The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - "Post-Comedy" Material and Bert Kreischer Takes Up Leather Making

Episode Date: September 10, 2018

The Bonfire welcomes back The Machine, Bert Kreischer, to the studio. Bert tells the guys that his therapist told him he needs hobbies and his decision to take up leather making and sailing. Then the crew discuss Vulture magazine's article on the new "Post-Comedy" era. Dan tries out his new tragically unfunny post-comedy material on Big Jay. Finally, Jacob gives DJ Lou a lesson on spelling pride.

You're listening to Comedy Central. Hey, I'm Big J.O. Persoon. And I'm Dan Soder, and you're listening to the Best of the Bond Fire. Stay tuned to hear some of our favorite moments from this week. You can listen to the Bond Fire Live every Monday through Thursday from 6th 8PM on Comedy Central Radio, Series XM95, or on demand on the Series XMF. Also, be sure to follow us on all social media at the bonfire SXM Joining us the third mic of the bonfire Bert Kreischer Yeah, the machine

Hangin out and welcome back home baby girl. I'm talking to you Andy Vandy Andy rejoins us home again to be back. I'm on the clock a hundred percent of the day I love my job, but it's like I don't have a hobby my therapist said he goes you need a hobby And I was like oh, I love my job. But it's like, I don't have a hobby. My therapist said, he goes, you need a hobby. And I was like, oh, I edit videos. And he goes, that's work. I said, I do a podcast. He goes, that's still work.

I go, well, no, I'm looking at properties. And he's like, to buy studios to make more videos. He's like, that's all fucking work. And so I took a leather working. And then I, and then I made a fanny pack. And it looked really bad at us. And I was like, I bet gonna get sell these at my shows. Yeah, so.

That was the last thing I thought you were gonna say. Hang out. Hang out. Pick up a CD or some of my local leather work. Hey guys, I'm gonna have a booth down past to the meet and greet with all my leather stuff. Guys, this weekend, bow ties? Yeah.

Bow ties. He's got pictures of saddle works that he's working on that you could buy Framing liver at a later date. Yeah, and he goes to pictures. These are four saddles I'm working on that are gonna be I can customize Oh, all of his bits are about heating up leather to work on it You're like Bert you've gone too far into the hobby. He goes hobby is now just work So I was getting some pussy down to tannery last week He goes what's up with hide that just won't stay? Am I right?

Oh, fucking girl, chaps you made yourself. Per walks around his own leather, like fucking Judas Priest. Get ready, get ready, it's the next one, get ready for the next one. So the lever didn't work out. OK. So my wife's like, for real, because I've been drinking a lot, like these last two weeks, she's like, for real, you need to get back into a hobby. And so on the plane. I watch this movie adrift and I realize

I'm buying a sailboat. No, dude. Please don't call my wife. I go I'm buying a sail, but I'm gonna learn how to sail It'll keep me sober on Sundays Dude, I first off I do a pro. I do like that you're gonna go turn into nautical bird Bill burns I just billbirds got helicopters. Yeah, he's got the Yeah, you're gonna be the seeds We're the centurions I love centurion the land rovers. Yeah, if you guys think about it You're the all things comedy Navy bird is the all things comedy air force

Al magical the all things comedy air force bro All magical the all things comedy army dude. I'm gonna start being the the sailing You know Bert has been sailing to all of his coastal gigs Which is a pretty weird god bird if I had to do it. I'm gonna go up the old But I also PCH there I want to say to you the cuff the whole time I want Charlotte coming up I'm not this vineyard But also bird I'm gonna say this to your face. Oh, hi everybody The machine

I'll be blowing your way this September and let's there's hurricanes Captain Burton Nekker chiff makes me so happy and I'm telling you this now that birds lay down the gauntlet I must become Doon buggy Post apocalyptic I'm gonna be dune buggy dad. Let's go post the pocket limping. You're gonna all my, you're gonna be like, I'll be running into dune bug.

Yeah, I'm gonna fuck you guys have your sand, handkerchiefs around your face. What's up with sand? It's just all dunes. Can you plug your, can you plug the microphone into my robotic half-on please? Please. Dude, Jay and I is the fire and post the

pocket limping comedy team. team dating in the apocalypse is weird Yeah, it doesn't really work as good if you actually saw all your own shotgun You ever get somebody from not your tribe spin the cash by the maid sawdough What's up with water? Why isn't so delicious What's up with water? Why isn't so delicious? We're in post comedy now I've told yeah my vulture magazine more in post comedy They know what it is. Yeah comedy is now It's all about it's not having punchlines. It's all about yes. Oh, fuck doing a weird con punchlines it's all about yes oh fuck doing a weird con fuck up my something high concept for years just chasing those punchlines turns out high

concepts expiration you just did comedy at a theater in front of fans dude like a boring asshole dude with punchlines and tags what a privilege and white why do you see how many jokes you can get in free-fall skydive I like that I like that I want to do a show to show people how important comedy is. I want to do what we did in the elevator for a TV show. Oh yeah. We just like comedy in real-place strangers who are straight faced and you just make them laugh in real life. And you go. And because like one of the things I'm really really good at in life is I can make someone smile Yeah, like I can like I and it's almost like a game I play with myself But if I go to buy groceries or whatever I always try to make a joke to make the person smile and like that's what this new Vulture article saying is this comedy doesn't need to be funny But friendliness and and and relatability and con there's still a big value to comedy my best compliment either

Jeannie Turbo is our neighbor, our kids or friends, her father passed away. And she was in a really bad place for like four months. I didn't know about my wife. I had heard that her dad didn't really put any value in it. My ex had one. Me.

I do a show at Irvine. They all come down. And she gets done and she's crying. She comes up to me and she goes, I haven't laughed in four months. I haven't thought about anything other than my dad. And you took me out of that for a second. And I went, really, she goes, I haven't laughed in four months. I haven't thought about anything other than my dad and you took me out of that for a second. And then it went, really?

She goes, I needed that. And she told every one of her friends, then fuck Vulture, that's what comedy is. But I think laughing is a shared experience. It's like something where if you do it, you're like, like everyone in that elevator laugh being laughing me like, yeah, that's fine. We all know this is fun.

And then it's like for this to be like, you know what, it's not about fun anymore. It's about thinking. And you're like, cool, then it's not comedy. That's not, that we're doing. I think, I mean, you look at the headline, the headline, it says how funny does comedy need to be. I mean, it we're almost like, maybe we're reading into this. No, I read it. I read it. I read it. How many specials aren't that funny? Oh, they're like, oh, you guys aren't that funny. And I guess it doesn't need to be that funny. Let me tell you right now, I would be fucking mortified if I put out a special and it was in the example

of not being funny, but putting it in the game. It's just the quote. They're saying it's great, but they're saying it's great. How? I don't care. I don't care. You're not that funny. Right now, if they listed the names,

like they're like Michael Drew's, Nannette, all the people who don't have funny comedy specials, that's at the point they're making is that it doesn't need to be funny. Like, er, er, er, it's true Michael's even a Santa special, that's what they're saying. And I've seen parts of it, it's different,

it's interesting, I didn't laugh a ton, but that's what the point they're making. I'm not sure to hurt right now, there would be end, J.O. Chris and, if they're like, I was trying to be funny. Yeah, it would hurt more if you were giving it a whirl. Oh, fuck. Dude, if you were giving it a whirl.

But I think all these people are people that did want that, but were absolutely willing to accept this. Yeah. I don't know if Drew Michaels. I don't know if Drew Michaels, I do think for sure. I wanted to make something different. But I think he wanted it to be like people think it was hilarious But I think he cares more if it makes him famous and if it's a hilarious piece and Hannah Gatsby though like I don't think she

What cares? I don't know I don't think she was going for funny in a lot of the thing Well, there is a thing of like it's there's there's This unnecessary coolness to comedy right now. We are like comedy's not cool It's supposed to be just like fun and you're just talking shit and making each other like I don't know That's at least what my I always liked comedy is like that's just funny No matter who they are you could see any kind of comic if they make you laugh you're like either funny That's fun that is funny. So to say like comedy doesn't need to be funny You're like so it just doesn't need to be the thing it is. It's just not comedy

It's fine that they say this, now they think, but it's fine that they say this so that you go, yeah, it doesn't need to be funny. If you want to do that, definitely do that. I probably won't go see it. We definitely do that. Yeah, sure. And if that connects with you,

if you're a transgendered or a lesbian or a gay dude, trying to figure out life and, and the net made you feel more than, like that woman Jeannie to come to my show. Yeah, absolutely. That's the thing that can the fuck yeah. Yeah, absolutely. I'm not saying that.

Yeah, I'm saying stop this from happening. They shouldn't at all. But I'm saying what they shouldn't do is kind of hold us up to be like now. They say this is the benchmark. What are you gonna let me just make people laugh with Joe? That's the problem.

It's fine. If you can connect with any of these specials, then fuck yeah, go get it and enjoy it and live it up. But if you're telling like, it's like they built a faulty house and they're just telling other architects, like you build houses like this now and you're like, yeah, we know that's not the way to do it though. And they're like, no, you gotta fucking do it that way.

That's a weird place to come from. And that's what I wanted. And that's what I wanted. And that's what I wanted. And that's what I wanted, like a special, like the whole thing's like, like, laugh at my pain or whatever it is. But I don't recall it, but I don't think the specials any moment where he drops the lights down the blue view and goes like

Father passed away 19 years today. That's my I Think about him every day. Oh, you know, it's like there was no moment like that. It's just kept being jokes Do we just you know what I think they're saying and this is my my takeaway from all this and this is my takeaway from all this. Ninnette was saying, I'm done with hack gay comics. Yeah. Gay comics had just, I think, if I'm not mistaken. Like, I'm for hack rape comics. I don't know.

But I think that that was more of a slam on hacky comics, meaning like, don't just go up and go, I'm gay, you know what that means? And then, duh, duh, duh, I don't know, I'm not, I mean, that's getting nice and big too though. There's a nice, what this is done, all this shit is done right here is Mike all started through the fucking wall. And then all that bullshit, hello everybody, this is me, is fucking walking right behind that hole in the line Yeah, and they're going like please yes, I'll feel better about myself if I really laugh hard at this There's only two categories you can be lumped in now. Oh, that's what sucks about this fucking world There's no nuance. There's no due process. There's no post comedy guys. Let's get rid let's get down

Are you guys ready to cry He had the whole crowd sobbing that's what it turns to newer. I'm like he died I'm like dude so does killing in post comedy He's the fucking Eddie Murphy of sad comedy I go and then I came home from high school and my sister had left a letter on my pillow. Three of these letters she was killing the car accident. I do have something I feel is important and I need to bring the both of you in. Okay. It involves pride. You write scripts, Stan, right? Yeah, they never get made.

All right, but would you hand one in with grammatical errors? No. Now, you take pride, it would be embarrassing. Yeah, absolutely. I feel stupid. I want to talk about lose spelling of the PDT, the title, the radio title. What is that? Terrific.

It's what we title our segments. Yeah. Black, blue, or white, blue? It's what we title our segments. Yeah Black Lou or white Lou. It's mainly you. I've actually corrected Lou in the past I hasn't made a mistake in a long time. Yeah, although, but that's a short period. That's a short period calls them That's what we call now L.J. not black Lou Lou. How do you spell jiggleos? I Don't give a flying this is what I'm talking about. Jacob suck my cock. Yeah, I don't give a fuck. Here's his radio anger.

He's jammed up. Yeah, fuck you, bro. Don't come at me with your stupid fucking eating fried in the show. How do you spell suck my dick? I know how to spell it. You know what? YouTube got a lot of tension, and this

has been boiling up for a while, so I'm glad we're finally at this point, because I think we can According to Lou, I'm sorry to cut you off jiggle osu spelled J I G G L A L OS well and Ferris he did spell jiggle osu I mean he did He nailed it

That was like a week ago you've been sitting on this fucking paper for a long time. I can't always catch it I knew it started with a G. I may have even thrown an extra G in the middle of it. I definitely throw it I may have made it gigalose gigalose. I definitely would have made a gig I love so I think Loon got any more brain busters. How about one of my all-time favorites when you were talking about the difference between waffle house versus denies. Oh, daddy only want why put two ends when you can only you are a wait a second. You are a white little man. Here's one. Here's one of no for understanding and this does make it fun here. I'm so I think I

understand what you're saying now when someone's listening to this on the radio. You're seeing this, when someone's listening to this on the radio, and the segments. That's what aired all last time. I mean, all right. You know what, that's a big little thing. You take Jacob's side all you want. I'm gonna take Lou's side, because you spell words like a cool kid.

Yeah. I didn't spell that. I didn't spell that. He's spelled in the Lew whiskey way. Like truth is now TRUF. So hopefully no one's, Jacob's saying that what if somebody wants to search for a segment online and they can't because they don't know how to spell retard.

I didn't spell that Denny's by the way, Jacob. That's, well, that's BL is. LJ? Yeah, that's LJ, sorry. But I don't know if you know this, but LJ's got a guy in his corner that almost knocked out Mike Tyson and wrote thriller. Yeah, dude, I don't really know if you know this but LG's got a guy in his corner that almost knocked out Mike Tyson and wrote thriller Yeah, I don't really know if you want to park up that tree

I'm not gonna give you that one because that was black blue, but I cut that before But you're really starting to war with the lose, but jiggle, but jiggle. Oh, LJ You're not gonna like what's going on in here because I have brought it up off the air and Lou told me suck my dick Well, he did it all and then he said my favorite. I'm a radio guy. I'm not a speller. Something like that.

He feels the music. I do audio. I do audio guy. I'm a radio guy. I'm not a speller. It's not a great quote. Why is he trying to spell it? It's a well, I take that back.

He loads it. It's a fantastic quote, but it's nonsensical to say the least. It does sound like the rings of a crazy person. Hey, it's Big J. O'Grasson and I hope you enjoyed this week's Best of the Bond Fire. You can listen to the show live every Monday through Thursday from 6th to 8 p.m. Eastern on Comedy Central Radio, Series XM 95 or on demand on the Series XMF. Be sure to follow us on social media at the Bond Fire at 6M. media at the bonfire at sexism.