The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Pump and Dump

Episode Date: December 18, 2024

Jay goes to a Wu-Tang Clan show and Justin Silver flakes out on attending. Jay calls him to verify his excuse. Bob teaches Jay about Sniffies which is a site that just shows the bodies of hot men and not their faces. The term "pump and dump" is used and Bob educates the listeners about its meaning. Jay and Christine reveal that they are moving to New Jersey. UFO drones are spotted flying in the Garden State and campers call in with their theories. *To hear the full show to go www.siriusxm.com/bonfire to learn more FOLLOW THE CREW ON SOCIAL MEDIA: @thebonfiresxm @louisjohnson @christinemevans @bigjayoakerson @robertkellylive @louwitzkee @jjbwolfSubscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ on Apple Podcasts to listen to new episodes ad-free and a whole week early.

And now the bonfire with big Jay Okerson and Robert Kelly Who tank forever who takes the kids? Bonfire faction talks here 6103 chop cheese is ruining our lives Nothing looks better than having your headphones wrapped up in a sandwich wrapper. Just all fucking tangled up with a sandwich. God damn it, I'm tangled in a sandwich again. This is Wu Tang, Fourth Chamber I believe it's called. Off of Enter the 36 Chambers, the original.

Right? That's correct. But, me and Christine, I didn't mean to talk about that. Enter the 36 chambers the original right? Yeah, that's a correct, but Me and Christine I didn't talk about that me and Christine Josh Eddermeyers went to go see Ghost face Ray Kwan and the Jizza on the day before my birthday Friday night. Happy birthday, buddy Thank you. What'd you do for your birthday? Nothing. I got you a Christmas birthday present. Yeah, Dean present Yeah, it's all in one. And a Christine? Nice.

Well, it's everything. I love it. And you're going to love it. I'm excited. Very excited about it. So yeah, the day before my birthday, we went to this concert. Justin was supposed to go.

I'm going to teach you how to use it, though. OK. I'm going to have to come over and teach you. A handgun? No, it's not a handgun. I would never give you a handgun What is it a pocket pussy? No, it's not a party. Show me don't tell me I have a show me you have a pocket pussy at your house Christine. Yeah

She's your pussy Yeah, we went to go see what you say we went we went to go see Trying to guess what it was behind cheese back You'll never guess don't guess but the love a guess but on Friday night We got tickets. We went to go see a judge with Josh Edemeyer's says ghost face Ray Kwon Jizza Justin Silver was supposed to go. This is one of my favorite You know what when someone's making that I can't go or I forgot to get a ticket or something

I told him I was like hey my for my birthday. We're going you say you love Wu Tang, dude, like Three members of Wu Tang performed right out back of my house. Wow terminal five. He's like He's like, yeah, dude. That sounds awesome. And then a day of He's like he goes dude. I because I'm sorry. I didn't buy a ticket I'm not able to go tonight I forgot I signed up for something just something I signed up for something he didn't tell you what it was no in fact if you called him on the line right now we can't give any kind of notice you'd say have him call in it's a

waste of time I'll just call if you get immediately and be like he goes dude what's that thing you signed up for you couldn't go to the concert for all right, and then I promise you if it goes if he goes, um It's already a lie. So if we get an arm, he's lying if it starts with arm. It's a lie Because it's fucking bullshit. Thank you, Jay. Here he goes Who would you ringing your right? It's by the way what? Yes off to do jizz's album. Yeah By the way what this is off the liquid sword. Oh, yes off the jizzes album. Yeah, damn it. I Blew it he's not gonna answer. He's napping. I don't sleep. Well, I'm riding the dogs

Hey Justin you're live on the bonfire Hey, what did you sign up for this last weekend? What would you sign up for? Oh, that would be none of your business Good answer Wow, that's a good bullshit answer. I mean Jay told me you signed up for something I was like what he's saying. I don't know Yes, I love this inside like this crypto trading thing What this crypto trading thing that I'm doing. Mm-hmm. What? This crypto trading thing that I'm doing. With the Huck Tool Girl? What? Huh? Well, he doesn't know who Huck Tool Girl is.

I don't know who that is. I'm trying to buy a fucking, I'm trying to, listen, Jay's not moving to fucking Jersey and leaving me in this city, all right? I'm moving to that goddamn neighborhood too. You're moving to near Jay? Yeah. So, I need to flip some fucking coin here,

which means maybe I don't see Wu Tang and I just deal with this shit. Why are you moving to where Jay is? Because you think I'm gonna let him leave me? Is there something going on I don't know about? Yeah. There's nothing going on. You think I'm gonna let him fucking just like leave this shit?

He's not just gonna be ignored, Bobby. I'm not gonna be ignored, Dan. Yeah, he's gonna cook Dawkins in a big cauldron. First of all, hey, Justin. That's from, that's from Fatal Traction. Don't ever call me fucking Dan ever again. I didn't call you Dan. That's from Fatal Traction.

We don't mention that name. Oh no, it is from the movie, but it is great that it was Dan. I'm not just gonna be ignored, Bobby. Hey, listen. Well, I moved out of out of the city didn't move where I fucking moved You and I are close but me and Jay like lay in bed together sometimes What we I didn't know you wanted to lay in bed with me I didn't know that I ever see relationship with J's girlfriend We have a whole thing going on

What you have a doggy relationship with Christine? It's beyond dogs What do you guys talk about you guys you guys girl gab you guys girl gab you two little quims mewling all weekend We don't maybe we'll discuss swatches for couches. Maybe we will daddy's daddy's off earning Do you guys do feet like massages on each other and do each other's cuticles and put little face masks on? Daddy's off turning on. You're not gay? No. Tell it to Christine's unfucked pussy.

Ha ha ha ha. Have you guys ever taken a nap together? I don't think so, no. Okay. All right. So you did a crypto thing. Me and Jay or me and Christine? Me and Jay taking a nap together or Christine taking a nap?

I know you napped with that teddy bear before. I napped with the teddy bear. You napped. I would nap with him too. I have boundaries with Christine. I'm very good about that. Okay. All right.

Well, all right. Well, no, that's it. We just wanted to see what the hell you missed a reunion of most of Wu Tang for no No, no, I know but I signed up for this thing and I was like fuck, you know, I've already paid for it So, you know, all right, buddy. Well, did you have fun in your class? Evening crypto. Yeah, what was it a Friday Friday evening crypto Friday? crypto? Yeah, what was it? A Friday night?

A Friday evening crypto? A Friday evening crypto? Well, no, no, no, no, no, no. So it's in another, so it takes place in another country, so the times are always a little fucked up. What country? What the fuck are you doing, dude? Australia.

What's going on, dude? So some day, it's like they start late, it's on fucking weekends, it's a whole, I'm committed, man. Do me a favor, look up Australia time right now. What time is it in Australia? It's tomorrow. It's Australia? It's tomorrow. It's tomorrow. It's tomorrow.

But what time tomorrow? Seven o'clock. Seven o'clock, what time is it in Australia at seven o'clock? Nine a.m. So it's nine a.m. right now? Nine a.m. tomorrow. So it'll be 11. It's nine a.m. tomorrow.

It'll be 11. When he did the class, it would be 11 a.m. in Australia. Wait, are you fact checking me to make sure I wasn't lying to you? Eight o'clock. I'm sick of this shit. It'd be 11 when he did the class it would be 11 a.m. In Australia Yeah, why you sick of this shit like the lack of trust as if like we know like this is absurd It's not absurd. We can go to a farm like three times a year. We don't know you do up there Okay, you do some weird shit that we're trying to figure out Justin you do Weird shit, I do I'm you I'm very forthcoming and open. I don't lie to anybody in this family. All right, okay.

Signed up for a thing. You know, I'm not a fan, Justin. Ooh, well, Peter Cain doesn't agree. Is Jacob there? Jacob's right here. I'm here. Do you understand what I'm saying here with this? With the, like, let's just double check

to make sure Justin's not, you know what I'm saying? Yes, no? Not really. No, he does not. It's Jacob. Oh, great not you know what I'm saying yes no not really no he does Jacob I have no friends here yeah we love you dude that's why we're concerned about that's why I wanted you to come to watch three members of the Wu-Tang Clan on his birthday on my birthday no less Jay I called you three times I felt bad about it I called you I texted you I texted you again you didn't get back to me I felt bad about it. I called you I texted you I texted you again You didn't get back to me. I felt bad about it cuz I was like fuck I did this way before then and I didn't realize until I went to buy the tickets is like shit

Well, same night is this thing that I hope you have a good time buying Australian bitcoins Coins are not they're not there's no such thing as a big coin dingo coin centralized currency Jay. What is it? What kind of coin is it? I'm not gonna talk to you. I'll house corn why why can't we we can't get in on the Bitcoin? I didn't sign up for the thing Bobby. You can call me off the air. Is it something that you're creating? No, I mean Bobby. Oh fucking mo coin eating a Bitcoin. So what so you're investing is it called fake coin? Yes Is it gay? fake coin sissy crap

All right, well, it's a good. What's a good? What's a good British? Okay? Poofta poof the coin poof the coin poof coin is fanook fanook coin So no, that's Canadian. All right. So all right. So you did a crypto. How long was the class? Two hours, two hours. Wow. That's a lot.

So you sat in your house on a zoom call for two hours learning things. No, it wasn't a zoom call. It was part of this like back end forum thing. So it shows through it streams like through their back end thing. It wasn't zoom back end. nice nice back-end coin so did you did you make money did you did you do what you were supposed to do I told you what I'm doing right no no whatever house is next to Jay's house is going to be my house if there's people in there I will buy them out and they will work for me as

slaves that's what's going on from kangaroo I'm at that certain level of House is going to be my house People in there I will buy them out and they will work for me as slaves That's what's going on from kangaroo. I'm at that certain level of income. You will be the first to know simply from Vegemite coin Yeah, oh you mean the that's not a knife this is a knife coin This fosters Australian for coin? Oh fuck, you got it right before me, I was going to say it's Foster's, it's Australian for Bitcoin. Australian for coin? God damn it, I was taking a sip of my drink. I had the thought though. So listen, so you took a course for a couple hours on a Friday night and you're trying

to buy the house next to Jay's, and that's where you're gonna live. I don't know where the word trying is in this vocabulary. I am doing. You're buying? There's no trying, Bobby. There's only doing. Are you gonna build like ditty tunnels?

No, I want him to have a window that he could stand in at night and stare at me and Christine sleep. You wake up and- While he sits in a rocking chair. But yeah like an attic window, almost like the Amityville window and I want you sitting in there and constantly turning a light on and off while you stare at us. I get it, like the window in the movie Psycho, like the triangle windows.

Yeah, Amityville, the Amityville windows. I would say the crow window. Sure, the crow window. It's big. Whatever it is, I just want him turning a light on and off constantly while he stares at me and Christine's sleeps. In a rocking chair naked. Yeah.

You're going to wake up in the middle of the night while you're sleeping. She's going to be flicking her bean in the window to that. Probably. Yeah. I'm going to road a lot. I don't know. You dumped me?

I'm trying to fuck Justin. He's right next door. You might as well. Yeah, you might as well fuck Justin. You might as well. All right, Justin. I'm rooting for you, buddy I hope that your Australian coin thing goes good. Yeah, dude If it makes you feel any better they weren't very they weren't very good Well the Australian stream coin. Yeah, Australian back-end stream Australian back-end coin. Do you have to use a rain stick when you sell it? Australian back-end stream Australian back-end coin. Do you have to use a rain stick when you sell it?

Did you redo coin a didgeridoo how many didgeridoo are there well, there's 40 set didgeridoos And then it's you're getting a percentage of those Now you understand Bitcoin Well, we love you buddy buddy. Look forward to your millions. Look forward to your millions and your new house. And congratulations. The new house, the house next door to me is too stoked. And we'll see you in the studio soon. Come in soon.

No, I'd love to. I'll come in soon. Well, don't sign up for anything. Bye. Bye. I mean. Y'all bomba zumba, bomba zay coin. That still didn't clear anything out. Hey get yourself some coin

I took a back-end course in a room. Yeah back in seems like it sounds like couldn't streamed at any time You know watch it if he paid for he could have watched it when is it done Could he as we should ask could you not watch it now? Could you not rewatch it now? Of course you could you paid for it? Yeah He had to do it like the live version that wasn't live. It was a pre-recorded thing. He didn't want to go he forgot to buy a ticket. I percent and he got Jewish he has an only He's on dicks and butts. He's on sniffies. Oh for sure He was doing a pump and dump that night to make extra cash man speaking of that when I was leaving skanks last night

I know when I was talking to Leaving skanks last night this couple came up to me and the girl was Like she goes. Oh my god. She goes I do a porn and But like cam stuff and it's like whenever I when there's downtime I always like tell people like listen to the bonfire and listen to blah blah blah I'm like, oh awesome I go Where do I find that and just eight times when she tried to say it just someone was coming up And she and I would just hear like blah blah blah cam soda

Then by blue neem on cam soda blah blah blah, but jerk mate They live less and I was like no I walked out and not having any idea god damn it no idea whatsoever but I was Trying to discreetly say where can I watch your pornography while I shake hands with your boyfriend who loves me? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha and it has the map. And it's like the disgusting grinder. This grinder. And then there's sniffies where it's just, they do the pump and dump. Where-

Oh, this is just like to fucking leave. Yeah, I will just be like, do it, I'm doing a pump and dump Friday night at my apartment and you can sign up and just go and pump and dump. Oh, I like that. You don't see the person, the people's faces? Dicks and butts. It's just dicks and butts.

The pictures? Yeah, it's just dicks and but you didn't bring it up No, we can't she you can why can't you? I don't know. She couldn't it's a block It's a block. She's just blocked particularly blocked from this thing. That means something's going on funny up top. It's it's a Location. Oh, you have to stop Jim. Did they have to stop Jim McClure Jim McClure Is it officially true that you've been going on sniffies so much today That they fucking blocked it on all computers here, but you can't be trusted There goes Jim doing coke off a hooker's pussy again

I bet you could I bet if you found out exactly where Justin is right now He his dick a butt would be on sniffies. Oh absolutely his little I recognize his wiener. Oh you would yeah I'm gonna picture my phone of it. We could do that. I wish we get on Sniffy's right now, because you can look and see their wiener and guess if it's them. Oh, I do. You know where he lives.

Yeah, for sure. Right, so if his... He lives in the gayest part of New York City. He lives in Chelsea? Yeah. Bobby, what if it's great body, no face? You don't know until they show up? Oh, I know Justin's dick

He's presenting what he's what do you mean? You're saying they only see I love your fake inquisitiveness Now if somebody if some lunatic was to go on this site looking for some late-night cock What do you think would you be able to notice the? I'm just saying no one this well I'm just wondering if someone was to go on this guys want to go on there if somebody was gonna go on and not show their face Yeah, just show their dick or butt Do you know the gay men sex thing like? My asshole this guy's wearing white tighty whitey's he's got a great body I'll tell you this if I was getting crammed up my shitter constantly and that hole was all damaged up like that

Of all times I wouldn't wear white Form fitting underwear it would be this time. Yeah, but guy gay guys, dude. Keep their asshole pristine so do I Like I said gay guys. Oh, that's keep their asshole pristine. Oh guys gotta be gay just because he loves a clean asshole Just as I like to sometimes finger my own ass before I eat a sandwich. Okay. Then you wonder why you have shit in your pants. I'm fine.

I mean, I wouldn't go on a website with women that only show neck down. Why? Because you don't know how they look. What do you mean? Because you're looking at the... Well, this is a pump and dump site, so it doesn't really matter. If the girl's jacked face and it's nice body, you're just there to fuck anyway. Yeah, you're not there to kiss and talk.

You get pump and dump and move on. Go get a sandwich. So what difference would it make? Yeah, what do you care? His face is... His face is... I'd be more sad on sniffies because I would do better with my face than I would with my asshole and fucking dick.

Some of the dicks on there. Oh, yeah, I show a little top to see like this though. Hey do top to see a little top to see Look at that my little my little fucking butt cleavage three-quarter to see yeah Gay guys that guy's ass crack looks like fucking Dolly Parton's tit cleavers, dude. It comes in from both sides. I mean, gay guys have nice asses. Well, yeah, you said they have to, remember? Yeah. I just don't like the little tusk of hair coming out of the top of it. Why not?

I wish you could... I don't know, because it looks like an upside down pussy. I don't like it. It really does. Christine, please... Is that Sniffy's? Keep scrolling down, please. Scroll down, scroll down.

Well, we're at Sniffy's on Instagram. Apparently you can go there and you can check out all the... Sniffy's and my Instagram. It really does is that team please is that sniffing scrolling down, please? Go down scroll that well, we're at sniffies on Instagram I get apparently can go there and you can check out all these in my hometown sniffies. Yeah, there you go Here we go. Here we go. Whoa In this house every day is cake. It says was a man's fucking buttless Thing question. Why was the need for jockstrap to be assless? Is it so you can protect your dick and balls and get fucked in the ass at the same time?

Because I don't understand why there was no, I never understood it when I had to wear it. I would wear, as a lot of people did, I would wear underwear under them, for sure, but it's a stupid fucking concept. Well, because you didn't have to wear double underwear. Well, what is the? No, but why don't they just have,

I bet there's underwear you could just fucking put the cup... Because if it was underwear, it needs to attach... The cup needs to attach firmly. It's just the pocket in the front. It needs to... But it attaches firmly to the balls and penis, so there's no... If it was an underwear, there'd be a little gap on the bottom. Dude, you're so pro jockstrap.

Yeah. Yeah. My name was pro jockstrap Kelly. Jockstrap Bob pro jockstrap. Yeah, yeah. My name is pro jockstrap Kelly. Jockstrap Bob. Jockstrap Bob in high school. I remember your years as jockstrap Bob, Boston University's premier radio DJ. Yeah, dude, you would have to,

it keeps the cup up and tight. Bobby, I'm sorry, I'm trying to talk the world out of hiding men's butts in locker rooms. I know you live for this. Have you guys ever come across this guy at all? Of course. What's this guy? No, I haven't.

But I mean, like, you know, emotionally. He's a workout guy. He's just got this huge ass. I don't know if it's fake or what, but I mean, he's got to be gay. What's his name? Oh my god, he's sweating through it. Nunzi?

Nunzi? Yeah, it's like N-U-N-Z-Z-I-I-I. I thought he was on, this is TikTok, I thought he was on Instagram. Now you said have we come across him, Christine, asking that because I assume, have you come across him? Wow!

Well, describe what we're seeing. The gayest, muscleiest guy, the gayest guy in the world that you're not gonna call me F word to his face. He's wearing yoga everything. Yeah, for sure. From top to bottom and his ass. No, he dresses like a lady. He wears pastel yoga pants. He, for sure. From top to bottom and his ass. No, he dresses like a lady.

He wears pastel yoga pants. He dresses in women's workout clothes. But I've never seen a butt like that on a man. Yeah, me neither. Well, because no man dresses like that. You're not supposed to. He's wearing like the pants that the line touches his asshole. No, it's those kind.

It's those Lululemons. Some brand does that where they actually have have it's like oh the scrunch It like does circles like around your ass crack He has no body fat those zero body fat all muscle and his ass if you did if you saw him from the waist down That's a woman's ass Ladies I'll tell you this Whatever this guy is whatever he his pronouns are, his things, badass, you put your dick in it, you're coming.

I mean, I don't know. I'm saying if you're against this, if you're homophobic, if you're anti-gay, you put your dick inside that butt right there, you're finished. But you put your dick inside that butt at any angle you're coming from the top. Oh yeah. If I, you're right. If I'd like hold his an, here's what I'm picturing, he's sort of on his side, all right Bobby picture this, yeah, he's sort of on his side, right, yeah, like he's laying like this, yeah, and I've got this ankle way up in the air and I'm giving the biz this direction, seeing with every pump his dick and balls that are laying on

this leg moving and I'm not into that. I don't play that gay shit Bob you know that about me. Of course you don't. I'm straight through and through but I'll tell you this right now even in that position. You're coming. I'm coming. You're coming. I'm coming. If I was coming from the other side up at the top of his where his back meets his crack and I just put my helmet in the top while you were coming on the other side. Got you. I would, I'm coming. You're still gonna come. I'm coming that way. Absolutely.

I'm gonna come that way. If we both find ourselves at the same time inside of this guy, here's what I'm picturing. I named this move a long time ago. It's called 9-11 the fall of the Twin Towers. Me and you scissor like this and then our dicks mush up like that. And then that's the Twin Towers. And then he comes down sitting on them. Where now, one of the four walls that is touching, that is housing my penis, is your penis.

One of those four walls is your penis. And this guy, the other three are this guy's inner asshole. Yeah. I'm coming. I'm coming on you. I'm still coming. I'm gonna come on your cum. Oh, absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. It on you. I'm still coming. I'm gonna come on your come. Oh, absolutely.

Yeah. Yeah. Why, you're gonna, it's gonna be, it's gonna look like one of those ice creams, those vanilla and chocolate ice creams. Oh, and if you finish first and pull out, I'm just gonna feel bad. I'm like, damn, did I feel bad? It's like how me and Christine say we feel

if one of us finishes our burger first, the person who still has burger left, you're jealous of them. It's the same thing, you know what I mean? I love that you couldn't equate it to sex. Yeah, you come, you come and then you dip out and then you're gonna be sitting there on the sidelines going, Damn, why did I come so fast? And I'm gonna even be like, Damn, did I miss Bobby's dick in here with me?

We could just come out together. Yeah, no, I'm not gay. Oh yeah, you're right. So fucking come out of what? That is gay. What are you talking about? I just got crazy, that's all. I'm not coming at the same time as you dude. I'm not some fucking queer. I hate this guy. By the way I hate this guy for

like the wrong... this is like when I see this this goes I'm very liberal with all this kind of stuff but I go oh this guy makes me hate gays and I don't even know if he's gay but he has to be right right? This guy makes me wanna be gay. Does he really? I mean dude, that's a girl ass. It's a waste if he's not gay. Oh God. Oh, you can see Matthew Lane right between those bad boys.

Jesus Christ. Don does not have an ass like that. Nobody does, I don't know how it's real. I think it's fake and he works out. I think he got a lift. It doesn't look fake Steve Byrne has a better any works out Steve Byrne's face is better than Don's ass Stand up turn around and bend over yeah, you like that. Don't you Jacob? I mean this guy's fucking nutbag in those fucking girl pants is crazy And there's nobody else

Shoes good good good I think Christine flicks being to this house This is exactly by the way This is what her old gay best friend looks like now and she probably looks And she had a crush on him when they were younger since Christine's flicking being like but my investigative skills are unbelievable Show up show the video show the picture your friend She's flicking her being the hocus pocus she flicks being to this you think she likes this and A lady who exercises with a bald head who calls herself a guy girl.

I'm telling you right now, Christine and Dawn, when we're gone, when we die, which we will die soon, they're both becoming lesbians. No. You know what Christine's gonna, Dawn's definitely dyin' out. I think Christine's going asexual. I don't know if she's gonna do either thing.

I think Dawn's gonna try to get Christine. I think Dawn's gonna come over with a fucking quiche. That's very, very possible. The dog's gonna be friendly. By the way, look, this is Christine's crush. What the fuck is that? That's her gay friend, Crush. How did you go from Jay to that?

The other one. Huh? That's like the exact opposite sides of the spectrum. Yeah, well, he's not fucking her. He's on a chubby ball kid. He's not fucking her. Did he ever try to fuck you? No, no, he's a friend whose house I used to sleep at all the time because he was so obviously

gay. Like wasn't it? He was going to try to fuck her till he finished. She was a girl. Did he talk again? Yeah, he had the gay accent. Yeah. Christine, I love pussy. Just not yours. Just not yours. So when you were a kid, was he in that shape? No, he was just a little thing? No, no, no.

This is recent. So you knew him as a little boy. He liked him when he was fat like me. My new book, Everybody Fat Like Me. He was my roommate when I first moved to the city. It's an emmita book. Little fat cow. Little fat cow.

Is this the guy that had gay rabbis come over? No, but he's brought that guy to Christmas. It was his friend that used to give, he was like a big fat guy, and he would give the gay naked massages to the Hasidics. Not exclusively to Hasidics, but they were part of his clientele. So Hasidics, the Hasidic guys were gay.

Yeah, we let them do it because they get to suck baby birds. You know what I mean? You got to suck the blood out of the baby birds. So he would jerk these guys, like he would suck these guys. Just give gay naked massages. What's a gay naked massage? Well, he's gay and he would be naked.

Massaging. So he didn't touch their dude. He goes, my masseuse was a gay man. Was it gay? He goes, no. Maybe he must have jerked him off. That must have been part of the thing. Sucker cocks.

Bing. That would be the gay part. If you get a massage by a guy, it's not gay. I'm assuming. If a guy's getting a massage by a naked man. Oh, he's naked? Yeah. That's gay? No, why?. Oh, he's naked. Yeah, that's gay

No, why? So if a guy's naked and give me a massage that's gay I think if you're a man getting massaged by a naked man Questionable. Okay, let me ask you question I don't know if my straight father would do that What have you know levels of straight? Your father asked me to leave when I came in nakedness if you wanted to rub down Hey, John Christine and your wife are out for the evening

Seemed a little tense earlier when we were talking out there. What if what if you didn't know the guy was gay You're still in a naked man massage. Well, what if you thought it was a straight guy? When you go, why are you naked for this? And he goes, well, I do it Reiki style. I have to get my bird on your back. What if he used his penis to massage your lower back? I mean, that's pretty gay, Bobby. OK.

What if he finished in you? Gay? What if you're a rabbi from Brooklyn that shouldn't be caught dead doing this? No, those Hasidic guys though, you saw them at the swingers thing, they go to the cellar, the naked massages, they're always out fucking around.

No. Motherfuckers. Well, because they can't. You know what I mean? They can't, they're not. Well, they can't because the women aren't allowed to leave the house. Well, they're not supposed to be gay. Yeah, they're not supposed to be getting naked massages. Yeah, they're not supposed to be gay. That's like the black guys in Atlanta. I mean the key is that women are allowed to leave the house

Yeah, they're not supposed to be gay that's like the black guys in Atlanta they're not supposed to be gay They're not supposed to be at swingers clubs with prostitutes either And hats that take over the overhead Everything and weird things and they hate all of us and they got a rock back and forth reading the book yeah free everybody all they have to do a terrifying prayer and put on some weird fucking thing on their head yeah they're gonna wrap their arm up in a fucking tourniquet hey do you mind if I put this old-timey camera on my head yeah He put the GoPro on their heads. What the fuck is that? What is that? I have to wrap myself like, sir, we're in airport Chilis. You're freaking people out. Why do they put, what is the thing

that they wrap around their arm and then their head and it looks like a GoPro? Man. I thought you guys should join Sniffys on your phone so we can get a real feel for how this thing works. Which one of us is gonna do it? I'm gonna get a real feel. Which one's gonna do it?

You are, we gotta, I don't, I can't do it. I can't do it because what if, what if Max uses my phone and then it's gonna do it? You're we're gonna I don't I can't do it. I can't do it because what? What if Max uses my phone one day and sniffies and that would make me so heartbroken I'm gonna die. I'll be like I knew it If Max is awesome in the way, I think he is he would start responding to things as you Well, I'm actually I'm actually gonna be in Beacon, New York So if you just want to come by Tell him you're a friend of mine go in the green room and just wait with your asshole

But also see if you could squeeze your legs together so I can see your dick and balls coming through your legs I'm doing a pump and dump at Louis CK Friday night in New York Is that Danny breath? No, I know that, but it seems like- I honestly didn't know what it was. A pump and dump is, and I just found this out last week, a pump and dump is when you, I say, as a gay man, I wanna get fucked by a lot of guys tonight.

I'm doing a pump and dump at my apartment. Here's the address, here's the time, and make a queue, and you guys show up on your time. So, you know, Jay, you would come at seven, you'd come at 7.30, you'd come at eight you would come at seven, you'd come at 7.30, you'd come at eight, Lou, DJ Lou, you'd come at 8.30, and Black Lou, you come last. You were gonna be late anyway.

It would have thrown the whole schedule off. A scheduled anonymous gangbang. It's okay, well I'll say that's the product, because I was, pump and dump is also just a basic term of like, you fucked somebody and, That's what they do. Never saw them again. No, but I didn't know that was like,

so you would say that if you brought a, if like a guy said he brought a chick home from a club one night, like dancing, he goes, yeah, I just got pump and dump, we fucked, that was it, it was over. No, the pump and dump for this is when, It's a gay gangbang. You schedule,

Train. Train. One guy wants to get fucked by a lot of dudes and they all just come one day. Gay train. And they just pump, dump, and leave. There's no exchange, there's no hey, you come, you fuck, you go. Guy just wants a lot of ding ding.

Okay. Yeah, wants a lot of, I think there was one the guy was talking about was 75 people. Why can't I see their, oh look, Cock-Cella presented by Sniffy's. Let's see who's performing Friday. It's come come Come come come come Well Saturday you think that's gonna be the big night

But it's actually a comes a headlining that one and then the support act actually is better that week where they got come come come come Come and then I my eyes are getting bad. I can't see the little ones there. I come, come, come, and then Sunday's the big dogs. Come. And then a bunch of comes after that and it's returning to the desert everybody. So much come. What's this slogan?

So much come. So much come. I should retweet that one. You should get that t-shirt. I really come, come, come, come, come. I'm so sad that Fist Fest got canceled this year. Aww. Yeah.

What a bum out. I was gonna send Danny and Joe Russell down. Oh, yeah. I wanted to do a comedy show at Fist Fest. Why not? That would be great. We should start promoting doing bonfire, stand-up comedy shows at strange events.

Yeah, we could do Cum Fest. Yeah. We could do Fist Fest. We should do a stand-up comedy shows at strange events. Yeah, we could do Cumpfest. Yeah. We could do Fistfest. Fistfest would be good. We should do stand-up comedy at a pump and dump. Oh, yeah. While you're waiting in line. That's right.

Or just a live broadcast from a pump and dump. We talked to the guy in between. He goes, now your next person coming. He goes, yeah, I was supposed to be here at 11, but it's 1110, so I don't know. It's got to be in traffic or something. But I'm ready. But I feel my b-hole starting to shrink back down

to normal size. Look at this. Oh, what? What? I can't look. What's your problem here? It's so hairy. Oh, God, that looks like a...

Does he have a bunch of beepers around his asshole? Do I have to vibrate the bit? Christine, zoom in on his asshole. Something's wrong with it. What kind of sneakers are those? I like those. It's not a good soon. Why is he wearing sneakers with his asshole? Those are V is Yeah, these come in from a jog No, god damn it. Oh, I guess we're never gonna see that gone fucking awesome asshole. Yeah Where'd it go? Oh, you got rid of it

It's not there Did you uh, did you see the? this weekend What's that? Oh the fucking dude they had car-sized drones Flying over New Jersey. Nice like the size of cars. Yeah flying over New Jersey My friend actually saw one over his who was They don't know They don't know. They don't know, I mean, we're not talking regular drones.

We're talking the size of cars flying over New Jersey all weekend long. Nobody knows who they were, what they were, what they were doing, and they've never seen drones this size flying over people's houses. The Joe Rogan Experience Companion here has some scientific news. Buddy, this was on the news.

The governor actually spoke out about it today. Yeah, they said they were seeing them from like 8 to 11 p.m. I didn't know they didn't know what they were. They have no idea who they were, what they were, but the size of them was freaking people out. Because it wasn't regular like DJI drones. These things were like the size of cars. Like they were huge.

And they weren't making any noise. Like your regular drone, they're pretty loud. These were just flying over people's houses. Some would just estimate them to be the size of small cars or SUVs, but that's also hysterical people. My friend saw one. You're hysterical. No, I'm telling you, my friend Joe. Yeah, W Joe you know big shoulders behind his back. You always call me go

Oh shit head Joe. Well, it's everything's the size of a car Personally is a big fan of the show listens every day. Yeah No, he saw holy shit. That's the size of a car Bobby. You don't eat that burger. That thing's the size of a car, man Buddy this is crazy and you this all goes back to when I saw the thing on the highway going home. Right. Well, you guys were like, that was a bird. And now.

You said it was a spaceship. Well, I mean, it could have been a fucking car drone. Of course. But the fact that there's, first of all, to fly a drone in New York, it has to be under a certain amount of weight for it to be legal, or you have to have a license to fly a drone. You can't just fly, like even the movie drones

that they use for the cameras, they're pretty big, but they're not the size of cars. You need to be licensed, you have to go through the, you have to get a certificate, all this shit. These people are flying car-sized drones over New Jersey at night over people's houses. Now, the problem with this is if the battery died, what are you laughing at? The music?

The music. Oh, sorry. I thought you were laughing at my... Bobby, while you're panicking about this drone invasion that's coming our way, we still have to do a comedy show. What the fuck are you laughing at over there? You think it's funny when the car drones come. Because I'm a little insecure bringing this up because I got made fun of last time I brought up

the thing I saw on the highway. Bobby, you said I saw a spaceship. I saw a UFO, not a spaceship. You didn't say it was a car-sized drone. I said UFO, which is an unidentified flying object. You thought there was a person with long green fingers inside that pushing buttons. And then he goes, he saw us. Yeah, well Well, who's gonna fly the thing, huh? Regular Joe

No, kids be regular old Joe fucking wacky ass Joe Video today of two girls thinking there was a UFO was clearly a plane with plane lights and a plane engine That is not true 100% as a hundred not percent no wait a second there's something on the side of that spaceship what you nighted oh my god they're uniting had plane lights on it's a United Force from another country it was coming to us okay they seem like they're humanoids through the windows hello let everyone else be the judge let's hear this it was a fucking drones over New Jersey this weekend.

It's all over the news. Oh, could somebody call in who saw our fucking drone, please? Is this the video you sent this morning? I sent over a couple videos over the weekend of the drones and the governor was talking about the drones this weekend. This weren't drones. This was just a plane. You don't know that? Yes, a plane. You don't know that? Yes I do.

You do not know that. You're always against me, Jacob. Bobby, those weren't drones, it was a plane. You're a cowboy till it's time to be a cowboy. A plane flew over them and they didn't know what it was. I'm telling you, Did you know what it was? What?

Fucking drones over Jersey. National, on the ground, fucking out, found out on the ground, like a million elephants, and still we're back. What? Fucking drones over Jersey. Don't pull your thang out unless you got your thang out. Drones over Jersey. Can you play the video you sent today? Hang on Jacob, this is happening first. What's that David where's the fucking chorus? Oh look at that look at that thing Look at those things go that's the size of a car

Christine play that shit. Damn, that's a long verse. Buddy, look at these, look at them. This joke ended five minutes ago. One, two. Oh, let's do a thang out. One, two, three. Drones over Jersey.

Four. Don't pull your thang out. Five. Unless you pull your thang out. Look at the size of these things. Drones over Jersey. Don't pull your thang out. Unless you the size of these things. Drones over Jersey. Don't pull your thang out unless you pull your thang out. Drones over Jersey. These things are huge. But we agree they're just drones. They're drones. Yeah but. That's a

plane. That's not a plane that was a drone. No this here is a plane. That was a drone. No this. No that's a drone Jay. Okay. That is that was a drone. No, this here is a plane. That was a drone. No, that's a drone, Jay. Okay. That is a fucking huge drone. No problem. They're flying all over Jersey, not even like high. They're flying like, you know, maybe a couple hundred feet off the ground

or off above the buildings. I guess cops looking for problems. How do they not know who the fuck they are? That's the problem is nobody knows who's flying car sized drones over fucking like people. That's the problem is nobody knows who's flying car-sized drones over, like, people. Because if the battery dies, that thing falls out of the sky, someone could die. You know what I mean?

Governor Murphy's all over it, don't worry. What is he saying? Don't pull your thing out unless you pull your thing out. Drones over Jersey. I sent you, I sent you. Pull your thing out. Drones over Jersey. Don't pull your thing out unless you pull your thing out drones over Jersey Don't pull your thing out and let you pull your thing out drones over Jersey

Because you dance moves I Sent you the thing with the governor on the in the in the chat He he came out look if the governor's know the it is, what's going on, that's crazy. Is our governor stupid? No, he's not stupid. Do we like him? I love him.

Why? He got us through COVID, he seems to be fair. Fucking woke loop. I don't have a lot of money, so taxes don't bother me. Did you write him a letter or something? Yeah. Irish. Whatever.

What, Bob, how do you just not, you don't have any- Twins should be tax-exempt. If you got a juicy ass, you should pay less for the train. You don't know shit about jerseys, shut up, Bob. I don't know shit about juicy asses, I know that. Yeah, you should be on butts and asses. See, we were looking at those asses on fucking smushies over there,

and blue was looking over his shoulder like this, he was going like, whatever, dude. Whatever. Whatever, dude, you think that's a thumper? Fuck that dude. I walk to the bus every day, you wanna see a thumper. Yeah dude, this show goes to pieces, Lou you don't have to worry about that dude, you start going prone bone on the fucking OnlyFans.

You go sniffies buddy, you're making a lot of money. Just let them, just open your butt cheeks enough so they can see your asshole in the scene that goes down your ball bag. No you're gay, get away from me. Well don't pull your thing out unless down to your ball bag. No, you're gay, get away from me. Well, don't pull your thing out unless you pull your thing out.

I mean, it's pretty, you're moving to Jersey. And imagine being out in your backyard and all of a sudden a car drone, size of a car, flies over here. I'm gonna do the acceptance of, when they accept, I'm just gonna ascend. I'm gonna accept complete, what do they call it, they take you away?

Fucking abduction. I'm gonna accept abduction, I'll put my arms out to the side. They can't abduct you, it's a drone. And I'll be like, Christine, stop trying to take my sneakers off and selling them before I get sold up in the plant. Well here's it, somebody actually pointed one of those laser things to one of the drones

and the drone took off. No it didn't. Yeah it did. In some kind of crazy drone took off. No it didn't. Yeah it did. In some kind of crazy direction or something? No it didn't. It's impossible, it's just a drone. It didn't, no it didn't do any crazy moves or anything like that but. We've been spotted.

I mean dude, to have more than one huge drone fly up is crazy. So you think they're scouting for something bigger like some cloverfield shit is coming? I don't know, dude. I mean, look, Amazon. No, you do know. You should have listened to what I said first.

I don't think it's probably, I don't believe you think it might be a Cloverfield monster. I don't think that's what you think. You don't know. Okay, in fairness, I don't know. You don't know. We could have been just using those to awaken a Cloverfield monster that's been living under the sea.

I'm just saying. And then this goddamn company stirs shit up. Corporations, dude. Look, a year ago you thought it was crazy to see something over the Hudson. Now there's drones everywhere over Jersey. Bobby, I didn't think it was crazy that you saw something over the Hudson.

I'm saying for you to think that it was a spaceship, you are now saying, like you came in with rational explanations right away, like it's probably a drone or something, but it was pretty wacky seeing it over there You were like no, they were commute. They heard me talking. They are trying to communicate with me You know the same you're the people you're the people You're the people that don't believe in things

You have no belief. Yes. Okay, and when the stuff happens, right when things go down You're gonna be the one stuck in the city with nowhere to go. I'm gonna be the one prepared, ready to go, because I saw this shit coming. Did you see how, what a boner Rogan was getting when like Trump, if Trump was aware of little green men sitting in a tube somewhere that we found years ago or something,

the way he said it, he goes, I'm gonna disclose the alien stuff, you know, it's time, it's time. And he's like, you're gonna say it? The thing goes, yeah, I'm gonna disclose it. It's like, do you think he's gonna be telling us, guys, guess what, there's whole other species on other planets we've been communicating with for years.

I didn't tell you for the last eight years, but I'm gonna bring it up, it's, come on. You're waiting for nothing. The alien thing, I think they definitely have ships. Yeah, drones. No, they probably have some type. Size of cars. I'm telling you, they probably have

some type of ship somewhere. Remember the guy who Rogan had on, I forget his name. Liar McAllister. So you're telling me right now. Liar McPiss did his old job. You're telling me. It's always what it is. The CIA fired me. So I'm telling you, there's aliens. Everybody in this room right now. Out of all the, you guys don't believe in aliens. You don't believe that we,

the government has a ship or something had landed and we have it. Do you believe that? I believe, I completely believe in aliens. Thank you. But I do believe that was like an Amazon test for future deliveries. It might be because Amazon is testing out, but they would have to let people know,

you'd have to let the FAA know, you'd have to let the airports know, you can't just fly planes, I mean there's small planes over Teterboro that you need to let other people know, okay we're gonna test these drones out so don't have planes in this area. He believes in aliens. He believes the world's flat He believes you could fuck a baby and cure AIDS That's what that's why that's what happens in Africa. It's crazy. What's that?

But you're going to two topics does the drones and and the UFOs? You're not saying they're UFO drones No, I'm not saying the UFO drones I'm saying that he brought up the fact that I brought up there might be a UFO that I saw last year And he's saying it's crazy. There's no UFOs and Trump said he was gonna reveal all the UFO stuff when he gets in the office And Rogan was all whipped up about it. There has to be something we can't go from Thousands of years of the same technology and then the last 80 years we have fucking computers and Phones in all this crazy cars that drive themselves that quickly

It's not like we figured it out that fast. Something had to- 124 years. What? We even, what, electric cars? Actually, yeah. I know, they had an electric car back in the day. I'm just saying the technology we have.

Technology in general, yeah. The AI on my phone that I can go into my phone now. Calculators. Type in. Modern encyclopedia. But we had books for years. And now all of a sudden we have computers. They kind of said though that is always how it works.

So it goes like, it's like a heavy spurt of things and then it kind of triples off for a while. Who's they? The people. You fucking asshole. This is why we suck as humans. You don't even know what you're talking. You just said that.

You've never heard that. I find my iPhone's alien technology. Bobby, I like what you think is like you're willing to accept that it's drones, but you think the person holding the remote control has big long alien fingers. That's not what I'm saying. Like when you find this, who's controlling this drone? It's like somebody with fly eyes and a giant gray head.

That is not what I'm saying. Oops, I got this at Brookstone. That is not what I'm saying. I've got this and the Gronk neck massager. What if that is it though? Bleep blork, bleep blonk blork. What if it was aliens controlling the joke? That's their toys?

With giant, three giant fingers, the war of the world's hand comes over and it's just playing with a joystick. Those are just little kid aliens and it's their Christmases before our Christmas. Let's go over the beach and look at Hooters an official aircraft approached an onset one night the lights on the drones went dark and This is the governor talking. I just have a cute. What is it? Okay. Let's hear what the governor has to say

Nine additional sightings were reported including 20 and Huntington County. I was on with the White House and Homeland Security leadership literally at the very top. Is this gonna be my governor? That's your governor. Oh my god, dude. Why not? Did they wake him up after time went on last night? Yeah, why is he wearing my aunt's glasses? He showed up from last night's party. He really just got those at CVS on the way to this fucking press conference. He's like tomorrow morning. I'm gonna get on that. They go, it is morning. He goes, whew, look at that. It is.

That's why Lou Legsom. He's all beat up from working so hard. Is that what it is? That's the way Lou would dress if he was the governor. Now if you need me, I have to go judge this shitty pumpkin coloring contest at this stupid school. All right, go ahead. Pretty much all day.

I'm hoping we'll get answers sooner than later. The Morris County mayors are asking for a full investigation to determine their origin, purpose, if they are in compliance with... Go back a little bit, Christine, actually. Go back to the governor. Just get back to him. Right there. Don't have to play it, but I will just say, Christine, do me a favor. go through those books that are in that school's library right there. When we get to Jersey, I want to make a real stink about that they still allow these books for some reason. Let's find problems with these books. The night war. I keep seeing that.

That's funny. Let's find out, and that goes, ah, there's misgendering in this book. And then, Christine, let's really become like town problems. With no kids. I wanna have book burnings. I wanna be very involved with how the schools are run with no children You have to have your big dog on like a little pouch in front like you carry it

Yes, like a baby full-size dog there so you have 58 pounds of dogs hanging from my chest And I'll go I go she's sweet She's being weird because she knows you're uncomfortable She's being weird because she knows you're uncomfortable. Now this is Christine everybody. She's about to dominate your school systems libraries with heavy censorship. I'm going to lead the PTA. She comes in dressed like a witch. Too many white kids in this class.

All right, go ahead. I think I was pretty much all day. I hope we will get answers sooner than later. Go ahead. I mean, this is... I think that was pretty much all day. I'm hoping we'll get answers sooner than later. The Morris County mayors are asking for a legal investigation. That guy doesn't look all right. Listen to this.

To determine their origin, purpose, if they are in compliance with regulations. Any scandals ever? No. No. Christine? Look up. Governor of, what's his name?

Murphy. Governor of Jersey. Governor Murphy scandal. No way. You want there to be no way, but it's true. I don't care I'm not moving to know you I'm best Chester black Lou so I think you should move, but you moved to your wish You're in fucking Canada Came to your house. There's a different climate out there It's West Chester my ears My ears popped. Your ears popped. You're jumping out of the city. I had to put the emergency brake on

every time I was at a stop sign because everything was 95 degrees straight up. If Max goes outside of your house and jumps on a sled, he's gonna land on the West Side Highway. He won't stop to the West Side Highway. It's straight down until there. Are you guys gonna come back up? Yeah.

Okay, good. It's not that far. It's your home. Yeah, but it's not that far. No, I know, but I'm saying, but it is a funny thing to be like, you ever gonna come back up? Yeah. Okay, good. It's not that far. It's your home. Yeah, but it's not that far. No, I know, but I'm saying, but it is a funny thing to be like, you ever gonna come up again? Yeah, it wasn't. Yeah, you do it every day.

Ah, here we go. New Jersey Governor Phil Murphy accused of using $12,000 in taxpayer money for food and drinks at MetLife Stadium and expensive pens. This piece of shit. What a piece of garbage. That's only $2,000 more than Amy gave to Val. What a piece of shit. What a piece of garbage. That's only $2,000 more than Amy gave to Val. What a POS.

Wow. That's nothing. What? Nothing? That's not nothing at all. This is his second term. You probably won't have to see him. Oh, thank god.

Oh, is he out early in the year? I think that's how it works. Is he a Democrat? I think he can only go two terms, right? Yeah, two terms. Only two terms Well, Bloomberg made it three terms. He changed the rules while he was here. He was the mayor He was he was the mayor. Yeah, he changed He's the only one that changed he was supposed to be two terms for everybody, but he changed it when he was the mayor

But I don't think he can change it. So governors too. I Governor's gonna be the new governor. We did drive through the area we're going to be though, and I will say, it is, there was signs for both parties, but just living in a place where people put their political signs on the lawn at all is definitely like, yeesh. Yeah, I know. Yeah, we have a person around the house, I love America, I just hate Trump. It's like, all right, relax.

We went to a Mexican restaurant in the area. Yeah. That was what we did on my birthday. And there was in there, I said, oh boy. I go, these are, it was white people with money. It seemed, not like they were dressed in their money at all, but like it was this confidence there was at this Mexican restaurant, they have like a side room. And I guess there was like a wedding dressed in their money at all, but it was this confidence there was, at this Mexican restaurant, they have a side room,

and I guess there was a wedding happening in there. Or something, a real Mexican wedding happening in this room. A lot of color. Yes, and what they had going on outside, one of the things, I don't know why, what this means, or maybe it was for the kids, but they had a guy in a suit that looked like almost the football robot, the NFL and Fox robot. or what maybe was for the kids, but they had a guy in a suit that looked like almost the

The football robot the NFL on Fox robot. I mean it was this huge this guy was like eight feet tall at least any and it's the whole thing like lit up or something and then these nosy just 50 something 60 something year old white people came up and they go, oh God, what is this about? What's the meaning of the, not shitty, like the drunken, like, well, we're just gonna dominate this situation, and then they're like, oh, just go, come on, without asking anything,

he's like, take pictures of us with this thing, and the old man, and then he goes, nah, bad picture, come on, guy, we're going home for one more. I just like, oh, I hate it, I was like, I hated those people. Welcome to Jersey. Just the, it's not welcome to Jersey. That was Jersey. That's exactly what everybody in New Jersey's like.

That's Jersey, dude. Yeah, a lot of mooks. To do that. That's Jersey. I love it. That's why they're the best in the country. Yeah, dude. Yeah.

I don't know if it's Jersey. That's the situation of Jersey. But that was just those people. Those people were very, I was like, ooh, I would not like these people. To be fair, Long Island, too. Yeah, if it's Jersey. It's the situation of Jersey. But that was just those people. Those people were very I was like, well, I would not like these people. To be fair, Long Island too. Yeah, Long Island, Jersey. Yeah, dude, your Jersey.

Well, I think it's any old people with money. The super confidence. That's just fucking Jersey, dude. Fucking cameo over here. I'm trying to find it. Let's take a picture with this. Yeah, that is sort of basically what it was. Yeah.

And then the guy, I kept looking in the room. And at one point, the guy was in this suit in the center of a circle. And I thought everybody had pool noodles, but they had like long balloons. And they were just dancing around him in a circle. It was very bizarre. I kept looking.

And Christine was staring in the window in the glass doors of this wedding like a fuck, like it was a Mexican zoo. I was like, stop doing that the glass doors of this wedding like a fuck. He was a Mexican zoo I was like stop doing you're being these you're being these people. What's this? What's the outfit? Oh take pictures with us Like two girls in white dresses that they were like I thought was I didn't know if it's quinceanera or a wedding It was a wedding But there were two young girls in white dresses with tiaras that they were like presenting I don't know if it was a debutante thing or maybe there are two weddings

With the with the brides, maybe the Mexican people don't make their brides means wear shitty colored dresses like Fuck our fucking people do Jersey. There you go. You're in What part of Jersey are they from you know the Bon Jovi's What part of Jersey are they from? You know, the Bon Jovi's. Sayreville, down the shore, halfway. Down the shore. You know in Jersey, it's illegal to pump your own gas. I do know that.

You don't pump, which I love. We know I lived in Jersey for many years. I didn't know that when. South Jersey, that's where we moved that photo. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's Jersey. I love, I love, but South Jersey is Philly. It's just the outside of Philly,

and then this is New York. Yeah, that's more Philly. Jersey's a different animal. No, Jersey, North Jersey is much more New York and South Jersey is Philly. It's more like Long Island. Long Island and Jersey are very similar. Suburbs. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Westchester, different. It's not though. It's different. You're like Connecticut, it's very waspy and stuffy and fucking stuck up. Yeah. This is more like ethnic, like the Italians. Yeah. Mine is rich people.

Ryan Reynolds. Yeah. Rich whites. Martha. A lot of earth tones. All the Connecticut whites. Yeah. I like the little earth tones.

Greens. Forest green. I need a quilted jacket. Yeah, I have one. Me and Dawn. Oh, Dawn. Totally assimilated. She had a long... She had a she had a long

Had a quilted long vest She came out the other day. I'm like what are you? Fuck are you wearing she had a quilted long vest and her hair was done like a lion's mane. That's very Martha Stewart She's trying to fucking sell her plate somewhere She's all in up in Westchester,. We are. She's all tan, all tan clothes. Gotta take a break. Yeah Dawn's going full Woods. She's going full Connecticut Waspie. Oh nice. Oh yeah dude. She might end up being with Christine. I hope so. Bobby Kelly. That'd be my dream if they wind up, not lesbian out but just live together. Well if you want to

give Dawn room to breathe so she can explore all of her curiosities. You can go catch Bobby. Hetheregs. That's tomorrow. It's tomorrow night, we have tickets still available. Ooh, and some special guests, maybe? We have four special guests. Ah! Tomorrow night.

Four special guests. What, special Santas. Woo! So if you're a fan of this show, come down. That's a weird cell yep after that is gonna be in Beacon New York Kansas City special guest there too in Beacon Beacon special guest nice yeah very special guest real in fact better than me no shit if you really Chappelle's gonna be said yes you like to see really

good comedy Matt right no Matt coming out, doing about 30 minutes in front of Bobby. Oh, I wish that blonde-haired vixen would come up. That's sexy. I'd love to see him on stuffies. I'd love to sit on his lap and just do my whole act. Oh, give him a little stuffy. I'd let him do his act.

Where you from? Every Tuesday night, you can catch Bobby at the Fat Black Pussycat Lounge at the Comedy Seller. For tickets and all of his tour dates, go to PunchUp.live slash Robert Kelly. Make sure you check out his YouTube page, youtube.com slash at Robert Kelly Comedy. Yeah, go sign up for that. Subscribe to it.

I need to get subscribers over there before we put the special out, which is coming out next week, Killbox. If you haven't seen it, it's going to be up there and all my standups going out. All stand up all the time. Subscribe to my YouTube while you're at it Too we're really special soon. So Please you go these two new specials are coming out. We're releasing two new specials. Can't wait to see him Go see big Jay this weekend st. Louis at st. Louis helium and Christine is gonna scroll any minute now

It's okay. Don't worry about it St. Louis the 12th in the through the 14th and then he's gonna be at West Palm Beach, Providence, Boston Wilbur Theater. Make sure you bring him a cheesesteak from somewhere around there to let him know what a cheesesteak really is for tickets and all of the tour dates. I'll take it.

BigJComedy.com and PunchUp.live slash BigJOkerson for all those other stuff. And is our show sold out? Are we all sold out, VU? I just need to hear back from Liz, but it might be sold out. We're all sold out? Are we all sold out? We're very close to selling. Try to get tickets. ComedySeller.com. It's next week. We have a special, I'm going to have a lot of special guests coming. Next Tuesday night we have a very very special show. Bonfire live Christmas show.

Watch out for the aliens. Don't putch thang out unless you putch thang out. We'll be right back. It's the bonfire. Drone to Berger. See you.