The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Poetry In Motion (feat. Josh Adam Meyers)

Episode Date: August 18, 2021

Josh Adam Meyers joins the Bonfire and tells the gang about decorating his new apartment. Jay and Christine put their money where their mouths are and synchronize swim together for everyone to see.Stream "The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson & Dan Soder" for 3 months free on the SiruisXM app! Offer Details Apply: www.SiriusXM.com/Bonfire Follow us on all social media @TheBonfireXM @DanSoder www.DanSoder.com @BigJayOakerson www.BigJayComedy.com #CrackleCrackle

Hey, I'm Big J. Okreson. And I'm Dan Soder and welcome to the Bond Fire Podcast. Yeah, it's a podcast and it's also a radio show. You can hear our full show every day on Series XM. Go to series6m.com slash Bond Fire for a special offer. And now, the Bond Fire with Big J. Okreson and Dan Soder. Blue-ging-me-be. Jesus Christ. That's music.

No that. But just also know I would fuck about in John. Oh that old coin might really give you a run for your money. No. Would we finally have a come up with five ringdense in my head? Giant sapphire ringdense. Yeah enough. Yeah. P, enough.

Yeah, pussy bitch. You have to, he has, he beats you. Or you're a little mall. Or you're a high little mall. He beats you're aso bad. He feels bad for you. He gives him a pair of your glasses. Well, that looks stupid.

Goodbye, tub, a J. Somewhere up there in the, I can, I can, Roo. I. There in the corner that can rule. I want our guests to come on Josh had a Mars going to join us because we can't just watch dude. But the video is in the evidence. It's from Jay and Christine's synchronized swimming.

This is big. We probably should have an intro for it because I got to say very quickly. We're just I don't know. Good. I don't know how to describe it. Well, before we get to the video, I saw it. Go ahead. Oh, were you going to say Jacob?

Well, I'm just going to say upfront. I was humbled by it. Thank you. Damn. I haven't seen people. People the way to live were taken by it a bit. Lew and I have't seen it. People the widest it live were taken by it a bit. Yeah. Lou and I have not seen it.

Where mean? Lou have you seen it? No, no. Okay. Wow, mean Christine on land, oil and water. I'll tell you what, in water, we are water and water. Oh, water. We are one with, we are one with the waves.

It's a little more water, man. Yeah. Do you need a pool? Huh? Maybe we do need a pool. Oh, well, I hope they don't have speakers, so we could hear. Then like swimming the fucking Harry armpit, yodel bullshit. I'm alright. That's the kind of one of you. I don't want to pull with you. Before Josh jumps on Jacob, you said you had

a point about Black Widow. I did. I mean, I also want to pull with you before Josh Trump's on Jacob. You said you had a point about Black Widow. I did. I mean, I also want to say this since we're on Marvel. I just saw the movie Black Widow. 10 donors. What's up? What did you watch it on Disney Plus? Yeah, because I bought it. So, me and my nephew's all watched it together. I bought it so my meme, my nephew's all watched it together 40 something year old single man watching Disney plus my nephews That's what I would say they got all the Simpsons hey DJ Lou you don't have that for them You don't have this bus to you? No, no, because you're all about pussy, dude Did he bust you? No, no, because you're all about pussy, dude

Yeah, who's got time for watch black widow when it's when you're crushing pussy so hard Maybe like one of our crush pussy and they watch D2, you know, no Nobody wants to watch D2 anymore. It's about crushing pussy and that's all watching the Mets. Right Lou? Right on me. No. No. Crush and pussy. Watching the Mets. Writing fan letters to Stone Goddard. Gossard.

Gossard. Hey Stone, it's me again. What do you have here? It's, yeah, it's Lippie Lou from outside Team Deck again. Uh, me and my twin brother, we got one ticket, but we still need to get this lab. Yeah, it's it's lip-pilu from outside team that again. Uh, being my twin brother, we got one ticket, but we still need to have this lab. Is that okay?

Can we come in? Don't be weird about it. Don't be weird. Come on, Josh. She'll be coming on any minute. Oh, Jacob. I'd originally told him six, 10. So he's, Jacob, sorry.

I'm sorry. In the movie, you know, the character has no powers, no super powers. It's your point, Jacob. She's, she's a, she's a great spy. I love the character, but in this movie, well, is she even a great spy if everybody knows who she is? I see.

Yeah, she's phenomenal. Okay. No, no, I mean, she, she uses, she, she's great at, that's fine in getting people to reveal stuff. I like the character but in this movie She gets into two of the most horrific car crashes. I've ever seen two car crashes that would kill the Hulk Uh, and they just she just gets out coughing That sucks

And I can't take it. It drives me nuts. Again, maybe I'm getting too angry because I get older. But come on. This is the right amount of anger for a man. You're age to be yelling at Disney plus. Thank you. I couldn't even believe they made a movie about Black Widow.

I really couldn't. I was like, what now is a whole movie. Better superhero with no powers or a suit with no powers. Nothing. Just a just a really nothing really supernatural about what she's doing at all. It's just a just a hot chick who does karate. Well, also she literally falls off a building and hits everything on the way down. Splats on the floor on the concrete and then gets up coughing and runs It's I don't know she's always coughing

Everything she does we should every time she does she goes I have asthma Sorry about the coughing constantly I have asthma no, I did I rode that I rode that Clepsing building down the whole way. Yeah, that's well yesterday when I got home last night after spots I had put on spider-man homecoming was on and I got into it because I love I'm a big Michael Keaton guy as we all know Yeah, if the Keats on the TV it ain't going off if it's mr. Mom if it's gung ho If it's Batman forever or in this case spider-man homecoming, but it's Gung Ho, if it's Batman Forever, or in this case, Spider-Man Homecoming,

but he's just throwing Spider-Man through buildings in Spider-Man's like, that wasn't cool. You're just not. Yeah, I know, he has like spider strength, but I mean, he has spider durability because fucking splatter spider like nothing. That'd be a lot of fun. Yeah, he'd drop a spider most of the The time one of its legs is like

Maybe so funny if somebody threw spider-man against the wall he just splatted Then his credits roll in it out of here as a girlfriend going get it out and I'll see it Did anybody need help? There's got to be a playboy cartoon or something about spider-me getting hit with a shoe. Yeah Josh Adam Myers Is new place with a picture of Miles Davis so hips to girl suck you do I Got orange chairs and a brand new couch and I just got a new bed spread Dude I am killing it on the apartment front right now. I have every extra friend

I've ever lived with working on it Peyton a wall black tomorrow for accent Is it the wall behind you actually? It's in memory of the corn show that got canceled tonight. So, uh, way to bring it to the past. Well, an old Gaelic prayer says, uh, um, which wall, the wall behind you? I was a guy called me now, my eye. Which wall, the wall behind you? No, no, no, no, no, in the bedroom, dude,

because he is a deal. I got Tommy Lee's wife, my ex girlfriend, Brittany. We became homies recently because I needed her help with designing, because when we lived together, she does, I mean, dude, I was like a second year comic and she built this elaborate house that we lived in that she had like styled and stuff. And so I was like, yo, I just need recommendations

because, you know, I don't want this one to look like my shit hole in LA, which has had no real, you know, fucking. Should I say, Qua? If she's still funny. Yeah. Pardon? What was that body of yours? She's still funny. Yeah, pardon. She's still funny.

Jacob, you're talking about her. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Jacob just turned into every, Jacob just turned into every bonfire fan on Reddit against me. Just completely just hating. Yeah. I was like, how did I read the full credits? I stopped. If you go on Reddit, go to fun stuff on Reddit. I go go to the wrestling one and I go to all the little the nerdy shit That's why it's where you're seeing those hurtful things about wrestlers. It's guys sucks now. He really I was I will say before we switch topics here, I do want to say double think that black. I've painted walls black before in a house.

You think it's going to look cool, but it's kind of ugly a black wall. Do a color, do a color. Do a color wall. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it.

I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got switches? You send me some switches, dude. I need it. Dude, please, actually, we live like a block away. So you can bring them there. I have myself up for this. I would, you know what I'm gonna do.

I want to come in and ace. Want to let me go nuts. Let me just do a mural on the wall. If you saw my apartment, I'm gonna put it in the picture. This is called Bam, Bam, Bigelow Corner. Yeah, my apartment right now looks like Matthew McConaughey's in season one of True Detective. Are you walking? What are you? What's going on, Dan? You

didn't look came in? I go times flat circle yellow kings out there. Yellow kings. I um before we uh, I'm gonna get Josh up to speed on what's going on today And we should say that this is about to be our Wendy's what's fresh segment So what's fresh segment is all about me and Christine you want to know what you want to ask a question? What's fresh me and Christina fresh?

Because where we do not come together on land and see at C. We are just it was beautiful I I actually be honest with you I was surprised at how almost Olympic quality we were I'm not gonna I'm not gonna I don't have the time to dedicate to do this professionally but I did find out this day that I killed that I could do it professionally What me and Christine did is nothing short of amazing. We gave the footage to Lou just put together several videos so we just put it together and And now I like you to see on behalf of Wendy's and myself What's fresh

Big J and Christine getting down and I'm gonna tell you something. I'm shirtless in this under water several times. I Love this video is so fun And funny how great we are that I'm gonna allow a Picture of my floating gut to be out there in the world and I'm telling you it's my nightmare But this is good I put on a one piece, but I'm not a girl that puts the Keeney pictures or bathing suit pictures online I was very nervous as well Christine no one can even see you pass the globb of shit that is my torso, but I will tell you That this video is it speaks for itself. It's just speaks the only thing I saw was poetry and motion. Thank you

I haven't seen it Solvus no Josh is already posted it's posted to the bonfire What oh really? Oh, yeah, right? It's already on the Graham Lou posted it like right when we went live So it's fine. Oh, they play it. I want to watch a shit. Oh, I'm going to go home. Lou, black. How would you have panic if I was like, we're going to show this in house. We're not putting this out obviously, because I might be dumb. God, you just gone and deleted it because you knew you had to be a bunch of comments. Look at this tub of shit. And I'll

tweet it out and put it on Facebook as well. Oh, well, yeah, it's a bunch of comments. Look at this tub of shit. And I'll tweet it out and put it on Facebook as well. Oh, well, yeah, that's really get it out there. A lot of play. You're gonna get a little comments like, Jay, you're so brave with not wearing your tank top. I don't want that. I don't want that. Jay, so it's trending for brave.

Dude, I should have wore a fucking wet suit. No, dude, stop it. Um, let Jay, let the glob out. It is what it is. Sikernice with Jay Christine, please, if you would. On some volume. My bad. Yeah. I'm going to give you that one for free because of I just this is just reminding me how beautiful we were in this water together.

You might have to explain what's going on because it's just oh Yeah, oh yeah, it's just audio so it's entertaining J.N.A pool And this is you know, I'll explain why you enjoy We're now doing our arm routine Wait, I'll just play it straight through. Yeah, it's fine This is our arm routine. You can see a very choreographed thing. How about tell you this damn? How about if it? We it's not bad, dude. I'm not lying. That's kind of not bad. That's awesome. I thought it's pretty fantastic. I mean, that's pretty great That's fun. I'm high enough that that's very fun. Uh-huh. Look at us killing it Oh

Okay, that one put a bit more synchronized I would probably know what you lost it up a. No it wasn't. Yeah it's possible. Okay you guys are and your float is go. We are treading water as we speak. Okay because it looks like you're speaking right here. Yeah. What does it look like? Have a conversation with Fran on a floaty The arm work was just World class and then I worked a little bit a little Tussy Look at our feet never touching the bottom never tell you James Cameron to direct this because yeah Subshot I'm here. This is really the one this is what sends it all Surf's up

Surf's up dog. Oh I mean I watch his dismount watch his dismount Look how I flip did look at it and then and then then to close it all out Feet you look on the shoulders Christine jump at the end makes it honestly, I was gonna write you guys off for a lot of points But that really that really just secured your metal Yep, you heard her first. Yeah, that was great god damn by the way black glue I didn't look like as I thought But it was not good. Yeah black glue awesome job putting that together

together. Black. That was fantastic. The content from the guys, you know, thank you. Jake Christine. It's only wonderful. Why don't you couldn't tell by Christine's bathing suit, but she's a girl. I'm the guy. The only shot you have to worry about Jay is that underwater shot where it goes down. That's the only thing that's the only glop.

You look fit. No, I had to say that, Josh. God, Josh. God, Josh, you're in front of the video. I was like, I got my small tits? I mean, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God, Your body is awesome honestly very sensual You only look hey, you only look like a mushy pig for like five seconds Honestly at seconds 26 47 and a minute or three real bad stuff I got a shred out of here. I'd rather kill myself and live with that one part out in the world But you you I'm

Hey, if you're cool being part Jello, that's all right Dan I Would say for throwing this together at a small pool in Long Island I think they're pretty great. Yeah, you're great. I think you did really makes me feel like great about myself I Makes it makes me feel like great about myself. I would say that you in metal that's that was a Meddling performance you see Christine of my shoulders dude her trying to do the straddle kick and she was already in the water by the time She is she had no there's like I mean she was jumping she was jumping from the most like, unsteady surface. So it's like, that's why she couldn't get any lift.

But the fact that she tried, the fact that she tried to kick that, that we rehearsed that shoulder thing a lot, like two or three times, and I'm telling you at a point, after that one, I think that was the last one. Now it couldn't have been that one, because you would have seen it on camera. But after one of them, I like literally like, like an injured player went down. My shoulders were so sore. It was

like, you're a big soul. We're out of the water. When she's standing on my like, what is that? Your traps? She's standing on them. When we were out of the water for a couple seconds. And then we're pushing herself off to jump. It hurt. So I will say, none of them synchronized swimming did anything like that similar at all. So we probably did a harder routine, quite honestly. But you guys beat a judge. Well, my question is how much rehearsal did you have before you went on camera?

Welcome to improv, dude. Yes, and really? So you guys were just freestyle and the whole arm thing? before you went on camera. Fucking improv dude, yes and. Really? So you guys were just freestyle and the whole arm thing? No, we rehearsed for like two days before we did that. What? Jim Choreographer? Whoa, we've got to get arrested by Michael Jackson. Did he have it?

The jump, the jumping. There is a lot of times where the jump, like we just topple over on the jump. Oh Yeah, yeah Yeah, it was about Christine's bounce. She trusted me by the end Oh, she gave me her hoof and then we were able to pull off a lot of the moves most her hoof. What is it? The trust you trust your who Trust you trust you get it. We got to do a trust to the then we can film you trust

who do you trust me horse uh it's just funny thing as that's rehab shit right when you go to horse rehab rehab rehab where they have where they're at st. marina talk about that about how he was in a field learning how to pet a horse that's when he was getting clean to get the trust you to give him your hoof Give him can you can you imagine being a horse and having Dan Saint your main approach you What the Christ No, I'm saying him He blew out is it sound like a good

Yeah, it's blew out no You should pride Couldn't handle your booming voice It's shut up, Lou. There's a wonky equipment. You dan say in your main fucking destroyed it bro I saw coming. I was like I was like no, I was a no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no-Main fucking destroyed it, bro. Yeah, dude. I saw a comment. I was like, I was like, I was like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no move it. It's like oh No, it's turned off it's shut off. Is it plugged in? Yeah, dude It just shut off you just killed it

What did you see Lou had that read to you that's Exploded That's fucking wild Dan that's fucking wild Dan oh I think I'm coming back dude no oh no oh no oh no oh no

oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no I'm sure we take a break while they get to get a break while this stuff comes back. And then J you read the first read and already the last We'll come back and we'll ride this thing out to the bone Take to the band you want should we watch a guy get caught in an alligator cage or should we watch a fight at McDonald's

Fight at McDonald's. Yeah, always do the sucker fight at McDonald's fight in McDonald's yeah always do always do the suckers fight in McDonald's and I'll both do to McDonald's try to get a piece of the of the staff and then just gets to shit oh well people out there uh they're not gonna be nice about but enjoy that video of me and Christine it's great I wouldn't you know let no, be nice publicly and then sit with your girlfriend and show them how much better you are because you don't flop around in the water like a goddamn stingray and but but publicly be like you know what you stop it you're beautiful. Yes, you're so bad. No, no, no, you'll both easy very sensual It showed connection

Yeah, I'm talking a water as much as this was you were arguing in the first segment of the show I feel this was the real Jane That is the real Jane Christine. But the arguing was also real. And also we're not, that's not an argument. Do you think I can say that argument? That's me telling Christine facts about her awful shitty taste of music.

And then she threw out a few wild opinions about my music that no one understood. And we move forward. That's all. I'm right. She's wrong. Everyone moves on. It's not a big deal And every argument someone's got to be right someone's got to be wrong talk about a single single DJ. Lou come on, dude Let's go get some you're gonna keep listening to Franko. What did you say? You're gonna keep listening to Franko

No, I'm gonna be listening to luchier me on while we're fucking chicks together. Yeah, I get a J fuck a hard Cheer me on while we're fucking chicks together. Yeah, Jay fuck a lot. I Want you and will cheer me on these are the twins. I can't come unless they watch I Know you like to move your body you do dude I'm love we still take a break now. Yeah, you know back But then we can just get this out of the way and then we just have fun with our friend Josh for a while Yeah, we can just you know, you know, let me know about what angles that we're fucking clop a shit Underwater Hey, that was so brave of you Jay. I can't believe you did it and then you showed people I would die

Jay, you're the underwater Lizzo Bonfire You've been listening to serious XM's bonfire New episodes every Tuesday through Friday mornings and full shows always on SiriusXM.