The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Oakerson Island with Mike Finoia

Episode Date: November 12, 2024

Some lost tapes of Jeffrey Epstein have surfaced where he talks about being great friends with Donald Trump. Filling in for Bob Kelly, Mike Finoia and Jay go through the dynamics of having an underage sex island. Jay was in Oklahoma for shows and stopped by the world famous Red Dog strip club. He hung out with fans and the talented ladies did not disappoint. *To hear the full show to go www.siriusxm.com/bonfire to learn more FOLLOW THE CREW ON SOCIAL MEDIA: @thebonfiresxm @louisjohnson @christinemevans @bigjayoakerson @robertkellylive @louwitzkee @jjbwolfSubscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ on Apple Podcasts to listen to new episodes ad-free and a whole week early.

And now the bonfire with Big Jay Okerson and Robert Kelly Straight maid Dickinson for life, dude. I'm sorry and also rest in peace to the late Paul Dano Deanna Sorry, and also, rest in peace to the late Paul Dano. Just died. Deano. Deano. Paul Deano. Paul Dano is the guy, the Riddler.

You know what I mean? Yeah. He's still with us. Still currently with us, everybody. I'm excited to check out David Gilmore tonight at Madison Square Garden. Oh, you're going, yeah. I think I'm going tomorrow.

Dude, I'll tell you, I want to give a shout to, uh, Cash or Trade. It's a website that doesn't allow you to sell tickets over face value. Like, it has, like, a ranking system, and if anybody tries to sell over, they get, like, flagged and you can't, like... They boo you? They digitally boo you? Boo. It's great. My buddy, uh, Brando owns the company, and it's killer. And, uh, I got a ticket for less than half a face. Is he letting you, is his wife sending you dirty pictures? Because this sounds like another commercial on being duped into because of... owns the company and it's killer. And I got a ticket for less than half a face.

Is his wife sending you dirty pictures? Because this sounds like another commercial on being duped into because of a pretty girl involved. If you use promo code theBONFIRE, no, I didn't mean to, I hope that's OK. But I was just saying, if anybody's looking for tickets for below face. Hang on, what's this?

I hear Jim McClure is freaking out in the fucking hallway. I was just trying to be nice and tell. Mike's selling ad space. I just wanted to tell you as my friend, if you're looking for tickets tomorrow night. It'd be great if you put it, I put in with, we always do them through my agency. I really wasn't giving an ad.

Mike's taking fucking side money. No. Side money. And if anybody's looking for CBD also, I can tell you. No, I didn't mean it like that. Oh, it's old side deals for no ya yeah Do they say they play I'm saying find the audio but look at the tagline the notorious sex trafficker found the former president to be sleazy nice Well, how about that, but that's like a good endorsement for that's something a guy trying to deflect. Sure. You know what I'm saying?

Yeah. It's like when Bill Cosby was being shitty to like Juan de Sykes and I thought it was funny that he was like, I don't know what you're saying, I speak English, remember? Yeah. And it was like, oh, what a dickhead. But then it's like, it's so great when it's like,

oh, you're that guy. It's like, yeah. It goes, I speak English when I do my rapin'. This is the, so it's Michael Wolfe who has the Fire and Fury, the podcast. Oh, I guess we're doing commercials for this guy. Now I know you have to give. What's the year that this came out? Well, I think this just dropped.

2024? Oh my God, he's not dead. Yeah. If you subscribe to the Patreon, they tell you where he lives. He died in 2019, it doesn't say where the page started. No, they were holding on to it. I think they were trying to drop a bomb bomb towards the end of the you know yeah

Countdown to wrestle it's always so funny. They try to release these things like holy shit I'm like isn't already 75 pictures of these guys like pointing to fucking tits together and shit Who cares well and also it fucking doesn't do anything. Yeah, that's every day. It's something. You know what I mean? You're like, oh, rich people are scummy, big whoop. Yeah, exactly. You know? Like, oh, I had no idea rich people were fucking depraved and scummy. If you're not mad at Trump doing this

to a handicapped reporter, then it's like, he's not gonna care about this. Listen, Fanoia, DJ Lou, Christine are all on the sex registry. It doesn't make me not be my friends with you guys. I had to tell you when we met. You made mistakes. You had to tell everyone in the goddamn neighborhood Hi, I just wanted to let you know Megan's law for no yeah

Everyone I'm Megan's law. Sorry Mike. I'm here about Megan's law. I'm here because of Megan's law actually By the way the picture of Epstein's my favorite the one they always use he's like he's got it He always looks to the side, he goes, I got a little secret. Doesn't it look like it said Coldwell Banker underneath it? Yeah, sold by Jeffrey Epstein at Beasley. I mean, that's what he was. He just looks like a real estate.

It's crazy to me that there's just hundreds of girls in Florida that just all have this same story. I know, finally. Of being paid $200 to massage or jerk off, but it was just so normalized. It was like everybody in school did it. Everyone good looking enough to get the fucking invite. If you told me for $200 I could have of age girls coming to my house to suck me off every day,

that could get me to Florida. It's the only thing that could get me there. You gotta make Florida worth it, I understand. Epstein was just looking at it, he's like, man, it is fucking, humid as shit down here and it fucking sucks I'm on a beach like another lizard in my kitchen Jesus Christ great great that fucking the man-eating alligators are outside well you know what at least I got a fucking teenage girl coming over here to jag me off while my fucking freaky fucking Natasha

from Bullwinkle fucking wife's walking around's like, after I do my after come piss on a snake in the toilet. Hey, who let you in? Was it my handsome wife? Was it my handsome wife, Gisleens? My Ron Wood looking fucking friend. Fucking Gilead looked like Ron Wood. By the way, she's one of those kind of uglies

that when they go back, you know she was down for the party. You don't look like Ron Wood. By the way, she's one of those kind of uglies that when they go back, you know she was down for the party. You don't look like that. And when they show her young, they go, no, she was young and beautiful. It goes, she was young and better looking than she was when she was, I mean, she looked like, fuck it, this is crazy. She looks like Moe.

She was very rich. She looks like an evil Martha Stewart. She looks like Tom Morello in a wig. She does look like a rolling stone though, kind of, right? Absolutely. That's like the inside sleeve of a Tattoo You fucking UK drop. What I'm most surprised by is when you look at this face of that woman, where do you see the window in looking at...

But when you see that face, where do you see the window in that face to go, hey, I really do like you and I want us to be together, so I gotta tell you something. Could you possibly farm out young pussy to come here and whack me off every day? Buddy. And she was like, uh, well, can you give me a day to think about it? Sure, take a day. I would like to know by Sunday.

Here's the thing, I think about that a lot. How does he find out, like, where do you enter that into the conversation? Now I say that with everybody and the whole thing. I go, when you see all the people that are there, I'm like, those ledgers, like those ledgers of the people who flew out there, it's like, I have to believe. And I'm, this might be wrong.

If I'm wrong, I'm wrong. I don't know the facts of this at all. I'm just saying, when you see a thing and it's like, everybody was, you know, it's like, fucking, of course it's like Oprah, Elvis's whole family, like everyone's like fucking. Bill Clinton's. Yeah, everyone, all these people were out there. You have to assume 97% of them were just like no we're going to our rich friends island and there's gonna be whatever there it's like yeah and by the way even

like you think more than these underage fucking 16 15 year old girls 22 year old hot chick prostitutes whatever the fuck they are like at this thing I can see getting that to people more goes guys you know since we're taking this dudes weekend out here mr. former presidents and whatever yeah you want me to get a couple of nice chicks? That doesn't even phase me on giving two shits about that. Because the idea, what's more jarring in the possibility is that like, could Hillary Clinton and Bill Clinton

and all these people be like, yeah, this is what we do. We hang out and then all the guys fuck the children and the girls have tea in the pool. You know, there's some cricket. We's a cricket game they got a handball court we got a nice handball court they have it a pool it's an infinity pool it looks like it goes off in the ocean we do a pig roast on the last night we do a luau and then in between there though it's like confused frightened women for their lives are gonna come in and whack you off while they try to use your own come to write the word help because they can't say that

loud they're always being watched. And after we hunt them. You may see a nine year old jump in the ocean but I mean you know the price you pay. That's what I'm saying. Man where do you, the freak flag fly when they say what your free flag like yeah how do you find the partners in crime it's like they had a child sex what do you call like a whole? fucking crew, you know Child sex ring child sex ring and you're like, where do you find any other person in the ring? That's the thing. That's what blows me away Like did they show it does like a 22 year old hot chick walked by and they go jeez look at her and Epstein

That's ago, that dinosaur? If you wanna see some, you know, lamb, I got a whole other group of, you know what I mean? Like, does they show, you know what I mean? They have to like, somehow like, lure you and then go, if you go, no way I'm going for a younger chick than that. Then he knows they're not a customer.

This is my one and done time here on this side. I've looked at a lot of videos of trans girls with humongous cocks Oftentimes just shooting loads On a reddit thread. It's never made me hard It's never made me bat around the idea of hooking up with a trans Woman or anything if it did I probably wouldn't say anything about it Like I wouldn't be like I wouldn't be like Mike Mike, hey we're on the road in Austin this weekend, like do you wanna like, would you be like finding

a couple of huge cop trans? That's what I'm talking about. That's what I'm saying. And then what if that was the thing where I'm like no. Jake would be like, dude you're a fucking good dude. He'd go, you should come back to my place sometime. I'd be like, oh we got everything, we got like shuffleboard, I got drums you can play, you can do,

and then I'd go, we can fuck underage girls, if that's your thing, right? He goes, I'm just kidding, that's not it. Like, you'd be like fucking wigged out if I did that, right? Like if there was underage girls there, who will the, right? I'm just kidding, that's not it. You'd be like fucking wigged out if I did that, right? Like if there was underage girls or who wouldn't the fuck was, you'd be the first person to be like,

get it out of here, I wouldn't do it. And you go, I don't know. On the off chance that you maybe go like, dude, it's kind of funny that you say that, cause I fucking love it. Are you fucking around right now? Because I do love that. Did someone tell you that I like that?

You get a text later that's like on WhatsApp. You get a text later. Jay doesn't normally text me on WhatsApp. He's like, yo, you know how you were talking about that? Yeah, now let's go get matching tattoos of Doberman heads now that we're part of this secret society. I've never seen that. With Greek names written under it.

He goes, what is this? He goes, oh, it's our pact now that we're the people. Yeah, we're the people who have sex with children and we have our secret society tattoo. I've thought about that. Why are secret society tattoos always on the easiest part that if you lift your arms a little bit, you're gonna see it? The movie Split, the last thing of the glass,

it was a movie Glass, the last thing of the Unbreakable Saga. The big twist in that movie was the girl who was, a spoiler alert, the girl who was the doctor the whole time trying to help them was actually part of the secret society that tries to subdue that there's superheroes in the world. And then when he's laying on the ground dying, it's Sarah Paulson, it's the first time you see her

reach down to like touch his shoulder and right out of the very sleeve, like the wrist sleeve of her shirt, you see the tattoo from the society, he goes, get it on your back shoulder, lady. Like why would you get in a place where if you accidentally roll your sleeve up because it's hot in the room,

so it was, hey, what's that secret society tattoo? Oh, I'd fuckin' somebody got it in college. But wait, that's just right. That's the sole of the foot tattoo right there. Don't get it on your wrist. The nexus guy did it Right. I branded their vaginas. Yes Exactly. Yeah, that's what i'm talking about vagina branding if you join my cult i'll be all i'll be carving into your upper pussy areas Yeah To be literally under my nuts Yeah in in glow inin-the-dark ink J mo

But I will tell you this don't worry the J and the first line of the M are coming off the same line So I'm gonna save you a couple of slices. Yeah, but the oh unfortunately It's gonna have to stand free. It's circle around it. Maybe oh, maybe the O's outside the J and the M Yeah, you're right about that because Keith Raniere from NXIVM did do that It was like a picture that you weren't supposed to realize it was his fucking uh, and by the way I love he did it too. He goes this is enlightenment or the top of the K This is these are the branches going to your soul the bottom of the K Your frequency is supposed to be up here like in a a, kind of like a D shape, top of the R.

This is nuts. When I was 20-something years ago. What is that? He goes, what is it, a picture of a fucking dojo? Yeah, it looks like a cover of a Dockin' album. How's he doing in jail? Fucking great. Look at that. I was thinking about that.

We're gonna get a bunch of fucking criminals, fucking tattoos. It looks like the Zelda. He's branding a bunch of prisoners above their dicks. This guy's good. All you gotta do is grow your pubes pro in and you can't see it. Dude, the KR, I don't know why I thought

that was such a cool design. It is a cool logo. It's not, that's not a cool logo. I mean, it's not terrible. It's not a cool logo when it doesn't, it's too all over the place, you know what I mean? You can't tell what it is. It looks like something that would be

with 10 other symbols on a mason's fucking wall or something, you know, of like a temple. Yeah, it's a good move too. We can't have an obvious day. Christine, if you ever push me to the ledge and I start cutting you, I promise to do it all in glyphs or things that are like my name or something. Armenian old font.

Yeah, old Armenian fonts. Do it in Wingding? You're gonna just do it in Wingding? Yeah. I was thinking about that. I'm gonna carve Kardashians in your back. What you were saying about, if you're not a pedo, but let's say you just think, okay, I'm gonna hobnob on Epstein Island.

Yeah. You land, and then it's like, oh, there's that billionaire, there's Trump, there's Clinton, there's that famous celebrity. Why are there 15 random 12-year year olds walking around with ratty hair? Boy am I glad I got you off the grid guys. I'll tell you who these are. These are children that we all have sex with. Now you cannot, but then we'll probably have to kill you because you're not having sex with children now that you know the dirty secret.

They have to stick out. Like if you don't, it's crazy. He goes, what are these loose kids? Yeah, it's too probably wild roosters and loose kids. It's actually You can't kill them If you don't fuck them it's actually a sign of disrespect to the culture. They help with the rat population. I would

Oh hang on. Here comes our sexy lovelies now. Oh hello. Hello young lady. Have you met the president? Mr. President, rubber belly, please. Okay, okay there, girl. Do you want a saxophone? So low, low to bare.

If I saw him, he'd be trying to swim back to the mainland. No, you wouldn't, dude. If like I'm saying. When in Rome. Yeah, would you just have burned the motherfucker down? When in Rome, dude. I'm sorry, there's no planes leaving. Not me, dude. What do you do? You're stuck here. You just do it? You have have to watch I would sit there and get whacked off while getting a massage asking awkward questions

So I go oh your favorite class You got any pictures trapper keeper that's cool. Do you excel more in sciences? You guys still use colored pencils Apparently when we go on ship rocked we're gonna go by Lucid, we're gonna go by the temple But it's not blue and white anymore It's not all cool anymore They painted it I always thought about this when I'm alone in a casino

Like I'm doing whatever, AC for a week 20 years ago when I was in Vegas I was talking to a girl She was wearing a sweater, fucking jeans Didn't look like a prostitute at all But I started talking to her and I was trying to fucking work her I was talking to a girl, she was wearing a sweater, fucking jeans, didn't look like a prostitute at all. But? I started talking to her and I was trying to fucking work her. I was single, and she goes, well I'm working right now. She didn't realize that you were there prostituting.

Yeah, I was tooting. You guys are both tooting. I'm like, oh, you work for fucking Big Ron? And she's like, yeah. You're the new kid? For $500 you can fuck me. He goes, for $300 you can fuck me, so I'll give you $200 and we'll just fuck.

Yeah, look at the buffet. But she started talking, she was telling me For $300 you can fuck me, so I'll give you $200 and we'll just fuck. I think that works out. Yeah, look at the buffet. But she started talking, she was telling me she's a prostitute and I'm like, wait, you're a fucking prostitute? I'm like, that's crazy. You said it like that? Yeah, I did.

I was like, come on. You gotta say working girl or something. You only ask the guys, because you're a lady of the evening? You're a singer? Yeah, I go, I never went to a... Whoa, six from Mua! Gagagagi! She goes, well Jesus, I mean yeah, but I'm like, no thanks, I never went on. Whoa! Six from Mua! E-g-g-g-gee! She goes, well, Jesus, I mean, yeah, but I'm like, no thanks, I'm not interested.

From that point on, I was kind of like, if I was looking for a hooker, I don't even know how to approach one to go like, excuse me, are you someone I pay to fuck? I can help you with that. But how, can you tell right away? Can you tell right away? Now I think it's hard. Well, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I think it's hard. Well, I start a street walking prostitute. I'm talking we're in the casino and there's being no no no no no I mean, I guess I have looked and been like at the time

We've been walking back into the hotel. I got a skank fest night. It's like Two in the morning, and it's like kind of like it's sort of like empty. Yeah, especially the last night It's like I came home like crazy. It's like super empty in there really except. There's like kind of like it's sort of like empty yeah, especially the last night. It's like I came home like crazy It's like super empty in there really except. There's like one like Big titted lady like walking around like super made up by herself. You're like oh, she's worth of course of course But like say you're looking for one right and you want to go like find a Chick I have no idea how I would even like pick one out of a like all the other chicks I feel like I'd go up to someone's fucking wife and

Go like are you a hooker? Cuz you kind of look slutty, you know she goes she goes no No Everyone's over if you got the right money. I've never I've never approached. I only go I've never walked up to one I've only walked up to couples and make indecent proposals But I also do I Walk around around and give low ball indecent proposals. It goes, for $250 I would like to, I don't know, have your wife like lay with me and tell me it's going to be okay the rest of the night.

You put a leftover bag from a steakhouse in his hand? That half a T-bone's yours if your wife's mine. Low ball indecent proposals is fucking great. I'll give you my coupon for the steak, the all you can eat shrimp buffet at the Binion's if your wife can just watch me whack off for a little bit. I got a shampoo bottle with my butt's name on it. That's great. I have two unopened complimentary water bottles in my room.

If your wife will fucking spit in my face when I come. Lowball, indecent proposals are fantastic. That's great, dude. That's so funny. Do you want to hear this? Hey, I'll give you guys $30 worth of what's left in my mini bar if you guys want to come up there. And if you could yell at her while she fingers my ass.

But all the indecent proposal things that she has to do are just lowball dog shit things. I need her to fold my clothes while I'm clubbing. You don't have to sleep with me or anything. You don't have to have full-blown sex with me, but maybe some sex-related oddities. Dude, I wanna try this. Yeah, he goes, hey, would you mind hanging out down here

and for 50 bucks, can your wife go pee on the window of my hotel room while I whack off on the other side? Watch me whack off. Man. Watch me whack off. Man, watch me whack off. Look at her dad. Wow. She's 87. That guy's got some real fucking,

that guy's got eyebrows of a guy who says a lot of suggestive things and then makes his eyebrows go up and up to make the point he's making. Yeah, absolutely. He goes, honey, say we go back to my place and have a little fun. I can't do it good.

But that guy's got perfect achach cha-cha-cha eyebrows really does He says inappropriate things and waggle and wiggles a fucking cigar while his eyebrows go up and up He goes would you ladies want to sleep over at my place today? And by sleep, I mean don't sleep Of course The good old days when you can have a child island and no one's fucking pulling their phones out Right, of course he is kids Look at who he's married to that fucking bowl of fucking cream wheat over there fucking phones have ruined everything

private island underage sex orgies Concerts Cell phones is really ruined be getting away with pedophilia and concerts And I think that fucking sucks. No one's talking about it. No one's running on the fucking uh, no one's running those platforms Yeah, I lied to my parents all the time and I never would have been able to with cell phones I was always sleeping over people's houses that I wasn't actually at If they had cell phones, you wouldn't have got molested by those people who told you to lie about where you were staying. I never would have got arrested for stealing.

Hey, you know my name? My name's Galeen Maxwell's dad. Hatch, hatch, hatch, hatch. Look at his dumb stupid- You ladies wanna massage a log? Look at his dumb stupid cartoonish bow tie too. I know. Look at his wife looks like a fucking cartoon that someone dropped a piano on her head. She looks like a human fart. Yeah.

Look at that face dude. His wife's dating DeVito's brother. She's got mug of coffee face. That's when Galee Maxwell was young. Now you'd have been you'd have been happy to fuck her after this. Sure. When you met her here. The problem is as you watch her age and turn into an old lady who yells at black children in the neighborhood. She was very pretty in 87 though. No, no. I've never seen it. How old was she? I've never seen it.

She peaked in 87. 88? Horseshit. Becoming a nasty madam will do that. Yeah, I'm sure watching the souls leave a bunch of children's bodies will fucking give you a wrinkle or two. I would love to get her... My guess would be she's sort of asexual. I guess that she's asexual

She just kind of like I'll help you do your thing. She probably got off more in the power stuff Yeah, she probably gets all jizzy about money. I'm saying something her thing was just kind of like yeah I'll live this like he will continue to help me live this lifestyle. Yeah, she parties I'm sure she could was able to fuck whoever I'm sure I'm sure he wouldn't care nor would he believe that somebody else was desperately Wanting to fuck her if there was no money exchange where she wasn't paying for it at all if someone was like there's a guy at the gym who says he really finds me sexy he's like good by all means like really he does has he seen you sweat in your boy hair give him yes he's seen that

even though you keep shaving your legs, there's always something there? Yes. Give him the garage code. I don't care. Yeah. Does he know that your name sounds hilariously like Jizzlips? Yes. I don't even think... She's not even like his girlfriend. No, they work together.

She was his assistant. He described her as his best friend. She was just pleading. She's like, maybe if I get him young girls, he'll fall in love with me. Dude. So you know how like I'm sitting at like... Well, Christine, you want me to fall in love with you. You sitting at the cellar.

I tried. It didn't work. You sit at the cellar. Underage girls? No, just young girls. You never brought me underage girls. I brought you young ones. Jelaine Evans. Jelaine Evans, yeah.

Your best friend. You got to just call her your best friend. You didn't bring me anybody. You brought me. It is so weird thinking about that Diddy party shit. Imagine if you were just at one and shit was going down. If you're young and Diddy walks by, Chappelle at the cellar would go, we're having a comics party.

You're coming, right? And it's like, yeah, I'm here. Thanks for inviting me. I never went because I felt like it would walks by. Chappelle at the cellar would go like, we're having a comics party, you're coming, right? And it's like, yeah, I'm here, thanks for inviting me. I never went because I felt like it would be weird if I went. Oh, I've said this in Ozzie at this point now, but I'm saying about the P. Diddy party, I'll go, I'd be at all of them. If he was having another secret one tomorrow, I'd go.

If he was like, you wanna come? I go, of course, now that I know what's happening there, yes, I wanna see all of it. Do I have to bring my own baby oil now? Yeah, no, but that's what I'm saying. But I'm saying, if it's like that, if he goes, he goes, well baby, if you come, you gotta help Meek Mill face-fuck Justin Bieber.

I go, oh no, I don't wanna do this stuff. I just wanna like see it all. Just wanna watch your TV. Yeah, I wanna smell it. You still got that fish tank? I wanna know what Justin Bieber getting butt-fucked smells like. I don't think you can just watch.

Huh? You can't just watch at a diddy party. Well, sounds like someone's been there and said he tried that before. You can't just watch at a diddy party? You're not allowed, huh? He goes, Christ knows I tried. It's like an operating room. It's like an operating room.

Observatory? Observatory for fucking salt. I want to go to the observatory. Oh my god, that's Foxy Brown getting skull fucked by the roots. If you did nothing on Epstein Island if you just you saw what was going on and you locked yourself in the room And the next day there I didn't do anything Well, who's gonna believe you dude? Yeah, that's right. No, totally you're Yeah, girl, I think the the girls when they came forward

Which is probably tough as shit, but those documentaries, when those girls came forward, I think they were always pretty big to say people that did not. But I bet there's gotta be a point where some girls just like, yeah, they all just became faceless fucking demons to me at that point. No, no, for sure. But I think some of them are just kinda like, no, I know, but you do know if it's those ones too,

these boogie men. So I think there were some people, I think maybe it was Clinton. It may have been Bill Clinton that they were saying, like, it's like, no, I never saw him actually do anything inappropriate. They just hang out. They were just hanging and stuff.

So it's like, okay, maybe. He was there to play tennis. Well, here's the thing, also maybe, is like, also that guy, by the time he was hitting Epstein Island, probably already learned, like, only fuck people that keep their mouths shut. Yeah. You know what I wish?

I wish that my successful friends had islands that didn't involve kid fucking, just other fun shit to do. You know what I mean? Imagine like, Chrysler Island or something, or Ari Island, nah, Ari Island would be terrible. What are you talking about? There'd be no running water.

Ari's currently on Ari Island with Bobby Kelly. Everything that you touched at Ari's place would be just like laced with his piss and DMT Okerson Island. Yeah, it'd be a fun island Oak Island Oh, okay, I would be would be great You would have there's there'd be so many flat-screen TVs with PS 5s at like outdoor poolside Yeah chairs, right right and you just have like I'd have a bunch of underage girls, but I would wake them like a cruise ship I would make them wear pins that tells you what they... Washi, washi.

No, I would say what their age is and the age of consent in their respective country. But it would say it in their native tongue. Is that girl over there dildoing herself 12 years old? He goes, she's from Thailand though. You don't understand, in Thailand this is actually... She's a grandmother. It's actually rude to not look.

If you don't look, it's actually kind of rude to their culture. You want to get bamboo under your nails? You watch that child masturbate. Is this the video? Have you played the audio of this yet? We have not played the audio yet. I can rip it, too.

This is again to remind you. Grip and rip. This is Epstein saying how tight him and Trump are. Look at my ads now because I look at the Trump store. Yeah, you love it. The Trump store? Oh, yeah. Is that Trump's cubes?

I don't want those. Yeah, it's a whiskey ice mold. Oh. Fucking crazy. Okay, the Trump store? Is that Trump's a cubes? whiskey ice mold. Crazy. Okay, here it is. So you probably know he has scalp reduction. What's a scalp reduction? That's when they they pull your your your forehead down for your male pattern baldness, so it looks like you're Receiving less what a vain fucking thing to get hair transplant shave your fucking head What the fuck who's talking or saying I don't know who the fuck who's talking or saying. I don't know who's saying what about who.

Who's Michael? I don't care anymore. Guilty is charged. Michael Epstein. He goes, I don't feel like listening to it. Who do I hate? I thought it was Jeffrey. Michael Epstein.

Michael Wolfe is the guy interviewing. Yeah. Seriously, Michael, how often do we have sex with her? What? I don't know. Go back. He said it's great. What's it like to be married? What's like to be married

It's great. How, seriously, how often do we get checked? I mean, don't you worry about it. We can rule out his flow. I know, it's like, it's just my boy. Yeah, you can turn this off. Who cares, it's born. And imagine like right when we shut it off, it's like... I know.

A pure confession, no one ever listens that far. I mean, is this like rich guys talking about cheating? It's like, people don't know the world right up there Does it say it up there explosive tapes recorded by? It is so fucking claimed intimate knowledge of his proclivity to cuckold his best friends according to explosive tapes Oh, so he's talking about fucking his friends wives. Oh shocking oh Crazy Epstein you wanna come over and bang my chick

You want to fucking take her for a little spiff free I got it, but you hey oh Stu gots craziness Craziness indeed um this weekend. I want to tell you I was in um Oklahoma City Great club yeah, you said club City, great club. Bricktown Comedy Club, such a great club, yeah. Shout out to Bricktown Comedy Club and the whole staff, very cool.

I always went down there, because of the documentary, I think you watched it first, were you the first person? I did, I watched it and sent it to you. The Red Dog, now it's where I always do my meet and greets after the second show is I tell everybody go to the Red Dog and a bunch of people go over. Sick. And we go in. It's such a funny play.

It's great, I love it. Because it genuinely is, even though it's not what it was, and I don't even mean that in a good way or a bad way, it's just not the same inside structure, it would seem, same outside. But the inside's not what it looked like obviously in the documentary at all when the 70s and 80s and shit right right but It's still like it's for a strip club dude. It's like Roadhouse It's more

Bar than strip club, but there's tons of strippers there really yes They have now this is the funniest thing in the world. So they have four, they have eight to 10 pool tables. Which is pretty cool. Yeah. Shot pool both nights. One set of the pool tables though is in front of a room that,

it looks like where the pool table should be. It's like a room that's just got like wooden, like poles coming down But clear to see through you know I mean it's like a little tiny pole. It's just like I don't know why it's not a wall It's just every like foot or so there's another Thin pole and that's where they do the lap dances in a room. That's completely dark Really yeah, it's like just dark. dark, but it's not like lit like anything sexy lighting in there of any kind or any kind of lighting.

It's just a dark room and they go in there and just like dance and this place, some hot chicks there for sure. But it's also, no, Oklahoma City for sure. But I'm saying this club, there's some hot chicks, but there is no hiring consistency whatsoever. We could be playing pool and you look into the lap dance room, it's the place where they're going to have their tits out and shit. And just a girl putting her ass on a guy's lap and then leaning forward and her tits literally flaps, dragged across her upper thighs and then got past the knees and just

went down almost to the floor. But not like big titties, like dragged across her upper thighs, and then got past the knees and like just went down almost to the floor. But not like big titties, like two socks. Like car wash fucking, like car wash flaps? Noodles, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Car wash noodles. Well there's an ass for every seat, dude.

It was fucking wacky. Wow, I can imagine the bad is bad in an Oklahoma City strip club. Oh my God. Time is flying on the show. Yeah, we're having fun. I know, well I wanted to- What's that? Yeah, what were you gonna stop? No.

Oh. Everything just came to a screeching halt just then. Everything good? I saw the time over there and I was like, is that possibly right? No, just five, no we're gonna be like five, like three more minutes, so. The thing I wanna tell you about it was one two a couple of stories from the red dog

I may have some more the rest of this week if I think of some stuff But the things were funny was one there's a stripper kept talking to us with a black eye and Braces also like a shine is not what oh yeah big old Shiner But it was funny you know the old to tell a joke. We're like he's like great She doesn't let or she's, great, she doesn't listen, or she's seeing somebody or she doesn't listen. And I bought the kid Caleb, who was hosting for us, I got him a lap dance from her.

I go, I got you a lap dance from this girl over here. Now, she already has a black eye, so she's learned. Don't worry. You will get the whole song. She's learned her lesson, she's not fun. I saw that, I saw the old Roadhouse move If you remember from the movie the original the only Roadhouse the only Roadhouse, you know, you liked her tits man Yeah for 20 bucks you can kiss them and then he reaches over he's squeezing her tits and then he goes

Hey, man, you're gonna pay the money or what? He goes, oh no, he goes you're gonna kiss him or what? And he goes, I can't. I ain't got 20 bucks. And the guy punches him. There was a guy back in that weird little polls room while we were shooting pool that got, he finished three full dances. And I think they got nervous at one point to go like,

hey man, that's 60 bucks. And he was like, oh, I don't have any money. And he just fucking aggressively threw him out, which was funny. Bouncers came and threw him out. Oh yeah, process. Big bouncers, like big like, like. They don't have any money. And he just fucking aggressively threw him out, which was funny. Bouncers came and threw him out. Big bouncers, like big like. They got a big bouncer.

He was a fan too, which was pretty neat. Big, big dude. Yeah, he was a big boy. I picture like a perm and a tucked in polo shirt into some Jordache jeans. No, the guy was like jelly roll size but taller. And thin, not like heavy like that, but a big guy. More like, more heavy than he is like jacked muscular, but but a big boy like a hacksaw Jim Duggan. Yeah

Damn I've got I wish I would go there so bad. It's great. So then uh Second night we go there We're hanging out having a good time Second night was There's such funny things here, because I had a fan, everyone by the way that came I think was very sweet, but everyone was drinking, and so I get it, I welcome that situation when I'm doing it, but there's such funny tropes of those.

I had the guy who kept coming over, he said Jason, his name was Jason actually, sweetheart, sweetheart, but doesn't realize, because he's drunk also, that he's come over to me 700 different times. Instead of just like bullshitting. Yeah, he's come over individually 700 times and keeps going like I'm not gonna buy dude I don't want to bother you. You're just the best dude, but I'm fucking I'm so sorry And then his wife would come over and be like you want to do a shot with us or something You'd be like sure I'll do a show he comes up man. I told her not to buy god damn it, man You hate this and you're just yeah ah man, we're fucking up.

I'm fucking up right now by you talking. So we spend all of our time with me going, buddy, you're not bothering me. I came here to hang with everybody. This is bothering me. And he's like, ah, I'm fucking up. And he'd leave and he'd go sit down and I'd be like, hey man, I got you a shot.

And he gets up like, ah, and now I'm taking shots from you, I'm costing you money now. Dude, I'm a piece of shit. It was that. About an hour later, someone comes over to me, Yeah, now I'm taking shots from you. I'm costing you money now. Dude, I'm a piece of shit. It was that. About an hour later, someone comes over to me, they go, girl just fell out. I go, stripper? They go, no. They think it's one of yours. And I'm like, really? And I go over and it's that guy's girlfriend is like down on the ground. Like they're all like around. They're like, you okay? Oh no.

And then we were going to leave. And we realized it was was daylight savings. We're like, oh, this is awesome I got a whole new hour. We're gonna have so much stuff. Yeah, and then I was gonna get a free hour. I go hey to the guy. Let's get out of here. I say let's get out of here phones everyone's phone starts going off tornado Warning they said it's not a watch and they know there they go We can't go anywhere and I'm like really they go can I go anywhere then the guy opens the door and he goes you want to hear this Have you ever heard a tornado siren? I'm like no and I went outside. There's like

Telling everybody get inside so we had to hunker down for an hour at the Red Dog after hours girls Not putting on the characters anymore It's just a bunch of Santa Claus's with the beards off. Dude, it was, I mean, really, just like everyone's sitting there counting their money. And like, because by the way, there was eight customers by the time we left only. Just counting hot, sweaty, glittery singles. And they're all from there. They're like, yeah, tornadoes come. Probably ripped my grandma's house off. By the way, tornado killed several people that one

It was several tornadoes happening out there, but six miles six miles from where we were Deaths and stuff from it. We got through it dialed back And then we got in the car and it was torrential rain, and then I was like you're not gonna get out of here Leaving in the airport and for the airport in three hours from being back at the hotel Wow You left like no problem. No problem. They're used to it. Yeah, they're just used to a tornado alley leaving the airport in three hours from being back at the hotel. Wow. You left like no problem. No problem. They're used to it.

Yeah, they're just used to it. Tornado Alley. You know what I'm used to? Spending great time with my friend Mike Fennoyer. Love you, buddy. Because he, if you would've spent time with him, guess where he's gonna be? Nashville.

Zany's in Nashville at the lab at Zany's. November 15th and 16th after that, Bloomington, Vegas on the deck and comics Mohican Son of New Year's Eve for tickets and all that's his headline New Year's Eve fuck yeah dude for tickets and all info head to punchup.live slash Mike Fennoy and check out his new podcast are we old it's with him and Charles McBee on YouTube or wherever you get your podcast Bobby Kelly you know he's gone this week but it doesn't mean he doesn't do comedy ever he does he's

got Wichita coming up November 15th for Smith's Fort Smith Arkansas November Bobby Kelly, you know he's gone this week, but it doesn't mean he doesn't do comedy ever. He does. He's got Wichita coming up November 15th. Fort Smith, Arkansas November 16th, and after that, Mars, Plains, New Jersey, Beacon, New York and Kansas City all on deck. And catch Bobby every Tuesday, 7pm, Fat Black Pussycat, the Comedy Seller, PunchUp.live slash Robert Kelly. Austin this weekend, it's already sold out. Me and Fanoia will be there, but I have Louisville after that and I promise you, it's already sold out. Me and Fennoy will be there but I have Louisville

after that and I promise you it's not sold out. Houston and Philly also probably not sold out. St. Louis for that fact. New Year's Eve where we're doing Legion of Skanks the Dojo comedy. Assume none of those are sold out and buy tickets ASAP. BigJComedy.com we'll be right back or maybe not. If not I'll see you tomorrow.