The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Run That Option (feat. Tim Butterly)

Episode Date: August 29, 2023

Tim Butterly tries to stay positive when watching the stand-up comedy of The Gronk!

I'm Bobby Kelly and it's Big J. O'Coursen. We're actually a full radio show on Series XM, not just a podcast. For full episodes of the Bonfire, you can listen on the Series XM app. Go to seriesexm.com slash Bonfire for a special offer. And now the Bonfire with Big J. O'Coursen and Robert Kelly. Now we did a band from Boston. New addition. Yeah, you're always the men's new addition though. I love new addition.

I can't argue. I really wanted to take the counterpoint on that, but I love new edition. This edition's the best. Doesn't that little squeaky voice? I didn't love them when he was a kid. Right at, if it isn't love, fantastic. Then they're adult stuff.

Can you stand the rain? Come on. Johnny Kill. It's very like Michael Jackson when he was a little kid. Oh my god. Oh my god, get those nappy he was a little kid. Oh my god. Get those nappy pussies all wet. Whoa.

What? No, I'm referring to the hair around black pussies. It's like very curly. Looks like Joel and Beads neck. Thank you for clearing that up. I thought you guys didn't know. He's S&P. He's standard in practices.

I was saying because they have little curly pubic hairs that are different than ours. I'm not saying anyone's better. I'm just saying we're all, no, I'm saying that we're different. We're all different. We're normal and black pussy's have different weird hairs. We're all the same, but different. We're gonna say about that, Mr. Positive. Who? Which is like I left. That's the Bonfire Faction Talk Series X I'm one of three big jokers in Robert Kelly

We're hanging out with Tim Butterly everybody He's got awesome podcasts called Dad Meen he's got another one called Field Trippin and he's going to be part of the Philly Comedy Festival happening September 3rd in Philadelphia phl comedy festival.com For tickets again that's phl comedy festival.com

For tickets Let's get back to some gronk Comforticates again, that's phl comedy festival.com For tickets, let's get back to some grunk speaking of Boston bullshit He's great. I changed my whole tune on this. Well, you let Tim influence you He's an influencer and I'm gonna really is an influencer. He really is. He wants I listen I'm kind of like the grunk of this show right now. Yeah, you're the anchor, dude. You're making me want to like it. And then I'm like, no, no, what am I doing? He sucks. I love it. Equal talent gap, you know what I mean?

Give us a little, steen. It's killing me. You know, back in the old days, my teammates and I, we used to go out on party hard. And I mean hard shots everywhere, bottles everywhere. My married teammates, they always wanted to hang in. They just can't. hard and I mean hard. Shots everywhere, bottles everywhere. My married team, they always wanted the hang and they just can't. They're not cool anymore in the club.

I'm throwing my hands in the air and they're throwing ear plugs in their ears. I'm going to shit. Because it's loud. You don't even want to hear straight when you're really seeing that. That's an evident shit. I'm like shit. Yeah.

I'm like shit is part of it because I'm like shit. Yeah. Yeah. I'm like shit. It's just partially because I'm like shit. So my married team is, you know, and he keeps going hood. He's coming in. You can hear in his, oh, mate. You can hear in his dry mouth that he's bombing in his head. He knows.

You can hear his just, yeah. He would, I see hands are in pocket. Look at his hands in the pocket. He would dress up, he would cover himself in glitter and wear fur boots in front of that girlfriend at a nightclub He refused to let her see this which does tell me he's at least self-aware a little bit. Yeah Because it's doesn't go it's not going good

You know what we keep interrupting like the audience I think they are giving it up and at the end of the day. That's your job Yeah, I think I get too deep into the craft on here. You guys have your job is to make them give it up. And you know what? Our job as comics is to give it up to people who try and try to do it. It's hard. Yeah. The result is almost independent of the effort, you know. And obviously you didn't try at all. I don't know. I don't even know what you just said, but I agree with it. I think thank you. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. We just did great comedy right there.

You know, we sorted out who gets it given up in the shit. I don't know why I see Bobby and Tim out in a desert doing peyote together. I see it now. That's what I see. Everyone who tries deserves a little credit for at least giving it a go. And I'm over here judging people. Tell me, lead me dude. I want to get the bell buckle down.

Tim walk me through the planes of existence dude. Back up let's hear the crowd give it up a little bit. Ten seconds back. It's one of the hangin'. They just can't. They're not cool anymore in the club. I'm throwing my hands in the air and they're throwing earplugs in their ears so much.

Yeah. Yeah, you know. I get it, but it's not for everyone. It's not okay, this is a big theater, and you're hearing individual laugh, Seth. Yeah. That's because he changed the ear to air. He said, I'm throwing my hands in the air and they're putting air plugs

in their ears. Yeah, he fucked it up. Should have made them more similar. Yeah, play it. Funny. I'm like, oh, come on, let's go. I've developed some nightclub skills that you guys just can't handle. I can hold a drink on the crowded dance floor. I can request a song I can take my shirt off and guess what I won't even spill a single drop Hey, Jay, wait, I'm waiting I Gave it up the shit ain't easy. Are they are they are they not giving it up right? Yeah, yeah, I'm giving it up myself. Case closed. Most humble things of art. It's my first time. My first time.

Oh, I've taken his clothes off. I'm taking my clothes off. Just kidding. No, just kidding again. Are you treating me again? Double you gave you the double win. We can't be guessing dude. This is a true respect I don't know what he's gonna do next dude. I gotta know what is this guy capable of Where's his going he's so good looking though, right? I don't know Christine? Yeah, yeah, okay, she said yeah He's so good looking though, right? I don't know. Christine? Yeah? Yeah. Okay, she said yeah.

I mean, he kind of has like, do face, but look at his body. Don't we all? What's over his body? He looks like if they gave a, um, what's his name? Bradley Cooper, Captain America Juice. Yeah. Or the Hulk, maybe. Now I understand how you chicks feel when you see me.

Oh, sweaty and wet. Nice. Nice. Yeah. I just don't know what comic. Here's the thing. I don't know what comic in the back. You think that they had to agree with him

or never had the ball sack to go. The over bragging about how hot girls think you are. That doesn't win the crowd. I mean, all the comics it right now. They're just off to the side of the stage congratulating Matt Rife for writing all those I know you girls are soggy in your fat pussy's right now. I wouldn't fuck half of you pigs. Yeah Thank you. Thank you. It's my first time. Thank you Thank you. You know, I'm out there a party in Harb with my hands in the urr. And then now these guys are over there putting earplugs in their ears. Y'all can't handle it. Y'all can't handle it. Y'all can't

handle it. Every time I try to party, y'all can't handle it. I'm gonna take my shirt off. Now I am. Y'all you can't handle it. I'm gonna take my shirt off. Nah, I am. Y'all, you can't handle it. Look, you girls are all wet in your pussies. Thank you. Thank you. It's my first time. Thank you. Thank you. I mean, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this

is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this If you brought a hot friend also, it's my first time now Seriously, can you handle that? They can never handle it. I'd be over there fucking them girls Yo, but for real I get pussy But seriously guys all jokes aside. I do stay crush and ask and that's pretty hot I just came up with that one

Don't do it, James I just came up with that one. Oh, good. Don't do it, James. It's a massive equipment, please. You can put it that way. You know? All right. My football skills, they come in handy in my life. By the way, has he been on for like 55 minutes already?

He's been four minutes, but it's taken a whole show. Oh, there's five minutes. I mean, this is nuts. It's nuts. I love Grog, but this is nuts. It's taking our host show. Oh, there's my I love Grog, but this is I mean this is this is not the truth. I hope that I just want one and he created terrific radio Go rock dude

I'm glad I'm here with the past friend This last joke is gonna do well. This is the one this is probably good shit. Yeah. This last joke is going to do well. This is the one. This is probably the one. Yeah. I have to bring my football skills into the club once in a while. I see an X coming at me. I'm running a post pattern right into that lift.

I'm out of here. Lift. Oh, here comes a Swiss... This smells like a British elevator instead of car service. I don't think he knows what lift is. I don't think he knows what it meant. I don't think he knows what it meant. I think whoever wrote it for, put that in there. I see a girl I used to fuck with, I had for the Lou.

Yeah, he thinks it's an elevator. Yeah, we had to get into the lift, took her back to my flat. And she was my mate. Back up a little bit, Christine. Now is the time to insult women he won't fuck. I'll just go into the club once in a while. I see an ex coming at me. I'm running a post pattern right into that lift.

I'm out of here. I'm out of my way. Do you think it said pause it and go back again? Do you think it said I'm out of here? I'm out. I'm out. Swing like your hand and a... First of all, I think it has a hearing disability. That's why he said I'm a real

That's the more I don't know how I'm like that. I totally think my teeth in it. I feel like he's actually was a named saving a child For choir. I'm as a speaker. I'm a speaker. I'm a speaker. He's off balance. I I crushed pussy good. It's funny how he's getting more ghetto as he's bombing Oh, yeah, he started as a white guy and now he's doing deaf jam now. He's like just salvage pussy at this point I ain't scowl to you motherfuckers salvage the view I ain't scouting them aren't buckers DJ Ponte Tonech shed off Did you put it again? I ain't scared you motherfuckers

KICKER Y'all don't understand Wow, I see an X coming at me I'm running a post pattern right into that lift I'm out of here Oh here comes Miss Wasted Loudmouth Oh Rob suck my teeth Know something time to call that all the bull

and get the fuck out of here and leave. I'm still on that day. I'm gonna take that day. Oh! Oh! I said he's both puppies. Oh! Y'all all the longer than I said.

I'm a suck-dote ditty. Beech egg cut! I said I never suck no titties. Keggy! He's kicked her in a fucking cat way. Suck my titties, suck my titties, oh suck no titties KICK IT! It's KICKed her in a fucking cat way Suck my titties, suck my titties, oh suck my titties What? Man, I see a jigger more, hit that limp, suck my titties

Back it up, Christine, I need to hear the sucker Tits suck my titties like She said what titties taste like? I'm out of here Then there's another girl, hey, right, it's a lock going on It's club by the way Hey, get security, bro Axe coming at me I'm running running a post pattern right into that lift. I'm out of here. I'm all here comes miss waste of loud mouth. Oh

Rob suck my tea. He's Know something call that all the bone get the fuck out of here and lead We go back to get the fuck out of here. Did he go and lead you time to go then get the fuck out of here and leave He's such a blocky idiot. Well, he's just doing some physical act doubts. You know what I mean positive Bob He's study the crap He's he's doing act doubts. He's adding he's doing everything when you do stand-up You should have every type of stand-up in your act. Wordplay, analogies, personal stories. Characters.

He's really painting the sitcom for you. Suck my titties. Suck my titties, Rob. That's his new sitcom title. Suck my titties, Rob, with a giant exclamation point after it. On this week of Suck my titties, Rob. Oh, Rob, Suck my titties, Suck the titties. I mean, Biggest Fan.

Every time someone says Suck my titties, suck the titties, I'm your biggest fan. Every time someone says suck my titties, the studio audience. Oh! That's the real thing. Oh my god, this is forever. It's a five minute set. It's literally a five minute set. It's not forever. Oh my god, man.

This feels like my life. I'm sorry. I'm very sorry, I ruined your show. No. You've taken Bob to any whole new level. My titties, I'm sorry. I'm very sorry, I ruined your show. Oh, you've taken Bob to a new, whole new level. My dear, it is I'm your biggest fan. You know something time to call that all the boy and get the fuck out of here and leave. Precious ends with him saying a fat black woman

comes up to him when he bails. Shit, there's a chick that already banged my teammate and has a kid with him. Oh, time to run that option, getting the fuck out. Oh, you're cool. Wow. And has a kid with him. Oh time to run that option getting the fuck out option I should play quarterback run that option baby Option all nice that it I'm gathering that is a football play. Oh, I think he was a shirt here He's a bit of a shirt. Well, he used the word option three times and three different funny ways and every three and every

World three, but come on every woman left. Yeah, and that woman knows we're talking Dude he's built the anticipation Why is he not more afraid? Why did they flood the stage with fog? Why is the fog machine on? Chambaya. He's chained. He's chained. He's chained.

He's humiliated. Why is he not afraid at all? That's what I can't get. He's like, oh, but They were probably even like probably get bail early for you guys fine What else oh fat pig girl come up to me and be like Rob was sucky dick and like beat it pig Thank you That is my first time. I'm gonna. You guys want to see my nips? I'm on that Tom Brady plans Next thing I knew this next you're going ro-rope dick too big you hurt it's her I'm like bitch beat it run the option the option

One more Yeah, three options comedy comes in three The rolls and threes and he knows that instinctually Christine back it up 10 seconds It's never enough for me. I need to hear the option one again. Yeah, go back to the option. He's right. I gotta hear that.

That's it. By the way, parentheses, me and Bobby both did late night appearances on NBC at years was, I did Carson daily in the tonight show. Tonight show it was, you warned me of this when you watched it to sell over to everybody. When I went to watch my the seller with that Tarsen day when I did my Fowl and thing and we watch it to sell you were like Don't do that you tell me in the steps downstairs the seller goes don't watch it here

I was like, well everyone's coming. He's like don't watch it here. He goes because you can't hear great They're gonna put this uh, you're gonna put the they always have the clothes captioning on and he goes when I came out and did a joke It's said in parentheses several times light laughter. Yeah They always have the closed captioning on and he goes, when I came out and did a joke, it said in parentheses several times, light laughter. He's gonna hurt so much. My very first thing I came out there, light laughter, light laughter several times through it. This closed captioning, look what it says when he goes,

wooing and it's like, they're losing their minds, it says. Yeah, cause he's scratching. Yeah, squirting. Squirting cause he's scratching. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Squirting. It's blasting. Moning. Yeah, the chuk writing the closed caption is topless right now.

Theater seats being saturated. One man completely evacuated his bowels with laughter. This was laughter. Here comes Miss Waste's left, Bill. Rob, suck my titties, suck my titties, I'm the biggest fan. You know something time to call that all the bull and get the fuck out of here and leave.

All the bulls, all the bulls. Wait. Oh shit, there's a chick that already banged my teammate and has a kid with him. Oh, time to run that option, getting the fuck out. He almost took off. He almost took off full of feet. He can't turn it off.

I'll play cool back from that option. The second option is where the real, you know what I mean? You're doing the love master, dude. And Stink's really, he was like, option, that got a pop. And he's an option. Well, if you hear it. And then he's a member when I just said option. Hear the pop. Hear the pop.

Can we just hear the option? Please go back and do the pop. He's doing, he's crank shoemaker, and he's love mastering as a home when it didn't an option, babe. And he didn't act out a really fast run just to let us know he's running Yeah, so you know the option involves him running right My teammate has a kid with him. Oh time to run that option getting the fuck out Option option I should play quarterback run that option, baby

Ladies I'm looking pretty cheering and whooping. I think they're talking about the cost. Hey what can I say I'm on Tom Brady's workout plan now. Laughter solid laughter. That will be big. Yeah. That will be is the women pounding miracle that tourists It's dodgy's buzzing This is this is pocket rockets zizzing all over the room Remote control panties making zapping sounds

You only hear women screaming. I mean, like I've never heard them before. Is it, were they told to do this? No, no. No, they're just dumb women that are so in love with Crock, whatever he says. You have to tell G's to honk, you know? If you look in the crowd, this guy's just staring at the stage going, I fucking hate my wife. I promise because I've experienced this.

After that show, and they were all hanging out, if there was a comic on here who killed, killed, a girl will walk up to Grunkowski and send him all night. He was the best, while you were actually the funniest in the show, even insulting the other guys, like you should get the other people. I was bored with the other people, but like you were so good, he'll get that all night.

So why would he think he's doing bad? In fact, according to Tim, he's doing fantastic. I mean, he triggered ovulations for every human in the theater at the same time. Everyone's synced up. What the fuck? Dude, I've never originally heard an option joke. I swear. Ever.

Anytime I've written an option into a joke, I've thought about go I don't think the chicks are gonna get it It looks like the chicks are the only ones getting it you know, let me tell them again with my shirt off I haven't tried this one. I haven't tried this one on to peel down yet. I like the second option is really I mean brilliant It's like option. She goes out. I had to run the option get the fuck out And he walks away from the mic. He comes back. He goes out, I had to run the option, get the fuck out. And he walks away from the mic, he comes back, he goes. Option. Oh, I can go back to it. But then he goes, a third option. No, then he goes, he goes, be a quarter back myself

on that option, baby. Yeah. But this second option, when he comes back, he just makes his way back to the mic. Option. Yeah, it's like the evil dead when he just goes work shed. Just out of the blue. Work shed. Work shed. Good. It's like the evil dead when he just goes work shed Just out of the blue work shed work shed good

Oh shit, there's a chick that already banged my teammate and has a kid with him. Oh time to run that option getting the fuck out Option I should play quarterback run that option baby record it back on that option baby. Oh, we refer to that as a callback. That's it. From earlier, from five seconds earlier, when he just said option to the war, he was referencing that. Everybody just enough time to forget about it. He took it back here.

He did a callback tag. It's a callback tag. It's two for one, dude. Come on. This is one of the most dense comedy sets of all time bang for your buckwise. Yeah It's brilliant this this set is thick with material I Mean it's stupid funny. Oh shit keep going cheer me Cheer me woopie. You're pretty jacked right now, you wanna see? Yeah.

Woo! Woo! That's the nice smile so far. Hey, what did I say? I'm on Tom Brady's workout plan now. It would be great if he did pull out his cock and just start jizzing on the front row. Cheer like whooping. Wait a minute, this isn't what I want.

I'm with my daughter. We were both cheering and whooping. Why did you make it like this now? Option. Option. Pretty sure when money goes fat pig comes in. Oh man. Alright, alright.

So I'm still in the club. You know, I got to run some patterns and shit. And then all of a sudden I see big booty. Oh, big booty. Oh, shot wreaking. I'm like, damn, that booty is huge. And she's coming at me shaking it. She's like, oh, Rob. I just want to be grunked. I'm like, damn, that booty's huge. She's coming at me, shaking it, she's like, oh, Rob,

I just want to be grunked. I'm like, oh, damn, this booty was so big, I had to run a fly pat and right to my house. So I'm so good at football. I use my skills at all times. In the club, off the field, in my house, it don't matter. I go out there. Option.

That would have been a good place for another option. Yeah, you think my wife would like it if I started grunking on the booty? LAUGHTER I'm like, I'm my fucking gronk, I rock tonight, dude. This is a go- Timothy, what was that? You guys got an idiot. I just got gronked. He got gronked.

He was brand the option, gronked you. No, I need to bring in, there is a Rodic fanfiction about getting gronked that was written. There are books, published books of erotic fanfiction in background, Kalski. It's great. Christine Pitsch. Oh, he's party, he's party.

More like I'm running routes in the club to get away from all these bitches. Yeah, and then you wanna, you wanna state the premise more for more times when you have jokes in. Because, because if they forget then the jokes are not gonna make sense. No, I don't need to tell you. You probably forgot, but in case you aren't, in case you guys just walked in, these are things I have to do football related in the club. We only do things that I have. Any awareness of. Where I was

partying after winning the Super Bowl. And Tom Brandy has a diet plan on. And Tom Brandy doesn't eat food, he has a good food. Which made me jacked,ed you'll remember and he's like tying all the beans together at the is the perfect I mean this is a nine minute forty second special. Yeah, this is like I feel like the guy who realized after Kevin Spacey walked out that he was Kaiser so say I want to know I want to know seeing all the clues in the room is wait. He is jacked He's not a football mentally he plays football the option. Okay Big booty host Cherokee by the way, he also can't read so he says Cherokee yeah, because it's Q. You I think please go back to that I need to hear it again though

Where you got it? He says big booty ho twice, too. Yeah big booty booty ho. Big booty ho. Because he saw the word. He's meaning a picture, Jay. Be funny if they wrote it twice by accident. Big booty ho. Big booty ho. That's my option. Option. Option. He's just reading what they wrote.

Oh, son, I see big booty ho. Big booty ho. Shot wreaking. I'm like, damn, that booty is. She's coming at me shaking. And she's like, oh, Rob, I just want to be grumpy. I'm like, oh, Sha'erica, I'm like, damn, that's two days. She's coming at me shaking, and she's like, oh, Rob, I just want to be grumped. I'm like, oh, damn, this booty was so big,

I had to run a fly pad and right to my house. So I'm so good at football. I use my skills at all times. In the club, off the field, in my house, it don't matter. Everyone's like, oh, he's party, he's party. More like I'm running routes in the club, but get away from all these bitches And I usually run and I let my brother come in he looks like me and then you know, what oh, gronk

Let me take it. Oh, he takes them home Pretty sure we that's right, you know legal press picture that is now me doable. Yeah Literally, I think right he goes sexual. Wait. You's me too. That's literally, I think, right? He goes sexual assault. Wait, you're not Rob, he goes, you did get grunk, though. Option. We got to be ready for last minute option, and my brother came in and grunked you. Yeah.

You still got technically grunked. I'm pretty sure a comedian got in trouble for that. Your honor was my client grunked or no, or no. She's like, have you seen my underwear? He's like, why don't you run a fly pattern to the lift? Oh. Oh, damn. I hope we make it in the documentary about his downfall. Have you seen my underwear? He's like, why don't you run a fly pattern to the lift? I hope we make it into the documentary about his downfall. How'd you do, he goes, thanks so much.

You're just so cool being a boss and I love being your brother. Oh, there he is. Hey, bro. Yep, ladies, that's him. You want to take him home? Too bad. All right. So you meet these hot chicks. His brother at his brother's comedy show is wearing a metal helmet thing. He's wearing a hard hat, I believe, right?

It looked like it. A hard hat with a necklace. Yep. Yeah, he's like, like, with Marty Groschit. It's probably like a beer helmet. Yeah. Yeah. Tim, you want to take him home?

Too bad. Nice, Nick. Nice. So you meet these hot chicks all the time, but the other side of the story is when you meet that girl that ain't so cute, and they ask for everything. Can you buy me a purse? Can you buy me a plane ticket?

Yo, Grant, can you bring me to Italy, please? I want to see that Eiffel Tower you're always talking about. That's France. Even though that's in France. Don't miss. Oh, no, you've got to be picked up. You picked it up. Oh, shick, girl, how about I bring you to the mall

and get you that new perfume extortion by Lori L Guys true That's a panic move that's the first panic Because you say it's true joking right now. This is that guy's free. You know, I mean this is my life You guys really important extortion by Lori L. No it's true, guys. No, look it up. Yeah, it's out there. It sounds like I'm joking around, and I can see why you guys would be tricked, but I'm telling you for real.

Seriously, dude. I'm just fucking with you right here, but this actually is part of the show where I'm gonna take a real. You're saying what he's doing is he's showing, he's coming from a real place. That's vulnerability. That's vulnerability, which is the best type of comedy. I mean, a lot of people aren't

Comfortable with it. No, he's also showing emotional Complexity by just putting that part of himself out there. He's getting distorted. This is a masterpiece Should be a Ted talk about comedy. I want to know what they cut. I want to see that He just he opened with 56 minutes. There's so much on the floor. I'm in no rush to get Mary to have kids, all because I'm trying to bang more than once a month. I talked to all my teammates,

you know, Grant, man, did you get laid this way? My wife won't even bang me. I'm like, dude, you just scored four touchdowns. I know I had a jack-off still. I'm like, dude, you just score four touchdowns. I know I had a jack off still. I'm like, Ninkovitch, you had five sacks, two interceptions. A fumble recovery to the touchdown. And we won the game because of that fumble recovery. He's like, I know, but I had a jack off to RedTube tonight.

I'm like, what's your life like, dude? I'm like, what's your life like, dude? I'm like, what's your life like, dude? I'm like, what's your life like, dude? He called me to tell me jerked off. Took us a day to the night. You got to read to me. And I called you right after. I'm like, what's your life like, dude? Tell me about all the patterns you're wearing in the clubs. Tell me about the pussy, Grog.

Did you have to Grog that pussy? Did you Grog, did you Grog, did you Grog anywhere in the month? Yeah, dude, I'd be Grog in the whole week. Oh, week. The complexity of that joke. It's layered, it's teared. It's very teared because he went through the hall, the stuff he did in that game, and they won.

That's the perfect pause right there. Just a head scratching blank stare. I don't know. Every time more words pop up on that, prom three's like, fuck. Making fun of Ninkle. You wanna know why? Because he's my ninco bitch All right, everyone Thank you so much for having me up here. I'll bring out the real comedians now

Don't say real. If you're a young comedian, not say real, dude. If you're a young comedian out there thinking about doing this, they should watch this set. This is 101 stuff. This is 101. This is...

Christine, get to a sketch, please. Hip sketches. One sketch. Oh, one sketch. Who's the first guy? Oh, that's Justin McKinney. He's hilarious. He's hilarious.

That comes on this. They just used Grunk's name. No, but they know I'm telling you, but the comics suffer because like, they just want to see Grunk. And they're just like, they're just like, they should get Justin on and have them tell us what they were saying behind the scenes. Lenny Clark, this guy's like a Boston. You know that? We should get Justin on and see what the fuck were you guys saying backstage? Well, this was happened?

Jay Jay either one of them. Lenny Clark Lenny Clark. He's not gonna read Lenny him for friends. Just there's a yeah, there's a sketch. There's one. Great. This should be good though. Because it does act out good. He's a good actor. Thank you. Rob, um, when are we going on that date? Sorry, I make out before going on dates. But we're already boyfriend and girlfriend.

Yeah, that's what they all say. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey You got any to agree to it? Do you manscape Jesus? What? Yeah, not that I was focused on it, but I always see you without your shirt on, you have no hair. What do you like, half dolphin? You know, I shaved my junk, you know, cause it makes me feel younger. What's wrong with you, Lenny?

What's wrong with you, thanks. Thank you, Lenny. Uh, any more football questions. Hey brother. What's up bro? Uh, you need any help? No, I got this. I mean I'm struggling Hey, bro. All right good. Well mom brought you an extra change of clothes for real? Yeah, they're in the back

If you need any muscle putting on mountain, let me know all right appreciate it bro Thank you guys for coming out and that's it for Rob Runkowski and Thanks for being professional shit Let's go back. There's another sketch there. No. Every break. No.

I'm pretty sure. No. I can't do this. Almost positive. Every break. I can't watch this fucking. I can't. I'm pulling for this guy.

You said his name was Rob. You should have been doing it. You should have been doing a set at the Philly Comedy Festival. We're gonna afford him. You know? Just go right before. There we go. Another press conference. Give it. Oh

Man, we're watching reverse order like memento. I'm not gonna understand any of this Are you guys enjoy the rest of show I'm J. Lars and thank you very much. I love J love J. Larsen. All right guys We're gonna be in and out All right guys, so we're gonna be in and out Please grunk has a busy schedule. I've never had more people involved in a project It looks like everyone feels doing someone else a favor You know, I mean like everyone's like so you're here. I'm it scheme And then this is your team of favors out and then they will then those people will be there your team I just don't understand the bit why you weren't asked to do this

I just that he would have been. Why you weren't asked to do this? I just think he's you would have been right in that fucking press conference audience going grunt quick question when you were in the option on a fat bitch do you have to fly pattern to look get out of here one of his one of his bits would end it with dude I like jacking up on those titties dead dude I like jacking up on those titties dead dude. This to football questions only, all right? Do not deviate from football questions. And remember the golden rule, do not embarrass yourselves or your publication or me.

This is unnecessary dialogue. Hey, it's a damn Hobbit feed off the podium. Thank you. Let's get this started. Rock. Get your damn hobbit feed off the podium. Thank you. Let's get to start it. Uh, rock. E-O. E-O. E-O. Uh, you sir in the front. E-O. Bobby Goons from Bada Bang Magazine.

Uh, I get a cake and a couple of chicks in my pickup. You want to come and do some high school shit with me? Next, please. What the heck? E-O. Jay, the wife and I, we've been thinking about maybe a threesome, and I don't know if that's something that you're open to, if something we could start a dialogue. Did you know what a threesome is?

Yes. A threesome is two chicks, one dude. If it's you and I and your wife, that's a double teen. Yeah, that's a good, that's a good one. So if you want a double-teamer, then that's okay. I'm done with that maybe. Okay. But she might not want you in it. Yeah, see, once I get going, she's gonna be like,

oh, I want Rob's flowing. Yeah, that's that. Oh, stick to foot. I mean, this is fucking, I'm hoping H is. Oh, Tim. Oh, Tim. You see, you know, have piped down a little bit over there? That's, yeah.

Jesus, that's okay. It's positive. I'm fucking on the road forever. This is where I stood, Jason Ellison, the hot boy. He's like, let me drink in the whole piece before I come. I'd rather be the photographer at that, Jason Ellison. I was like, shoot. I'd rather be a key grip for Jason Ellison,

he's only fans. I'd rather be on the receiving end of this year. I'd rather be the key. I'd rather be the key. I'd rather be the key. I'd rather be on the receiving end of this year. I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the,

I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the,

I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd rather be the, I'd the fucking birds. I'm voting for the bird. This is so fast. Let me be honest and fair at least here though.

When this came out, I laughed with my agent about it. Let's see, and he goes, he goes, yeah, I know. I was just like, there's money in it. Like people do want to see, you know, it's like there's a money catch basically. He goes, we're thinking about having like Joel M.B. do it. He goes, you wouldn't do it if like Joel M.B. did it? I go, I would immediately do it.

Yeah. I would be on this in five seconds. It's good. A season two, Grunk two. I'd be like option option. Yeah. What is it? Unsports,

Unsports and McComberley, comedy two getting grunked. You see me really pushing the accent. Hey, Grunk Bob Kelly here. Hi, Doug. You know me, Bob Kelly, prominent sportsman. He stood him on the bonfire. I took off a dance out of you know him. I would fucking be honest in two

seconds. I'm gonna do it. If sportsmen like comedy too, yeah, electric bronkel, though, quick question, drunk, will you do it all the titties? You don't have time to suck. I'll take my answer off the air. We got to take a break. No one's ever come to me up to and from me, no, we can finish the sketch for sure oh sure I want to take a break I don't need it we need to break a break for the show but I need to break from this just almost over I'm fucking numb it's almost it's one minute left tops yeah cover all of madden 17 congratulations do you think

do you think it's appropriate for the cover athlete to drop passes on fourth and go? Oh, that's a video game, bro. Get a life. I had a life. All right. My kid beat me. Bronk is eight. I press triangle gromp cap I feel bad for these comics who are hilarious fucking comics. I mean really funny. I mean Lenny Clark is Everybody want to be a part everybody wanted to be a part of that special because you mean drunk. I tell you right Lenny Clark's Allegiance J I mean Justin they're a caper out there all killers drunk. Yes That thing was stacked. I don't know how to end it up like that option option option option Option, we're going to have a Tim butterly everybody to fill a comedy festival September 3rd P.H.L. Comedy Festival dot com Four tickets get him that there it is Bobby Kelly. That's Bobby Kelly singing

Tim's also got two great podcasts dad meet and field trip and Check out Robert Kelly live and brother for New Jersey Saturday September 20th 30th of that Skank, Fez Vegas Rochester Madison, Kansas City for tickets and all tour dates Robert Kelly live dot com the Skanks. Yeah. Coming to you this week and everybody Thursday Friday tomorrow, Friday Saturday, new Hampshire. I'm gonna be the Thursday. Bobby Kelly gonna be there with us on Thursday. It's gonna be such a we built such a fun and show around this. Yeah, it's gonna be great. We're doing New Hampshire Boston and Connecticut after that. I'm in Tulsa Don you beach Florida Indianapolis

And of course mean Irish if you're doing a crowd work show at the bitter end September 1st So check that out you need me to come down and do the mic in the crowd for five hours No, but let me know no, but no, but thank you for that I was. No, but let me know. No, but no, but thank you for that. It was. I'll come down to that. Just let me get hydrated before I go. We'll be right back. I think it's the bonfire. See you guys later. Hey, everybody. Thanks for listening. That was just a portion of our actual serious XM radio show. If you want the whole thing, go to seriousxm.com slash bonfire for a special offer. show.