The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Touching Bobby

Episode Date: July 4, 2025

Bobby asks Jay to feel his body part to show the results of his testosterone treatments, and he obliges. This changes the dynamic of the show and maybe their relationship. | The reality show "Baddies" is a spin-off of "Bad Girls Club" in which black women live in a house together, have sex, fight, and pull off each other's wigs. Jay loves this formula and watches all the episodes on The Zeus Network with his daughter. | Bobby once witnessed a violent altercation between two mothers while he was holding his baby Max. *To hear the full show to go www.siriusxm.com/bonfire to learn more FOLLOW THE CREW ON SOCIAL MEDIA: @thebonfiresxm @louisjohnson @christinemevans @bigjayoakerson @robertkellylive @louwitzkee @jjbwolf Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of The Bonfire ad-free and a whole week early.  Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus.

And now the bonfire with Big Jay Olkerson and Robert Kelly. Bob I love you. You know what? I am so glad that you did that. You know why? I was actually in my brain fantasizing that you were singing to me. I am. But then? Yes, we're flying through the universe together. Are we going to carpet? Can we do the carpet? Yes. Not in the roguosphere though, but we're outside the roguosphere, in the sky. Sky. Now everybody, because everyone knows the song, even you black and blue, you know it's you babe. Whenever I get weary I've had enough You know it, you know it, you sang it Baby, baby You know it's you babe

Just shake it now Give me your love Strength I need Please believe That it's true Come on Lou, you got it Lou, DJ Lou. Just DJ Lou.

Babe I love you Yeah! Yeah! God damn. That was, what a great moment. What a silly, he said I love Lou. Which means he loves himself. That's so cute.

I didn't even catch that. He said I love Lou. I did, Bob, I love you. Yes. And Jay, I love you. I love you. I do not love you with those eyes. Did Rogan ever say something about your eyes? No.

He called me, he told me. Did he? Yeah, he called me up. He's calling you about me now? Well, yeah, he called me up. He was like, hey, can you do me a favor? Because this is weird. Does Jay have, like, he called me up. He was like, hey, can you do me a favor? Because I'm this weird. Does Jay have like Magic eyes or something? I was like dude. I look at him every day five days a week four days a week

Five six seven times a day and they're magical. They're beautiful No, don't do that. Don't don't play with it. Is it not good when I do this? It's it's almost a door. You have baby, you have baby eyes. You have adorable Gerber baby eyes. Little Gerber baby eyes, little fat cheeks squishing them up. Oh my god. Hey everyone. We can get a picture of my eyes to go out for the shot. Let everybody see what I'm working with. Maybe get a profile where you can see my crazy long eyelashes. You do have crazy eyelashes. You have eyelashes Asian girls would die for oh Yeah, I know soy sauce

It's got nothing to do with that I'm following this Asian girl who's you know the the influencer type foodie. She goes on food things. Yeah, but she's so fucking hot The one that camps by herself No, she's a contest. She's got she's got like White college girl jugs. Oh, I mean chowder. Yeah. No, she doesn't have an accent. She actually talks like a white chick. That's not fun. Yeah, it is. No, it's not fun at all.

If I have an Asian chick judging food, I want it to be super Asian. No, it's fun because then you can- That's one good hoagie. Then you can make her talk like that when you're having sex. Yeah. Do the voice, do the voice. She goes, oh, okay.

Boy, I like your hot dog. I feel good inside my bun, my warm bun. Tell me how much I make you laugh. Oh, you're making like your hot dog. I feel good inside my bun, my warm bun. Tell me how much I make you laugh. Oh, you're making me laugh so hard. That's her, right there. God, she's, is that, no, that's not her. She's trans.

That's not her, no. Damn, I thought I had. That's not her, but she is trans, yeah. You love that. Oh, trans? You wanna try it? What's not to love, baby? Try it.

I'm talking about try. Is there a special? Is there a special going on? I could never try it because if I would, you could never even venture into even trying stuff like that because I have too many tattoos. Yeah.

You know what I mean? Like notable tattoos. Like it says Maximus on my background. And if she ever did like some spy video, it's just, she blurred my face out and it's just a chubby fat guy blowing a trans woman. And then it just says Maximus on the back of my arm. And there's a bonfire logo on my arm.

Yeah, my tattoos would really stand out in gay pornography. Yeah, dude. My bonfire logo on my hand, just pulling cock onto some guy's pornography. Yeah, dude. My bonfire level in my hand just pulling cock onto some guy's face. Exactly. We can't be curious anymore. There's too many ways to get whacked.

I can't be curious. Not with these identifying marks. Yeah, dude. I have serenity, courage, and wisdom on my forearm as I'm jerking her off. More like jizdom. Yeah. You have gizz-dom. Yeah. You have Dawn on your knuckles.

I have, yeah, well. That's the dead giveaway. Oh yeah, I know. I have. That's not me. Jerking a guy off with Dawn on your. It says my name on your knuckles. He just came on my fucking name.

I have a full Legion, on my finger, I have a full Legion of Skanks logo and the Bonfire logo. Yeah. Legion of Skanks, so much, so much stuff. We can't, there's no way we can venture out back in the day when Norton used to go to the meatpacking district with no tattoos. I know, Jim's so smart, they have no identifying marks. I know.

He's even shaved off his head and lost his eyebrows, just to make sure. No one even knows who that is. It's just the beginning of a creative character. What went in? I think a small version of one of those Prometheus things. You might as well tattoo your name and address on your hand. I think there's a baby Prometheus in there having sex with a trans person.

Yeah, I get nervous. I wouldn't even go to a massage parlor anymore. I would never go because I found out that my cop friend at the cigar lounge... They all have cameras? The FBI... It's not the local cops, it's the FBI. Okay. Have cameras in all these places,

and they let them put cameras in, and they record stuff. I don't know if it's to... what it's for, but he would come in and be like, hey, don't go to the place this week, you guys. I'll let you guys know. Because there's a bunch of older dudes that go, and it's right underneath the cigar lounge.

And I don't understand what that tone is. Well, it was the way you said it. You said you came in, you said, guys, don't go this week. Take a couple days off of going downstairs. And then you did a quick leg. To the old, I mean, some guys, some creeps there that do go. I can't go. I can't go.

I have too many identifying tattoos. I don't want to be on some fucking. You could wear long sleeves. Well, getting a table shower? Yeah. If I can't get the table shower, I'm not going. Oh, that's what you go for mostly? Mostly.

Really? Oh, I love a table shower. You put a lot of the heavy lifting on rub over a tug No, I have the tug is very is good But without the rub without cleaning me off first, I like being washed. We're absolving you of sin Baptized in the water of a thousand other dudes. I love I know it's terrible. Yeah, it's other guy soup of a thousand other dudes. I love. I know it's terrible.

Yeah. It's other guy soup. It really is. Best table showers in your Manhattan. Yeah. Oh, really? Where is that? We get them to come in here.

We have them come in the show and wash us. Maybe we did that on Thursday. Maybe we did that Tuesday. Who knows? You can do a real spas have table showers. Yeah. Where they cover. They do a whole body scrub on you and they have a table you get on and they scrub you up.

But the ones that they have, it's just a bucket of lukewarm. It's a trash, one place I went was a trash pail. Yeah, with a soup fucking ladle in it. Yeah. And they just. This one I think just had like an old like Cool Whip container and they were just fucking bowling it out onto my body and burning Kevin Hart.

I miss those. Let me try to find that girl. Who do you like? What do you do? She's a New York girl, New York foodie girl, Asian girl. So cute. And she eats like a just a, like just eats like a Fatso, but she's so in shape.

Is her name That's Dericious? No, give me another one though. That's the best one. That one took me five minutes for that one. That's Delicious? That's Dericious. That's Dericious? Yeah. That's a great name.

That's Dericious, she's Vietnamese. You know what I saw yesterday, dude? This is fucking, this is what I think we should do with our army. I think we should make all, the whole army, black women. Okay. Because there's nothing more terrifying and frightening than a front line of Yamanicas

who aren't scared of nobody. Yeah, just give them pots and pans in their hands. Dude, I was at the Pussycat yesterday before I came in here, and there was a, this black dude was running down the street and his girlfriend, I guess he did something to piss her off, and she was running after him and just swiping at him like a cat.

You motherfucker. I mean, he was scared to death. And then there was a black suburban, five, five army people got out of the car. They were just sitting there at West Forth Station. Five army people got out of the car. They were just sitting there at West Forth Station. I guess they're planted all over the city now. Five army, what do they call them? The...

Soldiers? Reserves? Reserves. I'm talking with the guns, the vest, the whole outfit got out and were trying to break it up and she was not afraid She was swatting these motherfuckers out of her get the fuck out this motherfucker She didn't give a fuck to the point where they just gave up our army our army We're like, yeah fuck. Sorry, dude and this poor guy just caught a beating from this girl this girl, cause they kept trying to push her back,

push her back, and she was like, fuck that motherfucker. Just swatting, without hurting the army people, you know what I mean, without getting arrested, she was just pushing them and slipping by them and just taking swipes at his face. So are we taking the stance here at the bonfire, all of us? I'll usually sandbag you with this, Bobby. Well I'm glad you admit it. I'm now say, are we all taking the stance now

that soldiers are cowards? Is that what we're gonna play in it? I would say- Are we gonna be the show that says soldiers are cowards? Are we gonna be the ones willing to say it? I wouldn't say that. I would say angry black New York girls are their kryptonite. Stronger.

Black women are stronger than our cowardice army. Man, they're strong. They're scary, man. put it on a shirt. Let's get it up his merch Black women are stronger than our cowardice army black Lou yes, your thoughts. I believe Bobby said army reserves Weakness to the week they're not weak. They're very I'm very One black woman gets involved one black woman it can take them all out Yeah, but if we take my theory and make them all black women. Yeah We're gonna be I mean nobody's gonna fuck with us Could you imagine?

jacquanda born 30,000 Yamanicas coming at you No Actually, yes, I could I did a lot of black comedy when I was younger. Scary. After those shows, there'd be 30 Yamanicas coming at me. And they wanted a taste. Yeah, because you got naked.

They wanted to taste the forbidden fruit. Because you did a little dance at the end with your fucking jazz fingers. I did go jazz fingers in full wiener bump show. What was I thinking? Why did I do that act? I was such a coward as an influencer, because I am, I took my phone out immediately. I cowered into the parking garage and just stuck my phone out around the corner.

Really? Because I was so scared. I'm a black woman. Buddy, and I don't even know. Who are you filming? I don't even know where it came from. I just realized as I was doing, I'm like, I'm a coward. Like I'm not even, like I should just know where it came from. I just realized as I was doing it, I'm like, I'm a coward. Like, I'm not even...

Like, I should just say, fuck it and just film it, but I was hiding. My arm was around the corner. And then I realized I was so nervous. I didn't even film it. I didn't even hit record. I was panicking. Well, what black chicks are willing to do, which is great, is they will fight

with the same confidence, uh, even though they don't know how to fight at all, they go into all fights with the confidence that they really do know how to fight. I know this because I've been watching Baddie's Gone Wild on Zeus TV, which I believe is Black TV now. There's only three shows on the network. It's one about the strip club, Baddie's Africa, Baddie's Gone Wild.

And they don't even like hate each other, they just get into a thing over something. It's like, I told you I was wearing a blue shirt today. It's like, bitch, I wear blue every day and that's my shit. And then it's like, then they think for a second and then just go at it like two fucking animals beating the living shit out of each other, but poorly. Because they have foam fists and just, not on,

I mean, none of them must be strong whatsoever. Right. But it's still scary. But, well, I'm saying, the noise of it looks like it's a scarier situation. Yeah. Yeah. Is this it?

Give her a taste. This is cute. I see Marsh, and Jan, and Krishan. These are over nothing, these fights. Wait a minute, can you explain this to me? They're in a field. It's the lawn outside of the mansion they put them in. Oh, okay.

They get a bunch of, and I use alliteration on purpose, pig pieces of shit together in a house. That's good alliteration. And they're willing to die for whatever it just to be in this place. Lou, you would love this show. This is right up your alley, DJ Lou. I don't think so. Too many wigs. Give me one sec. Ready?

Nice. Cold, cool, refreshing. Beer. I'm off the wagon. Damn, dude. You're drinking an IPA? That's nice. Well, it is summer. I like apple cider. Summer. That's my new Well, it is summer. I like apple cider. Summer. That's my new thing too. He's back.

I drink and then do that. Nice. So this is derivative of the Bad Girls Club. Used to be on the Auction Network. Got it. It was my favorite show. Mm-hmm. I almost got a tattoo with a logo.

Ha ha. Then we would have really known who you were when you were jerking off a transy. A fucking real bad girl. Ha ha ha. Bad girls. Then we would have really known who you were when you were jerking off a transy. A fucking real bad girl. Bad girls. So this girl here, this crazy horse face lunatic, and by the way, Lou, you're right about the wigs, my man.

No one's got real hair on these shows. But it's a very, it's a nice, it evens things out. It's the equilibrium of the world. Because these girls and their confessionals get all dolled up. And at their best, some it evens things out. It's the equilibrium of the world. Because these girls and their confessionals get all dolled up. And at their best, some of them look pretty good. And then you see, once the wigs come off, they're all just bald little fucking weirdos.

They're all just little fucking, they look like Louis Gossett Jr. and Enemy Mind. Come on, Jacob. My girlfriend makes me watch Real Housewives of Atlanta and there's not a real hair amongst them. No, and that just makes you racist. This is different. This is something different.

Enemy mind? What the fuck, I wanted to see that. Dennis Quaid from Louis Gostin's Enemy Mind? Go on, Christine, bring up the dragon, what do they call it, the dragons? Is that the... I can't remember what he's called, but I remember what he looked like.

Is that the fight when they fight, when they're stranded on the... Yeah, the island, Yeah, the planet. The planet? And that's... I forgot about that. He looks like Louis Gossett Jr., an enemy of mine. But didn't he learn to talk English by the end? Yeah, yeah.

Right? Yeah. That's so funny. Love Dennis Quaid. Love Dennis Quaid. Wow, that's so funny. I know. Little asshole mouths and their fucking bald heads.

That's what they all look like. Yeah, see? A little one. There's a little one. They, but they are willing to fight over absolutely anything. As soon as they get a, they've had to move to a new house already on this season show.

Why would they do the house? Just the people were like, it's a problem. They kicked them out. Oh, the owners of those. So they're renting this house out like an Airbnb. Yeah to film this show. Yeah, right so then they get another house and As soon as they go into the house the girls pick their rooms and then girls who hate those girls go in those rooms and just flip their mattresses over and rip all Their shit out and pour like mouthwash all over their mattresses. And they're like, fuck you, bitch. They just go to bed and then they wake up in the morning

and they had a night to think about it. He goes, I had to sleep on mouthwash last night. I'm gonna punch this bitch while she's eating cereal. And then they just do. And then they go and they get to grabbing and hair pulling and then security rips them apart and then just resets them and lets them go again. And then eventually lets it go.

But it is just. Like BattleBots? Yeah, take a peek, give it a little taste. This is all in between baddie, baddie, shot o'clock, which happens a lot. Oh yeah, also baddie's baddie shot o'clock happens a lot. I'm sorry, what? Well, wild bitches do shots, Bobby.

When you're a wild bitch, and you couldn't possibly understand this at your advanced age, wild bitches. I find that very offensive. You shouldn't at all. I should. So what, you're a mature man. I'm not.

But Baddy's Baddy Shot of Claw is when me and a bunch of other bad bitches, wild bitches, take shots and then after we take the shot we do a little like a twerk move like this. A twerk move. To the song. Oh man. What happened?

My old age just hurt that joke. Ah, that's from calling me old. No, you don't know what happened. Age just whacked you right in the face. No it didn't, I'll tell you where it whacked me. I just did it. In your coccyx? No, I just did a twerk and I was really close to my chair

and my dangling balls nicked the chair and gave me that stomach thing. My old dangling man balls. Well that's gonna go away soon with your tea. You're going to have tight little tranny nuts in a couple weeks. I can't wait on my little golden raisins. You're going to spit out little, that's your jizz.

That's when you come. That's it. No clean up next to that. You'll be able to flick it right off your belly. Oh, I don't mind that. It just evaporates when it comes out right away. Do you shrink your nuts? Yeah, well, I can. You can actually take another thing

that tricks your nuts into thinking that you need to... Because what it does is... Bobby, I don't have to do that. They said my nuts are fine. I don't have to trick them. Bobby, at his older age... I do. My nuts are awesome right now. Sure they are. I'll put my nuts against your nuts any day.

Put them in my hand. I'll do it right now. You any day put him in my hand. I'll do it right now You want me to do it right now? I'll do it right now. This is called a gay challenge. I'm not gonna say no Put your hands up No, no videotape this Yeah, I'm doing it for real. Yeah, well you can videotape it from behind. Oh, you're from behind come on ready You're okay, look you put the micpe it from behind. Do it from behind. Come on, ready? Can we go see it? Luke, can you put the mic closer so I can catch all this gayness? I don't even want the ball dropped.

You ready? Now these, this is weak, son. that. What do you think, huh? Come on, we really did it. Yay! Yeah, I didn't shower. Nuh-uh. Yeah. Come on. Yeah, I just forgot.

It's 100 degrees out, too. I forgot, and I worked out at 5.30 in the morning. Chest. Why didn't you shower after that? Because I had to go right in town. Had to leave. What? For what? Time better.

I was meeting Gary Gellman for breakfast before therapy. That didn't happen. Yeah, it did happen. He died four years ago. He's not dead. He's fully alive. We had breakfast. We had a very nice conversation. Even with all this PRL, I'm worried if I rub it into my other hand, then I'm just transferring

nuts over my other hand. But, all right, besides your hand smelling like pennies and mustard, let me ask you a question. Do you? You're putting way too much perello in your hand. I'm just soaking it. Why don't you just let it hold it there for a while? Let it just get.

Besides that, my nuts. Soak it, you should probably wash your hands. We have a whole show to go. Hey, besides that, those nuts... Hey, man, don't threaten me, man, with little nuts. How were they, though? They were nice. They were big. They were so full. They were full of man juice.

I don't even feel like the nuts themselves. The sack was so dense. Yeah, I got a nice sack, dude. I got a nice sack. Game day, what's up? If you're doing tea, you're supposed to have more testosterone. What happens is, I'll spend a tea,

what happens is this, when you do tea, it tells your body, it tells your nuts, hey, you don't need to produce anymore testosterone. So what you can take is another thing that says, hey, we need some stuff, so keep producing it. You know what I mean? So your balls don't get small if you wanna do that. Jacob.

If it happens, but it doesn't happen to everybody. Some guys just keep their nuts, like I kept my nuts. We could cut this into show if you have something. Yeah. What? No, beard. What? What does he have? I. Beard. What?

What does he have? I'll get it. No, no, no, touch it. No, no, touch it. Good. No, no, no. Now I see. I got it.

Keep your ball sack hands off. I don't want it. I want the lingual. Leave it. I just freaked out. I was like, my eyebrows. What do I do? Use my not bald hand, I guess?

I'm going looking. I just freaked out, I was like, my eyebrow, she says, what do I do? Use my knotballed hand, I guess? They're not bad though, right? I mean. It's a lot, I got a lot to process. Yeah, well, you asked for it. Absolutely. You did.

Yeah, god damn it. Lou, right here, you got a little. I'm okay with it. Something right here, though. No, I don'm okay with it. Something right here though. No, I don't, because there's cameras I worry about. It's just a little smudge. Maybe she, I don't want to smell anymore of Bobby. You want me to get over there?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, just go get it. Do you want me to get over there and grab that for you? I think I'm okay. Let me come over there and grab it for you. I think I'm okay. Really, okay, just grab it. He already needs us to smell his farts. Now he wants us to smell his balls.

This guy needs us to feel how powerful he is. Oh, in the meantime, probably I should give Christine. Yeah, you should give Christine a kiss and a little. Do you know if your hand is the same size as the girl's face? She's your soulmate? Oh, I didn't know that. It's your left. Your left hand.

It's gotta be your dog's hand. Why is Christine not flinching like Jacob? She wants to fucking taste your balls so bad? I read her diary. She didn't know that. I'm probably less scared of balls like Jacob. Did she want to fucking taste your balls so bad? I read a diary. She didn't know. I'm probably less scared of balls than Jacob. Just as a general statement. Well, I didn't hear what you said.

What did you say? I said I'm probably less scared of balls than Jacob, just as a general statement. Did you get it? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So there you go. My nuts are nice. How are your nuts? I don't know right now.

We should see if Christine can guess whose nuts are whose. What do we do, taste, color, smell? Well she. We'll get Rebecca. Rebecca's coming up later, right? Rebecca, Rebecca be the scales of justice with our nutsacks. See which tilter, if it tilter to this side or this side. Oh here's, you want a little taste of what the baddies, gone wilds got going on?

And who are these guys, bouncers? They have to have these guys there? We don't call them bouncers, Bobby. In the industry we're called coolers. You're not a, in the industry. Well, not anymore. I did leave the industry, ultimately. You were never in the cooler industry.

Bobby. What? Then why did I wear a Giaz shirt one day? Because you're gay. No. You're Philly gay. It wasn't no, because I went to a school that had a little bit of violence in it,

and I had to go, I cooled it. You cooled it with what? My cooling skills, dude. Well, what are your cooling skills? I don't know if you know this. If you take the biggest guy in the world, you smash his knee, he'll drop like a sack of bricks. That's from Roadhouse.

Well, the information was also conveyed in Roadhouse, sure. Okay, so it's in like a cooling page? Well, that was a movie about cooling. Right. So, it sort of is like. What makes me happy is. It's our Bible. That you can't talk without both hands

and that right hand is just like a piece of cement right now. This? Yeah. It's definitely dry. It's been dried out by the alcohol of the Purell for sure. It looks 100 years old. Take a swiff. Purell. Good.

Total Purell, mustard gone. It didn't smell. There's still a little mustard in my cuticles, but still. So they just go out in the yard and fight? Well, so what they changed was Bad Girls Club, they used to have them go and like, they try to do this too in the show, I guess. They try to have them do adventures,

but the one girl with the horse face was on Bad Girls Club, and she left and I guess joined up with this app, Zeus, and they just make complete, I'd have to call this blacksploitation television. Yeah, Black Lou, right? I mean, like, it is, these girls are willing, and there's a couple of white girls in there too, but if we're being honest, they're acting black. I love you.

You whispered that into the microphone. They're acting black. And I think you know what I mean. But they, so they didn't just go, but their fights are over. Like in the ones, we watched this, I think, when Bobby wasn't here one day. There was one, two girls, like scissor fucked one night in a hot tub, and the next day fought to blood. Like fist fought to blood over, it's just nothing.

It'll be like, this bitch thinks she's cute. And and the next day, fought to blood. Like fist fought to blood over, it's just nothing. And I'm like, this bitch thinks she's cute. And she goes, bitch, you're ugly. And it's like, and they just stare at each other, and then just war. They just go to fight, and then other people jump in, there's no rhyme or reason, there's no honor code. There is, they think there is, but it shifts constantly.

It's like, yeah, no, I know I'm not supposed to jump in on other people's fights, but I'm not gonna watch my girl get beat up. So I jump in anyway, I don't give a fuck. And they don't care. And then they all have to share bedrooms together and stuff. Is this the horse-faced girl? No, horse-faced girl doesn't get,

she don't get her hands dirty no more. Oh, okay. She just shows up and she's like, you girls are hoes and trash. Now I have to go get on a yacht with some famous friends or something. So you guys sit here and all you have to fight over one tampon. There's only one tampon everybody and then they all fucking fist fight each other.

Now this girl is in cutoff jean shorts, a t-shirt, but it looks like she has some type of weapon or Maybe they're brutish. What's around her? What's the black thing around her waist? Maybe a waist trainer. Is that a waist trainer? Well, the problem is these girls come down they show up to almost everything Decked out right here. You can't take these bitches anywhere. No, I mean somebody goes they last week We watched one they went to a wine tasting place where they're pulling the one, you know

And they're and then a couple of them go like bitch Let's go outside and they went outside on the lawn of the thing where there's a bunch of like goofy white people in tuxedos drinking and they're fist fighting on the lawn. Their things are up, their pussies are out. One of the bitches grabs a bottle of wine, smashes it, and cuts the chick. Their pussies are always out. Their snatches and tits, yes.

Well they like lift up their dresses so they can move better. Yeah, they like pull their dresses up so they have. When they're dressed for the club, these big fat pigs, they go, they square up and then they just pull their thing up and they just have their fucking big old fat boxes hanging out with their fist up and then none of them know how to fight.

They also all wear ugly shapewear, so it's not like, it's not even thongs or sexy underwear, it's like their tummy tuck underwear. It's like fat white women that go to weddings. We eat egg pantyhose.. We had an egg panty hose. Ah! I hate egg panty hose. Go on. Give them a taste.

I think this is the blue face girl, right? Yeah. Look at Christine. The other girl's wearing like a Hooters outfit. Bye. Let me teach you, baby. Let me teach you. None of them know how to fight.

Not one of them. Come on, baby. Let me teach you. Come on. I mean, they look like they know how to fight. No, but watch when it starts. Oh, god. They also, No, but watch when it starts. Oh, God. They also, like, seem to set up fights.

Like, Bad Girls Club, the fights would just happen. They, like, take them outside to fight it out, but, like, don't let it get too rough. Can I say something, though? You say they don't know how to fight. One girl had her entire hair pulled out. Well, it came off. No, no, no. Got her wig off. Sorry.

Then the cap came off. Oh, no. and then this big fat girl grabbed her by her Cornrows and ripped him out. She's bald headed on the side. It's crazy looking But that girl who just put her dukes up they they put that was like Bruce Lee She had her hands up no everybody knows how to get in the pose So they know they know how to fight yeah, so they got the pose Physically they look like Tekken. But when they start to fight. I mean, also a lot of times they look like this.

I mean, but they're stretching, like they're really gonna fight. No, they aren't really gonna fight, but they're just fat people who just grab each other's hair. And a lot of times it's fat people beating up the hot people because that's all they have. That is like a girl move is just hair at first, right?

It's immediately what they do. And they keep calling one girl a bitch because every time she's going to get into a fight, she puts her hood up on a hoodie and ties it around her chin. And everyone's like, you putting a hood on the fight, you pussy? Or she's put on a swim cap before all these things that make... And she's like, yeah, you're not going to grab my hair the whole fight.

Smart. Brilliant. Can't you just take your hair gonna grab my hair the whole fight. Smart, brilliant. Can't you just take your hair off? That's frightening. They never do though, they seem to wanna fight with this big stupid Beyonce hair, and then it comes off and then there's little monsters. I'm like, style your actual hair into something that a fight isn't gonna ruin every time.

They all read so ugly, because all the time they are at their worst looking. Post-fight, silk hat, ripped something, bloody lip. Multiple girls on each season of these have the eye with blood in it. Like, the whole season, they have blood in their eyeball. It's nuts. They got one sexy eye, the other has no eyelash on it.

On my life, multiple girls on the two seasons that are running right now have bloody eyeballs. They're just from a fight that happened one of the days. And when they fight, it's like prison. Because when they're done fighting, they go, you know, they'll fight over, I want that bitch outta here. And they'll be like, phew.

She came with hers though, she stood on business though. And then the girl who just fought her goes, she did stand up on business though, she did put up her fist and go, you know what, she can stay. Like you just, and they don't care. Well they have honor, they have street honor. That's why, well. If that was white girls, they'd be like,

I'm sorry, I'm sorry too. Well Bobby, this is the point of the show, my point I'm making is this is your boot camp for this fucking black woman army. 100%. This is breaking them down and building them back up. Yeah, we send around 50 of these girls to Iran, if we get know it. We don't have to go.

We send them there. Oh, yeah. Is that a black girl? Yep. They're all some sort of black girl. I have something to say to you. So me, always trying to be Captain Solution, Captain Save, whatever you want to call it. What'd you call her?

Captain Solution? Save-a-ho, Captain Save-a-ho. Captain Solution. Captain Save-a-ho. That's a lot of fake gold she's wearing. Oh yeah, she's like Mr. T. And I pity the fool to get in the way of these nails and Then every season of the show They do a three episode reunion where they all come out and sit down and then somebody goes Hey

Since we saw you all saw each other last it's come out all the behind-the-back shit you guys did on the show And then they fight again, and then they come out in ball gowns and fight Pussies out, snatches out. They on this show, cause I don't know what the rules are, they almost get in the fight. The audience of the reunions, by the way it's like 30 people in the audience.

But they'll get into it too, they go, bitch you ugly, you're hitting on her because you ugly, well fuck you bitch in the audience. And then the audience girl comes out and tries to fight. It's, god, it's good. This is the reunion trailer. What is that?

This is what we got a fucking fight I ran for. What was that? Was that a woman? This is what we're fighting for over there. If we're sending these black women over there, they should know what they're fighting for. It's 100% where exactly, why we have nukes is to save this. Absolutely.

So we have the freedom to have this show. But again, my point being on this is like, I'm so afraid of fighting. It has to be like, in the moment, like I'm wound up, it can't be as stupid as like, these girls, one girl will fight, and she's like, nah, I don't like she fought her, man. That was my problem I had with her.

Like, I'm ready to go right now. And then she just stand there and like, and then the girl who just got in a fight would be like, I don't give a fuck, bitch, I'll fight you. It has to be because there's not much damage done. Because none of them are strong. Right. And the fat one's just kind of dragging

and it ends up just being a hair pull thing. So it's never that bad, I guess. But it looks wild because they go nuts. We should have this at Skankfest. Oh, Baddie Skankfest? Yeah, Baddie Skankfest. Absolutely, I'd host it. Who knows Baddie Skankfest? That'd be funny, you just got in the mix. You have two fistfuls of hair. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Tawana, you're here to talk to Cherise.

You said to her, I believe, you think this bitch is cute. And bitch thinks she's cute. Anything you'd like to say about that? Would you like to put on a silk hat and go attack somebody, like a lunatic? It is funny that they have a uniform they get into to protect them from baddies. I mean, I'm not a baddie. I'm a baddie. I'm a baddie.

I'm a baddie. I'm a baddie. I'm a baddie. I'm a baddie. I'm a baddie. I'm a baddie. I'm a baddie. I'm a baddie.

I'm a baddie. I'm a baddie. I'm a baddie. I'm a baddie. I'm a baddie. I'm a baddie. I'm a baddie. Bitch thinks she's cute. Anything you'd like to say about that? Would you like to put on a silk hat and go attack somebody like a lunatic? It is funny that they have a uniform they get into to protect themselves. It's not a helmet. It's just a stocking over their hair so they don't get their stuff pulled out.

Do you have the girl getting her fucking things pulled out? I'm trying to get the login from Isabella. Whoa. Oh, I know it. Wait. You don't know it. No, I know it. You don I know it. Wait. You don't know it. No, I know it. You don't know it.

She texted it to me. She did? Yeah, I could text it to you. OK, text it. Relax. Everybody relax. I want to see this. Relaxed.

How's your hand? You're going to see the bad-bads. Is your hand feeling weird? Oh, my hand? Yeah, what if something happened to your hand? You got some type of back pain. Start growing hair on the palm. Your hand turned into my nuts.

Ha ha ha. It now becomes the beast. What is this thing that you counteract the small nut, like an anti-small nut shot? Uh-oh, Jacob's been dealing with small testicles. We were so far from that conversation. He's like, hey guys, guys. It's just another thing that you can give your body.

I think, I forget what it is. So you're taking tea and you're telling your nuts to produce tea also. But it's not everybody. My nuts haven't shrunk, right? But if my testicles shrunk and I wasn't producing sperm anymore or something like that, you know what I'm saying?

They went too small. I could take something that would trick my body into, hey, we need you to do this. And still take tea. And take tea. Take tea and say, regrow my nuts. I'm going to say this too. The tea, it works. I mean, I work out now, and it's like,

I've never worked out before. Like, I had a plateau working out, as far as where it was like, ugh. Don't be so fudgy. It's your tiny, tiny little balls, dude. Yeah, they're tiny. I don't want them to become tiny. Yeah, but you're small.

Are you taking tea? No. Dude, what's the big deal, because you have little teeny tiny balls. You don't know. It makes your wiener look bigger. Take your hand out. Put your.

Jake, give me a taste of that sack, dude. Jay becomes the, what's that wine tasting guy? Connoisseur. No, for the wine. Sommelier. Sommelier. A ball sommelier. He goes, first thing I'm gonna say for your age, good heft.

Yeah, he works for game day every Wednesday, every other Wednesday. So he's coming in next week to see if your balls need estrogen. He's gonna pop in and hold nuts a little bit. So what? No, you get fine nuts, Jacob, I'm sure. I wouldn't test now,

cause when I'm cold, they're tight now. Yeah, that's what you want. All the fibers have tightened up. Yeah, when it's cold, they're tight now. Yeah, that's what you want. All the fibers have tightened up. Yeah, when it's cold, your balls get, but today's a hot day, they should be hanging. Right, but we're not outside. Well, we can go outside for lunch and we'll check them out. Outside, they would relax.

You wanna show me your balls outside, buddy? Outside, I'll show you. Thank you. You're 49th. Finally. Everyone, 49th Street, that's the place to be. Oh, you got it? I'm in.

I was in. You go to Browse, and then you go to Baddie's. I don't think I would connect with any of these women. No. Not Baddie's Africa. No. What are their boyfriends like? I mean, they gotta be a-

Go down to their show, these girls? Yeah. They don't have any boyfriends. Oh, I said they're barge that people separate them Well that lady has a baby so she had to be with somebody So I just go to the show She she know how to navigate this site at all Is that lady holding a baby and get a little fight is she gonna get a fight with a child in her hands? The newest one is that a form of defense? Can't you get a fight with a child in our hands? The newest one. Is that a form of defense?

Six. You just hold the baby in front of your face. They look like the type that would not stop if somebody was holding a baby, though. All right, I'll look for it on here. Was that the newest episode? I believe so. No.

It's Christine Evans. It's the one that says new episode. There, hair slay. Oh, I thought this just came out. Okay. Come on, you wanted to. I was in that. One of the decisions why I wanted to move is when my Baby's R Us was Times Square.

So when I had to go to get formula and we had to get a special formula, sometimes CVS didn't have a Duane read, didn't have, so I had to go to Baby's R Us and I was in line. When Max was born here. When Max was born, I had to go baby carriage through Times Square, go to Babies R Us and I was in line. When Max was born here. When Max was born, I had to go baby carriage through Times Square, go to Babies R Us, go up to the floor, get the formula, and I was in line and two mothers just went at it with children grabbing hair, spitting at each other's faces.

Yeah, it's time to move. And I was just frozen with my little child. And I was like, with my little child. And I just, I was like, we have to get out of here. Because I, I'm, I don't know, I was terrified. Because, like, could I fight them? I don't, you can't fight, you can't hit a woman. Like, God forbid she said something to me.

Plus, you don't want your kids stroller to do an Untouchables downstairs. Downstairs. Because you have to fight two black women. Terrifying, terrifying. It happened so quick too. Like he was saying, Jay, everything's fine. And then something was said, and it was like,

why don't you fucking move up or something like that. What? Why don't you move? I'll move up when I want to move. And it's like quiet, and then it's like, bitch, you don't fucking tell me, you don't't you move? I'll move up when I want to move. And it's like quiet, and then it's like, bitch, you don't fucking tell me, you don't fucking move up, I'll move up. And then just hair, they're mincing hair,

and then spitting, and the kids weren't, this is the weird part, the kids weren't crying. Like, this is what my mama does. Yeah, they were just watching like it was a TV show. Like, if I started, Get it in, mama! Fighting somebody in front of Max, I'm sure he would have cried at that age.

These kids are just sitting there holding diapers for the mom. These girls also, by the way, on the show, have borderline anorexic bodies all the way to morbidly obese bodies. Those that we're looking at, frozen picture, those look like ass implants also. Maybe. Like basketballs.

What you're looking at is the girl in the camel brown with the long hair and the strap on her big fat back, right there? Yeah. That's Daisy Dukes. Daisy Dukes likes to fight, because that's all she has, because she's very, very fat. That looks like Brian Scalaro in a skirt.

It does. God bless Brian before you. I don't get an email. She doesn't like Bahati. Bahati? Who is an African girl who's got, I mean lips that almost touch her eyebrows and chest. They're crazy. How they go and start.

But she's also has, she's moving little cornrows and they get ripped out, the whole side of her hair gets ripped out of the skin. It's crazy. Are these girls gay? They sleep with each other. I see one of them holding a gay... No, they're all bisexual because they're pieces of shit and they just want to be on TV. So even if they're not,

they'll just suck each other's pussies to get screen time. Really? Yes, they're animals. Why do I not know about this show? Well, you don't have to do that. Yeah, I have a, yeah. I have a 22-year-old daughter who brought this to me, and she was like, Dad, remember Bad Girls Club

that you turned me on to to show me not what to be? I found better. I found better now. And she talked, for a year she was talking this up to me. Was that your father advice? Don't be this. Yeah. I swear to God, right?

Whenever she would bring those things to me, like young Cardi B she brought to me, I brought that to the show. You can date guys who like this, just don't be this. Do not be this, please. I'm attracted to a couple of them, the girl in the pink hair and then the one all the way on the right.

The one in the pink hair is maybe ugly, the one on the way to the right is Nicki Minaj's sister. Oh, that's why. Why, you like Nicki Minaj? No, I don't, which one? I gotta see a picture. You just said that's why. Why? You like Nicki Minaj? No, I don't. Which one? I gotta see a picture. You just said that makes sense.

But that's why. Well, I figured she's a celebrity daughter. Show Nicki Minaj. No, it's not a daughter. It's a Nicki Minaj sister. Show Nicki Minaj and show Jacob how much he's going to hate everything about how she looks. I think I...

You like the thin pink girl. Yeah. That's Nicki Mina You like the thin pink girl. Yeah. That's Nicki Minaj. That's actually her, is that her sister? No, we wouldn't get along. Is that Nicki Minaj or her sister? Yeah, that's where her butt implant starts coming separated

when she's sitting down. No, no. I think Nicki Minaj is hot. That ass thing is a weird picture. That's just gross. That's too much. She's disgusting. The sister's better for me. She's 19 also No, it's totally cool. You're asking me to pick if I have to pick one from this this show

I know I swear all my life nobody Just make up Under the head and said I have to fuck one of these girls. You just start calling out which ones you'd fuck. There you go. All right, guys, settle down. Jacob's got some work. Well, we're commenting on the show, should I not say anything? I guess I'll just be quiet.

I told you they're all deplorable pieces of shit. No, but I... Physically. What you're saying is the thin blonde one, I mean, with the pink hair, you like that. And the girl over to the right. So you like the smaller girls. I haven't got to know their personalities yet.

I feel like we're about to find out. Because you have small tight nuts. Yeah, you don't want these girls to laugh at your teeny tiny little mouse balls. No, no, I think every one of the women in this frame would laugh at me. Did you just break Jacob? He went, no, no. There's not one of these. They're gonna're gonna go oh shit look at that little ball let me get my girlfriend let

me get my girlfriends in here guys this her brim hair out let it fucking go the audio on this Oh My god, so right now she's grabbing her cornrows The big girl's ass is just out disgusting she had under her honors. Yeah, but her ass ate eight hours ago. Ha ha ha. That was so disgusting. Look, this last little yank, she yanks it out of her head. Oh no, she yanks the thin, oh god. Oh, she walks like a trophy.

She walked away like a trophy. Oh, she pulled it out. It was like a trophy. She's walking around swinging it around. And then she later on in the same episode, she sits down with that girl and she goes, I feel bad about doing that. And the girl's like, fuck you bitch, I hope you die. And she goes, well I said I'm sorry, I don't know what to do.

And then they start fighting again. It's so good. Can you buy that on eBay? That little clump of hair? She just sprinkled it on the floor like a... Oh god, she has to shave her head now. I think she shaves her head on the show. She has to.

So she went from that luxurious, curly black hair... Wig. Yes, that. Yeah. And that was underneath it. And this was underneath it, corn road up. She had a little corn road up, and she ripped the corn rows out. Now, talk about making chicken salad out of chicken shit, though.

Turning some bad into good. Yeah. Isabella did make a point, and she said, now that she has shaved her head, the wigs lay flatter, actually does look better if you're gonna commit to wigs like that. A bald head underneath. But again, far more enemy mine, Louis Gossett Jr.,

jarring when the thing comes off, you go, oh, you're completely bald, actually. That's fucking terrifying. I thought you were gonna have little black girl nubs or something. I like bald girls. Is it, I'm learning about culture. That's a way to say it.

I mean, black women wear it like a swimming cap. A swimming cap on. Yeah, do me a favor, Jacob. Black women wear a swimming cap under their hair? But you're asking me through Jay. You're asking me, Jay, through me, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, Jay knows more.

Your question? I mean, she looks like that's like a swimming cap under her wig. On the fat one. Yeah, it was a stocking. On the big fat one. It's a stocking to hold, just to keep the cornrows down also and have the cornrows not like get rubbed out.

I did a couple black girls and over at night they would put like a durag on her head. So her, cause she had an afro, so they would put a durag on her head so she would not mess up her fro. Well that's, Bobby's talking again, Bobby's in an advanced age, so that's a long time ago. Now they put on like a silk thing over their head,

a silk bonnet. I mean a durag or a silk bonnet. A durag, I guess Bobby was dating girls in the Rollin' 88 Crips. I did it at Edjimima. Ha ha ha. Bobby only dated the help. The cap is to protect the real hair,

and then the wig goes on top. Yeah, that's right. But what's the final, what are you trying, so you're trying to actually grow out the real hair? No. No. No. No, you want the wig.

Couldn't give two shits about the real hair. No, they keep the real hair, it's just covered up, and they put the cap over it so the wig will lie flat on the head. Okay. Yeah, the little hair is there just in case, like, you know, they can't have or a wig gets fucked up or something, and then you can pull that out and, I guess, do some kind of little curly, like, short afro thing with it.

Didn't we watch the guy with... We watched a video with the guy with the leaf blower who went around, like, black neighborhoods to, like, bus stops and stuff, and he would blow the wigs off of chicks. And they would get violently angry. Because they'd just be sitting there and the guy would go over to the leaf blower

and just blow and the thing would just fly up in the air. Some girls would laugh though. Some girls would think it was funny. But yeah, there's like a piece of lace in the front. It's a whole thing. Yeah. I mean, it's expensive. I did it at Black hole once and we were trying

We were getting like sexy and I went to you know, I'm my thing We can grab her hair and you know starting to move fucking and she was like, but well, well, well Don't even fucking think about doing that white shit to me. This hair. It cost me a lot of money and I was like, oh, sorry Yeah, you can't just grab I mean a wig is such a commitment. I mean how bad that can go if it goes bad. But I mean that looks nuts. That looks perfect, doesn't it? Yeah no it does but that's also the problem is a wig,

I don't know how, as much as eye color, when people put in color contact lenses, can change a fucking face. It's amazing how much it changes. Where you're just like, someone who you're like, oh, I guess, because I watched that show, is the best point of it. You see these girls baldheaded

in those caps all day, and some of them look, they're so masculine, they're always fighting, in their underwear and shit, but their faces are all angry and they're acting so dude-ish. And then they put on the dresses. Before they fight in those, you're like, they all look beautiful. Like just like facially with their makeup done

and the long hair and then like, oh they're just bald little cornrow Allen Iverson heads underneath of them. That's crazy, this lady's playing with you. He goes, hey I think I was fucking this hot chick then you went to the bathroom and came back as Carmelo Anthony. Is everything okay?

Hair is everything. I mean with- No, I mean not everything. I don't know if that, I would say that. But I'm saying in the movies, if a guy, the villain is bald. Oh, almost 99% of the time. No, Bruce Willis. Bruce Willis.

John Malkovich. John Malkovich. He's a villain a lot of times. Bruce Willis. That English guy from... Jason Statham. Statham. Those are the two examples.

No, but there's something else. Vin Diesel. Vin Diesel. Those are the three. Woody Harrelson. Woody Harrelson examples. No, but there's something else. Vin Diesel. Vin Diesel. Those are the three. Woody Harrelson.

Woody Harrelson. He's played a bit. John Travolta. Travolta. Are you gonna debate me that typically villains are bald? Lex Luthor. Right. What about Lex Luthor?

Oh, you think he's a villain? We probably have different perspectives on that. You see, I see Superman as an alien invasion who's here and not playing by any of our governmental rules. Trump? I think it's Trump. I think Superman should be fucking sent back to Krypton. I haven't seen any of his paperwork

and this guy takes it upon himself to deal with our criminals, intergalactic or otherwise. I don't know, can we start on this? Yeah, you're right though. I don't like to go political, dude. Lex Luthor was not, he was the guy trying to say, wake up, wake up America, Superman's here, and we don't know what the fuck this guy

wants to do with anything. We're just taking his word for it, he's a good guy. Oh, is he? He was the first mega. Kansas. That's where Trump got all his, Lex Luthorhor the fucking misunderstood hero Yeah, I like he just took Batman versus Superman he took Batman's side

Yeah, what are you doing? Round two. Round two of the perell? Yeah, now I gotta get down to the I gotta get down to the uh, Whenever the dermal level is below epidermis. Why don't you just get a lighter and light your hand on fire? Oh, Christine, throw me my Zippo? You wanna see something cool? I'm gonna be like Nikki Sixx in fucking 87. You touched my balls. What a commitment.

For the bit. We could've faked it, nobody's watching. It's not even video. You could've just faked it. We did. We did. Yeah, dude. Oh yeah. I didn't do anything. Yeah, dude. Oh, yeah.

I didn't do anything. That would be crazy. Did you already put it? That would be crazy. Shut up, Lou. That would be so crazy to touch your ball bag for real. Yeah.