The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Top Gun Call Signs

Episode Date: April 21, 2023

If you were a Top Gun, what would your call sign be? Maverick? Goose? How about FITBIT??

Hey everybody, I'm Bobby Kelly. And it's Big J. Okerson. We're actually a full radio show on Series XM, not just the podcast. Hey, guess what? For full episodes of the Bond Fire, you can listen on the Series XM app. Go to seriesexm.com slash Bond Fire for a special offer. Hey, this is Kim Kongden and you're listening to the bonfire with Robert Kelly and Big J. Ogerson. Venmo me, pig bitch.

Oh, marry you right now. Big of you're us good. Good. This is terrible. I'm going to show Bobby Huss about whacking off look. Look at the innuendo. It's meat pies. What is that?

I'll be honest with you. I'm not sure what this part of the video is that but she's she's blasting off by herself in the car now you're on what what what are the cooks doing uh... i'm not sure what is she doing i was got this hell's angels pulled up in the motorcycles to the diner

well see every night in Thai blue jeans. In the pages of a blue boy magazine, by the way, you can see it's steaming, it's by her coach. She has an eating. I've been thinking of a new dumb, say same guy from the other video. I'm thinking of a good vibration vibration. That's a guy who left her in the other video. A good vibration vibration. That's a guy who left her in the other video.

Bob Shoe, Bob, sure. Probably your boyfriend at the time. Get back together. What? With a lion's roar. I want to go south and get me some more. Come on. Shoe's, This song stays.

Say that it's Titchin' Time, saves nine. They say a final stop. Or I'll go blind. Come on, dude. Mastervation. Bob shoe, Bob. Master Bingo. Shee-bops.

Peep-bop-a-wee-bop. High-bop-you-bop-and-they- bop high bop you bop and they bop yeah b bop She's adorable dude Let's see You don't see it huh? Is that a retarded people talk?

You don't We bop a boop a wee bop Skieb That's how Josh said in a Myers talk Skiebop Skiebop Skiebop Skiebop a wee bop

Where you from? She ain't with Dota, she's shy. I guess she was very face-y and all dumb shit, but I don't know why. I thought she was so cute. Rocky one. Yes. Take it to the zoo, rock. Her head boy George was at the same time. I just also think I was attracted to Boy George and then found that I was a boy. Dude, this is- I didn't get it by the name Boy, or George. I just also think I was attracted to boy George and then found that it was a boy

Dude this is get it by the name boy or George I just accepted those two words together made a pretty girl. I was very confused by it when I was little two You know, you know this video sucks when they go to cartoon halfway through Don't yeah, but I'm running down a dream Is that video suck that was cartoon that was through that that was cartoon all the way through How about aha one of the greatest videos and songs ever take on 100% but it was that the other one who did it first Huh, they did it first. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha And that was great animation, by the way. This is Gabbash. Do you know they're still famous in... Yeah, look at that. That's right, that's a little... Norway or something?

Great song. This is a good song. Do you know the part that he says super high, the words are in a day or two? No, really? It's so weird. It sounds like one, I thought it was always one word. I just blew Sarah's mind.

35 years later, I finally picked up on that because I read the because it yeah I heard the lyrics from the it's it's I'll be gone in a day or titty. I didn't know that either. Yeah. You can go to that part. It's a good song. Yeah. It's girl could have been hotter for what the role was. What girl? Her? Yeah. I like her. been hotter for what the role was. What girl? Her? Yeah. I like her.

She's very European. She's very 80s actually. She's got a little space between her teeth. She's a banana clip hair. Yeah, I like her. Better than Sydney Lopper. Hey. Lopper head off.

I was like, guys, you with me? Okay. You with me, Jacob? Okay. Here's a, okay, Jacob. He's Jacob. Hey, give it a go. He's out of my, it was good.

It was good. It was good. Why this guy all by the way this guy always looks wet when they show him actually him. Oh that guy. Yeah, you know the whole band's got like a sheen on them. Yeah, I don't know what it is Is that stuff that Kim Kardashian spreads their face with the Christine makes me put on? That's a great video. That's awesome. I'll be calm. What is this? In a day or two.

None of us hit that. Well, we're missing our fifth part, Harmony Sarah. Yeah, Sarah. Oh, sorry guys, I'm sorry. God, do you even want to be part of this show? Do you want to be in this bit? Do you want us to move to Nashville? Oh, not.

Come on, join me. Do you want us here full time? Yeah. Always. She does say she friends with everybody. Why does he have a plumbers wrench? Who the cops? Who just carries her plumbers wrench around?

I don't know. Who's chasing him to the 13 on their hat These cops don't make any sense Yeah Well, this also again this maybe that's what cops look like in sweet they're from Sweden or something like that And I heard they're still popular wherever they're from better song than Cindy Lauper Who is a great song? This is Jay Cindy

If you're a one hit if you're a one hit, if you're a one hit wonder, you shouldn't be able to go up against like a Cindy law person like that because what she has is the test of time. It's always going to be subjective. The test of time. She's got multiple hits. Yeah, in a time frame. Ah ha, couldn't fart out what the biggest song in the world. They couldn't fart out one more song on the radio. They have another song, that's hot. I don't think people care about Cindy Lopper, like the way people still care about like Madonna

or share, like any of that. Apple's in oranges. Christine. You're saying? Madonna and Cindy Lopper are apples in oranges, that's crazy. You're crazy. It's not. I'm with Christine on this.

They went into a whole different guy. There's Madonna's way more successful. Yeah. Yeah. Madonna is way more successful. Of course. Yeah. I mean, they're both like 80s weird girls. Yep. Okay. Sorry. I'm going into the arena X but I like the artist. Yeah, listen Dude Cindy Lomp, but why can't you just take it that she's she's whatever she's not Joan Jette. He loves it She's a crush on her. Joan Jette is She's not Joan Jat. He loves it. That's a crush on her.

Joan Jat is the test of time. Still rocking, still singing. And she had a bunch of hits and she was with two different bands that were amazing. Cindy Lompard. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What? You're saying crazy shit. What the knife away, Jay?

No, I can't until you admit what you just said was crazy. Say it's crazy. We put the knife down. Say it's crazy. Sarah, can we put this thing away? We can say we can end this whole thing right now. We just say it's crazy. Joan Jett. Yes. A 100% of her hits, I believe, hits were covers. Yeah. Other people's music. She actually was not a very good guitar player. She had a unique voice. It was the thing I like Joan jet awesome. I like Joe iconic. She has stood the test of time. Yep. No more than

Cindy Lauper Cindy Lauper songs were stupid your The scooped up The doop are the goonies not good enough for you because that's the song the goonies are good enough Bobby doesn't care about the goonies at all. I listen first of all the goonies means something to me is my lawyer Yeah, our lawyer is sure okay our lawyer is junk so I love the goonies, but I am not a fucking I'm not a I'm not a I'm not gonna wear a goonie shirt. I don't know they ask you to but the goonies song I'm not gonna wear a goonie shirt. I don't, you know. No, they ask you to, but the goonie song.

Wait, I feel like the goonies need a lot to you. Yeah, yeah, the goonies met a lot to me. Go to the chorus. Yeah, because it's like, generate, I feel like you was past your time. Hey, I'll read the things better when he puts them in paragraphs. Ha, ha, ha, ha.

Are you drinking milk? Oh, come on. Give me a little less. I find too hard to break. You feel some musical Nashville. Good enough. Good news. Oh, wait, not the good news yet.

It's good enough for me. Goody Jett. It's good enough for me. Ay, ay, ay, ay, ay. Jets. The young city lawper does have a little bit of Kathie Lee Gifford, but. I will say she wasn't rocking a killer ass. She's adorable. She's not adorable.

Okay, fine. You and Christina Sarah think she's a ugly pig. I don't agree. Okay, this song is not good. This song's great. It's got too much going on. It's going to have to gain gain, boom, boom, boom, it's ggging, it tout out. That's hilarious. That's our manager. That is so funny. That's our lawyer. Our lawyer. I mean, look, I get it, the song song the movie You kind of like it because of that the movie okay fine, but it's not if if I'm not gonna pick this song to put on a playlist

What I'm okay, let me shake my microphone on Sarah. Is it on yeah? Okay, great I'm not gonna pick this to put on a fucking playlist That was a real question you were just making me feel like an asshole. Oh, J. Was that good? Does that make you feel better in yourself? I feel bad. I feel terrible.

I don't like when your cum lashes flicker like that. You never get, you never get see my eyes red from cum. Nope. Oh my god. Why is, now it looks like Rady Rady Piper's involved. Oh, yeah, that's right. Yeah, Cindy Lauper brings the wrestlers. Yeah, she went to wrestling. Yeah, there's the iron she can everything. They'll pull that card and nickel. I've all cough. Yeah, she really brought

them up. And are you aware of? You know that I watched a lot of documentaries and say, Cindy Lauper is actually quite responsible for the growth and popularity of W.A. When she got into wrestling, got all excited, and she started bringing the wrestlers over. I don't remember this. They started doing wrestling shows on MTV. Yeah, I remember that. Like a couple of Sunday night wrestling

or what's in it on the wrestling was on MTV. And that crossover made MTV like a cool or a WF like a huge WF fell off after Superfly and kind of died. Then the Hulk brought it back with Andre and then it was dying again and then MTV and them and Lou Albano. Yeah. They brought it back. Yeah.

And she was in WrestleMania. Yeah. Yeah, that was great. I mean, she was good at WrestleMania as like, you know, a little weird girl wrestling, but she's not. I mean, that song is not a good song. I mean, it's not Christine. Am I crazy? I bet she was fun. Christine. Christine, I know you love Jay. Look at me. I love Jay, but I'm not I'm not a big fan of Cindy law by the way by the way They just if you go back in this video a little bit when the the Asian guy said Cindy lawper they it's this would be canceled right now Watch right here. You go Cindy Lupa They actually write it out His goofy Asian accent really classy Freddy Blassy look at these people For you is good enough. Routy, routy point from the iron chic.

Yeah, right here at the Hibachi joint. It's good enough for me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Where'd they say it, Goddamnit? Yeah, it's like enough for me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, where they say it God damn it. Yeah, so the loopah is like six Habachi chefs. Yeah, it's too much of a machi chef. And they wrote loopah. Our pants stink. Joe de Rosa dresses like Cindy Lama.

Oh, you're a little sickening fucks. Yeah, you do. You fucking, you fucking asshole. Same pants. So the roasted dress is like, don't sit you off her. I just sucks. There's nothing worse than a zany bitch. Oh, God, that really called me.

She is zany. Oh, her stupid bracelets. Too many bracelets, man. I like a lot of bracelets. I'm really, really poor right now. That's nice, but she has like 75 rubber black bracelets. Remember that was in? I have 75.

You have three. She's just too tough and very fun. What? She's the up. She's not fun. No, when we met. She's all fun. She's talking about when you met her She did not enjoy my humor

Why don't I stick it up for her so much, you know it? She's a piece of shit. Yeah fuck her man. She walked out on you, dude She walked out on you dude Sarah's still here Sarah you're still here. I'm here. Yeah, I think you're contractually obligated to but Still nice the are you know you do the good job here. Yeah, I think you're contractually obligated to, but still nice to y'all, you know, you do the good job. That's a good trouble if I left, of course. Good. I'm sorry, but you know,

it's just got my right tomorrow, Sarah. First of all, to be funny, Sarah's not here tomorrow because she's just like, uh, now they just get some grumpy old guy who's been here since it started. My lawyer is going to be crawling up your guys' asses.

Okay. First of all, your lawyer was in the goonies. No. Hard lawyers in the goonies. That's great. I think Brendan Frazier thanked him when he got his Oscar. He did? Goonies never die.

Was it Brendan Frazier? No, it was the Asian kid from the goonies. It was one of the Habachi chefs. He did I was I thought maybe he was that Asian kid the one that was in everything everywhere all at once. Did you like that movie? I didn't watch that bullshit. Oh, he did I did. You love it. I did not love it. I People say it sucks actually. I wanted I wanted to like it a lot. It was it was very similar to was that Fred green tomato tiger dragon no No, no, but closer I'm trying to think of other Olympia to caucus movies joy look club

No, you're talking to cold cold cold. Break into electric boogaloo. Closer hot hot hotter. James Bond never say never again. Hot. Okay, okay. No, he was hot. Yeah, he was hot. That was hot as James Bond. Yeah, that was not. Not even see her hot. Hot. The galaxy highway to the galaxy. Life is a highway by Tom Coffin. And you want to ride it all night long.

No, no, no, good song though. I take that song. Do you know every time, by the way, this happened twice in the past two days. Yes, you don't even remember it because I don't over rider about it now because I've given up. But every time it comes on, I ask Christine in the car when Luna ticked Fringe by red rider comes on. Yeah. You know that song, right?

Sure. I go, uh, who's singing this song, Christine? We go through this one every time. For some reason, this one always just does not want to get through her head. I go, the lead singer of, uh, red rider as a solo act saying what song and she just by almost every time at some point she goes we don't get here anymore because I just drop it. I ask him that I just shake my head and move on. But I used to go Christine. How did you know where she goes?

She goes, I don't know. You talking, I don't listen. I don't care. She gets so angry. What? I said I can't remember everything you say all the time. But just one you feel like would just like, you just eventually memorize like a phone number. That's two different things.

You said, or she said, you and you talking, I don't listen. She says, I can't remember everything. I always wear the guy, she said, the one time when she snapped, she goes, you talking, I don't listen. Wow, you said that. Yeah, you're not supposed to say that out loud.

I, yeah, I mean. No, no, she doesn't remind me she said it because I don't listen. He's not the only mean one. Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy. Are you reminded of your hitchhiker's? Yeah, did you see that? Yeah, I like, I love that book.

What? What remind you that adventures of babysitting? No. You think other people is a good guy? I forgot, though, anywhere, anytime, all the things at once. All the things at once and everywhere. Just a stupid name for a movie.

That there and that thing. The thing with the girl and the lady that turned into another lady. Hot dog fingers. It was very, it was very weird. It was very weird. I wanted to like it, but it was too much. They just did too much and it won everything.

I don't know how it won everything. Yeah, people were dumb. Top gun should have won. Top gun Maverick should have won best picture. I, do you should have cracked a Miller genuine draft after you said that fit it. Am I right? God should have taken the should have taken the sweep. Fitbit. Am I right? Are my wrong? What? Fitbit.

General top gun, right? Oh, Fitbit. It is though. Actually, Fitbit. I said I can want that as the call sign. What's it's good? It's such a good one fit. It's so good. It's perfect. Fit it is great. What was what was on you like sleeves sneezes? Lookers, jizz sprinkles. It's better one. Mittens. Disco about disco about can I be mittens? You can be mittens. I'm a lot of mittens. Yeah, I'm mittens. You have a good one for I had a good in the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle of the middle Highlight call sign highlight. I gotta get my hair highlighted. You gotta eat But you yeah, of course if you go to the movie you're gonna get highlights. Yeah, what's Christine again? I don't have one yet. Wait a head one. Chortle. Yeah, yeah Chortle, yeah, the noise the command of you. Would you feel any kind of emotion?

Like Like, eh eh eh. No, eh eh eh. It's out there. It's like a gun. I had one for Lewis. Is this guy? Is your crazy ex-boyfriend, sir? Is that the guy you're running from, New Hampshire?

Can you talk about a folks? Did he find you? Did he protect you? I need help right now. Is this sleeping with the enemy? Do you need Christine to protect you? Yes. I only trust Christine on this.

What's your actual name? That is you've since not Sarah. You've been hiding. I can't say her. Do you know Kung Fu? Yes, you do? Fifth degree black belt. No, not at all. Yes, but you're gonna throw a Chinese star. Wish you gone. I mean, oh, I was coming in. Oh, what's that? Oh, thank you very much. Hey, hey, I'll be look at that paragraph form. Oh, wow.

Hey, obviously look at that paragraph form. Oh wow Hey, Jay is actually talking to somebody right now came to the who is that that's Marcus He was helping us out last time we're here. Okay. He's gonna be here tomorrow when Sarah quits They call me a sky horse. They're just so impressed when she saw me know a black guy though. Do you see that? Pretty she liked it. Yeah, she said she's don't know, you're so cultural. And then I said word. She loved it. J's wearing a she her hoodie. For the kid rock show. And he's wearing pink. And I think she is the greatest outfit ever. Pink and purple. Pink and purple. She her. They can't say I'm not right sleeves sleeves.

Nope. No, coughs. I have the call sign that I came up with for Lewis and for Christine. But I do like, Jordan, Fitbit. What do you got? I have for Christine. Yours is actually in the same thing. House. I think it's a reluctantly.

Maddie. Yeah. It's not bad. Nanny. Yeah, because she has the same laugh. Lewis, I had the most difficult problem with because he's just a good dad. He doesn't have like quirks, but I came up with it. Call sign trees. Why trees?

Trees? I don't know what that is. Trees. Why trees? Why smoke? What? He's not identifying stoner. What about call exciting good dad? Come up with it. It's the only quirk I know about. He's a perfect dad. Jacob, I got to tell you though. I don't know if we call the one black person on our

team trees. He's like that. Well, also, it's a short king wants to be called trees because tall So there's a double meaning can I say something do you call short short king the short kings short king? That's a good call. So I'm short king short. Oh, short king. Yeah, he's a king short Short king and Fitbit Blue likes it you said you like it Lou. Chantix like short. Yeah Luke likes it you said you like it Lou? Chantix like it. Short hair. Chantix.

Chantix. Chantix is my favorite. Ever at all. Chantix. I forgot. Chantix. Chantix. Luke, you know what,

Lou is on Chantix. He warned me at one point. When we were on break, he almost hit us. Really? Yeah. Because of his butt. It was crazy. I perceived that it was making fun of my butt,

so I wanted to find out my mind. What he was saying, he was saying it was a nice round ass. I perceived that it was making fun of my butt, so I wanted to find out my mind. We were saying it as a nice round ass, and he was like, yeah, I wanted to fight you. Can I say something? I was like, for complimenting your sweet ass. I've gone along with the bit, but I've never seen it. Yeah, because it's not worthy of staring at you.

Hey, hey, I'm not saying I want to. I'm not saying I'm, I have to. I mean, I'm going to get mad at me, Chantix. Yeah. Make him turn around for you. I'm sure you're asked him. I've just never seen it. And I would think that someday you're going to catch it. Maybe we could go to the beach. No, we will need that. You'll walk down the hall one day. You'll just see how it like hugs, how like fills out the area. Yeah, but you always wear something over it. He's always hiding. You got to catch him without that.

Yes, we've now we've, he's now been shamed himself into wearing long flowing things and he won't walk ahead. Oh, maybe, maybe Jacob, you drop a hundred and down the hall. Oh, that'll make him bend over, all right. And then we'll film him. We'll come from behind. Oh, did you drop a pencil?

Oh, Bob, I just dropped a pencil Oh, oh We can't see it. We can't see I can't see dude look at look DJ lose to an old-timey radio He's just wondering outside I think I just broke my leg He goes oh, and then the horses came in. Here's a airplane going by. Yeah.

Yeah. So we got a big show tonight. We're going to do at the right. What is it at the right? What is the right one on the tour? Ryan, Ryan, We're gonna do at the Ryan. What is it at the Ryan? What is going on in the tournament? Ryan, Ryan, say it again. Ryan, Ryan, Ryan, which is an old classic theater. I believe it was a church.

It's not a very creative piece. Yeah, it was, right? It was a church that they turned into. You second year anniversary. And we're going out there. We're gonna do a show and Kid Rock. We don't know if he's going to be there. He's gotta be there.

But we're passing the mic. There's no host. He's not coming up between and saying the next person's name, which I will say in a lot of ways. I did it last year, so I got to hear Kid Rock announce me, which was neat. Yeah. It's kind of a bummer that he's not going to be announcing us. I think it's a bummer. And also, I have to, oh, I announce you, you're lucky because I'll it's a bummer. And also, I have to, oh, I, I announced you, you're lucky because I'll pump you up. Yeah. But whoever's announcing me, I don't know them.

I might get, oh, what's this guy's name? It's like a singer. So what's the, we're, we're in Christine. Well, kid Rodson out there. He's not, I don't, we don't know. I don't know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. That was sent us. We, we, they might not be putting them up there because of, you know, maybe, right? Maybe because it's called the Kid Rock comedy jam. You have Chris Porter right before you. Okay. I'll give you a good.

All right. I'll see. I mean, I don't know. I mean, I might not like me. Oh, he probably hates you. He probably hates my guts. Oh, you got to know you to love you. You did.

So we got that show tonight. And then we're going to party at Chris Rock Chris rocks not Chris rock at Kid Rock's house We're probably gonna party at Kid Rock's house. I'm gonna call him Chris rock all night And I'm also gonna keep constantly asking about the accomplishments of Chris rock as if he is also Chris rock I go live special balls to the wall dude. Wait a minute But you're here with that will Smith thing with class. Anyway, let's go shoot some training cans. I'm training can.

Anyway, can we go hunt black people on ATVs now? Ha ha ha ha ha. Sarah's Sarah just tapped out. That was Sarah's last thing. That was it. She hasn't been on a good ATV black guy hunt years. Yes. She got away from that world.

Yep. Since she was in Salem, the hampshire. Since she was in New Hampshire sure back when her old uncle What's his name Bernie? What's his name? Bernie Bernie Donlin. Bernie Bernie Sanders Bernie Sanders Bernie Sanders and her took him up and up in the fall by Lakewood, a Pesaki, right?

My rattlesnake hike. You know, any hunted ice tea? Yeah. That's a good movie. That was a good movie. Surviving the game. Sleeper. They redid it with, uh, what's his name? Uh, the, uh, Thor's brother.

They redid the movie. They, oh, he's not the, he's not the hunted though. It's the same thing that that gets hunted for a night. The one with iced tea was a great movie. Yeah, there was a racially charged element to the iced tea one. Yeah, but this one is set in contemporary where we don't like white guys. They hunt white guys.

Was it black guys hunting white guys? No, that'd be a good movie though, wouldn't it? That'd be way better. That'd be great movie. Oh, please. See an iced tea, fucking. Thomas Hiddelsen. Thomas Hiddelsen Thomas Hiddelsen the guy that was married to Uh, my little Cyrus or they yeah, Thor's brother. He was dated my little Cyrus

And he actually they broke up on like the red carpet because she was being a weirdo trying to lick him And he was like stop it you moron and he put her and they they caught it Really was is that our ex-husband? I think it's Liam. Liam. Liam Hemsworth. Is that his name? Yeah.

That's his name, right? I don't know. Liam Hems. Liam Hemsworth. You guys remember when she took that picture of her trick and it'd be her while peeing? No. That was ruled.

You never seen. Don't bring it up, Blue, because it's not cool to do to Sarah. She isn't necessarily want to watch Miley Cyrus peeing. I do. But I would love to see it. But if you could put some black point up in the back, that'd be great. Really black. Like sweaty black. Yeah, there's that picture of her that she's just taking a piss on the ground while she's drinking a beer. I never saw that.

Come on. I swear to God, I never saw that, but I did see her close your eyes and then actually do bring it up somebody. Did you see the guy from America's pie? P on Chelsea handler No, you never saw that video. Oh my god. Let me see that. Yeah, there's a video They were friends for a minute. Is it she great and my daughter my daughter loved Hannah Montana And now Hannah Montana's being on the street while she's drinking. Yeah, dude She's kind of come around now. She's being on the street while she's drinking a beer. Yeah, dude. Well, she's kind of come around now.

She's like singing with Dolly Parton. I know the problem is my daughter looked up to her. So she went from loving Hannah Montana. Now my daughter drinks and pees on the ground constantly. Yeah, so my mom. For pictures. That was one of the greatest things I ever saw my mom do is when we were pulled up to the high school.

I was a kid and she just got out and peed standing up. Really? Yeah, in the parking lot. Standing up? Yeah. She just grabbed her underwear peed standing up really yeah in the parking lot standing up Yeah, she just grabbed her underwear from the bin and ripped it to the front Got it a little bit and just whizzed. It was awesome. I was like my mom's the shit Yeah, her and her friend did it at the same time. They were gonna pee cappy How old was she? She was 13 oh, okay, no, no, she was a she'd be 20 something

Yeah, my mom man. I'll tell you that would, that would have been a thing. My mom went back to college when she was 29, I think, or 28, but she, um, no, I guess when she was 27, she went to college, but she started hanging out with like, she was in college, and she was like her girlfriends at the time, and she always worked in retail. So she's like young friends who I thought were the hottest. What's crazy now at me being 45 is seeing them being like 60. So they weren't even, you know, maybe not like 50 something and just weird to see them like, oh wow.

That was like that young girl, he used to be my mom, he used to bring around. And really that young my mom was. Yeah, my mom was young too, she used to my mommy spring around. It was like young my mom was. Yeah, my mom was young too. She had me when she was 18. Yeah, 19 is my mom. Yeah, she had me when she was 18. And I mean, yeah, they,

I see in a girl standping in a parking lot. I don't know what, this is hot. I see my mom doing it. It's weird. But I, I, I, I really look at my mom, but I just, sorry. I heard that and the, the noise women make when they pee is just, I remember my mom naked. Sounds just sorry. I heard that. And the noise women make when they pay is just I remember my mom naked. Sounds like a like a horse. There's no, if there's no water involved to like absorb some of

that sound like a silencer. Yeah. My like cybersteady. There you go. Just cranked this side and took a hot whiz. Yeah. I think that's great. Yeah, there's a video. There's a lack of pussy bumping you out. This isn't in Sarah's deal that she has to watch this guy. Sarah's pole jay. Oh my God, this isn't even the thing.

There we go. What is that? Now it's okay. Now you can look Sarah. It's just the peeing pick. Yeah, this is a women's lip. Yeah, look, there we go. You guys fought for Now it's okay. Now you can look there. It's just the peeing pickers again. This is a women's lip. Yeah, look, there we go. You guys fought for this.

Just hanging a squirt. Yeah, just hanging on a tire. Oh, and there she's having her stuff a little, a little piss. God bless her. Yeah. Barefoot. I mean, that's disgusting.

Tennessee's finest, y'all. Tennessee's finest. Tennessee's finest. Yeah, if you look, there's a video, I don't know where it is. Jesus, that's a lot of piss. Chelsea, Chelsea Handler is in the water. They're partying and then he pees off the boat in her face and she's just laughing.

Chelsea Handler. Chelsea Handler. Who's the other face in laughing? The guy from America's pie. Jason Biggs. Yep. Huh. Can you look at?

Yeah. I can't, I've seen it. It's out there. Jason Biggs peeing on Chelsea Handler. 100% and she's just laughing. Giggle. Yeah. Well, Joe Boy was her boyfriend for a while, but I think he just went P.P.

and her coke. Bing. I'll see you guys tomorrow. See you guys. Bye. Hey guys. I was the on fire. That's my best jokes. If you just give my, give my e-mail and take off. Zaneys, I got you, buddy.

Go check out. Low ticket warning. Low ticket warning. Zaneys, we only have 45 tickets left. Sarah, we could put a 60-70 ticket side for if you want. Love that.

Yeah. Love that. You have any friends? Bring your family down from the hampshire. Don't think I have 60 friends, but you can put them on fire. If you include that Irish Catholic family, you can probably get down there. They can be here tomorrow. Yeah. Okay. We'll get them on the fight. Don't worry. Thank you. Yeah, bring them down. We'll fill it up now guys. Actually low ticket warning now. It's low because Sarah's family's coming.

And we're having a lobster. We have a clam bake me and Bobby are going to do so much crowd work guys. Oh my God. To see it tomorrow is a crowd work guys. Oh my God, to play. I see it. Tomorrow's a crowd work show. Yeah, first of all, we're gonna have regale you with stories from our crazy night at Kid Rock, called Chris Rock's house. For sure. Yeah, with guns, killing wild pigs. We're gonna shoot guns.

And then we're gonna talk about when we did, I'm gonna get you Sucker. Or a- You're gonna get me sucked? We get you sucked. I'm gonna confuse all my Chris Rock thing. This just turned me on. I'm gonna talk about being here.

Is this what my birthday you're gonna get me sucked? Can you give me me what's little penny like? Remember little penny? No, he's a little penny. Chris Rock did little penny man for years. What? I mean what the fuck Jay? I think it was found out that Christine's too young and Bobby's too old for my jokes. My gray area is not going to feel a little penny. Bring

a little penny, please. A little penny hard away. That was Chris Rock. What the fuck? What's happening? Nike. Oh, yeah. Little penny. I do little bit. Yeah, it's a commercial little penny. You know she knows she knows little dr. Pepper Yeah, that was pretty that That was Chris rock. Come back commercials. Well, penny AT&T and that got him back into the mix. And then he got a show. A little penny. And then he got slapped by Will Smith. And then dot, dot, dot, we'll Smith slapped a soul out of him. And he came back and he slapped the funny out of him. And he came back and gave him a little bit of a ribbons. And then we waited for a year for retribution. Yeah!

What's up? Here's some not-that-bad jokes about you. Tonight at the Ryman. Yeah, I thought Lil Penny was like Kid Rock sidekick. No. It's Joe C. The sidecar on his glide, so Joe C can ride. Yeah.

Oh, man. We're going to be doing. We're going to be cranking this tonight. I'm going to ask him about every song he does. Is ball with a ball true story? That's not true about what? That's the. Is ball with the ball true story that's not story about what is ball with the ball real that happened to you what's up Jacob what are you gonna do if he doesn't even show up

is he supposed to high well then off to do the next bit I have to throw on a wig and a fedora and go out there and do it myself man I guess I'll have to be kid rock tonight oh my moment no moments, the moment's past. Kid Rock is not interested in friendship with me. It's okay. I'm gonna give you a watch. I'm friends with Marcus King, dude. That's rad.

That is cool. I hope I get the watch. So let me ask you a question. If he invites me back, you'll come with me. Well, there's gonna be an awkward moment where you're gonna have to ask if your friend Jake can come and he could X me out And then chase girlfriend too. Oh course. Yeah, so you oh what oh No, you don't have to ask for us Wait

I don't want her to embarrass me a kid Rox house. I mean you did embarrass us in first class today You may as well you idiots in front of Kathy Lee Gifford It was nuts who looks like a book most of the time. And Jenna and what's her name? Joe Jenna Joe Johansson. What's her name? What's that dude's name? Who?

Oh, Joe Hanson. No, the girl, the comic. Oh, Jordan Jensen. Jordan Jensen. Sorry. David Johansson. Yeah, she got on the plane. And she's in coach, not even comfort plus. And you talk to her.

I you talk to her. Bobbi. Bobbi. No, Bobby. I I broke the seal on that. What? I broke the seal. I was like, I was like, Hey, Jordan, why should the show us now? We don't know each other very well. So it's I'm getting the nowhere. She seems nice. Jay. Friends now. Yeah. Jay, you don't look at her. I thought she was I should have looked around and saw that there was no way she was going to be in first class with us. I would have respected Jordan more if she grabbed Kathy Lee Gifford by her fucking skip by her fucking mummy hands and threw out of there.

Uh, who just broke off. Really did. You tried apple hands. Yeah. It's terrible. Just live a spot. I know. I know.

I know. I better ask, looks like fucking Rick Flair's chest. I tell you what, I'd still do her. Caffee Lee? 100%. Over Hota for sure. A 100%. Oh.

A 100%. I'd be with her right now. Hota's gross. American bad ass watched me kick. Oh, you could suck my dick. Don't tell me how to live, Lou. We gotta take a break. Don't be right back.

Don't pull a kid rock. Don't tell me how to be Lou. It's the blonde fire. We'll be back. Oh. Got the wall. Damn. We're gonna be the middle.

Yeah. Oh! I've got the wall there, wicker, wicker! Yeah! I'm Josh Adamiris, and you're listening to The Bond Fire with Big J. O'Coursen and Robert Kelly. All you gotta do is change the hair and the glasses, and they're the exact same person. A real Scoodle-Doo. a real Scoodle-Doo. That is a good song. That... Cindy Lopper Who? Yeah, that's a stoogeist song, though.

Yeah, but it doesn't matter. She... She... She put her stink on it. She did put her stink on it. The original version of this is nowhere near as good as the Joan J. Boyd. I mean, Joan J. That voice is just scratchy and...

I mean, I'm not sure if it's a ghost. I'm not sure if it's a ghost. I'm not sure if it's a ghost. I'm not sure if it's a ghost. I'm not sure if it's a ghost. I'm not sure if it's a ghost. That's she put her stink on it. She did put her stink on it. The original version of this is nowhere near as good as the Joan Joe I made Joan yet that voice is just scratchy and She made it a little bit of a bigger song than they I mean like bigger like she made all her songs bigger More popular No, I don't mean that well successful No like a larger than life bigger sound. Yeah, she put she put bass into it. Sure. Yeah, that's a good way to put it because the stooge is one is like, there's no good copies of it.

It's like always like sounds like a shitty like tape player. You know, I found out today one of the most unattractive things in the world for your significant other to do. A skin cake. You don't eat a hard boiled egg in front of you. Why is it? It's gross to look at and And you know what it smells like in her mouth right now. Yoke. Yeah. When the yellow crumbles on the corner of her mouth,

she didn't get it all. Yeah. Yeah. She's got some in between her teeth. And then by the way, she took a rip out of it when you know it's all like the, when you put it on an egg too, what you've left behind is pretty nasty. And then she goes, I guess she has the everything seasoning packet and she went, ugh, she put it out to me. She's like, oh, did you want to whack at this? I'm pretty sure it's a egg. Well, I mean, you are supposed to.

Nobody wants a piece of a hard boiled egg. You want some of this hard boiled egg? If I had a devil egg and took a bite out of it and gave you the other. That would be absolutely. It's a half of an egg. That's even crazier. I mean, it's a solo food.

If my, well, I don't know, if my wife, the woman I love, if I offered you a half of my egg, that's weird. Very weird. That's like saying, do it, can I take a puff of your cigar? That's just, you, that's just, that doesn't blow my mind.

That's awful. We share soup. That's weird. There's no, no, it's not the way we are to share an egg than soup. I may be right. You slide the soup over and the other person uses, I'm not afraid of Christine's mouth

and my mouth cross pollinating. It's that I'm watching her chug down a fucking a dry ass Starbucks egg. I'm trying, I'm trying to be on your side, Christine, but you always try it. You will see. You're right. The world doesn't understand Christine yet. They think I'm trying to be on your side, Christine, but you always try it. You will see. You're right. The world doesn't understand Christine yet.

They think I'm a villain. I mean, here's the thing, it's a whole egg. You just bit into it. Yeah. And you offered them teeth, if you could see teeth marks and something. Yeah, you offered me dental impressions. Real nice. Yeah, that's gross.

Cool. I think you did. I really did that. You know what, tonight's gonna be good night. We're gonna get loose We're gonna party with Kid Rock. I'm exhausted So tired I was up let me see why you Christine didn't go to sleep on I had to do an audition Vince Vaughan. No, they sent me an audition. Why do you sleep on the plane because I can't sleep on a I can't sleep on the plane dude. I can't I don't sleep on planes if we fly together from here

Would you look me to give you like a B.A. Baraka's karate chop to the no because I'll tell you what I think I'm I've never tried before But I think with one chop I can I can put you to sleep for I want to ask you a question. Yes, I almost called you last night for help Okay, would you have helped me To put you to sleep no, I think I tell you a story Would you have helped me to put you to sleep? No, I think I tell you a story. With my audition. Of course, yeah, absolutely. Like you would have read, I needed somebody,

here's a problem, my wife was supposed to read with me. Okay, she goes to bed with Max in the bunk bed there, or the loft bed. Where I'm reading for Vince Vaughan movie. Jacob, it's an Italian guy we're here jayke talking yeah he's talking to bobby

he's talking about the show i know i swear you know it is i'm getting a little feedback oh my head phones like that so i was like did i he's not supposed to talk and let's do it so i thought jayke was having a conversation sometimes i'm sorry um... yeah so movie uh... whatever they whatever, they reached out and they reached out through Jeff, by the way, with my lawyer. Nice.

And Chuck, and I didn't like to be called that by the way. He called it, so you know. Chuck Esquire, and I make him shuffle, shuffle, every time I see what the fire is. Fuck it, you know, well, you make a lot of money for them. Yeah, I had, so my wife was supposed to help me, she was supposed to go to bed and wake back up. make him shuffle shuffle every time I see what the fire is. Fucking, you make a lot of money for them then. Yeah, I had, so my wife was supposed to help me. She was supposed to go to bed and wake back up. She never woke back up.

I'm out in the shed by myself, put myself on tape. So I had to record the lines of the other person, like, and then mow off my lines. And then hit play, hit record on the thing then hit play It was a nightmare. It's like Memo voice mails Memo voice recorders. You had to leave the outgoing message and you want to be doing like 70,000 times Because you're fucking up every time nail their lines now the other lines As Josh had amars. I've helped him with stuff. I'm also weirdly good at memorizing so like I Used to be I used to be good at memorizing. I'm not as good anymore and it but this it was great

Here's the problem. Here's the problem. I'm in this business 30 years Jay. Mm-hmm 30 years. You've paid your dues I've paid my dues you'll need to take a shift from anybody here's a thing too you you having me audition for an Italian guy From New York on Italian guy from New York on a tying guy from New York You I've been at 30 years you know what I can do I Gotta put myself on tape in a shed in the middle of the night and send it to somebody I don't even know if they're gonna view it. I don't even have a minute of the show left But I will say that I do believe to the best of my knowledge Vince Vaughan does live in Nashville We could fuck him up tonight. Well, I don't want to do I didn't get the part, maybe I get the part, let's not do that yet.

No, I'm sorry, it's nice tonight. No. Is a rare opportunity, we're gonna hang out with kid rocks. We're gonna have access to AR-15s. I love these, it's my favorite actor. No. We just put two in his shins. I know.

Just so we remember this for a while. No. It might delay production, maybe an arm grace. No. I love Vince Vaughn. Vince Vaughn, if you're listening, I love you. All right, just a bear-fisted A. My favorite guy.

Cell block 99, bro. And Cell, dragged to cause concrete. I mean, he's the best. He's just giving me the pie. You're gonna catch a fucking A. No, it's a little bit too late. Robert Kelly live, everybody. There's a low ticket warning.

Yeah, there's only 45 tickets left. I think there's only 40, but wait. Nope, there's only five tickets left, because Sarah just confirmed another 40 people. All right, great. There's five tickets left. five tickets left because Sarah just confirmed another 40 people. All right, great. There's five tickets left. Five tickets left. Bigges, YouTube is special.

I'm Hill Brow now. Jocresty Devon's social media while you're out of it. Bye. See you tomorrow. Hey everybody, thanks for listening. That was just a portion of our actual serious XM radio show. If you want the whole thing, the whole damn thing, go to seriousexam.com slashbombfire for a special offer.

That's right, and go to bigjcomedy.com and robbercallylive.com to check out our standup dates coming to a city near you. Go lo lo lo lo lo. I step down your crackle crackle, I stink. Go lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo lo crackle ice stick.