The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Reality Updates (w/ Joe DeRosa & Shannon Lee)

Episode Date: March 2, 2020

Jay sits down with cast of The Jersey Shore and they discuss Mike's time in prison. Joe DeRosa joins the show and him and Jay transform into no-nonsense principals. Shannon Lee gives an update on her prison love romance as the gang discusses "Love After Lockup."

You're listening to Comedy Central! BAM! Hi, I'm Dan Soder. I'm Big J.O.K.R.S.M. And you're listening to the Best of the Bond Fire. Stay tuned to hear some of our favorite moments from this week. You can listen to the Bond Fire live every Monday through Thursday from 6th to 8 p.m. on Comedy Central Radio. Serious XM95 or on demand on the Serious XM app.

Also, be sure to follow us on all social media at the Bond Fire, SXM. Camper's hey, it's Black Lou and welcome to bonfire's best of the week we're kicking things off with a special interview big j did with the cast of jersey sure everyone's the bonfire comedy central radio series xm 95 i'm big jokerson dan's off filming billions today but i had to come in myself when i heard i had an opportunities once again interview the cast of the Jersey Shore family vacation season three

continuation, getting ready to start this Thursday in studio. We have an amazing lineup of the cast here. We of course have Mike the situation. Jenny J. Wow, Dina Nicole's snooki. I mean, it's so cool. You don't have to say last names. Your friend or your coworker films billions? Yeah, well, no, he's on the show, yeah.

Yeah, my friend Kelly's on the show. Oh, really? Yeah. He plays Muffy. Shit. Yeah. No. You don't watch it for your friend either?

No, I don't. I've seen it, I've seen it, but I'm not familiar enough to know the different characters. It's too heady for me. I watch it because Dan's on it. I support my pride. They're talking to people much smarter than me on that show. In fact, I did one scene in the first season and the episode I was playing a drug dealer

from Montreal. Oh, fine. The scene. Yeah, probably the scene. Yeah, they said it was a role I was meant to play. But the scene before I shot, I watched them shoot at 18 times. They had to keep going. And it's explaining what the show is about and what they do.

And I still have no idea. It was explaining it for the dummies. And I still had no idea. It's so great to have you guys here. I know Morning Press blows when you guys gotta run around and do this, so I hope this will be fun for you. I like coming serious.

It's my favorite place to come. So it's so chill. Yeah, I had the ball because you can curse on everything. Yeah, I love cursing. That helps a lot. You can curse on everything. Mike, I had the pleasure of interviewing you. You did my podcast, that's the R of interviewing you. You did my podcast.

Yes. The R show. V. Yes. Before you went away. Yeah. Goodness. And you're out. Now, thank God. Yes. It was amazing how emotionally attached. I got also. I got DJ Lou Verri into the show. It's amazing how emotionally attached. I got to you going away. Yeah. And sad also. In fact, when they had the false report, they thought you were going for two years. Did you freak out? Yes. It was like the worst thing.

I was definitely a sad episode. The music and stuff. Did you cry when you saw a reaction? I think I saw it in prison and I did tear up. Yeah, I don't tear up during like serious events, but it's not watching it. I have no idea. Still eat that information. I've been watching it for two years. I mean, I'll tell you what though, everyone's thinking that though,

when you got this eight months. I get eight months, yeah, it wasn't fun. I know, but when it ended up being eight months, everyone was like, two years. We're going to thank God. I really, I really, production was like pissed because we've got the 22 months.

So, 24 months. We were like, like that got our big reaction. And then when we. 24 months. We were like, oh, like, that got our big reaction. And then when we heard eight months, we were like, not as emotional, because we're like, okay, God, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, what's the point of it? We were like, oh, eight months. You can do that on his head. Like, yes!

And I'm like, oh, my God, I'm still in the right direction. Still here, she's going to be the great one, guys, yeah. February? Yes, federal is a federal camp, yeah. We're serious to it. Eight months, it was not a comfortable situation, not good food, you're away from your loved ones. You got to share a bathroom with like 100 savages.

Oh, yeah. You know, I'm the best. That's like a girl's nightclub bathroom, okay? You have a girl's bathroom and a nightclub. Oh my God. Disgusting. You'll get like something to lead to that situation. So like, you know, you think you're in federal prison and like, you know, especially a camp

and, you know, you're okay. And one day they're doing searches and they find in shanks and shit. Oh, man. So I'm like, you know, you're like, oh my god, I'm in prison. I better like tighten the fuck up. You know what I'm saying? Like, because anything can happen. Did you make any sort of friends?

Oh, yeah. Definitely. As soon as I walked in, like, I had like, you know, the Jewish communities were handing me like bags of goods. I was really excited. Like a welcome, like, welcome, not welcome home, but welcome. And the Italian communities gave me a bag

and the Russian communities were like, you can sit with us, you're going to be sitting here for, you know, chow. So I think there- The federal prison has a lot of different ethnicities than I thought you were gonna say. Yes, Spanish, Spanish, you like that's a Polish-Garden ball of the Ukrainians.

Oh, you did it. It's crazy, listen, there was just like, it was like clicks that just sort of like, you know, ran that particular facility. And that's just what it is, yeah. Did you have to get any weird tattoos to sit in the ward fuck with you? No, I was lucky that a lot of the old heads liked me.

I was able to get extra food. I was able to watch Jersey Shore on Thursday night, which was my wedding season at that time period. And they just liked to be a wedding by the way. They were just being ready by the way. Yeah, right, it was really cool. And the best wedding ever. Yes, I had to watch my wedding in prison, yeah.

Jesus, it was a pleasant prison. I did choke up a little bit, but it also was such a beautiful wedding, you know, Nicole and J.W.Y.S. daughters walked down the aisle and was really cool for me. So I had a lot to like, sort of like look, not look forward to, but be like grateful for. I would also give you some. I was grateful to have such a beautiful wedding so I could like, sort of like draw from that experience.

Like, okay, I have a, you know, good life and good friends and good family and really be focused on what's really important in life. Well, you can, and you were able to ride some of those memories, probably through it. Yes. I guess. That's what helps me get through the eight months. It's my number one fear, I'd say, going to jail because I feel like I would just count the days constantly.

Yeah, you would feel it in entire 24 hours, worth of day. Yeah, I feel like. Yeah, you got to do some soul searching when that happens. Are you gonna man up when the time comes? If, if, yeah, that's what I'm saying. I'd be taking constantly, I go, well, they're gonna see, I'm a big guy,

but I've got jolly all over my face. I mean, if I walk into a prison, I'm like, I know, and I'm the person who walks in and I'd be like, I wouldn't understand. Like, guys, why don't we just start like a football league or something, and I'll have fun together. Yeah, I'll have fun with that. The whole prison, and I go, well, this guy's we just start like a football league or something? And I'll have fun together. That's a fun thing. The whole prison, they're like,

well, this guy's gonna be blowing everybody by the night. The whole prison got so excited when these guys came to visit me. They were like, you know, there was like guys in the corner like taking not best, but like, oh my God, I love dinner. I know I love Snookie, she's mine. And then, oh my God, Jay-Wall and those glasses,

it was just like crazy when these girls came visit me. She just sold cell phone pictures and everybody. They have the prison photographer there to take photos, during visits, and you dine on the finest of vending machine refreshments. Mm-hmm. Do they have, I've seen the prison, they have a backdrop for you to take pictures in front of.

So, you're not in jail, It's like a yacht behind you. You're still wearing like prison blues. They did, but I got lucky. My prison was one of the nicer ones, I think, in the country. So it was an okay designation if you have to go. You know? You did a classic move going away to prison. You came out yoked, dude.

Yeah. You're the last thing the last season, the whole thing was about you being chubby Yeah, yeah, I lose 40 pounds. Oh, yeah, do you look fantastic? Thank you. Thank you so much We're gonna say little were you impressed look at black. Are you getting a nod from a black guy? Yeah, we put we put the work in plus these guys came to visit me all the time So I was really excited to to I don't know turn a negative situation positive and were probably like, I wonder if he's gonna come out fat or I wonder if he's gonna eat like everything, you know. I feel like we, I knew you were gonna come out

like you were dedicated to the best version of yourself. I was, oh, I'd love these guys. And you before you went in, I mean, you had such a, I don't know if emotional is right word, like almost like a personality turn around within the years that it's been like amazing I mean J well Punched you in the face. First of all that that situation

No pun intended showed me What a dude you were like a real dude because a lot of guys would have thrown some kind of a hit back for how hard you hit him in the face And he just went he he just went, whoa. I say this all the time. It's the hardest punch I've ever taken as a man in life so far. Oh my God.

And I've done sports, I've done boxing, I've done football, I'm into sports my whole life. Try that. She did a back fist that almost probably unhinged my jaw. I didn't even mean that. So you meant it. No, I didn't mean to. Like I didn't think it would actually hit on jaw. I didn't even mean that. You meant it. No, I didn't mean to.

Like, I didn't think it would actually hit on me. That was like a John Jones. He was even really looking. It was like a spinner and it was the perfect distance. Yeah. And on that moment, I realized I fucked up. No. It was such a smack, yeah.

Everyone here except for you has kids right now. Is that what you're getting at work on now? We're working on it all the time. It's actually fun working on it. I here except for you has kids right now, is that we're gonna have a work on now? Yeah, we're working on it all the time. It's actually fun working on it. I was gonna say, I'm trying to do that. I always talk to these guys, you know, my sisters, and be like, oh, I'm thinking about doing this. And they're like, no, no, no, no, don't do that.

I've got a last idea. I was like, no. Yeah, I was like, I'm thinking about really talking dirty in the bed with the misses. It was like something you say to your biggest enemy and you're like, no, I don't say that to your wife. No, don't say that to the misses.

What was your dirty talk ideas? What? What was your dirty talk ideas? Tell them where you wanted to call it. Okay, okay, okay. Okay, that's what I'm saying. They told me and it's acceptable to tell your wife, you know, you're my little slut.

Yes. Where in fact, my little, my little, it was a little off-brand. I don't know, I don my little slut. Yes. Wearing facts. My little, my little, it was a little off-brand. I don't think it. I didn't like it. No, no, no. Well, that's how it was. That would actually be his number one punch in the face.

I feel like after that, we mentioned so. Yeah, and I told the wife that I was talking about this, and she said that the girls were pretty much right. Yes, thank you. Yeah, so you gave her the heads up, okay? Would you? Yeah. It's a rhythm to throw somebody goes, hey, later on. I call you a, thank you. Is, yes. You gave her the heads up like, hey, would you? That's a weird thing to throw to somebody. I was like, hey, later on.

I call you a f***er. I was like, no, it's just. I feel bad. Yeah, that's a good thing. I'm gonna go bad. I'm just gonna ask me what conversations I got into. And look, well, you know, I was trying to experiment in the bedroom and I asked the girls, like, you know,

what's okay? Why not, okay. And she said, what do you mean? And he told her and she kind of, we're very, yeah. We, but this is us every single day. We're very open with each other. We love that.

We have no boundaries. And many of you girls ever stopped having sex because the guy just said something so ridiculous that it was like, that's it. That's it. That's it. Completely. Yeah, I don't think I've been to the mind.

Talk to me like that. I also think it's weird to be a guy. I have. I'm sure there was something along the way somewhere. I think it's weird also this would be a heavy guy talker in bed Well, I don't think I've ever experienced like a talker. What if you're in a marriage? Okay, and you're trying to spice things up spice that situation up You got to think outside the box literally, you know literal and physically

You have to spice up yet, dude. You were away as soon as you got married Yes, yes, no, I didn't have the spice anything up when I got home, but now I've been home for three to four months. I'm trying to put a bun in the oven. So I'm just trying to sort of think outside or inside the box, I guess, to make things happen. Oh, damn, this is going by so fast. I have one question I really wanted to ask you guys.

That's, it's not even all that personal. It's really advice for myself. I know I think Jenny and Nicole both have had your teeth fixed through the years. I'm thinking about doing it. Dean also, I know Ronnie and you don't have your teeth. No, no, I got scared of Ronnie's. I was going to say Ronnie. I was going to say Ronnie got and Vinnie, I think too, right? I'm pulling. I'm pulling. Yeah, we were having to we were having I'm thinking about doing it. That's why yeah Like I had to get something cuz I would wait in my teeth every time I would go out

I would use a crest white strip and it like it's really Sent it my yeah, yeah, I can't use the crest white strips But I was thinking about going in May is when I have it set to do ultimately to get the front four six Yeah, I love yeah. I love it. I'm on camera a lot. I take pictures, tons with people after comedy shows and I hate the way I smile because I'm trying to tie my teeth. And everyone goes, your teeth are fine.

I'm like, I'm sure they're fine. I know nobody really cares. But it bothers you. If it bothers you, then yeah. I feel so much more confident. Yeah. I'm looking at my girlfriend with this stain now. Yeah, no, you could get me investigate.

Yeah, I know what it's like to have like that like insecure feeling for whatever have. I know before I got my teeth done. Yeah, my concern though is then what's the next thing? That's gotta be the skit. You know, I mean like the teeth get fixed and then yeah, yeah, I should. Well, at least a lift. No, yeah.

42, you know, it's almost getting time to I had braces and everything my teeth look exactly the same It's just that the enamel is I would cry like try to wait in my teeth. Are they veneers? Yeah I went to be so it's right. They go on top of my head. They do They don't just shave them down, but I shaved them down and I look I called them down, but I shaved them down and I look, I called their fuckin' look like a damn shark. Yeah. I wish you took a picture.

They take a little Dracula to you. Yeah, they're terrifying. And they say you can't. You can fuck it, see what a millimeter looks like. Oh, I wish you took a picture. And if you go like, if that happens while you're out and about, you have like a weird little, if one falls out or something while you're out. I've never

But what they don't tell you is that there's a temporary that you have to get in yes for two weeks I'm actually happy that you said four to six because if you get a whole Top or bottom temporary it's one of those uncomfortable like painful things. You'll have a experience. You did the whole thing Yeah, I did all like like, but that was probably the worst part. And sometimes you can get a list of any got a list. Yeah. But now he's okay. Yeah, he did have a list at one point. He started talking a little weird. I thought it's because his huge weener was dragging down his toe. Oh my god. Did you guys actually see his dick in Vegas? No, I was like, you made me some things like you're going. I was a huge helicopter. His dick. No, I didn't. I was saying it was helicopter is dick.

Nah, I didn't see it. I was talking about the helicopter too. Sick. I don't even know what to talk about. I just assume it's what he did. If you let Vinny go on about his stripping career, he will go on for a long time. Jesus show him and that's what he's doing.

He takes pride in stripping on stage for him. I'm just impressed you can helicopter your dick at all. If I did the motion, I would helicopter a dick. It would look like that thing. Do you remember the thing behind the door? When were you flicked it? That's what my helicopter would look like. Yeah, you know, so I got to get my teeth fixed. And speaking of that, I think you should do anything in your life to sort of get progress. You know, we're all a work and progress and a masterpiece at the same time. Don't not think, don't meddle in it. I'm talking about you, you're teeth and work on exercising and eating healthy.

And I think that's the biggest jug of all is growth. You're right. And Nicole, to answer your thing, to answer your thing, there are some dick things you could do, but I don't think it's, I think the science isn't in. Yeah, no, it's not. You can get surgery and shit. You can get surgeries. You can get surgery and shit. I should make a lose it. You can get surgery. You can get surgery.

I don't have a debt. You can go to like Brazil and get like extensions and stuff. A Brazil? I mean, it is a Brazil for a lot of things. A lot of things. Yeah. But everything they've heard, they go. Extenders and stuff.

Just, I've heard words like, well, they just got a snipper. And I'm like, nah, I'm already out. Yeah, I wouldn't have. I wouldn't mess with that particular region. No, no, never. The teeth will make you feel more comfortable and confident. You can do it. Maybe it'll make your hollow confidence more confident.

Yes. And my asshole bleaching. It'll be a hope, it'll be a 12 step process. I'll be a new person. These breast implants. Yeah. Or put it put me under. I'm going to go, snook he said to do this

Jersey show or season three continuation Family vacation of course season three continuation airing this Thursday. I'm so excited already DVR I've even seen all the fall I I follow all the in between like the best of shows because when a DVR on my thing It just I guess and I guess I'm telling you, I've been with you guys since early days, we had Ronnie in here with you guys last time. He came in late, but he came in and I've been afraid. I mean, I've loved him. I go back to one shot, was my favorite thing. I love the idea of you guys,

because you guys obviously at a time, probably not even so much now, because everyone's kind of grown up with you guys, and you guys are adults now, and with your own families and stuff that You guys even the people that kind of probably wanted to hate you in the beginning. You just become lovable Oh, thank I'd like to see you guys flourish and my congratulations on finishing your time Dude, I know you still speaking and stuff. You said you were doing sobriety speaking stuff a bunch. Yeah Sober kill in the game. So you know, I speak around the country, different colleges and treatment centers,

specifically banning treatment centers, shout out, you know, where I'm just spreading positivity and hope and helping people get on the right track in life. Sometimes I never come back. Well, let me say as someone who has been following you guys forever and you don't know me, but I know you guys now, Sam, I'm proud of where all you got. You guys have all become such cool people. and this is my second time meeting some of you

or actually all of you except for Dean in the first time here and we hope to have you on again thank you so much thank you Jersey Shore family reunion season three continuation this Thursday night have a great rest of your day guys thank you bonfire thank you thanks guys hey cameras is black Lou again and here's a bonus clip for you all of Jay and Joe Derosa doing their black no nonsense principal impressions Enjoy am I gonna watch you boys die on these streets?

You've been using those guns now use your mind Not to me, you got think about that baby now. Okay, you ain't thinking just for yourself. You gotta think about that baby. You's called the crazy Joe, and I call the Batman. Up until yesterday, your title was stewed and... Day on? It's Mama. Yeah, I think I, you, a mama.

You gotta take care of that kid. Don't do what your mom did to you. You need to stop hitting your friends and start hitting those bucks. Wake up. You think the man wanna see you succeed? You think that's what's going on? This world got everything against you. You got a rise above it.

And we're in a brown suit and shit. It'd be so great. Yeah. Now you afraid to tell your dad it? That you got pregnant. I'm gonna come over with you. Now I know it's generally inappropriate, but get in my car.

Now I'm gonna drive you home. I don't care if people see. Get in the damn car. People gonna talk, they gonna talk. Hey there, I'm DJ Liu and on this week's Lost Taps, the very lovely Shannon Lee from Gas Digital, shares her expertise on Love After Lockup. Then she also shares an update of her prison love life. We have Shannon today. We're also locked in to love after lockup. And we had, was it for couples or three? Are you saying that we're locked in?

Without bail? I know, Jacob, I know. I don't know where that comes from. Last couple we did on love after lockup was... We did Josh and, Josh and Josh and Cheryl. Josh and Cheryl, cute Colorado couple. Yeah, well, she's from Shannon Filmmino in this Michigan. Oh, done.

I wrote this all down because I knew I was gonna forget when you asked me so I made a spreadsheet. Cheryl's coming from somewhere else. Cheryl's coming from somewhere else. I'll tell you one thing I do know that you don't have to look up. She has too many teeth in her face Cheryl's got a lot of teeth. Oh, yeah, not enough meat on the bone. She is extraordinarily thin The guy reminds me disturbingly of Nate a big Nate and the way he talks

They are big done Nate pargats. They talk the same like their mouth moves the same way when they talk Do you know that Harrington is obsessed with Cheryl? I do know that. Like, you know, like, you love her. Why? You know why? I'll tell you exactly why. I'll tell you why, because she's pretty enough that you can lure her easily with meth into a lifetime of love with you.

I don't know about you. You need a lot of meth to get her to go to a lifetime contract, but you can definitely give her a franchise tag for like a couple grams of ice. Yeah, yeah, for sure. You get her back into the meth game, which by the way, she's itching to get back into it. Oh my god.

Right now this guy is her meth. You show her crushed glass in a fucking motel parking lot. She's gonna put it on her tongue. Pack of merits. And let her rip. Her job is an intervention specialist. Oh, right. She's clean now.

Yeah, she's like the incredible Hulk. She's the incredible Hulk, they're like, how do you stay sober? She's like, cause I always want to get fucked fucked up But I always feel like if you dive in That deep into the world of sobriety when you get sober. It's because you're on the White knuckle in it. You're the one one bad night away from diving back in hard I think you're a bad fucking baseball score if she's like a good ranger's fan and they lose and she's like well That's it. I'm smoking meth again. But I'm telling you, she's this guy is her met.

She wouldn't get involved in a situation this fucking retarded. If she wasn't, uh, like this, this is what she supplements doing drugs with. He's her drug. Yes. She needs this crazy. That's wrong. Fighting with them. Hom it is romantic.

All you find yourself digging through a swamp for $20. All we got to watch that we didn't need you to get to watch that all These people are like bad Rihanna videos. Yeah, like at best case scenario It's Rihanna singing about a sexy guy worst case scenario. You're on love after lock up in a swamp Looking for a fucking a K Just one K So as as you probably know the way that she came to find out who he was where she was doing a report on serial killers. I didn't know this. Yeah. So uh, she then she has an obsession with like people in prison and dangerous

guys. And that's how she met Josh. That adds up because the mom does keep saying I was unaware of. Yes. She was looking for a serial killer. Like that's not you. Like she wanted to get in a relationship with somebody like why would you want to be in a relationship specifically with a serial killer? Shannon. So this is a thing. It's called hybristophilia. And it's when women, yeah, I learned a lot about the stuff

after all the accusations against me. Also, Shannon, it's pretty funny because you're coming out of it like the end of a horror movie where you survive something on a hill and a cabin. You know where you're covered in blood and now you're cleaned. It's like six months later and you go, I've learned about it.

It's called hybrids to feel you. It's called hyper-sick with filio. It's something I struggle with every day. And I know through God and my friends and family, what is it? Cause I haven't seen Shannon in a long time. What is the status of are you completely out of the convicted felon? Not completely. I won't say completely out of forever, but the one Properties damage property damage is still hot. You're totally out of it. Well the one guy that I was conversing with

We exchanged I think maybe three letters and then on his last letter to me I was just like I mean I'm out like I was really trying to at least have a conversation It was great material for everything at the very least. And I just, I couldn't go anywhere. Like there was just nothing. And you were about, you're one more letter from him doing the old, hey, you sent a couple bucks up to, I'm not. But this is the thing is,

you were two letters away from him being like, hey, why could you smoke on your pussy? I'm just saying. Yeah, what killed you? I'm not saying you would, but what could you fit? It's pretty hot. It's pretty hot. Could you fit a key or you just say?

I feel like a shiv. Maybe one big ziplock bag full of a bunch of small ziplock bags. I got a Latin king in here that's giving me kind of a problem. So if you could bring a shiv, I don't know. Are you still into felons? I, okay, I'm not going to say felons necessarily, but it's like, but I've had four boyfriends in my life. Two of them have been in jail at some point. It's not the fact that they're breaking the law.

It's just that that personality type sometimes is attached to a little more stronger and intimidating. I like someone who's scary on the outside, but then not an asshole in that complete dirt bag on the inside So you want to I'm taken yeah, sorry Shannon you just described my radio Well, I'm seeing so much at him and she's sitting right behind you and she will tell you I am violent danger something outside The inside of teddy bear warm gooey lovable. Hey, it'sverson, and I hope you enjoyed this week's Best of the Bond Fire. You can listen to the show live every Monday through Thursday from 6th to 8 PM Eastern on Comedy Central Radio Series XM95 or on demand on the Series XMF.

Be sure to follow us on social media at the Bond Fire at SexM. This has been a Comedy Central Podcast.