my head. And Bobby goes, what are we gonna do?

I go, I just assume pretend it never happened and move forward with my life. This is what he said. He wrote, thank you guys for talking about the video. We really appreciate it. That's pretty, but if you read it like this, hey, thanks guys for talking about the video. We really appreciate it. That's pretty, but if you read it like this, hey thanks guys for talking about the video, we really appreciate it.

Yeah, really appreciate it guys. Yeah, if that level of sarcasm, like you can't get that through a text. You have to do like a emoji of it. But you don't know how insecure me and J.R. We're like, we've made somebody angry at us. And now we have to go to bed with someone angry at us So he texts me like it's played it. That is like yo, man. I don't know how to take this and I was like I'm gonna take it either

So we're talking about like who's gonna respond and he's like what he goes? I'll just never respond ever I'll just pretend never happen to move forward I didn't see that so man.. He's never going to come up to me but hey what about this? It's not a relationship. It would just he'd move on also. But if he doesn't know you well enough to have you like in his phone or Risa Versa, I don't think he's going to send a heavily sarcastic text to both of you. Maybe to this guy over here Robert Kelly. So right so I was like maybe not sarcasm. Maybe not sarcasm, but flat out anger. Yeah, it was flat out. I guess. You get the shit. So I wrote back, can't wait to see more apps

from you guys. Wow. This. So funny. So Bobby. I wrote guys. Bobby jumps in. He wrote guys.

That's not a problem. That's gonna be a recurring issue throughout this story. Um, Bobby, yeah, Bobby writes, read it again. Can't wait to see more EPS from you guys. So funny. So funny. So I go. What do you say it like that?

Right, so I text Bobby off the side and I go, dude, you went too big, that was crazy. Can't wait to see more EPS. Yeah, but then he wrote, he used a big word, which I mean. I'll tell you what, let me tell you. So before you read it, Bobby, Yes. I'm not proud of word which I'll tell you what let me tell you so I before you read it Bobby Yes, I'm not proud of this. I didn't know what to do. I panicked I panicked texted and this is what I came up with Diplomatic he wrote this you guys your guys dynamic is hilarious

Yeah, you're your you are guys dynamic. What the fuck is a dynamic? You know they're dynamic man The dynamic I don't think that's so big of a word Okay, well Nikki if you're gonna stuck on that We went past that that is a big word for Bobby for Bobby. That is a big word for Bobby, for Bobby. That's a big one. I have a learning disability. Bobby is, you throw him a curve ball word and an ad read. And honestly, you start to see steam come out of his headphones. He panics.

He panics on the read. He can read fine. I don't know what happens to. I have to act it out when I read it. I have to use my hands. Yeah, Bobby sells Steven Singer jewelry with like, if you saw it in here, it's like he's conducting a imaginary symphony.

But your guys dynamic. I'm not proud of that. That was, it was so. Isn't it guy, oh, and your guys is? He's, your guys. Use guys as much as I should have said. It should be you two. It shouldn't be guys twice. I said guys said it should be you two it shouldn't be guys twice I said guys he should have learned from my guys you two's dynamic

I'm a rocky to you toes it don't go. No you those good to see you stems over there with a you toes Who's on top who's on bottom you toes a good? Hey, we thought it you shine. Hey, you know, she's shy. She's got a big dick I Yeah, I prefer the penis with a trans woman I understand she is beautiful. Norton is Norton Yeah, and there I've never he's the happiest he's ever been in his life and she is enjoying life too I mean he's making YouTube influence videos He's pretty happy. Yeah, so what is this a podcast? in his life and she is enjoying life too. I mean, he's making YouTube influence videos.

He's pretty happy. So is this a podcast or is this a YouTube show that you're not going to know? They're making it a YouTube channel. Oh, it's everything because they're just like milking it. Well, he's milking it all right. Our energy. He's milking it all over his chest.

She's like, it's not only fans. It's not on this YouTube page. Yeah, say anything around. No, that's behind the paywall. Sorry, Dan. Sorry, Dan's gone. Probably used to do a nice cute guy on the side, making puns and doing some voices.

Vanilla, Dan. Now you got two pieces of shit making dick jokes. I apologize. Vanilla, Dan, did even it out a little bit. I apologize. No, this is better. This is more our speed the lights are bright. We're talking shit We're getting into it man. You know Nikki I mean I'm sure black loot told you when you're coming in the reason we switched the time is because we thought

The great Gerry O'Connell was gonna come in here I'm so excited for the reunion. I would have been so excited really the only reason I was so excited for the reunion. I would have been so excited. It was really the only reason I was coming. I'm doing that. Understood. That was some big news. You would have been here for what could only be a classic episode. One, once we hilarious front down the way he gaze off for your food on the Wendy Williams show, which is my favorite thing ever.

He turns into a middle-aged black woman. That's he's the, I mean that's that's genuinely him trying her broccoli crust pizza, Bobby. I know. It's one of my favorite things. And here's a problem. It gets stuck in your head. Of course. For the rest of the day, I'm gonna be on the trang. Oh, can I be honest with you guys? So when I went on the Wendy show and Jerry was subbing for Wendy and he's trying my food, two things. you know, the producers are very excited to have a man there. And at that point, I think Wendy was going through a vegan phase again, but you just never knew. And they were like, hey, we're going to make some dude food. We want to make really like meaty food, which I have like some of,

I threw all these ideas and they chose this broccoli crust pizza, which honestly is not one of my favorite recipes. I mean, he falls. It's not that great. I'm just gonna be really honest. Like, I can't believe that. I mean, by the time that was making that, but that's the equilibrium. He was making it better because when do you want him

to try your food and go, this grows. Uh huh. And you go, well, it's just raw ingredients right now. You're eating out of a bowl. I'm just trying, can you have the finished product? She's like, uh huh. Put hot sauce on it. This is it. This tastes like here. It's amazing. Want to think she's, first of all, I think he's a fantastic cook. Everything she's ever made that we've had has been phenomenal.

Wendy Williams spits something down to her fucking dish at one time. It's fucking nuts. What was it? Well, she only spitted out because she tried the wrong one and it, even though the one said Wendy on it, she tried the other one and it even though the one said Wendy on it She tried the other one and it was cold soup and she was like this is cold and she did not enjoy the cold soup I'm not a fan of cold soup like a gazpacho. Is that what it's called? I mean most hosts just would have you know not talked about it and later been like don't give me the cold soup Yeah, she went put and looked at a producer was like She was we didn't sell a lot of books that day.

But Jerry O'Connell came in, and I mean, he was everything shy of moon walking across the stage with her food in his hand. It was so rewarding. I thought really good. Of course, he did the job. You know, piece of Adam come out of the closet. Well, look at that outfit.

Geez, he's wearing a vest. Oh, dude, he looks like a vampire outfit. Geez, he's wearing a vest. Oh, dude, he looks like a vampire hunter. He really does look like a little stat. Good processor. I've got some cheese, some eggs. Do you hate watching yourself, myself? Um, no, I hate that.

You're gonna sit down on the same chair. That's fantastic. I mean, you're psychologically sound. I know, I know, I know. But she's also adorable. The Easters weird. I've never edited anything I've ever made because I changed it. Oh really?

Oh I actually think it's like a learning opportunity. I like to know what I'm doing. Oh I just lie and give Christine notes like they're my own. I can't watch anything I've ever done. I can't stand it. Wow. Oh wait a second, he's shoe camming her. And this is my only, so I was on the Wendy Williams show even though you guys think she

hated my food. She really did love it. She just didn't always express it in the way. I feel like she didn't like you. No, she hated my food. She hated my food. She hated my food. No, white hair.

She's just something, she is one of the keep you in your place, man. It was bizarre. I think she just really checked out, because she was like, Nikki's got this, you know, and her checking out just wasn't as the enthusiasm as Gerry O'Connell.

I love your outlook. Are you so positive? What's his piece is? It takes like toilet paper. Well, she's just checking out. You know what I mean? She needs a moment. One moment when Wendy said, I don't like to eat too much of this.

I'm taking my niece out to a real restaurant after this. No, she didn't say that. She didn't say that. She was gonna... She goes, oh yes, she goes out. She goes, I don't need this. We're going out to a nice restaurant after this. Wow.

After I ate this pixie bit shit, I'm gonna get some food. I do know for a fact she took home my meals at least three times. Took them home? She had them packing. She fed them the pickles in her front yard. Yeah. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha She had them packing the pickles in her front yard. She opened her limo window and threw it all the way to the front of the studio. Eat these carrot cupcakes, motherfucker.

I actually kill anybody who comes in. In preparation for this show because I really am a true performer. I prep for things. I was curious what I had served Jerry and what had gotten these classic reactions. So I actually did go back and they pulled all the Wendy clips. They used to be everywhere, but when the show was canceled, they pulled everything. So the only clip I could actually find was the bonfire clip of you guys talking about this segment, which then I did get some really wonderful moments of the things you guys had to say about all sorts of things. We contacted you for the very first time,

and I said, Lou get a hold of her because we have to save her from this. She's so lovely and nice, and the food looks, and one of you Williams was just, we were blown away by it. I'm like, who treats their guests like this on a show? What so bizarre? Excuse me, try me try that.

Ugh. Well, the best is I had two people on the side because you guys do have quite a few fans say, hey, just so you know these guys are talking about you. And, but they definitely said it very cautiously. Like, you know, I don't know what you think. And I was like, and even watching this, like, there's some funny ass shit you guys say about me.

I mean, it's definitely like, I don't know if my husband wants to hear. We weren't shitting on you at all. No, no, it was good stuff, but it's just like, you know, like I think I'm pregnant here, and there was something about me being pregnant, and you're like,

fucking, dinky's husband, no, no, it was just funny shit. But that sounds like it. That sounds like me being pregnant. Yeah, yeah. It was a hundred times. Whatever comes after that that she's forgetting was me I'm sure I take your fans I take no offense. I think it was funny shit when I first listened to you guys

I was funny shit. You came on very quickly after we got a hold of you. We talked on the phone. What does your husband do? He's in finance. Oh really? Yeah, he's a big guy It does help Jacob Um, I mean he's six foot tall. He's muscular and not a big guy, but like, you know, you're married to a man Yeah, he's a man. Nice. You know, I know what I'm doing So it's turning the jacuzzi Okay, give me some more O'Connell So why do you cancel? You heard you weren't bringing savory only sweet. I mean it tastes like pizza, but it's just

My mind is blown right now. Excuse me. I'm He can't believe it's even been accomplished. He says it tastes like pizza and Nothing I think so, it's mine. He can't believe it's even been accomplished. He says it tastes like pizza and nothing. I couldn't come up with another word. He couldn't come up with another word. I think the word is broccoli. They have cars that drive themselves and make turns. It tastes like pizza and I got nothing else. So it's energy.

That's all the same. Exactly what it is. Because it's the convulsions that really get me that these viewers might not be able to see. But it's the voice, but it's really the fact that he's shaking a lot during the segment. You're almost like Jerry Jerry Pull it together man. There's another dish. Why is this color? I don't know if I can handle it. Is he dancing after this segment? He just let the stylist do is he dances in so please bring up a thing of Jerry O'Connell dancing and that he comes out and does it do he does the show

He's very good. When she leaves, he goes, I'm playing the role of Wendy Williams today. He just inherently is a much nicer person. He shoe cam, do you say it, right? That was a... And I had always wanted to be shoe cam. Every time I went on the show, I secretly looked at Wendy and looked down at my shoes to give her a little signal and she never did it.

Wow. Did Gerry make you realize that you were in a abusive relationship? I was that he was so nice. He was even, you know, like in the makeup chair next to me and genuinely really nice. Is rubbing your shoulders? It's rubbing my shoulders. I think it's not flirting at all. It was, it was an experience.

I do remember though doing the actual segment and thinking like the energy was so over the top like he couldn't really like He's like someone making too much noise and bad you're like alright settle down I'll just come in He didn't have an outfit change didn't Dude Whatever you need O'Connell is in Tell you what this is you know what O'Connell is in good. Tell you what this is.

You know what this is? This is midlife food. I need this gig. Buddy. I hope this lady drops and I get this gig. I like Jerro Conelson's stand by me. Stuck with him through a little show called My Secret Identity. Then was with him all through the movies.

And then I kind of lost touch. And I will say, I don't know when he comes out to do all these show they hired him full time to be on one of them the talk It's one of them where it's like four black women in him Yeah, he just sits down dishes with him. He likes to hold the cards and be like fan himself. Oh Topic that show is his destiny. He wanted this gig The daytime TV having one of these for the rest of your life. Oh yeah. You're sad.

You get to live in the front of you. You were living in New York, LA. You get a limo guy. Oh my god, you have to worry about shit. You have to worry about auditions. You don't have to, you could probably, you're gonna have like food sent to your house. Everything's gonna be perfect for you.

You get, oh, what a life. But Wendy Williams can be replaced by a white, fake actor. He tried, though. He tried. You know what I'll say, though, is that sometimes because it's energy is so high, you're not always sure how genuine it is,

but I was really surprised that behind the scenes, he genuinely was very excited about all the gossip. He wanted to talk about all the real housewives. He, I mean, true. It seemed like a passion of his Reality TV show and gossip. Let me taste them. I get it. I think it's all fake. I'd love to do that Also, I Spake he was playing the game right you know, I have a picture of when he was up in my house

One of the only pictures it is of no one related to me. No ceiling. No, it's in my bedroom Oh, you gave me that picture That's correct. Oh, it's in my bedroom. I can't see it. Oh, you gave me that picture. That's correct. Oh, it's good to know. I know. Your ears is coming. No, I don't think one.

Bobby doesn't share the respect I have. If he gave me one, I remember it was you that gave it to me. And she was a bit of a tear. I wouldn't talk about like you weren't there. This is really soft. I'm going to say, I appreciate that. It's a good smile, yeah. No, you got a beautiful smile too.

What's happening? I am freaking out. Actually, yeah. No, you got a beautiful smile too. What's happening? I am freaking out. Actually, I was thinking you do have a nice smile, but so I know, I don't even remember why I brought you a picture of Wendy. I had something behind it. Well, it's got. I'm glad that it's become a part of your life.

It's a part of my life because how much I would love to do that exact job, to talk, how much people hate on this show when I come in and only talk about my shows I watch. But like, I would love to do that exact job to talk how much people hate on this show when I come in and only talk about my shows. I watch it. I would love to have the freedom she had to just go up there and do it and everyone. I would watch the show. I don't know anything about the housewives shows that I've never watched one episode,

but a couple of the topics we're going to be about them. I don't care because shows be like, I don't know. I think he's ugly. And like she just says it and you're like, damn, this show is the best. I just didn't like when she did it to the poor Nicky, walked out and she was like, hey, Queen, I made you all this delicious food. And she's like, put hot sauce on it.

It's like, but it's my great-grandmother's recipe when she escaped the Holocaust. And she's like, put hot sauce on it. Yeah. Yeah. Did you not like when Jerry was on because you wanted the abuse some weird Hot now Jerry bite me. Yeah, excuse me. I think Jerry's faking it. You know Michael Jackson was faking his voice

I know they're saying that now you there's actually audio voice Is it that like it's not like that? It's not it's not hey, baby. How are you little boy? It's not like that. It's a little I want to come to my neverland you can tell he still had a little freaky voice for sure Dude, the whole thing was a fake and I think Jerry O'Connor talks gangster when he's off here we go You want to see one do I'm just be super mean to Nicky? I bet Jerry O'Connor in his house comes home and goes, yo, what's up, bitch? That fucking Nicki, man, holy shit.

That piece of it was good, but her fucking, hmm, God damn. I ain't going out there for a minute. Sorry, no, it's okay. What are we talking about? Jerry O'Connor, he's into me, what? What is he? I don't know. No, no, no, no, I think he likes guys.

I, he, no, he's married to Rebecca Romaine Stings. I know, I mean. He just dances around like he likes guys. I, um, he, no, he's married to her back of her main stage. I know. I mean, um, he just dances around like he likes guys. Uh, Wendy Williams face, when I go back to that, look how big her head is next to your head. Yeah, look at her. For sure. Um, go back to the other thing, though, uh, with Wendy, her face, it already looks like she's telling you you have to win her. Look at her. She's not smiling at you. She's like, she's like, go ahead. What is this next bullshit? She's chewing your food like she found gum on the stream. The chewing is a reserved kind of chewing. It's like she's trying to figure out what's in there. And then Nikki starts, Nikki starts panic cooking. But this, I don't think, this

might be the one. Oh my gosh, this is the one. So this was an interesting phase where she was vegan sometimes not vegan other times and I was making this thing because the producer said she's definitely not vegan now and it's got sausage in there and she goes to me and that's why she's chewing it where she picks it up and she goes oh no but mine doesn't have sausage. If she goes she's spitting it into the napkin. It is now the napkin She spit it out on TV show it in this clip. They showed it You can't be if you're on to get off again vegan If you're on again off again vegan it doesn't matter Swallow fucking thing you're on TV you psycho. That's insane

And she like all the mind doesn't have sausage in it and I was all I thought was oh You know you know you said you could have You're a dead pig snouted actually A face and an eye I'll be honest this was this was a rougher one and I do think that she took a little bit of a break after this Better an animal. No, you did nothing wrong. She fed her a fucking animal It's a television. She said when she was making This is this is other error somewhere else. That's like giving you a vegetable. Let me tell you something There's no meat and go back to the beginning of this

She she starts right away Bobby. She starts with the mac and cheese. There's nothing meat in the mac and cheese She starts in on that okay, isn't that meat in the mac and cheese. There's nothing meat in the mac and cheese. She starts in on that. Okay. Isn't that meeting the mac and cheese? There's there's not there's not that is a that is a sweet potato cauliflower mac and cheese It is delicious wow. That's how piss she is at you Those guys were fighting during the break and she goes bitch, let's get through this But I'm done with you. She just turned her ring around to fucking scar your face We wanted to do a wellness check on you after this one. We're worried about you.

Turn it up. Shell shot. Here we go. What is that? What is this? What is that? What is that shit? And then a mushroom and beef slapping.

And that one getting excited. What the fuck? But I'm going to start over here. She says. Basically, I'm just adding to some onions and garlic. Show her gonna make it she starts cranking hot sauce on the already made shit It's big hello there we go. We're gonna get there you are so amazing You're amazing keeping positivity in that holy shit hell room. You're in right now look at her She's my only in the picture behind you. You've never gotten that Wendy in the picture.

What a crow. She literally just did a shot of hot sauce to get your food out of her mouth. Look at her, she's cranking it on. Okay. This one, and by the way, Nikki looks over while she's cranking the hot sauce on, go back. While she's doing it, Nikki looks over,

she goes like, great, great. Yeah, why don't you load hot sauce on it and get rid of all the flavor I've been doing. I mean, she's putting more on. Here she goes, but when she he looks over she goes like great great. Yeah, why don't you load hot sauce on it and get rid of all the flavor I'm just putting more here she goes when she looks over she's She looks down and looks away like For like a while in this point Right many years. I mean I was probably on the Wendy Williams show for five years did at least 15 episodes So this is probably

midway. I'm telling you this. I'd pay a million dollars to hear the producers meeting when they're having dinky back on. And she goes, and she goes, this bitch again, why it goes Wendy, we got an empty segment here. She brings in the carrot cupcakes. Everyone's happy. She goes, I don't like it. It's gross. And then one person goes, ah, but she's nice. She's cute And then she's gonna cute and then she just hated her guts from then on for sure because she doesn't smile The only time she smiles is when she laughs at the fact that she spills your food out into a napkin Nikki's so nervous. She just spilled all the big and bits You're shaking

You're shaking. Nikki, she didn't like you. Oh my God. But she did have a choice in having me on, and she did keep having me on. I will say that a couple times, she also kind of last minute, like a couple days before, she would talk about me,

like during the other segments. Like you, I'm telling you positive things, like oh man, that food yesterday that Nikki had was so great. And I brought it home and it was great I swear to God she has a smile one This is not her best. I haven't seen her crack a smile or bring her eyes up from the fucking weird We had Christine witchcraft turned to show ending disease. So it seems of work. You're welcome Um, you're welcome. I think she just I think if she was having a bad day during my segments, she just didn't

think it, you know, like it's kind of like when like a kick comes home and they are, they're worst around their parents because it can be the real selves, you know. She was also on and off severely heavy drugs for a while. That was also in and out. Were you there? You weren't there when she passed out in the, uh, yeah, her food. She took a bite of her vegan hamburger yeah before she went out she was wearing the stature liberty every see

that when she falls that's gonna be it but she goes she goes ninky dicky bitch what did you put my cake? that would be good the art for the bitch bitch gave me a beat cake yes

i feel weasier what the fuck was in that beat cake? was that real sausage Yeah me too I missed the show so much I had the same exact kind of pass out I can't laugh at this Did you see the guy stop positions? This guy was in front of he did a video. I love the internet He stuck his fingers in his balls and then wiped it under a nose and Did she pass this out?

That's right. Yeah, that's okay. I'm so good Oh, here it is she went down And they went nicky quick quick. Whip up a, whip up a soup. Nicky, Nicky get a case of D already. Nicky get out there. We need you to vamp. We need a mushroom case of D a quick. The huge how you boo in behind her.

Ah, that's the funniest. How you boo in is what says, you stay in behind her. How you boo in. I love though, she was holding on for the last second and then she everything just let go and she was out of frame It's just like I mean I got I got a fuck Dude I could watch compilations of people feigning on TV a lot. It's fantastic. You guys ever feinted I went down remember the comic girl that faded. Yeah, the one with the big Yeah, she went yeah, but I did a but I was sitting thank God you fainted Remember the comic girl that Fade did? Yeah. The one with the big tins. Heather, McDonald, I think it was.

She went down, yeah, but I did, but I was sitting, thank God. You Fade it? I was in report it. I was in report it. I stood the dabs, too many dabs, without breathing in between. And you see, it's kind of scary.

It is scary. But I watched it. But here's the thing, I didn't breathe, I didn't breathe oxygen in there. Yeah. And I took more. I'm trying not to cough out loud. It's scary for Christine. She doesn't have the password. And then you just seem to go and, I'm just going down. I'm Wendy oxygen in there. Yeah. And I took more. I'm trying not to cough out loud. It's scary for Christine.

She doesn't have the password. And then you just seem to go and I'm just going down. I'm Wendy Williams in it. Oh, good. Oh, no, you okay? Oh, no, it's terrible. Oh, no, guys, this isn't funny. What?

Puffer and I got. But look at Lewis. He's like, I got content. I get, oh my God, I got views. Lewis really was hilarious. He was like, he said somebody, he's like, he's like, dude content. I got I got views Lewis really was hilarious He was like he said somebody's like dude because I have too much riding on you The knockout game people doing their younger like you hold your breath and it's just what was had I didn't have any off-camera you don't think everybody in this room would feel the same way if you did that on this show No, no, no, no, no, no

No, they're a meal ticket walked out months ago. Yeah, I know. Sorry guys Oh, yeah, why don't we do it reads why don't we look at look who's being a producer? Love it using the microphone and evidence that a hand gesture is terms and conditions apply. Dude, this is my guess is on Nikki Dinky. These are guesses. Yeah. What's up?

What's happening? Wild child, maybe in her young years, wild child. And as a person who wasn't, but I still color my hair and all that stuff. Yeah. I'm substantially older than Nikki, but Nikki has the pink hair, the corset, the sexy leather pants. But I just watched her show that she is a mom through and through. She looked over your shoulder the entire reading and was like, and I mean this. Rooting for you you like a teacher or

no mom I'm talking and when you were hitting things she would she would not she'd go what she look up and she look up at you and she'd be like you're still doing good I have nervous because they kept missing the aura picture digital frame you kept missing the word and I thought your sponsors might get mad thanks for bringing that Thanks for bringing it up Or a picture digital frame You've got to work with what you got Jake

Listen dude come on it's live man. That's the fire of a live read. He does give it though great I mean, so I don't know if you guys know this, but I actually did voiceovers for like 10 plus years. It was, um, I don't use the word voices. But I agree that when you're doing something, you know, and you have only your voice to use, you got to give it your body. Yeah. And the way that you really, I mean, you literally disculped did a fire when you said the word bonfire. And I was, I felt it through your voice. Did you feel the fire?

I sure did. I actually did the bonfire, but from the top flame down to the bottom where the wood is. Yeah, Nikki can make you leave your whole family. I would dump Dawn. You love you have all face time right now. I'll give her the finger And I'll tell Max you all so good at themselves. She goes you actually do have have a really good smile. I'll walk away from everything. I'll walk away from it all. I'll call Max and go, hey, listen, kid. You'll get it one day.

Join the No Dad Club. See you later. Hey, good news. You're going to be funny. Yeah. Hey, there's an electric bike in the shed. Oh, grab it. Merry Christmas, bitch.

What's up, Nick? Sad to my son. I've never sat so close to you before, and I did. I looked up ones, because I can't, I can only look at you so much, because you're a little too close to me, and I'm looking more at Big J over here. Yeah, of course.

And I looked over to my right, and you had this like very soft smile on, and I was like, he's got a great smile. Because I thank you so much. You have a, you're, you're, you're, you're adorable. For goodness' wow, he's getting flustered. I, uh, well, I never saw it before before let's forget about that smile for a second and talk about that flawless skin me It's great you yes. Oh me. I think you have flawless skin too. I have I have I'm how old do you think I am? Oh

How old are you? Okay, um you are 47 53 You are, you are 47. 53. 53. He does have good skin now, yeah. That was good. I could have gone younger, but I just knew that, you know, so much for sure he's from

wisdom. Thank you so much. You know, you know, you need a little rain in that, little sun to make a rainbow. My guess is, the ono wheel squeaks the loudest, anything else you need. My guess is you assumed over 50, and you were going to say something late 40s But you didn't want to go too late because then it sounds like you think he'll know you think over 50 So you said of 40s Deep enough that it was late 40s, but not deep enough that you thought he was over 50 even though

Okay, the reason you made all those decisions is because you're over 50. I don't need you to turn out wrong Captain honesty All right, so put your cape away, fuck fest. All right, let me just get a couple of things. Apologies. Sounds like he's a little jealous. I mean, he's trying to bring me down. He sent me up with that. You got great skin.

And then you come and, and then he's like, sounds like. He planned this on the train ride over. It's damn. I was looking at Don's head today. What? We just talked and I saw her head turn color. Like her chest and her neck and then her face went red.

Okay. Blotch. And I went, are you getting, like I saw it for the first time. It just went red, chest went red, neck and then her head. And we're in the middle of a conversation and she was just listening and I went,

did you just get a heat flash? She goes, yes, I did. Did you see it? I went, yes. And I was like, how does that feel? She goes, well, there's a pain that comes up my spine, a hot flash. She comes up my spine into my neck and then into my head really hot. And then my lips, they start to get tingling and then a rage builds in my stomach and I want to smash something. And I just went, I'll see you later. And I left the house. I swear to God, I left.

That's the last word I said to Don, I left the fuck out of it. She was, I'm going to destroy something in my path. What the fuck is that? Well that was, that's pretty heavy and she didn't try to stop you when you left It was almost like she gave you that was her final line to you. No, she's like good. I'm glad you got it Yeah, that's what I mean. Yeah, you walked off and she wasn't like where you going? Where you going like you walked off and she was like that's fine. I'm fine with that being my last words. Yeah Unfuckin believable, so I'll dump her right now Try that cake.

No, apparently all of my family goes into early menopause. Like, my family over Thanksgiving kept telling me that over an organ. You're gonna get menopause early? Yeah. You're young though, you're like 30, right? 35? Yeah.

What's up? Totally, no, not 30. How old do you think I am? You'll be 35. Okay, big day. You make sure that you go up and then down again, but up again, so don't feel bad about what you going down again. You're in a man you're around 35 33 35 I can't say mine you can't say mine you can't say mine you have to have your own guess 34

I turn 40 All right, I have the prices All back to contribute I say 31 I turn 40 Wow, you look great. Good for you. You know what? I get away from all this and I feel wrinkly now. What did you lose? I lost 10 pounds Really? I gotta say I lost you Yeah, Bobby lost the full Nikki dinky So you feel much older after you lost a Nikki dinky? How I'm a I don't you have to tell me I know what I'm not trying to be rude at you feel much older after you lost in Mickey Dinky? I don't know.

You don't have to tell me. I know what I'm not trying to be rude at all. But how much do you weigh? It's like 125. I literally lost her in weight. That makes me. Yeah. Bobby's ex has fat though is a celebrity super chef.

So watch out. So watch your ex. Oh wow. Okay. I have to say that. I mean, wow is it rough word? Do you know when you look at old pictures of me? No, wow works, holy shit.

What the fuck? Wow, when you're looking at somebody peal down an Israeli kidnapping poster, maybe wow. I mean, not. Well, I mean, I'm rough. That's not him. That's not him. That's not him.

That's not him. No, no, no, the rest of the mark, that one's not. That is me, Jay. No, it's not. The one on the left. No, that is. one's not that is me Jay No, that is that's not a bad picture. That's opening a shirt terrible picture. No, no, no stop. Oh, Bob You don't want to find the bad news because you're doing this because Christy's going oh my god Look how terrible is worth those are nowhere near the terrible I don't like how fast Christine was on Google on that one. Yeah, really

I don't like how fast Christine was on Google on that one. Yeah, really she's been sitting over there quiet I can do this one That's hilarious Christine's getting jealous of all the attention that he's getting around she goes look these guys The study look really There was a picture of you it just wrote on top of you morbidly obese written over the the picture of you Yeah, yeah, thanks for making me remember it on the show. I literally wrote it. Yeah, thanks, dude.

Oh, it was a freeze. Yeah, it was a freeze. But you look great now. That was my special. But I mean, like, I donated the jacket. I did the top baseball card thing. And they're like, do you have, I go, do you have a, we need a two, a piece of clothing

we'll put in the card. Card up this jacket. I go, how have we need a two a piece of clothing? We'll put it in the card Carve up this jacket. I go how many car you're gonna make seven million Game the gloves that's hilarious. Oh fucking jacket of 4x 4x fucking leather jacket Mother fuck that's a lot of tops cards. I had outside covering a bicycle God damn you lost all the weight you look fantastic. How many kids how many kids do I have three kids twins? God you have twins Anna wow. Yeah, I know all born anally. Yes Anus that's why you look so good. I don't know why I laugh at that. It's just stupid. Why would I come on? That's the funny part. That is like that is like reverting back to like 15 year old,

like comedy humor, like, oh, talk about hate. You heard the new camera, but. You came out of her butt. None of us do impressions, Nicky, so we have to revert to scatological humor. It is a lot of time to fill. But like, you lost 120 pounds ish. I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, yeah.

I like, yeah, I like, yeah, I like, yeah, yeah. I like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, enough only to think you. Did you feel like, you know, because then you don't have as much fat plumping out your fine lines or not so fine lines. Are you saying that I am? You got, did you get older? Did you look older?

Are you saying that I have good skin because my fat was stretching it out? No, no, no, because when you lose the fat, then your wrinkles get deeper. So I was, I'll be honest with you. I was very, one of the reasons I got the surgery, one of the reasons I didn't wanna get it is because I was worried that I was gonna have

all that saggy, crazy skin because that's a whole other operation that people get. I knew people that had gotten that and that operation sucks. That one's like, you're really in pain, you got bags dripping shit from it's disgusting And I feel bad that some people have to get that but thank God that's genetic Oh, so I didn't I don't really have droopy saggy skin and

My face didn't go it didn't get that I mean perfect skin. It's not it's good skin But it could have been way worse. Yeah, great skin, but it could have been way worse. He's Hitler's great great great grandson It could have been way worse, but I'm just lucky. Thank God. I have yeah I'm it's obvious Yeah, thank you look great, too. What's happening? Oh, man, what is Fuck cake We I do have his cake here. Yeah, you have a cake every now and then the frosting the smell of it kind of wafes over here Now when you cook with the, because I went to,

would Max come over on the weekends? No, no, I don't know. I don't know if I'm up for more kids. Can I just say something? You just cut it off. You got to walk away from it completely. Yeah, it's like, Max is going to do something inappropriate to step mom Nikki.

He's going to do something weird. She's going to be like, Hey, Bobby, we got to talk. Max has been looking through the door when I'm getting changed. Yeah, I don't like that. Yeah, he does rule. You don't saw something like that off Bobby, we gotta talk. Max has been looking through the door when I'm getting changed. Yeah, I don't like that. Yeah, he does rule. You don't saw something like it off, you cut it off.

You understand? I know, you're right. You're right, better just make a clean cut. Yeah, he'll find something. And let him get used to it. He'll probably get good at music. He'll get great at music. Yeah, I have a lot to draw from.

Oh my God, his poetry is gonna be soul-crushing. Don can meet a plumber or dream. There you go, dude. Take it back to Boston. Some craftsman get a three-decker and some of them ripped out the first two. How long have you and Don been married? Oh, maybe it is time for the same.

Oh, dude. Wow. What a soul, what a crushing answer. What a great, guess how long has it been that you two happy kids have been together? She went from great smile, look great. You look 35. How long have you been married to that hot headed woman?

We've been married for 16 years. 16 years. I've known her for 30. Oh, it's long time. Yeah, I knew when she was just a chubby little polo. I knew when she had bangs. Yeah, I dumped her when we first met her too. Because of the bangs. No, because there's other hot 19 year old that wanted to fuck me.

Were you together those full 30 years? No, we broke up. I was kind of in my prime. You know, I was like, and she's, she's always been the same. She's always been this beautiful, cute girl. Well, can we also show Nikki real quick. Can you show young hot bob? The bob that I met is sexy. Young sexy. Before we grew a little. Oh, yeah. So there was there was your prime. There was was some. Oh, Bobby was a problem. Yeah, that Bobby you'd be. He's looking up and down. Did you see that? Yeah, I did. And because I'll tell you what, he's summoning hot bobby right now. He's giving you what hot bob. Did you see that yeah? I did and cuz I say what he's summoning hot Bobby right now You would hop on what it does that's where that's where this inner confidence comes from

This is hot that's how buddy. Oh see that's not even that's not even hop-op that well, that's me. Yeah, that's me No, that's hot that's no that's no that's hot Bob. It's hot Bob. No, the one to the left That's my Marlon Brando hot-pop what what show is that from that's a movie called last night at it He's on YouTube. You can watch it, I was a romantic lead. I'd say it almost looks familiar. Yeah, I worked at a pizza shop. Nice.

Wait, go all the way to the right. There's my, that's the sexy Bobby. I remember. That is, yes, cute. Is that you? That's me. It's sad that she's looking at my face, going, is that you? Is that possible?

Like, like fx? For like like it was no it's like black and white. It's hard to judge. Like Sam Winston school. Young's mom actually making my face. You have a beret on. Can you get that was my thing backwards beret? That's cool. Oh look at yeah look at that. That's that's that's high school. That's my that's cool. Oh, look at that. Look at that. That's that's a that's high school. That's my that's your missing poster. That's that's American Indian Bob. Hello. Welcome to Maul's in high school. I have a look at what I have on I have Go back to her. Wait, so is that your prime? Where's the... My table.

No. I mean, that was pretty good, but there's Dawn right there. I like to be pulled up a picture of you like taking a fart. No, that's one of your hot pictures. That's why I used to fuck the stool. Oh, okay, I've got you. All right, we should probably take it.

All right, don't bring Dawn up, you friggin' No, don't bring her up. No, she looks hot, let me see. He has to forget about her. I'm sorry, sorry. Cause she's old, listen. Is that how it works? Thank goodness.

She's really saying that to be cool to other girls. We have to take a break. Why don't we have this cake? And we'll come back with it. When we come back, we're gonna take a break. Can you hang out with us, Nikki? Yeah, no, I'm here. You can't call anywhere.

I'm chained to the chair, actually. She's got a new podcast. You're so creative. Available wherever you listen to podcasts or cookbook. More veggies please is at niki dinky cooking dot com. Use promo code crackle crackle and you gave yourself a little deal and make sure guys do us a favor. Keith Robinson. He's taping his new special for Netflix Tuesday, December 19th. That's this Tuesday. There's a 7-9-30 show at Sony Hall in New York. Please go to SonyHall.com. We need you guys.

We want you to go, but you really need to support the show. Just go fill it up. Support it. Clear your schedule and go. He's a legend of New York. He's a real mentor to all of us, and he needs to fill this up. This is special, and we want you to do this. We need you to support it. Spread the word, retweet it, share it, get the word out there because we need to fill this up

for him. Two shows, seven and nine thirty, and we'll be back. It's the bonfire. Hey everybody, thanks for listening. That was just a portion of our actual serious XM Bonfire! and you're you. Grrrr.