The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - War Pigs

Episode Date: April 12, 2024

Bobby needs a new vice and the group has many suggestions, including hunting wild boars.

And now the bonfire with Big Jay Okerson and Robert Kelly Bobby's not he's okay, but he's not well Something up with me dude and something's in hell There's something something up But I'm not well I don't feel anything But I don't feel right what feels wrong. I feel like I'm not well. I don't feel anything. But I don't feel right. What feels wrong? I feel like I'm a step behind. It's better not because this motherfucker just came in the room with that body. Yeah. Look at him putting his little pecs out. Look at that barrel chest. Man, on camera you look shredded.

In life you're a little boy. Did you see him just flex his tit? Yeah I did. He just flexed his right tit. Good. You see it? Did you see it curl up when he touched the thing? On camera dude, you're fucking shredded. In wrestling, you're a little Mexican wrestler. Oh yeah, you are a Lucha Libre. Yeah, you have to wear a mask.

Jacob Libre? Jacob Libre. Look at those, look at the little fucking arms. Oh, Jake Mysterio? Yeah, Jake Mysterio. Jake Mysterio Jr.? Yeah, put that on your head. What a stud.

Yeah, dude. I'm not feeling... Lou said he's feeling it. Black Lou said he's feeling it. Oh, shit. I got... But it's not... It's not a sickness. Like, I'm not... I don't feel sick. I feel... Seasonal depression? Yeah, dude, it might be.

Spring depression? I don't know it might be. Spring depression? I don't know, man. It's getting warm again. I don't know what it is. Saturday, I was walking around all day, couldn't get my energy, couldn't get, and I was like, oh, maybe I worked out too hard because I worked like three days in a row,

I worked out a lot. Humble brag. I mean, dude, I'm killing it. It's probably because I was fucking crushing it so hard at the gym. You know, guys, I actually think I understand what it is now. It's probably because I was fucking crushing it so hard at the gym I mean, you know guys I actually think I understand what it is now I went I clanged and banged so hard that now I'm paying the problem paying the ultimate price now But small price to pay for this. I kind of had to cuz in case Rogan stopped by

Oh, yeah, I did a little you always got to show him that you're fucking throwing up some fucking LBs Yeah, I brought a certain outfits for him just in case he showed up Joe is it cool if the green room could be clear between shows so I can do my little between show work now? And I get distracted if too many people were in the room. Yeah dude, I don't know what is. Couldn't get it back, yesterday I had it, today fucking couldn't get going.

There's something up. I don't know what it is. I don't know, I was like is my- Bad news with therapy? No, therapy was tough today, man. Me and the stuff, yeah. Stuff's going on, dude. Currently? I got, dude, I got so...

Way back in your brain. Let me tell you something, dude. I got so many, this is the problem with trying. Mm-hmm. I understand. I hate trying. Dude, I hate... Trying always makes me feel like I'm trying. I hate is the problem with trying. I understand, I hate trying.

I hate- Trying only leads to failure. Trying does, here's the thing, dude, when you try to better yourself, right? It's a waste of time. No. It's just, how do I explain it? So I get better, right? What makes me funny is the envy,

the rage, the hatred, the happiness, the silliness, the stupidness, all the bullshit. So when you take all that out, you try to get better, right? What am I gonna do, become a fucking pope? What am I, what am I, become a priest? Therapy does good for nobody. Well, I mean, look, I'm doing it. I mean, if you need it though, BetterHelp.

BetterHelp. If you do need it though, BetterHelp is the way to play. And they've also helped a lot of people, and it's a fantastic service. BetterHelp.com. But here's the thing, like, I don't plastic surgeon, plastic surgeon, plastic surgeon. I'm a plastic surgeon, plastic surgeon, plastic surgeon. I'm a plastic surgeon, plastic surgeon, plastic surgeon. I'm a plastic surgeon, plastic surgeon, plastic surgeon.

I'm a plastic surgeon, plastic surgeon, plastic surgeon. I'm a plastic surgeon, plastic surgeon, plastic surgeon. I'm a plastic surgeon, plastic surgeon, plastic surgeon. I'm a plastic surgeon, plastic surgeon, plastic surgeon. I'm a plastic surgeon, plastic surgeon, plastic surgeon. and just the tip and the top shaft in my late 30s. It was a hiccup in my 40s. It was a hiccup. But then I had food. I just went to food.

Food was my drug, man. I would go on the road and I would fucking find the best whatever and go and eat and stuff. My fat face and go to San Antonio this weekend, plug this weekend, Thursday, Friday, Saturday. L-O-L Comedy Club. L-O-L, I used to go there, I got the three pound honey bun. Huh?

It's a three, dude. Where? It's a diner. Why, that's so heavy in your hand. Yeah, you can't even pick it up. It's a three pound honey bun, I got that, and they have a chicken fried steak. One sitting?

No, I didn't eat the whole thing. You can't, you die. My feet would fall off. My feet would die. But I went there with mush, went right there after the show, got a three pound honey bun. Look at that thing. How about this, how about I suggest gambling?

Can't, can't gamble. I gotta buy a house. I can't gamble. Maybe get like a strange kink that's not sexual that you can satisfy like when you go on the road you have trans people pee on you Well, I think that might be cheating right? Nope. Is that cheating? I promise you I will promise you this right now I would make a bet with you. Yeah that dawn wouldn't have a problem Okay, if trans men trans men trans women trans women a woman with a a penis. I don't want, trans men is cross-dressing dudes. I don't want a Merchant Marine taking a hot oat piss on me.

No, no, no, a beautiful, beautiful lady with a big fat cock. Peeing on me. Just hanging a piss on you. I don't know if I want pee on me though. I don't like pee. Well, listen. I grow up. I didn't want cigarettes when I first started smoking them.

I made myself smoke. And then eventually I loved it. I should, I would love pee. I would love smoking them. I made myself smoke. And then eventually, I loved it. I should have. I would love to smell the popcorn and pennies. Yeah. Asparagus piss, that's the good stuff. You want a vice. I, look.

We can think of a vice right now that Dawn would be okay with. I need a vice. I need something, because I have nothing. Look, the Zin. We have cigars. Okay, the cigars are good, but you can only do one a day. I need something, because I have nothing. Look, the Zin. We have cigars. Okay, the cigars are good, but you can only do one a day.

I can't wake up and. You know. We've added Zin, which you shouldn't have. Zin is all right, but it's not even doing it for me anymore. No, it's not the thing. He needs the action. I need the action, I need the heat. Um.

Guns. I need to be able to walk away from something 30 seconds or less. What do you think Dom would get more mad at? You doing whack-off sessions with like cam girls or live tranny peeing on you? I can't do whack off sessions because if I edge too much, I hurt my pee pee.

Well, you know, nature of keeping cost effective too, I'd say don't edge too much, man. Pop when you pop. Yeah, but then what? Then I take a nap? Yeah. No, then I get sad. That's true. On the road now.

You gotta save it for late night. Yeah, dude. When I go on the road, what I was doing for, like, a while, I was just getting to the hotel room and whacking it out. And then later after the show, I try to do another. And it was like, I have to wait. I have to wait till the last minute. I'm about to go to bed and then I'll go on,

I'll go on, I'll start Googling some stuff. How about if your road kink becomes you watch other couples fuck? Dude, I type, I type. You don't get involved at all. I typed in stepmom, broken leg, shower. That's a good one. Couldn't get out?

I just wanted a helpless stepmom. Getting fucked by a stepson? No, but I wanted, you know, the, the, kind of let me help you and not to look and then they go, you know, stuff like that. Your dad's kind of a jerk. I know, he can be a jerk. I hate the way he treats you. You know, that type of thing. Okay, so what we'll do is we'll have couples fuck in front of you, but with a storyline.

But if couples fuck in front of you. Alright, listen, if you guys don't mind, if you wouldn't mind, you're a disgruntled wife, this guy's a plumber. You work at Costco you got caught stealing. You got to make it up or they're calling the cops. I don't know. If you watch couples fuck what? If I watch couples fuck I want to get involved. I can't, I can't. Okay. I don't have the ability to shut it down. So I guess, I guess this then just falls back down to having a trans woman piss on you. I gotta find something else.

There's gotta be something. There's gotta be something. Maybe I start antiquing? You have so many cool hobbies. I do have a cool hobby. He's talking about, I know exactly what he's talking about. It's not that. You get into shooting.

You're on the road. You're on the road. Yeah, like you got weed. Sure. You can just go out and get fucking basted. I was talking about this in therapy today. I can have some drinks, I can get loose. You can get loose, you can have some drinks, you can get, you go out and smoke a joint,

you get, just, I don't even know what that does to you anymore because I smoked weed when it was weed. I smoked weed when they grew it, they hung it, they dried it and they threw it. You had to smoke like seven joints to even get close to where you're at. Now you're there. This could be you, Bobby.

Oh God, Jay's showing me. No, don't do that. Don't suck it. Yeah, see, that's what would happen. I wouldn't be able to stop. I'd be like. Describe what we're seeing. That's a woman, a trans woman with a guy with a mask.

And the guy with the mask. How funny would it be if you'd seen a bonfire tattoo? It was me. And there you go, And then peeing. Oh, so you peed. This guy's. Some volume on these disgusting freaks. Yeah, dude, listen.

I don't. The volume's up. I don't want to get peed on. I don't, oh, why is it separated? Oh, the piss split. It already came. Why is it doing a piss, pee split? Maybe it has like, cum stuck.

Yeah. Okay, you're so adorable, Christine. She said that in baby talk. She went, maybe it has a cum stuck. Yeah. Okay, you're so adorable, Christine. She said that in baby talks. She went, maybe it has a cum stuck. Marshmellios! Maybe there's marshmallow stuck in the peel. I just can't. There's got to be something.

I'm trying to think of the where Dawn doesn't get upset. Gambling you said you can't do. Well, here's what I did. I was working out. You can't do light gambling? No, can't do light gambling. Because I flip out and I have bad luck. I don't have good luck. I'm not a gambler.

Okay. I went to Foxwoods once with Frosty and Dave Edwards, and fucking Dave Edwards, lucky fuck, had five dollar chips, thought they were one dollar chips, hit right away for like, you know, 1,500 bucks. I lost my page, all my money in my bank account, and I lost all the money I made on the college. Black came up 14 times.

In a row. And I just kept betting red, red, red. It came up the last time, I screamed in Foxwoods, no! I was sitting by a fountain crying. Frosty had to come over and do it, I'll get you more colleges, don't worry about it. I was so sad. I'll get you more colleges.

I was so sad. I did that once in Atlantic City. That show, Kev used to host at Sweet Cheeks, this crazy club. Yeah. And we went afterwards one time and gambled after the show and I like made 300 bucks and it took like an hour to get, it was so fun.

It was so, so fun. And then we went back the next time we did Sweet Cheeks and I was like, yeah, let's do it again. And there was no $5 tables now. There was $5 tables. There was $25 tables. And I lost my entire pay for the show, like, in four hands. There's nothing that hurts more than that. It killed me. It's like you just work for nothing.

I mean, that was like 300 bucks, but it was everything to me. It was everything to me. Mine was 75. Yeah. Yeah, but, dude, here's the thing, working out, like I went Thursday I worked out, Friday I worked out, Saturday I worked out.

I did a double, I did two a days on the weekends. Well, I was trying to get working out to be my thing. No. Well, Jay. You'd be a jerk off if that was you. If life, when you take a brick out of your wall, negative brick, you can't just leave it open. You have to replace it with a positive brick.

And let's say that brick has etched onto it. Yeah. A trans woman pissing on you. I don't think that's a positive brick. You don't have to do it in the mouth the way that freak was doing it. You don't have to be a fucking psycho scuzz like that guy sucking the dick and getting the pee.

Just a loose body piss. I don't even know how much that costs. That must be like 500 bucks. No, no, you're out of your mind. That's gotta be around 500. What? No sex. A trans woman comes over and hangs a piss on you

and then leaves. Should I call Norton and find out? Yeah. I wanna call Norton and find out. Yeah. I want to call Norton and find out. OK. I believe that it's time. Why don't you have him call the show? Yes. You want clean piss, so you have to test for that.

No, no, no. That's part of the excitement. What's the number to the show? We're pre-taped. No, Jacob. Oh, pre-taped. You see, that's the rush. They can drive, so they have the phones now.

That's what you're chasing. We don't have the phone. We don't have phones. We don't have phones. We're pre-taped. Oh, right. There's another live show going on. That's what you're chasing. We don't have the phones. We don't have phones. We don't have phones. We're pre-taped. Oh, right. There's other live shows going on. But they can't call into the show?

We were calling in as like Bennington shows going on. Yeah. Gotcha, they'd be calling in Bennington. That'd be funny if they called in Bennington and told Bennington how much. I know, buddy. I know. I was trying to look up hobbies for the road, and they're all lame.

What is it? Name one. Oh, they're gonna be so lame. Maybe go hunting pigs. What? Like fat chicks. See, I think you should go hunting because you're going to places that allow hunting in a lot of these states, so you should set up a hunting trip.

San Antonio. Wake up at 5 a.m. Why not? Go hunt, and then do your show. Go hog hunting. you'd love it. I don't know. You'd love that, Bobby. What?

You'd love that. I would love to go hunting. Okay, what are you gonna do when you're in San Diego? What are you gonna do when you're in fuckin' Albany? I go homeless hunting. In Virginia Beach, yeah, yeah, yeah. I just get a homeless guy. Take out the homeless.

If you make it out of the city before I get you. Yeah, survive. Oh, that's my new hobby. I survive the game. Yeah. Every city I go to. If you make it out of the city before I get you. Yeah, survive. Oh, that's my new hobby. I survive the game every city I go to. If you make it out of Albany before I get you, I'll Vemo you $150. Yeah, well, I do the shows, I sleep in as much as I can, and then during the day, I most dangerous game.

Oh. You're gonna hate these. What, name it, go ahead. I might like it, go ahead. Number one, learn a new language. Fuck off. But if you are gonna do that though, Babel is your source.

Babel, I already use Babel. Non paletano, molto bene. I learned everything already. Maffangul, Shvazza. Dule bakalau. You smell like fish. Shvazza is what Yiddish people say for black people. Manikom, mamalabichu.

Jacob knows. No, I don't want a new language, because what am I going to learn? Fucking two words in one day? But if you are, Babbel is the way to do it, because with very short conversational-based teaching and lessons, bite-sized lessons, you do pick it up kind of quick.

Babbel makes it fun. Babbel makes learning a new language fun. Yeah, I'm not going to do that on the road. I'm going to do that all the time, because I have the Babbel app on my phone. Yeah, it's the most fun when you have the Babbel app. See. Make it a game.

And now, there's probably a deal for our listeners. Yeah. Yes, if you use code word. If you use the code, probably bonfire. I would think it's bonfire. Or 103. Or it might be bonfire with a number next to it, which would be indicative of the percentage you will save.

None of that is true. OK. Well, Babel hates us. You know what? Learning new languages for dicks and dildos. Fuck them. Here's one. Jacob, you're next.

You don't need an app for? OK, great. Bobby? Yes. Blogging. Building a blog is a create creativity and whatever direction you want to go now we're on something I know we're on something I think maybe you should start blogging your whole day I've blogged

dude I was the original blogger no I invented every move I invented you know this I invented social media I invented fucking web casting, I invented social media. I invented fucking podcasting, websites. I invented it all. Stand-up comedy. Yes, well not stand-up comedy. Bobby, did you have a live journal? I had, yeah, it was called a guest book. Do you remember the guest books back in the day?

It was on the internet before websites. They had this thing called the guest book where people could go and leave you notes and you could leave them notes back. So I would write little journals of things and then people would comment on them. But then comics got a hold of it and they started commenting as other people.

Billy Burr, Jim Norton, Keith Robinson, and they just started. So underneath my little thing would be fans going hey man big fan That was awesome, and then Bob Kelly's is about as fun as child rape except half the laughs Signed sign mr.. Aids That was Jim Norton by the way yeah, did Jim answer you get a price on this trans piss Give more number. Let me just call him. I can do it over this thing.

He can call. Yeah, Bennington's off the air right now. Well, too late. Too late. He won't answer, though. He only answers the text messages. He never answers the phone. Never will he answer the phone.

Blogging has transitioned to video blogging, and Bobby's an influencer. So he is blogging. Yeah, but if I video blog, you know, I'd be on skanks every week You know, he wants this thing that's away from the camera. He said smoking the weed. I have a few good ones Okay Try we'd see what happens. Oh my god

She's out of her tree what's wrong with you you dirty witch. I mean you were so young the irony you were crazy young Okay voice in my head You are crazy. You could probably do okay with it now. Are you? Don't don't do it. You don't want me but Would it be ironic right now if Norton can answer because he was getting pissed on by a trans woman Sorry, I'm busy It's hard to find that porn. What?

Trans women golden shower, trans women peeing on men. And here's the thing, Bobby. If you get into something that crazy, it's even hard to find in pornography, trans woman pissing on you. Yep. It probably would be hard to facilitate happening. But the hunt will keep you occupied.

Yeah, but I'm going to have to get into certain bags and tape. I'm not going to clean up. I'm going to have to get some type of... Just lay in the shower. Yeah, you could just get on your knees in the shower like a dirty little bitch and let this trans person piss all over your face. All fours.

But you don't. Because you're a... listen. You know I like that. Bobby, listen. You're a dirty little piss boy. I don't want because you're, listen. You know I like that. Bobby, listen, you're a dirty little piss boy. Hey. I don't want to be pissed on. I don't like the smell of pee.

I hate. You don't like it now. I'll tell you this. I didn't like olives when I was younger. Ha, I love olives now. Now I love olives. I love olives. I don't, I wouldn't mind it, you see,

I wouldn't let a girl piss on me because the sound of a girl pissing is so disgusting to me. But a guy piss, it is a very it's a better sound. It sounds like a fountain. A guy sounds like a fountain. That's a woman. Listen to that. That sounds like somebody. Yeah. Yeah. A guy can aim it right in the back of your throat,

like a carnival clown with a balloon on his head. Yeah. Girls sound like a rain shower. Well, fans out. We've talked to it at that. Woman, you Yeah, girls sound like a rain shower. Well, it fans out. We've talked about it at that. Woman, you're trying to sound like a gutter. Yeah, your lips got to get involved. Yeah. It's like if you had to piss through an envelope.

Ugh, what else you got? I don't know, you already do this one, but you might want to expand on painting. Well, you draw, but painting. Bring an easel on the road. I just found some of my watercolors I used to do at Montreal. Bring your watercolors on the road.

I do. And then Bobby, honestly, because I do, I love art. And then bring us back your paintings every week and show us what you've created. Well, I would do that with love Here's the problem is that I found out that you're a better artist than me. No, I'm not you are No, and that ball can I say that it bothers me?

Well, I'm not though because I didn't I thought you were just you with art I thought you're just a comic guy a podhead dude a Broadcaster I thought you were just kind of really good at a like stand up and funny I didn't know you had this art side of were just kind of really good at like stand up and funny. I didn't know you had this art side of you that you're really talented at. No. Yeah, and if I were to bring it on now,

I'd feel like Christine. Stop it, Bobby. No, I will not. You're fucking, when we did the sketches, dude, you were really good, and it, but I thought it was gonna blow. This is a simple little charcoal sketch of a trans girl. I mean, it's not that, no big deal.

But it was really good and it bugged me. It bugged me because I thought mine, when I revealed mine, I thought people were going to be like, oh my God, Bobby can draw. I was. But when you revealed yours, people were like, wow, like you kind of stepped on my toes. I really captured that trans woman though. You really did. It'd be funny if you could only draw dicks good. I do draw dicks pretty weirdly good.

Every time we do etchings, he kills it. He does kill it. I thought it was gonna be a one-time thing, he got lucky, nope, every time. He's got... Yours were great. Mine were good, but not as good. Let's be honest, look at me.

Yeah. Jay, Jacob. If I had to rank, I would say Jay's was better. What the fuck did you have to be honest for? But I loved yours. Okay. But that was weird to lead with the insult. Because I knew what he was gonna ask. Bobby, no, no, no, Bobby, Bobby, no, no, no, no, no. Vulnerable. I can't do stick figures. Yours was worse. It's a tough on fucking... Can I say this?

Jesus Christ, Jacob. He's looking for a vice. You can be inspired by Eddie Van Halen. What? Christ, Jacob. He's looking for a vice. You can be inspired by Eddie Van Halen. What? You can be inspired by Eddie Van Halen to play the guitar, or you can burn your car. So you're saying I could be a guy that works at Sam Ash

and fucking be a douchebag that I'll never get there, or Eddie Van Halen? Yeah. I'll pass. Bobby, why don't you start lugging a guitar on the road and pick up the guitar slowly, but surely, but never really that good at it? I used to bring-

Music was one of them. I used to bring a drum pad. Sure. But the whole thing. Like the stand? The stand with all the drum things on it, the practice pad, but it was a whole passage. I brought that to Montreal.

I only know the one Remo pad is what I was thinking. I was in Montreal and I was playing, I was practicing, and then somebody knocked on my door and it was this big bald guy. He goes, yo, I got kids downstairs trying to sleep. Can you knock it off? And I was like, okay. I just folded up my little kit and didn't play

and ruined a dream. A man yelled at me. He knows he's a big man. Music's not gonna work. Music's not gonna work. Music's not gonna work. We're drummers, dude. You understand. It's a room full of drummers. I don't know what they mean, but well, I can read it.

Hang on. Oh, this was actually, this was me in Vegas a couple weeks ago. This is me live at the Circa. Excuse me. Excuse me. Hang on. Hang on a second. Hang on. Let me stop playing for a second. Let me just get... Okay. Yes? Excuse me Excuse me. Hang on. Hang on a second. Hang on. Let me stop playing for a second. Let me just get it. Okay Yes, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I got kids sleeping downstairs. You're fucking cocksuck. Oh knock it off Can you say that with more rhythm so I could play these drums to it? I got kids They're multiplying and I'm losing control

Fuck them kids Fuck them kids. Fuck them kids. All right, so music's out. Music's out. This is weird. How about follow a sports team? How about birds, local animals? Well, there, shall I just read a few in a row? Sure. The next one, let me read the paragraph here because education, Bobby, constantly learning something is one of the healthiest activities you can do for mental acuity, self-confidence, and prevention of dementia. But let me blow through a few. You can go interview random people.

You know, I did have a show I shot, one of it's on the internet, with Dan Soda, by the way. The great Dan Soda, where I would rent a U-Haul truck in the town I went to, and then I would pick up props on the street, just kind of whatever, on the garbage or thrift stores or whatever, and then I would go and pull up to a Starbucks or a Dunkin' Donuts,

and I would do interviews with just normal people. And I would bring them on the back of the truck and we'd do an interview and I'd film it. And then I went and I did a band. I went to their house where they lived, the Front Bottom Boys, and I interviewed them in the U-Haul truck and then they performed in the back of it.

Then I went to a Dunkin' Donuts and met Dan Soda, interviewed him and then I got a crowd and he did stand up in front of the U-Haul truck for five minutes. What happened to it? What do you think? No one enjoyed that? They had to pack up my truck and go home.

You were trying to catch like a carpool carry or something at a time of it, whatever it was, you were trying to catch like a webisode. Webisodes, yeah, they were still called webisodes. It wasn't even a webisode, it was before, and I told you dude, I invented this shit. You invented it. I'm telling you, Dan Soda did five minutes

in a Dunkin' Donuts parking lot in the back of a U-Haul truck. Fucking idiot asshole. I don't know, I think he killed. Oh, I mean fucking brilliant genius. What, what else? I like this one because you're on the road to your different locations, as this one because you're on the road to your different locations as this applies

to you specifically. Bobby, plant appreciation. What? Plant appreciation. Whether you're gardening at home or strolling through a plant store in a foreign country, ducking under an enormous leaf on the trail or stopping to smell the flowers in a field overflowing with them, plants are peaceful.

Why don't I just go to a fucking cruising spot and suck an old guy's cock? Might as well. I'll tell you this too, have you thought about a, how about this? I know, cause again, this list is not giving you the rush. I want to hear more of it, but it's not the rush stuff. How about this? Mid-level local crimes in the city you go to, you do them, you commit small crimes, and then leave town.

Like what type of crime? Like go to a gas station nearby, and like anything from just put a couple things in your pocket and walk out, to flat out armed robbery. But I need the juice, what am I gonna, the juice, what am I? Armed robbery.

Okay, armed robbery, or unarmed? Armed, no, no, armed robbery. What am I getting the juice with armed robbery? Okay arm robbery or unarmed armed no No, that's be a real gun you can use a fake gun my afraid of guns I mean my finger in a hoodie pocket no no no get like a little BB gun So you'll do as much time if you get caught with it. Yeah, but I'm going to Texas. I'll get shot no No, no, no you got to pick pick your poison right you want adventure excitement You have a genuine excitement. I got way to do it. I think this is the best one on his local crime on that list That's not oh Geocaching I've done it. What is that? I've done it

Is an outdoor adventure that you can do anywhere anytime anytime. Search for caches hidden all over the world. Take something, leave something, sign the log. So you, I've done it. I've done it. Is that like Pokemon Go? Similar, but does that, it's actually, so. Scavenger hunt in the city? Scavenger hunt.

Yeah, so basically you have this app and then you have to, they have all over New York, anywhere you go, you turn the app on, and there's a geocache somewhere. And then you have to go find it. And sometimes there's puzzles, like you have to figure out where it is, and figure out how to get out.

Christine would rather I got peed on by a tranny than a toilet. Also, I just pulled the drawings, and Bobby, it does look like you have a bit of a fantasy of trans peeing from your drawing. Look at that. That trans is peeing in your mouth. I'm about to.

I have a fantasy of trans sucking. No, that's peeing. There's no pee there. That's not pee. What did she put her leg on? I mean, that bird's too little, too. I mean, not to throw stones here, but Emma Rose's bird's not Pete. What did you put your leg on? I mean, that bird's too little, too. I mean, not to throw stones here, but Emma Rose's bird's pretty little.

I thought it was perfect. I don't know what you're talking about. No, I mean, if you're gonna feel it, feel it. You know what I mean? I don't wanna feel it. Yo, if this chick's gonna fuck me, I wanna feel it. I mean, look at Jay's with the wings. It's subtle. He has subtlety.

I think both your drawings are really good. This is great. Yeah, Burt looks like he's fucking retarded. Burt did an abstract. That's like an elephant got a pen. What did Burt mean? Like the ring girl coming out of the well. Yeah, but Burt was shit faced when he came in,

so you gotta cut him a little slack. That's fair. Yeah. That's fair. I, geocaching was fun, Jacob. I gotta admit that. Geocaching. Yeah.

I did have a good time. So you can do that new in every city. And when you open up the thing, I gotta admit that geocaching. Yeah, I did have a good And when you open up the thing it's just a little note and you sign your name to it and roll it back up And you put it back. Oh Yeah, what there it is right there Largest treasure hunt. Yeah geocaching. So, okay. Let's not make it that that's not gonna be your vice So, okay, let's not make it that. That's not gonna be your vice. It didn't fulfill it. No.

No. You're trying to fill a hole here that food, pussy, and drugs once filled. Yeah. That's Bobby. I'm Jay. And to get our full show, sign up for a SiriusXM subscription at SiriusXM.com slash bonfire. Support our show. Don't be some jerk off just taking the free stuff. Let them know you want us to be here forever. or we won't. Or maybe we won't. Subscribe. Because I'm not. The ones I have on the list are all peaceful ones.

What is that? Video games. I can't. I mean, if I brought it, I could get, listen, I just recently started playing Call of Duty again. Yeah. On Max's, uh, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't, like I could. Video games. I can't, I mean if I brought, I could get, listen, I just recently started playing Call of Duty again. Yeah. On Max's Sony. And I mean when I get into it, you understand, I used to play that game from nine at night

till six in the morning. I was. It's not easy to play on the road though. It's not easy to play on the road. Online games? No, it's not easy to play on the road, the internet is as good, and I got really into it for a long time, and it affected my relationship.

Really? Yeah, because Dawn would be like, all right, I'm going to bed, and I'd be like, all right, see ya, and she'd wake up, and I was still playing, yelling at people. Maybe like a Grand Theft Auto or something, where it's just a story that you play, and then you put it down when you're done.

I didn't like story mode. I like multiplayer. I like going at another guy. I like going through the... I like being alone and playing a story. I like going through the night because you go from America and then the people in other countries start, and then all of a sudden you're playing Germans, and then you're playing Australian, you know what I mean?

It's like the voices change, the accent changes, and then you... I had a team, my clan, I had a clan called the Gays. G-A-A-Y-S. Gays. Gays. And we pretended they were gay. So when we were going to room, we'd be like, hey, guys. And we'd kill everybody.

And we'd kill everybody, and they got really mad, and they'd start calling us the F-word. Yeah, so that's true. You started the internet. You started homophobia. Yep. You started websites. I started homophobia on gaming. I did.

Gaming homophobia, for sure. How did he get a 12-year-old Nicaraguan boy to hate himself for his sexual identity? I remember Kuma used to play. He started playing, and he stunk. He just used to camp. Oh, yeah? And we used to just go up behind him

and stab him in the asshole. And you hear that laugh. Ha ha ha, you got me. I think he still plays, Kumi plays all that shit. Reddit says that adrenaline is good and to get some risk-seeking behaviors like graffiti. There you go.

You could take up tagging. Yeah, take up tagging, then I get into an MS-13 zone. I fucking, I put a panda face with a thumbs up. That should be, you want the juice? Start spray painting over gang tags. That all says lockpicking and rock climbing. Or maybe every major city you go to, you go and you take a video of you taking a shit

on like a Banksy or something. I don't mind lockpicking. Lockpicking is awesome. Lockpicking. Maybe lockpicking, going in the rooms. Maybe I lockpick. Or how about voyeurism? How about you get a lot of spy camera stuff

and put them in local, like the room next to you's toilets and things like that. You go in with the housekeeping and plant little cameras, and then you watch people live their lives Truman Show style. That might be all right. Maybe I'll do that. Maybe I'll just drill holes in walls. Yeah.

There's nothing wrong with that. And then, yeah, maybe, like, you be the eyes of a picture in the other room. Well, if I get one of those rooms with the door that goes to the other room, it's like two doors facing each other. I just stand in front of that door naked and just make noises and see if they open the door.

They open the door, and then you tell them, and then you tell them that you were trapped between the doors. Oh, thank God. Oh, thank you so much. Oh, thank Lord. I got trapped in here. That's a pretty good one.

What about chess? Chess is on the list. You can do it on your phone, computer. No, I did chess for a while. It just doesn't... It doesn't feel... You're trying to replace coming, eating, and- Yeah, with fucking a boring game

that I'm gonna get swiped by a 12 year old fucking- With chess. Ukrainian. There's nothing- Have you thought about masturbating while you're playing chess though? Those people are so unsuspecting. No, that might be something.

There's nothing on here. Everything for- Kasparov, I'm getting ready to pop. Hobbies for an addict all want you to do peaceful minded things. Like what? Like yoga. It's hot in here.

Yoga. It's not hot. It doesn't suggest anything with tranny push? Here we go. What? It's fucking hot, Jacob. OK. It's hot.

Did you put the heat up? No. Jacob's in a t-shirt. It's obviously hot, Jacob. OK. It's hot. You did you put the heat up? Jacob's in a T-shirt. It's obviously hot. Oh, my God. It's hot. Yeah, you're not wearing seven layers. It's hot. Jacob's comfortable. It's too hot. Yeah, hot. Why? What happened? It's hot. She just did her job.

You said that so. She just did her thing. I didn't even pin it. It's hot. Christine, you got to make it warmer in here. It's fucking freezing in here. It's hot. Bobby, so hot. It's hot Christine. You gotta make it warmer in here. It's fucking freezing in here. It's hot Bobby so hot it's hot. I'm getting hot from what what's getting you hot you think the tranny pistol? Seeing that drawing of that girl's wiener, but Yeah, maybe I should just start video blogging like live

Live don't do that. Why? No, no, no, it's gotta be something else. What's charming I start going. What's up guys? I really think the best thing for you is to to do some gun stuff to go hunting Maybe I'll go maybe I'll start going to gun places and shooting guns who wouldn't shooting wild hogs is legal because they're all and shooting guns. Who wouldn't, shooting wild hogs is legal because they're all invasive. I bet if you get street walking prostitutes and then bring them back to the room

and just beat the shit out of them, never pay them. What if I get street walking? What are you doing your last night? It's like something to look forward to each night. What if I get them and try to convert them and help them? Okay, I like that, yeah, like hooker outreach, but then you just leave town. You build them up so full of self-worth

and then you go a Sunday morning I want you to meet me at this place for brunch and we're gonna start talking about the game plan and then never go You're you're out of town right on already. What about that fake name? Fig everything you flash some cash you re-rob them back when you leave right and you just leave them sleeping in a room That they're good if I get them know what if I get them to do it all and I transform them and I make them want to live a better life and then the last night when they come to the room, I'm naked and I offer them $1,000.

Oh. And then I break them and then I go, you failed. You don't even say that, you say, you owe me for the lessons. I make them pay me. Yeah, they have to have sex with you to pay you. He goes, now you're right back to being a whore again. It's a full circle weekend.

What if I start a cult? I could do a cult? I wouldn't mind that. Probably could start a cult. Yeah. You got a good personality to start a cult. Hey, how you guys doing? You all right?

Everybody all right? I think so. You good? I think you have the personality to win some people over. I start a new religion. Yeah. That sounds good. Rajeebabi?

Oh, do you bob you in a robe at all times? Some loose garb? But it always leads to sex, so Don would have a problem with that. Yeah, eventually you're going to want to fuck the other guy's wives and the thing and tell them it's too much. You're dancing a dangerous dance. I'm telling you, it seems the only thing that's gonna make sense here is if trans women pee on you Well, I can't sometimes the simplest idea is the easiest Can you Google how much it costs to get pee on you don't have to pay them?

What are they gonna do tell on you? Yeah? It's got to be three and if you get beat up by Tranny after they peed on you then they kick the shit out of you That's so hilarious. That's it, now it's a great Monday. Our Monday show goes like that, though. Guys, got my ass rolled by another tranny. Come over with a black eye, I smell like piss. You can't do this regularly, but I have one exciting thing because you are going to Texas.

Would you shoot hogs from a helicopter? Yeah. I know a friend who runs a helicopter hunter. Nice. I would do that. You want me to set it up for you? Yeah, I'll do that. You'll love it.

I'll do that. Now instead of actually going though, because you got the receipt now, you tell me lying when you tell Dawn, it goes, I'm going hog hunting, and then as long as you fuck a fat woman that night, you're not lying. Right.

So, think about that. And then you have the receipt, again though, Jacob hooked the whole thing up. Jacob though, you gotta be willing to lie to Dawn with a straight face, and look her in the eyes, and know that you're betraying a woman. Jacob, did Bobby go hog hunting or did he fuck a hog? He went hog hunting.

Wow, he's a liar. He's a piece of shit. He's through and through. Yeah. You're good. And you set him up. I set it up. I know he was hog hunting.

I was hog, he was hog hunting? He wasn't with a fat chick in the hotel room? No. I put him in touch with the hog hunter. Jacob, would you go overboard too? Would you go like, Don, this is crazy. He loves you. He doesn't need anything more than this, okay?

The guy just likes to shoot pigs from a helicopter. Just calm down. Don't make this a scene at home. I mean, while Bobby's just getting his face squished by a hairy-thighed pig. Don, you know when we're outside, I know he jokes on the air, but when I'm sitting with Bobby outside,

he says how much he loves you. He does? Yeah. That's a good friend right there. That's nice. What does he say? He just says how comfortable he is. He couldn't do it without you.

Do what? As much as you drive him crazy, he loves coming home to you. Oh, I drive him crazy. He loves coming home to you. Do what? As much as you drive him crazy, he loves coming home to you. Oh, I drive him crazy. He loves coming home to you. You ever get yelled at by that fucking man? Jacob, that was your first fucking, you hit a maze wall in that one right there.

Even though, look, even though you get on his nerves, he misses you younger. I can cut that part out. Look, and listen, you lack the one thing he's looking for in this world, life and youth. But he does like coming home because he says you make a great chicken cutlet. And isn't that what's important?

She makes a great chicken cutlet and a Hunter's Stew. What's Hunter's Stew? Hunter's Stew. It's chicken catch-a-tory. You ever have chicken catch-a-tory? I'm sure. It's chicken, onions, mushrooms, peppers, sauce, grilled up.

What's the sauce? The sauce, a red sauce. Cacciatore? Cacciatore, oh dude, chicken cacciatore is my favorite. Really? Mushrooms, I make her call the mushroom police before she makes it, just to make sure they allow her to have too much mushrooms,

because Don sometimes doesn't put enough mushrooms in it. So I, you know, apparently there's a police that says you can't do that many mushrooms, but I make her call the mushroom police. Look at that, dude, how good is that? Over a pasta? Mm-hmm. Chicken breast?

Chicken thigh. But she does chicken breast too, because she's like you. Yeah. Yeah, she likes it, she doesn't like the fatty, but the chicken thigh is the authentic way. You need the black meat to make it taste good.

You need the dark meat. Thank you. Black me up, Lou. You just got blacked up so big. You need the dark meat to make it taste good. But she puts the chicken breasts, because she's a sissy like you. So maybe this could be your weekend vice, could be recipe searching for Dawn.

Maybe I do that. Maybe look for new ideas you'd like her to try. I gotta find something dude because I'm envious of people that go on the road and get to party and drink and smoke and hang out and eat whatever the fuck they want. How about we hours of the night vigilanteism? I wouldn't mind that. Taking back the streets? I wouldn't mind that.

Just testing my skills. Just go out there and take back the... Try to stop crimes. Maybe you lose, maybe you win, but you're a hero either way. Yeah, I'll go out, put a black hoodie on, look like Mike Vecchione on a Tuesday night. But you don't... you take no credit for it.

Thanks, Luke. And even Dawn will be like a Tuesday night. But you don't, you take no credit for it. Thanks, Luke. And even Dawn will be like, Bobby, where are you for these hours? Like Dawn, just know I'm doing good, okay? I can't talk about it, but I'm doing good. Yeah. I like that, maybe I'll do that.

Late night vigilanteism. Late night, I get a pair of nunchucks. I gotta get you a costume. I gotta get some nunchucks. What would your costume be though? I would be a black hoodie. Black hoodie, it may be one of those face things that go over your face.

It's too much Trayvon Martin vibes, you know what I mean? What about a red hoodie? Something Boston. Now, now we're thinking. Green hoodie, green hoodie with Celtics. Oh, I like that, I don't mind that at all. The Boston Celtic.

Yeah, the Celtic. The Lucky Vigilante, right? Yes, Lucky the Vigilante? Lucky the Vigilante, I show up with. vigilante lucky the vigilante I show up with you should be unlucky no you're unlucky if you see me yeah yes I don't mind this at all I have a big shamrock a 33 on the back and this is gonna be a little annoying especially in a high-speed chase but you should constantly dragging a pot of gold I but I hit them with a shillelagh. That's my weapon, a shillelagh.

A shillelagh. Yeah, and I do it in an Irish accent. You've been doing a little bad work there, my friend. You don't want to bust that woman up in an alley, because you'll have to face me. The Vigileprecon. Hello there, what are you doing? You're smoking a little crack cocaine, are ya? Oh, well, I don't think so. I think it's time to go.

And when I say go, I mean to heaven, I say Jesus Christ. I don't think you belong in that house, sir. Uh, you're a squatter. Well, I'm gonna be squatting my chilele on your face now. My chilele. Have you been up, little kid? Hey, you took some juicy fruit from the CVS. I like late night vigilante Bobby. I like it too.

That's probably the move. That'll give you the juice. Well, it does kind of go back to the list. High risk events. High risk. Don't listen. Don't jump into like a gang warfare or something like that. But you see a guy peeking in the cars, you know what I mean?

You go around, you slap him around a little bit. He's gonna run because you're gonna be wearing a full costume. I'm gonna be wearing all green. All green. And Trump, those Trump sneakers. Brand new Trump sneakers. Brand new Trump sneakers. Air Trumps.

What are you doing peeking in a car that's not yours? You're not rich enough to own a Bentley. I'm here to make America great again. You have gadgets, it's perfect. I do have gadgets. You have a lot of gadgets. So many gadgets, so many water. Ooh, I can buy more gadgets.

Oh, your handcuffs would be just two of those water holders you have? I get, no, but. With the water bottle holders? I get those. You need a utility belt. I get a utility belt, I'll have a belt buckle that's a knife, just in case I get tied up.

You gotta spray paint it. Do your whole montage of making your utility belt. Your finger just disturbed me the way you waved back like that. It was all fucking spray painting. It was all fucking like a bod crane about it. It was so, so slow and weird. What the fuck are you on, heroin? That's proper technique. Oh, spray painting.

Okay. I'd like to make your costume. I'd like to be involved in making that. I wish I knew how to mend clothing. Maybe you learn. Maybe you're my sidekick. Oh, so on the weekends, my job, my new vice, Yeah.

is gonna be mending costumes for us to wear on the streets. I have to call you up and go, listen Jay, I got my uniform rused this weekend, fighting a bunch of kids at a playground. Bring it back to HQ, I'll mend them right up. Every crime I try to stop, I get the shit kicked out of me. And rips in your uniform that I have to fix. I just show up everywhere with a hole in me, stitches.

Jay Okerson is the mender. The seamstress. The Seamster. My thing, I gotta have a catchphrase though. I need a catchphrase. How about you just fuck with the wrong bull? That was the catchphrase from the American History X guy. No, I need an Irish one like,

I'm gonna show you a thing or two of a thing or two. Oh, I don't, yeah, I like that over there. I'm gonna show you a thing or two of a thing or two. No, I think we should keep the lucky thing in it. It's like you just found yourself unlucky. Your luck just ran out my friend. There it is. Your luck just ran out. Yeah I show up. But they gotta hear something before I call. No man I don't know if I want to break into this bar after hours man. They say he's out there. Then all of a sudden my music kicks in. I play it on my iPhone.

There you go. Your locks just ran out. He goes oh man where is he? They hear the music first. Oh yeah. What the? Who the? Why is there bagpipes in this part of New Bedford Massachusetts?

Hey laddie it's me and your locks just right out. Oh, I love that. And I hit him right in the face with my shillelagh. And then they stomp me, because there's too many of them. And they stomp you out. And I got to plant the fasciitis in a bad hamstring. Yeah, you deck one.

It didn't hurt him that much. And then they go on to beat the ever-loving shit out of you. Yeah. Ow! But every time I get up, I go, now you've learned your lesson. Yeah. Yeah.

You probably won't do it as often. If you know, it'll always be this annoying. Yeah. Look how tired you are breathing in and heavy. I may be beat up, but you're exhausted. Now you won't be able to do crime. You're going to have to go home and take a nap. Just know if you guys kill me, it's more charges.

Just know if you guys kill me, it's more charges. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha It's just girls fighting videos and it says in various states of dress Which is pretty fun, but this is nothing about nudity this is to I think it's high school girls fighting and the girl gets get is full mount on her and arms pinned and The thing the thing says like the the write-up on it says something like whatever you win This girl is so pinned her face is so numb from a facial beating, this isn't it. Her face is so numb from this beating that she just starts taking punches to the face

and she goes, all right, I don't care, it's over, you win, and the girl would just be like, bam, bam, and more, and she goes, okay, you win. Like, it's just, her face is so beat up. Now it's great. I can't watch fights. What? Because I got beat up so much as a kid was too many fights as a young boy

Are we wrong like that fights as young boys? I got beat up too much. I hate it I hate I I can I makes me read it gives me like that fucking Vietnam shit. Was it? This I feel like this makes me I think watching these makes me less likely because they show all the, that's where, you know, right at it was where that thing popped out, remember that girl, did she kill the other girl, did she die? She went to the hospital. Yeah, she was like fighting for her life,

is there an update on that at all? She must have lived because it would have been big news. I only fuck girls too, so it really brings me back. That is weird. Okay, now we have a thing, your new vice fighting women. To the nude, whoever's nude first, you or them, and then they leave. You get a free boner, or you get to whoop up on a woman.

Girl fights, man, guys have code. Women don't have, they'll just, like if a guy hits a guy and knocks him out, it's like he'll walk away, it's done. Women just keep going. It's hair pulling, like that shit. Yeah, like all their childhood comes out, all the shit from their dad, and they never stop.

It's like, fuck, and they're always sneaky. There's always another girl that will jump in, and then the other girl will kick the other chick in the head while she's dancing. It's no honor. And they always pull hair. Always. There it is.

You win whatever. Oh. This is crazy. This girl takes such a facial beating beating we'll put this out on our Why can't they fight in the summer too? That's like the fall. It's like a shitty time to have a fight. Oh Oh, all right. Oh god. Oh god. Oh no this see oh, that's over. It should be over. Oh It's over wait she pins her own But I'm telling you these punches must

Can't watch this these punches money like fucking feathers. I can't you know what fuck her. She just threw a punch back from the ground Look out Look, she never stopped. She's like she's like kiss my ass. Don't even care. She's oh Here's your legs lady. I'm not scared. Just keep going then. Just end it. Why are you just slapping me? She just takes them.

Yeah because she's emotionally dead. She's not feeling this. Look she goes, Yeah I guess she wins. Just go until she quits. Oh god. These fucking people are fucking lunatics. They are. Oh God, I hate this. Get off, I'm over this, whatever.

You know what? Punch her again. I'm over this. You know what? Yeah, punch her again. Oh, whatever. That reminds me of fighting with Don. Yeah, whatever. Yo! You win. Fine, whatever. Dad, do I have your love yet? Whatever.

Whatever, Rocky. Whatever. You won. Okay, fine. Whatever. I guess I'm pinned to the ground and you're beating my face on mercifully. Wow, that was annoying. I know.

She didn't give a shit. What? I've got you set up for pork choppers. Really? Did you do it? Yeah. Well, I got a text back saying, look out, fat chicks of San Antonio.

Bobby's in the game. It's the greatest name, pork choppers. I like it. You're going to shoot pigs from out a window. A helicopter. It's a dream of mine, actually. And then you just leave them dead on the ground. There's no use whatsoever.

I'll tell you what I really want to do, there's these guys that go out at night and they put feet out and then they all have rifles with night vision. They all have night vision on. We watch the same videos. They all wait until and then they're on radios and they go now. And they just murder every, even the little ones are trying to make it away, you have funk. Ah, I love that. Late night pig murder. You're shooting with an AR from an open door

of a helicopter, you're gonna love it. There's video if you wanna see it. I've seen them. It's one of my dreams to go hog hunting. I mean, because they're just, they have ARs, right? Yeah, it's like the Full Metal Jacket scene, but but it's big so it's legal. Yeah, that's legal So everything's gonna be cool dawn. She's going hog hunting Hey dawn, you know what I did this weekend. I hunted hogs

And you could be sure I used every part of that animal Hey, I gotta go take a shower cuz I have a little hog on me Yeah, fuck you pigs yeah Yeah, well kill the parent first so the babies get to see yeah, what do you mean? Look at the babies their hogs are invasive invasive species this summer cats. They'll kill them to hunt them What are we arguing here? Yeah? I know Jacob Jacob cat hunting from a helicopter Jake wants to go Harlem cat hunting. Yeah Jacob wants to throw a fishbone out the window

Yeah, I like when you I like killing things from the air where you're in zero danger Exactly, you know these guys that hunt the hogs on the ground these hogs There's a funniest videos ever when the hogs they miss him and the hogs attack them And you hear these rednecks just scream It's so this guy right here look at this thing that thing look at this thing son of a bitch won't die Look at the size of that dude this thing he shoots it and it it gets them They'll murder you too those teeth are like razor blades They just sharpen themselves like knives every time they open it. I look at this thing. Oh

And this is a Hog hunting a man. Yeah, well sometimes they don't get them and these things attack them those dogs Get it look at the size of that thing. That's from Russia And it's a feral pig. Is that what you're gonna kill? Look at... Dude, that thing's a monster. Is that what you kill? He sure is.

Oh, I'll kill that. That, like a wild boar? Look at that thing. Yeah. Yeah, it's a wild boar, dude. Oh, boom! Do it again. Get it again. Here he comes. That's good bacon.

Oh, you just pissed him off with that one. Yeah, you gotta be careful. Oh, this is a future one. This one's made of liquid metal. Ha ha ha ha ha. Look at that thing. Shot it and it's still going. Oh, right in the... Oh, you shot it right on top of its hair.

I read something about it. Here it comes. Here it comes. Watch what it does. Goes right at him. I really hope. I'm rooting for the pig in this one. Oh, why? Huh?

No way. I just don't like this guy's whole thing Yeah, I'm not against killing animals. I just don't think this guy's thing It's more sport than Hamburg meat just put them in a thing slice their throat hang them upside down At least think this thing has a chance to kill you back. No, not really. Oh, 100%. Look at this thing, dude. It got up. Look at that thing. Right. And then they shot it a bunch more times. And it's still coming at him, dude.

Alright, you just found your new fucking jolt of adrenaline, dude. Oh, I'm in. Hog hunting. I'm gonna bring back pork chops and applesauce on Monday.