The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Opening Act Groupie

Episode Date: December 19, 2023

Bobby's opening act has a sexy groupie who could care less about the headliner.

I'm Bobby Kelly and it's Big J. Ocarson. We're actually a full radio show on Series XM, not just a podcast. For full episodes of the Bonfire, you can listen on the Series XM app. Go to seriesexm.com slash Bonfire for a special offer. And now the Bonfire with Big J. Ocarson and Robert Kelly. You know this is Jacob? He's muted. Starting off good. Let me see.

Give me a second. I know the song. Big booty, a slap. She hit the flow. Low, low, low, low. His name, Jacob, you should know this because his name is after your favorite place in Low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low low Slow Rider I just got that now got that right now that makes sense if you don't know I heard him on Howard Stern once so I know the story But you have Florida slow rider And I tell you a

Thing was did that made me jealous. She the thing that who did? Lewis yeah when you had DMC and And he was he was talking about some of his lyrics and he was he was saying a verse from his lyrics and I was watching on I was watching on zoom Lewis was was miming the lyrics along and then he went at the end of the lyrics He sort of note he did he did some air button press Like everyone like he knew that that's what came after that that verse

And I was impressed with his knowledge and I was jealous that I had no idea why he pressed an air button at the end of DMC's verse I don't know what you but I felt But I mean it was as natural as as breathing It seemed. Yeah. And I didn't know why he pressed the I felt like unformed about life. Whenever he does is when he comes in and does his lyrics, I usually know the it's pretty the most popular ones usually does.

So you didn't you didn't press an air button. Lewis did. Well, I was talking to that. It was weird. Fair buttoned. I'm saying more. it's not so crazy. Black lose, not so cool for knowing the lyrics. It's your right. The acknowledgement is more.

It's some more of a note on you for not knowing the most popular run DMC lyrics. Yeah, I thought he's pushing a button like, and I think everyone should know to push the button there. I'm sure we all knew. But I had no idea you pushed an air button there I want to I want to push a button right now Hi Jacob holy shit

I derailed it You can't eat really show from the beginning can you? No, it just means we're going that way It's just a Jacob's talking about some crazy shit. Jay's putting a tea bag on his eye I don't know what the fuck's happening right? Yeah, it's a stizzy brewing over here. Christina doesn't hair up like a school teacher. It's kind of hot I don't know what's happening. She's got a weird lung island sweater on. She's looking good. What's going on? She's feeling fine She's feeling fine. What do you think it's in Florida? All is right. All is right. Jacob someone to the gun range today Who really would you fire off off do you look off some shots

Yeah, a little little hand get little 9mm Little little rifle action to just not your knuckles After your shot a gun to get that gun powder in your nose you're dirt ball. You're red neck Do you rent the guns that you're red neck. Blood is a lead afterwards. Yeah. Do you rent the guns that you have guns down there? Oh no, the Batot family has an arsenal down there. Really? Of course.

You dad's got a few pieces? Well, it's my brother's house. But your brother's strapped up. It's for the iguanas. It's the family uh... stash for for when the war comes with the wars happening jayke of

get those over to the uh... the gaza strip i went to the gun right at the gun show two days ago but i'm actually went saturday night to at the uh... improv did you what's up kelly bobby murdered Oh, it's right. Jacob came to your show. Hang on a second. What's up? Yeah, he came to the show. He came with his brother and two other dudes, two of the other guys. My CEO's a friend.

The campaign CEOs, big players in the canned champagne business. It was great show about one of Jacob. I'm an answer to great show. What's he gonna go? He goes, Bobby, it wasn't Bobby's tightest. No funny. No funny. Well, no, he was great. And there was a moment that I particularly

listed out to me if I made Bobby. But are you made, Jacob? Go ahead. Respect. Well, there was a very, she was, she was cool. But she was, she had a loud voice. She was, Oh,

Oh, Bobby psychoanalyzed her in five seconds. And he said to her, you've never, you've never said sorry in your entire life, have you? And her entire family, mom and dad, behind her, all cheered for him in unison. They know her. She was just fucking loud. She just rode a loud, you know Did she mean well? She was fine.

She was fine. She was fine. She was all right. She was all right. She was fine. But she just, you know, it's like, she said something. She just asked a question. It's like, bitch, I'm getting to the answer.

It's called comedy. Yeah. I give a set up and then I give you the answer after, you know, the punch line is the answer to you when we move on, maybe ask a question if I didn't cover it. Yeah. So she said something and she just was like, fine, dude, you know, she was just a guy, just a dude, just a real dude of a chick. Yeah, hey, let me, let me say something like,

we'll relax, settle down your tone. It's bugging me, your tone is bugging me. I'm married, I don't need you. Yeah, I need tone. I mean, to be harped on down here. Yeah, I don't need this shit. And she was like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I don't need you. Yeah, I need tone. I mean, be harped on down here. Yeah, I don't need this shit. And she was like, no, no, no, no, no, you're loud. She's like, I'm not loud. I'm not being loud. I'm like, you're being fucking loud now. My, my newest thing I find is the, it's positive heckling. So it's hard to get mad at them. You look great. They end up getting like removed.

All right. And you're like, oh, I, I'm sure the people around you hated you, but it's hard to like fire at them when they're like, the heckle is like, you're the best. Big J. You know, and then the people around are like, shut up. Yeah, it's that repetitive. Something happens. Some type of drug they're on where they're repetitive.

They just, they have to keep saying that shit and you acknowledge it. I mean I don't mind once and I get a lot of that O and A stuff. The one the my favorite one is Bobby you are the best and I'll go thank you and they'll go not you not everybody gets it. Yeah, I have different fans you know I have you know bonfire fans that have YKW and they like what the fuck did you do that for you? I'm like, no, no, no, it's not a bad thing.

He's just being, it's a joke. Yeah. But this time of year is a bad time to do. I usually never, ever do stand up during Christmas. Really? Because of the Christmas party shit, dude. Oh yeah, everybody here. You go in there and there's 30 people from Tito's

and they don't get, dude, they don't give a fuck about you. It's not your show. It's their... It's their show. It's their party and you're working for them. And you can't, they're all looking at the boss to make sure she's laughing. Yeah.

And I say she, because it's 2023. Oh, and it was a guy pretending to be a woman? No, it was... Oh, no. Oh, no. It was a... No, no. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No's a shit time to do. Poor Pinoya, when we were in a Houston Texan. This is gonna be the hardest show I've ever done with you. Why? I'm looking at this eye of redness. You look like you're crying. Oh, you're well sad. It's just, it's just, wow.

Don't touch it, don't touch it, don't touch it. No, it's the tea. I know, but the eye. Is it freaking out? It's freaking even notice it until I said it before. No, but now it's like red. Well, because I just put the hot copper here. Hot tea peg.

Yeah. Just turn to the left to look like right there. No, no, the other way around. Just keep it over here. Yeah, do you show to the side? Just look at me through that. That's better. No, no, no, no, no, look.

Hang on, boy, if I can look you for one second. Stys of the worst, man. Yeah. You know what they're from? Stress. No. No. it's from poop. Mmm Like I'm sure that could happen. I don't think I have shit eyes. 100% from poop. Huh? That's pink I know. I'm just trying to do comedy show. Sorry, Christine. I didn't know we're doing a

fresh. I'm sure it could be poop. This is MS NBC. I have a good twink. That's the wrong information. I know this is MS NBC. That's pink guy. That's the wrong information. Who, my cause of style in your eye though, it's dirty. I think, yeah, I was getting, I know one of them causes your eye to fucking swell up. Shit does fuck with your eye. I'm sure. Now what is it?

What are your turd eyes? Turd eyes? You got a big piece of turd eyes. Lewis gets turd eye all the time from sticking his fucking ass and someone's, sick as his eye and somebody's ass all. You Lewis, Mike Vekio and my two friends who also would get stys a bunch. I think they're stress.

Is it stress? My wife got a surgery today. Yesterday was a very stressful dinner. I'm sorry. Is she okay? By mom. Yeah, I think she's gonna be all right. Oh, that's she all right?

Yeah. Okay, good. She's all right. I didn't know that, dude. I would have called you. I didn't know she was in surgery. Did I know that? No, I don't know if I've said much about it,

but like, she's just getting like something removed that could be a problem, so it's gotta find out if it's a problem. But I think the removal of it is the whole process. What is that your father? No, my mom. Are they getting divorced? No, they're getting divorced. No, they get it, like when're biopsying this thing it

should be also like whether it's cancerous or not right it should be done. Okay good. So yeah, that's a good thing. Oh good. What is it from? Oh, oh, it's an is it. What is it from? Is it from poop or from stress? Touching your eyes with unwashed hands being shit. In certain contact ones are fairly disinfecting them or washing your hands Shit, you contact lens Leave on makeup overnight. I do that a lot. You do that a lot especially when you go to concerts have

Blepharitis you have that you've had that twice Blepharitis I have had that Or I have rosacea which I don't have I't believe. So yeah, it just is what it is. It should be gone by tomorrow, I hope. Yeah. I think so. That's all right. I go at it pretty aggressive.

Let me punch you in the other eye, so look the same. Ooh. But I do so much when I have these things that you probably shouldn't do with your eyes. Just like the stuff I'll put on them. Right, everything. It's things you probably shouldn't put by your eye. I use like the, the acne wipes that just burn,

and then I open my eyes and like blurry for five minutes, and then I'm probably all right. There's no tears, do the wash of that stuff out. You toast dry on the stove. See if I can dry this bitch out first. How close you get to this, just dry it up and pop? Bad at a round because I have syringe needles at my house now.

No, no, no, no, no. Bad it around taking a shot at it. Holden the eyelid up and just taking a whack at it. She's going over to Dr. Gale. He'll rub fucking monkey gizz on it. Oh, he has the cure for stye right behind his ego waffles. Everything's in his freezer, bud. I got a splinter this year.

And it was, you know, I went in, I thought it went out and then my hands swelled up and it got really fucking bad. But there's nothing more satisfying when I squeezed it and an inch and a half long splinter shot out of the hole. I even know it was in there. I thought I got to split it out, but it was in there causing an infection and I squeezed it and it shot out of the hole. I even know it was in there. I thought I got to split it out, but it was in there causing an infection

and I squeezed it and it shot out like a fucking knife blade. It just shot out. And then all the gunk. And all the gunk came out. I, that literally stuff like that with other people, not as much on TV, but in person I can never watch that happen.

On TV I can't, but for myself, getting out gunk is my favorite thing in the world. Yeah. Doesn't bother me on myself at all. Yeah, I can be all that gunk. Get a, oh, you have an ingrown hair that goes sour. Sure. Ooh.

Do you have it where you popped it and then the hair pops out? It's like two, it's like, it's a wet. It's like twin hair. It's super wet. It's been living under It's like twin hair. It's super wet. It's been living under your body in that little bubble and pus for so long. Yeah, it looks like pedophile sweaty hair.

Oh, it's a brand new like wet eyelash. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Oh. Oh, that's right. There is something about that that's just fucking, just what's the word? Satisfying.

Satisfying. That's satisfying. Yeah. Is it doing those videos they always have where it's someone like cutting soap into like a thousand little thing? word, satisfying. That's a satisfying. Does it do with those videos they always have where it's someone like cutting soap into like a thousand little thing? Oh, that is, oh, the watching a video, this is style.

I, under the eye. There it is. And they hit it with a needle. That is not a good thing to do. Can I just say though, she has beautiful eyes. Style removal. Oh, look at that. Oh man, they use a good of tips to squeeze it out.

All done. They're using Qtips as fingers. I'm doing it tonight. No, no, no, no. All right, if you do it tonight, you have to video tape, but we have to watch it tomorrow. I'd have to do this, though, Bobby.

What I'd be stabbing is underneath my eyelid. Yeah, oh, it's on the inside. Yeah, yeah, mine's underneath. You can't do that, you cannot do that then. I don't know if that's true. No, you can't do that, dude. If you lose it, imagine you lose an eye. Imagine the dog barks and Christine flinches

and sticks it in your eye. And then you have a gray eye. That would kind of cool off a skank vest. Would look pretty neat. Be both. Like, pet one eye, like, fetiwop. Yeah, you fucking wear those mittens with the fingers, no fingers and the one eye, that'd be the shit.

You know the guy Charleston White, we talking about who like the provocateur who was like bombing the guy tacked him on stage Oh, yeah, yeah, remember talking about that. He I didn't know this. He's got a glass eye He took it out an interview recently and just takes removes it out I just a haul it's just head behind that Michael Bissbing has that too. Yeah, yeah, he got his eye poked in a match that Michael Bissbing has that too. Yeah, he got his eye poked in a match. He fought. He fought one eye when he won the championship.

Pretty crazy. And he didn't tell the UFC. Yeah. How bad is that make Luke Rockhold feel? Oh, he just took it. It's so weird because that's cool though, because you can change your eye. You know, you have a bunch of,

you'd have a little Louis Vuitton eye. I absolutely have several different eyes if I had a glass Skank eye and you know every podcast you did a you know a bonfire. I you put it a little fire. Oh that'd be great That's gross man I Mean he just sticks his finger in his eye rolls it and pops it out. I'll say this Michael Bissbing I'll say this Christine would still do it. But yeah, see?

How do you put it back in? I want to see how he puts it back in. Is that, that must be hard. I don't think so. No. Oh, he's shit. He has pops back in there. Oh, that's no.

Wait a minute, I'm welcome. That's special. That's special. I mean, you can't even tell. Well, it looks like he has like, like his eyes don't move in in unison. I noticed that I didn't know it was a glass I can be fooled by that very easily. Yeah, what kind of eye would you get? I get a diamond die I think the the skanks logo would be a pretty good one Skank would be good get a Jewish flag guy. Oh, yeah, and then but I do a thing

It's like a trick one like when I blank it'll be Palestine It'll be home. I blank it'll be Palestine Israel oh Palestinians Abortion abortion woman's right to choose Biden We got to be out of this weather for a little bit. That was nice. Did not. There was a fucking monsoon down in that shithole.

Rain every day. Every day to Lindy and like 60 something and rainy and... And then you left and Jacob's out there shooting guns outside. Yeah, and oh, you want to hear this. I want to hear how life is fucking. Did you see what Kevin Brennan said? No. Kevin's funny, man. Did I he was it was on his show. He's like Bob Kelly skinny and Jim Norton's married to a dude. What the fuck is I don't know what to do. I don't know what to say

I did see that I saw him talking about Norton and Nicky's thing their video Yeah, yeah, he's not being quite as light-hearted as we are about it. Well, I mean, it's, yeah, he's, I mean, we love the show. We're fans of the show. Let him do the show. Well, it's from fans of them.

It's a show. I think they're, I think they're gonna pitch it as a show. I think this, Sure. I think the YouTube page will become a show at some point or at least try to become a show. Yeah. I mean, we would watch that. I've watched that on Netflix. Yeah, they'd have to have really violent domestic fights though. Nikki and the guy who sucks dickie.

Da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da That's it. It's Nikki and the guy is a tiki baby. Yeah, I would watch it, but he said, he said, oh, thanks, message. She fucks his butt, right? I would imagine, I would imagine, I don't really know. I'm very close friends with Bailey J's husband, Matt, and I've never had a conversation one time. Well, you're not close friends with Bailey J's husband, Matt, and I've never had a conversation one time. Well, you're not close friends. Well, I don't really get into that. You know what I mean? I don't really, I don't want to know. I'm very close friends and I'm close friends with Norton. I just don't know if they get sausage up the old keyster.

If he get, yeah, I would imagine if I was him, say, I, say, I had enough balls to live the life I really wanted to live. Sure. Say, I was strong enough. Are you living, are you not living out loud? Yeah. Say, I was strong enough to tell Don to go beat it and tell Max, listen, you'll be fine. She'll find somebody else.

She'll find somebody else. Your dad's going to live out loud. And I could hook up with that girl What was the girl we had in here? Trans yeah, what was her name? That we drew Emma Rose Emma Rose and I could just look I could just go to her go look at my huh. That's a gary I dude she was banging a In finance

They might even still be no she's with somebody else now. She's with a big dude now. She's just a man. You stay with it. You stay on top of it just in case. You'll find yourself in the market. Hey, notice me. And you're both single at the same time. I'm just saying if you're going to do that,

you're going to mind as well, you know, go do everything. She was a very pretty one, but would you, but does Emma Rose, you think she wants to fuck your butt? I don't know I think she tries to keep her weiner as out of the game as possible No, they want to they want to why wouldn't you want to fuck a butt? I just don't know if that's their thing sure yeah, well, I think all right Well, we talked about this before but if you're on hormones You're you want to be fucked if you're off your hormones you want to be fucked. If you're off your hormones, you want to fuck.

You become more of a dude. Well, you like you want to use your dick, right? I think that's, I think, I don't know, but when I talk to Billie J. Her pecker was so little. Well, to you, I mean, perfect to other people. I mean, that's a perfect packet of me. But I think that pecker was by design little.

I think she takes all the stuff so it gets all teeny. No, I think that's your pecker. I don't think you can make your pecker smaller. She's had a little dinker on her. I think that's a normal, can I just stop right there? Sure. I think that's a perfect size penis. And it's a normal size penis, Jay.

Like if I was to have that size penis, that would be a great, you don't mean that. I do. She has a nice penis. It's something she got her balls removed, but she still has her balls. Balls are also removed. And that sucks.

I mean, if I'm gonna be with her, I want those big nuts, my chin. You can get my, I want a hot day nut, red on my chin. I wonder how good my weiner would look if I had no balls in the way. I don't know how you get hard with no balls. Huh?

Oh, how? You get hard with no balls? I'll tell you exactly how. Smack it off in front of a bunch of guys, the way she did. I remember she kept jostling it until it got a little harder. Yeah. It was crazy.

We all stared right at it. That's how I know I'm not gay. That's how I argue with people at the time. That's how I know I'm not gay. Because I can look at it. I don't have any feelings. I'm curious though to see what happens. Right, yeah.

And it got hard for a little bit. You always did. No, hers. Oh, I was gonna say it. Mine was hard from the tick-swing. She said she walked in. Right, yeah, you didn't have to play guitar on it. And then when she shows her wiener, my wiener went,

Oh, it went by way, but then something and said, I was like, wait, stay hanging there. Yeah, I don't know if he does that. I would imagine that they have fun all around. Yeah. Yeah, I'm sure we're gonna find out on the show. At some point. You think it's gonna dive into that?

Well, you gotta let us in. If you're gonna have a show like that, you're gonna have to let us in at some point. I mean, she is ridiculously hot. Yeah, yeah. We're talking about what's in here. Emma Rose. Emma Rose. Yeah, she's nuts.

Well, that's her in a scene with somebody else. She's just so hot. I'll tell you what. What? that's her in a scene with somebody else. She's just, I'm gonna tell you what. What? It's like on a day to day, when she gets done up too much, I always feel like that's what it does. When the too much makeup and everything,

it looks like, like that just looks like a hot chick. That's a hot chick. Yeah. That's just a hot chick. Hot chick. Madden hot chick. With a little,

little dinger. Well, I don't know if it's little, again, I'll stick up for that penis. As long as I have a penis that size that was to come for it It's a pretty small hard we it's a it's a nice size dinger. I would say perfect. I would say Christmas size fun size Fun size for sure. I would say fun size What do you say Jacob? Party size party size. Yeah, no without a doubt, but I do I I whole I maintain if I'm jumping into the world of

Trans having sex with trans people. Yeah, I don't know why I want to bring me a monster hog I want to see the crazy juxtaposition of hot chick monster hog. Maybe you can never come back from that Well, I don't think I'm gonna do it. I'm just saying that if I was going to do it, I think, yes, I think all this talk is healing your eye. It's getting better as we talk. Oh, yeah, yeah. Is it? Yeah, what a trans talk made your eye better. Clear your pores out. That's because it's not all red from the T bag. Jay, it's not that bad. It's not, dude, I'm sorry. I don't mean to pick on you. It's, it's not that boyfriend. That's the guy. That's the new guy. So that's upgrade for me and right there.

What if that used to be a girl? No. No, that's good. No, that's good. This dude's give it, this guy's actually giving great advice about trans. Is he really? Yeah, he gave about,

I've seen. Close your eyes and accept it. He's saying, He's saying if guys call you gay, the first thing was like if guys call you gay for like, and trans women, they're uncomfortable with their sexuality. Mm-hmm. That doesn't hold up. That's not true.

Hey, hey. They might call you gay, but these guys are just uncomfortable in their sexuality. And they're also saying guys, sliding their herty-ems, when no one's around. That is true. That probably happens a lot. I mean I did it after the show Okay, I was like hey good stuff today real funny job on the show You look great She wrote thanks with a thumbs up. I was like blue

Other than sometimes with the porn stars NCR show but killer job is always just some kind of a DM to be like What's up? I'm still here. I'm around. Say how to great time you had with me also, please. Buddy, this weekend I had Danny, uh, Danny Braf. You know, Danny, he's, uh, you know, the autistic kid. He's a leader of the occult. Yeah, exactly. He's goofy. Talk. Look, I love Danny. Sure. But he is one of the most hairy human beings. Ever of a man. Is he really? Dude did his eyebrow hair and his pubic hair connect And he yeah, he's and he's you know, he's definitely a hundred percent artistic Can't really look at you in the eye when he talks to you kind of all around great kid very smart and funny funny guy

And he came down to me this weekend after the show on After the first show on Friday. I get a hot smoking hot blonde in my DMs and she retake great show. Really funny. Had a good time. What was that nerdy? What was that nerdy? Yeah, go bless you. No, sorry, go bless you. No, it's all right. Go bless you. Um, no, I'm just okay. She sneezed. Uh, she's allergic to you. I I'm Take care of this. Yeah, you know what I mean? Justine stop trying to get the list. Wherever Bobby he's talking Dan put up with the ship, but I'm not gonna know

Well, really he didn't yeah, not gonna happen. Okay, take care of it. Um She goes, what was that nerdy? goes, what was that nerdy goofy boy that was on before you? That's what she wrote. Oh. And I thought she was, so I wrote back, Danny Braff, blah, blah, blah. She winds up DMing him, hooking up with him.

They hooked up. Dude, she's fucking, I'm telling you, smoking, dude, beautiful blonde. And she's like, she's telling you smoking, dude. Beautiful blonde. And she's like, she's coming back to meet me. I'm like, buddy, it's not, this is a trick. This is, she's gonna rob you. This is something, you're gonna wake up in a tub tomorrow where you kid your gone.

You know, there's no way. I love you kid, but this isn't right. It's something. She's aggressively doling out aides to people or something. Something, dude, but they hooked up. They did. They hooked up. He fucked her.

He didn't fuck her. What does that mean? Blowjob. She blew him. She blew him. Uh huh. On the beach. What?

Yeah. The beach is right there. The beach is right there. Yeah, you didn't know Daniel Beach where you played. Really? Okay, well, I didn't know. I got an Airbnb with a pool so we didn't have to Beach were you played? No, really, okay, well, I didn't know. I got an Airbnb with a pool, so we didn't have to go to the beach. I mean, it's called Daniel Beach.

No, I didn't know he was going to the beach. Yeah, he went to the beach with her and hooked up, and they had a fun time. Really? I don't get the fucking world we live in. Let me see the picture on your phone, what she looks like. I will right now.

Go to her page. I will. I'm gonna see. Go to her page. I will. I'm gonna see this. Okay. Super hot chick. Smoking. You held on that M for a while. Okay, so you have to compare the two.

You have to put Danny in her. Okay, that's not fair. That's not fair. I'm a pretty hot chick for Danny Braff. And I. He should be so lucky. All right, yeah, you got to get the Instagram. Um, dude, I, I, I, here's my fucking ego. I'm like, I gotta turn this girl down because I'm, you know, I gotta keep. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I'm waiting for, hey, man, you know, he was really funny.

What are you doing? Or something like that, you know? Yeah. Nothing to do with me. All goofy boy, call them a boy, goofy boy. Who's the goofy boy? Goofy boy. I want to pull seamen out of his cock. That's horrific. The way I put it, it's good for him though. It's great for him.

Well, let's see here, because now you started, you went from smoking hot to dialing it back to like, well, what is it's a gauge we're talking about here? Well, I mean, I'm gonna tell you now, dude. She's hot. I mean, I looked at her photos and she's hot. When she said, when he said she's coming back to meet me,

I was like, I was concerned legitimately like, this is bad, like something's gonna happen. This isn't how life works. Like, she's going to, she's got somebody coming to and they're gonna fuck you up Is there not an initial thing with a I mean Like girls girls probably hate this too like you probably hate a fake girl if you were single Or not even just being single if a guy talks to you exclusively about like a friend of yours Is there any tinge of like I don't I thought you'd be attracted to me, but I guess it's my friend

Or you don't give the whole give a shit with that I feel like I was so used to it Okay, that was sad Because I was gonna say the same things you know, I bring like Justin silver on the road me and stuff and there was actually a girl this weekend Who sat in the let me see I don't know it's like Comics get girls out of their league constantly. Yeah, but not this out of his league. Which one? I mean it doesn't matter

That's the the one right there the blonde. There's two blondes in the picture. I swap swept down That's the the one right there the blonde there's two blondes in the picture. I swap swap down Swip that's where that you sometimes whip You can use it if you want you like it like it whip Swip I take it I'm like it's mine. Yeah, Joe's take it. It's everybody's sweat it now. What absolutely great job Danny breath I mean bro. It doesn't make sense Yeah Great job, Danny Braff. I mean, bro, it doesn't make sense. Yeah. Hold the phone up to the camera, please.

Yeah, you're dirtball. I'm fine though. Let me get a hang on Jacob, I'm gonna free his bank bank. Yeah, I can find it on Instagram. It's called suck Danny Braff's dick. Dude, on a beach. Like Sandy D. No.

I'll take a look. Dude, Sandy. Sandy. I mean, come on, bro. Wow. Yeah, wow. Put it W. I slow down. This isn't a wow, but this is a,

how you know what? Do you know Danny Braff, Jacob? I saw him for the first time at the club. So you saw? Yeah, then it's a wow for sure. You saw him, he looked like, right? Yes. Oh, here's a good wow.

I said by my wow. No, here's a good wow. Yeah. That's a while. That's a while. No doubt. Tell me. That's a while. Oh, Danny, Danny, Danny, me more I like looking at trains I can't stand in your eyes I mean bro Crazy showing it to look in the one eye though the one I'd monster am I right? Jacob if you were here I'd walk over and give you an arm slap for that. That was so good

I mean crazy good for him. But there's a girl this weekend who is nothing about like even attraction to her or her. She's been at two of my shows now and it keeps constantly coming up. Like the subject that we talk about from her, me and her in the audience. Like I recognized her again and her thing is like she hasn't had sex in 11 years. 11 years, celibate, no dating, no nothing at all. And I, she messaged me or something, like great show, thanks for involving me again,

and blah, blah, blah. She goes, you know, my celibacy is self-imposed, but I would break it in a heartbeat for Joe DeRosa. Joe DeRosa? What? I don't know. I think there's just a thing, you know what I mean? Like there's a thing.

Of course. Like you like a thing. Yeah, yeah. I mean, Joe gets a lot though and I've never, I've never understood Joe, but his confidence is mind boggling. Oh, yeah. Because I've seen Joe shirtless. Oh, yeah.

And it's close to like an old Italian aunt. Mm-hmm. You know what I mean? It's E.T.ish. It's very yeah like we did that movie. But he goes for it and he just pulls. That movie cheat. I mean, he's not sure. And he had to take a shower and in the movie you see him like take a shirt off and one of his tits jiggles. I was like, woo, but he gets he pulls chicks. Yeah. Chicks love him. Christine's blown away that she never fucked Joe the Rosa. She can't believe it happened before he met her.

You don't believe it. You think she did. The Rosa told you she did. Yeah, she's been lying for all these years probably. She put the other person. I mean, I would put money on that day hooked up at some point. Yeah. Very possible.

Drunk Christine. Drunk Christine. Drunk Christine. Drunk Christine. Christine from manager of Stand Up New York? Well, yeah, and working economics. Yeah, I was put fucking Lenny Marcus on that list too. Hahaha. Dan Nathamon, hand job. People were attracted to who they were attracted to.

You know what I mean? Well, if you found out,, can I ask a question? My soul, Christina, I was super duper in a Christine. Didn't have to find anybody else off her though. Can I? If you found out that she was with somebody that you knew, right? Would that bug you? Like now, if you found out now, she was like, look,

I want to tell you something. I hooked up with so and so. A friend of mine? Somebody you know. But there's difference between somebody I know. A friend of yours. Yes, a friend of yours. A friend of mine.

A friend of yours that you've been with and you've hung out together and you're friendly but she never told you she was like, look, a long time ago, very long time ago. One night, a Tuesday night, it was a snow storm, blah, blah, blah. And we hooked a white Christine's, look at it and I'm like, what do you look at? What do you know?

What do you know? What? Yeah, Christine may have sucked off Joe at some point. It's possible. I never sucked off Joe. I really am so famous. Me and Joe used to get drunk together a lot, but he- Did you get that, Lou?

Oh, please have that next time it deroses it. It just really liked even though they weren't dating, I kind of felt like he belonged to a friend of mine. And really? Yeah. It's weird how girls think. It just because they would like hook up. And they don't think of friends.

And it just didn't, so it didn't even occur to me. Like, he was kind of like, it didn't even occur to me to like be flirtatious with him. Yeah, guys feel like if we have you, we share you. We belong to all of my friends. I don't know. Girls are like, no, I don't want to go. That's, that's, that's Kathy's.

That's Kathy's. That's your Kathy's. Yeah, Joe, yeah, she was hanging out with her. We're like, too much, she was hung out. Take some, that's on the table. Take what you want. Yeah, hungry, grab some. It ain't enough fun if you're hungry, see happening. If it was like a friend that'd be bummed that it took

You know 11 12 years to tell me that for sure, but uh It was somebody I knew you wouldn't care Now and I'm saying like friends like even big enough acquaintance wouldn't about you know more like I know you're very close But like y'all honest, but me and y'all are just like acquaintances more. Right. Than like friends. And like, so that wouldn't like shake my foundation. If I found out like, Dawn, the only one that would bother me, I think would be like, Quinn. A fine dream guy.

Yeah, first of all, Colin, for some reason, is every girl's dream guy. Like every girl I know in the business, like I would love to be with Colin. Do you like Colin? Now? Well, he's just a little older from my taste, but I do love Colin.

Is there something about him though? I've heard many people say he's really good. I mean, he's so smart and so funny, like you know, it's something where I'm like, yeah, of course I get it. Now girls like smart and funny, we just like, uh, girls who like us.

I like a girl who really digs me. Yeah, that's a lie a lot. Do you like me a lot? The nommit. Because if you really like me that'll knock about 40 pounds off of you. I will knock about 40 pounds off of you and if you touch my penis on the first date, you're getting flowers. Yeah. Yeah, he's, uh, he's, if I found a cheat, I'll be one about you.

How about this, no sex at all, but Dawn, when I'd agreed to let Norton P all over her and Wack off in front of her. I would be laughed. No, you'd be super upset. I wouldn't be upset. No, Norton, where's the, would you be like, where's the dawn

that's set there getting pissed on by Norton? Where's that lady at? I would laugh. I'd be like, remember, here's what bothers me. And I think with, with men,

it's, I'd rather see dawn suck a dick than make out with a guy in her pants, right? Yeah, absolutely. I'd rather, so with Colin, I know there would be something deeper. With Norton, as she just had a moment and let this little troll piss on her, you know what I mean? And he did something, probably Conner

and do it as something. I don't know. She got dropped. That is funny, that's the funniest thing that goes, I'd really rather have you get peed on by a guy than kiss him. Right though, it's like a guy thing. It's like there's something,

if I see you holding hands and then you put your leg up and start kissing, some of them. Sex versus emotion. That's the whole thing I said. I would rather a, Christine get double teamed and go out to fucking, to a lovely brunch and movie with some guy she just thought was really interesting and cool.

Yeah, all right. Some guy with a scarf. Yeah. Let me get my driving gloves and we'll take my classic car out for dinner. She's like, oh, you fuck. interesting and cool. Yeah, right. Some guy with a scarf. Yeah. Yeah. Let me get my driving gloves and we'll take my classic car out for dinner. She's like, oh, you fuck. She's like, I'm so glad your mittens are like not cut. Oh my god, your gloves have fingers.

Oh my god. Do I deserve this? I think we laid out our histories pretty quick. Do I deserve a guy with full mittens? Do I deserve a guy with full fingered gloves? That doesn't seem like a reserve. What's the Christine? We laid out our histories pretty quick with each other

into dating, but you had somebody that, there wasn't a lot of people that I hooked up with that were around, but Jay had a lot of people he hooked up with that were around or would still come to shows or whatnot. But there was one girl that was like, I don't know if you should, I don't think you were trying to keep it from me, but you told me kind of late that you hooked up with her and she was something that was like really around. Did you fuck Liz?

No. You fuck Liz? No, no, no. But it was like, it was like something that like worked, it was a waitress at one point and like friend of a friend. At the seller. Yeah. Black?

Mm-hmm. Oh yeah, yeah. Oh, I know it is. You're wrong about that though. She was not around. And then she popped up around one point. I was like, oh, by the way, that reminded me. Because I felt bad because we were all sitting there talking.

I was like, oh, I should tell her that. Like, I looked up at that girl before. I feel bad for comics now because the world has changed so much and the job place has changed so much that you can't, like back in the day, waitresses and comics, kind of, we fucked each other. Oh, I know. We,

I can't use these though. Christine's a waitress hoe. I was not a waitress hoe. I, other than Jay, I hooked up with like two comics. Oh my god. Christine, one of the fuck, several comics, the problem was, again, not being aware of her own, she would wanna get drunk probably to make that happen

and then gets very sloppy drunk. So I think like, she ended up having a lot of crushes on people you didn't end up fucking. I had crushes that didn't even go anywhere and I didn't really hang out with comics before I started hanging out with Jay. Like I hung out with like, staffs, you know. Yeah. So, but there was like a guy-

Three staffs at a time, I hear. Hahaha. One of the comics was a guy that like told me that she was the comic- She was the- She was the door guy girl. Hahaha. How about this terrible situation to have? I'd already made fun. I don't know the guy. Well, it all very nice guy. Funny from LA Nate Craig. Does name. Nate Craig came into the show

one time and great dude at the end of it. I was like, you know, it's funny. Christine says, she remembers a night that you guys were all like hanging out at the thing and you guys like probably made out For a while she said and he was just he was almost a polygic when he was like I have no idea like he doesn't remember it at all In fact, it's pretty sure it didn't happen. He says that's how memorable Christine was still What's that magical night because because it was actually date rape and sure I think it was magical I just was one of the only nights I made out and didn't fuck so it's done out for me if I didn't make out Jesus I know you just like Christine talking to bury yourself. I don't have to lay that much out there

Wow, I mean I was what it sounds you only kiss and then stick it in my vagin let him come in it I was one of the times I only kissed and then stick it in my badge and let him come in it. I can't do that. Never been pregnant. Thank you very much. No. They all blow at my asshole. They look like she's for me. I make them all cream pie my shitter.

That way I never get pregnant. I do it the Catholic way. I don't come in my ass and let Jesus so much. Oh my God. This is like the first time I've ever made out with a guy and not had him come in my ass hole. That's weird for me. This is the first time I did like I just make a guy and not had him come in my asshole. That's weird for me. This is the first time I know that guy, he's just mega with me and then come in my ass

one they may wicken to. But my first club was really pretty strict about not hanging out with the comics and not hooking up with the comics and I think I kind of carried that with me and I really didn't want to be somebody that fucked a bunch of comics. So she fucked a bunch of stuff instead? So she fucked. yeah, I mean, it was fun though. I don't think they do that anymore though. Like I don't know comics that are back like back in the day we used to just fuck around. We had a fun time. And it wasn't looked you didn't get in trouble. There was no, you know, now I think that you can't really my interaction with Weight staffs on the road like historically in the past I've hooked up with staff on the on road gigs before but I that's like

Many years off. I don't think they really hang like that Any more like the staffs and if they do It's more like a friend crew like the crew at L.O.L. and St. Antonio. They're awesome staff there And they all go yeah, they're great. They all go out. There's like a Multi-tiered parking lot and they go out to the parking lot and they just kind of like so they put on music It's empty at night when they're done and they just go out there and like smoke weed and like bullshit and talk shit MS-13 gang who hangs out in a parking lot like that. No, it's fun. It's like a nice little thing And he's go like walk right back to the hotel.

Yeah, I like the comedy on state. Crew is like that. We hang out hang at those stairs. Hang out, smoke cigars, go somewhere. I very cool, but a lot of times it gets, it kind of buzz me out because I'll see like the week before they have this group photo with John Malay, whoever it is. Yeah.

And it's just this big group photo and, you know, 30 staff members. Yeah. And then I'm leaving. And it's like, all right, bye. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. See you later. We're going to do that big, uh, goes, no, not this way.

Yeah, I know. I think we're okay. Thanks very much. We got one with you already. Yeah, we got it. Um, I had an embarrassing moment with the manager. She came up to me and she goes, Hey, how you doing? I'm like, Hey, what's up?

This is one of the managers, because the improv's have like 50. And she's like, Hey, are you the headliner? And I was like, I go, what the fuck? I go, you don't even know who the fuck in headliner is, are you a club? Well, she's like, oh. What picture was sent?

The most recent one. Okay. I mean, on the front of the building. All right. It's everywhere. That's fair. But she was like, no, I'm over at the bar. Oh, I told you, I'm busy.

You know, whatever. I'm over at the bar. She's like, well, this is a comic that wants to do a guest spot. I'm like, what the what fucking world am I in right now? Some dude just came up to me and said, I'm a comic. And you didn't even know the fuck I am. And you want me? Hey, are you the right guy? Oh good

I don't need something from you Fucking absolutely not. Oh, that's a bad way to start. Yeah, for sure Yeah, that's why I step the hostesses at the stand Google image the lineup. Yeah, they should if they didn't know who Everybody in that place should know who the fucking headliner is so when you walk in they don't go Excuse me, sir. You can't well. I'm the fucking guy on the thing above your head dumb dumb fuck face Yeah, then you're the asshole. Norton walked in to stand up New York one time and asked to go on and the people working just had no idea Who he was at all no shit. Yeah, that's the famous. They said I don't know if that's true or not the LOL comedy club Like the little shitty one in Times Square. Yeah, that Bill Burr went there to go

Run some stuff and they didn't that's true. Let him in yeah, yeah for SNL so fine. They didn't let him on Crazy, yeah, but they didn't know because they were just like this guy's asking for they did that to me at um What's the one in Chicago the one you play Zanies Zanies the one downtown? Mm-hmm. I did the I did I just did the laugh factory across the way right to me, what's the one in Chicago, the one you play, Zany's. Zany's. The one downtown. I did the, I just did the laugh factory across the way. Right. I had my show there, packed out, sold out. So I just walked over to the Zany, went over to Zany's to go

and I think Joe Liss was there. And one of the back hallway and we knocked on the door and the guy opened the door and he's like, he's like, yeah, I'm like, hey, would you want to check out Joe list? I'm friends with Joe list. Shucks the door comes back. He's like, yeah, it's it's packed back here or something like that. And I just walked away. I didn't say, I'm like, go fuck yourself. You know something. You know more than the manager of the club. You don't know. I'm not like, I'm not, look, I'm not famous, famous, but I'm at least in the business. No, you are certainly in comedy famous.

Say, well you could go a little further than that. I thought you were gonna go further. I thought you were gonna say. No, I'm saying if you work in comedy, it's insane if they don't know who you are. I had a different approach, but yeah, maybe there's a better way to, if you could help me up a little more.

Look, you've done some television. Sure. Okay. It came and went. But, okay, this is going to be my life. If you know Stanham Comedy, you've heard the name Robert Kelly. Okay. I mean, heard it is not as good as... And then probably seen a version of you in some capacity.

I mean, if they worked there, my point is they were wrong and you were right. You shouldn't have been treated that way. Your eye looks completely better. Yeah. Yeah. All the redness is gone. Whatever you, whatever, whatever gypsy shit she just put on your eye. No gypsy shit.

Whatever. Don't touch it, don't touch it, don't touch it, don't touch it. You have dirty fingers, you touch the keyboard, you did all this stuff and that's why you have a dirty pig eye right? There's keyboard at all. Well whatever you touch in in the studio. I'm a turd eyes You have a turd eyes and I don't like looking at it. Okay, your eyes are too pretty to be fucked up When we get the stuff what was that stuff Isabella was talking about yesterday? It makes the white to your eyes pop

I want it. Oh, I know what you're talking about. They have that for actors. Yeah, they said for actors Yeah, they do a lot of little tricky things for Nice. There's a drops black little into your face. It makes the whites of your eyes super super white. So make your eye color pop. Yeah, so when you do a movie They'll put that in the makeup lady will put it in. I was on a some TV show and the other the star star was getting his eye white. The person who would have gotten into Zane, he's that night. Yeah, John, I think it was John Corbett. There you go. He's already in, he's in there watching Joe list.

He gets asked to go on stage every once. Dude, he's such a funny guy. John Corbett. Dude, he used to come into my dressing room when we used to, we had in Queens. I had my own little spot and he would come in and think. He would leave just like lunches in my fridge.

I can just be like burritos and I didn't know it was for like a month and then he would draw a dick on my wall. He was coming to draw huge dicks and balls on my wall. You're being haunted by hilarious ghosts. But I would get in trouble. He'd be like, this man, you gotta stop trying a dick thing. I was like, dude, it's not me. It's John and they were like, okay, whatever

They didn't believe the John Corbett was doing it. Peasy shit John Corbett was in Northern exposure my big fat Greek wedding sex in the city Was he not an exposure started on Northern exposure? Yeah, that's a that's a deep pull of course you do Aden yeah, he's married to Brook Shields, bro. Is he? Who is still good looking? Is he currently married to Brook Shields? Yeah, they married. We saw her in a wedding.

Yeah, he's a, he, there, I mean, he's great. She's great, too. She came to a set a couple times. Smoking hot, but he is gorgeous, too. Did you ever see your naked when she was 14? I did. What? I think that's illegal, right?

Can we not look at that right now? You know, I'm gonna find it anymore. What movie was she naked 14? Blue Lagoon. But I think that's illegal, right? Can we not look at that right now? You may not find it anymore. What movie was she naked 14? Blue Lagoon? No, that was Brook Shields. Not, what did I say? Brook Shields.

I'm sorry, Bo Derrick. I stink. But. John Quartz made a Bo Derrick. No, she's way older than him. No, I swear to God, go back. I fucked up. Brook Shields, Bo Derrick.

They've been married for a while. Yeah, she's gorgeous Derek bow Derek She's 80 I was gonna say what did you see her negative 14 and the like 1900s? She's good look at she looks great, man Yes, sure she does for her thing for sure. She still looks great dude. Well, what is he? He's he's 58 Okay, so he's older than he's at all. Yeah, look at her, man Let's go and see her now. You're not no that was a bad time for them right there. That's where it didn't make much sense your crazy Jason Keep going again pretty

Sure pretty, but I'm telling you there's some sag underneath those jeans. No There's some wrinkle skin. I mean dude she was 38 when she made 10 That's what I mean. She's like 40. She's still but she's like she's like 40 years later I think she's still hot. I'm into it man. I'm into it. She's as hot as you're gonna be at that age But he is also aging now there. He looks good to women love him. I'll tell you. She's as hot as you're gonna be at that age, but he is also aging now. Yeah, he looks good too. Women love him. I'll tell you what, he's not aging great. Are you crazy? He was very, very handsome, y'all. I think he's better looking now than he was back then. Is a goofy little Alaskan redneck? She's only 63 and he's 59, so it's not crazy at all. No, no, wow. And she's hot. Look at her with those. She's Look at that dress, that green dress. Come on, clip that. Let me see that. Go on. I'm telling you.

Dude, zoom that up. Look at that. Get this broad naked. It's not as exciting as you're thinking. I don't I think you're wrong. You can see a little turkey neck. I mean, yeah, she's 60 something. You're gonna see a freckle that's older than you. A freckle that might take her out in a month. A freckle that's a little bit raised. We don't want to say anything until you have to be a batch. Oh, by the way, when I was wiping my come off of you, I noticed it's a little something here. You might want to get looked at. Mm-hmm, man.

You look at it, it's all. I mean, that, that, I don't know, that doesn't look that good. Look at that. Oh yeah, they went to space together. Yeah. They were have space outfits on. Yeah, I think she's hot. That's kind of my thing, no, I like it.

She says, hey, I'll tell you this. She's younger than Voss, and that's all that matters. She is. That's crazy, actually. What about Derek? She seemed very old and Tommy boy to me. Yeah. Remember Tommy Boy? Yeah, she seems very, very old and Tommy boy to me. Yeah. And remember Tommy Boy?

Yeah, she seems very, very old in that. She hasn't done many movies, right? No. She did Tommy Boy, she did 10. I can't think of anything else personally. It's a very weird career because she's famous for that one movie. Actually, she's famous, I'd say, more so for that scene, walking out of the water with the cornrows in her heart.

And her heart. And her heart. And her heart. Cultural appropriation, black loom, may I add, not so for that scene walking out of the water with the corn rows and our own cultural appropriation black loom. May I add not okay with that myself, but she made up for it with her flat white person butt and she had a flat white ass though, but that was again, it's so funny to see the ideal body of the time because her coming out of that water was like that's what you're supposed to look like as a girl. Yeah, do you have that? Let's watch. Let's see if it holds up.

See if it's still sexy. It will. You think it will? I don't know if it will. Yeah, for what it is, it will. I mean, we've seen this done better at this point with the Pam Anderson's of the world. But I don't know to boat there. I don't think she had fake titties.

I think those were real big gnats. Yeah, those are regular titties. Yeah, she's kind of, I mean her legs real big gnats. Yeah, those are regular teas. Yeah, she's kind of... I mean her legs aren't that muscular. Well, I'm not looking for muscular, but they're not super shapely. She's a little bony quite on. But that's what Hollywood is.

A little bony, but back then, that was something different. A lot of real estate between those cans. Yeah. You may tell you why I wouldn't vogue her. Why? Wongs, it looks like she speaks in the abonix but they're stupid hair. You don't like the braids? No, I don't like her Stevie Wonder hair.

It's not even the braids, it's her Stevie Wonder beads in the bottom. Skibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitibbitib Badabada, pa-duda-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba comic actors ever. Is he? The movie author? I'm genuinely saying that with not like judging you. I never watched Arthur. I don't, his thing doesn't do it for me. I saw the only movie I saw of Dudley Moore is the Dudley Moore Kirk Cameron vehicle. I want to say it was vice-versa, but that's not vice-versa. I think it might be. No vice-versa, I think was Judge Ryan Holden. Right, but it's a switch in Fred's average. Look at look at her dude God dang it Like father-like son, yeah him and Kirk Cameron

Remember for Kirk Cameron lost his shit. Yeah Kirk Cameron. Well, Kirby just found Jesus He showed a bump go back. Oh back. Oh, back. I'm crazy about it. I mean dude She's got a nice romp. I take it back. She does but she does She does but it's not as big as it could have been it's just it's the times that was the thing of the times a little narrow-ass But uh it's not a bad one. It's not a totally flat. There's some bad great bulls Dutely more yeah, I never heard of the Dudley Moore. Dude, Arthur is hilarious movie.

I think it's hilarious. I know every word from Arthur II's theme song. When you get a song between the moon and New York City. That's Arthur I. What's that from Arthur I? Yeah. I thought it was from part two, Arthur II on the rocks. I think they had it for both songs right both

Very possible. I think it's both movies may have been the song. Yeah, it's a great song. It's perfect for that movie that movie With eyes of an alley. It's a Christopher Cross in his Christopher cross who by the way never accused of pedophilia Never accused he was never accused of it I said years ago on this show, I go, wasn't he accused of pedophilia? I think he was accused of pedophilia. And then people started writing in the go, that's never happened. We looked it up a lot.

There's never been one accusation of it. So he is for the record. I will say it again. Christopher Cross did not is not accused of any kind of pedophilia. Not yet. Is he still alive? Cross did not is not accused of any kind of pedophilia not yet Is he still alive but when he gets caught between the moon and New York City With the Chinese boy

And a girl how they're gonna say something else I think I say something else we're gonna get fired for. Now we're live. With the Chinese boy. The best that you can't do. The best that you can't do. The best that you can't do. Best that you can't do. It's falling on me. These lyrics are so dumb though.

It's really right about Arthur. I haven't watched Arthur in a while. I wonder if it holds up. I think it would. It might, I'll tell you what, that's a fun, we gotta take a break, I know, but I'm very curious. Are there many good songs that are directly written for the movie?

And I don't mean like they use it in the movie. It's for the movie. I mean like the words of this are for the movie, yeah. I mean this is directly about Arthur. Let's think about that. Yeah. Why don't you guys think about a two out there and if you have it, you know, give us a ring over it. 866. Yeah. 866 9, 6, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, I'll also tell you before we take a break that Bobby Kelly is going to be in Fort Wayne, Indiana. Two shows one night, New Year's Eve. After that,

Sarah Togo Springs, New York, Wisconsin, Chicago, all on deck for tickets and tour dates, go to robbercoweylive.com. And again, we'll remind you Keith Robinson's taping tomorrow. Right. Tomorrow night. Make sure you go. Support the show. Even if you got something to do, cancel it. Go get your tickets. Sony Hall.com, 7 and 930 show. We need you guys to support. It's going to be, we're going to gonna be there come say hi to us and big jokes And we'll be in Pittsburgh for new years Eve weekend December 29th through the 31st after that. He's gonna be in Liberty Ohio Ohio Salt Lake City and then Denver. I mean he's got a bunch of shows coming up one of the funniest guys walking for tickets and info Please go to bigjacomity.com.

When you get caught, they take you to the moon and you'll be right back. It's the bonfire. I know it's crazy. But it's true. Hey, everybody, thanks for listening. That was just a portion of our actual Serious XM radio show. If you want the whole thing, go to seriousxm.com slashbombfire for a special offer.

That's right, and go to bigjcomedy.com and robbercallylive.com to check out our standup dates coming to a city near you.