The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Time Permitting (feat. Justin Silver)

Episode Date: September 13, 2022

Justin Silver joins The Bonfire and gets questioned about his current social media promotion. The gang dives into a jailhouse doc A & E's 60 Days In.Stream "The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson & Dan Soder" for 3 months free on the SiruisXM app! Offer Details Apply: www.SiriusXM.com/BonfireFollow us on all social media @TheBonfireXM@DanSoder www.DanSoder.com@BigJayOakerson www.BigJayOakerson.com@IAmJustinSilver www.IAmJustinSilver.com

And now the bonfire with big Jay Okerson and Dan Soder can't seem to hear myself at all Myself Growing pains trying to find out if this song is on any mad It's maddened well good different headphones I did that earlier a lot of loose headphones. You know what? We kind of just fall into place. We kick around a little bit. Oh, get comfortable. Look at that. There it is. There it is. Thank you, Black Lou. The lighting is kind of weird. Luckily you should get another check because you just did 7,000 times better than the actual thing. You know there's two guys on staff to do what you just did.

Black Lou just turned lights on. He just Yes, the lighting is weird. It feels weird is weird feels weird it feels like it feels like we're right turn it up blue first off this the bonfire series xm faction talk one or three more than that I'm dan soda that's big jayokerson full full crew Jacob somewhere but we got Christine Marie Evans DJ Lewitsky and our black game the black tiger Lewis all at this point accredited ventriloquists. Yes, joining us probably will be a ventriloquist. He's one of the ventriloquists of the hymbeaus, Lord hymbeau,

the beast master Justin Silver. What's up, joining us now? Let me explain to people at home. We got kicked out of our studio again. Again, by another DJ. Yeah, I want to know I We have to be the most displaced show. They don't respect this one Iota your sons of Gary here, too Yeah, we really are really don't but

And they like that like guys love the show love the way everything's going. I just think it's phenomenal Would you do some street? Yeah, we have a new person coming in that wants to DJ by this light. Not even. Can you get out of here? LL Cool J. Just walked by and went. That one. That one. Two with two.

Oh, dance. Tight beard feeling good with them. Lick lips. Lick in my lips not getting beard hair. Yeah, we getting toyed today. You think I'm meant to hurt you? Then Dan, we had a little bit extra time. Dan came over and playing Dan and Matt and football footballs like playing on expert level. It's insane

Everyone's running around and doing stuff before the play and changes things depending on what my guys are doing Hot routes Danny. So he just ran run it's drags of slants and five and outs. I panic through two Interceptions Then I didn't throw it all and he sucked quarterback for a fumble picked up the ball scored three times on the same exact run. Did it with the dolphins? Most of it was left. Banging on Jay on an outside toss.

Lewin, I black Lewin, I have to play. He's getting a place like that. Lew, I don't I just I call I pick one of those three madden plays. Yeah, you do. I'm just one. Yeah, I just want to have fun. I don't want to live another life. When I'm sad, I watch Dan play video games. He used to watch me play Red Dead Redemption.

On the road, I'd bring it. I remember that, which is weird. You doing so great, Danny. I love it. I know you wanted to play, so it doesn't matter what's else going on. To me, it's like watching Cartoon. I don't play video games. But I was I was full only child moment where I was like, I'll just keep playing video game Yeah, is daddy watching? Was it got a war got a war you got a war you got into last of us last of us good to but the new got a wars coming out November ragna rock yet then dreamy like a fucking bitch in that game What am I he felt so bad? He was like play me in NBA now. We should play NBA and I was like I'm like

I don't see the second and be playing the other way that's the game I play all the time yeah Play me in NBA now we should play NBA and I was like I'm like I'm like Plan the other way that's the game I play all the time yeah, and then we set it on a UFC where we had a Banger of a fight five round five four rounds decision Can I tell you right now what this feels like in our new because we got moved studios? Mm-hmm, and I'm gonna tell you something and I don't know if it's because I'm high. I'll be playing this again No quick The same setup that we had in our longest studio I like five which then got moved we got moved out because of LL Cool J the first time and then they kicked this out And then we jumped to that studio this studio feels like we're all we're at home

But it's a movie set you're right. It's like a fake like they built our childhood home Oh, yeah, and you're like, but I know this isn't it It's fucked up. It's fucking I know like the way the lighting isn't everything. I'm like, oh, we're back in where we were For fucking years everywhere, but also it's it's not it is, but it's it's fucking with my head. It's weird But I do like it. Yeah, I'll get used to this studio real quick and then they'll move us. Yeah Where you gonna say black? I didn't love our last studio completely honest I didn't love it last day. I like that one. I didn't like the fighting with the sunlight I like the door the way the door opened on whoever was at the head of table Jacob took to me back shots

Yeah, yeah, yeah, fuck you. Well, we like this one better anyway. Yeah, he's like yeah now that I think about it I think I want to put that one. No, that one sounds cool. Come on man. Black little what were you gonna say? I'm gonna say it's like when they have a reunion on a show. Yeah. You put the set back together. Yeah. This is like max. This is like max is unsafe by the bell. Yeah. It's just friends. Friends reunion. The old couch. This is the windows being covered. It's different. Well, that's it. That's the first thing I said to DJ Liu when I walked in was like, remember when we used to make fun of that guy on high heat for doing a rocky rock

radio. Yes. I got something to listen to one, oh three Baghdad's only classic rock stage. Yes. He was like, we can't tell you who's saying. DJ Dave Hussein. Just got some heavily edited system of a down. Going to play that. that we're not allowing Jacob to sit down anymore I don't know why is my Jacob not a chair It's moody set sucks. I think L.O. Cool J is an extra chair in his studio. Do not touch it Do not go in come on man. That's my C.A. throne. You're gonna see his hat is like a shark's fin. You do that

I don't need that kind of heat This does it's cool. I like our new home. I'm happy here. I'm happy here, too But I don't want to get used to anywhere. It's cozy. Yeah, it's cozy. It's like we're playing for it We have fog when we have lots of nudity in here. I feel like there's fog windows Do you remember when they used to have to put up stuff because people were getting naked? You want me to get naked? Buddy, all I'm saying is you can get naked. That's what I'm saying. There was one episode where Jacob and me were holding up trash cans

to cover the facts in the window. Yeah, was that the lap dance episode? That was one Ari. Well, no, that was two to the minute. That was the Ari one was one Ari went and just tried to slap his dick against the window and Jacob was pulling on him for real. Please stop, Ari. Yeah, you're grabbing at his leg. He walked in with his dick. He took his dick against the window and Jacob was like pulling on him like for real like please stop. Yeah, you're grabbing at his leg.

He walked in with his dick. He took his dick out in the hallway and came in. He came in naked in the hallway. What? No clothes on in the hallway. Took it like shoes off. Everything. He didn't have any shoes.

Yeah, I think it socks on. It's socks is risky because that's almost like putting on ice gates. Did you go to the bathroom and take it all off? No, you just like you strip that he's walking what ice gates do you go to the bathroom and take it all off? No, just like He stripped outside the door Complete you know that he's got that fucking Jack Jack ass gene where he just hears that music in his head and he does something Yeah, cuz that Holocaust body where just slides off. Yeah. Oh my god. It's a grappling a fucking greased up pig dude slide right out of you greased up pig dude slide right out of you. Sweet.

Sweet. So we had Justin come in today. We asked him to stay for the first half of the show. Have you told him any of this on him bows? No. You weren't tipped off at all? I swear to God I wasn't. This made the rounds.

Now I'm anxious. I got text. No, now I'm anxious. You're fucked dude. You see, do you have it? He just got cough anxious. What if a police officer's like I'm gonna You speak to you over here and I'm gonna own it whether I'm embarrassed about it. Oh, I know

You know, it's funny. It's part but oh Dude let's pump thing. Yeah, so I get texted. I get texted this picture 700 times the other day when I wake up Very fun heavy exaggeration, but plenty of people texted it. I see a thing, it's a picture of Justin. Yeah. Who looks like he's fucking letting that a slow fart. Oh.

This bothered you. No, it didn't bother me. It's just hilarious. What's hilarious about it? What's hilarious about it? Mike Fenoya, we had on the show years ago, did this. We may fall in a finale for it. I think you can.

I've done this every time we go on the road. Always funny, but this one called People's Eyes. It says, we're gonna be- Do you wanna know what my response text to James? Which it looks like you're opening for me? Yeah, it doesn't. I didn't even think about it like that. Justin, I text to James.

That's the way I write him on the things though. I wrote, I wrote, I wrote, I wrote, Jay, it's so cool Justin, something you close out of your show. You close for him. It's so fun. It says Justin Silver live, real big up top, biggest lettering Justin Silver live.

Yeah. In concert, West Palm Beach improv. Dates. The dates, W slash, not even a full width. Big J. O'Coursen. Not even a support. I'm surprised, I'm surprised it's even bugs you. It doesn't bug me me I think it's hilarious

I don't get what's hilarious about even that's what's funny. Yeah, you don't get what's hilarious about it If you showed me that I'd be like oh Justin Silver's headlining. Oh, I don't sometimes make it looks at sometimes it Looks like we're co-headlining because it'll be like his face my face Tommy Clevver's in silver. He's got a couple of goodies. The best bet I have both worlds. Go back, go, keep going down. There's other one. I do that whenever we're going somewhere.

There, right there on the left. We're there. If you are in here, are you on one of the, no. No. No, Albany. Here, when we were in, that's you and me in Albany on the bar. That's funny too.

Who gives a fuck? Is this funny? This is funny because it does look like it's like it's a very misleading. Yeah. Awesome thing it is because if you go on the website by tickets, it's your thing. Yeah, but I would be confused if I was like, I am Justin Silver then you're like, well, who's picked J.O. Chris? Who am I? Who does it know that? People. People are dumb dumb dude. It looks like time permitting big J.O. That's how you do it, Chris. That's how you do it Chris. That's how you do it Chris. That's how you do it Chris.

I'm gonna give this young up a tummertime. This is time after me. J.O. You want a little stage burn? You want to do A? You know what? Why don't you go in here? Does it bug you? It does it swear on my life. It doesn't bug me. I just... What will you say? I know for a fact that it does not bother me at all. I just think it's funny. We think it's very funny

I got it. I got it. I don't know. I don't think it's him. Bowie. It's shades of him It's pretty fucking hilarious dude. Fen way I would do that. Fen way I would do just like that with the Albany one He was like gonna be an uncle's Phil's Connecticut. There is again. There's us in Syracuse. Yeah, part of it. Yeah. That's what it was. Like part of his tour and it didn't say anything about was like opening for God free. Yeah, that's what it was. It was like God freeze weekend. For no, it was like how to tour name and it was like part of it was him opening for God. You know what?

It's just can I say his name is not on the last two. So it doesn't. Yeah, there's no room for the first. You know, there's no room for him on those other ones. You specifically it was it was abs or my name. two. So it doesn't. Yeah, there's no room for him on those other ones. Yeah, specifically it was it was abs or my name. J, if you don't name your next tour time permitting time permitting time. You know what it is? He's trying to do my part. I'm trying to do my part. What part? What do you mean? Tell some tickets, I'm trying to do my part.

I understand unless when Jay's name is not, more when Jay's name is not on there at all, but you put with, with J.O.G. or something, with him. No, no. Doesn't come off like that. You know what, for the way I look at it, it'd be awesome.

I look at it at the opposite, like I'm with Jay on it. That's how I look at it. It looks like sidekick, J.O.G. Does it? And now I feel really bad Justin do it never change I always said that I Didn't realize that Justin was p-ditting me all these years So I've never done it with you and me dad. Yeah, you did did I silver ocherson one night only Oh, I know I'm I feel bad two legends sharing

two late one night Who will bring it harder now I feel bad don't I mean you Josh had a Myers like when He was setting it to me. He did it first and then he just kept sending me descendingly Like or ascending like this larger pictures of Justin's face like zooming into the system that's really just the micrphone is like and and that's shitty no it's just if it's an over-time i'll tell you there's people there's people who would absolutely

get irate about that for sure but i know you but i know it's would not like that if zack was to say like zack zack and me go live one night only goes Yeah, Lewis would lose it shit. I spawn my life. I just like and there's I'll I would figure you tell me I'll be if say that's what I'm saying you tell other you tell you yeah We found it funny enough to post the radio. We saw it was a last Thursday or something everybody saw it So we've been sitting on it all weekend. I've talked to you several times.

It's not a thing. It just makes me laugh, dude. It's such a funny thing. It would be out for a tell. I would like, dude, it's like everyone, David Tell, because I'm getting open for David Tell and the thing. It was like Twitter. Last time I would do something like that,

it was like Twitter on my own. But like it was always like a thing, you know, a tell or something like that, like a little bit of sure of me. That's so, it's so, it's so, it's like, it's not now, it's getting very funny. It's like if you worked at an office and you thing like, you know, a tell or something like that. Like a little bit of a deal of meat. That's so it's so. Justin, it's like it's like it's not now. It's like it's getting very funny. It's like if you worked in an office and you're like, guys, I'm doing happy hour this Friday. They showed up. It was my birthday party.

I'm like, what are you guys doing? You guys are like, oh, I'm just it. And I'm like, I, it's my, I don't know. I did Justin, Justin's at my birthday party, but I don't know who you people are. All right. And second banana banana big J No, what was the first thing you said what was the first thing?

I'm permitting time permitting did side car ochers If you guys don't mind my big silly friends gonna come up here afterwards you guys want to talk to a big dumb Tommy's gonna ask you some questions while you pay your bills you gotta pull the sheet off me like a Joe praider You got to pull the sheet off me like I'll show pray to pray to you You just everybody Jay That's about for everyone Pounds forward lighting a cigarette God that sucks

It's funny No, it's very funny It is funny but that's not It's not the unholyhious It's a knee scrape It's a knee scrape It's like you guys Justin Silverluck, that's the best above.

Just the silverluck. Four are, do you remember that for Dan? That's what we're saying. No, you're talking about when you did it for, um, God-free. Do you remember when you did it for Jay and Denver where it was like, I think he was headlining like a Wednesday Sunday? Yeah, he's doing the wraparound week. Yeah, man, it was like very late.

Friday Saturday at this guy in jail. By the way, Friday Saturday show up, I'm probably just going was like very late. Friday Saturday at this guy named Jail. By the way, Friday Saturday show up, I'm probably just gonna do a little less time and have a guy going over it. I can do it in concert. Yeah, tripping through America tour, Daddy-O. Yeah.

Woo. I'm gonna name the tour J gets to follow me. Yeah, please. Just lean into it, dude. Be like, no one you're bringing me to feature that I'm headlining. Yeah, mystery headliner tour. Yeah Two, yeah, we got a name your you're to we have to now we have to have a Justin Silver tour name for sure

That's fucking great. I think I'll also featuring And it's just me opening you could name your tour Justin Silver with big jailcerson small Justin Silver with with big jay ocherson tour That's fucking great. I mean do that for the dates. I'm not with you as a funniest I'm on the with big jay ocherson tour because sometimes I'm with jays and times I'm not he's always with I'll do it I'm with Dan. Yeah, dude. Do it. I think that's so funny I don't think I'm one of the ones who was that I was like silver. Oh, okay said If I wanted the ones it was that it was like silver. Oh, okay said

Great it was great, but I fucking love that but yeah, I got like at 78 people 70's X-Men. I guess. Oh, it's very sweet of you. Oh, that's comforting. It's very Comfort that won't wake me up tomorrow morning at 4 30 in the morning. You know, I'm not a fan, Justin Everybody was talking about you behind your back. Where they? That's you can't do that to poor Justin. It was a funny thing. They were all laughing at you It was I Made me laugh so hard right so I'm just over live. Oh nice Wait, oh, oh, maybe he's doing like the alternate days or something get in there and I look at goes with big Oh, that's nice. I'm gonna be there

Dude, I've know so many people that have done it so don't Dylan didn't even get a nod Dillon's on the show too Dylan's hosting. Oh, yeah, he even get a you's on the back and I guess and also There's a QR code. Did it scanned and Dylan? I'm the big I'm the big bear Jew you guys aren't getting like regular Jew just into mus sleep you yeah, you're like doing's the emo June more like the Italian flare Jew And then you know Dylan's got like that Push up oh for sure And then Jay's got fucking got the Rocker pair Jew Yeah, yeah, get over here. I'll fuck all those big fat tattoo titties you guys don't want a slice of

Yeah, you guys get like renegade Jewish women. You had West Palm that is gonna be an older crowd. Yeah, there's still and wearing hearts on West. So there's hotties in West Palm. I would see the, really? No, yeah. West Palm? No, not you. He's like, really?

What's? Hot chicks in Florida? By the beach? West Palm, I know, I don't, West Palm. Damn, do you hear that West Palm beach? Justin thinks your girls are ugly. But what's the one, we said West Palm I know I don't West Palm damn you hear that West Palm Beach Justin thinks your girls are ugly But what's the one we said West Palm and then there's Palm Beach is the one where Epstein got all his garbage young girls from right? That's team recruited women like colleges get

Trailer park communities You go to Florida you want them thick you go to Ohio. He just he didn't have a sense of we have to spread the word. It was like, yo, for 200 bucks, you can like go massage. Just guy, maybe she's a massage. Maybe you got to jack him off.

But also if you hold out, he'll just keep giving you money. Also, he is the CEO of Barclays. It'd be cool. Also, keep your mouth shut. This is gonna go bad for us. It's gonna be president anyways. Because that's like Uncle Eddie.

It's like all the one that got arrested Uncle Eddie and Philly, all the people that would just go there and give him underwear or pee in front of him to get money. We're like, oh man. No, I gotta get a job. I'm just getting paid for pee in front of this guy. He would give him 200 bucks. That's a lot of money.

No, that was the start. Yeah, for a trailer park girl, dude. You know how many fucking baby Ruth bars that is? That's a lot, two hundo. You know what You can fucking sugar up. Yeah sugar the fuck you go get a four-local and a hundred grand candy bar Oh, yeah on that show I started that show 60 days in I told you and I'm not steep in it my one season three I love it on episode one there was a or season one there was a hymn bow named Robert I don't know if you can find this Christine. What channels is a and eight. Oh, it's so you haven't seen it It's great. It's actually very popular. I'm finding it as I watch it. Is this the one where they all go to jail?

Civilians. Yeah. Yeah for a crime. They did not commit. No, no, they have to have a backstory It's all it's like it's a spy on the jail basically, but from the jail the jail is putting them in there. Two people know only and the production knows but they so they don't know who the other actors are. Nope. No, they do because they find out they sometimes they find out. No, no, no, no, no, Jay, you're forgetting. In the beginning, maybe they only do some later seasons, they're all in a room together. Not all of them. Not all of them. They take them in groups and they train them separately and they try not to have them cross paths.

Yeah, I'm angry I'd be a fire in prison. And this guy's like, I'm an actor. I'm an actor. But they're not actors. I'm a fucking killer. He's doing like website story knife fights with you. They're not actors. I'm sorry, excuse me, I need to do my breath.

I'm like, I burned a family alive. I got this fucking puss. They're not actors at all. I thought of you so much, how much you would have laughed at this. I'm like, I burned a family alive. I've got to listen to this fucking pun. They're not actors at all. I thought of you so much how much you would have laughed at this. I was alone watching. I think it's season three, but there's a guy who's like, he's a, what a reform advocate for prison reform. Prison's aren't working.

And this jail there in season three is in Atlanta. It's where you get those lockdown cells with two bunks in them. Okay. You know, low bunk in a high bunk know, a low bunk in a high bunk, yes Robert. Low bunk in a high bunk. And this guy's on the low bunk, the civilian. Sure. He's trying to read and he's just got a guy

who's like a no-ing running around. Like his guy's got face tattoos and he's just like, he's out of his mind, he's crazy. And he just keeps like blowing bubbles out of the shampoo bottle and going like I'm blowing bubbles out of my Peter I'm blowing and then it does a thing like that's crazy you start violence in jail because you're annoyed yeah and then and then it does like three hours later and the guy's like he's just saying something else more like that he goes you know like the bubbles

the bubbles in the Peter and then it's like three hours later and it shows him just like rip an ass in the cell and then it's just like three hours later And he just even his top bucket night vision just pull his butt cheek apart and go Man keeps coming back on me. You see the guy underneath like cover himself with his blanket It's so funny being put in there with crazy and you're a part of this experiment You know, I was rather being there with with violent. The crazy thing in later episodes is when they start airing 60 days in the jails. So the prisoners start suspecting,

and they mail every time. Oh, you got that. Well, in season three is when they start going, like, you know what I'm 60 days in, motherfuckers, like they know. They, of course, they know. It's an unbelievable show. Do you think jails,

do you think, here's my question, do you think jails across the country all the prisoners are doing that yes yeah of course so everywhere they're like you want them sixty day like they watch this they have if they have if there's no blame people that that aren't yeah for sure of the question or the guy they don't like that what do you a sixty day in and sure they're saying it in these jails that they're filming but like other ones the show can't last the not gonna be able to last very long without making it go by all robotic camera,

because if you are in a jail now, and they go, we're doing a documentary about inmates. Right. You're like, now there's just 60 days in and several people in here are there. And they figured it out by the fact that it's like, oh, these guys always get called for the interviews. Can I ask, do they?

What do you call, they're good at that. They call everybody else. Do these actors snitch on people in the jail? Yeah. Fuck that, fuck that, that's fucked up. That's kind of like what the three dances of their going in is like they're supposed to figure out what's wrong, like what's corrupt.

But also say like, but also say like the, there's getting dirt on inmates. No, but also the same like the CEOs are like bringing in drugs. That's why I was gonna ask you the CEOs in the prison. I thought they were burying the inmates more. No, it's by the way it turns out he fucking did do it. Well, it's not burning. It makes so much. It's burning. It's they're burying the system of he says not the inmates. They go. They're getting it through laundry. The trustees are bringing it in through laundry like they're finding out how

the drugs are getting in. Man, you'd be mad if you had smokes coming in a certain way in a fucking TV show costume. Sorry, dude, I can't get you cigarettes or your nudies. The best ones are the ones where the plants or the actors become like barn boss. You know what I'm talking about? They become, you know, like, remember bad boys. It's like, the dude were like,

it's like when they become like barn, and then they start getting like way into it. They're like, I've run this, from all the f**k. Like, did they get to into it? Yeah, they want it. That you're later they're having Capuchino and West Hollywood and he goes, you know what's crazy? I was running the

D block. They're so mad. And a superman. Well, this is season. I had some dangerous motherfuckers doing my bidding. This is season one. This guy, and you can play a couple of seconds at best to Robert. It's going to be audio. He is a jerk off to the 50th degree. You remember this guy at all Jacob you watch show I never heard this guy he did the whole like I can't wait to go and he's like it's gonna be a meditation retreat I'm gonna give you his trajectories

You can follow along when you hear these things he went in there for two days He was in the cell everyone was planning on beating the shit out of him Everyone was planning on it everyone in the cell, everyone was planning on beating a shit out of them. Everyone was planning on it. Everyone in the jail. Everyone in his pod was like, yeah, we're definitely going to beat this motherfucker. Probably reason. When you watch that back, you're like, oh, man. So then he goes, he fucks with the camera. He fucks with the camera. Just like put something over it because he knows it's going to get him in trouble and he gets sent to segregation. And he's in there for a month. and they go to him every day and he's like, I love it here.

It's red it the foods great. I get commissary. I'm getting fat and I'm working out. He's going to the dumb shit. And then they come in and they go, Hey, man, I think we got all the info we could use from you from segregation. Like we got to get you back in the general pop and he goes, hmm, he goes to go, yeah, we're going to send you back tomorrow.

He goes, cool. And then he just immediately starts hitting the floor saying he's like constipated and got some stomach pains. And then he has to go, well, man, it's, it's bummed me out because I really wanted to finish. But I think I got it because if you leave, you're out. Yeah, you can't. So he has to go to the hospital. So they had to like do the whole release.

So I'm taking him to the hospital thing. And they were like, they said it was nothing. It's weird. And it was nothing. He's like, huh, that's crazy. But anyway, I got a call back for the CW show. So I'm not doing prison acting anymore. Do the CEOs hate him?

I'm not acting like prisoners anymore, sorry. The people who know that they're running the show, the sheriff and his deputy, the two people in this just, do you have no, don't like it? I know what I'm saying. Can I say, tell you right now though, it is pretty cool to have a beef with the sheriff and the deputy.

God damn right. But why can't say, tell you right now though, it is pretty cool to have a beef with a sheriff and a deputy. Goddamn right. But I can't wait to get to season like I have to float around with your name. That's pretty fucking cool. But I'll tell you what man, they shoot the girls. They fight, scream, and just fuck each other nonstop. They can't wait to get naked in front of each other and shake their big awful bodies around.

And I was scolded in 2012 when I wanted to sell fucking Lady Jail, the cinematics. around and I was scolded in 2012 when I wanted to sell fucking lady jail the cinematics. Lady Jails I got a hot sexy Convict. Girl jail. There was so many movies like that on Skin and Max when I was John. I know. Girls in jail and always be like savage slugs. Serrardi. I'll tell you they really got easy on slush crime. If you watch if you watch jail movies and you're like, all these sluts out here cause all these crimes. I realize I'm

watching skin and max recently that I don't want to have that kind of sex. What you don't want a woman to ride your ribcage? I have very daytime outdoorsy shit nor daytime. Also you got to fill it. You you gotta fill a humidifier Three of those bad boys all blue light blue light silk sheets you gotta have your hair done the whole time My ass no one even looks like that no one's like there's nothing ever primal bad It's always just like doing yeah, yeah, I mean I I used to love it But now when you grow up you're like it's not practical. You wouldn't hear like it's like the eye touch myself video Yeah, you want to be like a snake squeezing something to death coming. Exactly. Oh

It's happened. Oh Yeah, not that one where you're where you're fucking a where do you want it's coming? It's happening where they're both where they're both riding Perfectly and then the next scene is them and in like a dress pants They always look nice the scene immediately slow down. They smile also. It's always them leaving like a dress pants. They always look nice. The scene immediately. At the least five. That's what they smile also. It's always them leaving like a columned house. Everyone's hair is fine.

Perfect. It's perfect. Yeah. So thank you for not messing up my hair when we fucked. Is this Robert? This is the guy that should have got to beat up. So he never gets beat up. No, he's in jail for like a day and a half.

I don't think any of them ever get beat up. They could protect them, right? No. In this very first season, also, a guy, you watch a guy keeps giving away his psych meds. So other people can do him his drugs and start to lose his mind slowly. And start telling everybody one of the civilians that's in there is a child molester. He's a TV told me this guy's a child molester. He keeps saying it over and over.

And you just watching this guy walk around saying it didn't listen and while this fat shlobby idiot. This is one of the funniest things about it. This is what got me into the show was this guy. He wants to be a corrections officer. It's his dream. He's a small security officer now and he's Paul art. He's chup. Yes. He's chubby. He's nervously terrified. He's a shlobby-duffy guy. His name's Jeff This guy Ricky is off his psych meds and telling everybody's a molester. And when this fat dummy's just sitting there, hit on his pillow one day, Ricky just goes over and slugs the choice in the face.

And he gets like, Ricky, I didn't do nothing. I didn't think he's swinging like in circles, like trying to get hit. And he's still like, but when he was out, like when they did the last two episodes of the season, when he's out and has to come back for like the reunion, you know, what happened. He was like, yeah, because everyone was wrong. I just can't be like a tack, but I mean, you know, like that if I wasn't like laying down, like that would have been a whole different story. Like, like, I, I, I was terrified and didn't know what to do. And then left and he goes, I'm leaving here. You left immediately. So it's like, it's, it's real, no, they get attacked absolutely. People try to do the one, people, I've seen people leave

because they're like right away, guys are like, lick him his ear and he's like, all right, all right, that's enough. And he's like, he's like, guys, I don't know, they got something in for me. And if they want you out really fast, what they do is they call you bitch. And if someone calls you a bitch and you don't fight,

you better just ask to leave. Oh, it's such a hassle. It's such a hassle. It's such a hassle. It's such a hassle. I want Louis to fight every day. I want Louis to go and mess and do it. I wouldn't, here's the reason I wouldn't do it, it's because I won't let, they show these guys.

Because you won't live a life of violence anymore. You swore that to Christine under that waterfall six years ago. This isn't a tough guy thing at all. It's the opposite of a tough guy. It's your mother hands you in. Christine gave me this, Christine gave me this pendant. I can't fight. I'm not your mother hands you in. It's Christine gave me this pen. Now Christine gave me this pen. I can't find it.

I got a kid to the sky. I got a kid to the sky. Sorry baby. Daddy's got to go to work. He tears it off and Jake goes, oh you fuck on. No, because that guy, the guy that left because he got hit, they were already where they were getting him too when he was at the commissary thing like it's a kiosk now. And while he's doing it, I love kiosks.

People are coming over his shoulder and being like, oh, you're giving me these, just pushing buttons for stuff they want. And he goes, Do they do the finger on the temple and the push though? No, no, they're just, they just, they just bully through just doing it. It's like it's like robbery by like, you know,

hey, why don't you give me your wallet and it's like you're afraid you're like, wow. It's, you know what it is, it's old school, let me ride your bike. Yes, absolutely. Can I tell you something? So they start putting my bike out stolen like that when I was a kid. Yeah, that's why I see a lot of people That was a common move. Did you think you were the only person that I thought I was the only person in this room that that happened? I never happened. I got my bike stolen. My bike got stolen out of my garage

Yeah, my got stolen in my dad drove me my dad was dropping me off from a weekend I told him what happened hey drove me to the kids house To your bike back did he set it up? He set up the fight in the front yard Oh, you drove me to it. You just drove me to his front yard and he's like knock on the door. Yeah, I was you do Publicly to come outside. He just gave it back like he was just like he's like oh you got me. Yeah I think it was like nervous that I showed up with my dad to like yeah do dad showing up. Dad's.

I mean I don't know but I've heard. My uncle smacked my uncle smacked the kid that I got into a fight with like third grade. Let me just I don't want to get lost that when he was doing that taking that commissary thing like that. Trust me. That was the thing I took and said was like if someone's picking things on that kiosk or if I'm picking someone to get and someone pushes the thing, I'm not going to, I'm going to push his hand away or then like, you know, take the thing off and be like, nah, dude, but so I'm not that guy, but I'm going to get fucked up.

Yeah, because there's going to keep tormenting you until the end. Yeah, and I don't want to get scared. I'm gonna fight the biggest guy. There's a lot of people in jail who will kick my ass for sure. For the few, maybe I do okay against these guys are just like hard and do. You know what I mean? So I'm like, it's that I'd be afraid to go in because I'm like, I'm gonna get. I'm gonna stick up for myself, but I don't even want to have that one fight.

I don't want to. Doesn't make sense. You have to have the one. I'm you stick up for myself, but I don't even wanna have that one fight. I don't want to. It doesn't make sense. You have that the one. You have that one. No, someone's saying, if you get bitched, I would think you'd have to have the one, and that's it. Yeah, some people go in and it's just like.

They just run over them. Yeah. I don't understand that they're not actors, but what is their motivation to go in? Different reasons. Everyone gives different reasons. Some people are like, I used to be a CO, I wouldn't see people the other side. Some people's like want someone was like my daughters in jail for 10 years

I want to see what she's going some some people are like philanthropists and they're like I want a better the system Yeah, I'm gonna show expose how bad guys do interview one guy goes but fucking RIP roaring non-stop. I want hardcore criminal butt fucker Guy on guy guy on guy nuts to butts. I want a man that is incarcerated Fuck my ass. Have they had a gay guy on that? I'm sure But I may be not see my that's too will as he's gonna go on there is a big oops I'm sure, but I may be not say my that's too will is gonna go in there is a big oops Fan I wear the I know where the blind spots of the cameras are boys. Oh Latin Kings. Oh, why we make it the Latin Queen

Move it, sister. Oh Do you want to watch him get hit? Oh, yeah This is a guy was like she's lucky. I was laying down, so I'm gonna fuck them up. You know what I'm doing? What the fuck? You're getting it for the cop! We never put it right in, do not say it! Oh, that's like a Jeff? I was doing it for the cop! Yeah. You know what the fuck?

He's like, what I didn't do nothing. He's like, ah, guys, so lucky. It's like, why? You have nothing but opportunity right now to do anything. No one does need for it. I like that he's an old-timey PJs. What's with it out of the bonfire? I was talking to my aunt.

At the bonfire, I said, SSSF. He's like, how many guys? I mean, the first place. Because off my glasses, the bottom of our SS SSS sf g. I'm just going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice.

I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice.

I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the face twice. I'm going to get in the a CEO. I know I can handle being a CEO. They saw me at a weird moment there because I was laying down like, Jeff,

I understand if you don't fucking work at produce at a grocery store. Can I ask you a question? This is not the precursor to becoming a CEO. You don't have to do this. In fact, I don't have to, they say. I think 99.99% of CEOs have never done this. Do you think this is like comedy school?

You're telling us that. Well, they don't say that's how you become a CEO because Do you think it's like comedy school? Yes, that one. Well, they don't say that's how you become a CEO because I said it's one of the reasons some people say this guy wanted to be a CEO. Yeah, there's a Marine. There's a Marine who just wanted to see if he can endure it. His wife went in to see what he went through.

I pop up on a season, I'm like, I'm mostly here for material. I just try to find what's going on. I kind of want some new bits. I think Louis should go in. Louis would fare well. That would be good for gas digital. Oh, everyone would be selling tickets.

I mean, I would be selling tickets for comedy shows. He's got, at least, going to do. He goes, uh, brought back poster dog this time. This time. I got another tattoo of the pen. Turns out Martin made some bad decisions. He's in here. Oh, man.

During the basketball game, I got him fucking do it Yeah, I would love for Louis do a little six years and bring up that Robert video again. I want to see if uh That's the guy who does well Whatever happened the Martin what ever happened to Martin Lewis is most trusty a sidekick. Yeah, Louis told me he took him to a farm-up state Put him down, you put him in their woods. Get out of here, you stupid idiot. Last time I checked, he moved up state. He just said I'm free. Why does Martin not work for Castigial?

You've got to go where I'm heartened. You might want to go and stop like white fan. Keeps coming back. It's the story about the wolf. You've got to go where I'm heartened. Justin, I don't want you to get a taste of this guy's personality because I want you to, because there's the thing he had, he's also, I think he might be a like a lunatic.

Mm-hmm. Like I think he's, he's a guy who looks like he's going to kill a girl or something. He's an art teacher for children. He's one of the creepiest men I've ever seen when he talks. He make the whole thing as a joke. I said he's like, it's like, oh, dude, it's great to be lazy in here and whatever.

And then I told you he left early, he faked an engine or faked a stomach problem so he can get out. And when he was at, he's like, I'm also a sculptor in his whole house. Is he's creepy sculptures he does? Very creepy. I want to see him.

And one of them, I'm looking to buy some stuff. One of them. One of them said tablet. Oh fantastic. One of them is like a 10 commandments tablet. Yeah. And it says the 10 rules of Robert and he acknowledges it

But you have to like pause to see what they are and I didn't get them all but it's he's guys are making rules Yes, but it no it's worth it's like if you want to be with him like a girl It's like no chewing gum's like number one. What it's only wackier. Yeah, sounds reasonable to make you go Dude, yeah, last time I checked spice girls got a hit off it No, no, you're either if you want to be my lover you got to get with my friends. That's what the rules of Robert are Oh, they're there. Oh, well get well give us taste of what the guys personalities first. Oh, there are the ten rules of Robert Someone put it on the that's great. Yeah, I had a feeling somebody would thank you Christine submission We'll knock it off that reddit. She likes hearing about herself. Do you have to go soon Justin? Yeah, like 45. Yeah Robert's turn inside deep hot. It's overcrowded and no for violence. Hey, what's up guys? I'm Robert. I do not go by Bob

Get it right away. They're like he's getting raped getting raped. That's his personality. Dude, that's an SNL sketch. Hold on, go back. He really just fucking opened up going, do you get the NFL that we're here? Do you know your first line? You've been rehearsing it in the fucking lost on the way over there, like a hundred times. Blood tastes salty, but revenge is sweet. Ah, fucking come on, man, do it better. You guys gonna do it on the work. I'm gonna open up with you guys got NFL no work. I just want you guys to know I love Assex and the white race. Save your time to forget, I do it poorly.

I'm here to be a white supremacist and not get fucked. I'll tell you also what I've learned about watching the show that I'd rather kill myself than do. And I mean kill myself. Community theater. No, and in fact, I would try to find a way to get in this segregation for my entire stay, because you really do have to shit in front of... Oh, yeah.

...at least one, but possibly three other people, depending on the jail. It's wide open. Wide open, and I mean, two feet from someone's face where they're sleeping, you have to drop a shit to that spot. That's crazy. If you bond, you can do the human squatty potty. That's where they take a knee and then you put your feet up on their knee. And then you can poop that.

And the opposite. You hold hands when you're in for balance. It's like yoga. It's like, yeah, they got to pull you up while you're sitting down. Is that yoga called? You lock in two person yoga. Why yoga? Sidekick, am what you say?

No, I was just saying it's also the opposite you're lying in bed And you have to smell the two smelly duties of these like monsters not if you're me. They're probably not eating right No, the food there is not right, but it's not just that. I'm saying also you wouldn't mind yourself sitting and taking a shit in front of three people Oh, no, I would That's a much bigger problem. If I really had to shit, I could get it done as opposed to someone else shitting in front of me, I'd be like, yeah, stop. You're right. I'd be way more grossed out by the app.

You know what I'm telling you, I don't know if I would be, I don't know how you get used to shitting well. That moment, it wouldn't even be the farts, it wouldn't even be the grunting, it'd be the moment you hear the poop slime out of them. No. Sounds like alien. When the aliens are coming out of the pods. Oh, it's the open noise stuff. Yeah, and then it falls out.

I guess you could just become like hardened Jay. Like five years in, you don't even think about it. Yeah, no, or it's like cast away where Jay comes home and he has to sit in the bathroom and Christine shits. Like the way that Tom Hanks lays on the floor with the light. That's like J and the bathroom with Christine when he comes home from jail. I got sit here and listen to someone. I gotta let it fall out of someone. Let's give take a little taste to this guy.

For you guys have had a film that work is so funny. I was not. I was not thinking it was going to be that. It reminds me so much of this guy. I'm going to say date dated for like two years in high school, but just what a slimy prick. Yeah, do play it. When I was getting interrogated,

it was awkward because they just killed grilling me and I remember my new detail. And my story, I did not say it in such a manner which was believable and I could tell Again, really suspicious of me. What do you hear for I'm serial killer? I know it's a stupid No, it's thing this he goes he goes. Yeah, I got pulled over to stop sign on like 84 or something said they go You guys go 84's a highway He's like you know the stop sign there. He goes. Yeah, but it was like No, it's there no that way no and, the stop sign there. He goes, yeah, but it was like, no, it's down there. No, no, it's these that stops on your fucking

stew. Why don't they close them through those fucking stories? Cause that, that's fucked the bunch of people up. They do. Go ahead, Christine, where they're you saw the cops talking to the cops hate them. It's, they should always give them the backstory of Connor. He should always have to be like, so I was a, are you just have to... What is he doing? He's like a shot Kennedy. So they...

So they put him in solitary confinement there. Get up. He's our guy. Some of these guys could be very dangerous individuals. Some guys were thinking I was a cop. That's a bad thing, right? Just so it looks like I'm not a cop. I started putting that towel from the camera.

Was that a good choice? No. A lot of you broke up placing something on a camera or tampering with our cameras is a very serious role. And you have received a thousand dollars. No, I was in proving. That was good. Yes, and?

You don't understand. I did some time at Second City. I get nervous when I do my vocal alarms. I don't want anyone watching me. I was about to do that. That's guy fucking stinks. I love it. I like him too.

There's one even great example. So how much of a douche this guy is. Thanks, Sam!