The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - The Bonfire at Skankfest Vegas

Episode Date: October 13, 2023

Skankfest returns to Las Vegas along with the Bonfire- live before a frenzied audience! Jay and Bob discover a sexy secret about Joe DeRosa and then a phantom appears onstage!

I'm Bobby Kelly and it's Big J. Ocasin. We're actually a full radio show on Series XM, not just a podcast. For full episodes of the Bonfire, you can listen on the Series XM app. Go to seriesexm.com slash Bonfire for a special offer. And now, live from Skankfest Vegas, it's the Bonfire with Big Jail Crescent and Robert Kelly. I'm going to play a little bit more. I'm going to play a little bit more. I'm going to play a little bit more. I'm going to play a little bit more. I'm going to play a little bit more. I'm going to play a little bit more.

I'm going to play a little bit more. I'm going to play a little bit more. I'm going to play a little bit more. I'm going to play a little bit more. I'm going to play a little bit more. I'm going to play a little bit more. I'm going to play a little bit more. I'm going to play a little bit more. Oh I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go.

I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. We're going to take our Pocka books off. We are really old men. Everybody, what is up? welcome to the bonfire live? From Skankfest I am Big J. Augustin in his first live bonfire show everybody it is the hilarious the legends rubber Kelly I'm fucking honored to be in front of this fan base. Not Dan loves you.

Big J. Ocasin everybody. The fucking man. You know, I'm white clawed drunk, dude. I'm gonna suck cock. Derosa. Oh, wait, wait, stop. Is this the first time you're ever gonna stand during a set? Yeah. I mean, I'm gonna look the fuck up. I don't know why it feels weird to sit in chairs, though. Yeah, but it feels weird to stand with you. It's like Bill Cosbyish. People. Joe DeRose, our good friend,

Jack Dolf, a trans person earlier. Wait a minute. That's her right there. Bobby, do you answer your next question? I think that's the story. I think that's the story. That's her right there. Cheers. Bobby, do you answer your next question? Starting linebacker for her college, I spoke football. For college football team.

Let me tell you something. I don't... I don't fucking blame him. No one blames him. She is. It was a... Joe's unlocked something new, everybody. Like it's a, he's in a whole new world, but Nicole,

he took to it like fish to water, right? Nicole, let me ask you a question. Did he grab your balls and jerk off? He did, he did balls and penis. And he came. And he came. And he came. And he came. Nicole, is it fun to hook up with a guy that you can hold upside down in 69?

Oh yeah, a whole minute. Let me ask a question, whose penis was bigger? Yours or his? Oh, dude. She's got eight inch. That sucks. She has an eight inch thick dick. What nationality are you?

Italian or Romanian? You're Italian and Romanian? Wow. Oh my god. Is it cut or uncut? I don't know the terms. I'm cut. You're uncur easy for your part. Nice, proper, thick.

You got a nice helmet. Makes a little sound when you pop it up. What is this soul bonding you guys are doing? That was crazy. That was two hearts beating as one right there. Why don't you stop being a cock blocker and mind are doing. That was crazy. That was too hard to beating his one right there. Why don't you stop being a cock blocker and mind your business. Oh, sorry. Look at me.

You guys go back to making the... I'm so dry. Was he? Was he? You got to be honest right now. I know he jerked you off, but did he put it in his mouth a little bit? He did not. Look at me.

Look at me. She's lying. Look at my child. You're lying. She hasn't tell. Look the way. This is what she did. She meant he did not.

I saw it. Oh my God. How did he get it wet? He didn't put in his mouth, but he was kissing my neck and trying to kiss me. He funny. What? That's gayer than blowing you. Oh, yeah. I didn't tell in his mouth, but he was kissing my neck and trying to kiss me. He fucking what? That's gayer than blowing you. Oh yeah, I didn't tell you that part. But he also has intense makeup, I'll say.

Oh fuck it yet! Wow, he kissed you, now is his soft. When you went like this to him and your hands slid off his shoulders, did that bother you? No. He was hard. Damn dude. I kissed you. No, he was he was hard Damn, dude I kissed Joe the road, so you just gotten the cold Jay he kissed her neck Yeah, man, no

Joe came back and I'll tell you what that I've never seen the guy loose is a goose His arm was over the side of his chair. He was just like guys Life's pretty much cream cheese at this point. Yeah, cream cheese on his face. Goddamn right. I'll tell you what though, I understand his excitement at like, he just opened himself to a whole new world of pornography. You think he opened himself up today to that?

You think the pornography's been there? You don't think if you type in Sheridan Hotel on a Google search on his, that just, she mail pops up. But Nicole said though, Joe took to it like when you throw a baby in water and they just know how to swim. Was it a good hand job?

It was all right. It was all right? Did you give him any tips? No. No tips? Would you do it again? That's my question. Would you hook up with him again?

Yeah? Oh, wow. Oh, my God. That's socks. That was a maybe. That was sock if you got... That wasn't a maybe at all, dude. Joe's gonna be full blown butt-fucked by the end of this weekend.

Yeah. Him and Norton are gonna have a show. Two girls and two girls. It's called Tuck-Fuck. I'm not gonna have a show. Two girls and two girls. Is she here? Is Christine here? I always like to fucking the queen around the fucking big boss bitch or one of here comes the general here the general. Yes, she is one of the three headed monster of skankfest everybody you know where you love her the queen of the bonfire everyone is Christine Evans There she is She is a fucking amazing producer a shitty actress

Yeah, yes terrible. She hasn't she's been here. She didn't hear the episode. We really Attacked How horrible you were at acting. Yeah, look in your phone and pretend something's happening. He's so good at Shakespeare. But good news, the whole audience is gonna hear the fruits of the acting today. We suck in context.

You're gonna hit the bottom. It's coming out next week. We're talking about something you haven't heard yet. We really suck at this. Well, of course we have a little show we're putting on here and you're gonna see Christine's acting chops. Oh, no, no, no, no, girls stop. Stop. You're not even gonna back her up even though you both have vaginas. Yeah, this is like when you all got behind Casey Anthony first. You know what I mean?

You're jumping the gun. You got to hear the B-roll of this. It was bad, but I love you though, but you were really bad at that back there. Yeah, you upset little Jacob so much. There's probably a reason why I'm not an actress. But you said you were, let's not do this in front of people. In high school. In high school. I acted in high school in junior college. You were going to be in New York to be part of the big theater. And then I didn't.

Yeah, we know why you did. Now I do this. Yeah, I bet. To be or not to be, that's the question. I mean, the transsexual acted better with Joe DeRosa in the back. She was able to make Joe feel like he had a big enough dick that he would come quick. Exactly.

I can't believe Joe did that in the bathroom at Skankfest. Right there with Nicole. Nicole, can you do me a favor and Nicole? Just go, come here, come here, come here, come here, come here. Just go, mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Oh my God. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Oh my God. Oh my God.

Oh my God. Mm-hmm. Right out of the gate. Amazing. Yeah. My dick got hard. You know, for 15 straight minutes, we couldn't get Christine to do that.

Oh my God. Jesus Christ. Oh my God. God damn that was bad. We also, we should introduce ladies and gentlemen, give it up for the amazing Jacob Patat everybody, give it up for him. There he is. Look at those arms.

Look at that body. Look how sexy he is. You should just sick body Jacob. Oh my God, You have a sick body Yeah, your body's man toy pull up pull up you let me let's see your abs Jacob. Come on. I can't do it Come on You have the best body here by no Yeah, there's nobody here with abs. This is gonna sound arrogant but by Jacob standards

I'm not ready to do that right now. Damn. Wow. Suck on that, you fat fox. He's embarrassed to show his shit. Damn. That makes everybody upset. Show your shit.

I can't believe fucking Joe. Uh. Oh God bless him. It's not gay sex he had, but it's like a Jason. Ha ha ha ha! He's side-queer. Yeah, for sure. Like, Joe's earned his way onto a float in a parade. That's for sure.

Yeah. He doesn't have to wear fucking nipple tassels and dance, but like, he could be like throwing beads or some shit. No, I dabble. I dabble. I dabble Everybody have a big round of applause for Black Lou who couldn't be here with us today He's having total FOMO But of course everybody you know the life's blood the heartbeat of the bonfire is in the motherfucking house everybody Why don't we make some noise for DJ? Loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo What child is it? D.J. Blue.

Yes! You just been looted. He just got looted. And everybody, you know him and you fucking love him hanging out with us here at Skankfest. And OG member of the Bond Fire, how about it? From Merc Face Andy, Andy Fiori. Cheers. He's not that guy no more.

There's so much weird feedback. I don't know what I'm doing. It's from all your bracelets. I don't know if it is. You see this guy's got some intense ass earrings over there. Are you the guy who does branding? Oh yeah, I remember this guy. He does branding.

He'll burn something into you. Oh, no, I thought like influencer branding. No, no, no, no. Like hot, hot, hot iron branding. Oh, no, I thought like influencer branding. No, no, no, no. It's hot. Hot, hot iron branding. Oh, no shit. Yeah. In case you're too much of a pussy to get a tattoo.

Can you do one? Can you put a cue on Joe DeRose's bum? Can we sneak up on him with it? Let's just zap him. Old West style. You would never do it. You have a friend? No, no. I definitely hook up with her, but I would definitely, oh, she's hot.

I would never get branded. No, I know. I'm too much of a fucking pussy. Well, dude, great news. If you go blow the Rosa, it's like you and the coal made out sorry that's my midday math by my math it would say Bobby you say this is your first live show with the bonfire yeah I was I couldn't wait I was I've seen it last year and it's such a fun thing and uh...

I was very... I was kind of nervous. Yeah, I know. You're so worried that the audience doesn't fucking like you. They love you Bobby Kelly. You came in and saved the bonfire dude and wouldn't have happened. Yeah. Hang on. Real quick. I never felt that they didn't like, but now I do. I mean, what the fuck? Oh, I was sure that you thought they didn't like you. No, I didn't. Oh, you weren't walking around, I think they didn't like you.

No, I've never said that, I thought that, ever. I thought the consensus was they didn't like you, but I was trying to get you to rise up above that. I was like, dude, don't listen to those most of the people. I don't know what the fuck type of human being you are, but you went yesterday, you stood all fucking day long. Until like, and you were like, we're going to a strip, we're watching the band and we're going to a strip club. Dude, I couldn't do it. I quit. Yeah, you quit. You came over and gave me cheek kisses means it's a rap. Bobby's saying an unadiping no where I love you. Love you buddy. Like this is it, isn't it? Did you go to the strip

club? Yeah, that was yesterday we had that was the Legion of Skanks one. How was it? Shit, dude? strip-o-licious I don't know. It's not really my thing The what the fuck did you go? The Legion of Skanks part we had to be there to say did you see titties? I Don't think maybe I Mean we really had like we talked in like a booth, a bunch

of comics and I was like, yo we should smoke weed and then I never came back inside. I got a new one and I had a two die for tuna melt from his haggin'aws in the circus. Oh, that's a good tuna melt over there. It's insane. Yeah, but it's also insane because it's four in the morning. It's it for the morning and when you think there's enough mayo on the sandwich, that's when they start putting on mayo. It's a fucking good sandwich. Oh, Christina did upside down last night. Oh shit. What? What? You know what I just said the funniest thing I've ever said in my entire life. This was it.

What? You just bought your guys 10 more years of me because it all led to that moment. What? It's too late now. Moments gone, bro. But it was. You guys would have been like, what? That made me think.

It made me feel. I'm having a blood. You what? But it was you guys would have been like what that made me think it made me feel I'm having a butt you what what are you fucking dying right now? No, don't have a stroke. I have too many my friends had a stroke. What oh shit. No, that would suck if I had to do the show with you Welcome to the bar by everybody I'm Buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh- Dude, there's no fucking music playing. It's me. No, you it's not It's me you friend. It's not happening now for sure. There's no fucking mute. Are you all right there? How many tuna melts did you have one and only half of one last night split with Christine? Will you mad that you had a split it? Yes

Yes, Bobby. I was so mad She said turkey and cheese so I to have a half of that bull shit. Are you on a split? I hate splitting. I love splitting unless the thing I picked is better. Then the split sucks dick. I didn't want fish, bitch. That's why I didn't order fish. I got this delicious burger you know on half of

Now all right what what the Dude you are right tonight is you hear it? Do you stop I'm serious are you fucking with I feel like this is already again? Are you guys hearing some shit? Did you hear music Dude are you look at me look at me. Are you alright there? Did you fucking get did someone dope you up again? I've only smoked stuff, but I don't think so Dude, there's no music are you fucking crazy? All right, let's move on I don't want to freak anybody out.

Jesus Christ. You're freaking everybody out. You go, the show's definitely over. You didn't replace you with Justin. I love Justin. Where is he? Wasn't that make sure he's not here so he doesn't hang himself from that comment?

Ha ha ha. The guy just, we just walked the guy. Jacob, you heard no music. I didn't hear anything. No. Nobody heard music, Jacob. Oh, I'm willing to move on. Let's move on.

But that's weird. Oh, maybe my phone is my phone playing music. Fucking Christ. You're a professional broadcaster. You left your phone on. it on no wow that's not music put that back in your bucket I'm fucking I'm I'm 100% I'm really nervous right now I don't know what the fuck's happened this guy's hearing songs in his head. No, no, no, no, no. You guys talk here music. No. There's no fucking music, though.

You're fucking around. There's no music. In the land, sleep in the evil space, You hope and love your mind, Let your fantasy's on white, And this promise that you know You cannot find All the self-whimsical and wise I'm a little bit of a sub-a. I'm a little bit of a sub-a.

I'm a little bit of a sub-a. I'm a little bit of a sub-a. Oh The trouble take you where you The dance Wait dance on her Back Hey good job Jacob. I don't know what doesn't work. That's your message for sure Wait, dance on her! I'm back! Hi, Joe. Hey, good job, Jacob. I'm the one who doesn't work. That was a message for sure.

That worked. Hey, what's up, everybody? Woo! Woo! Woo! I'm asking, sweaty as shit. Yeah? Yeah.

Did you get that cape from Joe DeRosa? Yeah, to suck off cover. Where is she? Where's the lucky lady? She's right there. Nice. Yeah, did you get that cape from Joe De Rosa? Yeah, it's a suck off cover Where is she? Where's the lucky lady? She's right there nice. Did he come quick? Two minutes, was it a lot? That's all the wrong answers. I know I was hoping he was gonna be pumping out comment apologizing at the same time It's like I'm sorry. Then she backed him down to the bucket and dunked on his ass. Dude, I love it.

Yeah, get fucking under the hoop. Yeah, look how small Taroza's dick would look in her hands. Please Nicole, hold up your hands. Did I hear you played ball? No, I... She'd be like, ask more of football. Neither?

Oh, okay. I was just trying to line them up in an Oklahoma drill. I thought we should do that. Put the ball on someone's chest to see who gets hit. Did you play sports as a young girl? Volleyball. Oh, god. I'm just spiking on those hos, huh?

When Joe started jerking you off, you didn't ask, he just started doing it, right? Oh, yeah. He was grabbing it. He was just, he was just curious and grabbing it. Yeah, he was kissing my neck, grabbing my tits. What a sensual lover. Did you know Joe was that sensual?

He's very sensual. What's he doing? I'm feeling he was a gentle boy in the sack. He was. Did he kiss on the lips a little bit? A little. Oh, wow. Did he say and stuff like we shouldn't be doing this.

His breath smelt like salami. Yeah. You know why? It is a really good sandwich. That's it. That's it. That's the best commercial for Joey Roses. Yeah.

A and B. Come get us. Come get us sandwich for the dude smell. It's salami. Always be advertising. You'll come in two seconds if I can help it. I love that he's just at a random bar in a casino right now. Are you guys going to hook up again?

Is it going to happen again? It's not a no. Oh, maybe. Is that from you? Yeah, I think he's down. Yeah. You think he's down? Oh, yeah. The guy came in two minutes. Guy busted a nut in two minutes. He's ready

for a fucking sequel. Yeah. Can we get him higher? Like working in this feedback is crazy. Hey the powers coming back to me. Oh, there it is. Jacob, come get this robot cock. Look at Jacob's little tiny push. Yeah, dude. Oh, you see him give that little fucking rank where jeans commercial pull up at the end?

Oh, this old fucking ranch hand? I don't know. Jacob, come up here and do that for the crowd. Show them what you're working on. Come up here and pull it up. Get up here. Turn around and pull it up. Pull them up.

Right here. Woo! Woo! Woo! Oh, my. Bang-a-ah. Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Oh! Oh, I can just see my legs wide apart while I pull his ass into me. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha- You know, probably more than anything. Jacob is probably what you miss more than anything. He's got to be.

Not to you, don't. Oh, I mean, I wasn't fishing for a compliment, but that was the right answer. I feel like it came back to get my stuff out of the attic and you're like, do you miss me? And you're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, let me go grab my boxes real quick. You guys, you want to like meet up with a Dave and Busters or something at some point? We're going to do the parking lot at work. It's not a big deal.

I, uh, well, Dan, we've been laughing too much together because I'm with Bobby now. Yeah. It's all good. This has been fun. It's been fun talking to you, but... What does Bobby do when you say my name and you're sleep? I go like this I go God, I know you guys are eating sandwiches that one ended meet each other in the middle No, dude, not in the middle not in the middle

I can only eat a little bit I actually took them to lunch yesterday in a Hawaiian place and I took two bites and I fucking dumped You're the shit no I threw that's what it's called this guy doesn't know you now you have no Bond-fire context. Yeah, we know about fire context Bobby. I got Me yeah, what time line is it Bobby? Whatever dude Terminator timelines I didn't even know no you know you know speak it fluently you poser no But the fact that he didn't say it fast made me think when you try to get your dog to give you Paul in front of people

No, he does that he kills the home come on Paul come on, Bobby, you know the term there is time line thing. Have you talked, have you talked about Jay's stamina of hanging out at night? I tried to bring it up, but then he started hearing music and I thought he was fucking losing his mind. Yeah, last night, me and Dan, can I, can we be honest with you? We're gonna go higher to the Thai restaurant. Jay wanted us to go to the strip club, you know, Jay has stand, it's crazy. He'll go all fucking day all night and he was like, he was like, we're going to the strip club. We're gonna see the band, all the shit, me and Dan and he was like, we're going to the strip club, we've got to see the band, all the shit, me and Daniel

like, all right, we're going. And me and Dan went and got Thai food and came up with a plan to go to you and get out of going to the strip club. I honestly, at one point, there was such a conspiracy. Well, we didn't want to hurt your feelings. At one point, we came up with the idea of telling Jay, we were gay and have been gay for 10 years

And that we've been fucking for a while Yeah, and now is the best time Yeah, because Bobby's ovulating Jay we're gonna make a baby. We're gonna do it here this weekend Bobby can finally be a top. Yeah, this is a little power bottom, dude. Just scooping your boss and come out of my butt. Yeah. Ha, ha, ha. Let's try to gross them out.

That's it. I'll hold on. Yeah, you know, Dan, we did the show for eight fucking strong years together, man. That's right. Never a bad year. And I would have came back if the election wasn't stolen from Trump and everyone else had.

But me and Bobby now have carved out our own thing, but that said I've known Bobby longer technically. Yeah. Yeah, but not like carnal knowledge like we have of each other. Sure. We have maybe a stronger lustful knowledge. Yeah, but Bobby's knowledge is deep. I have a family bond. Like I knew him when he was little,

little, little, uh, R&B, Jay. Dude, that is, that's a bad boys, bad boys at comedy. Roll the pant leg. Yeah. We just want you to do that. Well, all my sweats, dog. I'm just, I'm trying to point out things I know about Jay in front of Bobby now.

I go, well, you still do that. Bobby? Bobby? Bobby hasn't seen sweatpants season yet. Oh, dude, get ready. You're gonna try to pull his leg down and he's gonna get mad when you do it. You're gonna be in the elevator, you go, just see what that feels like.

Jay used to open for me. Yeah. Bobby already knew that stuff. I open for both of you guys, so fuck off. It's just... You open for both of us and then left us both behind. Literally, what are you guys doing the thing together? You guys, you guys kids, I'm gonna go take it out.

You really just, hey, you guys, you guys, you guys just like, I'm done with this, if you guys wanna play with it. Hey, you hooked up to your exes to fuck around. You got, you got, you really got to go on with them, good one call. I don't know, I mean, to figure out who to fuck around. You really get along with her, get him a call. I don't know. I mean, to figure out who knows me better. I absolutely know you better. I fucking know you better.

You know what's funny is Ralph has been trying to steal this concept for six months on SDR. Knowing we were going to do this at the end. Listen, I know you 100. I've known you longer, I know you deeper. He plays a character around you, don't you see it? What? I know the real Jay.

Guys, guys, don't fight over. Stop. I bet you've never spitting his mouth before a show. Yes, I bet you never sucked them off before a show. Dude, call me fucking whatever this lady's name is. Nicole. Nicole, I was, I was lurking in the shadows. If I was gonna give her nickname, it would be Joe's whole Nicole.

That's fine. Will you tell us if you hook up with them again? If we, all right, go get it. Or Joe's pole Nicole. Joe's pole Nicole. We'll get you all back in there somehow. Joe's pole Nicole. Joe's pole Nicole. We'll get you all back in there. We can't. Joe's pole Nicole.

Joe's pole Nicole. That's a good chance. Joe's pole Nicole. It didn't take. Joe starts running in here like it's just calling. What? Guys, I think there's only one way to find out who knows J-Bests, the way the bonfire gets down. With the Las Vegas style, live bonfire, game show.

We're going to take quick commercial break and when we come back, everybody, it's going to be Lou. Knows J. Best. Lou's Flash, what's Who's last was me? Who's mine? It's not from Skank, that's everybody. Who's last was me? Who's mine? It's not from Skank, that's everybody.

Live from Skank Fest Vegas, back to the bonfire with Big J Alkerson and Robert Kelly. And now, from world famous Fremont Street in Las Vegas, Nevada, where men and business suits used to drive their Cadillacts, now it's fat families on ziplines. Where Don Rikkels and Jerry Lewis lit up the night. Now we have Rich Voss and Lewis J. Gomez performing in an old movie theater, where there were once beautiful burlesque shows. Now these whores are just dancing in circles on the street. Where the rat pack once roamed, now it's actual rats.

It's time for Who Knows J Best. And here's your host, Jake Botox. Stop it, stop it, stop it. Good evening and welcome to the Bonfire in Las Vegas! I'm your host, Jake Batad, and tonight we're gonna find out who knows Jay Best. Now we have two contestants for over eight years. The other was a comedy mentor to Jay for way longer than that. But which one of them knows him best? Can this Den from Nugget mine the gold that he needs to win this game? World champs.

Or will this Boston Celtic have the luck of the Irish on his side? It's time we find out on Who Knows J.Bass! Are you ready? I said, are you ready? Let's play! I love the talk to the church of the jeans. Let's play! I love the tucked-in shirt to the jeans. Thank you. Thank you, Dan.

All right, but before we start the game, let's hear from our first sponsor of the day, Lewis Johnson! Take it away! This episode of Who Knows J Best is brought to you by Big Jim's Context app. Do you watch TV on an all audio medium? Do you assume everyone knows exactly who and what you're talking about at all times? What? What is that even? You need the context app from Big Jim! The context app will alert you if you forget the listening

audience can't see what you're seeing. It will beep when last month's reference is talked about like it's common knowledge. Big Jim's context app. When you're not as good as you thought you were, at radio. Thank you, Lewis. Let's meet our contestants. Ladies and gentlemen, give a warm round of applause for our first contestant. He's Dan Soder! Welcome, Dan. Welcome to Who Knows J-Best. Thanks, dude.

Now, Soder, I'm told that's a Swedish last name. It is. Fascinating. Okay, well, it says here you're a comedian, you hail from Colorado, you were raised by a. And that you became a lifelong San Francisco 49ers fan after your dad died of alcoholism. Tell us about that then. About the Niners or Sarosis. Your dad. He died 48, which is pretty impressive of alcoholism. All right.

Well, the Swedes do like their drink. Good luck to you, Dan. Now, ladies and gentlemen, give it up for our next contest and he's Robert Kelly. Robert, welcome to Who Knows J Best. Now, Robert, it says here Knows J Best. Now, Robert, it says here you're a comedian. I sure. Well, now, as my sweet old mom would say, it looks like we got ourselves a couple of comedians here.

All right, very good. All right. It says, What the fuck is happening? Robert, you're seeing Jacob's other state. What the fuck is going on? He becomes it, Bobby. This is the awesome set live shows. This is the greatest thing I've ever seen.

Now Bobby, it says here you're from Baston, Massachusetts. You were the instigator on Dane Cook's Torgasm. Well, I mean, yeah, I was a fucking asshole in that show. Ellen, by the way, congratulations to Dane Cook on his nup shools to his child bride. Well, do your math, the math doesn't matter. It's ruined on my son. All right, Robert. It says here, you're married to your sweetheart, Don.

You have a 10-year-old son, Max. And you had most of your stomach removed because you couldn't control your eating. Tell us about that, Robert. I mean, I do have addictions. That kind of hurts. Yeah, I had most of my 70% of my stomach removed your cock's eye.

Well, gluttony is one of the seven deadly sins. Good luck to you, Robert. Yeah. Yeah. Now, I'm not gonna... Yeah. Ladies and gentlemen. You see, I'm a whole different thing.

Dude, live Jake, I'm strong, fuck Ladies and gentlemen... Dude, live Jacobs Ross fuck! Ladies and gentlemen, I'm not gonna say too much about this man here because hey, these guys are supposed to be the experts, but I will give you some general background information, and I think the casual Big J. Oakerson fan would know. Jay, it says here that you're a New York comic who hails from Philadelphia, PA. You specialize in crowd work comedy. You claim to have a girlfriend producer who snorke can wake the dead and Apparently you're the only celebrity immune to the drug ozampic Welcome Jay give him a round of applause everybody

I beat it it didn't beat me The same thing happened at Derosa. I got to give it to you on that one. Now, Jay, crowd work comedy, fascinating. Let's roll, Pillay. If I'm at one of your shows with one of my piled-out girlfriends, what might you say to us? Oh, I don't know. One of your piled-out girlfriends, you know, ask her what a lot of pressure.

Ask her what she's on. Probably ask her about Black Dick. Excellent. Well, good luck to our two contestants. It's time to play Who knows J. Best. But first, let's hear from another one of our sponsors, Louis Johnson! This portion of Who Knows J Best is brought to you by Christine Evans, Bed Corner Buddy. Take it from me, ladies. The way to a man's heart and libido is cleanliness. As your boyfriend's gaze, going from love rockets to dead sockets, crisp corners in the day become ruffle cheats at night. Mm.

Christine Evans' bed corner bite. When your boyfriend wants his bed made, like mommy used to make it. Hot. Hot. Yo. Yo. We had to shorten the phrase, mm-hmm. Because she couldn't get it. It was bat shit.

That was the hundredth take of, right, this is just. Were you in the studio giving her the Ike Turner? No. I was not going to have the song go. I know how the skit goes. Jay, I wrote the damn song. For eight minutes, I wasn't paying attention until I realized it's been eight minutes to

get this sentence. And I'm like, what's happening? And then I watched her crumble the pieces in front of... She goes, Jacob, you say it. It wouldn't even have made sense. No it would not. Jacob was, he was like the guy from Whiplash. Whiplash dude you say. And my coming or going slap.

I deleted and wrote mmm and wrote mm-hmm. She couldn't get to make things easier. Mm-hmm. Wasn't a 11 minute adventure. Jesus. She moved to New York to do Broadway. Anyway, you've all heard about 25 takes just edited together right there. Yes. We have a variety of questions for you here today. just edited together right there.

We have a variety of questions for you here today. Each correct answer will be worth one point along with a bonus round question worth five points. Now, we begin with question number one, and this is for both of you. Robert Daniel, big J. Ockerson is in a hotel room. He has some downtime. He lays on his bed, knees a Kimbo. What does he type into his laptop search bar? I'll give you a few seconds.

Dan Soder, your guest will begin with you. Jay Types into his search bar. Blond woman, five black men. Gang bang. Robert Kelly, five black men. Gang bang. Robert Kelly, your answer please. Jay types into his search bar. Shane Gillis' net worth. And then what Dan said.

Big Jay Ocasin. Who knew J. Best? Damn, it was closer on this one, but I'm gonna do that. I'm gonna do it, Bobby said. Before I whack off now, I'm gonna find out Shane's network. Don't do it. Don't do it. No, no, no. Don't do yours and then his. No, no, no, I'm gonna do both. And then I'm gonna use my own tears as Lou. Jay, do it and then leave it up in the corner

while you watch the porn jerking off. Do you know what it is? Two mil. That's not even true. No. It's way less. It's so much more than that. I got finessed by an old lady.

Dude, mine's 300k. That's pretty good. What? Sorry, high fluten Bobby. All right, well, then round one goes to Dan Soder and ladies and gentlemen, please. They don't have to be bonds not my jam. Just White woman five black. It doesn't matter the color of hair. Understood. black. It doesn't matter the color of hair. Understood. Ladies and gentlemen, please give it up for our scorekeeper for the evening, Mr. Andy Fiori. It is one to nothing, Dan. Thank you, Andrew. Good heart.

All right. It's one to nothing, Dan. Moving on to our next question, and this one is an individual question for Robert Kelly. Robert, Big J. Ocarson and your wife Don are in a car together. On a cold winter night, the car breaks down. They are hours from help and the heat is broken. In multiple choice, would Big J. Okerson A. roll down the window and smoke a cigarette? B. suggests they cuddle to conserve body heat. Or C. Light a joint, get on high and then put her hand on his already engorge penis. All three.

But the order is put his hand on his engorge penis, smoke a cigarette, and then cuddle for heat. That's what I think they would do. Yeah. Big J. Ocusen was Robert Kelly right? To the T. A point for Robert Kelly everybody. That just felt like D, all of the above, which... It's not a real answer.

It's getting chippy. Whatever, Dan. Let's go to Andy Fiori for a point of it. One, one, Jacob, you know it's one, one. Jesus Christ. Thank you, Andrew. He quit to go work with Nick DePaulolo who raised his system self right off of serious XM a month later.

Good job jumping lily pads, Fury. Now we got Black Lou and good luck getting re-replaced on a Black guy. That's not going to look good in the HR department. Folks, if I could get serious with you here for a moment. My good friend, the late-great TV game show legend, an animal rights activist, Bob Barker, and I used to bang prices right models after work at one of his no-kill animal shelters. If the look on said Cage Papia's could talk, Bob, we love you and we miss you. And folks, on behalf of everyone

here on the bonfire, please, please, please, spay a new to your pets. Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Moving on to question number three, and this one is for Dan Soder, Daniel. Yeah, Jake. It's no secret that Big J. Ogerson started his comedy career in Philadelphia with who can only be described now as

celebrity megastar Kevin Hart. And although Big J. Ockerson hasn't spoken to him in years, sadly, he still refers to him simply as Kev. And And Forced I'm gonna tell you right now Jacob Jacob just fills his hate hump like a camel Oh, dude. And then just lets it out at live shows. And it's like when you talk shit to your parents in front of companies so they can't hit you. Uh-huh.

Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Can't. Can't. Yeah. This is, this is fucking brilliant. Yeah. Oh, welcome to the Bonfire, Robert Kelly.

Ah. Woo! Woo! And to put insult to injury on a recent live bonfire, while Big J. Ockerson was in the middle of a scathing review of his friend, Kav's latest stand-up special, he was interrupted by none other than our very own black Lou. Who in the midst of a hysterical giggle fit declared? That n words funny. So the question for you, Dan, is if Big J. Ogerson had the opportunity to slink his way back into the good graces of his friend, Kev, would he agree to A. Don A. Speedo and hand wash every automobile in Kevin Hart's muscle car crew or B. Go down on

his nemesis, rocker Sebastian Bach while he sings its classic tune. I'll remember you or C. Sit through three hours of new stand-up material from Australian funny they Hanna Gatsby. What say you, Dan Soder? What say you? We're not gonna cop out and say all of the above. I know Jay wouldn't do the speedo because he showers in the dark. B. B. B. B. It was a good joke and Sebastian Bach was a bitch about it.

I think, and I know this because I've watched hours of terrible shit with J. J would pick C. Three hours from Hannah Gatsby. Just to make fun of it. Big J. Ocasin, is he right? That's a lot of Gatsby. What Gatsby are we talking about? We're talking about Alan of the notebook screaming at me That would be it her problems or like the

Nayou but also I've got a dog All of it all of it Oh dry we counted I know notice this cis gender goal is in my driveway Why is it your pack on a on a driveway, but your drive on a pack-wise? I miss that. I miss the voice so much. I would love to be in Kevin Hart's pussy pack. Hmm.

Dan's right. I'll get through Gatsby. I'll take notes. A point for Dan Soder. Let's go to Andy Fiori with a score update. What? Let's go to Andy Fiori with a score update. Sorry.

I was trying to check out crotch shots on the call. Two to one Dan. Two to one want to end. You don't want to end to Bob. He's not the best scorekeeper in the business for nothing, folks. Andy Feele, give me a butt light. Please, they know it's going to be a penis, right? What? It's the upskirt shot on the coal. No, no, no. It's gonna be a penis. Shut up. Yeah. Yeah. That's Irish drunk right there. He goes nah, dude, let me taste it.

There's a penis, bro. What? She has a penis, bro. Her name's the coal, so. Correct. Right, right. She has a penis. She has penis.

It? Andy. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Shut up. His son, buddy. Buddy, there's a penis right the watch to daa show him. Yeah. Yeah, we're just making sure you're there. You are there, right? He's gonna try to fuck her and get in Joe's way of having a sequel. Oh no. Oh no, you're gonna get spit roasted by the Rosa and Andy Fiori. Oh holy shit. 2C minuses fuck your rocker or roll. No offense Andy. Joe's not the rope. Moving on. Our next question is for Robert Kelly. Robert.

Yes, Jacob. Christine Evans, Jay's longtime girlfriend, is out for a night on the town with her gal pals. Jay has the night off and invites his good friend, comedian Justin Silver, over to hang. They do some shots, watch some MMA, and smoke a little riefer. Jay comments on how fit one of the MMA fighters is.

Justin tells Jay, I could get you into that shape with just a few push-ups, buddy It's a pretty good Justin. Thank you pretty good Jay doesn't believe him Justin takes his shirt off and proceeds to do push-ups in front of his good friend He suggests Jay do the same Push-ups in front of his good friend. He suggests, Jay do the same. With the sweaty MMA fighters on the TV, Justin and Jay begin a workout on the floor.

Hey, Jacob, is this fan fiction? Yeah, dude. I don't know where the fuck you are now. Did you jerk off to writing this question? Me, just get ready to fuck, dude. Are you fucking, Jacob, AI? I don't understand. Try to lose yourself in the story, dude. Are you fucking Jacob AI? I don't understand. Try to lose yourself in the story, gentlemen.

I'm lost in it. I see it. I'm there. With the sweaty MMA fighters on the TV, Justin and Jay begin to work out on the floor giggling, doing shots, and smoking more marijuana. When Christine Evans gets home four hours later, she is shocked to see Jay and Justin blank.

Cleaning up shit. That's your answer. No, it's not my answer. in their underwear on their thommies watching videos documentary videos of other comedians what fucking shit heads they are and Jay Ocasin and jerking each other off oh I was after the buzzer. Fuck you, Dan. I'll allow it.

Fuck you, Robert. No, fuck you. And it wasn't a trick question. It was fucking all of them. You could do that. Fuck you. You can pick all of them. Bobby, can I ask you a question?

Yes. I'm in my underwear. What am I wearing up top? Life beater. He's correct. My goodness. He's never. My goodness. He's never shirtless.

A point for Robert Kelly. Let's go to Andy Fiori for the point update. Keep track yourself. Andy Fiori everybody. Tutu, tutu, tutu. We have a tie, ladies and gentlemen. We have a tie. Our next question is for Dan Soder. Daniel, Jay has one extra ticket to see Metallica in concert.

VIP package backstage passes. Don't say it. Don't say it. But no, snake pit. Dan, let me ask you then, which one? Oh, hold on. It appears we've got a context alert app from Big Jim. Let's hear what he has to say.

This is a context alert from Big Jim. The snake pit is a coveted section at a Metallica concert right in the middle of the ring-shaped stage. Big J confidently promised he had tickets for the snake pit for Metallica in New York City. It would have been an amazing night for Bobby and his son Max, but when they got to the show, they were regular seats. Why do we pay these two dildos? Thank you Big Jim's context app.

Fellas, I gotta tell you, that app is so real, it's like Big Jim is here and shitting all over us. So Dan, the question is, which one of the following friends does Jay take to the show Josh Adam Myers or Justin silver and why? Josh Adam Myers Because he does not want Justin counting out the drum math right next to him buddy for a They're playing for it. They're playing eight. I think that I might answer for you, do you hate on my child's life? It was Josh and amires because Metallica's too drum heavy and Justin is going to air drum annoyingly the entire ladies and gentlemen a point for Dan Soder I mean

Boom boom I got your boy friends I've got your man. I got it. It's 2018. Oh Slums to go for I was good now. There's a good damn That was specific You know, I won 69 would wheel the fortunes van a white for over an hour and a half I fell asleep with my flaccid penis in her mouth and my head between her creamy thighs

Let's go to Andy Fiori for a point update. Why am I here? I actually forgot to keep score this time. You fucking alcoholic. Who got that last one? Dan got that last point. Andy Soder, three to two. Well, my goodness, ladies and gentlemen, we're going to have to take a break and cool off because it is getting hot in here. When we come right back, we'll be back with our bonus round question worth five points. Will Dan Soder take this? Or will Robert Kelly have the comeback of a lifetime stay tuned we'll be right back?

On Who Know J Best on the Bond Fire? Live from Skankfest Vegas, back to the Bond Fire with Big J-Occerson and Robert Kelly. All right gentlemen, each one of you claims to know big J. Oaker's in the best. But how well do you know his penis? You may have heard of it, you may have seen it, you may have even tasted it. Well now it's time to put pencil to penis. Under your chairs you will find a pad and marker. To the best of your knowledge please draw a rendition of J's penis for us, the contestant who comes closest to capturing the true essence of J's penis will win five bonus points. All right gentlemen, are you ready?

You may begin. I think this is going to hurt my feelings. I don't want to look until the end. I don't want to look until the end. Jay, let me ask you, you've now worked with both of these gentlemen, but if you had to, which one of them would you live with, and why? They're both from the best of my knowledge, pretty messy dudes, who were rely on a woman to do their cleaning for them. Now I also rely on... True that, shout out American values.

I also would like a woman to clean up after me, but I picked the wrong bitch. I think we'll be up late wearing tape over our mouths, trying to fall asleep together. Me and Dan can play video games, but I don't love wrestling. Final answer, Jay. Robert Kelly. So we can get fat and die together. Dan's not willing to commit he yo-yo's and wait. I would grow my stomach back for you. Thank you. I just on a diet of fun snacks.

Well thank you for that, Big J. O'Kristen. And let me tell you, I'm gonna take a sneak peek here because I just cannot wait. Let's see what we got here. Well, Jay, I don't know if that's your penis or not, but if it is Bravo, I'd like to destroy a few vaginal walls with that puppy myself. Thank you for that sneak peek, Dan. Let's see what we've got here with Robert Kelly. I'm trying so hard not to look, but it's hard. Ha ha ha ha. Well now, Jay, if that's your penis, I think you just earned yourself an invitation to my good friend, Jamie Foxx's house for a night of naked basketball. That's five naked

guys versus five naked guys, and whoever wins wins and whoever loses wins. That's five naked guys versus five naked guys and whoever wins wins and whoever loses wins. It's a lot of fun. We'll talk after the show. Let me ask you folks something who wants to see some penis on paper. Sure gentlemen you heard them tick tock tick tock. We want to see some cock. I'm gonna give you a few more seconds here. I fucked up the balls man. I fucked up the balls real bad. Yeah, you did. Jay, I'm seeing Robert Kelly doing some squiggly motions and with his hand that could end up being some pivotal pubic hair. We'll find out shortly. I'm gonna give you a countdown to three. And then

I'm going to have to say, markers down in three, two, one. Markers down, please gentlemen, markers down. Is this what you want you sick freak? Begin with Dan Soder, Dan. When I say I would like you to show your drawing of James Penis to the audience and to Jay and for our listening audience, would you mind describing your drawing and tell us why you drew it the way you did. Alright, Dan, are you ready? Yes. Let's see what you're packing. So you'll notice it's very fat, very fat, but short, because Jay complains about it quite often.

His balls large, volumous, shaved, and above sparse pubic hair that he talks about someday bringing together. I give you short fat cock. you short fat cock. I must say I do appreciate the stray hairs on the shaft of this penis it gives it a lifelike does. It is weird that the crat the penis tip doesn't go to the tip that's where I fucked that up. All right thank you for that Dan. Robert Kelly are you ready? I'm ready. Alright, Robert, let's see what you've been hiding. That's a good dog. Wow. This is what is Dick really looks like. Describe your drawing for us, Robert.

Tell us why you were inspired to draw it this way. I was inspired to draw this because a long time ago somebody posted a picture of Jay's penis on Craigslist, I think. Damn it. And I burned it into my memory because I knew he'd have it taken off. Oh, I forgot everybody saw my dick for real. And I believe I believe I gave him a white herb mustache pubes. Because I think that's what he has down there. And those are his balls for my memory.

He has a nice little cock. And he has really thin legs with an upper torso. That's bigger. If I may, ladies and gentlemen, point out the life-like fupa that... I did. I did. I did include the fupa. Because we're going to get surgery.

I fucked up. We're going to get surgery soon, but... I thought we were only drawing cocks. Alright, Big J. Ocarson. Would you please give a final look at the two contestants drawings? Well Dan's I don't know what the cumber bun is right before the head That was where you got circumcised

It looks like a Sunday morning cartoon. It really I'm childish I believe in the crowd with you under force villain is like oh Hey me loud you gonna suck that dick off You drew I just want to say from watching you sort of You drew the same thing four times and this was the worst one of them Jay Jay, can we please see tens alternate version. There's four testicles on this one. Oh, yeah There's four testicles on this one. Oh, yeah. Guys, art is subjective.

So he never took, like, a second swipe at how the foreskin should be. He was convinced that's... Is that not what your foreskin looks like? Art is subjective, but anatomy isn't. Sorry, dude. It was born at Hartford Hospital. A lot of mistakes were made. Big J. Oakerson, have you made your decision?

No, no, not yet. I have to talk about Bobby's now. No yet. Bobby, Bonfire reference has. Bobby has, in fact, seen my penis before and he is being really generous with that cock. Kiss ass! The balls are pretty on point except no fuzzies down there at all.

It was a Sunday. Okay, that's fair. This is disturbingly... Oh, and dude. I mean, it's a C-section scar of Sparce Hair. I got it, too. It's a fact, I think. I could never beat that. You don't know.

Checking my happy my decision. Well, great. But before that, let's hear from our final sponsor of the day. Lewis Johnson, take it away. The finale of Who Knows J Best is brought to you by Bobby Kelly's Sex Hut. Need a little lift in your libido? Ever wanted to take a relaxing vacation on your stomach and the lush woods of New Hampshire? Ever wanted to live weights while your spotter rides your cock?

Come to Bobby Kelly's sex hut. You're going to hell anyway. Might as well have fun. Now accepting reservations for the winter season. Swingstrap Wands & Sleeves available upon request. You're a fuck yeah! Thank you. Well, well We've seen a lot this game haven't we? A lot of highs and a few lows

Well now it all comes down to this two contestants two penises Well now it all comes down to this. Two contestants, two penises. One, everlasting friendship. Who knows Big J. Ocarson the best? It's time we find out right now. Big J. Ocarson! Pick your penis! This is hard, but also so easy. Robert Kelly has joined a more accurate piece.

He's done it. Robert Kelly knows she best. Congratulations to Robert Kelly. Look at him ladies and gentlemen. Robert Kelly knows J. Best. Let's hear it for him. Ladies and gentlemen, Robert Kelly knows Jay Vest. Let's hear it for him. Look at this.

And please give a round of applause for our runner-up, Dan Soder. It's just like the territories. You going on your back, brother? I love you, Jay and Bobby. I hope you're happy in your new life. Bobby, I hope you're happy in your new life. Bobby, congratulations and now let's have Andy Fiori bring your prize for winning who knows J best.

And there he goes, getting up from his chair. I missed that. I didn't want to pick that mic up, but that seemed crazy. I don't know. I didn't mad at me at Cox up, but that seems crazy. I don't know what it mad at me a coxaca. No congrats Fobby Andy you pick the race is gentleman the winner of the who knows J best It's Bobby Andy. Oh, thank you Andrew. Hey, I got a present. Yes, please and Bobby I'll hold that for you if you mind Robert Kelly. Oh

snake Robert Kelly is I hope to sneak. Robert Kelly is opening up the box present. We're about to find out Robert Kelly is opening up the box and what's this? Is that hold on a second? Is that what I think it is? My goodness, it is ladies and gentlemen, it's the 70% of the stomach that Robert Kelly had removed because he couldn't control his eating. Re-united once again, it's Robert and his stomach. Wait a second, Robert Kelly seems to be pulling something out of the stomach.

Is that what I think it is? It is! It's a Snickers bar! That's been sitting inside of his stomach for years. Ladies and gentlemen, Robert Kelly is eating the Snickers. You can take the stomach. It's so wet. Yeah.

Does that mean I want to one year's stomach? Ladies and gentlemen, this just proves you can take the stomach out of the fat fuck, but you can't take the fat fuck out of the stomach. Wow. Congratulations to Robert Kelly, everybody. I beg you. Can't congratulate since the Robert Kelly everybody. A big. Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Dan Soder. Gratul, Gratul for life, love you guys.

I'm been your host Jake Batat, thanks for playing. Take it away, fellas, back to you. The great Jacob Batat thanks for playing take it away fellas back to you the great Jacob Batat everybody That was fine Robert Kelly's first ever live on fire We fucking love you guys hanging with us man. We can't wait to bring you years near as more of this shit, man Thank you all fucking give it a Thanks coming out

We fucking love you guys Before you get out of here every live show we do man What are the fucking tradition is Chris Rogers paint something for us over there, man? He's a fucking legend, dude He's OG with the fucking show since early days of movie towers should absolute amazing artists at all since Texas checkers Check it shit out man mix noise for fucking Chris Rogers All fucking weekend man. We love you buddy. I give it up for everybody now. Give it up to DJ Lou Andy Jacob black Lou Christine

Now give it up for T.J. Lou Andy, Jacob, Black Lou, Christine, Robert Kelly, Big J, we love you guys, love you guys. All right, I office has left the building. I told you absolutely straight up to this point you know that he has left the building. He left the stage and went out the back with the policeman and he is now going from the building. Hey everybody, thanks for listening. That was just a portion of our actual serious XM radio show. If you want the whole thing, go to seriousxm.com slashbombfire for a special offer. That's right, and go to bigjcomedy.com and robbercallylive.com to check out our standup dates

coming to a city near you. Go lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo