The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - No Skips

Episode Date: August 3, 2022

Jacob has a new Pandora playlist out and it's not getting as much love as some of the other playlists from the crew.Stream "The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson & Dan Soder" for 3 months free on the SiruisXM app! Offer Details Apply: www.SiriusXM.com/BonfireFollow us on all social media @TheBonfireXM@DanSoder www.DanSoder.com@BigJayOakerson www.BigJayOakerson.com

Hey campers, this is Big J. Oakerson. If you're listening to this, I think you probably know, but I want to remind you that the bonfire is also a radio show on serious XM. And right now, if you go over to seriousxm.com slash bonfire, you can get a special offer for three months free of serious XM satellite radio. That's a bargain, and you get to hear us live, and you get to hear hear the whole show So don't be an idiot. All right enjoy the show Oh, yeah And now the bonfire with big Jay Okerson and dance odor I like when I make DJ Lou groove Feelin it. He was grooving there. The bonfire everybody. Faction Talk Series XM103, Big Joe Gerson, Dan Soder, the whole gang's in the house.

Everyone's here. We're in the studio. DJ Lou is here. He's queer. Jacob Batad, he's here. He's queer. He's not going anywhere. Our Black King, the Blackad, he's here, he's queer, he's not going anywhere. Our black king, the black tiger, Lewis. John. Gay as hell. Christine Marie Evans, we all know.

Self-proclaimed, sexual deviant. Clamslamon. Clamslammer. Oh man. It's back to school, man. Sirius XM's doing all this back to school stuff. Right. That feel weird. We're like you're weird. You used to know it like you could feel it in your bones when you were a kid

Like we're going back to school. It's setting in And now you're like, oh, there's little fucking eight those little nuisances Finally, I have to go learn some manners. There's some sort of till it like what when you do the festival of being up for 10 days Yeah, it's like going away to camp And then come back and it's like all right back to work. Yeah, you know, I mean it's like back to the To the work I was gonna say this before me and Christine We thought we were gonna hook up in Montreal with this girl and then found that it didn't end up happening But we both came on complain that we both were good underwear

You guys just griped at each other like co-workers. I know I wasted these great underwear for nothing happening but we both came on complain that we both weren't good underwear. You guys just griped at each other like co-workers. I was like no I wasted these great underwear for nothing. Look I got my black stretchy on and she went I weren't thong and then we were like wow maybe we'll fuck anyway and then Josh was like no hang here I'm trying to get laid by this girl. He's actually really annoying. And then why was it what was it annoying. He's actually really annoying. And what? Why was it annoying? He's like, don't leave.

We're leaving. I wanted to go back and fuck my boyfriend. And it really was like, Josh was like, nah, Stan, I might go home with this girl. And Jago's off one cigarette. He goes, have four cigarettes. Yeah, that's got cares about you, huh? More, smoke six cigarettes.

Jumpin' jacks. He knows how to get me though. He's fatty burger He knows me though because then I'm smoking that first and I'm like I got five more Five in a row Not in a row. I'm yes, but No, but yeah, that's crazy You know you doodle around for a little bit. I hold none lit one for a little while that buys you a few more minutes I do some pointing with it some point talking with you. Did he get away? Huh? Oh

No, and then by the time we see you back we're like or hungry now we ate and didn't fuck All right, well true love. No, we got it in one time. We got it in the birthday Nice, you gotta give her old shout on the B day, you know what I mean? Well, you're supposed to suck your jack for an hour. No. Yeah, it's your birthday, it's your special day. No, it's fucking not with chicken nugget fingers. No, wait, you're gonna have slippery hands.

You know, like hold onto it like one of those water bags. No, we had a good session. We rocked it out up there. Yeah, it's fine. We're fine. I don't like the, uh, I don't like the connotation here that you guys are saying that me and Christine aren't doing okay.

I didn't say that at all. What are you saying exactly? I was just asking about how long Josh had mine. She doesn't make with the push enough. No, I was asking how long you sacrificed your time for Josh to benefit. Yeah, we really did.

It was a long time. I mean, it was like Brian Baldinger was there so he was fine and then I met this mother daughter team from Elevator. I talked to him a lot. They are a team. It's the manager and assistant. I can't say that.

Dude, hung out with a mother daughter team the other day. It's team. Ooh, I'm telling you. Put the daughter about the daughter. So the daughter's the assistant? Yeah. It's gotta be annoying, because sometimes you want to talk to her to the assistant.

I was definitely checking out this daughter's cans and caboose and then met her later that night when realize there was this lady's 19 year old daughter and you're like okay. All right. Then she smiled and I'm like, braces good. Good. My daughter's 19, okay.

Okay. Get of the dog. Mr. J. 19 okay Okay, get of the dog Mr. Jay mommy says another loud in the senior dirty comedy my body jiggles in over here. That's the outfit. There it is Well, no that's you duck up break. She looks very young I saw her going up an escalator to a comedy club So I was like from behind that was like whoof going up an escalator to a comedy club. So I was like, from behind, I was like, woof, and then she's wearing that half top.

And then it turns out she's a 19 year old girl there with her mother. Well, you shouldn't feel bad. Dane Cook just got engaged. Uh huh, to his girlfriend, Kelsey. They've been together for five years. So, Mausletoff. I've been, she's 23.

So since she was 18. Yeah, leagues. And he was 55. So, what? Society suck a dick. No, I'm curious what the hell they ever talked about. Probably didn't cook hay day. It's during your small child.

And I was on the fucking fire in Flegal. I love her Instagram page. Why? I've been following it for years. I would cut out his ears next time you Say that. So I might do a little self-editing Jacob and not say years next time. Just say whatever. Seven eight years probably Why is that weird? Why? Right now, I need the exact date. She's a married lady. She's older. Seven and a half years ago. I absolutely pulled punters. I was just churning butter to this. Oh, damn, dude.

She has hot dough, huh? Got one knee. The secret's out. God, is there all of this comedy, physical? Dink, cook, and iron, gauge. Yeah, it's everything. You know he's gonna drop on the knee. You know he's gonna get on the knee. He's gonna get on his knee.

You ever see someone drop a knee? You ever see the knee? What is the knee? They take the knee. They go with the down their knee. Kelsey's very cool. Her workouts are insane. She knows her stuff. I would slap a fucking if I heard you say that about someone I was close to, I'd be like, why don't you get a restraining order on this fella? Well, we're doing a comedy show. What do you want?

Yeah, should I not be content here Dan? No, you're right. She's under an I will cut. That's what I'm saying. At what point was she like breaking it to her parents or she goes, Hey, dad, do you know, Dan Cook? You love him. He's like, dad, I went to vicious circle. Her dad's like throwing the Sufi. He's like, Yeah, I went and saw him when we were mom and I were in college remember that guy who taught you comedy classes in the 90s When you were a student Oh, man, he fucking dang cook comes happy faces. I know it dude everything's too good for that guy I mean, but I mean that age difference is tough. Oh, at least they both stand in poses.

Well that's weird. That's a weird eyebrows. Oh he does something to his face. He's hanging on to it, what are you gonna do? Yeah. What do you want the guy to do? I didn't know what was, I would have loved to see what he thought was going bad.

Here, he did stuff. He's a good looking guy. Yeah. Very good looking guy. I mean like the hottest guy to everybody in comedy, to did stuff. He's a good looking guy. Yeah, very good looking guy. I mean like The hottest guy to everybody in comedy to every girl Do you know I mean yeah, I thought it was like the hottest guy so like but that's funny when you're like we're engaged Tell me 23 how many guys been together five years

Okay, what did you guys meet she's like right when I was 18 dude. He's like Elvis You just keep waiting for he's letting her ripen on the vine a little bit, you know what I mean? Yeah Yeah, he did stuff He did stuff to his face face. Don't lie dude, but where where was it going? I wonder that he was worried about But where was it going I wonder that he was worried about? He probably just caught those jowls right there in the fridge. Yeah, but one of those cool things was this, uh, what a queer statement. His eyes were so dreamy.

You can get lost them. And now he's got like crazy like, hey! He's got like old producer eyes now. You want to be in the pictures? Yeah, it's disturbing. He's got like old producer eyes now. He's like, you want me in the pictures? Yeah, it's disturbing. You want me in the talkies? Jesus.

Christine, you don't think he was a handsome guy when he was younger? Of course he was. Okay, settle down. But yeah, he's crazy. But that is crazy that when she tells her parents, and they're like, yeah, dude, we saw him live at the comedy connection in Boston

on like our third date. Yeah, because I'm gonna marry him. You know what I mean? Ah, okay. Like, downstream come true. Yeah, I met your mom at one of his shows. Yeah, I mean, there is, age-wise. For sure.

I don't understand plastic surgery. Like, say, you're saying you're said, okay, I need, I need a facelift. Right. But if you know, why would you say, pull my eye, browse up? Because he was seeing something in the mirror that bothered him. But they look, I don't know where to go with this question. I get what you're saying, but it looks like.

Is your question sort of like this, he know it's a bad job? Does he know that he looks worse for the wear now? But I also point it out. Or does he see it now and be like, ah, finally, they fix my handsome face. It's weird because with the two pictures face to face, it looks like Dane Cougan that looks like him going. Dane Coug looks... His face now looks like what happens if you did the face off movie and then returned faces back

Yes, it fits different. I think you wore it outside. Did you wear it in the pool? It fits completely Did you dry my face dude? Did you put my face in the dryer? Dude, did you do this on cotton? You made my face big dude dude no heat. I need a tumble dry no heat Dude, no heat. I need a tumble dry, no heat. He's a delicate, a delicate dry. Well, that's ruined. Well, I'll put it back on, see what happens. Is that just a bad job?

Or is that standard? Is that what they look like after you do a facelift? No, my step on the... Got a facelift and it looked great. I don't know what happened here with his eyebrows, because you think he'd have access to the best doctor's and Los Angeles. Is it that? And while he looks like that. Yeah, is it that big of a role of the dice when you get a facelift or they go like, happened here with his eyebrows because you think he'd have access to like the best doctors and Los Angeles.

It's that one while he looks like that. Yeah, is it that big of a role of the dice when you get a facelift or they go like, what's scary? They go, well, you're either going to look awesome or straight ghoulish. It's like they just took his, maybe you just got an eye lift because it looks like they just like pulled his, like, eye skinned. How do you react to that though if your friends with Dane cook, right? And then he walks up and you go, hey, you're eyes.

You know, do a couple more side by sides of him then and now, because I will say this, that's particularly not a good picture, because I mean, when this picture of him and his girlfriend on his Instagram, nope. Nope. You know, it looks better there. Yeah, I'm really just gorgeous. It's beautiful. You know, it looks better there. Yeah, she really has gorgeous. She is beautiful.

But I mean, I, I, I, I said my, my thing with it is, I feel like I went to sleep one night and then took a different person. That happens. You know, he didn't look like that. Brad, an oddball with him. Bradley Cooper. Uh, did I whack his face out? I write, does Bradley Cooper looks different than he did in silver linings, playbook?

Does he? Bring up that picture and then bring up what he looks like now. Face. Last YouTube site for this and he does in-depth dissections of what people did is Dr. Gary Lincolff. Lincolff. You will absolutely love this guy. So now bring up Bradley Cooper now.

It could be, I see it there on the bottom right, though, it does something's happening. Like currently. The bottom right underneath the picture the big picture All the way to the right looks a little funny there. What a handsome man. Oh totally Philly guy I think too I'm not seeing anything. Let me see I see what you're saying. There's a couple I could be one there's just something weird going on I'd be wrong it It might be age. All of a sudden, he started doing the elephant man

in New York City and I was like, yo, he was on Fallon and I was like, his face looks different. It might be age. You got to remember, too. People is the thing. If you're not Pete Davidson, or somebody who pops,

or the stranger things kids, do you know what I mean? A lot of people pop because they perfect their craft and kind of get popular a little bit. By the time, and let's hope something good happens, by the time that millions of people know us, we're gonna look very different in 10 years. Yeah.

Do you know what I'm saying? So the fleeting fame, so that's what you see, Bradley Cooper, you saw I got famous, probably close to 40. Yeah. And I'm hitting that right now. So now he's like in his mid 50s. Yeah, and I'm like in 10 years from now, like in his mid 50s. Yeah, I'm like

in 10 years from now, I'll be approaching my 50s. Right. You're gonna be completely gray in 10 years of the world knowing you exactly. Do you know what I mean? They're about you aged like shit. And you're like, I was just about to do it like dude, I hung in there till my fucking toes 50. Come on man. You watched it right as the belt buckled. I tell you, it was doing a great getting in the shape in his 50s now. It's Ralph. Gotta give credit where credit is due, man. Ralph, that's stupid running

and all this shit I make fun of him for. He looks phenomenal. So he's gotta trap his little fucking child, Brad. Yeah, Ralph's. Yeah, now it's time for the trap. I thoroughly thought they came up to visit me, Shannon and Ralph up in Montreal and they came for two nights.

That's fun. We did an SDR so they came into with the nasty shows and the worst. And it was really cool seeing them up there. But yeah, Ralph, man, it's just dropped. I think 70-some pounds. And he was never what you would describe as fat. He was a big guy.

He was bigger guy. And he was heavy for a while, I guess. But we were really hoping that was the trip we're shinin' in him fell in love. But instead Ralph went home and got deathly ill and couldn't go to a stone temple pilot show he was hosting. Oh, really? I mean, that's him before. So again, you say you wouldn't go like, what a fat shit in the picture. He just was like a big, like, ufish guy.

Yeah. I'm hitting my ufish stairs right now. And he's got, wait, Christina, something after, is it? I know, I know I'm joking. But like, yeah, he's got a good shape, man. He's running like insane distances. I would say insane distances I mean half a mile That would be that would be a distance to like if I do that every day I go all right

I hate everything about it, but I'll do it But yeah, I think he's doing like he does like 10 miles stuff like that like a couple times a week I think anything over Two and then he's right anything over two. I'm like that like a couple times a week I think anything over two and then he's right anything over two I'm like that's so much. I don't know if I've run straight for a mile ever you what more you run three I used to do five or six but now I just dropped a three but now I do Aside from my any lifting I do walking and sprints Okay, I walk four miles or five miles a night But then I'll sprint a few avenues here and there just you just take off

So someone's in their window and then they just see you fucking take off That's gotta be so great You're just in the story I was actually just in a story on your phone talk to someone like I know hold on what? This guy this guy came off Broadway and then just started That's gonna look insane. It's got I don't know where you know you just dark You're just walking around willy-nale and then you just fucking and with no warning anybody just blast it looks odd Walking one second and then not running. I mean full spread on the projects are you gonna get followed?

You can get chased and you think you sprint fast. Oh boy. You look at caught you will get caught man That is insane. Yeah, I I'm I'm starting to get o fish So like I got to start a Yeah, I'm I'm starting to get o fish. So I'm like I got to start a I'm a walk I gotta exercise. Yeah, I let everything go to shit. You walk four miles a night Up that yeah, I've been trying to do now. Yeah here Yeah, you just want the days to end you just get done work I'll just walk until I can't walk anymore and fall asleep immediately. I'm trying to get like back into like tip top shape. You're gonna be ripped right?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Jacob ripped. It's possible. It happens. I did drop a few already. Well, I wasn't in bad shape, but for me it's vanity. I got to drop about 15 to 20. We'll talk. I'm telling you. I'll tell you this, the hymbeos, the hymbeos, I think we've been talking, hymbeos are gonna turn you, they might turn you around.

You're making beefy. Justin actually texted me earlier. He wants me to be the first project. Yes, yes, love it. And by the way, why he reached out to you so fast, Jake was know this, and I know this to be true. You are an easy project. You are a couple of things away from slapping away pussy.

I'm telling you. And some of us going to have to be in your demeanor that you're going to let Justin work on. Remember you keep saying yourself, I wish I was more like Justin, personality wise. Well, you're about to have your opportunity. It's coming. It's coming through the hymnbo podcast. I yeah. Um, back. Also, uh, his, he has, uh, his playlist this week. Oh yeah, that was Jacob songs of love playlist. And I was told you'd like to go over something with us. The numbers. I I mean we always look at the numbers So you swore to your numbers. I want to see my numbers. Just think he showed Jacob It's a lot of effort into it though. Oh, I thought you knew the numbers

Pictures that you when you got arrested that was back in here. It's You're snorting crystal down in Florida. You don't remember that. Why do you have to make don't put the worst? Lou, what are you gonna say? Why you're gonna put the worst picture of me? No, it's, you know, Jacob, I'm just trying to attract people to go to the Pandora playlist site. That's all. At least if it's the songs of love, you can't put a decent fucking photo.

You're gonna put the fuller shop full picture of it. If any guy ever needed love, it's that guy, right? You said he is, he's not worthy of love? He is. Seeing this photo of me. I know it's a photo of it. It's not worthy of love He is seeing this photo of me I know it's photo of me I know it's photo of me Dan, somebody stuck my face in some hideous guy's body

I don't know what to call it And that's not hideous, it looks like you don't give a fuck And you live life by the seat of your pants Is that photoshop? Are you telling me that's a completely different person That's totally different person That's not Jacob at all, that's not phot that's a completely different person? That's a totally different person. No, that's not Jacob at all. That's not Photoshop.

It's completely different person. That looks funny. I'm telling you right now, that's something a real Photoshop. That's not a Photoshop. That's a real Photoshop. Please change that fucking photo. That's not Photoshop. I'm gonna promise you, I think that's a real Photoshop.

I'm taking that right now, if you agree to odd-thruple on site right now, the yogurt or some version of odd-th I know is that Jacob? I thought that was a real mochot I thought that's just a guy look like Jacob. Do you agree to odd sample? I think about how great an idea it is And then I think about the reality that I'm literally going to have to live three days. Yeah three with that's it We're gonna like he's gonna hate my I hate his habits and he hates my life. Right. So we'll take one of the four weeks off after you guys do it.

Yeah. So you guys have a little cool off time. Probably get some extra footage watching you guys cool off your confessionals. Yeah, we're gonna need a reunion show. When you really go, because, look, I didn't wanna say when I was there. I used to piss on loose pillow every night.

And he never budged. And also, I'll say it, I like the tuna cass to say when I was there. I used to piss on loose pill every night. And he never budged. And also, I'll say it. I like the tuna casserole. I tried it. It was good. Snack, not bad. After a couple days, I had some bite. I won't give it to him.

Let's look at this live list to see his numbers of Jacob's songs. And this wasn't a gimmick. I put my, you know, this is from my heart. I put the real deal into this. All right, toad. What's the highest range? One of the hours. The hours played, because what's the highest range? Well, it would be hours. The hours played, because that's the go up.

You want to. Eight minutes, 23 seconds of four or eight minutes. People average a total of eight minutes. Per listener. Per listener. Got you. Okay, so it was through total spins. Is that probably the number we're looking at?

Oh, it just came out yesterday, so. Yes, sure. Well, I don't know anybody else the spins have. Well, let's compare it to lose and yours. You want to look at the list of all of them. Okay. Tell me how it works, Lou. Break it down for me. There you go.

Who's leaving? So on this list, it's going to tell you how many listeners you had this week. And the average minute per listener? See, I believe without looking at this yet that Christine's list is probably number one because she picked really like cool popular. No, not at all. In fact, right now you are songs of love has the most play. Number two is Black Lose Becky sirens coming in at number three.

Jacobs leaving Neverland. No, those are in order of listeners because he Jacob's leaving Neverland. No, those aren't the order of listeners, because see this says 26 and 24. He's leaving Neverland. Is that thing up here? It'll leave anywhere. I'm over here. That's not out yet.

Black Luke, he's over, he's gonna use a computer. There you go. What? What is that even? There you go. In ground terribly. Big J's Christine turned that shit off is number two so really yeah look go go this is this week

yeah I'm number one yeah songs just came out and it just came out no it's this week's because the new thing so people listen to the new thing first that's how do you never know is how every comedian tells you they had the... Never won a album on iTunes. It's the week they came out. Because six minutes after it came out and all their family bought it, it's just moving the most. So what is, what's moving in that moment? So they saw 120 of them or 200 of them in the first five minutes and their number one on iTunes.

It's insane. And then they screen-grab it and they're like, guys, you did this. You made it number one. We are number one on iTunes. It's insane. And then they screen grab it and they're like, guys, you did this. You made it number one. We are number one. We are number one. I haven't made a playlist yet, huh? We did. Oh right.

No, I didn't. Did I? I had to shut off. Christine turned that shit off. Christine made that playlist. Oh, I thought you actually did that. Well, look at that nice picture of us though. Yeah, it's a nice picture. Well, that is a nice picture of us.

It's more than I get. Damn. Look at two people in love. Good picture. How are my individual songs doing? Um, let's go take a peek. Christine, if you would. Which song did you have the most faith in, Jacob?

Oh, that picture. Rool. Damn it, man. Which song did you get the most? Which song did you have the most faith in Jacob? That picture rules Yesterday I was aggravated. I hate looking at it By the way the Idiot We're talking about dude. You got so much pussy back there. You were selling math. Oh my god. Remember when you slept on that bear floor Oh, yeah, but Tachi 69 Started over Luke you me the beginning of that We used to play every time Jacob talked

Huh, this is a different song. Yeah I know, but I was the other one. We said that other one. Remember we had all thing. I like the Christine's familiar with Takaashi Six-nines catalog. I can't tell them apart Yeah, the we used to play every time Jacob talked it was a was it a gummo Come on come on, but black Lou school these white folk, please shows getting too white You guys don't even know gummo Takashi 6 9 by the way just goes to other countries now and throws money in the air

You got out and now it goes overseas and wears the she keeps and throws and pegs money at little shirtless shoeless kids People are drinking fucking like a puddle water. He's like here's a hundred thousand dollars They don't even know what to do. That's gonna destroy their life right They have no idea what to do is you realize that there's criminals in the area that will murder for much less Potachi it's a real guy About a man trying to dump LSD into the L.A. Water supply. Yeah, but it's not Jacob Told you use for this told you

That looks just like told you for this. Told you. So guy that looks just like told you. I think the photo ruins my list. Like I think you blew you killed my list. This fucking voting not at all. That photo. That photo. It was that photo draws people is hilarious. You made this this list I put weeks into a mock. This is a different guy. I made a mockery of my life. Jacob, if you don't want me asking, who's the New Orleans Saints players Jersey? You're wearing all that sick, dude. What's up, loady? Is that a Joe Wode? Yeah, Lodi.

Hey, Lodi. Hey, Lodi. What you got there? Is that a Reggie Bush for his small stint at the New Orleans St? I think the first order of operations for Justin and Josh with you is to get you some dreds, side dreds.

Side dreds, the most deadly dreds. The most deadly of all dreds. And it's like getting you in some corner. Change the pictures of Jake. Jacob has a fair shake at this playlist. I'm terrible send me something Jacob. Please. Jacob sent a lovely picture. Still of the video I made yesterday. How about the picture of Jacob as a gay cowboy? Perfect painting. Perfect. Okay, what are we got here? What's his hit?

Your completion rate is garbage. Well, I mean, I didn't think. I'm gonna have to go throw a list down today. Please. Show you guys what's what? Maybe I'll throw two playlists in there. Can I throw in two, Lou? Absolutely.

It's an early night tonight. I don't even care anymore. I could probably throw to go to playlists. I just did what was asked. Oh, no, I'll get them out there. Christine, why haven't you put pressure on me to make a playlist? I have. I know. That's the joke.

Yacht Rock, please. Summer's the most over it. Let's go. Yeah. I'll get a little Yacht Rock game, but then I'm gonna go. I'll give you a Yacht Rock play rock at League 2. I'll give you a Yacht Rock buddy. Can you choose me up? Yeah. And by the way, I'm fine with multiple Christopher Cross. How do I make the playlist? Just put down the songs and then black little make it. Just text them to you. Absolutely. Oh, parallel. You make notes, copy and paste. No, prop at all. And then I'm gonna make another playlist of some other kind of music.

Probably, I would just call it my fuck mix, but it's just gonna be deft tones, wipe-one. It's gonna be an album. That's gonna say, we need a J-Slam piece thing. That's all fucking hard corn and and death tones. Say what I could go back and play uh yeah Christina if you remember I don't remember every song on it.

I have the album but I don't know if we have anything we can put it in. Well we're in your PS4? Yeah we're PS5? PS5? Yeah, PS5. I actually can give it to the party. I almost said PS2. That's crazy.

Have you seen the loading times? Yeah, I'll play I gotta make that that mega mix did put your your ultra hardcore fuck mega mix on this is It's dated a little bit but it's Christine was coming over one night and I had to slap something together and it just came the muse spoke through That playlist was made in a minute. Yeah, the first night we hung out Well, there was no Apple music or Spotify and like that yet really so like it wasn't that I was I had to make it from the songs I had on my iPod which was like you made it on iTunes. It was an iTunes playlist

Yeah, I love iTunes playlists. But I used to go and yeah, I just I pulled out all these songs. I'm like, yes, yes. Yes. And then Christine felt like she was in a sexy vampire movie. I did. Can you call your sexy vampire playlist? I'll tell you the problem.

You want to hear a creepy thing? Yeah. I'll tell you a creepy thing is the song the one song well there's more than one song where Marilyn Manson but one of them. Be cool Christine. Is the song that's playing well not not the video that's a video for a song called but in the beginning of the song they play an intro of a different song called evidence and then it kicks into that heart shaped class of song. That evidence song is so sexy. And it's, but it's much, it's really, it's what she claims while that was,

that that scene is her being unwillingly penetrated in front of a crew of people. Raped. Raped. I didn't realize I was dancing around so much. She claims she was raped. I didn't realize I was dancing around so much. She claimed she was raped. Yeah, I was like, dude, I don't know. I'm willing to penetrate. I'm willing to penetrate in front of others who were unaware. People watch in sex, not into it. Four letters for that bad boy. What's that then right? Don't say things like that That's a heavy accusation you're making. I'm excited for you to drop two hot lists, dude

Yeah, mostly because I'm selfish and I'm excited to play Rocket league I might give you how long could the playlist be as long as you want dude Because I'll give you a monster of You want dude? Because I'll give you a monster of y'all. You know, it should be like, you should keep it to 15. You should keep it to mind your own goddamn business. You can't just stay out for a second. You should keep it to mind your own business

when it comes to this. I'm thinking that the mega mix is for me and you're not allowed to release it. Mega mix. Oh, I'm allowed. Oh, I don't care about the vampire fuckless. I won't think of the vampire fuckless. I'll make a current fuckless

because new songs have jumped into the mix there. But yes, Christine's right. It should be special my fucking Christine music should be special It is Oh See why we fucked and I never stop talking to him for one I Don't know but it makes me feel like the room was definitely like a dark red lamp was on. No, there was a gag guy sleeping in a bed next to us. There's a steam machine, there's like a humidifier on high.

And then Jay had to say something to Christine like, are you ready to change the rest of your life? Today's the first day. She went ahead. I've been new everything. I can't wait to drink the blood of the new beginning. And then I cut myself to my chest. Oh!

Oh! Oh! Get some of Daddy's juice. And then I was like, do you guys have mercy roads? Take your career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career career. I'm gonna suck it. Damn, what's up, dude? You did so good on the show. Curricure, you're gonna suck it through some duty for your world. Of course, dude. Here you go. Hey, go down to the hotel bar.

We'll probably be down in a few minutes. At least you have to do it. You go, man, where were you? Where was I? Where was I? Was I giving you the wine of my blood? I'd drink my sap, become my forest. The seed has been planted.

The love shall grow from it The goddess is smoking someone pulled up a Wendy Williams video She's turning in burn it dude. Yeah, you don't like it. I'm turning in burn his subjects Move it group. I'll make you play list tonight, Lou. Yes Got it. Can I see a quick number? Oh, sorry. We never, we're never, ever your numbers, dog. All right.

So there we go. Just trying to go. So you know, no one finishes one song. Glass night right now. Well, it says completions on the first. Completion rates, 42% water-loo sunset by the kinks. That's my best one. Die. Is that was glad is night? So That was your forcing fastball was glad is night

Okay, I'll say let me tell you something people no one people do not enjoy Christy McCall because three Completions only 11 times it was starting to go this sucks ass. Oh That's what I'm gonna see I'm gonna see completed spins That's a big deal and his one completion zero Completion's nine spins. Murrow Haggard. That guy's a racist seven spins. No one completed it. Damn 50% out in John Mona Lisa mad. One person. One person.ose. That's the one song that got half 50% 20 spins 10 listens Christ almighty You know you can't you don't want everyone to like every song

Some people like some of them. Yes Yeah, if anybody could like one of these songs would be great But if you like they liked everyone you haven't done your job You went to narrow. Let me hear the skips five skips four skips Five of seven skips six of seven skips. I wasn't expecting big numbers I was expecting a lot of skips. Wow Christine go to yours. I want to see what the difference is I think she did well I was expecting a lot of skips. Wow, Christine, go to yours. I want to see what the difference is. I think she did well.

Yeah. Yeah, we have a lot of drum circles. We have a lot of dumb people to say that, sure. All right, go down. Let me see some of these. 42% on Liz Faire, fucking run. 50% on Fiona Apple, fast as you can. No one's skipping on Fianc.

She was 15 out of 30 Any defranco getting a 60% skip a completion rate of 13% get completed Damn, damn wow, I'm surprised on fights. Fist gets 22% completion rate. These numbers are jarring everyone. Yeah Regina Spector get the fuck out of here. These playlists are just such ass. 13%. Your numbers weren't much better, Jacob. But, Jay, wouldn't you want me to turn all of this off if I had it on? For sure. But also everyone agrees with me. Everyone turns this off when you put it on. At a pure niceness, they all listen to the first song a bunch and turn it off immediately.

Whoa, Christine's fucking Rodondo. Rad Rodondo beach getting fucking heavy. Pleiit. Rodondo's killing it. 61% completion rate, 57% completion rate. I can't argue with this. Yeah, this playlist is holding strong, Christine. That was one definitely killed. Okay. Bad religion. 61% completion rate. I want to see the bar so I can go destroy it this week. I can't touch these numbers.

It's good numbers. It's going up. All everybody know. Story of my life. What a story of my life. Burrito. Story of my life. What a story of my life. Burritos. Story of my life. Burritos by Sarwar.

It's not though. Burritos is a great song. Yeah, then why does everyone skip it? I have no one completes it. Honestly, I've skipped burritos every time I've listened to that album since it came out. No, you don't skip burritos. I skip burritos. I skip burritos.

You don't skip burritos. Burritos is best. Burritos? Are you saying burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I skid burritos. I sk it by pocket. Hey Alpine. Skip. Hey Chris, Christine, what am I doing right now? Skip. I like it. That's a skip. That's a skip of the- Greetings, Arsacus. They're tortilla still to chicken and rice beans and some time salsa.

That's a good thing he's kind of staring at. I like it. I give it a pre-order. Because this is a burrito, supreme, no beans, extra sour cream. And don't fold it too tight so I can put some sauces. I'd like to do some heroin, eat a burrito. You know, we talk on Wednesday a little bit about sauces being a problem with delivery stuff.

Big problem. But I will say this also, Taco Bell. He's a black sauce. I'll say we're if Christine never complains about the earth and what we're doing to the earth to me. Yeah. And I understand, I need this as well. I need 70, at least, 70 packets of Taco Bell sauce in the bag when I get there.

I'm using under 10 total. I know, but you want a landing pad for your KCDF tacos. On the base of the bag, I get it. Safety first, dude. Don't you agree? Sir, I'm sure you talk us. Do you ever grab just like a couple of sauces? I am. I talk about what you fucking, when they leave for you to grab yourself, you're like, this is a mistake. You should have put these bins out. And I'm not going to save them. I'm going to throw all those extra ones out and then grab a whole new fistful again. I save them, is that bad?

I have saved them. Is that bad? No, it's not bad at all. I've put in probably more. I wish listen. I have some fire some hot some mild. I don't know what I'm feeling. I don't know what my chest cavity is doing. Keep a sauce. I'm real big on keeping a sauce. Sauce. I'm real big on keeping a sauce. I order 30 packets and I have in my notes to all drivers, please make sure they pack all the sauces and still shows up with like, I'm so happy. Because they really like, yeah, it goes.

It's fun. Because they really like, yeah, it goes. It's fun. Yeah, it goes. It's fun. This white lady, you wait, lady! Your stupid pea brain probably can't conceptualize how important sauces are. Hey, mate of savage!

Hey, mate of savage! To eat your little wigwom food, I'm going to need stuff to drown it in. It's called sauces. It's what we brought over the Atlantic Also special note build that wall also stop making me feel weird It's not me. It's not racist not my fault. Oh wait demilivato fucking up one of my newest jokes I have that I love oh no why what's the joke? Why don't you say the joke but Demi Lovato came out and was like I'm going by she her again She goes I'm so fluid. That's how fluid I am. So you know what maybe the joke gross Maybe I still back out that part and I had a little fucking little schmutz on the end

Oh A little what's that called a reprise when they come back? Surprise and then a little bit of a He go oh I got this joke and then you come over here surprise and then a little bit of a he go. Oh, I got this joke and then you come over here I got a little you think I'm zipping but I'm actually I got you look it over here and really Over here There it is run the corner I will joke so much you can't take that joke out of any are you getting excited for the special?

No, is it just still too far away? I got it. Are you getting excited for the special? No. Is it still too far away? I'm more like what I'm nervous about now is like I'm supposed to scout this place. I'm bad at like doing the organization R. He's doing great R. He's also won a lot of trips right now. He's a traveling man.

He's doing, he's traveling. And I know like he wants to take care of the stuff and everything but not his fault at all. But I'm bad at like, I gotta get everybody on a group thread and be like, hey, so you're the producer, right, for sure. You're the director and everything's like, in place and we have to go, yeah, I know,

I'm just bad at organizing that. I can't believe in my mind, I'm like, all right, I gotta get it up. I just said, I just was gonna make two playlists. That's 20, 25 minutes. What night is it, is it Saturday? It's gonna be Saturday. Yeah. And then, I mean make two playlists. That's 20, 25 minutes. What night is it? Is it Saturday? It's gonna be Saturday. Yeah.

And then I mean two shows Saturday. Yeah. Hell yeah. You really shouldn't have anything else Saturday. Are we doing bonfire Friday? Yeah. Saturday I probably won't have anything. Yeah, I'm not doing like an early podcast. We'll talk to Ari.

We'll do six and jump on Sunday afternoon. Yeah, I'll say what I think will be fun. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine.

I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine.

I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be fine. I'm gonna be funny. I'm going to fuck you all night, kind of energy. Yeah. I'm going to fuck you all night. Then you're going to fuck twice. And you'll be like, I am so sleepy.

How excited for breakfast for you? Yeah, if we go to bed really fast. I'm going to fuck you. I'm going to fuck you. I'm going to fuck you. I think you can't fall asleep for me. You're going to smash your face in the thro. I'm going to talk to a little bit.

Free to go all out. That's what you're going to do post-coilness. I almost broke my head. I'm going to be like, I'm going to fuck you. I'm going to be like, I'm going to fuck you. I'm going to be like, I'm going to fuck you. I'm going to smash your face in the thump. For the talk of a freaking girl out. That's what you got to do post-coil this. So most breakfast time, go to bed.

First one to sleep, champion. Last one to sleep throughout neck. You want to take her first break? She, her again. God damn it. I'm so on it. I'm so on it. Yeah, it stays. It stays stays. I winked at you when I said that

stays in the picture. I'm working on my wings. Do you work on my nose? Have you watched the off of you? Because you got to get your Bob. You haven't watched that. Yeah. Well, you said it started off shitty. Just the first episode, it's like me. And then by the end, it's really good. Okay. By the second episode, it's fun. By the third episode, you're gonna be in love. Just the first episode, it's like, nah, and then by the end, it's really good. Okay. By the second episode, it's fun. By the third episode, you're gonna be in love. By the fourth episode, you're gonna be furious again? I'm gonna say, baby, boobie.

By the fifth episode, you're gonna burn your house down. I'm telling you, Jay. It's insanity. It's the picture for you. Bubbles, you gotta love it. Yeah, we'll take our first break. I think it's done. Oh, look, it's Burrito.

Skip. Burritos. Skip. It's the bonfire. Skip Payless on this VHS. You've been listening to SiriusXM's bonfire. New episodes every Tuesday through Friday mornings and full shows always on SiriusXM