the bossbabe podcast - 461: How to Trust Yourself Again After a Hard Season in Business

Episode Date: May 1, 2025

After a hard season in business, it’s easy to stop trusting your decisions and instincts. In this episode, Natalie breaks down why self-trust erodes after setbacks and how to rebuild it through small, intentional actions. You’ll learn how to separate fear from intuition, why reflection can easily turn into obsession, and the simple shifts that rebuild your confidence from the inside out. If you’ve been feeling stuck, second-guessing yourself, or waiting to feel "ready," this episode will show you how to start leading again. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Why rebuilding after a hard season starts with self-trust, not strategy 00:50 How failure impacts your identity more than you realize 02:06 The sneaky way doubt starts slowing your momentum 02:58 Fear vs. intuition: a simple framework to tell them apart 05:19 Why self-trust isn’t just mindset work (and what to do instead) 06:46 How small decisions rebuild big confidence 07:59 What really keeps entrepreneurs stuck after setbacks 08:46 How to reflect without spiraling or self-sabotaging 10:40 A practical way to rebuild momentum without the pressure to be perfect 13:13 One tiny decision that helped Natalie reclaim her leadership RESOURCES + LINKS Calling All Coaches: Brendon Burchard Is Hosting A Free Live Training For The Bossbabe Community On April 29. Get The Details To Join The Private Zoom Call Here. Join The Société: Our Exclusive Membership To Help You Build A Freedom-Based Business - start today for just $97.  Sign Up For Our Free Weekly Newsletter & Get Insights From Natalie Every Single Week On All Things Strategy, Motherhood, Business Growth + More.  Drop Us A Review On The Podcast + Send Us A Screenshot & We’ll Send You Natalie’s 7-Figure Operating System Completely FREE (value $1,997).

Let's talk about something most people won't admit, but every entrepreneur feels at some point. After a tough season, whether it's a hard launch, a business setback, or even something personal, you don't just question the strategy, you start questioning yourself. You wonder, can I actually trust my decisions? Am I even good at this anymore? What if the next move makes it worse? And that's what no one tells you about building a business. The hardest thing to rebuild isn't always the revenue, but it can be your self trust. So if you're in that place right now, feeling like you're second guessing every decision you make,

this is for you. Today, I'm breaking down exactly how to rebuild confidence from the inside out, how to stop spiraling and how to trust yourself again, especially, and most importantly after a hard season. Let's dive in. All right, so let's start with why failure erodes self-trust. Because what most people don't talk about is why these hard seasons feel so personal. It's not just that things didn't work out, it's that failure, especially in business, feels like proof. Proof that maybe you misread

the market. Proof that maybe your instincts aren't as sharp as you thought. Proof that you actually can't trust yourself to make the right call. And here's where it can get tricky. When that happens, your brain starts collecting evidence. You replay every decision you made leading up to it. You pick it apart. I knew I shouldn't have launched then. I should have listened to my gut on that offer. Why didn't I see this coming? And then suddenly you're not just doubting the business, but you're doubting yourself. That's why it feels so heavy.

Because as entrepreneurs, our business is often so tied to our identity. That's when the business takes a hit, our confidence does too. And here's what no one tells you. When your self-trust is low, it's not just about the past. It actually starts to bleed into every future decision. You get stuck second-guessing every move, wondering, should I pivot? Should I pause? Should I wait? And then you'll find that the more you hesitate, the harder it actually gets to build momentum. That's the real danger of losing self-trust. It keeps you in limbo, and so you might find that

you actually stop leading. You probably start reacting. You play it safe, but not in a strategic way, but in a way that slowly starts shrinking everything you've built. And the hardest part, you can know all of this logically, you can see why you're spiraling, but that doesn't make it easier to pull yourself out. And trust me, I have been there. Rebuilding self-trust is not some affirmation. It is not about hyping yourself up or faking confidence.

It is about slowly and intentionally proving to yourself that you can trust your instincts again. That you can survive a hard season and come back stronger, not smaller. And that's what I'm going to walk you through next. So let's talk about one of the most confusing parts of rebuilding self-trust. How do you know if that good feeling you're having is fear trying to protect you or intuition trying to guide you? Because when you've been

through a hard season, everything can feel like a red flag. You hesitate to make decisions because you can't tell the difference anymore. Am I avoiding this because it's genuinely wrong or am I avoiding it because I'm just scared to fail again? And here's the truth. Fear and intuition feel almost identical in your body. Both can make your chest tighten. Both can give you that gut reaction of don't do it. The difference is what is underneath that feeling. And so here's how I've learned to tell them apart, especially after seasons

that have really shook my confidence. I believe that fear is reactive. It's loud. It's urgent. It can scream, don't do this, you'll regret it. It's often tied to past experiences where maybe something didn't work and your brain is trying to protect you from repeating that pain. But intuition, I think it's calmer, it's quieter, but it's rock solid. It feels less like panic and more like certainty. It's the voice that says, this isn't aligned, it's not for me, and that's okay. It doesn't need to argue or convince,

it just knows. And the problem is, when you're in a triggered state, everything defaults to fear. Your nervous system is on edge, your tolerance for risk is shot, and suddenly your will shrinks. Not because your intuition is telling you to pull back, because fear is driving the car. So how do you get back to centre? For me, it comes down to time and space. When I feel that good pull, I pause, I breathe, I wait. Because fear demands a reaction right now. Intuition is patient. It'll still be there tomorrow. And I ask myself is this decision coming from avoidance or alignment? Would the version of me before this hard season make the same call? Am I actually protecting my peace or avoiding growth

because it feels scary and edgy? And here's what I've learned. You rebuild self-trust faster when you stop trying to eliminate fear. You stop trying to control it and start learning to hear your intuition underneath it. And it does take practice. It sometimes takes failing again, but the more you flex that muscle, the louder that intuitive voice gets.

And I really do think that is when the momentum starts coming back. And I want to add this, because I really don't think we're talking about this enough. Self-trust isn't just mindset. It lives in your body. When you've been through a hard season, your nervous system can get stuck. You're wired for fight, flight or freeze. And even if you know the next right move, your body might

not let you make it. That's why rebuilding confidence in yourself isn't just pushing harder. Sometimes it's as simple as learning to breathe again, taking a walk, moving that fear through your body so your brain can actually hear your intuition underneath all of that noise because clarity is not going to come to you when you're in survival mode. It's not going to come to you when you're in freeze. It is going to come to you when your body and your nervous system feel safe enough to lead again. Alright so once you start learning to separate fear from intuition the next step is actually rebuilding that trust with yourself. And here's the mistake that we can very easily make.

We can try and do it all at once. We can try and wait for one big moment, one big win to suddenly feel confident again. But confidence doesn't come back in a single decision. It really is rebuilt through small repeated actions that would prove to your nervous system it's safe to lead again. And what's worked for me and actually so many of my clients is creating what I call micro decisions. And that's just tiny moments where you practice choosing, acting and following through. It can be as simple as choosing your own launch timeline instead of asking those three people what they think,

it could be sending that email without overthinking, without waiting for someone to edit or check that it will land okay. Maybe it's saying no to a project that just doesn't feel aligned without apologizing or setting a really clear boundary and keeping it. Because every time you keep a promise to yourself, no matter how small you are

sending the signal, I can trust me. I follow through. I know what I'm doing. And this is so important because most of us after a hard season, don't even realize how much we've outsourced our decision-making. We stop leading and we start crowdsourcing. We think everyone else knows better than us. We start defaulting

to asking our mentor, our team, our audience, our partner, our friend, what should I do? Not because we need advice, but because we've stopped trusting our own voice. And micro decisions can help you take that power back one small choice at a time. And here's the thing, you do not need that next big win to rebuild your confidence. You need to string together tiny wins, tiny moments of self leadership, tiny moments of following through when you said you would, until confidence isn't something you hype yourself into, but it's something you prove to yourself every single day. That's what builds the foundation to lead again, even when the fear is still there.

And once you start stacking those micro-winds, momentum comes back, the noise quiets, and slowly you stop questioning every move because you've reminded yourself who you are. So let's talk about what keeps entrepreneurs stuck way longer than they need to be. It's this belief that if they can just figure it out, what went wrong, they'll never make the same mistake again. And listen, I get it. After a hard season, your brain wants certainty. It wants to dissect every move, every decision, every conversation, because there's a part of you that believes if you can find the exact moment it all went sideways, you will finally feel safe again.

But there is a difference between reflecting and obsessing. Reflection is clean, it's purposeful. It sounds like, what did I learn? What could I tweak next time? Obsession is messy, it's emotional. It sounds like, what the hell was I thinking? How did I struggle? How did I screw this up so badly?

What if I never recover? And when you're in obsession mode, you're not learning. You're punishing yourself. You're weaponizing hindsight against your past self, forgetting that you made the best decision you could with the information you had at the time. And here's what I know for sure. You do not rebuild self-trust through shame. You rebuild it by taking the lesson and letting the rest go because staying

in that spiral, in that loop doesn't prevent failure. It's just going to keep you stuck. It's going to keep you paralyzed, overthinking, scared to move. The real power comes when you can sit down, look at what happened and say, all right, well that didn't work. What do I know now that I didn't know then? What is the gift here? What is the silver lining?

And so you pull the insight, maybe you write it down, you build a system, and then you move on. You let that version of you stay there and you lead forward as who you are now with the lessons learned. Because the longer you spend staring in the rear view mirror, the more likely you are to miss what's right in front of you. And that's really the cycle, right? You fail, you spiral, you freeze. And the longer you stay frozen, the harder it gets to move. Because everything starts to feel risky. Even the stuff that used to be really easy and the way out, like I've said, is not waiting for that big breakthrough. It is finding that first exit ramp, the first small move that reminds you you're not stuck. You're just scared. And those are two very, very different things.

So here's one of the most powerful things I started doing when my self-trust was shot. And honestly, it's still something I come back to anytime I find myself spiraling or second guessing. I stop trying to get it right. And I start running safe to fail experiments. Because the reason that we can stay so stuck after a hard season isn't because

we don't know what to do next. We do. It's because everything feels high stakes. Every post feels like it needs to go viral. Every launch feels like it has to hit. Every decision feels like it could break the business or fix it. And when you're operating from that place, of course you freeze. The pressure is absolutely unbearable. What shifted everything for me was learning how to take the pressure off the outcome and actually focus on the reps. So here's what that can look like in practice. So instead of saying I have to make $50,000 in this launch or I failed. It becomes, this launch is a test to see how the new messaging lands. That's it.

Instead of, this post better convert or it means no one cares. It becomes, this post is just one data point. I'm testing this angle, then I'll adjust. And so you create little experiments, things that feel light enough to try, but meaningful enough to build momentum. Because the goal here is to rebuild proof for yourself, not pressure test your survival every single time you show up. And honestly, this is how some of the best strategies, best offers and best content I've

ever created were born. Through experiments that felt like low stakes, that felt fun, but unlocked massive clarity. Safe to fail experiments give you your power back. They let you move without waiting to feel 100% confident. They create space to be curious again instead of terrified. And when you start stacking those experiments, you rebuild the evidence that you can trust yourself. You start seeing wins, even if they're small, right? And you finally get yourself out of the loop of waiting for the next perfect move.

Because like we have talked about, clarity comes from movement, not thinking. And these experiments are how you start moving again without betting the whole business on every single decision. And like I said, I have been there many, many, many times. I remember one launch in particular, it completely flopped. We poured time, money, energy, everything into it and it barely made anything back. So it wasn't just a financial hit, but it's what it did to my confidence.

And I started questioning everything, my offers, my messaging, my ability to lead. And I found myself rewriting emails 10 times, running every decision past my team. Because deep down from one hit, I just didn't trust myself anymore. And what pulled me out of that wasn't some big win. It was one tiny decision. I picked the next thing and I just hit publish. No second guessing, no overthinking. And in that moment, I proved to myself, guess what? I'm still the one leading this. That's where it starts. And once you rebuild that self-trust, everything about how you lead starts to change. You stop over explaining yourself,

you stop performing for approval, and your business starts reflecting that energy back to you. Because when you trust you, people feel it. Listen, clients buy faster, opportunities come and find you. And suddenly, you're not just surviving your business, you are leading it. That is what's waiting for you on the other side of this. So if you're in that season right now, the one where you feel like you are questioning everything, where you're stuck between knowing you're meant for more, but feeling like you just can't trust yourself to get there. Here's what I want you to hear. You are not broken. You do not need to burn it all down

or find some secret formula. You just need to rebuild your relationship with yourself. One small decision, one experiment, one rep at a time. Because the truth is, self-trust isn't rebuilt in your head. It's not about thinking your way into confidence. It is about acting your way there and proving over and over and over again, that you can make the call that you can lead, even when it's hard. So if you're waiting to feel ready before you move, listen, you're going to be

waiting a very, very long time because the readiness comes after the action and not before it. And if you're sitting there wondering, but how do I even get started building that trust? Here is one thing that I just want you to try. I want you to sit down and write out the three hardest things you've already survived in business, in life, whatever comes up. Then next to each one, what I want you to do is write the skills you use to get through it because I can promise you, the proof that you are capable is already there. You've just stopped looking at it.

So here's your reminder. You've led yourself through hard things before. You've figured it out, even when it didn't look like you would. This season, this is just another rep. And on the other side of it, you don't just rebuild your business, you rebuild you. you. Alright I'll see you in the next one. Wait wait wait before you go I would love to send you my seven figure CEO operating system

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