The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Truck Stop Hot (feat. Andy Fiori)

Episode Date: June 9, 2021

Bonfire family member Andy Fiori of the DYM Podcast joins Jay and Dan on the show as they analyze a video of a woman showing up with the goods at the wrong door.Stream "The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson & Dan Soder" for 3 months free on the SiruisXM app! Offer Details Apply: www.SiriusXM.com/BonfireFollow us on all social media @TheBonfireXM@DanSoder www.DanSoder.com@BigJayOakerson www.BigJayComedy.com@AndyFIori www.andyfiori.com#CrackleCrackle

The Bonfire. It's the Bonfire, serious XM, Faction Talk 103. I'm dead, so that's Big Joe, Crescent Black Lou out, but the rest of the crew here, Jacob, DJ Lou, and Christine, we had a clip that we were going to obviously, regular Bonfire fashion. Is Fiori coming? Is Fiori coming? Merck face isn't? He's coming on at six. Obviously regular baller fire fashion is fewer is fury coming Merc face isn't he's coming on at six. All right. Tell me to tell him to come on now Well, this is what make him wait now now he's got a way through a seven minute commercial break

When he comes on at six for seven minutes of those minutes What's going to be in Check it one of the times. Check it. Come on. Check it. Check it. Check it. Check it.

Now it's time to see if you can come on now. Yeah, because like we, uh, it's a fun subject. We have a couple good ones here. Hmm. What comes on now? Damn. I could listen. CRAAAAHHHH!

I didn't know Santa! Uh, and the mer- Going in the door. Going in the door. Go in the door. What's up? You can. You can. You can. that was horrible. I don't want to be stuck in a vortex like that ever again

By the way the last three were both of us giving way to the other one. Yeah, and that makes even worse a gut No, no, it's no it's no and then when you realize that you're fighting for nothing important to say You know fire remember anymore. anymore it was oh I do DJ Lou said before the break he goes you want to come back with cry little sister by Marilyn Manson I was like I think we can Support him now No, it's still on going case now yeah

No, I mean look. I mean I can't do anything. I got these lyrics so I am not much I could do about that Yeah, well they're there now you can just say you made them up. This is where you steal it Well, it's funny to say that it's funny to say that I go What can I do about these tattoos? I don't want anymore me while I've gotten all kinds of other tattoos covered Which reminds me of our way waited for Andy to come on, is Howard Stern covered this so well. So I don't even, but just the concept of it, that Casey Anthony over the weekend. Did you hear this, Lou? Casey Anthony over the weekend.

Like someone threw a drink on her to bar and she called the police and then stare and just go through the whole thing. And there's like a whole thing is like she didn't call the police when her child got abducted and someone threw a drink and she was, hi this is Kayney the Andy. I like to report someone menacing me in a place. It's so funny her calling the police. Oh, hey, but staring was doing how hot she is still like she's still smoking hot and he's like and people were calling in and saying like in Which by the way I would take a call from if as possible from someone if they see KC Anthony just parties around

I guess wherever she's from West Palm or Tampa Yeah in Florida. Yeah, and people like say they see people are calling and saying they see her all the time and Stern just doing his mother Telling her that he's dating like Like why are you dating Casey Anthony? You know, to just crack me half hour, maybe half. That's a thing where you don't realize, I remember one time I met one of like the cast members from real-world Seattle at Eastville in like 2008. I was drunk and I was just like, oh, you look like that girl from real-world Seattle. She's like, that was me. And I was like oh you look like that girl from real world Seattle. She's like that was me

And I was like holy shit. That's fucking crazy. I can't imagine if you're just at a bar in Florida And you're like man, you look like that girl whose kid. Oh my god. You are her I'd buy you a drink, but you look like that Eileen Warnos. I am Eileen Warnos. Whoa Was that monster? Yeah. Nice. Nice. There you go. You don't mean I brought you. Are you Eileen Warnos? And she goes, I'm Charlize Theron. He goes, right. Right. Right. Well, you clean up. Anyway, you're still fucking for cash or what? Where's where's Wednesday at? Where's the girl from Adam's family?

Where's the Adam's Adams family? Where's the Adams family chick? With the nox. Where's Wednesday with the nox? Big ol' fat nox. Man, she left old Benjamin and he went, he's building a refuge for his podcast followers out. That's all I owe or something. That's why you can't fuck any of the Adams family. It'll turn crazy. I heard folks, Chris, Chris, I heard she sucked his brain out. Yeah. I heard Bugsley's dick made a couple women go wacko. Oh, Pudsy. Pudsy. Pudsy Pugsley. Whatever. He's his fucking. He's his busting him up. No, it was putt. It was Pugsley. I was just

calling it Pudley. His Pudley. His fucking fagley is pudley. His fat little puddley. Do I know I have that fucking song stuck in my head cry a little sister? I'll tell you what if I look dead on it'll say I have a Corey fell dog go to. Wow. So how much would you not like me with a joke with just a go to? I wish you hate that. Tell me a little bit.

Look at this. Huh? Not my favorite look. What do you mean? with a joke with just a go to how much would you hate that talking a little bit like jishen huh? not my favorite look what do you mean then I'll shave my top my headball and I'll be a total dad I still cool enough to have the go T.C. I got the coat I I did the little go T last night when I was whacking off the beard when I was jerking off my beard you're whacking it off you know making a feel nice for you when you're taking a while. When I shaved it off though, I went goatee and then into mustache. You know, is it just a picture of the goatee?

I did one time. I did it. I did last night. Yeah, I'm a last one. You said we had a last one. The last one. The whole trucker. Yes, some handlebars.

I never take my mustache or I never take my, I should say, my beard mustache off. So, I can never explore that I can never explore anything else oh you're right you have to do the thing where oh I haven't done it since the first time I grew it out that was when I really took the pictures of all I mean I'm not gonna lie man mustache Dan oh yeah no you it works you could have been a mustache cut you're not holding it to the camera okay I took off the self view so I don't never see it you have a character where you had just a mustache like way way long time ago no I wish though who Dan I thought Dan did something with just a

mustache you support guys who bang kids then, huh Dan? Oh, all right, that's fucking my guess with that mustache. I'd say you got a nice Mark Marin there and it works for you, it really does. I'd suggest actually, when you get older, to go with something like that. The fucking mustache, Soul Patch combo?

Not the Soul Patch necessarily, but like a heavy stash. And then some like thinner like beard hair. Yeah, dude. I wouldn't mind that at all That was my dad had a great mustache. I'd never saw my dad without his mustache not once you never seen me without a beard Mustache, I know dude. It won't happen about that I always think about my friends like dancing. Traumaans got a big beard and long hair And I was like what would happen if we just whacked all that off? Just if I got all that off, if I just jacked, jerked it all on.

If I took my, man, if I shaved my facial hair off for something, because I had to, I would do the thing I had to do. And then I would not leave the house to do, I would not perform for sure until it grew back in at least a little bit until you had a safe amount of hair on yeah just enough to give the impression of a jawline and neck. So like there you go and I'm complete in rety. Yeah you don't put it a comic book out or a cartoon without the shading you know I mean do you you don't you know yeah absolutely don't is fury coming on we're vamping

We're killing right. Yeah, sorry Well, what's he taking his sweet ass time for it was his birthday on heads up guys. It was his birthday on Saturday Probably gonna make it like it was a big deal. He's a real diva in the green room. Oh my god I bet Is where how is the food Pittsburgh? I'm going to heal helium this weekend where I think it's gonna be all sliders again Are they still doing just that? No, I got chicken fangers in Indianapolis. Yeah, they have chicken fingers and sliders. Oh, yeah, I think that's what it is But they don't have like any other stuff around there though a lot of restaurants around there

And there's probably not a bunch of fucking middle school kids giving a two hour wait to everything. Oh great. I don't get to get to hang on middle school kids. No dude, you missed out. Sorry bud. All the cool birthday parties were the weekend. I was gonna practice kidnapping.

I figured it's a good place. Well, oh there he is. Old Diva birthday boy himself. I got a question. Does Andy Fury shred? Oh yeah, diva birthday boy himself. I got a question. Does Andy Fury Shred? Oh, yeah, look clearly in the background, he does. Sorry, dude. Sorry, thanks, Andy, thanks for taking the break.

You're calling while you cool your fingers off in ice water. Does Andy Fury Shred? And also, does he not give two fucks about wire management on his entertainment? Damn. I'll give a shit about any of this. Wire management is real big for Jay.

It's something that I'm very nervous about in my new apartment. Oh, buddy, Dan, you better hear it. I'm gonna say something right now. You know what, dude? Wire management means a lot to me, but my house is not, is not good on wire management. Either we're not. We could do that. It normally means a lot to me too, and I'm just so fucking lazy

It's so I'm saying but on my wire management in my house is a lot it's a lot of us being hidden by It's just not it's not good the profile of my television and entertainment setup is a God damn mess if I'm being From being truthful it hurts Well, but you need to I do like that your quality control among us. That does make me feel good. No, I got to kind of step up my game Yeah, I'm gonna point out to you if you have bad wire management, but I'm just calling to you from a friendly place of I too and guilty of some improper wire management Yeah, all right. Well, that makes me feel better. Thank you very much. But yeah, you guys know I shred I we shredded That makes me feel better. Thank you very much. But yeah, you guys know I shred I we shredded We did it for a second live concert. I swore to guy. I thought you were having a stroke

You know we shredded on I still don't know Jay's mouth is dropping. I would just say crash test dummies, what I would say, because it's the only song. Yeah, I forgot who it was. Yeah, we did it song. Let's go see. Yes, buddy. J and I are walking to the parking garage. I was doing that. Nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, Hey, Mark face. I know. You single.

Yeah. All right. I'm saying you probably were fucking, I mean, you are like a Pittsburgh 10 of a guy. Pittsburgh 10. Yeah. They felt skinny there, dude. I can ask you a question, McFase. I left shoot. I had an early flight.

So I left the room around 1215. Right. In the morning. You were fucking boozing. You were doing all Danny Soats. You're doing a shot of whiskey and a beer combo. So I'll three of those have. I was a little whiskey hard. What time was this? This is about 12. After the second show. After the second show, he started getting after it. Okay. Damn, man, come on. Give it a kick. No judgment.

Zero judgment. I went back to the hotel. My question is, you went back to the hotel without him. Yeah, because I had to flight it for him. So we were hung out. Like three. Yeah. Oh, did you have friends?

Yeah, he was. I had my college roommate lives in Pittsburgh and then Seneca Stone, who was a cool dude and a great host, liked to get after it just as much as I did. And they were like talking about it, kind of like they were talking dirty to each other the whole weekend. Where they're like, this Saturday we're gonna drink, right?

And he's like, yeah, in Saturday we're gonna drink, right? Cause I don't know who's before I go on stage. You gonna fill the building up? You're gonna fill it up? All right. You're gonna fucking do it to me? Yeah, you're gonna fucking do it to me. And then I got off stage and you know,

I started smoking a joint and then they The drinks started coming and I Got stoned and walked back to the hotel and my question to you is mercface How do you get that? It's like wet sits right across the parking lot? It's like you got a walk around the movie theater. It's a fucking hike. And that's what I'm in it walk. I know it's so. And drunk man. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. I'm a fun drunk. Be Andy. Always be Andy. But we I knew the walk stone at 1215 was a long walk. Did you walk it or did you get

driven driven there? We got driven there because we had a few more drinks with my buddies at the club and then Garrett, one of the managers at the Pittsburgh improv, was like, let's go to my buddies bar. Hop in. So then he drove me and Seneca and my buddy to a very downtown Pittsburgh steel bar. And we hung out there until like three. And then I went, damn, got you home, yeah. How hung over were you that Sunday? Not too bad actually, pretty good.

It was okay. That's pretty normal, pretty good. I'm breathing more smooth. Yeah, exactly Jacob. I can't, I can't. I can't. Thanks for bringing me along, it was great. I had a great time.

I'm so like, what I hear, I get anxiety for you when it's like, dude, let's go to my buddy thanks for bringing me along. It was great. I had a great time. I'm so like what I hear I get anxiety for you When it's like dude, let's go to my buddy's bar hop in. I'm like, I'm already this is where I like I'll make an excuse It'll be like a lie probably that's music to my ears. I know I remember I remember that fucking kind of whistle call When I was drinking on the road and someone would be like you know, there's another place I'm like well then we got it. Yeah, but not drinking after hours, not not drinking. I'm always like, uh, yeah, I want to go home right now. I just, I've been in the show.

Did you want on the road? You would run around because I got to say, I remember going on the road with you and Lewis and Lewis went and did it. And me and you just went back to the hotel. Yeah. You know why is because that night before, threw me, like if we would have done a weekend, I would have gone out one of those nights, but the second night,

when we did the show in North Carolina, I didn't like my set, and so I got sad drunk, which means I'm up fast and then down quicker, and you were like, do you just wanna sit in the room and order Taco Bell and watch TV, and I was like, that's all I wanna do right now. And and you were like, do you just want to sit in the room and order Taco Bell and watch TV and I was like, that's all I want to do right now. And then Lewis was like, we're gonna go to, it was a club.

They were going to a club and I was like, I have zero interest to go into a club. Had a been a bar, might have gone. But a club I was like, absolutely not. But we sat eight on Friday night. We had a sat eight. Yeah, it was a happy sat eight. I told the story yesterday on the show about how we were just fucking went

to Wendy's got shut out McDonald's. Every move we made was wrong was the wrong one. Every move, every move we made and then we went and got a fucking get go sandwich and you got the worst thing on the menu. I really did that one poorly. You got a chicken. Got a fucking pepperoni chicken parm. That's what's Fuck to me. I was fucking gas It was like a yeah, it was like a lesser lesser quick check Quick check quick check wall wall any of them. I'm not getting a grilled or breaded chicken sandwich ever No, I don't even get the cheese stick. I don't get the cheese stick from wall. You're going It's only I got only you can do a meatball you can do a meatball

But other part of my order what you did not see was the mozzarella sticks you what fucking weirdo By the way, what's wrong with that they were I don't know I'll tell you something As long as you got a good oil deep fryer, you could fucking, you could wear some mozzarella sticks. My deli does mozzarella sticks that I would say are, I'm right up there with these mozzarella sticks. I just wouldn't do it because it's too late with my late 30s heartburn. I just know.

I know, but dude, we were so hungry. And dude, dude, I was ordering out of hunger and frustration. So man, we were so frustrated, Jay, that we want the get go was right next to the Taco Bell when we got shut down. It was in the same parking lot. Yeah. The Taco Bell was just like, we weren't making that one. We didn't make the window.

It was one, it was like 155. We were in under last call, but there was no way we were making it up to the window. Did you get birthday laid, dude? No, I got in Pittsburgh drunk. Dude, there was nobody at this buddy. Andy, but you have a week of free flowing booze. Andy, what about the tattoo artist? Oh, yeah, dude, this was so funny, Jay, this girl, this hot tattoo artist was in the crowd. I didn't meet her. Putzenica and Andy did.

And they said that she was like, she just came up to Andy and she's like, I just all over him. But she was at the table with another guy. Like, well, because I went to the back after after I think the late show on Saturday, I went to the back just to watch a little bit of your set. And I sat down on like one of the empty tables. And she just got right. There's empty tables. Whatever one empty table was the one empty table. So there's empty tables. Whatever one empty table was the one empty table So what there's empty tables I had to see the tables that she was from I went with the one closest to me. So one of the curtained off sections

I was calling her the Pittsburgh Natalie Cuomo because she was right up my alley. Yeah, she was cute tattooed Fucking Brunette and but here's the thing so Santa got the hose comes over and he was like I'm feeling good about it. I'm like yo, this fucking shits all tattooed up Fucking took selfies with me and shit. I'm feeling this and he goes. Yeah, she did the same thing with me I'm like, oh fuck her Little birthday heartbreak dude. Did he message you yesterday? You're a compliment, dude, you're confident to do. If you already think that I think selfies of people all the time, I never

think that people take selfies of me means they're looking to fuck. I've never. She was talking to me. She came over and sat like with me at the table, got real close. And it was like asking me where I was from and shit. If I'm leaving town tomorrow, she'd give me a free tattoo. If I wanted that was Jay, that was the joke I made was that she kept being like, let me tattoo you.

Let me tattoo you kept she kept saying that to him and I was like, dude, this is like in middle school when the kids will grab your arm and be like, I'm going to draw on you and you're like, okay, whatever. And I'm like, we're just going to get her tattoo guinea pig. She's like, yeah, I hit on these fucking shubby dudes and they let me tattoo them That's how I get my apprenticeship She goes, I wait for the clowns to get off stage and then I fucking lure them into me drawing all Take it I take Andy at his word. I think Lou will agree and he's quite a coxman. Oh

Well, I appreciate that. Yeah, I don't know It's the quality matters at all, but he takes it shot. I'll take my shooters, got shoot, Lou. Yeah, you feel it. I wish cock around. So the host texted me yesterday, he goes, dude, I stopped by my lunch sandwich shop and the dude who was always there, nice dude says, Hey, man, you still in my girl? So I guess like his deli guy was her boyfriend because she was sitting with that dude the entire show. You, I told you that.

She had a boyfriend in the audience and then when he's right, I didn't see that guy. Yeah. Like Andy, you don't want to get killed on your birthday and fucking Pittsburgh. What do you think of that? What do you think of that woman, Dan? I don't mean her particularly, that particular thing. I do see that a lot.

People come over and they're extraordinarily flirty, real flirty, in front of their boy, and it's just like a weird like, I don't know, man, it's a very odd thing. Yeah, it feels very like, okay. Like, what's the thing of this? Like, what's the, you know what I mean? Yeah, that's a thing where immediately

there's zero pleasure to be had because if you're empathetic at all, you feel bad for the boyfriend. Right. And if you also don't want to like, yeah, you also, yeah, you also don't want to go to the guy. It's like, what's up with your chick, bro? Yeah.

Dude, whatever, does she, does she love Aspen Cologne? Cause I'm drenched in it. I'm not talking about a female who's a fan that brought their husband or boyfriend. That happens plenty. I'm talking about just whatever that is. Even on a date where it's just like overly, like I just think about myself being on a date

and the girl, like an early date, early dating experience, couple months and the girl goes and sits on another guy's lap or something like that. And you're like, even for a picture, you're just like, yo, like what do you do? Yeah, like it's a weird. Apparently this was their second date. This was Senate.

It's all those the follow up. Oh, yeah. We went out. That was a second date. Oh, damn, it was fucked up by a deli worker, dude. Damn, dude, he's about to cut you like cold cuts. Not me. Oh, man.

Yo, but you remember what's with a pepperier turkey? Is that good, damn? She, yeah, she DMed me after the show. Do you remember what she DMed? She did? What are you doing after the show? We should go to Yokoso and get sushi and drinks on me? That's the exact text That kind of thing that kind of like it's the sushi Why don't you tell her to come over to your room and you give her you feed her some shashimi and then set a picture your pasty white dick I'm not that com How about have a little shashimi strike you

Now we didn't want to go over there. We're all hanging out at a good time and we all once we figured out I know you guys of course you guys in what plus you don't want to put in your birthday. That's stupid You're right. Yeah, you're right. That's so dumb when you break down our yes, who's with a dude? Yeah, thank God she had a boyfriend cuz you would have fucking ruined your night by fucking you You're hanging out at that sausage party at some guy's friends bar J twist and turns things I know guys friends bar. Jay twist and turns things. I know. I'll just touch each other. Something. Come on. Oh, you guys, because you know, some of guys do with your birthday. Let me get touched up. If this Garrett is so cool, as you say, I don't

only work that in prof. If this Garrett is so cool, why didn't he give you a little H.J. for your birthday? What he did. He goes. That would have been mountain man on mountain man. Oh my God. The gruffness. You know what he did. He goes. Mountain man on mountain man. Oh my God. The gruffness. You guys would have started a first fire. A big beard's down there.

You guys just kissing those beers rubbing. It would have set the fucking that woodsie city on fire. There's a gay couple fans of ours in Philadelphia, dude. And they look like mountain men. They're great.

They're great. Blanking on his name right now. It was great dude. And I love that they smash into each other like rams Do they look like two fucking grizzly? Well, the the front line for mastodon Day that's awesome. Yeah real duck dynasty look

Are you ready to fuck by the way? I just got a text. It was just named Nicole Yokech NBA MVP. No, yeah Nicoli O'Kitch, NBA MVP. No, uh. Yeah. Woo! Buddy! Unbeaten was too many games. Yeah, it was the injuries that hurt the NBA this season.

But, O'Kitch got the fucking NBA. Did they give him a lot though now? It's getting defensive player there. I think that's a good one. Simmons. All I know is that someone texted me about the MVP. I don't know about everything else. I'm worried about old fucking flabby arms after we've lost the

sons. Well, we got fucking beat up last night by the Phoenix Sons in game one. So how bad? They fucking beat the shit out of us in the fourth. I got home from Skanks and was watching it and the nuggets were up one and it was one of those things where the sons went on such a run that I was like I I changed my shirt and then that didn't do anything and they kept blowing them out. And I'm like, I don't think I should have watched this second half. I truly feel like I lost game one for the nuggets. And I'm sorry. You superstitious like that. Oh, yeah.

I'm pretty calm and cool on Thursday. We're watching game six. Yeah, but I was very nervous. If game would have started hitting, I would have gotten a little because they were down like 15 at one point. You see him pretty calm. It's pretty high and excited for sandwiches. Sixers. That's true. The man's team brothers. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Little overrated if you're asking me. Oh, I wasn't going to say it. I wasn't going to say it. But you thought it though, right? I thought it. Of course, dude. But that's a sad for me. It's out on your rings on your fucking peanut butter and jelly. So whatever it fucking is. Well, we found out you know why they do that.

Bologna. Yeah, we got who's got Friday. We got side fried bolognes. Why'd you do that? We both put we both put two down. Are you black latch key kids? Why did you do that? Don't worry about it. Do you were finding our soul? I had to add. Dan. I was like, yo, does fried bologna sound good? I think it does. I'm the one to pull the trigger on that Jason. That's gross Why don't you why don't you cook the hot dog and unravel that while you're at it. I would love to love a flat Have you read a cold hot dog? Yes. Have you read a cold hot dog? Yes, right out of the package. Yeah, I swore to God right now I swore to God. I'm grossed out by you like it's actually a tick on our friendship. I judge that hard dude

You took a fucking hunk out of it. You didn't do you did you didn't call you didn't do now you didn't why would you you can in one minute later It'll taste like a hot dog. Oh wait Come on Christine what's wrong with you? Tell me you were practicing deep-throating and it just happened Hey, what if I told you I was practicing anal okay, okay? That's right. You didn't tell me how you ingested it you just said it got in you I was going to ATM now if I'm jamming a hotdog up my ass is going in cold Oh, you know what?

No, you're right. You probably should warm it up first. No, I'll tell you why too, because when it's cold, it might snap up in there. And you can pull out one, bro. Well, how about opposite if you get it, if you might go over too much, you might pop in your butt.

You might get a grease pop. Oh, no, that's not nice at all. Oh, a grease pop. I think it's a little sizzle dizzle on the inside. Yeah, if you go take a grease load, dizzle on the inside. Yeah, yeah. If you go take a greaselow, greaselow right in your shooter. Damn, I don't like that at all.

That sounds terrible. But I wonder if anybody's actually practiced anal before they had anal. Probably tried. Oh, sorry. I thought we were all raised around it. Yeah. Oh, I mean, a walkthrough?

That's what we call it. We call it a walkthrough, that's what we call it. We call it a walkthrough. You mean, try without a dick for, I'd have to assume 90% of people who engage actively in anal sex, try with something else first, their own fingers if nothing else. Right. Well, ding dong ditch before you go in for the real thing. Yeah. Now, you got to see what's going on up in there, or I assume,

at the very first peak of a head getting in your ass, so you're already like, it's wrong, everything's wrong, it's wrong. Like, you have to get used to the wrong of it. Oh, dude, that was like when I got that rectal exam from that Romanian doctor, and she was like, put it in, I was like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,

if you pain, go to proctologists. And I was like, no, I just, I've never had that feeling before, and she was like, put it out like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. It was during, no, she was a GP general practitioner and I was, it was a snow snow. Posing is one. Yeah. Yeah, she's just, she's in it for the kicks, but I had my snow boots on and I'll never forget my snow boots. Just still were on when she fucking gobbled on all that lube and shoved her fingers up my ass.

Why does snow boots make it so much more innocent? You just heard the rubber, the heavy rubber of the souls. Dan, did we do, I'm so thrown off of Pam and recording we're doing, but an pre-recorded, did we show the porn star, the bunch porn star? Yeah, we did change. We did. We did it on the show. Yeah. And then we brought it up. Okay. Yeah, we did. We did it. We did it. We did get to this. Yeah, we didn't know.. Okay. Yeah, we did. We did it. We didn't get to this. Yeah, we didn't know. I mean, please, we can't do it now because then it blows the reveal. We'll show them on commercial break. But let's, let's do the video that we were going to bring up of the wrong hotel room, which we brought us yesterday. And then I talked

about getting into the wrong car of Vegas, but this woman to let Andy know this woman was supposed to meet someone in a hotel room and she went to the wrong door. Okay. That's it. We've watched this yet. Yeah, it's a quick video. Hello. It's Megan.

Megan who? The one with all the awesome stuff for you. What kind of stuff? Coffee pussy and juice? In that order? Take her out. Next door, honey. Next door.

I'm so happy I didn't wash that because right now, my favorite part of this video is her realizing, when he said next door first time she was still like what and then when he says next door honey she has a real like it's reminiscent of the video of the girl catching a load on her face and realizing she's on camera she goes like okay that's a weird thing this hey to somebody. Oh boy. Yowee. It's got a real playful delivery banter down too. It's like bringing all the good treats for you.

Got all the good stuff. Siggaret's pussy. By the way, she didn't even put pussy first. No, she put it in the coffee. Pussy, juice. Cherry gummies. Covey tea. Covey tea, Sega, yeah,

who long tea and, uh, mama, Celeste pizza, pitch up some hot tamales, not the food the candy. Got some big league chew, got a hot mouth to fuck started over. Yeah, please Hello, it's Megan Megan who? The one with all the awesome stuff for you. What kind of stuff? Coffee pussy and juice

cigarette next door next door next door Next closet you see that titty tattoo coming out. I know the two tat voice when I hear one Of course you see a creeping out because when she did this it gave away her titty tat That's what I looked for is when she was like this Pussy Backround on this was just the no it was awesome ladies going around trying to win the voter whatever town This is but here's we have to assume She's got she went to the wrong door and she said it's Megan Megan with all the good stuff for it

So she's definitely this is someone I mean you look at her. She is she's fucking She's truck stop garbage, but I mean look at the motel, she's adding even stuff. So she's just like, I think it's an apartment complex. Yeah. The guy getting it and bringing like coffee and cigarettes. Because she's coming over to his house, because this is a ring.com. So I think it's like this guy's got a former sponsor.

I think he's got a ring doorbell, and that's where this whole thing's recorded. Also, well, this could have been It's could have been an agreement with a hooker But it also actually may have just been because she's like not a good-looking girl. So It's might have been like an agreement to come over to fuck somebody like on like a tender or something Yeah, and he was like if you're stopping could you grab all of the Probably actually where it is probably more than a hooker. Yeah, like she made a run for him and came over to fuck yeah

Yeah, probably sit by the way probably said probably said I could use some coffee Probably say if you get orange juice. I have vodka Uh store and cigarettes. I'll tell you what dude. I think I'm backwards pieced this together Jay you just fucking a beautiful mind to that realness Yeah, I think they need coffee to stay awake. I need booze, I'm gonna fuck you, so bring some juice so I can just jug down some vodka. And then I'm gonna need to rip a few butts

and then I have to look into that fucking, that fucking. Also, I'm gonna need that back pack. I'm gonna need that back pack of that hat, just to fucking think about what we did. I'm gonna need to stand outside and smoke in the cold weather When she gets when she got to the right door he was like, did you fucking know my neighbor's door? Did he see your face? God damn it And that was my wife

Is do we think this guy the neighbors used to it because he was like next door honey? Oh my god, I don't know what the fuck stop pigs. Hey, Megan. Sorry. You're at the wrong place. That's Earl next door. You'll do it. Also, do you think this guy's gay because of the honey? That's what I thought. That was my baby started over. I want to get a good story. Sweetie. All right. Oh, he goes, uh, another 6.5 rock. Another another 5.5 on the Richter scale coming over to rock my neighbor Earl. Keep it moving you, chuch. Why don't you how about next time you bring me a little coffee with some Bailey's in it when I have to listen to you fucking land monsters bang.

Sorry if it was Rose and a thick hearty, I would invite a div. Sorry honey you lose about 40 pounds, get some abs and turn Latino. Oh, shit. What's about 40? You want some goals, sweetheart? I'll give you a couple goals. Try a cardio. It's called cardio, bitch. They sell them. They sell them so small, you put them in your goddamn house now. I probably realize you probably sweat nicotine

But it wouldn't hurt What's your blood type camel lights Oh shit during the twink store bell. Yeah, he's an opinionated little que feini. Well get in here, princess What mega is it? Ready for a hot mouth. Can you bring me? Yeah. Yeah. Bring the juice. Oh, right. Oh, you got troppocana.

That's all right. I'm a pulp. pulp. Yeah. Yeah. Full pulp guy. Well, I'll swallow if you do. If you choose full pulp by the full pulp, by the way,

I think you are a like a lunatic. Yeah, I think you like swimming in swamps It's just crazy. It's like crazy. Do you want to eat the it's like it's like yeah, I'll eat a few time in time if I want this Do you pull the stuff? Yeah, I don't I pull all that shift off the orange dude I only buy weed with sticks and stems in it so I could fucking put all the seeds out Dude I only buy weed with sticks and stems in it so I could fucking put all the seeds out so Exactly. I'll play this lady for the beginning one more time. Who is it? Hello.

It's Megan. Megan who? The one with all the awesome stuff for ya. What kind of stuff? Coffee pussy and juice. I have something awesome for you, lady. A chin. Move on. I didn't know a mouth could be connected to a channel.

It's a sense of style. What are you, a xenobite? I would never cut you, but I'm afraid I'd hit you in the heart Try to punch into face hitting the goddamn tini. Sorry, mole lady. You're gonna need to go Hey, see lion head move on that's next door that creep shit happens Sorry, that's of course. Yes to go next door and fucking guy where that guy is gonna definitely hear if that guy was a legend He would have filmed them He would have filmed them fucking yeah, like like the audio of them fucking in the next room Because Megan makes some fucking Megan makes some real oofs when she's fucking for sure

Megan makes some real oofs when she's fucking for sure Oh dude, that's cool Can I tell you right now? The thing that made me think that she gives God to your head was that laugh Where she went, where she went What kind of awesome stuff was she went? Huh Yeah, like, oh man, I bet you spit into your hand before you do it I'm telling you, it's gonna be sloppy then, but it's not gonna be what you're thinking

I tell you what it's gonna be filled with A lot of stopping to hand swipe her nose, which is gonna be sloppy then, but it's not gonna be what you're thinking. I tell you what it's gonna be filled with. A lot of stopping to hand swipe her nose, which is gonna be gross. Like, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. No, it's just gonna be a lot of stopping for weird shit. She's gonna say something about, she goes, she has to check it. She goes, I gotta check this, might be my kids. Yeah, sorry, sitter. It's a sitter beeping me. You go. You like? Just check it. It's my ex boyfriend. She looks like this. She goes. Yeah, it's just work

Yeah, dude that was Yeah, she's an oof to that. I love I love Megan. I think Megan's an angel. I'm Megan's a good time Megan's a cool time Yeah, just that laugh made me think that she's such a good time. She's got a body like a real lady stretch marks on all appendages I'll tell you what she's she's seasoned She's for sure. She's a you know the tread my old easy as it was. I would say hard. That's a hard 31. I was going to say a rough and tumble 36. I was going to say a rough and tumble 36. Bring it up. Bring it up.

A liberal estimation. 31. Yeah, I thought possibly even for the late 30s as well. Yeah, the signs were all there. I mean she definitely obviously has some miles on it. I mean that tattoo is 25 years old. Look out dark and look how fucking dark and all together the ink has become. God, she got that when Trent Rezner was just sexy and hot in the 90s. Let's watch her walk. Oh, She walks away. Yeah, dude. Ruff. Kind of a cute screen grab right there. Wait, go back.

You can. Yeah. Something there's bad. Something there. Yeah, this feels like Aurora. Here's the thing from dead on. It's disguise that she has the weakest of chins. Yeah, but you can see how with some clever tender photography, of course, you could get

duped by this real. Of course, she's not one with eyes. I got for the good. Anything. She's got, she got almond shaped eyes. That's nice. Dude, it's funny. When you do the frame by frame here, it's like, as you get one drink deeper and deeper, the better she gets.

She looks. Listen, also the guy she's fucking, the guy she's fucking the guy she's fucking she is going like he's gonna be thrilled The what for sure she pulls her eyes backwards. She goes the one with all the awesome stuff Stuff for yeah, did you park in the lot over there? It's free. You guys parking for Really start to start chatting them up to for some like there's the other guy also sound gay because we've just assumed this guy is gay from his voice and stuff So like you know, I mean he's like hello, and you're just megas Megan Hill Is this mark you think she would have said first like is this uh? Yeah, right this marks place

Before she threw out I'm here to give you pussy That's why I thought it was some sort of code for Hooker. You know, she just goes by Megan or something without even confirming it. Yeah, with all the good stuff. You're right, though, Jay. Chips and snatch. Are you Megan? She's like, who wants me to be? I can be Megan. Good pussy just because there's a bag of shit hanging in their face. That'd be stupid Let me just ridiculous. Yeah, that girl was crushing ass with a claw to be bag So this girl can definitely crush ass with a faded tit tattoo of pop-eye Yeah, dude

Like an anchor with an anchor with her fucking great uncle's name on it There's a way she brought a she would I shit on a drinks. Yeah That guy was really gay he'd open the door just snatch the snow cone. I'll take this though, honey Richard I got us some drinks. Oh my god. Is that an icy like the brand icy grab it? That's a blue one You know, it's so hot outside. It just really realized how much I'm in the mood for a slushie or a fucking a slurpee. Dude, dude, get nuts. What's up?

Yeah, I, I got a new fucking hypothesis what's going on here. I think there might be multiple dudes next door because there is three coffees there of different sizes and a slushie. I'm saying at some point the conversation was Megan, do you and your faded tit tattoo want to do us a favor? Grab supplies for us. Four of us. Three of us, maybe because there's four drinks in there. Grab, uh, get one for yourself. Get yourself a slushy if you'd like. I'd prefer you not have

coffee breath. So if you could please. And then come over and me and my friends are gonna plug you up Until you can float until you could have definitely float. There's not even sex involved. Maybe you know, she's just scared of stuff She's like I'm a pussy. I got a coke Coffee coffee coffee Pussy juice She was a pussy. He's a coffee pussy juice. Oh, terrified of things. Whatever. I have to face my fears chips. I got a chips fears.

I have to work. Unfortunately next to each other. Coffee pussy juice. Do the guy next door immediately just opened up with a robe on and nothing under it. And he's like, what took you so long? Why, Megan? I thought you were. Sorry, I stopped off.

I was talking to the Fag next door. Yeah. What are the games you're confusing? I'm not kidding, man. He took my slushy, the prick. Next, next, next, Jor, honey. Lover, who was it? I don't know.

Some pig for the guy. The one that dog wants to bark, egg. Let me guess, he went to Bruce's house first. I know. Yeah. Everybody said this thing. I'm gonna go to the other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the

other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the

other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the other side of the overman because of that twink. Please do not knock on his door again. Text me when you get here. I'll tell you the place again. I'll come out. I'll come out to the parking lot. I'm coming out. I'll come out to do not ring that bell. He is a bitch. He is a sassy

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