The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Sharia Law

Episode Date: November 25, 2025

In an episode never aired as a podcast, the list of comedians that are performing the Riyadh Festival in Saudi Arabia has just come out. This is news to Bobby and Jay, so they research Saudi Arabia and have questions. How are women actually treated in their culture? If Jay goes, should he bring Christine, or leave her behind? Bobby speculates on how opulent the accommodations will be. *To hear the full show to go www.siriusxm.com/bonfire to learn more! FOLLOW THE CREW ON SOCIAL MEDIA: @thebonfiresxm @louisjohnson @christinemevans @bigjayoakerson @robertkellylive @louwitzkee @jjbwolf Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of The Bonfire ad-free and a whole week early.  Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

And now, the bonfire with Big J. O'Kerson and Robert Kelly. As soon as Tim Dillon gets off stay, thank you, good night. You hear the jet of the plane. He's gone. My plane will be outside momentarily. God bless America. I love Tim. That's his post. Tim Dillon, get over.

We're taking the money. Some of the biggest U.S. comedians will get $1 million for one show in Saudi Arabia. Dylan says he's getting paid to look the other way and slaves there are probably proud of building nice hotels I love this backdrop is the beach Oh shit that's really funny Yeah I talked to Santino I called him about it

Yeah Yeah it bothers me because Max's new favorite podcast is bad friends Really? Yeah I catch him listening to it all the time and it infuriates me Interesting So I called Santino about it and he's like yeah I'm fucking taking the money. It's a lot of money.

Yeah. Yeah, they're all just, like, suck my dick. They found the, this is how much it costs to get me to turn my back on the United States of America. You know, they all have to, at the end of the show, burn a flag. You know that, right? I hope so. Yeah, they all have to burn an American flag. Just denounce America in general.

They should deny America, yeah. They all have to put on those little head things. I hope they make Whitney and Jessica. wear full garb. Oh, they have to wear what is it, a hajib, right? A burqa. All of it. Oh, that'd be so funny. They're at the beach. A babushka. They're at the beach. They look like sea ninjas.

Oh, this is going to be great, dude. Jessica, sweating her ass, sweltering in the desert. With a fucking full Swami costume on. God damn. She'll put it on backwards for a gag. I wonder what my number is. To talk about the, good to go there and talk Titanic for an hour? Your number?

I would say, I'm going to tell you, I would say, I would say 10 grand for you. 10 grand? 10 grand, I would have to do it. Yeah, I think Aaron Berg. I think Aaron Berg said we go for five grand and nice accommodations. Yeah. And a first class flight. First class, I would insist.

First class, like. Aaron would do a show for Hitler for five grand. I said you couldn't get me on this one. Like the things are trying to use to sell people outside of the money. The money is the only sell for me. Yeah. You're never going to sell me on. an amazing flight for 12 hours.

There's no such thing. You're not good. Have you seen those? Emirates? That's not what they're taking you on, though. Okay. But if they did offer me Emirates, like that, when you get your own studio?

They might, you know what? They might be doing that for Bill Burr. I mean, I would say they would be. He'll never tell you because he's going to pretend he's humble. That's going to suck when he's going to pretend he's humble. He'll pretend he's humble. Dad, they gave me a, I don't need this, dude. Yeah.

I gave my room away. I gave my room to Ian Finance. I think Bill's going to helicopter there from his house. You take the barocopter. No, they don't, they actually fly. To the barocopter. I'll do it if you, I want my helicopter over there, too, just in case. You're going to ship my helicopter.

Hey, hon, I'll be in the hangar. When is this? Dude, flying. Flying Emirates, first class, studio, that is a... 12 hours is 12 hours, though. Yeah, but 12 hours. in your own fucking bed. So that's crazy.

So that amenity could be amazing, but I'm saying if I was on this, if I was asked to do this, I'm certainly guarantee you they wouldn't be offering to put me in one of those things at all. As I'm picturing myself going to this. You'd just be in first class.

First class. Yeah, not the... 12 hours in first class is 12 hours on a plane. So yeah, they probably give Bill Burr, they're given... Sebastian, maybe. Ashton, those little students.

The arena people. Yeah, the arena people. I would actually assume that none of them are getting that either, the studios, but maybe, if anybody is. Dude, look at that. You get your own shower. You can shower. Would you shower in the air? No.

You would not take a shower. If there was a shower, it was your shower, nobody else's shower. In your room, in your suite, you could just walk down the hall. If I had to go to, if I had to do something right afterwards. The first thing I would do is shower. It's like tank water, though. It's like showering in the RV. It is.

You're showering at 37,000 feet. Yeah. With fucking the same water you're fucking dumping in. It doesn't matter how expensive the ticket is still in a tank. It's fucking water. It's tank water. What do you think your water is? Don't drink it.

Well, your water's in a tank in your house, their apartment you lived in. A septic. That's a tank thing at the top of the building. I bet they're using the bus tank. That's in a tank thing at the top of your building. I bet you're still not supposed to drink it. I mean, I'm just making that out because I saw a tank on the top of the building. It was on the water towers in the city.

Yeah. On top of the buildings. I would 100% take a shower if there was a shower available. I would definitely sleep in the bed. Sure. I would do every... You would use all the amenities. I am that guy.

Well, let me finish... I put the slippers on. I put the PJs on. I would use whatever face creams, even though I don't do that. I would get the little... I would use the eye patch. I put that on, even though I don't like that either. Oh, I want to start doing that more nightly.

I want to start putting the little sticky things under your eyes. You do? I do. Let's just slow down. Let's pump the brakes. Let's deal with the disco lights first. And then let's go to officials. No one knows what you're talking about.

No one knows what you're talking about disco lights. You're getting... The world's going to find out on Thursday. Listen on Thursday and the world will find out on Thursday. And then by Monday, I'm a different person. You're close. By Monday, look out. Yeah, Monday start your...

cucumber peel eye things yeah um what do this call christine a little under the eye things well there's a this is peptide collagen yeah that's the ones yeah those are for women yeah korean good stuff nice you can't put those on your face why not why do you say that because you're not a woman those are the sticky ones too right they come in blue bobby what the fuck does that mean you don't have to have the pink it's baby it's for guys if they come in for guys they're black or camo they have black ones we'll get camo and i'll do it I'm going to get an American flag eye patch. Are those the stickies?

Yeah. It sounds silly. Ooh, look at these skulls. Oh, my God. Oh, there's skulls on those. Oh, there you go. Do that. That's cool.

That's cool of that. Now, what does it do exactly? I think it's supposed to make your eyes not puffy when you wake up. That's not really that much of a thing. It looks cool, though. The black ones look cool. You look special ops. Oh, so, oh, Bobby, look, there's camo.

Do they have camo? Yeah, do camo. No, those are just sleeping masks. Oh, so you could sleep hidden. I would definitely do Emirates, if they offered you Emirates. Okay, well, you're saying you're saying in Emirates first class in general. Sweet. I do first class, too.

Emeritus first class is amazing. I got you, but I'm saying you're just, that's just the flight. Yep. I'm just telling you my already checkout of not giving a shit about going to this thing is 12 hours on a plane no matter what. And I'm not going to be in a suite. I don't know. So then when you get there, the accommodations are going to have, I'm assuming. That would be crazy.

are not of right but they're going to be crazy in the not way that i want it all you don't want saddam hussein yes gold toilet yes you know you don't want it's going to be weird old pictures gigantic pictures with super high ceilings type shit you don't want a real saber on the wall i don't want a saber in the i'd prefer to have a saber in the room at all yeah i'd like to not have a saber but do you get what i'm saying so it's like the things that are that are going to That's nice. What is it? That's a hotel that they're staying at.

How do you know that? Because I don't know who cares. Oh. We can just say it is. Nobody's going to do research. Well, no one even knows what we're looking at. That's a hotel in Saudi Arabia, probably where they're putting all the guys and girls. It's in the place.

Riyadh. Is that how you say it? I have no idea. Rihata. Yeah, dude. They have really nice hotels now. You're not staying in some old fucking tent. That does look very nice, by the way, right there.

Yeah. Yeah. I bet the hotel they're staying in is going to be one. of the nicest hotels in the world i thought it was going to be a uh i mean yeah it's going to be the best it's filled with money it's going to it's the richest people in the world there's a four seasons yes yeah dude it's yeah as a dude i think it's a great place look at that would you wouldn't stay in that hotel is it the four seasons yeah dude i would go for the hundred thousand now come on let's go yeah lot of tech to me again i'll go for the hundred care dude i'll go for jacob's five

thousand if they give me that hotel and one of those sweets i'll wear a burghers You're basically wearing one now How do I know which room is mine If I don't understand If I don't understand salary numbers That hotel is sick Four seasons That can't be at the fucking four seasons

Buddy Yeah, it's fucking crazy That's incredible They're the richest people in the world Dude, they have the best of everything These people are gonna be Not women Huh?

They don't have the best of women You don't know that You've never seen them You goddamn right You can't see them But you think when they're living under there That they're taking care of their hairs

And armpits and all that shit Probably. How funny it would be if all the women are smoking hot? They are. And we just don't know. And none of them are baddies. What does that mean? Oh, baddies.

You mean their hair is real? I cannot wait to let my car do disco dances to this song. Oh, dude. Yeah, dude, this is, they're going to be treated. They're going to be treated like kings and queens or just kings. And gays. And gayes. They're going to be treated like kings, queens,

and then eventually all of them will be treated like gays. So how many days is it a festival? Is that what it is, a comedy festival? Yeah. So the people that have book in this are making so much money. You think? Yeah. Bruce.

Oh my God. What a fucking connection that is. JFL. I like JFL goes under in Montreal and reopens in Saudi Arabia. Wait, this is JFL? It's Bruce. It's Bruce from JFL. Really?

Yeah. But he doesn't work for it. I don't think he works for, JFL anymore. No, he works for the Saudi Arabian government. He's been a sleeper cell. Well, yeah. Skangfest, New Orleans, this November. Yeah, I heard I want to do Skankfest Saudi.

You guys aren't do Skankfest Saudi? I want to do Skankfest Iraq. Bruce Hills is bringing everybody out there to brainwash them to fly planes back into the country again. I love that we're going to do Skankfest, Afghanistan. Taliban rule. What if they turn all of these guys like Manchurian candidates when they all come back?

They're all just waiting to be activated. buddy what a great concept for a movie to get all the world's famous comedians to go over there and then they inject them with some horseshit and they come back here and they all try to kill trump right but like separate times separate times yeah they all they don't even know when they're happening they just get turned on yeah yeah yeah billy's doing his dude you know what dude when you're fucking driving down the five and uh dude i got to kill trump dude got to kill trump dude Dud, dead Dudd

Dudd Schultz goes I have to kill Trump Jessica Crescent goes I have to turn around And face the wall I don't know why

I gotta kill Trump I'm gonna let you kill Trump You're gonna get to kill Trump You're gay Stupid idiot You're the hell I hate you I can't believe I got out of my With my clitoris

Hey how are you Where you're from And then Bobby Lee's going to be slap and weaner all over the place. Yeah, no, but it doesn't affect Bobby Lee at all. He's so crazy, it does nothing to him. So much money. Yeah, it's a lot of money. Do you know in Dubai there's a diving building?

You start at the top floor and it's 200 feet and you just go down levels. It's like a sunken city. Oh. Dive Dubai building. It goes underground. It's built straight down, you're saying? It's built, yeah, it's built straight down, but it looks like a building underground

and you just keep going down, and that's it. It's the deepest inside dive that you can do. It's people, they use it to... Every floor is a... To practice deep water diving, like on wrecks and stuff like that. Interesting. Yeah, it's pretty crazy. That's in Saudi Arabia?

He just built it. No, that's Dubai. Oh, wow. They just built it. That's pretty cool. That's crazy. I still don't want to go. No.

How long have a flight's Dubai? Can you type in the coolest thing to do in Saudi Arabia, like cool things to do in Saudi Arabia? Maybe we entice Jay a little bit. Cool things to do in Saudi. On Travelocity? Is there anything on Travelocity? Dubai looks way cooler than Saudi Arabia. I don't go to Dubai either.

Dubai, I would love to go to Dubai. Dubai is also more modern. Yeah, Dubai, they just made. Yeah. Do you know they're making a city inside of, in the desert, okay? Burning Man. No. They're making a city.

a city like almost like a highway through the desert inside of itself. It's enclosed. It's enclosed. This thing right there, dude. This is happening.

Look at this. It's pretty wild. What's it called again? The line. The line. So literally, look, click on that one and the second one. Click on that, dude.

So they're making this city in the middle of the desert. The outside is going to be all glass. Inside is going to be all tropical and beautiful and self-sustaining and all the stuff like a whole life on mars yeah dude it's crazy what these guys are doing right through the middle of the desert just a line right through the middle of the desert and it's going to be people living inside there but it's going to be beautiful like tropical yeah people

yeah people are going to live in it look at it's crazy solar everything powered also it actually would make sense to use something like this as a model yeah the whole all the walls all the walls are going to be mirrors yeah mirrors that are going to solar panels that are going to charge the city and it goes from one side to the other and the high speed rails yeah from the from the ocean until the mountains and everybody lives inside of this thing weird yeah it's weird but these people are I mean that's like the that's like I mean you're

mushed in you mushed in but you're oh it's only 20 minutes across on the high on the high speed rail oh yeah it's not 20 minutes No carbon, though. That's important to desert people. But look inside of this fucking place. It's gorgeous. It reminds me of that movie Bruce Willis was in. What's that movie?

And we leave a light carbon footprint. What was that movie he was in? Who? Bruce Willis. Bruce Willis with the alien chick who sang with Pusifer. Oh. Fuck. Come on, Jay.

My stepmother's an alien? No, dude. Is Bruce Willis the chick? Remember Pusifer sang that song? and the girl was in it. She was in... Are you sure Pusufor is the right thing? The Pusufor's the right one, yeah.

The Mainer, the tool band. Yeah, Maineer's band. Yeah. She sang in it. Midnight and Switch Grass. What'd you say? The fifth element? The fifth element.

Remember the alien chick in that? Yes. She sang a song with Pusufor, one of my favorite songs, too. Really? Yeah, I forget the name of it. Because I'm not good with that. Miloiovovich? Yeah, Miloiovovich.

She's still pretty, too. Always had a beat. What was that song they sang, Pusufor and her? Right here, The Mission. The Mission, it's a great song. I don't know it. Dude, the mission, it's great song. The Fifth Element.

No, it's not from the Fifth Elements, it's from Pusufor. She's from the Fifth Element. But that city looks like... Oh, she just sings in the song. That city looks like the Fifth Element City. You know when they were flying around? Yeah. I mean, dude, it was a long way to go, and I took you on a road trip on that one, and you stay with me, and I appreciate it.

It was a journey. We're all over the place on that one. I was with you, though. I wanted to know what it was. Yeah. This song. You heard this song. Never heard it.

Weird. Yeah, it's a good song. I actually don't know a lot of puss for. Puss. Puss. Puss. Puss. Puss.

I get a lot of puss. You do. Puss. You get a lot of puss. Puss. Puss. You get a lot of puss if you will. Puss.

Puss. I keep searching to see if I'm going to find something that's like, oh, no, it's not illegal to be gay anymore. But everything I'm finding is just like, nope, punishable by death. Let me ask you question. When you go, if you get the hundred grand, the $100 grand, the line you in the suite, 101 grand. No, 1001,000. You want the thousand dollars? 100,000, sorry, 100,000 and one dollar. At least. 101 grand. Isn't that the way, can you say it that way too? No. That's, that's, that's, that's, that's funny when everybody goes, no. It's a thousand

too much. A hundred thousand and one dollars. Yes. And you get the suite over there on the flight. are you are you are you and you're going in you're going to do your show yeah it's two days okay four seasons oh nice say three days because you got to go to your orientation or what not to say oh right that's going to be four seasons do you take christine no uh why oh no i'll bring her i'm gonna be like as soon as we get them to be like hey let's try to have a good time this trip dyke alert Dyke alert You just call her a witch Dyke alert

Oh thank God That crazy lesbian was hanging all over me Oh you guys Thank God you guys killed that crazy lesbian You see she was about to bite me and make me a lesbian Just draw a picture of Abraham And stick it on her back And it's not flattering

Is it? Is it Allah? Who is it? Do they get mad at? I think you can't draw any of them You can't draw out of him. Muhammad. Is it Mohammed? No.

I think it's... Yeah, of course. If you draw Muhammad, you get killed, right? Didn't the guy, the cartoon guy, get killed because of that? Yes. I don't know. I mean, I just drew my hair. Well, they bombed the Charlie Hempdow.

Don't, don't draw him. You don't even know what he looks like. I do, I don't want to know. Dude, don't draw him. You're never going to... Please, don't do it. This is probably my 500th time. Guys, please, he's not...

There's zero time. Listen, guys, he is not drawing Muhammad. And he drew... Prophet Muhammad. That's not, that looks like Miss Piggy. Who does it look like? Let me see. You're out of your mind, Miss Piggy.

That looks like Steve Byrne. Oh, did you guys? Guys, I feel like this is going to surprise you. I feel like you're a little surprised by this. Yes. The Prophet Muhammad, a lot of people to know this, racist drawing of an Asian person. He's Andy Rooney as an Asian person. guy he's jerry lewis as an asian guy yes a lot of people are unaware of this but when those

guys would dress up and what you thought was a racist Asian character they were actually dressing up as the prophet Muhammad can we get christine one of these what is it called a burqa burkini get a bikini oh yeah i want to get christine the fucking the Nike one the Nike burqa we were at the water park up in uh lincoln new hampshire we go it's called wales tale it's old old school water park they have a bunch of rides they have the you know the cool they have the wave pool but it's not the biggest one but it's in the middle of the mountains so as you go up on the slides you're looking out at like the you know the the presidential range they call it it's just crazy it's a beautiful water park in the middle of this beautiful mountain range but we did see i feel bad for

muslim women because they're they're fine but they're in the pool dressed in these burkini from head to toe and you can see that like in the wave pool it was kind of fucking them up it's like they're going under they gotta wear this thing

it's hot out it's all black well Bobby there's only one solution yeah be born a man you dumb slut but it just it's like I wish they would

update the well Bobby what is she supposed to do she's supposed to show her shoulder and then I have to rape her I'm not Jay I'm not saying I understand what you're saying

you're coming from oh what happens Bobby she puts on like maybe a nice pair of jeans and then I'm forced to beat this shit out of and rape her listen you're right but I'm just think about her safety I'm trying you're right I'm sorry you don't you don't I'm not going to sit here and explain it to you I don't dude I don't and I apologize you understand she's a raging slut pig an insatiable whore bag for cock and if we don't keep her covered up but can you cover you understand I then I'm going to be four she's going to walk

in the room and then what am I going to do oh now all of a sudden I have to rape her right I Okay, so like, come on, think. You're right. When you're right, you're right? She's just head-gabbing. I didn't mean the yell. I just get very heated about this. I know, dude.

You're right. You're right. I was wrong. You want a girl to dress all trashy. I don't. And then I'm forced to beat and rape her. I know, dude. I mean, look, you live with a girl that dresses like the lead singer of Pearl Gym.

God damn right, dude. Oh, yeah. Fucking Steen Weiland. Look the Jewish girls have to her. Well, the Jewish girls have to wear what? They have to wear dresses. Like the Orthodox Jewish girls, like it's not even, because they can't wear pants. But they have to wear it.

So it's not even like a pants suit. They have to wear modest, like at least three-quarter-sleeved. But they could, but the Jewish girls updated their thing at least. I mean, the Burka. Well, this is orthodox. But the burqa is so. But the Jewish girls have to wear wigs. Oh, listen.

Orthodox is as retarded as all of it. But they did, they'll tell you what they did. The wigs look like you can't tell it's a wig. I can now. They don't wear wigs like the baddies, dude. The baddies go through a process. There's lace in the front. There's stuff holding it down, tape and glue, a whole way.

These chicks just flop a hair over their regular hair so their husband doesn't hit them. You know why? Because they don't have to worry about some other girl ripping it off their head in the fight. Okay, fair enough, fair enough. Fair enough. Some of them come out to fight in swim caps because they know they're going to lose that weave. It is a weird thing to see somebody in a pool in a full burqa and just, I would think that she's uncomfortable or maybe they just accept it. No point in time in no religion in any place, anywhere at all.

Would it make sense for you to swim in a fucking dress? No religion requires that. That is literally idiot guys putting a thing forward to be like, if anybody sees your kneecaps, they're going to rape you. So you have to protect you from that. Yeah, and the girls, I think, it's crazy. It's bad shit. It really is. It's really, like, I think it would be, I think it would be really uncomfortable to not wear that at the beach.

You know what I mean? Like, I think it's uncomfortable, I think it would be really uncomfortable for these girls to go out without their burqas. Well, let me tell you something. They're all, everybody's complaining about all the Muslims and all the stuff and that they're coming here. And once they're the majority in New York and the big cities. The moz jarred. They're going to, the moose jority. Hey, nice.

They're going to make Sharia law a thing. Sue nailed it. There wasn't even the word Sue in there. I just put Sue in front of the word nailed. Sue nailed it They're going to make Sharia law a thing And that means that women are going to have to obey their men Women are going to have to eat in a different section

Women are going to have to cover themselves up Women have to not talk You know what I mean I hope they're not talking because they're eating pussy Because they're going to get themselves killed again Sue wish Sorry guys Step back

Sue wish I'm going to All right you don't sue slam Allie soup dude if Sharia law was in place you know good that would be for a little while just to tell Don to

Hey listen Just just keep it down Yeah wouldn't you like to lash her a couple times Put this on Shut your face I want to give Christine a couple of lashes Well Christine would she would go down with the ship She wouldn't put it on

She wouldn't think so Christine if Sharia law was in Manhattan down and you had to wear a burqa from your car to here would you do it I mean you gotta survive but if that was happening I'd hope I'd go to a place where that wasn't the case anymore I can't imagine

that happened in New York City when I saw we had a lot of Muslim women in her building here and it would I hate how uncomfortable it would make me to see fucking chicks in New York City and burkas it's not working Jay she's still talking no Jesus Christ shit oh there's some punches in there hang on

shut the fuck up And some whip and some punch. I think you need rocks. You need some rocks. There you go. There's a rock. All right. She stopped.

Oh, shit. I think I went too hard. Christine. Christine. Ah, shit. Somebody help me throw in the car so we get dump her in front of an urgent care. Don would come back every day with a black eye.

What happened? I'm not fucking listening to those cock sack. I was getting a tomato and the fucking cock sock a bumped into me. Yeah. Christine, you'll fall right in line. Christine would love it. She'd have a Gucci burqa. I've been really, I've been batting around for the past couple years.

Christine? I've been battering around Christine. No, I've been really thinking about instituting Sharia law within the four walls of my home. I do believe your house is your castle and you can do whatever you like in there. What is, what is Sharia law? What are the first 10 things of Sharia law that we'd have to implement in our houses? Christine, what are the commandments? Yeah, what are the Sharia law?

Because I might do this too. Maybe we do, hey, what do we do this? Will you do a weekend of Sharia law in the household? I don't mind Sharia law in my house for one weekend. That sounds like a great idea. As an Armenian girl, I'm not allowed. To do what? To play Muslim.

As somebody who fucking lives in my home, you will fucking follow Sharia law. As an Armenian girl, I'm not allowed to follow Sharia law. You're not Armenian when you're at J's house. Christine, do you really write in the word commandments? Yeah. Why? I just want to see what came up. You knew it wasn't.

That was my joke. Okay, categories of actions. Here we go. Read them out. First one. Okay, these are, wait, this is Sharia law. Okay, obligatory things. Required actions.

Five daily prayers and fasting during Ramadan. It's fine. You should take the word commandments. This is not the right thing. Dude, that's fine, though. This is a bad. You're on Manjuro. You're fine.

I'm going to be on it soon. We're all good. Fasting's not going to be a problem. We're going to be so good. We're going to be so good. We're going to be shredded. You're going to do Majaro? I might.

Really? Well, here's the thing. I've been working out a lot. You only have to sled on half of a stomach now. You have to take so much less. I was thinking this, because I'm getting to the point, like, in the last month I fucking ate. Like, the last two and a half weeks when I was up there, I ate shitty a lot, and I put on some pounds again, and it fucking frightened me. Don't start this shit before Thursday.

You're going to eat Thursday. Don't start. Did you just tell me not to live? Do not think about living. living long before Thursday. Just eat healthy tomorrow, skip Thursday, eat healthy Friday. Yeah.

You guys are telling me not to... You're driving down with me to go get hundreds of dollars of disgusting foods. All right, I won't take... If I get Mujrano, Mujaro, Munguro. Manjaro? Manjaro. I think I was kicked in the head too much.

Kill a Mijaro. Dude, I got beat up too much when I was a kid. I was telling Don the day, I go, I think my brain. You can be retarded? I was knocked out a lot too much, I think, and my brain is fucking losing it. Okay, let's go.

Okay, these are... Let me read that thing. Let me read that thing. Sharia law. Yeah. To broad Islamic code encompassing religious rituals, ethics, broad. Broad. And legal matters such as family law,

business, and criminal law, guiding Muslims towards a divinely ordained path to God. Its rules derived from the Quran and sunnah, categorized actions is obligatory, recommended, permitted, or prohibited, with specific rules governing areas like prayer, fasting, marriage, and finance, while

some interpretations include severe punishment for crimes like theft or adultery. Boo. The overall intent of Sharia is to protect core values. Nice. Not those. Not those. And the welfare of human life. I mean, some of those.

Actually, two of those. Two of them actually are there? I think all three. You know what? I take it back. Legion of Skanks follows Sharia law? We had no idea. You have the same core values as Sharia law. Damn, damn.

I had no idea we've been strictly following Sharia law. If I would have prayed five times a day, I'd be a Muslim. Wow. Okay. Now go down to the thing you want me to read. That really breaks it down. The fact file? Give me to break down.

All right, here we go. It has four parts. Worship, commerce, crime, and punishment, marriage, and divorced. Banned behavior includes drinking, drugs, adultery, and they should be punished. Now, there's no way I'm going to go to Saudi Arabia and not smoke weed. You can't, you'd be killed.

For smoking weed? Yeah, for dying. But you can't do drugs. Yeah, I won't go then. I mean, I don't know how half of those people are going. Can I smoke cigarettes there? Yes. Okay.

Yes, you can probably opium. Yeah, you can do drugs, their drugs, not your drugs. Oh, I'll do opium. Yeah. If I could go, I mean, I'm sober. Actually, tomorrow. Is your first day back on the junk? Tomorrow I'm doing junk

Tomorrow's 40 years sober Oh really? Yeah Oh that's awesome dude Let's break it on Thursday Dude we're gonna break it tomorrow Ooh should we bring you drugs What was your drug of choice

Ah alcohol Alcohol alcohol What kind of alcohol I would say alcohol and then pills Any pill I would just take a pill And kisses from adult man No that was my That was not my drug of choice

That was the way I got the pills And the alcohol You can get Imprisonment at one to six months months for first time if a drug dealing two to ten years in prison that's not that crazy well that's for marijuana would be nice that was that for Saudi Arabia so it's marijuana only yeah you think they're gonna have a problem my Jeter's but there's something about foreigners go back up over foreigners uh foreign nationals caught using

cannabis may also face deportation addition other penalties oh that's fine bye later motherfuckers do you what about that basketball player that got arrested in Russia Brittany Griner yeah who actually did you hear about that i don't know if it's true she was a spy the whole time no i think she was they cut her clit off no is she is she a a guy yeah no they all just seem like they are no no no she seems like a guy well they said in russia they put they didn't put her in the women prison what really yeah why because of her penis a lot of people say she's aaron gordon in a wig that could be some bullshit on the internet but I read I was reading an article where it said

in Russia they did not put her in a female prison they put her in a male prison so because Russia doesn't give a fuck about you know I'm a woman well all right well fuck off that thing down there says you're a dude yeah yeah you're not your thick penis and balls say otherwise am I right do you read it the thick penis and ball says otherwise yeah yeah don't worry Oh, God, I'm so glad to be back with you. You fucking make me giggle, brother. Go back to the other things we can find out are illegal. Now, Christine, sorry, I'm sorry.

I'm getting shrieed up. Buddy. Sorry, I'm getting shrieed up and screaming out. I think you're allowed to beat me with, like, a small stick. Ooh, I'll get you the stick. Thank you. I'm going to do a back scratcher. And not the face.

Christine? You want to show me what's what, but not really farmed. You got me a dope-ass switchblade, and Christine just took it and lost it. What? I have no idea where it is. and I've probably gone through planes with it. The knife I gave you? Yeah.

Yeah, I'll get you nothing. It's fucking so awesome. Christine took it home for me. Where is the knife? Can I tell you why? It's a perfect house knife. Yes. Because every packages, stuff around the house.

I'll get you another one. I'll get you another one ASAP. I'll check my purses. I have something else I'm getting you too. Okay, for adultery, you can get lashes or a stoning. Ooh, I would definitely have some lashes. But what if you guys invite a girl back? Isn't that adult?

Can you, at the end of it go? you did adultery bitch and slapsed her and then lash her oh wait I wouldn't get lashed for adultery no she does men don't get lashed for nothing oh my adultery is undisciplined at all no you can have as many wives as you want now am I able to hit my significant other because I cheat and like you made me cheat and then give her some lash I think so this place actually I would have went for less that's just in you that's just who you are uh sharia law permits behavior You're banned by English law, for example, polygamy. Now, this place is actually starting to light me up a little bit.

Do you see what I'm saying? Yeah. Like, I'm saying, in my brain, I'm like, okay, I went through all these things. I'm like, it doesn't sound that bad. All you have to do is the praying five times a day and fasting on Ramadan, maybe a little tough. But to keep, you know, Don and Christine in check a little bit, right? You wish. You wish we had Sharia law.

It's fucking great for dudes. You're lucky we don't right now the way you're talking to me. Bobby, you want a lasher? I don't want to lash you, but I'd like to see you lasher. Take a little lash, Christine. You can be a small stick. Hit her again. Chrising lash, take the fucking lash.

Lash, lash. Lash. I wonder if they sell, they must sell lashing sticks, wife lashing sticks. Christine, could you order your own lashing stick, please? I bet you they do sell lashing sticks to hit your wife. Oh, dude, that's like when the black kids would have to go pick their switch. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you have to get your lash. Get your lasher.

Saudi Arabia, Amazon, just type in women lashing stick. I love it. I want one if they sell it. Yo, it sounds like this place rules. I'm going to hang it on each room in my house. Anytime Dawn gets out of line, I'm just going to grab the lashing stick off the wall. All right.

It's time for me to go get out of here and cry at nine-ish nails. I got to go do... I'm worried it's going to get me tonight. Really? It didn't get me the first time I saw it. I'm worried about tonight. Johnny Cash hurt gets me. This one hurts more, I feel like.

I think so. The nails one? To me, it does. Johnny Cash singing it was great. It's great. Because it's so him. It is, but the original, it's just so eerie.

Remember they started crying at the festival? Well, they were on mushrooms. It was the funniest thing in the world. We brought it. Isabelle was the reason why I didn't. Isabel's going to be there tonight too, but I might dip out to get a little bit away from everybody for this one. But Isabella was with her,

and it was also a frustrating, like, tough day that day to get to panorama that day. I was on the road that morning. I came home, We went, and when they came out, Dan and Lewis took mushrooms, and I was like, I'm not going to take mushrooms. Isabella's here. She was, like, 16 maybe. Yeah.

Or something. I was like, I'm not taking him with Isabella here. They were like, all right. And then when they started playing hurt, at one point, I just looked back, and Dan and Lewis were both just like, no. Yeah, fall in the pieces. I'm not going to fall into pieces. And R.E. too. I'm not going to fall to pieces.

And they have face painted. I'm not going to fall of pieces. I'm just where I'm going to get this, this right here, this one. the movie tier the movie star tier I know we have to do addreys and you have that eye liner on so the black will come down

Robert Kelly is going to be on the road we'll be back tomorrow who gives a fuck until tomorrow everybody crackle crackle