The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Mom Mom's Meatballs

Episode Date: August 25, 2022

Jay brings his Mom Mom's recipe of Sweet & Sour Meatballs & Cottage Cheese Noodles after cooking it up himself the night before. The gang goes over a couple of stand out performances from America's Got Talent.Stream "The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson & Dan Soder" for 3 months free on the SiruisXM app! Offer Details Apply: www.SiriusXM.com/BonfireFollow us on all social media @TheBonfireXM@DanSoder www.DanSoder.com@BigJayOakerson www.BigJayOakerson.com

And now the bonfire with big Jay Okerson and dance odor He loves it He or does this sound like the original recording He means like not very good Yeah, it does sound a little dirty, but also it can only clean up old rock so much All right, there. Do you look at them? Oh, yellow. Oh, scus dude.

Jeff Lennon looks like he smelled like shit. He had that puff out here, that white afro with the dark glasses, Jeff. Yeah. That's a lot of pubic hair in that band. He's crust, dude. Jeff Lennon is crust. Yeah. But for a shining moment, I don't know.

That guy, the tinted glasses guy is guys, getting pussy always blew my mind. Tinted glasses, you always leave a fucking, sharky shithead. Yeah, poker game every time. Yeah. Tinted. Not sunglasses. Tinted glasses. Like, tantin. My mom would rock them for a minute.

Some tints... Not the ones that change when you go outside right my mom rocks those now Just like some glasses that were like mom is an old lady rocks those Tantin Oh, that's a big 80s thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah a lot of pictures of people in Tantin It's like us is smoking inside. Oh, it's 80s all right, and I believe this is this song the 80s this point was just 70s Probably say you could be a dude just a regular looking dude You know fucking oh, yeah, you could look like you were 40 when you're 22 Why not why are you 21 years old and already wearing a vest with a button down shirt tucked in the jeans?

Yeah, man Mustaches were coming out at like 17 then a teenager wanting to get cowboy boots. Oh look at this This is a good day. Look black Lou our black king the black tiger Lewis And a Florida data Jacob a top Jacob. Did you guys miss a good day man? You miss a good day to be in studio because I'll say what I did The other day I got a little cooking bug. We were talking about cooking on the show. I said, you know what?

First time in my life, let me take a run at mom mom's sweet and sour meatballs. Rest in peace, mom mom. Rest in peace, mom mom. Rest in power. And noodles and cottage cheese. My favorite comfort meal at mom mom's house when I was younger.

This was your childhood comfort meal. This was my childhood comfort meal. This was my childhood comfort meal. I hope you guys enjoyed. Don't think about it yet. I'm so excited. I've already been plated by Christine. I'm gonna tell you right now, coming in against loose tuna casserole.

I'm already noticing there's a lack of a regga know that I'm a little upset about. I'll be honest, this isn't a regga know for your recipe. What? But I will say this. What? I'd like you to about. I'll be honest, this isn't a regular free recipe. What? But I will say this. What? I'd like you to also, if you guys could, I don't know if you've ever watched Man vs. Food a lot.

And what I hate that it gets done, and now that I've made the food, why I want it, is it too cold? Yes. OK, then we need to get those in the microwave. Yeah, it's cold. Yeah, it's cold. Don't touch it.

Put it down. OK. This is going to wait now. Dan, it's cold. Yeah, it's cold. Don't touch it. Put it down. Okay. This is going to wait now. Dan, Dan, stop. Okay. Stop. All right.

Christine, when you get a moment, please, if you can go throw those in the microwave, I don't know why I trusted this to Lou. It was a moronic idea from the get go. Wait, he was the one that warmed this up. Yeah, that was a fool. I only had three and a half minutes. I only had three and a half minutes. Sabotour. You're a sabotour.

You knew that this was gonna beat your tuna cast role. I was short-handed today. Christine, bring the extra juice too. In case you have to re-joge it. You said, Lewin, his head said the balls of J to bring in a dish without a regga-no. Yeah, he didn't like that there was no regga-no in it. I knew that would not be.

I'd say, I'd like you to, I mean, if you ever look at Man vs. Food, when he does that same thing that I believe Guy Fieri does, I'm not that familiar with Guy Fieri, weirdly enough, as people say, I look like Guy Fieri. Yes, people, that's what I want to say. I don't look like. Why just like the Man vs. Food Show, though?

Yeah. I'm a Gordon Ramsay guy. But when he does the thing, when he rips into it, like the burger or the fucking whatever The hell it is the way describes like the flavors this hits me here He goes to texture of the meat perfects. I would say what I like to say is I think the meatballs themselves I Mean forget the sauce that's gonna knock you're dick in the dirt sure

I'm saying the texture and the the meatballs themselves are really good Thank you mom-mom. I'm smiling down upon me. I know you very well You give me what I often know that I was gonna grab my ass a slow cooker and need some reasons to use it Yeah, Rishi like was she like your Obi-Wan and when you were cooking it She was just like a hologram in the kitchen and she was like, that's it. The force is powerful with Jason. Yes, absolutely. It goes the tastes.

Well, she gave the recipe to Carla a long time ago. So Carla gave me a little walk through to it. When Carla did Carla make him for you ever? Yes. At first. Did you do it well? She ultimately had to succumb to the idea that stopped fucking with my grandmother's recipe. Because the first time she threw these things together,

she goes, I try, I mean, you did the old, like, it's good. And Carla can cook, her ass off. Yeah, so you've had her cooking many times. Yeah, it's great. She can cook, but I was like, it's good. It's just not the same. Well, one, I thought I was gonna chip a tooth on these meatballs. Why, Dan?

Cause she used chicken. She made chicken meatballs that were just so stiff. And I gotta tell you this, don't, I'd rather have whatever the plant-based substitution is for half the meats, than putting chicken into it. Why, just tell me. If he works for some reason, chicken doesn't do chicken sausage sausage sucks ass. It's the texture is so fucking gross. You like it, Black Lou? What? Yes, I do. Adels chicken sausage. They sometimes have like a little chicken sausage

with cheese, the cheese kind of melts out of it when you cook it. I've never heard of this. Might have to, might have to try to change your mind. I'd give that a whirl, but chicken meatballs, I would tell you what they were, they were projectiles is what they were. Those things could have, Little pucks. They could have went through a fucking, they could have went through a goddamn piece of glass. These meatballs I'm telling you? Melt in your mouth.

They're gonna melt in your mouth. How many, and this is your first attempt at this recipe? Myself, yes. Yourself, were you nervous that you weren't gonna get it? Right? I thought, did you have to taste the first meatball alone? I thought. Privately?

Mama makes this food so, so good. You wrote a song about it. Could it be this simple? Was my question first. Could it really be this easy? Sometimes the simplest things are the most difficult. You're not wrong. Old proverbs says. I don't know if that's what it says.

I don't think it says that. Maybe the most easy things are the most rewarding. I don't know. Jacob, are you sad you're not here for this? Question for Jake. I would like to try your cooking. What is the secret glopping it? Yeah, good point, Jacob.

When it bring up the globs. Hey, Jacob, I gonna tell you something. There's a glob. Can we find out what's called? Is it a family secret? Or can you tell us what the glob is? An old, I'll tell you what the glob is. Actually, why don't the boys get a taste first?

Maybe they can tell me what the glob is. I feel like DJ loseuz, like a glove, truffle pig. He's gonna be able to sniff it out. He might be able to know the glove just by, by the way, he did. That's good glove. I know when he got that glove.

You already get a smell test, by the way, which I was a little insulted by it. I don't know how I felt about it. He picked it up and gave it a good, like, and then touched it with his finger. As you know, I'm dewy cocks, so I can't smell yeah but but I'll use this old DJ who doesn't want this to be good because of casserole

success see that it was cold I touched on my finger I didn't smell it it looks a little brown and I'll tell you of its dry or not and if you used it dude that's not brown damn do you know it that's the salt that's the sauce getting in we are living a fantasy that Lou had in the shower always getting ready to tell you to fuck off about your cooking No way where he's going and then you're gonna bring us in and I'm gonna be like that's fucking dry and brown You suck ass hole my casserole rules Regga know rules Regga know life. What do you mean brown Lou? You don't what do you eat a gray steak? Don't you want it?

Brown and cross the I don't would read the sauce looks a little brown instead of right outside of the street in sour meatballs though oh I didn't know that their mom I'm sweet and sour meatballs yes they're not these aren't Italian meatballs okay okay good to know yeah that is why so the sauce will look a little bit different you're correct next to go off I love this dude I love being here for this tension it's Lou does not want to like it. I didn't think we were gonna have a recipe off on a Wednesday He wants to suck as much as his cats were all these like all and there's no craft singles not a one Melted over anything Mr. Fancy went to a grocery store for the ingredients. Oh you went with the lighting's different

I get it. Oh, you don't have to shoe a cat off of your ingredients You didn't blow dust off of it like it was an old treasure map. You didn't grab that canna say this company still makes beans Didn't these guys get in trouble for my boys I hope there's a big dark Christine ankle hair in there. Oh All over you Christine she is Armenian in there. Oh wow. I fell up all over you. We're going to attack on Christine. Yeah. We're going to do it with us. I know.

I know. I mean, Ian, ankle. Wow. Christine's catching shrapnel. And by the way, that was so specific. That means Lou's caught on ankle here on Christine before. Yeah, yikes. Why don't you shave your ankles? He says that he's just walking away.

At least I shaved my ankles. Holy hobbit shit. Hey, teen wolf. Man, you can bring me a glass of water That's not it. Hey Scotty I'm right over there I'm so anxious just to come back I want Lou to do the thing where you know Where somebody takes a bite and then they sink

No, no, no, where he takes a bite and he goes Hmm Yeah, there's this uncontrolled Accepted into you. I'm having a strong Filling this might be the best Melee've ever had in your life, Luke Do you think he'll eat it guarded? Don't touch it. He has to go to the corner who keeps elbow not for you. Yeah

It's not for you. Yeah, I'm excited. I got a look at those meatballs pretty close. You said you don't have a meal right? There's not like a thing you cook. No nothing. No, man. What do you feel confident with pasta? Barely barely. Yeah, I'm um do you feel confident with pasta? Barely. Barely. Yeah, I'm, um. You could pour a jar of sauce into strained spaghetti. Yeah, I could do that. It's, that's not, you could do that. Yeah, I could do that.

That's not barely. I used to make... You wouldn't do like a baked ziti, though. No. You gotta make the pasta then bake your... No. I need a fucking chicken parm, that long ago was so fun. No, dude, I suck at it.

Alright, it's probably because I can't smell. Oh, hey, Lou, you your fun. Hey, you got a Another email on your MSN account Grinders up. Oh You got a match 96 feet away if it tastes bad by the way when it comes back just no Christine's fucking up to make me look bad right now She's laughing now she's laughing. She's like, he's like,

he's just laughing. Just yanking in the loops. He's like, he's like, everybody can smell my dirty pussy. Crank and beaver hairs over there. Liquid Todd walks in. He's like,

I'm sorry to meet you interrupt. It's okay. Give me some of your balls. She goes, give some of your balls in this. And then your head. They called you fat boy slim. Who do we call them?

We call them Moby Fred. Red said Fred. Yeah, I'll look who's growing. You're growing for me. Oh, I see. Oh, I'll look at it. It's just the voice. Oh, you're grow.

Oh, here she comes. Here she comes. I gave her a stone. I gave her a stone. I gave her a stone. Get the dollar, dude. We're excited. This is an unveiling of Jay's meatballs.

I feel like you really do want this to suck, Liv. No. I know you'll be honest. I know you'll be honest. You're going to be able to. Thank you. You're taste be able to thank you. Tasteful to talk for you. Thank you so much. Tell the chef. I said thank you. You're welcome. Yeah, dog. It was more fun. Uh, Lou. Damn, this looks good, dude. If you will first,

I'd say, I need some meatball. Be some meatball first. Here we go. Make sure it's cool. Give it a little blow. I'm gonna take a whole damn thing. This is a dish from your childhood, right? Yes. All right, so this Get me in the mood Does melt does melt Sausage give me a little how you doing yeah, I, how you been? How you doing, how you been? What I like about it is the way it lingers around. Mm-hmm, you know? Like someone you want to talk to.

And it makes you crave the next piece. I'm already going there. I think I'll be treating yourself to a little bit of the noodles and cottage cheese. Don't be afraid to let the sweet and sour sauce get into the noodles and cottage cheese. Oh, I am. I'm letting them bump up. Yeah, that's part of the whole thing. I mean, what am I not? I'm a fan of the beach. It's for water. Why would I let how does she's the noodles meet sweet and sour? Yeah, I'm going for another piece of meat.

Lou? Some's not quite right. You don't mean that. There's no way you mean that. I'm not feeling it. I believe it. That's crazy. I'm not feeling it. I believe he That's crazy. I'm not the only I don't love it. They soft saw the meatballs are soft tender It's like a flavor profile. I've never tasted something Something's going on. I don't I can't figure it out. Oh, I know what is there's no ketchup Oh, God, she's noodles. I mean no craft singles involved. Mm-hmm my sincere apologies. I feel like I'm in a English

meadow. Now I'm starting to feel like dance being sarcastic. No, I'm not. Dude, this fucking rocks. They like a home cooked meal. Yeah, this is really good. Hello, which made with love, but you don't enjoy it. He made the meatballs from scratch himself. Well, he ignored the eggs. But you don't enjoy it. He made the meatballs from scratch himself. Well he ignored the eggs. No No, there's eggs in it. It's just not overbearing so it's not all hard stuck together fucking there. You could cut them with a fork Thank you There's onion in it Well, Lou when you cook, when you cook things, when you cook things, there's like pieces of onion and it, Lou, I don't just chop it on you and half and stick it into a pot and

say onions involved now, you Lou would take it. But you know, if you did, you want to hate it. Black Lou, I only said you're not here to give the, this way opinion here that this is delicious. I fucking like it. I don't like it. I love it, Jack. It's so good. It's great. It's hearty. It's like I want it to be thought cloudy outside and cold. Yep. So you get a comfortable sweatshirt on while I eat mom. I'm sweet and so are me boss and uh, how does she's noodles? I'm gonna I'm gonna demand this meal later on our friendship when I come over buddy done. Yeah, and you know what?

I'm not gonna tell Lou that we're having dinner that night Lou cuz he doesn't like it You don't understand the flavor profile because there is The juice of a certain fruit in there Can you guess what the fruit is? I'm gonna say pomegranate. No Be a barker of the right tree

A fucking fruit It's a gay man. There's a gay man carved up in there. Can we just have that as a drop? Just with Never get blue drops. I know You can't guess That watermelon is really good. Is it orange? Nope.

Is that watermelon? Nope. Oh, there's gold sweetness to it. That's the sweetest. I'm just gonna say strawberry. Nope. Hold on one more guess. I'm not there to taste it, obviously.

So this is... These cottage cheese and noodles are just the perfect side dish Not a prune isn't no not a prune so surprised everybody's guessing all this other stuff and not what it is lemon Jacob did say sour lemon no lime no Get out of the citrus dude line. Oh, so meatballs We said sweet and sour. Yes The sweet the sweet's

Well both things are sweet tomato sauce What is it? Huh, you're gonna give away the recipe. Don't do that They can't guess it what's the glove This is a glove is good to the glove the citrus and it's a fruit and it's not citrus. It is the But it is glove It's ruptid Nana it's got to be some sort of cranberry

It's got to be some sort of cranberry. Bam! Got it! Somebody with some soul. Oh, the other white people don't get the taste. You have some soul, finally. That's right, my grandma got down with the brown. And she knew about that. Get that cranberry involved, yo.

Yes, cranberries. Yeah. Wonderful. Thank you. That's the glob. I'm sorry it wasn't a gross thing of cream mushroom soup. All right, it's pretty good. Ben's growing on me.

My casserole, the glob is pure cream mushroom soup. I've never had Christine's casserole. That's my first time ever hurting about it. That's the next one we're seeing. My first time ever hearing about her casserole. No hamburger noodle, I told you. Christine's cast. That's my first time ever hurting about it. That's the next one, I'm receding. My first time ever hearing about her cast. No hamburger noodle, I told you. Oh yeah, that's just gonna be a gross gray gloomy thing like lose on a plate though.

Nobody wants a plate of barf. Mine had different color palettes. They told you, you give me a can, a can, a can, a dry. I'm okay with that. Dan, how good did you feel? I just wiped down that plate. How good did you feel though when at the end you were like, all that jaz is running around by the noodles.

I soaked them up and then I wanted some bread to get the rest of the jaz. Yeah. Oh, I meant to bring some bread. You got to bring bread for the jaz. But I'll tell you what, what a combo. That's a great childhood comfort meal. I love it except it needs a little oregano.

And oregano. And a little oregano. And a little oregano. If I gotta say something bad, it's missing oregano. And more onions. What are your can-peas of choice? Hahaha. Del Monte.

Hahaha. Um, you do a jolly green or tell me what the, who do you got? I gotta tell you something. Do you remember I showed you, the AGT, the girl, you know, everything is America! Uncertainmoniously booted the airs off the next day. Okay. Saw that coming in my way. This week's comics getting booted off was the lady who says, I think she's doing a, I think she's doing a I think she's doing a Drew Michael like her things that she's

deaf but like seems like she could hear and also I feel like no one else in her life has ever heard about this deaf thing until right now. Yeah, that's a big thing. Again, in fairness, I wasn't like tight with Drew Michael, but when he had the thing he was like, yeah, this hearing things with my whole life, I'm like, unaware of it completely. I want to know I just want to know where the polygamous is. Um, oh, not yet. They've brought him back in. In fact, I wonder if they're just going to quietly just move on from him. You think so. They made a big piece about him. They did, but they've done that for the S.Clar brothers had a nice piece about them. They just weren't on anymore. They moved on and then they just weren't on anymore. They weren't like eliminated from the show.

They were told they're moving on and the guy think they believe they got the phone call that tells you like you're not that happened with a Last comic standing stuff. Oh really? They just call you at home. They call you home big. Actually, you're not moving on so there's on TV It's still gonna say you did but it's gonna face out Damn that sucks. Yeah You think I can do that with the dude with two eyes Damn that sucks. Yeah, you're thinking I'm gonna do that with the dude with two eyes Okay, they might do that because they may have got enough thing of some people go on like like the coasts

Then ain't watching a GT Mm-hmm are like ah look at this fucking weirdo as always we're not lunatics Yeah, but the middle of this country is gonna like what the fuck is that you know, I mean? I don't I think because it's a dude with two girls I think people are probably like to watch as a gt though yeah it's like housewives watching it and shit mom pa whatever family getting and she looks at it boy's got two wives he's like well I met my partner over there yeah fucking bitch and the other ones like and my wife like hey hey I'm the dumb dumb I'm not as pumped about his comedy. I've had to hear for years though, when me and him first met,

this girl was four. Yeah. Think you groomed her. We got a problem. Yeah. She's always been sort of around. Now they're together. Is that tonight?

All together. That's last night. Tonight will be the booting off, but I think it's the death girl's going to get the boot, but they did the thing again. I don't know what it it is the softness for him like she went out there and did a set that was like This is about my dogs and which is the move and someone maybe gave her a smart move because They hidey clume who's looked puzzled at jokes before and says I just don't understand why you'd say a mean thing about Germany Remember that with the natterman. I think it was saying why you'd say a mean thing about Germany. Remember that with the Natterman I think it was?

Like Germans aren't really known for their humor, so I'm like, I'm just gonna get to go, why would you say something like she's so dead serious? She's proved the point. Yeah, completely and fucking like made it weird with them, but they, she says dogs up front this lady. And these are about my dogs and Simon Cowell's already way in. He just says that right away, anything with dogs. Yeah, Heidi Klum goes

You had me a dogs, but you watch her she does like Not great. They may fucking judge up these These tapes sometimes that the replay is on YouTube. Let me see because she has a very it's just like Ha ha ha and Simon's, you could win this entire thing. Do the one we watched with the Morty Puts. Oh my god. Ooh, an Irish wolf hound. Okay, I'm going to be honest.

Crowd work is a little difficult for a deaf comedian. But you said the four of you share custody of one beagle? Interesting. Oh, boy like that Look at the crowd not laughing and they're playing the noise Yeah, did you see the behind-the-the-audience not reacting at all and they're playing like a full-room laugh or what if I told you that whole crowd was ventriloquists Oh dude the ventriloquist lady last night. I'm ready. I'm done with that one I'm done with that one. She just stands there now at this point actually she's watching a movie and just does

Is it it must might be hopelessly devoted to you she sings but just like through her teeth and then doing weird things like she like Slowly puts a stroller. I'm actually They're like it's so stupid the ventriloquism is the one that tricks us that makes me definitely know he came from monkeys Every ventriloquist was like Is how are they talking while unnaturally smiling in a certain way? Why are they no fear smiling They're night wake up night they're someone staring at you facing... You're not on that I want.

You are not on that. It's tough smiling, you freaky weirdo. Aw, wakingings. You know what I want? Bring up that for a total quest. You gotta hear this jokes first. Dude, Heidi and Sophia Vergara like dog dogs too. There's also the two dudes that come out and they can't believe that no one's impressed

with their okay dance moves. There's the two boys that come out and dance together. It's pretty funny. Guckers, do you play this? I love dogs. I have four dogs, which is a red flag. That's too many dogs. Too many dogs for one person.

My dogs hate taking pills. Do you guys have a dog like that? A few in the front. My Australian shepherds are easy, right? You just wrap it in a little piece of something and they're just like, this cheese tastes like a moxasillin, right? Crazy world. My pit bull. bless his heart.

If you want him to take a pill, all you have to do is just pretend to drop it. That's it. Just, oh no. Gimli took a tartworm medication. Ah! Yeah! But my dog pinky.

Now that she's a dog owner, it's just so like, it's just middle of the road reaction, but when you hear the judging, they're just like, where did you come from? Who are you? How did you get Richard Prius spirit inside? Did you drive by his, was you driving by his? Are you familiar with voodoo? His funeral. Yeah. Did you chuckie dog his soul into you? Are you the late great George Colin? He goes dogs like this go dogs done dogs done on my end. What if you weren't up to your like dogs you ever fuck them? It's a little like human pussy It's warm. It's wet because I have fucked dogs and I love that you talk about it.

Damn dude, standing up. Wow! Simon you are all your feet! Wow, along with a lot of other people Terry. Hey, if you don't mind, I'm really curious because I love your act tonight. I want to know Why winning is important to you if you don't mind me asking Well, I've said it before and I'll say it again. I feel like I'm on just getting to be here at all. So Damn what a senator answered. I'll tell you why I'm gonna take your girl for me Simon. You took it from your friend now. I'm coming to take your bitch I'm gonna take your girl for me Simon you took her from your friend now coming to take your bitch I'm coming for you No, Cal I'm coming to get you

I'm sorry. Did you just rambo me? Yes first blood part two. Oh, I like that one I think you really parked tonight. I really, really do. You weren't daunted by being on the live shows. It was so comfortable. It was so funny. It was so original. And I think you got-

I think you got- People in the audience are doing this. They sh- Go, I'll go all. Yeah. Blow about you. That was a great performance. So, thank you. Thank you.

How are you, you are laughing, man? I was laughing out loud. I got to tell you that I wasn't here at COVID when you were on the first time, but I watched you and I was laughing hysterically at your first act. I was looking forward to tonight and you do as he's right. You rose to the occasion. I don't sense any nerves. You're authentic. You're funny. We love you America loves you I tell you my favorite thing they say on these shows America loves you the world loves you

I'm gonna tell you right now the New York Giants of the NFC East. I'll tell you this they love you She's 2000 percent a better comic than that girl that was like yeah You have a going to store and then someone don't hold a door for you America Killin though she was kind of this girl's his backstage You like you hear in this shit. They go are you are you here in the city? She's like now. Thank God Yeah, that's all just one noise America right am I pretty much something she's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, right. Just trying to guess the racism she's doing with her sign language. What do we do next to gay dancing boys? Yeah, absolutely. I mean, one of the controller quiz.

controller quiz is fun, but might be the last one of controller quiz. Yeah, the controller quiz. All of the controllers. I think these are the only three. We're talking about hypnotists with Zach and Chris, but uh, one of the first weekends I ever worked on the road, I was emceeing for a dirty magician Oh, and he was a ventriloquist as well And it was um jack-all fault trades chips cooney No, but man oh man was he did fake magic only

Yes But dude we have a duki standing in his underwear on purpose don't ruin it, but they Spoiler alert dirty magicians always just do tricks so they can fondle women in the crowds breasts on purpose. Don't ruin it. But then, uh, dude, spoiler alert. Dirty magicians always just do tricks so they can fondle women in the crowd's breasts. Oh, every time. Every time. The black comedy second version of that was put your arms under my arms. To the arms.

Yeah. And then they always gotta go, you know, at this point of day, I gotta adjust my dick at some point, you know. Yes. By the way, the white magicians do that too. Dude. If I had a fucking wallop like that, that would have great bit that would be,

but if a girl, I gotta grab my dick and she's just like patting the front of my pants. Where's this fucking, I'm like, I'll be like, that's the balls, but just, that's fine. It's all one bag. Just like, yeah, that's, yeah. It's a package.

They get it, please do the bit. So then I stop grabbing my dick and then, and then I put my hands on my hips and understood that this might have gone too far It's starting to myself I'm gonna throw it a bit Throw it a bit about I'm gonna have to replace this with a bit. Oh God This is the two dancers. Is this the dancey boys? Dude and they're mad you said they're mad because no one cares. Uh Yeah, I think the everyone was kind of like sure

Everybody's response was like I Like what we were dancing Dancing I think Simon's kind of like I gave you like you guys look seem nice Then we want to break their gay hearts The new ones to break their gay hearts. Dude, imagine me and you were like really into dancing. We'll tweet these out at the bottom five, I said some... Dan, if you would ever take time to learn this particular dance from me, I would do it with you. C'mon, you just won't. What the hell?

Yeah, they got to hand their hands, dude. Who's just TikTok dancing on the actual stage? These guys definitely took a shower after this and cried together. Oh my god. Ah, just held their show. Yeah, and not like Forest Gump with their backs to back. No, no, no, no, no, like hugging in the front. Yeah.

I'm saying like we're gonna be fine, dude. It doesn't matter Hit me my hit me my dick hair razor Are you using my dick hair razor humor humor through dancing? You two freaks Better do the hammer. I mean, it's really a yeah, they're just dancing You could turn this off. It's just dancing, but we'll put it out at the bonfire at 6am. Dude, and then you're so winded after bombing, you're like... Yeah, and people are like, actually go to the judging, that is funny, because when they're like,

I don't know, it was like far and they're like... Okay, well, you know, beatings and beans. And keeping those cheerleader faces, the whole time you're just fucking eating it. Well, most of the time they're just doing this is like cheerleading dancing Look the girls are both so like sure I've never been to ryer You sure It's all their dance. Oh, man They're judging as fun. Oh, it's probably yeah, they won't show it because it's negative

They probably don't show negative daily do the positive stuff on YouTube probably Yeah, it's not make it well because you're just think you don't want to sell out the performer completely Yeah, there's a thing of you getting judged like no one will take it Seriously at all, but I gotta tell you that man if you could get it if you get a chance to see it let home That's so funny. They're like um Yeah, it was fine Look you guys dance you guys can dance I guess But like we have so many a good like crazy choreographed like dance groups. Yeah

Of all these people they also got the performance I'm a I hope they send their asses home except they're very beloved is the Petaphiles paradise the fucking little girls with all the makeup on, they're like the new spice girls, but they're all like eight years old. Yeah, and they're like pumping, like pumping their crutches at everything. They go, our ratings dropped in men, 41 to 55,

after these little girls were eliminated. And who's the girl who made the thing, Curtis Sleewa? Jojo Sleewa. Jojo Sleewa. It wasn't Curtis Sleewa at all, the leader was in the C.Waw. Jojo C.Waw. It wasn't Curtis Leawaw at all the leader. Oh, this is the chaos of guardian angels. I thought he was coaching them.

You're patrolling the streets in New York City. Come on, girls. We're going to sex this up. You got to want it more to the next guy. What is this? This is the girls coming out. Look, their song sucks so much I feel like this is the only kind of this music should only be in Japanese so you can't understand the language

Damn dude they have leggings like the berserker in the WWF? The brand new sound. Oh, you have this on I go in your bar beat in your own new sound We're doing a show show your ass Jacob their children, dude. By the way, I'm pretty sure she said the N word in that row. It's a great rumor, but if you slow it down, it's convinced people she said it. You know, say Tannik. You know what she's saying? Listen to her, she says, dark lord. Like, they're so okay with with it into it that it's weird Yeah, they sing like cartoon pandas. It just seems like something that should be a cartoon network

Because I'm done with the show now don't stop get get oh They don't get get What I wonder you taking your time stamps you can go home and beat this lady. I wonder if any of them are like Right when they're done in the backstage. I go. I don't want to do this Please tell me me dude. I want to see my parents again. I miss my puppy shut the fuck up Zana do put your goddamn fucking glitter makeup on get the fuck out there Athena you know this is important I'm sorry. I'm sorry on him on a pia, but if you're gonna be in this group puppy pause puppy pause you start with me now You put it put your hand out. Oh, this was Joe Joe C. wall. Yeah, this is the girl that oh, so yeah, this is just abuse

Abusing the next generation that's actually her yeah She was like a tea oh, so she just dresses them like her. Yeah, she was like a YouTube stalk How many are you after like after Isabella's generation before Juliana's man, so she's got an abusive mom behind it, huh? Yeah, she was like on those dance mom shows. Yeah, there it is All that she's she a great dancer I don't know much about her to be honest. She's lesbian now. She is Finally got some wheelies on in this video. That's pretty dope wheelies are dope. Oh, I wonder what guy in charge of this video jammed up into that world

Wonder which old perv flifter have you ever tried kissing when you background dances? You know that would make poppy very happy. You're the truck using me I don't know what you have one of the truck is an old Put this all the me I don't know what you want to try kissing a old producer. But you're old me. I'm just saying we're hanging out about it. Yeah, maybe I'm reading things wrong. I tend to do that sometimes.

I'm working late and then I end up your little girl and I'm a 56 year old man. But sometimes I like, you know know I think about you kissing me. You want to kiss. But you're my teacher. You go, nah, that's what I'm saying. It's great. See the guy be weak need over a kid. I don't know, I'm sleeping.

Yeah, I'm sleeping. I don't want to do that. I just thought that takes something when the camera's on around. It's a cure pedophile. It's a cure pedophile. Oh shit. I thought I'd take something with the cameras on around Sometimes the way you look at the other adults and I don't see the darn just things because you sure are fat You know, yeah, I would work on it for you Like yeah, you wouldn't be in the someone like me. Do you ever listen to Frank Sinatra? like me. Do you ever listen to Frank Sinatra?

Did you want to? Who? He's a nice singer. You know what, I- That song was in the SpongeBob movie because- Yeah. Yes it was. It was.

It was. It goes, yeah. You know, I think about you, some of the cars from the back here. I go by play- You think about me? Yeah. I go by a playground and I go,

Jojo, love that slide, you know. No, no, no, weird like, no, no, no, you would enjoy it. But I don't know. You want to go upstairs? We can go upstairs. You have to go upstairs. Do you have to go buy an OTB and think about me?

You hear? You ever smell a cigar and scotch? Yeah, you think going on compete, it might be around. You miss your old friend Glenn and his back rubs. Yeah, then go to Uncle Pete. I think it might be around. You miss your old friend Glenn and his back rubs? Anyway, you know, our wrestling sessions meet the world to me.

You know, I love our shirtless hugger. Yeah, I wouldn't give this up for the world. Bath time. I'm over the moon about it. Do you sell for wear and secure pedophiles? I'm pumped over the moon about it Somewhere insecure pedophile she goes I don't know wouldn't that hurt if we did daddy Like yeah, probably I don't know what I'm saying. I'm again. I work Probably wait wish you wait wish you wait be it long jump time Anyway, hang out watch TV do whatever

Anyway, hang out watch TV do whatever Old and nothing with my credit card. I get it. Oh fuck stick up rig. Yeah Support guys who bang kids then hot then no not at all Jacob. I see it's Christ. What an accusation? I might my god No, why is she say she likes me? I don't know. I wish you doing Friday. Why did she say something about me? She bring me up. You know what'd be funny is if we pranked phone call, but... You guys want to call her? Like, she says that.

She's like, when we come back, we'll be talking about someone who took show the movie poster for Narcual for it in Kevin Hart doing a movie together holding a giant turtle. I just saw the movie poster. I didn't see it. It's just, it's Narcual for it in Kevin Hart's hilarious duo. But do the comments and the Facebook gamers do were actually, I don't the movie poster. I didn't see it. It's just it's dark wallberg and Kevin Hart to hilarious do it But do the comments and the Facebook gamers group are actually I don't know if we can make much funnier of it It's so funny. There's like it seems like Kevin Hart screaming about a bunch of things unnecessarily and Mark Wahlberg making confused face They show examples of both and I'm like, yeah, probably yeah, that's how they wrote that they probably wrote that movie in 35 minutes me time there it is

Yeah, that's how they wrote that, they probably wrote that movie in 35 minutes. Me time. There it is. Blah! Can'ts already screaming in the poster. Scream and, and Mark's confused. Yeah, he goes, what's that over there? I don't know. Is it illegal to steal a turtle? Is that a turtle habitat? I don't know. I just feel like taking it out of its rightful place of things.

We're gonna put this thing back, yo. Yeah, this might be dangerous for the turtle's life. We should have listened to the trail when we come back. Done. I bet it's got confusion in screams. Done, do you think? think Netflix August 26th that means Oh Also big J's gonna be in Tampa this Friday and Saturday yeah I fucking tickets Tampa improv

Go buy tickets at big J comedy.com because also get tickets from Mac McGubbies in Maryland and also the Columbus Funnybone to find out all tour dates and get tickets bigjaycomedy.com. And Dan Sotas is going to be in Tulsa Oklahoma this Saturday, the 27th with Adrian Apollucci is going to be out there with him. Then the DC in Proff September 8th to the 10th. After that, he's got Addison, Texas coming up. Cleveland Ohio for tickets and all tour dates go Go of course dancota.com. Yeah. Pantheore plays the week, you know, it's Dan Sotas,

top 10 Queens of Stone Age songs, plus popularized by Biggie. A lot of people have been, got a couple of messages of like, oh, I love all these B-sides. Dan, you're playing at Canes Ballroom. Yeah, Canes Ballroom in Tulsa, Oklahoma this Saturday. Is it, turnpike true, but ours are songs,

they sing about that club. No shit. It has a little, little trippy of for you. Anyway. Okay, I ask you not to talk about mine. Who's the tube stick troubadours? They're, they're good country band. Oh.

Tube stick troubadours. Turnpike. Turnpike. Oh, nothing on, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no Turnpike turnpike I'm gonna ride up it This guy's 55. Why bet you shave that bum don't you look at you? Hello look at this baby seal Hello, Lance nice to meet you. Oh, why aiden chombed. I'm sure oh man We've loosened says daddy dom is his name. This is him biting a fucking horse whip I We have loosens his daddy dom as his name. This is him biting a fucking horse whip. I Love I love pain and I love subservants

Bow to daddy and daddy will not hurt you. I will I have my heels on I got my eight install it was on ready to stomp your ball back. Hahahaha! Stop balling, you're going to go. Oh, let's take a break. It's the mind-fire. Those meatballs were incredible. Thank you. You've been listening to SiriusXM's bonfire! New episodes, every Tuesday through Friday mornings and full shows always on SiriusXM!