The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - The Bonfire Holiday Spectacular Part 3. (feat. Shane Gillis)

Episode Date: December 22, 2021

Part 3 of the Bonfire Christmas Spectacular has Big Jay getting tipsy with the great Shane Gillis as guest!Stream "The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson & Dan Soder" for 3 months free on the SiruisXM app! Offer Details Apply: www.SiriusXM.com/BonfireFollow us on all social media @TheBonfireXM @DanSoder www.DanSoder.com@BigJayOakerson www.BigJayOakerson.com

Hey I'm Big J. Ocarson and I'm Dan Soder and welcome to the Bonfire Podcast. Yeah it's a podcast and it's also a radio show. You can hear our full show every day on Series XM. Go to SeriesXM.com slash Bonfire for a special offer. And now the Bonfire with Big J. Ocarson and Dan Soder. And now back to the Bonfire holiday spectacular with Big J.on and Dan Soder live from the village underground in New York City best believe notes about that karma is my name put it on shame.

We're gonna be in the end, end, end, end, end. Here it is, now here's my name, summer rain. I am pain, I am glory. I am what they say in the history. Let me tell ya, if you wanna fuck with me, you'll fuck with my whole family. Welcome back to the Bond Fire Live for the Village Underground. Hopefully, yeah. We like to have some rain on the show and then we read the black loose showed us the DMs and he was like she's like I want to launch My merchandise you guys should help me

Now she played like it she goes you should help me she goes because she go first sentences because I'm a mentally Disabled person No, no, no, no person. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. And I was like, let's read, Jay was right. Jay goes, let's read the DMs. And then we read it fully through and she said, I tell you what you said. I know the exact, she goes, guys, you know, I'm actually a mentally disabled person. I'm bipolar and the genius. So it's back on.

So we're cool. So it's actually not that big of a deal. Turns out she's just crazy arrogant. And possibly a little mentally ill. We thought we were making fun of an autistic person, fucking dancing on a stripper pole. But it's just a dummy. Rang and dang, dang, dang. That would have been great.

Do the song plays for fucking seven more minutes after she's done It's awesome, and we will help her with her merchandise a hundred percent by the way FYI she calls it the summer rain strain So true You're not running that's exactly what you're ready American strain Fuck the island boys. We're team summer rain. I'm telling you for easily a hundred and fifty dollars You can get her to fly up and dance in a pole in your house. Free mail? I'd probably say less. Possibly a free mail.

She's fucking bipolar and the genius. The best. What a great way of following up a mental diagnosis. I mean, Jesus Christ. I'm depressed in a stallion in this sack. I guess that's how you got to sell your mental health. She's just left of everything. Pretty great body. It's always just like... Well then let's lift her up. Yeah, we need to join do another spring break shot Did I do my shot? That's the weed You did your shot God you're so fucking spring break. You didn't even joke it. I'm not even fucking drunk. You piece of shit

What's the problem? I did do something fucked up. I want you so drunk that at the end of the show you're just like a sleeve on the chair I want to put a blanket on you like I did my mom when I was in middle school Christine two minute French me on stage. Uh. Uh. Kiss me. Two minutes of it. Uh.

Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh.

Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh. Look what you do to me. Oh, Jay, your penis is empty. I'm y'all worked up with that makeup. Ugh. You want to bring our guest up? Yeah. Please welcome back to the holiday extravaganza from Gillian Keves

and his own special on YouTube, Shane Gillian. Be a bowl. Yeah. Be a bowl. The young bull. Yeah. The young bull. Ah. Yeah. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Shane, welcome back. Hey. Last time we had a holiday show, Shane Taklaus came by. Have you ever heard of him? Yeah. I lost that gig. I, uh, what happened to someone think of some old podcast?

Yeah, they dug some stuff up. Yeah, it's an anti-Rain Deer stuff. Yeah, it's an anti-Elves. You're not supposed to use the house. The house can't even drive. I'ma tell you right now it's a pretty little... With their little eyes, with their little eyes. Yeah, I keep those elves, they keep being all damn reindeer.

reindeer, much a little man. Yo, I don't know if you guys got to see it. When you introduced the last guest, I thought it was me. So I already walked about halfway up. I didn't even see that. Yeah, I walked up. And Sean, the fucking idiot he is, was just behind me. Didn't say anything.

He didn't say anything. He just let you almost go. He didn't say anything. He didn't say anything. He just let you almost go. He didn't say, hey, I think I'm next. You know, Shane, you want to see what a guy I've become? Yeah. That was so full. That was a full white cloth. It's like sort of full.

Yeah, there's liquid in here. There's a little liquid in there. Thank you for being honest, Daniel. Miss, would you, would you, check it out. Check it out. Oh, on. Dan's gay.

Yeah. I'm sure you touched your last year of the gay one. Oh, dear Dan. Why did you finish your pussy, Dan? Damn. Did you have to get, or you get, I ain't falling off the fucking wagon for a white car. Dude, I would tell you what, it might be the thing

to come back for. Yeah. Yeah, that all that, the fucking wagon for a white claw? Dude, I would tell you what, it might be the thing to come back for. Yeah. Yeah, that all that. Did Shane's beach run? I know you love a successful Shane bullying. When I first went into the show, I did a show in Philly with six and Shane, or last Wednesday, and he was,

and right away when I walked in, he did a half tickle to my side of my tum tum. Because he knows it works. And he knows it works. It's a mental game. The rest of the night, it's all I was obsessed about. Is he gonna do it again? Because I don't want to pee in front of my girlfriend. Were you gonna do it again? No. It's that's the mind game, dude. That's the mind game.

Maybe. Yeah, it's part of the bullying, dude. Jay, I would honestly, if I were you, I'd worry that Tickle wasn't off the table. Yeah, what you think this is, dude? Tickle right now. Oh, dude, come on. I got you a gift. Now, dude, I'll pee.

Not in front of the tennis girls. Dude. Oh, true. Nice work, tits. Tits. That's the space station. Nice work, tits. That's the space station. Those are centerfold of a fucking very black pornographic magazine tits.

Central King? Yeah, she's doing like a little Kim pose holding a cake. I don't know why, that's where I picture. Damn, dude, you should have had a life in Porto in like publication magazine. I would have been a great porn director. I doesn't seem that hard of a job. No, I told him the show before, best wise, when the girl who said she wanted me to take pictures ever from Playboy, we were younger.

And she goes, keep bringing over some Playboy pictures so I can know how to pose. And I went, yeah. And I cut out two Playboy, we were younger. And she goes, keep bringing over some Playboy pictures so I can know how to pose. And I went, yeah. And I cut out two Playboy pictures and the rest were fucking pure smut, dude. And she was like, really? Do they split lip on Playboy now?

I go, yeah, they got to ramp things up, you know what I mean? Times are changing. Times are changing, man, move your shake and win the power, man. You know what I mean? You got to show the inside. It's what happens when you go against cable, I guess. Do you ever get caught with smut?

No, not really. I mean, I was an internet age guy. Yeah, so they would catch it. They would catch it. They would catch it. They would catch it. They would catch it. They would catch it.

They would catch it. They would catch it. They would catch it. They would catch it. They would catch it. They would catch it. They would catch it. They would a maxim. That doesn't count. That doesn't count. They didn't, I didn't like hide it. I would just, I would, I would, I would,

I'm just trying to find the new portable speakers of the season. Yeah, I would tribute it though. You ever tribute? No. What's that mean? Yeah, I don't worry about it. Yeah.

No, he didn't attribute it. Shout out to the dogs that knew what a tribute was. Yeah, dude. Explore. What's tributeing? Does everybody know who knows? He went, it's tough to flush a magazine page. That should sell it for you, right?

Yeah. Come in and make a tribute. No, not the lady. Oh, it's tributeing coming on the pictures. Yes. That makes sense. Somebody posted a picture of my dad on a Reddit. It was like, contribute.

Shades, shades, shades, shades, shades, shades, shades. Phil was getting come tributeed. like, contribute to this. Damn. Phil. Phil was getting come true, me, did he? Oh, damn, dude. Do you make a little talk? You know what I'm about that? He'd be very, very upset about it. Yeah, he was, you got to get a change in your radio program.

I've got people coming on me. What are you doing there? What is this? What are you doing? What the fuck, what the fuck? Dad, they're coming on that picture of you golfing. And he's like, Did I take a care of you kids? Did I take a care of you kids?

Did I do my best? Did he put his reader on to look at it? He's like, What's this? What the fuck? What the... What the Christ is this? What's on there?

What's a tribute? That's how I'm dead. He's attributing you. My fans are tripping. I never understood that. I felt like once you came on a magazine, it was just done. You were just.

Yeah, yeah, unless you're an eighth grade. Yeah, what? And then, you're like, oh, I'll hide this. Yeah, good. Buddy, are you kidding? I found magazines in the woods, like the fucking old wives tale. And I'm telling you,

the pages were stuck together with somebody else's come and I kept them. Yes. I mean, you found precious. You just pretend that it's from the fucking creek. Yeah. Oh, this is normal creek gunk. Oh, this is the creek or sticking these pages together. Yeah, guys, it's the humidity that keeps the pages together.

Just to peel someone else's cuck. Tell me what my mom, my mom probably did the same thing. She was probably like, this is just gunk. This is in my young boys. This is in my young boys. And trying to gently do it to fucking separate to come without ruining the picture, is its own art.

Really is. I feel like you're hurtlocker with separating pages of gum. Descend in J and he just pulls it apart. God, Dan, do you think there's even fucking white claws in this place? I mean, can I have one? Guys, make a white claw stat. You got a white claw?

What was long you dude? I'll fucking make out. I offered to bring you claws, dude. Do you want a kiss? No. You kiss for a white claw? Oh, yeah. Dude, I can't wait for that phone call tomorrow or Jay's like, how'd the show go?

Yeah. Dude, do we kill? Hey, got a little murky after Jacob came out with his two dongs. What do you think of Jacob dressed like that, huh? I liked it. I'll be honest with you. But also, I will say this.

You guys saved me tonight, pulling me out of the bullpen. I was fucking laying in bed with a lady watching fucking Harry Potter on her laptop. Oh my fuck! And I got the call, I got the last second call that comes down here, I was like, yeah I'll be there. For sure. Okay, I asked something. You're watching on a laptop, is that mean you were laying on your tum tum? Now, I was laying, I was actually sitting eating a bowl of chili.

On the bed? What the fuck? In my own bed. Yeah, what a daredevil. What did you gather chili from this time at that? My bitch made me chili. She got you chili. She said, watch it Harry Potter.

I said, I'm better off chili. In a crockpot? Yes. Full homemade chili. Yes, Dan. Dan, Dan, Dan. I'll say what the crockpot chili is a motherfucker though, because that means that meat's been fucking stewed.

Hmm. Was it good, Chili? It was great, Chili. Now I'm walking around here means that meat's been fucking stewed. Mm. Was it good, Chili? It was great, Chili. Now I'm walking around here. I didn't think I was gonna drink tonight. Pulled me back in. Now I'm walking around hitting Bud Light, Chili Burps.

Yeah. Just crushing that back row. I was walking back and forth back there. We're gonna get that. Welcome to Hell, idiots. You're God. Why do 100% of burps smell like hot dog? Even if it's chili?

I don't know, or change what hot dogs. I don't know, or change what hot dogs. Shane Stummicks bouncing around like that fucking bomb and die hard with avengence. The liquid mix. Yeah, that buttlight fucking chili is about to make you poor. Oh, you see, yeah, separately, these things are harmless, but together.

Put them together and you put it on a fucking nickel and it blows up. I'll tell you what, when that bed lights on, you're gonna wish you had a white claw. Don't you like I'm a Jay? I guess you don't wanna show your titties head of a limo roof later. Don't.

I'm trying to put alcoholism towards Jay. I'm trying to get on my side. Yeah, Dan's doing, he's drinking through me. They're gonna do it again, do it. I actually like what you're doing. Yeah, he's like, dude, he goes, fucking a French afat stranger. I'm like, okay.

I'll do it, because that's what you would have done. It's like Sims, but with addictions. I got my little green, fucking gem over Jay right now. Like, drinking another one, now go piss in the corner. LAUGHTER Excited for Christmas this year?

Uh, yeah. Last time we did a live Christmas show, tough year. This year? I had a bad year. This year's going all right. Yeah, the fucking special on YouTube. Yeah. Shout out to live from Austin.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 2.5 million views in two months. Yeah. Got Gillian Keaves. Yeah, that was fun. Not as big of a picture. The sketches are phenomenal. Thanks.

St. Ruggies, yes. St. Ruggies blessed me. Does he send you Christmas presents now that you're in the... No, but what text? In the militia. We text. Yeah. It was funny.

I don't have his current number for sure. Me and Lewis were finding this out. When we were in Austin, Texas at the Creek in the Cave. Rebecca has his current number. And I was like, you know, as I said, like, by the way, it's so funny how much I lead always with like, I don't think this show is really my thing. Rogan, but like, I'll do it for the press. And 100% I'd reach out to him and he wouldn't get back to me. And then me and Lewis were both like, he didn't get back to me either.

I was like, let's both have Rebecca, who has the number, read the fucking, a few digits and see if we have the right or wrong number. And in the area code, me and Lewis were both like, I don't have his number. Damn. I always had this. I don't have Kevin Hart's current number either and we got sucked off by Camden Hooker

together. It's going to be fun when you don't, when we don't have, we don't have, we don't have Shane's number. Shane's got like a weird level. I can't wait. It will be dead. It'll just be because I'm fucking dead dude. Yeah. They go, sorry, I got this number. I just got a new phone. Who's this? The last guy died. No, I have two dead I have three dead people's numbers in my phone. If you call those numbers now and just go like just you know, you have my good friends dead phone number. It's fun.

Absolutely. Text whoever has your dead friend's phone number and to let them know. I got my stuff in O Patrice and Kimowitz. All three of those people are fucking, uh, I thought it'd be more funny. My dad is hell. They're so dead. My dad dropped out during landlines.

Really? Yeah, don't even need an area. Just call your dad's landline and be like, hey, this was my dad's. What are you drinking? Is there any rum and coke? That's what he would drink. The hell's going on, boys? Well, I started to get back.

I thought you were asking me about rum and coke. I was like, what? I tell you. We in bits are talking. Yeah. When we went to see Huey Lewis and Jimmy Buffett, Jimmy Buffett together, Dan Way underplayed his father's Jimmy Buffett thing and the connection,

and we were walking out, because at one point I was like, we watched Huey Lewis and we watched like three Jimmy Buffett songs that were just gone awful. And I was like, hey, I'll leave whenever you're ready to leave. And he goes, yeah, you're just like two more. And I'm like, oh, you're enjoying this. Okay, fine, we stayed for two more. I'm like, should we go now?

Yeah. And then we were walking out. He stopped one song and started another. And Dan just goes, oh, that son of a sailor. I should listen to it. And I realized I was pulling away from his fucking memorial for his father just going like this guy is gay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, this guy is sucks dick and Dan's like yeah, it sucks dick. Oh, that song reminds me of him.

He used to make me French toast on Sundays. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no Man. Pretty sad. Pretty dark stuff. You were feeling it. We're welcome to the car. You were like, oh, that's son of a son of a son. I'm like, should we go back and get you go? I've come to miss the song tonight. Now it's stupid. Not bummed to be around the people at a Jimmy Buffett concert are fucking incredible people watching.

They're all hammered in their fifties, ready to fuck and fight. Let's just say they don't shave their possees for a big night. Shout out Christine. Yeah Christine James are pussy for big nights. I think so she said her legs. There's making her fucking box might be a wolf He's a white cloth got this Oh, we can't have shape the balls And Shane's here This is the clothes and chains here It's like the prestige Yeah, if you're here, there's been two of me this whole time. Oh my god. Oh my god.

My god, Merry Christmas is Black Santa! Wait a sec. Santa! Black Santa! Hey, hey, hey, hold this cage. This is not to what could save this white radio show. Oh my god, what's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What Radio show Change across the black Santa Yeah, let's give it out

Like it What's he giving out, man? What's he getting? Oh, blue egg DVDs. Blue egg DVDs. Hell yeah. Hell yeah. What do you got? A player's club through a Sony handicap. Yeah, you look like you need some spices in your life. They go some spices, man.

Oh, hell yeah. Go ahead and take that. Black Santa. Black Santa, get up here, Black Santa. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's up, Black Santa? What's going on? No strength to cause this year. We, Black Santa. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's up, Black Santa? No shaking pauses here.

We got Black Santa. What's up, dude? That's right. Hell yeah. Fuck yeah. This makes sense. It's a white man losing his job, dude. What's up, Black Santa?

Basically, I'm basically Jake from State Farm at this point. Ha, ha, ha. Jake from State Farm is black now? Yeah. You had a fucking Holmes. He's black now? Yeah. You had a fucking secret handshake with black Santa? Sorry, Jay. Black Santa likes me better than you.

He's got gifts for everybody. Just for everybody in here. All right. A black Santa's brought gifts for the fucking house? Straight up. Who? Is it a spinner? What?

Yo, shut the fuck up. Shane, you didn't have a spinner when you were Santa Claus? Yeah. Oh, you had with Jacob on your lap, and I was white. I was white, I was white, Santa Claus, dude. I kept it... Exactly, I was Santa Claus, shoot a bence. You're fuck white, Santa.

Jacob, what are you doing? Yeah, I hit Jacob. I'm only up here to give him this mic. Oh, thank you. Jacob. Jacob. Yeah, I didn't want Shane to see me like this. Shane, how long has it been? I've been on this for years.

Jacob hasn't been on stage at all, so he just dressed like that. Look at that ass. The floor is really wearing on it. But it's focused on the dicks too, but Jacob's got a little nice tight package. They're a tangled actually. I want to apologize to the wait staff who have to keep walking around my dogs. I never thought you were gonna say that.

Jacob, you'll be surprised. I bet Jacob's got a thickie. Oh yeah. He walks off and carries a thick. Jacob, don't go, black sand has got to get for you. Got a little good for you. Look, I don't know why he would don't really fuck or wash clothes.

You know what I'm saying? Which black people find really disgusting. You should use your hand. You just do everything with the soap in your hand. When I suck in gross. That's fucking gross. You know, when you put it like that, it is a good point.

Yeah, it's not a good point. Jacob, or whatever your dumb alien name is, think it's wash cloth. Oh, yeah. Yeah, wash your face off. Merry Christmas. You're like a fool. Don't just put soap on your body. Merry Christmas. You like a fool. Don't just put soap on your body, a fucking white weirdo.

Ladies and gentlemen, the first alien with two dicks and no bitches. Hell yeah. You're a jake of wash your ass. Yeah, jake of shit stains and mildew on that and then keep using it. You want to have black Christmas or not? You white devil, what are you dumb? I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it.

I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it.

I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it.

I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. Let me tell you when I use a washcloth, when I go to a hotel that instead of soap, they have those conditioner shampoo, fucking shower gel. I use it on Thursday when I get into town. By Friday, I've bought soap. That's such a fun drunk brag. And by the way, I picked up paper towels. I buy soap.

Guys, just so you know, I watched 2020. And also, I made sure that their conditioning was turned down. So you're welcome. So you guys won't be hot or cold. Black Santa, you got gifts for the other staff members? I do, I do. I had to sell, make something special for you, playboy. All right.

Hell yeah, hell yeah. This is a 5xL du rag. Oh, shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I can't help you put it on, because I don't have a step lighter or long enough armors for that head. You said it wasn't possible. Yeah, we're going to get you some ways in here.

You said it didn't make it. Sometimes you give up hope and then fucking sometimes hope is restored. Oh, Christmas miracle. Hey, don't you guys think Dan should wear it on camera? Yeah! Hey guys! Don't you think, uh...

Yeah! Don't you think it would be very good for his career to be wearing a durag right now on camera? It's a Christmas Miracle. I think you lied, I don't think this takes 5x at all. Hey Dan, just so you know where I'm at and drunk. I'm at the point where my hiccups are almost throw-ups. Yes. Yes.

Well, it looks like we got some round of cover. You're using it to your power. Use it to your power. Hey, I had a joke with that Sonic Jersey guy. Isn't it funny that team left just like your dad did? Yay! That's time to say that. Come on with.

You know what I mean? By the way, this is clearly a large thing. Now you got to wait for my dude. Don't try to say that come on with. You know what I mean? By the way, this is clearly a large, that's the thing. No, you got way to do it. Don't try to say your great. You don't try to say your great. I know you're fucking cumty style. Oh wait, it won't fit. A do-rag. It's one of the guys fits all of them.

You spit my eye, did you give me on the crumb? So sorry. You got a variant. Damn it, dude. That's what it's called. Oh, man. It's a real game. What a... That's what it's called.

That's what it's called. That's what it's called. That's what it's called. That's what it's called. That's what it's called. That's what it's called. That's what it's called. That's what it's called.

That's what it's called. That's what it's called. That's what it's called. That's what it's called. That's what it's called. That's what it's called. That's what it's called. That's what it's called. That's what it's called. That's what it's called. That's what it's called. They wouldn't be mad at all. They'd be so mad, dude. I was listening to NBA Street volume 2 soundtrack on the way here.

It's great. It's so good. Which is great. And Street Hoops. Street. Anybody listen to this? Do you just listen to Street Game soundtracks? My shout out Billy, he sent me those Street Hoops playlist

on Spotify. You're going to be like, damn, those were the days. Hold up. I got to look this up. Now look at, man. NBA Street Volume 2 is one of the greatest video games of all time. It is. Here's what I'll say. I know we're doing a bit. NBA Street Volume 2 has the greatest single video game sound or song on it,

which is when they reminisce over you. But soundtrack street hoops, let's go. I'm a 2K 22 guy. Play station 5, that's how I'm living. True. All I can find is street ball classics. I'll send it to you, dude. All right, thanks, dude. Jacob, Jacob, can I get a butt light? You sure can.

Thanks. Damn, do you hear how excited Jacob was to get you? I know, me and Jacob are mad. Guys, I might be drunk or I smoked a lot of weed, but like, I'm having deja vu. Has all this already happened? Oh. Dude, I love it.

Dude, this is usually drunk in the back of a cab talk. Hey, this has already happened. Oh, that's stuck your dick already? Oh, there it is going, hold on. Did you come in my mouth? There is my mouth just salty. Black Santa, do you have any more gifts? Oh, I got a couple more gifts.

Hell yeah, especially for you big Jay Okay, I got you some tight-to-to diabetes medication. Oh I am at that age working on your weight man. I am at that age. Yeah, I'll get my name on it. Jason Yeah, because in Darnell losses right foot last week man. God damn right. Yeah, I said I ruled off now We just fuck with him call a stumpy and shit one love Darnell Jay you're gonna have to stop drinking those sugary white claws. You shit your mouth. Why do I not have another white call? Christine Did you uh? Did you okay the fucking type two diabetes bit who came up with that?

Apparently a fucking doctor because it has my name on the prescription. Oh, wow. That's wild. I found some other shit for you too, player. Yeah! Push and pull. Sugar, sugar, sugar. Oh my god, it's so hard to open.

It's actually not that much sugar in those things. Really? Yeah. Fuck yeah. You're just making this holiday. Oh yeah. I'm trying to have a tough I'm just thinking the fucking bathroom Black Santa what else you got I got something for my man DJ Lou over here. Oh, yeah, first of all them titties are nice, but

Yes, wait, but black Santa. Yeah, I listen, I understand these These are fucking MVP of the G league. Dude, those titties over there. I didn't see those from back there. Those titties start in the middle of her puttorso. It's crazy. I feel like Jay's trying to dawn king these tits and set them up against each other. Yeah, guys, I'm sorry.

I did sign those tits so we could go. I am trying to advertise them a little bit. Hey everyone, I'm a only pants pimped Your tits are fine. Yeah, right? They're beautiful. Thank you. Don't let all these massive milkers fucking make you feel insignificant Your tits are fucking fine dude look at you coming through with the Christmas tit compliment. I'm just trying to bring up the Christmas cheer dude You see that tree burn, dude? That pissed you right off, didn't it?

That pissed me to fuck off, dude. I know there was some fucking Muslims. That's that fucks news. And they're trying to ruin Christmas. I don't know if you guys are really not gonna come. Shane has diagnosed himself the warrior for Christmas. Dan, as a tick connoisseur as you are. Yes.

Oh, you play this game when we real quick? Oh, no, I know Dan's games. Yeah. Dan, you play this game when we real quick. Oh, no, I know, I know dance games. Yeah. Then you love the milkers. These are, Dan, these are magazine worthy tits over here. Do you think? No, don't let Shane lead you to a dark path. You have a lady. You're the lady who love. But let's just say she died in a fiery helicopter accident. I would honor her. I would honor her. I would mourn her. Dan.

As a tribute. So it's that. Yeah. So we got a tribute line in it. As a tit connoisseur, do you say is wherever she starts to cover the tit, that's where Nipple start dinner plates. Or do you think silver dollars on a massive tit? Dan your thoughts.

LAUGHTER Looking without looking? No, you should look, dude. I've tested you now starting your fault anymore. Yeah, of course I have. Show your fault anymore. Of course I have. Sorry.

All right, that's... I said sorry. All right, thank you... I said sorry. All right, thank you very much. But, well, you will tell us what you would do to those tips if you had to do something. I say silver dollars. Say a gunpoint, and I say,

you say you better do something to those tips. Silver dollars, questions and jails. I'm not a loser. You better do something. You better do something. You better do something. You're saying fucking milk saucers. I said, not milk saucers.

Silver dollars. Silver dollars. Miss? Let's ask my new homeie. You're saying fucking milk saucers. I said, not milk saucers. You're talking. $10. Miss? Let's ask my new homie. Yeah! Josh, this new homie. Oh, I've been scouting out this homie for the last hour and 20.

I think I knew it would be my final homie. Josh, will you introduce your new homie to the stage? Josh, please, pick her in your apartment. She can fit into my apartment. Fuck yeah, dude. It's got into my apartment. Fuck yeah, dude. It's got, my apartment's got this level 10. Josh, what's your thoughts on this? I say dinner plates.

I say these nips are fucking heavy circumference. I'm saying about three inches. What? You think silver dollar? Yeah, I think they're biggies. What a weird estimation. Three inches. What? You think silver dollar? Yeah, I think they're biggies. What a weird estimation. Three inches. Break the heart and tell them who's right.

I don't know what. You guys don't measure your nipples. You don't know the size of your nipples. You don't worry about being in a locker room conversation where everyone's talking about nipple size. You got to speak up. They're in the middle. In the middle? They're not tiny and they're not ginormous. Just right you got some goldie-lock the mean

Like a brajute and fake plate Sorry, I'm a fucking oars divorce guy Hey lady, it's Christmas what size of your nipples? Hey lady, it's Christmas. What size are your nipples? What you shut the fuck up and tell us about your nipples? I like, I love the answer medium. She has medium nips. This is hilarious answer. They're not giant or they're not like puny. It's in the middle. Yeah. Goldie locks.

I don't mind some punies. Good for you. Three inches. Love a good puny, am I right, fellas? Let's leave her alone. Clearly both her parents are together. Yeah, she's got real fucking, I was raised right energy. Yeah, she was raised right. She was like, guys, I don't partake in this. I just like to watch it. I don't know how else to subscribe.

No, I believe you. Yeah, we believe you. Yeah. Yeah. Boxanna, any other gifts? Yeah, I still got that gift for DJ White Lou. Oh hell yeah. As much as he messes with them Latinas, he needs to get some spices in his stomach.

Hell yeah. So I've brought some spice for you young people. Seasoning, Lou. And you know what you can do for some on your toes if you want to get the sensation back. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Toby ass shit. Yeah, she's a diabetic. I think there you go. DJ Luke in his toes back. Are you guys going to make out what's happening? Jane Shader about to kiss. You guys get a kiss?

These guys haven't fun, dude. Fuck you, alcoholics. Get your life together. What you guys can't drink and have fun together? Yeah, you all fucking ruin an entire show. Damn, Black Santa. I love this center. I miss it.

You don't drink in real shows? Black Santa, what else you got for us? Well, well, well, what in the Wednesday atoms do we have going on here? Hey, girl, you want Black Santa for you, stocking up? Hey, I'm right for a J. Want you to come on up here? I got no something special for you. Christine Black Santa's gonna present for you.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, what's up, girl? And if this don't work for you, I'm gonna give you my number. You call me anytime. I also run a pipe cleaning service. You call me get your pipes clean, girl. Yeah. That ain't no entendre.

Black Santa got two jobs, nigga. I got kids. Some of the spikes in the building. No, dude, black Santa got two jobs, nigga. I got kids. Some of the spikes on that. No, dude, that's where the cheese takes go. I don't like that. I don't like that. Take it, but seriously, throw it away, but take it. No, don't bring it home, but I'll watch.

It is going to be fun for you to wake up hung over tomorrow next just to a black dildo and Christine sleeping on a couch. Like, oh, you fell asleep in bed. Sorry. Shana, you had you didn't get a big black dildo. Oh, fuck. Christina, you leaving with a black dildo?

Do you have it still? Oh, fuck. Don't fuck. Why are you trying to fall back my dick? Is that bigger than Jacob's alien dong? Jacob, what are you trying to fall back my dick? Is that bigger than Jacob's alien dong? Jacob, what are you doing? Kristina, how big is that? If you could tell me by hands, I'll be so upset.

She goes 10 inches. It's 10 inches. How do you know? How do you know? I don't know. Damn, dude. Let me feel the right on that. Wait, let me see.

Why is this thing, why is it? Shane, be honest with your back. Shane, be honest with your back. Shane, would that be a whole different life? Damn, man. Yes. I wouldn't be on the radio with this. It's a great life.

I'd be working a fucking U-Haul. Yeah, I keep it. Yeah, keep it. I'll put it in the secret closet. Keep it in the closet we never talk about. Keep it in the closet we never talk about. And you're secret. And you're secret.

And you're secret. And you're secret. And you're secret. And you're secret. And you're secret. And you're secret. And you're secret. And you're secret.

And you're secret. And you're secret. And you're secret. And you're secret. And you're secret. And you're secret. Well, no, it's not. Christine, your father's still alive. Please. Just compare and fake decks for Christmas. I don't like it. Take your dick and get out of here. Jesus. Right?

Happy birthday, Jesus. Happy birthday, Jesus. Yeah, I just watched a passion in the Christy other day. Yeah, no, you watch it once a year to get pumped up. She affives me up, dude. You know what they did to him? What's he even really the Roman do? It was mostly like...

I got a... That's a shame. That's a shame, tall day. It was mostly the big J's. No, half the big J's. Half big J's. Ah, the big J's. It crucified him.

No, just crucified him. Punch was gonna even the waps were like, what the hell you guys talking about? Half the big J's, half big J's. Ah, the big J's, it crucified him. No, it just crucified him. Punches, even the waps were like, what the hell you guys talking about? And then all the Jews were like, sss, do it. And all the waps, punches, pie at the waps was like, come on, hey, that's a bad idea.

I don't know if I want to do this. That's how you know you're watching. I tell you what, passion in the crisis is a weirdly short movie, dude. 15 minutes, that's nuts. Or is that just when I came? Oh. Damn, you disrespect Jesus with a bad joke.

How dare you disrespect Christ, dude. No, I mean, that was full. You're stone-cold. You're stone-co code and these fucking white clothes Don't pick it up. It's empty. Don't touch it now you're gay You have it now black sand is that it for kids? I got one more gift One more one more gift, okay, yeah, I know you make a lot of money from Gillian keys So I'll put I brought something for you to put that money in hell. Oh nice. Yeah, I

Like you to know I make zero dollars Gillian keeps There's better than any bank plan. Yeah, this is like a black person bank. Actually, it is. How? Yeah. Is what you guys use? Yeah. But I wonder if it's a good one. Two for one. Also a washcloth.

Yeah, wash it damn face to player. Damn. And you got a fucking drawing in there? You know, black say they don't trust banks. You don't trust the banks? Yeah, I'll trust banks. Banks closed. I'll just stay open.

I'll tell you what, back to that passion of the Christ talk we had. No shit. I don't trust the banks either. Black Santa bringing everyone together. Dude, that was so long ago. Yeah, Merry Christmas. Fuck y'all from Black Santa. Wait a second.

Oh, what the fuck? What the fuck is this? Everybody Black Santa everyone. Oh, yeah. It always got to be about Black Santa. Who invited Pete Best of the Butterfire. What the fuck everybody black Santa everyone Pete best of the bottom fire It always got to be about black Santa Andy your drug is the right Santa. Is that Chris Andy

And Andy get out of here Andy Andy you want to go on a year's ago it's been years dude Get the fuck out of here Yeah hold this no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no Show and he got canceled. No, no, no. I'm in on the air, baby. Oh my God, your shirt was under that thing. Instead of fucking disgust that. Do you have a, do you have a mom moods, full awful sand, which in your thing? Yeah. Get away from me. You creep.

We have a new Santa. Get out of here. I don't want it. Give me a kiss. Give me a hug. Yeah, yeah. I'm gonna do Santa. Get out of here. I don't not want it. Give me a kiss. Give me a kiss. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

White Santa, you're the best. Got that drink? Yes. Oh my God. I like your belt. Get the shot. Give him the shot. Thanks, baby.

Andy Fiori showed up. Nothing like a bonfire Christmas full of drunk family. We might have spilled some flax on this edge. You guys one more time for everybody. Come on up. Let's get Jacob. DJ Lou. Christine.

Yes. The anti-poi. Yeah! For the show. For the show. You guys at work. Christine, Josh Adam Myers, Jacob, Louue, come on, DJ Lue. Come back and we'll take a bite.

What a take, our last break, we'll be right back, it's the ball. It's the ball, fire, everybody! Woo-hoo-hoo! We make it up to there. We all make it. Yeah! Oh, Tits, you're leaving now of all things. It's the big goodbye, you fuck.

What the gracious, I can't take the Tits away on the very last thing. She travels like a house from up. Ha. Ha. Those balloons just leader. Ha. Oh, everybody, thank you so much for joining us on the

Thursday, fun fire show. Jacob Atom, Andy Fiori. Shane Gillis. Shane Gillis, Josh Edomars. Martin Lorne Black Blue. DJ Lou. Jacob Blackfield though. Christine and Blackfield though, power couple.

We love you guys so much, thank you so much for giving us shit. Dan Soder, DJ Alpacorn, Mary Christmas everybody. We love you guys so much for giving us little articulets. We love you guys. Thank you so much. Shake it. Merry Christmas, everybody. You've been listening to Sirius XM's Bonfire. New episodes every Tuesday through Friday mornings and full shows. You've been listening to SiriusXM's bonfire!

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