the bossbabe podcast - 201. Tony Robbins Helps You Define Success

Episode Date: January 18, 2022

Are you hesitant to set goals for 2022 in case *yet another thing* interrupts your plans and throws you back to square one? That mindset stops today.  Yes. The past two years have left us all feeling uncertain + anxious, but if there is anyone who can save 2022 from the same fate, it’s this week’s guest – Tony Robbins. Prepare for some serious mindset mic drops as he unpacks powerful tools to redirect your emotional compass for the year ahead.  The world is changing, but you don’t have to sit on the sidelines watching it pass you by. If you’ve got goals sitting on the back-burner, NOW is time to execute them. If you’re ready to step into your fearless, future self, THIS episode is the aha-moment you’ve been waiting for. Listen now! Highlights: Tony Robbins’s unexpected perspective on success + fulfillment  Three questions you need to ask yourself to start the year right  How to get out of survival mode and take your power back  A sneak peek into Tony Robbins’s upcoming Breakthrough 2022 Challenge  Links: Your Ultimate Roadmap To Making Six Figures In 2022 FREE Create Your Future Workbook Breakthrough2022.com: January 25th-29th, 2:00 PM. ET Episode 164: Life With Meaning + Purpose  tonyrobbins.com/priming Just Thrive Use code “BOSSBABE” for 15% off sitewide  Follow: BossBabe: @bossbabe.inc Natalie Ellis: @iamnatalie Danielle Canty: @daniellecanty Tony Robbins: @tonyrobbins

Your mental emotional state is the single most important ingredient to not only success but fulfillment. And most of us do not know how to manage it. What I really like people to understand is that the quality of your life is the quality of your emotions. A boss babe is unapologetically ambitious and paves the way for herself and other women to rise, keep going, and fighting on. She is on a mission to be her best self in all areas. It's just believing in yourself. Confidently stepping outside her comfort zone to create her own vision of success. Welcome to the Boss Babe podcast, the place where we share with you the real behind the

scenes of building successful businesses, achieving peak performance and learning how to balance it all. I'm Danielle Canty, the co-founder and president of Boss Babe and your host for this week's episode. Now, I have to tell you, I was both excited and nervous about this episode. The guest that we had on today, his presence commands your attention. Like when he is speaking, you listen up, you take notes and you learn everything you can because today's guest was Tony Robbins and let

me tell you he did not disappoint I've had the honor actually of meeting Tony a couple of times and his virtual presence is incredible but his in-person like one his stature he's very tall but second of all like he is just so wise and full of different perspectives that I've not heard before. So I really took upon this opportunity to ask him questions that I know you guys want to know as well. Like we're in the season of planning, it's January, we're coming back with a renewed sense of energy, but sometimes we lose ourselves in those goals. Sometimes we lose ourselves on, you know, what does success look like? What do we really want to create out of our lives? And if you're like me and you've been asking yourself that question recently, and it's not necessarily

like a very clear answer, this is going to be an amazing episode for you because I did a deep dive with Tony and like, what is success? How do we define it? And how do we go on and create it for ourselves? So I really encourage you to listen to this once, maybe listen to it twice, three times, because every time you listen, this is what I find anyway, every time I listen to Tony, I hear more and more details that maybe I looked over the first time, because when you are challenging new ways of thinking about things and new attitudes, sometimes it takes a couple of times to like really sink in. So listen to this once and then it's a shortish episode. So listen to it again and really think about how you can apply some of the things we spoke about and answer some of the questions for yourself. You'll hear in this, he coaches me on some things.

So, you know, allow yourself to go through those questions too and answer them honestly. And maybe there are things that you can change also. So without further ado, we are going to dive into this episode and I really, really hope you enjoy it. Well, Tony, thank you so much for coming on the Boss Fade podcast again. I always feel like it's such an honor to spend time with you. And every time I have conversations with you, whether it's in person or when you came on the Boss Babe podcast last time, you just give such wisdom. And so I'm really, really excited to dive into the conversations that we're going to have today.

Great to be with you again. So I want to start off this conversation because we're heading into the new... Well, we're in the new year right now. Everyone's enthusiastic about setting their next goals, what they're going to do with 2022, all these huge plans and really thinking about how they're going to create success, shall we say in quotation marks. But I'm curious, what do you feel like is the definition of success? Well, it's interesting. I think success is getting what you want and fulfillment is living the life you're made to be, you know, giving your gifts, so to speak. And I think if you just go for success, you end up achieving it.

Usually, if you're really dedicated and you don't give up and you keep trying different approaches, anybody who's persistent enough can succeed, get what they want. But oftentimes you get what you want and you're not really fulfilled. And I believe success without fulfillment is the ultimate failure. So I think it's really important to understand not only what you want, but what's really going to make you really fulfilled and happy. Because if you're making everybody else happy and you're unhappy or you succeed and you're still not happy, I mean, that's really terrible. And we've seen that over and over again. You see people who have made huge fortunes and become extremely famous and they take their own lives. And the reason is because,

you know, success is not enough. Anyone can succeed. The real question is, what are you going to do to be fulfilled? I love that. And I know that I always try and put myself in Alice's shoes. I know loads of them are going to be thinking, well, yeah, I understand that. But how do I know? How do I know what makes me feel fulfilled? How do I know what makes me feel happy?

And I'm curious, like, what things that you've done over the years and what actions that you've taught for really people to like start to understand that how they ask themselves those questions well the answer to a question is going to be completely controlled by the mental and emotional state you're in so if you're feeling sad or frustrated covid you don't know what's happening in the future and you're uncertain you go like oh what do i want i don't know because your mental emotional state is the single most important ingredient to not only success, but fulfillment. And most of us do not know how to manage it. And when I say manage it, I'm really talking about your mind and your emotions, right? Those are the two things that if you can master those, because most people are trying to master the outside world and you can't control the outside world. You can influence it. But the one thing you can control is how you use your mind,

what you do with your emotions. And if you think about the quality of your life, again, look at people who supposedly have everything and they're miserable. I get those phone calls from the people that are so quote famous, the great actors, the great musicians, they won the Academy Award. They just won the gold medal and they're literally depressed. And the reason is because they thought getting something would eventually make them feel a certain way. And it does for this long. And then you're off to the next thing. And the reason is because they thought getting something would eventually make them feel a certain way. And it does for this long. And then you're off to the next thing. And then, boy, when you work so hard for something forever like that, it's not there. So what I really like people to understand is that the quality of your life is the quality of your emotions. If you have a billion dollars and every day your habitual emotions are feeling frustrated

and stressed and overwhelmed, your life emotions are feeling frustrated and stressed and overwhelmed, your life is called frustrated, stressed, and overwhelmed. If you have three beautiful children and a great husband or a wife or boyfriend or girlfriend, and every day you worry, your life is not love. Your life is worry. It doesn't matter how you have this beautiful family. So think of it, emotions control the quality of our life. And we have habitual emotions. That's why you'll see people who, you know, they're always angry about something. I'm sure you know somebody like that. Or they're always worried about something.

If they're not worried about somebody they know, they worry about something they don't even know. Right? Or, you know, some people that are, you know, think they're funny and they're not. But they have a good time, you know. Who do you want to hang out with? So learning how to direct your emotions. And emotions create everything. Everything you want in your quote unquote success will be driven by having certain drives of emotion. And, you know, think about it. Emotions create wars. Emotions create peace. Eventually, emotions are what you get you in a relationship. Emotions, how we all got here. You know, somebody had sex and that was driven by emotion. So we are incredibly emotionally unfit today. You know, we're fearful about everything. It's nobody's fault.

It's just culturally, we've been conditioned to get everything instantly by having it in our fingertips, in our phone or our iPad or our computer, whatever the case may be. And so now if you don't get what they want immediately, I'm sure you've seen somebody standing on the street corner and they're banging on their phone like, give it a minute. It's going to a satellite and back, you know? People today have zero patience. And then that messes up the next part that's really your life. Quality of life is quality of your emotions. But your emotions are magnified by the quality of your relationships. If you have terrible relationships, it's going to be hard to stay in a great emotional state. And so what I try to teach people is what do you do to take control of your mind and emotions?

And fundamentally, the most basic thing you've got to do, especially at a time like COVID is you got to every day have a couple of simple practices. One of those is every day you got to feed your mind. And when I say feed your mind, I mean, consciously seek out something that's going to give you new insight, new inspiration, new way of looking at things. Because otherwise, today, the news follows you, right? It's in your pocket. And the news people are good people. But they're doing their job.

What's their job? Make as much profit as possible. How do you get the most profit? Get the most people to watch. How do you get the most people to watch? Fear. If it bleeds, it leads is the phrase they use in journalism, right? And we've seen so much fear built up now that most people have lost their faith.

And you can't lose it, fortunately. It's just a muscle that needs to be regained. But you have to fill your mind. You have to pursue it. Great ideas are not going to interrupt you. They have to be pursued. And the good news is today, if you get away from just the traditional news, you can go to podcasts like Boss Babes.

You can go to different locations. You can get another perspective and you can feed your mind. But if you don't feed your mind, my original teacher was a guy named Jim Rohn. And he used to say, Tony, I got a question for you. He said, what if your worst enemy put sugar in your coffee? What's going to happen to you when you drink that coffee? Is it going to have sweet coffee? He said, you know, what if your family member, your friend, your love by accident drops one drop of strychnine, what's going to happen when you drink that coffee?

Is it going to be dead? And he goes, that's right. Life is sugar and strychnine. So watch your coffee. Like every day, you got to stand guard at the door of your mind, especially at times like this, when there's so much fear. So you feed your mind. And then the second thing you got to do is the mind and the body work together. Meaning fear is physical, but so is courage. Have you ever been so scared that, you know, like you have a hard time swallowing or you feel like in your gut, you know, that kind of fear that's physical, but courage is not that you're not afraid. Courage is you're scared, you know, what was, but you're going to do it anyway, right? That it's a muscle and courage comes from doing something physical. So every day you got to feed your mind and you got to do something physical to push yourself beyond what you're

normally comfortable with. Meaning go for a jog or run or walk really fast or go lift some weights a little more than you're used to. Cause every time you push yourself to go beyond what's comfortable, you get more comfortable with a bigger challenge. And pretty soon what's hard is easy. And it isn't just the weight or the run. It's what happens to your mind and emotions because they work together. And then what you got to do is really, you got to find a great role model and decide what do I want to go after?

And let me have them show me a way. Show me the way, at least the pattern, rather than me learning by trial and error. And now I got to take action. And then ideally, I got to help somebody who's worse off than I am, because that'll give me fuel to remind me that my life is there. You know, you know, I feed, you know, 100 million people every single year now. But because somebody fed my family when I was young, and it wasn't the food. It was that Thanksgiving, somebody showed up with a surprise and it showed that they cared. So I think if you learn to take control of your emotions, then you can take control of your entire life. But without that, it's just a pipe dream. It's

just more new year's resolutions. And within six or eight weeks, you're back to where you were before. I love that. We recently did a podcast on like responsibility and really taking responsibility for emotions. And I think that's something that, like you say, a lot of people are like, well, I'll be happy when I achieve that. I'll be X when I achieve this, or I'll be happy when someone does this for me or treats me this way. And just like in a responsibility of going, actually, no, I need to take responsibility for how I feel and make the changes for within. I think is like you say, that's the only way that you're going to find that

success or that fulfillment if you decide to start moving in that direction. But I think one of the challenges is so many people have been conditioned over the last two years that they're disappointed so many times, they're afraid to get their hopes up. They're afraid to get excited again. Like, you know, I remember last year we thought, okay, we're coming to the end of COVID and people are going to start and go, okay, new Like, you know, I remember last year we thought, okay, we're coming to the end of COVID and people are going to start and go, okay, new year, new life. I'm ready. And then boom, right?

We go back and it's like two weeks to shorten the spread, flatten the curves turned in almost two years. So then what happens is people get to learn helplessness where it hasn't worked for so long. I'm afraid to get my hopes up. So they start thinking the problem is permanent. Like it's never going to change. And it's not permanent or it's pervasive because I can't do this. My

whole life is over because my relationship isn't good. My whole life's over because my finance is good and it's not pervasive. Your life is more than that. But when you get in your head, then you start thinking there's something wrong with you and then there's no place to go. So what you need is to get out and change your body and change your perspective. And you got to take control of, let me offer your audience three decisions because every moment of your life, your audience right now, where they're listening to both of us, Danielle, they're making three decisions. The problem is most people make these three decisions subconsciously, unconsciously. So what really is just running is your habits. The way you thought before is the way you feel and the way you keep behaving. But if you want a new life, you got to make new decisions.

So here are the three real fast. Decision one is, what are you going to focus on? Because if the audience should hear this, where focus goes, energy flows. Most people are focused on what they're afraid of. And so more fear comes their way. And it's easy because we all have a 2 million year old brain that's designed to look for what's wrong to protect. So we protect ourselves to fight it or to run for it or to freeze, right? That's the way our old brain is wired. It's a 2 million year old brain, but that brain is never going to make you happy. You have to learn to take control of your focus.

And if you focus on, oh my God, it's never going to work. Or you listen to somebody who tells you, oh, you know, COVID is going to be here forever and we're never going to have any freedom again. And you focus on that. You can get really depressed as most people have. We've had a hundred thousand people overdose on drugs. We have more depression and more people in a suicidal mode than we've ever seen in the last two years because people need a compelling future. You can deal with a tough today if you got a compelling tomorrow. And so what I help people do is design that. But once you change your focus, you'll change how you feel. Focus and feeling go together. But the minute you decide to focus on something, your brain makes the second decision. What does this mean? Is this the end or the beginning? If you think it's the

end of a relationship, you're going to behave very differently than if you think it's the beginning of a relationship, right? If you think this person is disrespecting you, or is this person challenging you, or is this person coaching you, or is this person actually loving on you? But if you think they're disrespecting you, you're going to feel differently and behave differently. You're going to make a different third decision, which is what am I going to do? So if you're focused on what's wrong and you're constantly in a meaning of, oh my God, this is unfair, this is unjust. Most of life is unfair and unjust. But if you put yourself in that emotional state, you're going to do very little and you're just going to accept things as they are. But you can change all three. So let me give you just an example of a pattern for your audience. And I'll do it with you, Danielle, if it's okay. I think I know how your answers will be anyway, knowing you pretty well. Let's go. I'm getting a session

from Tony Robbins right now. So these are just three examples. So patterns of focus. So do you tend to focus more on what you have or what's missing during COVID? Let's take a quick pause to talk about my new favorite all-in-one platform, Kajabi. You know, I've been singing their praises lately because they have helped our business run so much smoother and with way less complexity, which I love. Not to mention our team couldn't be happier because now everything is in one place, so it makes collecting data, creating pages, collecting payment, all the things so much simpler. One of our mottos at Boss Babe is simplify to amplify and kajabi has really helped us do that this year so of course i needed to share it here with you it's the perfect time of year to do a bit

of spring cleaning in your business you know get rid of the complexity and instead really focus on getting organized and making things as smooth as possible i definitely recommend kajabi to all of my clients and students so if you're listening and haven't checked out Kajabi yet now is the perfect time to do so because they are offering Boss Babe listeners a 30-day free trial go to kajabi.com slash boss babe to claim your 30-day free trial that's kajabi.com slash boss babe so I'll consciously focus on what I'm grateful for and really focus on what I have, but subconsciously I'll go to like what I'm missing for sure. Like I have to watch that pattern. That's right. And you, and I knew you would be that way. Most people who are conscious

catch it. But the problem is during these last two years, that survival brain has been going full tilt. So it tends to make us focus on what's missing. Well, when you focus constantly on what's missing, not even consciously, just subconsciously, how could you, no matter how great your life is, no matter how great your relationship is, no matter how great anything is, there's no way for you to stay happy because you're always finding what's missing. And it's, it's the most common pattern, even during non COVID times on on a lot of achievers because achievers are always trying to figure out how to make the next level the next level the next level and they're like on a hamster wheel nothing wrong with going to the next level yeah i want to ask you something

about this because i actually know like so many of our audience suffer from this and like they're constantly like what's next what's next and like i'm a three in the whole enneagram which is like the achiever piece and when you are in this ambitious community it is something that is almost like plagues everyone because it's like that constant more like I've got this but now what's next and it's like when are you ever at peace with like where you're at like what are some practices that you kind of like teach that allows people to sit in those gratitude moments versus feeling like oh I'll be happy like we start this conversation off I'll be happy when versus I'm happy now with everything that I have. And those things are still things that I want to strive for and I'm still happy, you know, cause I felt like there's this

vicious circle that starts like a lot of people. It's truly just a habit. It's the habit of thinking, right? It's a thinking is nothing but answering and asking questions. People go, is that really true? Well, you just ask the question to see if it was true or not. Right. You know, I do this to myself. Is that really true? Well, that's a question, but you know, are there any other ways of thinking besides asking and answering questions? And I go, that's a question. After about 30 minutes of this, I started to laugh at myself. So all it is, it's a habit. So you can develop a habit. I do this thing I've shared with you, I think, once before called priming. And if anybody wants a free demonstration of it, you can go to TonyRobbins.com forward slash priming. And it's something I do 10 minutes every morning so that I prime my brain to constantly find real things that I'm grateful for. So it starts to happen automatically. Because if you don't do that, the mind is always looking for what's missing. But then here's the second decision that's really important. Do you tend to

focus more on what you can or can't control? What would you say? Again, okay. So I would say I really, and I'm like taking it, it's really interesting because I'm trying to like to breathe in and focus on like what I do on a daily basis. I actually think I struggle with focusing on what I cannot do sometimes. Like, I feel like that is in my like stomach a lot of the time, like, Oh, I'm not good enough or I can't do these. But I also have this like momentum behind me, which like, I guess it's like that courage piece. Like I'll do it anyway. And I like find a way around it. But I constantly have that feeling of like, oh, I can't do this for sure. Yes. And that tends to be true even more for women than men. Men have this false sense of confidence sometimes. It's a bizarre thing. Women are more self-conscious very often. I think

culturally, maybe beyond culture, I don't know. I can't tell you why. But what I will say to you is whether you're a man or a woman, think about this. If you keep, now your discipline and your momentum keeps you going. That's what's made you successful. And that's what you teach people. That's why you're such a great role model. You're scared, but you do it anyway. But if you focus, just think of these two patterns. Don't think of yourself or anybody at home. Just think of them as patterns. If you're constantly focusing what you can't control and you're constantly focusing on what's missing, how are you going to feel no matter what your life is like? You know you're going to be either frustrated or sad or angry or depressed. It doesn't matter who you are.

And then here's one more focus, just for one more pattern. Do you tend to focus more on the past, the present, or the future? We all do all three. But where do you think you spend more time for yourself? I actually, I think I'm in the future. I rarely look at the past. I'm like, what's done is done. And I move on. I try to take the learnings with me. I consciously spend time in the present, but my default is to like, Oh, what's next? Like, can't wait to have that house. Can't wait to this, the business, all those things.

And that's why you're successful. All successful people tend to focus on the future. All people that are overwhelmed tend to focus on the past because you can't change it. But so you say the past is past. So let it go. Right. So imagine just for a second, somebody's home. They were a strong, smart person, but they're not feeling strong and smart because they've been sedentary.

They're not using their body. And when you don't use your body, you don't have that kind of energy. I don't care who you are. Right. You're constantly hearing fear coming at you from all the news that's around there. And so people tend to focus on what's missing, what they can't control, and they think about the past and will the future ever be like that. But none of these patterns are going to help you. But you can change all three. You can train yourselves to focus on what you're grateful for, what you have, and you can always

build on success. That's what creates momentum. You can train yourself to be able to say, okay, if that was missing, that's no problem with it. Here's how I'm going to go after it. Here's how I can find the answer if I don't have the answer. And you can train yourself to enjoy this moment while you're building your future. So those three decisions alone, I could give you a dozen, but I'll give an example. I ask people sometimes in seminars and I've got, you know, 15,000, 30,000 people in a stadium. And I'll say, how many of you know someone who takes antidepressants and they're still depressed? And 90% of people raise their hand all over the world. And so how could you take antidepressants and still be depressed? Well, because all they do is numb you. Back on the side of the box, it says can create suicidal thoughts. So numbing you doesn't deal with the problem. As

long as you're constantly focusing on what you don't have or is missing, as long as you're focusing on what you can't control, you're going to find yourself not having what you want. So it's not that difficult, but what people need is they need to shake it up. You can't do these things, just be in your head, sitting here at home in your head because there's not enough energy. The one factor that changes anybody's life is energy. And that's, so that's why I've done my live events. And that's why I started doing digital events. I didn't want to do like a webinar. I wanted to do something that was a true event. So I built a stadium, 20 foot high LED screens. I created total interactability. So we have people from 195 countries participating

in real time, able to talk to them, connect with them like they are live in, bring them up large, have the impact. So I didn't let, you know, COVID stopped me from being able to help and serve people because people need a new environment. We all need a new perspective. Without it, you're just going to keep doing the same old stuff. And if you want 2022 to be different than 2021 or 2020, it's not going to come by hoping. It's coming by coming up with a vision, coming up with a plan, building a few skills so that you stay strong no matter what they do in the external environment. Yeah, no, I love that. And I want to talk because actually I visited your studio and it was absolutely incredible. That's why we did our mastermind there as well.

And, you know, you taking your in-person events into virtual has been absolutely phenomenal to see. And I just would love for you to talk about your breakthrough event as well. And that's really leading on from a lot of the conversation which we've had today. So what are some things that you're going to be teaching there?

Because I am like a testament to the true power of being in person with you, but I also have experienced that virtually. We've always done our podcast virtually as well. And even on this call, you're like bringing that energy. So just share with me some of the things that you're covering through that and then why people should really make the time for that.

Yeah. Well, I'll tell you what, because people are stuck at home. The first year of 2020 and people are so depressed. I saw how things are going. And, you know, my events were canceled all over the world, you know, because, you know, you couldn't have more than 10 people. I'm used to 10,000, 15,000. So I decided, okay, I'm going to do a free event for people. And I thought I'm going to do two hours. And I thought, oh, that's not going to do anything. People need momentum, as you and I just

talked about, right? And when you go for emergence, like if you learn a language a little bit at a time, you don't remember it two years from now. But if I dropped you in the middle of Italy for 30 days and no one teaching you, you're speaking Italian by the time you're there because you're an immersion. So all my work is immersion. So I decided I'd do two years ago. It's like I'm going to do a free event for five days. I'm going to go 90 minutes a day. And of course, I get into it. Sometimes it goes longer, too, because I just want to add value.

I'm going to cover everything. So we had almost 410,000 people join us. It was the biggest seminar ever. And then we did it again last year because COVID wasn't over. So I was like, okay, I'm going to do this one more time. We had 826,000 people join us from 195 countries. Decided to do one more.

I'm doing it January 25th through the 29th at 2 p.m. Eastern, 11 a.m. Pacific, or wherever you are in the world. But 2 p.m. Eastern is the anchor time. And it's literally two hours a day, roughly, where we're going to take your body and show you how to change that first, because without the energy, nothing's going to change. I'm going to show you tools and strategies you can do immediately to feel that change in your body. I just finished writing a new book called Life Force, and I spent three years interviewing the best doctors, 162 of them from around the world, Nobel Prize winners,

on tools that will maximize your energy. Because when you're low energy, it's hard to have a great relationship. When you're low energy, you're not going to build a business. When you're low energy, you're not going to follow through. Then we get into figuring out what is it you really want and what has gotten in the way in the past. What's the patterns? And let's deal with them right now.

Then we take a look at your relationships because, as I said, the quality of your life is your emotions and your relationships and showing you what you can do to create that relationship or reignited wherever you want to go. And then we look at money. And then we look at what are you going to do with either your business or your career to take a next level. So it's five days total immersion. There's no charge.

Here's why you go. Number one is if you're not willing to settle, you'll be there because there's no charge it's not partially free it's completely free and you don't have to travel so you're able to actually go to it so all you have to do is go to breakthrough2022.com breakthrough22.com and enroll yourself and then we'll join you and you'll have five days it'll blow your mind i love that last year we had a that did this, who would never have gone to an event. And his name is Matt. And he had gotten in a car accident, injured himself,

and had been in bed for seven years. He gained over 700 pounds. And since this thing was available and free, and it was on the computer, and he's on, by the way, on oxygen, told he would never be able to get off oxygen, never left the bed, couldn't even go to the bathroom, had to do it from the bed with the tools that they give. And he attended this five-day program with us. You know, we saw him one point, I put him up on the screen and, you know, said, listen, you can do this too.

And I'm really proud to tell you, he lost 258 pounds. He, for the first time was told he'd never be able to breathe without the oxygen, got rid of the oxygen, got. For the first time was totally never be able to breathe without the oxygen, got rid of the oxygen, got stood for the first time out of the bed, went to the bathroom for the first time, left for the first time, drove a car for the first time. And then I challenged him. I said, if you can lose another 50 pounds, you'll be mobile enough. You can come to my live event in person that we just did a few weeks ago in Palm Beach, Florida. And in the meantime, he met a woman and he's engaged and they both flew there and he walked the fire with us. And he keeps losing weight and doing great.

And it all started because he went to this breakthrough event and it cost him anything for five days. I love that. And I mean, there's just been so many stories like that. That's just one. I know you've had absolutely thousands uh if not hundreds of thousands and millions at this point I just want to ask a couple of questions with regards to like these five points that you talk about you talk about body like what you want

relationships money and business like do you feel like these are like when people go to set goals like these are some of the pillars that they should be utilizing is that like what they'll be doing on during the day is like asking these questions and then setting goals from them. Like where do you, but if you try to do that before you learn to change your emotions and state, it becomes very weak. It's like, have you ever set a goal? I'm going to do this. And then your brain goes, who are you kidding? So unless we take control of the mind and emotion first, setting goals is just an exercise in like New Year's resolutions.

People write them every year and within six or eight weeks, they're back to where they were. So one of the secrets to making this a breakthrough is to really show you how you've created a breakthrough in yourself before. Like most people have struggled with something for years, smoking, drinking, anger, frustration, whatever, not following through, trying to start a business, not doing it. And they get mad at themselves. And they try again and again.

But eventually, some people break through. They have a moment where they go, not another day. I'm out of this relationship. Or I'm never smoking a cigarette again. Or I'm whatever. And my expertise is getting people to those states and showing how to use those states so that now when you set a goal, it's real. And then you can come up with the right strategies too, because if you got this great goal, I want to see a sunset and you start running east, I don't care how positive you are,

I don't care how enthusiastic you are, it ain't going to work. So you need both the shift in your mindset and perspective that will give people, you need the tools and skills that actually work. And then you need the clarity that'll come from that. So you can really turn into reality. I love that. I think that's like such a fresh way for a lot of people to look at it as like the layers of goal setting. Cause I think a lot of people just dive straight into it going, okay, well, I'm going to set this goal. And like you said, they've given, they've given up by the end of January versus like, okay, if I really want to create change, I need to first of all, look at the foundation of my mindset. Then look at if I really want to create change, I need to first of all, look at the foundation of my mindset, then look at what I'm doing and my habitual habits,

which was spoken about the body and just like layering on. And I think ultimately, you know, I've like changed my life significantly over the last few years. And if I reflect back, that's probably the biggest change that I actually started to make was like the mindset and how I exercise my mind. Like I always have exercised my body and just recognizing that, Oh, it's a muscle that you get to change. And I think empowering people just to know that just because you've fought a certain way for so long, like you get to change that. Like it doesn't have to be set in stone on how you approach things every single year or how you approach it or like the depression or any of these pieces, like you can really like lean into some of these changes and exercise that muscle.

And I just feel so blessed to like have met you and met so many people in this space because you guys have been my mentors and allowing me to see that because I grew up with, you know, people weren't discussing this thing, particularly in the UK, like mental health is such a taboo subject. Like you don't really talk about your feelings or your struggles. And I think it's just really empowering and amazing to have,

you know, someone like you and other people like sharing this like wisdom that actually, no, you get to talk about it and you get to make the changes. So I'm just really appreciative for everything that you've given to our audience today as well. And you know, supported Natalie and I on our Boss Babe journey. We really, really appreciate it, Tony. Well, thank you. And I, you know, the secret though, is you can't get someone to do something you haven't done. So one of the beautiful things is you've gotten yourself to make these changes. So you're able to empower other women because you've really done it. Same thing with me. And this is, you know, my, oh, I've been doing this 45 years to give you a nice idea. I started when

I was two, of course, right? 45 years, you know, I could be an idiot at this point. You start to see there's patterns, patterns that'll make you angry, patterns that make you know, in 45 years, you know, I could be an idiot at this point. You start to see there's patterns. Patterns that will make you angry. Patterns that make you sad. Patterns that make you feel overwhelmed and stressed. Patterns that will make you excited. Patterns that make you grateful. Patterns that get you to take action.

And all I'm going to do with people is give them an experience of changing their perspective, changing their body, and then giving the tools to be able to change things. So I look forward to seeing people January 25th through the 29th. It's a 2 p.m. Eastern. And again, there's no cost for it. You can just go to Breakthrough2022.com and love to have you guys there and start your new year the right way. Thank you so much, Tony. We'll put the links in as well.

And if anyone has any takeaways they want to share with us, please tag us as well. I know we both appreciate that. So thank you so much, Tony. It was amazing. Happy New Year. Bye. Blessings. share with us please tag us as well i know we both appreciate that so thank you so much tony it was amazing and we'll see you soon happy new year bye blessings if you enjoyed this episode we would love it if you subscribed and left us a review let us know what you enjoyed what your main takeaways, and who you'd like to see appear on the show. As a special thanks, we'll send you a copy of our Boss Babe 25. Now this is an awesome resource. It's the 25 essential things that you need for personal and professional growth. We've included everything from must-have products, to books, to rituals. This guide literally covers it all,

and I know you're going to love it so if you want your