The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Mother Of Pearl (feat. Sal Vulcano)

Episode Date: June 20, 2024

Sal Vulcano hangs out for the whole show. Bobby plays a hilarious old video of The Tenderloins; the comedy troupe that would later become The Impractical Jokes. Christine's dog humps her leg and she puts music behind it. Jay has new color of nail polish. FOLLOW THE CREW ON SOCIAL MEDIA: @thebonfiresxm @louisjohnson @christinemevans @bigjayoakerson @robertkellylive @louwitzkee @jjbwolf

And now the bonfire with Big Jay Okerson and Robert Kelly When you wake up in the morning and the light is hurt your head The first thing you do when you get up out of bed Is hit that streets are running and try to beat the masses The first thing you do when you get up out of bed Is hit that streets for running and try to meet the masses And go get yourself some cheap sunglasses Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! I spy that little thing and I followed her all night

In her funky, fine Levi's and her sweat is kinda tight She had a West Coast strut that was sweet as molasses Now what really knocked me out was her cheap sunglasses Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah I'm going to be a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a

little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a

little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a So Yo, we're back.

Sal has a special right now. Terrified. Terrified. It's on YouTube. Just look it up. YouTube. com slash at 800 PGM. If you remember that. But just look up sale. New tour is on sale, too. Are you taking reading this? Really? New tour right away.

Yeah. No, it's on sale. Starts in November, but it's everything's fine tour. And it's all new material. It's on sale right now at Savile County Comedy. So it's not the material on the special. It is not. And it's not the material on the special or any material I've done. I'm writing it now. I'm working on it now.

Nice. But it's on sale. You're writing it for the tour? That's great. Yeah. Did you take some time home to work everything out and everything? Yeah. So that's why the tour starts in November.

But it's up. It's up. It's on sale. Everything's fine. Christine, bring up the YouTube of Sal serving with the glasses on and the sit and spin punishment. It's like waiter punishment. Sal waiter punishment. You might call it dizzy waiter.

If we're gonna look up Sal clips, we have to look up I Fucked Your Son. Oh please. It's my favorite clip of all time. By all means. It's the funniest fucking song. It's stuck in my head for three months. I used to be walking down the street and go, I fucked your son. I fucked your son. I wonder if it's stuck in my head for three months. Yeah, I used to be walking down the street go

I fucked you son Fucked you sir. It's still online. I hope it's gotta be so this is where he's got the glasses on so Bobby should watch this so so explain this show context showing this is one of my favorite little context Jay I love that you love the show a little context is Sal's punishment on the episode of practical jokers is They're gonna give him different context is Sal's punishment on the episode of Impractical Jokers is they're gonna give him different obstacles to overcome while he's serving people at a restaurant and the first one they have here is he's wearing goggles that changes perception completely and like wildly not like a little bit like a

little off-line. Were they like just a different description? They had these little, like, no, they were like specialty glasses where like, if you, I saw like two of you. This was at Dallas Barbecue in Times Square, actually. That's good, those people are understanding in Times Square. Yeah. That's a real good group of people. Did somebody recently in a sketch get really mad at you?

Yeah, that's coming up. Is it coming up? Season 11, we're filming it right now, it starts July 11th. Yeah, someone sent me something that was like, I think this lady's actually furious. She was gonna kill me, I'll tell you what, you wanna tell you what that is?

We have a show on this thing first, and I'm gonna lose the pacing of this here. But yes, I do wanna know that. Christine, play please. Water glass. Hey, sir, get you some more water. So he's walking up and pouring water on tables. You're messing up!

You're messing up! You're messing up! You're pouring water on the table! You gotta be ten, one of them's like two black women and I'm like that's gotta be the scariest because... Oh Jesus. And the best is just confidence. Yeah, jump ahead now, Christine, a little bit, because this is now, he's got to put glasses of water on tables. Okay, you can play it there.

Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. One of them you just start stacking them within each other. Oh, it's a baby. Oh, she has a baby. She has a baby. Oh no. Keep going, keep going. That's what you said. He put it in his lap.

What did he do? Did he put it in his laugh. What did he do? Did he put it on... And now jump ahead to when he does the sit and spin. Actually, it's one of the funniest things you say too. I think they make me do one first before that one. Like a lighter version. Now go back a second, because that's one of my favorite jokes.

You say, there they go. So I'll be careful, it's only like a hundred and something weight limit. That should be fine. Right here? Yeah. Two, one, launch them. Get the train, get the train. Get the train, get the train. Go, go.

Oh, shit. Nailed it. Yes, I'm fine, thank you. Drove into tables. Happens once in a while. Thank you so much. All right, Sal, go into your next station there bud the old-school sit and spin oh yeah okay caution also sell the weight limit is 125 pounds so we're not sure what's

gonna happen here what do you mean that should be fine go baby go all right this was such a set up to fail situation oh my my god. Whoa guys. There you go. Whoa. Go go! He smashed into the wall. Did that hurt? Oh shit. His shoe is off. It's like a car accident. His shoe is off. It's like a car accident.

His shoe is off. He was never fully standing. I actually crawled back. I crawled back in and my foot was bleeding. Oh, fuck. I'm so serious. Two inches to the left of that wall was the glass with the fire hose in it.

I would have went right through the... My face would have went right through a glass. Nobody even talks. Has anybody ever gotten hurt really bad? Yeah, yes, a couple times, yeah. Murray's been hurt a few times pretty badly. He's got some like bad like burns, like freeze up. Oh, Q got, he got into the hospital

because he put him in an ice bath, but it was supposed to be for like, not a long time, like 15 minutes, but we filmed for like an hour, and then his clothes were stuck to him. They had to wrap him up and he was just on a blanket for like an hour, he couldn't even speak. Was it an hour ice bath?

Yeah, that's like hypothermia. You're supposed to stop it like a minute. Or I think you build up to like 20 minutes. Whatever it was, whatever the time was, it was like he blew past the time by like 10 times more. And I remember his denim was stuck to his legs because it got burned on. Full of clothes.

Yeah. That was bad. Murray got a really, really bad infection in his ear because I don't know why, but I put a whole bunch of Vaseline in it for some reason. And it got in and got infected. And he was like jacked up. He had to stay in the hospital. There's a few things here and there, you know

It's so funny to come in practical joking related injuries You did the did you find used to do skits before it? I thought I met you through the impractical jokers, but then I found all your skits that you guys used to yeah Yeah, it is comedy. We did one of the funniest skits. It's still fucking makes me laugh today I fucked your son where the guy you got he got mad at you right for something. Yes, so It's just tenderloin stuff. You did. That's all it is. It's yeah, it's a we just played cat I mean, so yes, we were roommates myself and Murray and I ate his moogoo guy pan is extra his Chinese food That was left over and he got furious at me.

And then he built a time machine, and he went into the future. But he just goes in the closet, and you see just red lights underneath, but for some reason, it worked. And actually, it looked pretty good. It had smoke coming out of it. It had a little smoke coming out.

It was just a closet with a light and a little smoke, and it's like, dude, it looks like a time machine. Yeah, yeah. And then he comes back out, and he says... But he had a different... Didn't he have something else on, right? I had a different, didn't he have something else on? I don't remember. I think he had something else on.

Yeah. And then he came out. He came back out and he says, listen, he goes, you know, I went to, just so you know, I was a little man at what you just did to me and I built the time machine and I went into the future and I'm like, okay. And he's like, and just so you know,

you have a daughter one day and I fucked your daughter. And I was like, what? And he's like, he showed me like pictures of her as a kid growing up, all that stuff. And he's like, and I fucked your daughter. And I was like, what? And he showed me pictures of her as a kid, growing up, all that stuff. And I just look at him, I'm like, my baby girl. And I just run like a beeline down the hall, and he tries to stop me, and I get off of him, and I jump in the time machine.

The lights go off and the smoke comes out. I come back in his time, like one minute later, but it's really been like... And I sit back down, and I'm like like fuming, but I look like I'm happy and he's like, he's just ignoring me playing video games and like, you're not concerned that I just went into the future? And he's like, no.

He's like, cause he goes, what'd he say? He goes, I've been, he goes, I went to the future, before you, I don't have a daughter. And I was like, no, but you do have a son. And I fucked your son. He's like, dude, his energy, he stands up and he slaps and he goes, I fucked your son and he slaps his own foot and then the song he starts, I fucked your son.

I fucked your son. Yeah, just, basically it would have been a penalty if it was in the end zone. And then I said, I didn't even just fuck him, that would have been easy. I said, I dated him for six months. I had him fall in love with me and I broke his heart. 2008, Statlin, just two ass, what was it?

Like four asses with a camera, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was just the four of us. This is where it all started, right? From this? Yeah, we started doing this in 99, but this was... Wow. Sup, guys? but this was a... I've already been to the future, and unlike you, I don't have a daughter. You're right. You don't have a daughter. But you do have a son.

And I fucked your son. Yeah! I fucked your son! Ring a bell, Craig Murray, boom! Fucked him! How about that? You thought you had me, cause you didn't have a daughter. No, I went into the future and I fucking fucked your son! I fucked your son and he fucked me back!

That's it! I went to his 21st birthday, I said, excuse me, is Craig Murray around? And I saw him, and I bought him some shots, it only took a few. And that's not it. Just fucking yourself with a magazine. I didn't stop there. This is the genius. I've been taking him for six months, and I dumped him, and I broke his heart.

Check it out. You remember when he was born, right? I was born with that pose. First date, second date, third, fourth, first time, second time, third time, fourth time, fourth time, fifth time, fifth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time,

fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time,

fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth time, time, fourth time, fourth time, fourth, we both liked it I fucked your son, I fucked James, my son name was Craig And I fucked him all the time, I fucked, fucked, fucked, fucked your son I fucked your son, he fucked me, I fucked him, I fucked him, I fucked him, I fucked him Don't you be a little stupid now, but I really really fucked your son! Somebody say hey, we want some penis!

Hey, we want some penis! I pop-pop-poked his face, I pop-pop-poked his face! Son likes me and I like to put my balls on him! Son likes me and I like to put my balls on him! Whoa-oh-oh, whoa-oh-oh, whoa-oh-oh, whoa-oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Dude. Man, Q's voice sounds so different. His song. Shit. Dude.

It's fucking so funny. This is a bar we can't even throw. Dude, his first song? Let's not talk about this. It's between me and you, it'll stay between me and you like gentlemen. song? Let's not talk about this. Between me and you, it'll stay between me and you like gentlemen. Plus I lied. Got you. Got you.

Can you play the first song? I think they should, Jelly Roll should make this a song. The first one where you turn into blues we do a video montage go back and I fucking fuck your son. I fuck your son and he fuck me back. I went to his 21st. That's the best one. I fuck your son. I fuck your son and he fuck me back. At the end of this, we did this whole photo shoot.

It's a video montage of me and his son's whole relationship at the end of it. It's ridiculous. It has me at the bar at his birthday, getting him shots and our whole relationship and everything. This kid is fucking genius. Oh, it's not on that? Oh, it cuts off there?

It's a whole time on time. Buddy. You've never seen that. It's so funny. It is fucking the best. I sang that song for like two months. I'd be rocking on the street. I fucked your son.

I fucked your son and he fucked me back. It's great. Thanks, man. Thank you. Can you tell us about the thing you said I fucked your son, I fucked your son, and he fucked me back. It's great. Thanks, man, thank you. Can you tell us about the thing, you said someone got hostile with you. Oh, yeah, so we did this thing at Cane's Chicken. Raising Canes.

Raising Canes, and so we did- Here in Times Square? I'd say it was in Brooklyn. And basically what happened was we were playing managers, and we had to go out on the floor and just be playing managers. And then at some point, we were gonna have to throw somebody out of the restaurant,

but we didn't know who or why. And so we all got to keep it a secret from each other. And so for example, like Murray, or some cue went out there, whatever. And then in the middle of it, someone proposed to his girlfriend and the place was cheering. He had to be like, no, no, not in here. Like, you know, get out, get out of

my store. And everyone's like, what are you doing? Like boo. You know, it was like, like that. And then I wish I would remember this. I wish I would remember this. The other one that we got, uh, one of them to do, it was even better than that one. I forget what it was. Then I went last. They had this seven year old kid come in and go to any of the places packed. He took about 10 minutes to go to every single person that place and say I lost my mother. The kids a plant. It's plant. OK. That lost my mother. The kid was like almost in the verge of tears. I'm not alone. I lost my mother. I lost my mother. And then after he hit every single person that restaurant, they like kick him out. And I just have to

be like, I, not in here. I'm sorry. Go find your mother outside. I'm sorry. And at a place literally, oh, I know the other one. I know the other one. Q had to kick a couple out that way. Q had to kick a couple out that way.

Just got engaged. We were trying to get engaged. He wouldn't let it happen. So he took the ring and everything. Murray, a woman went into labor and he kicked her out. And she was on the phone like, it's coming now. And he grabs her by the legs, he's pulling her. He's sliding her on the floor while she's,

it was Shay, he's holding a pregnant belly. And they're like, what are you doing? Guys jumped up, he's like, she has to get out. She can't have this baby here. She's getting out. And then the kid, dude, he asked everyone, like he was like, I don't know what my mother is. And everyone's like getting concerned.

I mean, he talked to the whole restaurant. Then I was like, let's go. And he was like, I don't know where my mother is, and everyone's getting concerned. I mean, he talked to the whole restaurant, and I was like, let's go! And I was like, you gotta get out. And everyone just got, I mean, jumped up. Look for her outside. But he's bothering the diners. I'm like, I understand, but his mother's here, so this is not our problem here at Raising Cane's.

Somebody said that on TikTok. Well, someone just videoed it, because it was like confrontation. I think, like, thinking it was real. It was real, yeah, because the woman got in my face. That's actually weird. I thought she was gonna swing on me.

Is that one of the first times that's happened, like where it's like, it went out as like, Yeah, it went out as- Like someone just like, holy shit, look at this moment. Yeah, and half the people thought it was real, and the other half was like, and so it went kind of viral, and it was just like the woman in my face screaming, I'm like, what do you want me to do about this?

I didn't know, we didn't know when it was taping. And you just, it never got like, scary enough to have to break? It was scary, I was, I was, it was a half a second. I heard DeRosa said it on a prank once, and they said, DeRosa said how quick he was just like, ah, that's a show. When DeRosa did a prank once and they said, DeRosa said how quick he was just like, ah, that's a show.

When DeRosa did a prank with DeRosa, you stayed with it when the people were getting that angry. Cause I'm like, how fair, all it would take is one person to be like, excuse me, where I'd be like, it's a show, I suck. It's, don't look now, but everyone's looking at us, it's a show. There's a camera right there, there's a camera right there.

Yeah, I have a thicker skin than when we started, but was bad and I felt very like very very nervous and scared inside But like what was she saying to you? I meant she was screaming who the fuck you know you this is a child You don't do this to children just screaming and everybody that was like yeah It was like a mob like another and I I was like was like, I was a half a second from giving in. I just took a deep breath because I knew that, like, we were in such a good, I had everybody in such a good spot. Cause I'm also like, I also wanted to be funny and like really like good.

And I was like, how long can I hold out before I crumble? And I just meekly was like, I'm so sorry, but he has to go out at the end. And then they like relinquished a little bit and the kid walked out. So I got it on like a, I just, I was like, I'm so sorry, but he has to go out at the end. And then they relinquished a little bit, and the kid walked out. So I got it on like a, I was just, at the very end I just went, I don't know what to tell you, he has to get out.

And they didn't, they didn't, and they were like, God, but right before it, I was like this close to me. They would've said no, I would've been like, all right, I'm done. But it was tough, it was really tough. You should've took the kid by the hand, be like, I'll raise him then,

and walk out and store them. Fine, I'll raise him. You should've took the kid by the hand, be like, I'll raise him then, and walk out the store with him. Fine, I'll raise him. And see the two of you walk out together, never stop walking, and let me show you, see you walking in front of him, he goes, if he's joking now, that's weird. Singing the song, I fucked your son, I fucked your son and he fucked me back.

Yeah, she was heated. Oh, we forgot to talk about the fact that we saw, we all went to see Gary Clark right before I left. As a big family. Oh yeah. That's so cool that he's a fan of you, that's so cool. We like to take trips together as a group. Sometimes local, sometimes abroad. But you know what's better than planning the perfect getaway?

What's that, Jay? Someone planning it for you and taking care of every detail. Where all you gotta do is show up and have fun. Well, you get that and more with Gate 1 Travel for this is how you read a commercial. So for over 40 years Gate 1 Travels provided quality, affordable escorted tours, river cruises and vacation packages that deliver experiences beyond your wildest dreams. Their amazing escorted packages include everything from airfare and hotels to meals, transportation, transfers, and exceptional local guides.

So yeah, you just show up. Gate 1 offers hundreds of tours and see more of the world for less. I think I inspired you on that though. I gave the same pause as you at the end. I think I inspired you to really raise your game because your game, you know what I mean? That was really good.

I was getting cocky. I was a little cocky. I deserved something better. That was fantastic. That could have been a sizzle reel for voiceover work. Thank you. You should do voiceover work. You have a base, you understand how to deliver a line.

Jelly Roll told them that this weekend in the gay circle While they were doing each other's nails fucking mother of pearl Fucking suck you don't hate it. I want to tell you who had the best time this week. I hate it I should not like mother of pearl. I will take purple black I'll take any other color you have even that mauve you put on a few weeks ago But this I might do a light pink dude, I'd take light pink before Mother of Pearl. I don't like Mother of Pearl. Understood. I think it's classy and versatile.

It goes with a lot of the stuff I wear. Yeah, sure. You wear a lot of Dutch lace. Mm-mm. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. That's Bobby. I'm Jay.

And to get our full show, sign up for a SiriusXM subscription at SiriusXM.com slash bonfire. Support our show. Don't be some jerk off just taking the free stuff. Let them know you want us to be here forever. Or we won't. Or maybe we won't. Subscribe. Dude, I tell you, you had a good weekend. I had a good weekend. We all had a good weekend, but nobody had a better weekend

than Christine Why? Cuz she was her Her and Dawkins were going getting down. Oh Her and Dawkins were fucking banging this weekend they were having fun We're having a hard time in the grant. Our dog's pretty well behaved, quite honestly. But uh.

She said that video, dude. I was like. It's crazy. What the fuck? Our dog's pretty well behaved, but Christine is having that first time dog. She has no, she draws no lines for this dog at all. This dog can run her life

She loves this dog so much and draws and these are things the dog shouldn't be doing but she doesn't stop it She laughs at the bad things the dog and then she sent us the video I'm like sent out that a dog our dog essentially is female prison raping Christine She just ha and she just tries to attack her with fuck hips. It's batshit crazy. And then Christine, instead of stopping it as you're supposed to, any vet would tell you that.

You gotta stop that. Christine just goes, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. I usually do stop her, but as she was maniacally air humping her toy, as she does, she like, she gets overexcited about her toys. She holds it in her mouth, she comes over, she grabs a leg or grabs a couch

and just starts humping the air. And I was like, oh, wouldn't it be funny to put this to Short Short Man by Gillette? And so I filmed her. It'd even be funny to put it to I fucked your girl, I fucked your girl and she fucked my back. And I thought the crew would enjoy it, Isabella did. Oh, we did enjoy it, I jerked off to it.

It was fucking hot. Are you gonna play it? I'm trying to, I can't get it sent to myself. Oh, God. Wow. Sure, wow. I didn't know Bobby's gonna bring it up. Why is the female dog humping though?

The female humps? To dominate. The female humps? Sure. It seems strange, I know, I'd agree, that it is weird. It's like a pegging situation. I get situation I get I mean she's got I mean she goes for it it's like just be the angel I thought the It's to the beat. I mean, it's... But she stops and then she's like, you like that? She's stopping.

You like that? Here's a little more. Yeah. Christine, good dog-momming. It's funny. Well, that's how your kid ends up on the pole. You'll see. We're all laughing now, right?

It's like we're all laughing at a five year old Hispanic little girl who's dancing around doing twerk moves and we're all like, oh, it's cute. And then before you know it, she's getting cash thrown at her at a strip club. Here's the thing though, that wasn't the, she had to, it actually had, she was getting fucked for a minute

and then was like, let me get the phone and then let me get the song to it. Like she. Yeah, oh, absolutely. That was like the let me get the phone and then let me get the song to it. Like she. Yeah. Oh, absolutely. That was like the third fuck. She was like, oh, I recreate this Dawkins. Fuck. Yeah. Well, this is this is like this is some fucking going on. Like you did it the first time.

Yeah. We play. She's a stage mom. I was really hoping I'd get a good hump. We throw her. She has her little like leopard and tiger toys, and we throw them, and she gets overexcited about it, and she just holds it and humps it. Yeah, because she knows she's gonna fuck you. I say, I'm like, Dawkins, stop humping,

but I decided this time to film it because it was too funny. I've never heard of a female dog humping, but then again, it's not something I really look up and... They're having a lesbian relationship while I'm on the road. That's why the Dawkins is never upset when I'm leaving. She just gives me a red-eyed look up from when I'm leaving in the morning. She's like, oh, good.

Game on. Game on. Then she crawls around to the sheets and does Christ knows what. Now you know why the dog is in the bed all the time. There she goes. Oh, look at that. Oh, look at her. She's biting the toy, which is hilarious. That's a threesome.

The tiger, you. Tongue's hanging out. She's exhausted. She's been fucking for hours. She's exhausted. Is there any way to play it and then like we'll pick different songs to see if it changes the mood? Absolutely. Yeah, I'd love to see like different moods. I would, uh, yeah, let's do, uh...

Nine Inch Nails maybe? Maybe a little D'Angelo?, maybe a little D'Angelo. Yeah, I like the D'Angelo. A little, how does it feel? Wait, I gotta turn the music down here. Got it. And then Lou, go ahead, Lou. You have D'Angelo?

Yeah, a little in the middle. Just go in the middle of it. I've been on my own That's a different vibe. Oh shit. I've been on my own That's a different vibe. Oh shit. That's making love right now. Everybody, when we put this video out, feel free to put your own music to it. Send it back to us.

This is the fucking best. Ah shit. The best song, the best song, might win tickets to the Olympus Goods Corrie Felton. Yeah, the best video with the best song, uh, the best song, it might win tickets to Olympus, get Cory Felton. Yeah, the best video with the best song wins those tickets. I just bought her that tiger, so she's very excited. Yeah, of course she did. I got one.

Can we try Wicked Game by Chris Isen? Yes, absolutely, for sure. Do you see how she's like holding my leg but humping the air? Can you now see if, put it to the twerkelator please? Christine if you could run the video back please while the twerkelator plays. I'm gonna get the twerkelator plays. We need to get the twerkelator going. Play it. You gotta get that Miami Thump music, it's what's really gonna bring this video out for

sure. Twerkelator. Maybe, what's it called? I Wanna Rock Right Now? Is that Luke? Is that what it's called? Too Live Crew? Yeah, does it pop that pussy?

Don't Stop, I Wanna Rock Right Now. Yeah, I know what you're saying, man. You know what it's called, Luke. You're a DJ. It's, uh, I want to I know what you're saying man, you know what it's called Lou. You're a DJ You know the artist we already say it was to live crew It's a it's it's a remix of that of samples that though. Did you bring them? Yeah, did you bring them? Did you bring them? Cuz that's gonna be the ultimate song for this. I think the ultimate song is short short man

Yeah, you probably thought better than three professional comedians Yeah play It gives you the energy. Ha ha ha ha ha! Yeah! Ha ha ha ha! Now, Tolkien's let me hear you growl head, head, and mo head! Head, head, and mo head!

Well, gotta get some rock and roll. There's gotta be a rock song, J, that would go to. Uh, a rock song. Let me think. What about like a full, full 180, psh, psh, psh, psh. Some death tones. What about like a full, full 180, like a Secret Lovers from the 80s? Okay, a little Atlantic, is that Atlantic Star? It might be Atlantic Star.

I don't, you're so good. It's not Atlantic Star. Maybe it is Atlantic Star. Is it Atlantic Star? Nailed it. Hang on, hang on. ["Secret Lovers"] Secret Lovers. Hey, hang on, hang on. Secret love. Secret love.

Secret love. Secret love. Secret love. Secret love. Secret love. Secret love. Secret love. Secret love.

Secret love. Secret love. Secret love. Backdoor man by the doors. Oh No, Roadhouse Blues, maybe It's impossible not to be funny. Yeah Dawkins fucking really can't go to anything It's like a magic trick how it goes to every beat. Christine getting banged out on the shin goes to every song. Yeah. Great. Now you got cum on your skims.

She doesn't cum. Miso Horny? She's a squirter. Miso Horny's pretty great. What about Master of Puppets? Think Master of Puppets would go? Yeah, what, like the Suicide songs? Fade to Black.

Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Yeah, I suggest, can I... Sure, Jacob, jump in, buddy. I suggest, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Yeah, I suggest, can I, uh. Sure, Jacob, jump in, buddy. Take my breath away, Berlin. Oh. Oh, that's good.

Possible, it's possible. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. So funny. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Should be in silhouettes, though. Yeah. Dawkins on a motorcycle, sunset going down. Yeah.

I'll do it in the fucking. Love this game. So good. Fantastic. Take these broken wings, Mr. Mist. This is the best. I think take these broken wings is a good one. Are we overdoing it? I don't know.

No. No. I'll do this all day. When the video goes out. They'll get it It's already out there you can see it on our Twitter feed Have fun have fun with that Damn, I know the shows almost it really flew by today There's so many fun things we could have talked about well We just say went to Gary Clark we should talk about that real quick

There's so many fun things we could have talked about. We just went to Gary Clark. We should talk about that real quick. We talked about it on Wednesday. We could talk. He wasn't here. Oh. Jay wasn't here. Jay was playing softball with lesbians.

First of all, we were playing hardball with the party animals, the Savannah bananas. And we were, yeah, taking some swipes. Did I connect on a few? Yeah. Wore batting gloves this time. Last time I didn't wear batting gloves last year, And we were uh, yeah taking some swipes. Did I connect on a few? Yeah We're batting gloves this time last time did more batting gloves last year bore a hole right through my thumb Swiping for the fences constantly, but I put it together this year got a couple slaps off of a fucking pro player I mean, he wasn't throwing heat of any kind. It was bad. We know that's the No, he was doing batting practice, But I mean, like, when everyone's watching

and there are cameras, you're like, please, God, connect. And I did all right. That's good. Did pretty good. Yeah, we went to, uh, it was fun. I love sitting next to Lou. Lou and I at a concert, it's hilarious.

Why? He was basically telling me what I was doing wrong. Everything you were doing wrong? Yeah, I was talking during the noodling. You're not supposed to talk during the noodling. I was teaching him how to be a good audience. Yeah, woo, I was teaching, woo, here we go, ready? He was doing it this engendered.

I was going woo, but then he was like, you gotta wait, feel it, and then when it happens, woo! I got my woo! Then you yelled, you gave a good yell out of Gary. I went Gary. Yeah, I stopped him from doing that. I told him not to do that. But I did do that.

I got two other Garys after that. I got two other people that go Gary, Gary. Right, I did get a couple Garys. And then I did it, I went woo during the Noodle-ing. He goes, never woo during the Noodle-ing. Don't, you don't noodle woo, yeah, you don't noodle woo. Yeah, you don't noodle woo. Was your first time at a blues rock concert?

No, my second. I went to his first one. Oh, he's... I caught the end of it. Caught the end of it, yeah. He is, he's, I compare him to Marvin Gaye and Jimi Hendrix. He's so talented, unbelievable. Yeah, he's really, that way he plays guitar. The guy couldn't do anything not cool.

I've been a fan of his before I realized that he told you he was a fan of yours and I was like, oh my god, that's insane. Yeah, he's fucking, he's awesome. I know. And also when you meet him, he's like a great guy too. They still don't meet your, I know you had this thing with the guy who was just mean.

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. A musician that you liked that was just like mean right away. Who was that? He wasn't really mean, but he was, it was, it was, it wasn't what I, I was such a big fan and so excited. It was me. I went to Overboard and he gave me a lot less than I. Bobby Brown? Yeah, it was Bobby Brown.

Yeah. Who was it? Nobody goes, is it Ronnie DeVoe? Yeah. It was Michael Bivens and no, it wasn't him, it was me. But it was... Who was it? It was Taylor Dane. No, it was, oh my God.

You don't remember? Leon? Leon Bridges. Leon Bridges, right. It was me. Yeah. It wasn't him. He was at some pool party in Nashville I never go to these things but I was there for the weekend and someone convinced me

to go to like this dive motel party we're burnt we gotta go he was there and this guy is I mean he's really he's amazing and he's got like four or five albums now. They're all amazing it was when I was before I got married and his one of his songs was in contention for a wedding song and We had seen him in concert a bunch of times and it was the place petered out It went from like a couple hundred people like maybe 30 people and he was up dead I mean he was he had on a suit like he had on a suit. Like, he had on like, it was a pool party. He had on platform shoes, bell bottoms, a silk shirt open with chains, he had on a big hat.

And he was dancing like nobody was watching. For like two hours. So he was peak, it was no, like he didn't care. I don't think anyone even looked at him, no one noticed him. As soon as he woke up, I go, that's Leon Bridges. And there was a sign in sheet, and nobody believed me. So I went and I looked and he signed his name was him and so at the end of the night

He's standing by the DJ booth at the top of the pool. There's like 30 people left. No one's paying attention He's going off like he's in a music video and I was like, you know on the way out before I leave I'm leaving right now. I'll go and I say excuse me and I'll just let him know that we love him dance floors for everybody jerk off And you know his songs and content. I just want to be getting married. I might have even said like and we're using your song. I wasn't going to tell him it's between you and and this other

song and you and Billy Joe. Between you and I don't know some guy fart into a microphone. Yeah, I just was like, you know, he was suspect of me approaching him to begin with and I think he was in his own zone there. And I he he looked at me with a furrowed brow like he was kind of like, what is this about? And I just was like, I just just huge fan. We've seen in concert a lot. And he just kind of was like, were you?

We might, you know, and he just was like, he just he did. He goes, that's what's up. But then he just turned and like hit a move and like, I was standing there while he was like rerun dance. That's the best guy. What's that? You should have danced with him. Yeah.

I just walked out. I felt bad and as I was telling him, like, excuse me, I get that. But then I just like walked away sheepishly. And I had this, it was just a bad experience attached to the song now. And so we went with the other song. What was the other song? That song was a great song,

Right Down the Line by Jerry Rafferty, which I'm glad I did it because that is a much more, it's a timeless song. I love it. It's a goodie. It's different, you know? Don't meet him. If you ever get to meet him, don't meet him.

Jerry? Yeah, he's in the grave now. Oh, he's dead good it's different, you know, don't move on if you ever get to meet him don't Jerry Yeah, yeah, he's very brave now. He's dead. Yeah. Oh good. Yeah Steelers wheel nothing. No, he was the this isn't pop He's thinking I don't I'm not a big I'm not a big trivia movie. Not a big. Yeah I know we got a break. I was gonna ask a break when you come on Next time we go unless you don't have it, but I'm wondering if you do you have a bunch of store You've gotten the opportunity to meet some like crazy people over the last decade And we talked about some of them, but I don't know how many Have you been disappointed by several people sure without even giving names? I'm saying sure people you're just like damn man They could have been so much better. I would say yes

Well, we have a long night together you're doing skanks tonight with us. Yes. And Sal's debut special, Terrified, streaming right now on YouTube 800lb gorilla. Go to Salvolcanocomedy.com because his new tour is starting in November everybody. All new material for all tour dates and tickets visit Salvolcanocomedy.com. Season 11 of Impractical Joker starts July 11th. Oh, thank God. How many episodes? 18. Nice. Big Jay's gonna be, he's on the Burt tour.

He's on the Fully Loaded tour. Let's push that board, God and the Funny Bone, the Richmond Funny Bone. Doing all fun things. Fully Loaded's doing fantastic. Get tickets though, they're not all sold out because these are huge places, but they're packed, so get tickets.

He's at the Funny Bone Richmond, Virginia, July 12th and 13th, and the Bergata by himself, one night only July 27th. Tickets and all that info go to bigjcomedy.com. This week I'm at McGoobee's. That's it. No! That's it, we gotta fly. No, you have the Gramercy Theater with the Regs podcast and the Portsmouth, New Hampshire and San Diego, and every Tuesday night, punchup.live slash Robert Kelly.