The Bossticks - #134: Lisa Allen aka Salty Lashes - Young Parents, Advice For Young Parents, Integrity, Struggle, Parenting Rules, & Safety For Your Kids

Episode Date: September 4, 2018

On this episode we sit down with our friend and fellow blogger Lisa Allen from the wildly popular lifestyle blog Salty Lashes. On this episode we discuss young parents, advice for young parents, integrity, pushing through struggle, parenting rules, and divorce.  To connect with Lisa Allen click HERE To connect with Lauryn Evarts click HERE To connect with Michael Bosstick click HERE Read More on The Skinny Confidential HERE To Call the Him & Her Hotline call: 1-833-SKINNYS (754-6697) For Detailed Show Notes click HERE WOO FOR PLAY is the all natural and organic coconut love oil that is changing the way we have sex. With only 4 all natural ingredients WOO is the perfect personal lubricant to spice up your sex life.  All Him & Her Listeners will receive 20% off your entire order plus free shipping when when visiting www.wooforplay.com & using promo code HIMANDHER at checkout. This episode was brought to you by Grove Collaborative.   Grove Collaborative offers healthy alternatives to household supplies and we use it for all of our cleaning supplies. To try grove collaborative go to www.grove.co/skinny Listeners will receive 30 dollars in free supplies a special gift and a 60 day VIP membership.    This episode is brought to you by Liquid I.V.  Liquid I.V. is the great-tasting, portable powder drink mix that is changing the way the world hydrates. The hydration multiplier uses the breakthrough science of Cellular Transport Technology (CTT) to deliver hydration to the bloodstream faster and more efficiently than water alone. Liquid I.V. contains three times the electrolytes of leading sports drinks and is free from preservatives, artificial sweeteners or colors. Go to www.liquid-iv.com and ENTER PROMO CODE SKINNY15 AT CHECKOUT TO RECEIVE 15% OFF YOUR ORDER

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I've been using it forever. It's great between the sheets. So to try Woo, go to Wooferplay.com and inner promo code him and her at checkout for 20% off your entire order. Again, that's wooferplay.com, W-O-O-F-O-R-P-L-A-Y.com, and inner promo code, him and her for 20% off. Buy one for yourself and maybe for a friend. This episode is brought to you by Liquid Ivy, the insane, tasting, and portable

powder drink mix. So basically Liquid Ivy is changing. and enhancing the way we hydrate. Liquid IV uses breakthrough cellular transport technology, also known as CTT, to deliver hydration straight to your bloodstream. We love this. So much more efficient than water alone. So here's the deal, guys.

We use this stuff every time we travel. I like to use it before a workout, after a workout, when I'm hung over. When we're out and about, you just throw it in your hand back, and when you're feeling a little dehydrated, put some in your water. The team at Liquid Ivy is offering all TSC listeners 15% off at check. out when you enter the code Skinny 15. So try this if you're jet lagged or hungover and get the passion fruit and then come you later. Go to Liquid-I-V.com and interpromo code Skinny 15 at checkout to try it. She's a lifestyle blogger extraordinaire. Fantastic. And he's a serial entrepreneur. A very smart

cookie. And now Lauren Everts and Michael Bostic are bringing you along for the ride. Get ready for some major realness. Welcome to the Skinny Confidential. Him and her. Yeah, and if people really knew, like, my full story, no one would ever in their right mind say something like that to me. And I've never, ever, ever shared this before. When I was nine, eight months pregnant with Goldie, maybe I shouldn't share it because I'll cry,

but all of a sudden I didn't have medical coverage. And here I am eight months pregnant with my third baby. And everything else was terrible. And I'm standing in line at for government, assistance. Like, I'm 30 years old. Let's not make excuses for our situation. Like, let's figure out what we want out of life and let's take the steps necessary. Obviously, there's going to be hurdles. Obviously, it's not going to be easy. But if you really have an end goal, you really know that you want to make a good life for yourself and your children, you can do it. That clip was from our guest

of the show today, Lisa Allen, of the wildly popular blog and brand Salty Lashes. On this episode, we discuss young parents, advice for young parents, integrity, pushing through struggle, parenting roles, and divorce. We are back with another Tuesday episode. Don't know who is sitting across the table for me. New hair color, new boobs, new everything, new personality, but that's not so new. Lauren, what's going on? I got my hair died.

I went super, super blonde, like Marilyn Monroe blonde. Calisi. Calisi. Wow. For those of you who are new to the show, I am Michael Bollinger. I'm a serial entrepreneur and brand builder. Most recently, the CEO of Dear Media, which is a new kind of podcast network marrying the digital world to the audio space. And I'm Lauren Everett's wife. I'm the creator of the skinny confidential, which is a cheeky resource for beauty, wellness, and

business. Let's do a little pre-interview here, Lauren. Why did you decide to redo your hair? Do you like want to role play? You keep talking about Calaisi. And your boobs and makeup and everything else. Okay. The boobs was like a month ago. the hell are you? And I talked to Justin Anderson, who I love, and he wanted to try this. And I was so on board. I'm always down to try something new. And I've had the same hair color for so long that I said, what the hell? Let's go really fucking blonde. So here we are. I never seen you this blonde. I love it. I'm obsessed. I feel like I can't have this forever because it would damage my hair. But for now, it's fun. And I love it with a bold brow. And it's going to grow a little bit of root. So it's like perfect. And you feel dimension and everything. So here's how you roll-play boys and girls. Lauren, tonight. We're going to go in the bedroom.

Okay. We're going to get the woo out. Okay. You're not going to say anything. You're going to turn around. Ew, Michael. I'm going to be looking at the back of a different head. Okay.

You're a creep. Role-playing boys and girls, role-playing. It's like dating another person. You can dress as Tyrion Lannister and I'll dress as Gleesie. I'm going to be John Snow. Okay. In your head. The hound with burned face.

Whatever. Let's not get into a Game of Thrones team here. I know you're excited and you want to do that whole thing. You're like Mother of Dragons type thing. We get it. All right. But let's take a step by step here. Okay.

So we're interviewing Lisa today. She is this amazing blogger. I love this interview. She has an incredible community and she's a mom of four. But real quick, before we get into the interview with Lisa, let's discuss Liquid Ivy. I've had so many questions on Instagram. story about liquid IV. So basically it's this drink mix and you carry it in your handbag. You can carry it in your wallet even. It's in this little tiny pouch and you just add it to your water. It's totally

a game changer. It's like electrolytes straight to your water. Essentially it's a hydration manipulator that utilizes CTT or cellular transport technology, if you want to get all fancy, to deliver hydration to the bloodstream faster. You know I love efficiency. So you can use this when you're working out, before you're working out, whether you're traveling, maybe you had too many drinks. All in all, it's so important to stay hydrated, and I feel like this helps. I throw it in my hydroflask. It's super easy. Right now I'm having a huge moment with the Passion Fruit. And the other day, I might have put some in my vodka. So I did vodka soda with the Passion Fruit Liquid IV. I did a little stir, added some lemon and lime, and it was delicious. So I felt like I was being healthy while

I was drinking my vodka. So like I said, liquid IV helps you stay super hydrated and you don't have to worry about any preservatives, artificial sweetener or colors. Liquid IV is dairy-free, gluten-free, soy-free, and vegan. So like I said, we've been taking the passion fruit one. Michael really likes the lemon and lime. That's his favorite. I keep it in my desk drawer. It also comes in asaei, which is good, too. I like you could do a good vodka drink for that. I like all of them, but everyone takes them from me, so. And you know, you could make a lemon lime margarita out of that little tequila. didn't hurt a flea. Liquid IV, I need some more liquid IV. Anyway, liquid IV hydrates you up to two to three times faster than water alone and contains three times the electrolytes of sports drink. So for those of you who

want to try this product, the team at Liquid Ivy is offering all TSC listeners 15% off at checkout when you enter the code Skinny 15. Go to Liquid dashiv.com and enter promo code Skinny 15 at checkout. Lisa Allen is the blogger behind salty lashes. Like I said, she has four kids, which is crazy with her husband, Jeff. She has a background as an esthetician and a personal trainer, plus six years in the fashion industry. Her husband Jeff owns a home design business, and together they're kind of the power couple. Today, she's going to talk about kids, personal stories, and kind of give us a glimpse into her life and the behind-the-scenes of blogging. With that, welcome Lisa Allen to the show.

This is the skinny confidential, him and her. Do you guys get a lot of flack for things you say on here? No, I don't think so. Because I think it's part of like who you guys. You have to though. Part of the persona you've put out there that like you guys speak freely and you're really open and you can say things that like I couldn't say. Ray, we can start recording.

You can get away with it. I think you'd be surprised what you can say. And then just get up all close to the mic. So should I not sit back? No, yeah, sit very close to the mic. Almost like you're about to eat the mic. Oh, that's a way to describe it. Okay.

Almost like you're about to eat the mic. No, honestly, though, you can get away with saying whatever you want because I think you have an incredible community. No, but I think the, I think intention is everything, right? So we can say things. We can get away with saying things because people know the intention behind it's good, right? Like, it's not, we're not malicious. But I think if you, if you're guarded and you don't say what you want, people don't

like that, right? Like, just say what you want, mean what you say, and then people accept it. I mean, it's not going to, not everyone's going to like it, but at least they know it's not BS. Yeah. Unapologetically, right? Yeah, I'm not sorry for. We know you're not sorry. You know what?

That joke would have been a good joke. Since you've been critiquing everyone today, I have a small critique for you that I'll do on air and everyone can vote on it. The hair on the face is a hair too long. Well, Lauren, the peppers in the teeth is a bit too much. I have a pepper in my tooth. We have Lisa Allen in the studio. She's here.

I hear to listen to Lauren and I bicker for a minute there. She just brought us. a huge box like a Costco box. It's a good box. A flaming hot Cheetos. That's right. And hydranias. Yep. Yeah. I'm very excited about it. Hopefully Taylor put it in water. He probably didn't. I probably forgot. All right, Lisa. Let's start from the beginning. How did you get into blogging? So I started blogging back in 2012. Back then, at the time I was a single mom. So I had three daughters. At the time they were ages six. five and brand now. Wow. Well, no, no, no, no. She was two. She was two at the time. So I was a personal

trainer at the time working out of my garage. I had 40 women that came to my garage three times a week, 5 a.m. 545, all throughout the day. And I was happy. Like it was doing well, you know. And then I had a phone call from a girl who at the time I did not know. I knew who she was, but I did not know her personally and she asked hey I have a website I'm curious if you would like to join and at the time I had a family blog you know early 2000s it was more like what Instagram is now like people just posted their family stuff early 2000s yeah but it was and it's been removed from the internet okay you can't find it don't google it yeah don't google it um this audience will find it it they're not to scowler and so anyway she approached me and said hey would you want to do this

blog and at the time I'm like you know I'm really not interested and and she pursued it again and said like I had this dream that we should really do this together and I'm thinking okay I'll try it you know so I said I'll give it a try for a few months and then it turned into five years doing that site and she was East Coast and then I was West Coast I was in Arizona for half the time and then out in Orange County for the other half of the time and it was good It was great. And so when did you meet your husband within all this? So I met Jeff back in, it's been four years, so 2014.

So previously married. Yes. I was married for 10 years and three daughters from that marriage. And then I was single for six years. So holy shit. Yeah. So you're running a blog. You have three daughters.

She's East Coast, your West Coast. Yeah. And you guys, I heard a rumor that you guys. were very, very high up and liked to know it. Like you were crushing. And I remember going to a reward style conference and seeing you from across the room and everyone was like talking about how you guys had this incredible community and conversion. How did you sort of cultivate that? You know what? I think because we got in pretty early, I think that was definitely helpful. I mean, we started blogging. I think reward style was brand new. But when we started, all these affiliate platforms were not really a thing.

Six months into blogging, Nordstrom contacted us back when Nordstrom, like, directly would email you and said, hey, we're doing this baby sweepstakes. We'd love to put you guys on our website, and we'd love to host these giveaways with you guys. So that was kind of the jumpstart, I think, for that site. And then I think we were relatable. We were moms who liked fashion. We both had backgrounds in beauty. have been an esthetician for 18 years. And then fitness was both of our thing too.

So I think we just kind of built this community based on other moms. And it really worked to our advantage. We were speaking of Flack earlier and getting Flack, we're asking if we get it, which we do. In the beginning, when you started blogging, started putting your life on camera, when you have the children, do you get Flack for putting the kids on camera?

Do other mothers reach out and say, what are you doing? Or is that a non-issue? I'm wondering now with social media, because if we ever have kids, I'm wondering what that's going to look like. Yeah, I think there is a lot of, well, you know what, I think in the last few months, I've noticed it less and less, but I think there has been a lot of mom shaming out there. And it's unfortunate because it is by typically other moms. I think I got the most flak.

So I have three daughters. Avery's my oldest. She'll be 15. And then I have Poppy, who is 13. And then I have Goldie, who is eight. And Goldie has her own Instagram account that has just grown naturally. Shout the handle out because it's so funny. It's the Goldie Grams.

And it hasn't been super active lately because she is older and she's more aware. And kids at school are more aware of it. And so we haven't put as much on there, but she is just as funny, I think. And so I think when people started seeing Goldie had her own Instagram account and she was three years old and then four years old, it was a lot of like, what is this mom doing? But on the flip side, so many people love Goldie's account because it's a break in their day that they can laugh and just kind of enjoy a little bit of a moment without recognizing, I think, that it is a mom putting her daughter. I think people can realize it's a mom putting her children online, but for good reason. Your intentions, right? So how much input, I mean, at eight years old, how much input does Goldie have?

I'm assuming. Goldie doesn't even, if you ask Goldie, like how many followers she has, she says like 200. Like she has no idea. And she has, I think, 20 something thousand. It's not some like massive account, but for something that's just grown on her own. Kids at school will say stuff to her like, here are the Goldie Grams or like a teacher will recognize her like her yoga teacher at school, which we live in California. There's yoga teachers at school. Oh, God, that's amazing.

I know. It's pretty awesome. But her yoga teacher recognized her and that just like made her so uncomfortable. She doesn't want people to like, because she's actually pretty shy. So I don't think she wants people to know that side of her. So I guess there's like two schools of thought. There's, you know, because I know there's some parents that say don't put your kids on social. And then obviously there's kids that put, or there's parents that put their kids on social.

And like the whole debate is do the children want to be on social? So I'm not for or against one way or the other. I'm more wondering like what are the comments that you receive from parents. Like what are the negative and what are the positive? I've had things written about, and it really is mainly just about Goldie because she has had more of a spot on my Instagram is that she's so young. I can't believe that you would put your child out there like that. And like I said, I mean, Goldie doesn't even realize this is what she has, you know? My opinion, really with this, and my real opinion is why do people care?

Well, that's the whole thing of mom shaming is that. I'm not worried about what everyone else is doing. Stay in your own lane. If I want to breastfeed and show my nipples on Instagram, that's what I'm going to do. If I want to put my kid on social media, that's what I'm going to do. I don't get why other people care what other people are doing. I think people are bored. I think so.

Well, there you go. I think they're bored. And I also think, you know, when I was going through my divorce, it was pretty open within my community where I lived in Arizona. A lot of people knew the reasons why and they were pretty extreme. and because of that, the people that would talk so badly about what happened and speculate and all that stuff, you know, fast forward 10 years, these are the people that I've seen their lives kind of fall apart. And so I think a lot of people like to deflect their own issues and put it on other people so that they don't have to really think about what's going on in their own life.

So I think that's kind of where the whole mom shaming and all that comes from. some, you've put some thought, like there is some positives that could come out if, you know, as your child grows up and she has a large social platform. Like, obviously, like, you've made a living from it. Lawrence making a living. It's just, I question at, at what point does she, like, have a say and get to take over and how long are you running? You know what I'm saying? You know what? We talked about this. Jeff and I talked about this recently with Goldie's account is that people really love little Goldie. Like, people kind of hold on to that. They have a really hard time with the idea that she is older. And she's really small. So then they really, really,

really question how old she is. People are always shocked when they find out she's eight years old now. And so we've talked about it either like, do we really want Goldie to have control of this account? Because A, I don't know at eight years old that I really do want her to have social media. Avery and Poppy have it, but it's private. It's always been private. You have to like monitor it. Do they want you to tag them? Like are they like, mom, will you tag me? Or do they not care? Oh my gosh. My kids, I tell you, I will put stuff on story and like, well actually that's not true Poppy has reported me to Instagram

like three times that's goals she has reported to me I should start doing that to Lauren you know how shit she puts up on about me report me to Instagram you know what else is tripping me out here guys Ariel's here

yes and I don't Ariel what's the deal here it's like dual it's like dual it's like dual you with you know because I'm so used to Ariel filming us no this is Ariel's moment to show her nose off Ariel are you on the clock I don't know who she's on the clock for buddy Ariel has a new nose new life

I'm collaborating today She's collaborating. Okay, so go on. So Avery and Poppy don't want anything that has to do with your social media. They don't want to be on it. No, they're fine to be on it, and they want the pictures that Ariel takes of them for their own social media. And they're really loving being part of the blog. I mean, that was my whole thing with switching over to salty lashes.

You know, I left my previous site back in November, so it hasn't been quite a year yet. and the whole reason and goal behind it was that I wanted to create more of a space for my family. And that was something I couldn't do on my other site. And it's been really great. I mean, the post that, both of the post, I did a Q&A with both Avery and Poppy separately. And I had them write the post. And because readers knew that they wrote the post and they talked about like, I don't know why this is such a controversial subject. but I talked about how I don't allow sleepovers.

Before Lisa lets us know why she doesn't allow sleepovers, let's talk about Grove Collaborative. Okay, so do you guys want to know the latest? My Grove Order. I had the genius idea, don't mean to brag, of using their search bar for my standout star, which is grapefruit. If you know me, you know I love grapefruit everything. It's pink, it's citrusy. It smells just right.

and it really is the ideal smell for the home. It's so fresh. So of course, you know me and you know I do not like to buy my household products at the grocery store. Nope, I like to streamline things, which is why I get them from my favorite place to scope up cleaning supplies. Grove Collaborative. Okay, so what I picked up this month was the method hand soap, grape fruit of course. That was the first item in the cart. And I like to put this by my kitchen sink. It's pretty. It's pink, like I said. There's also this grapefruit essential oil, and I put it in my diffuser, and it just makes my whole house smell perfect in the morning. Kind of like wakes you up. It's like a zinger. Then there is this all-purpose grapefruit cleaner that's healthy and not filled with tons of nasty chemicals. And like I said, you guessed it, it's grapefruit and it's pink. Just because Grove also carries some beauty products, I threw in the grapefruit chapstick, which Michael steals. It's sort of like a pink tint, which is really funny.

So anyway, my Grove collaborative order this month was very much great fruit inspired and chemical free. So as you guys can see, Grove makes it super easy to discover the best non-toxic products. I know when I'm shopping with Grove.com that I don't have to worry about it. There's products that are good for me, my home, the planet, and most importantly, like I always say, my chihuahuas. If you guys haven't tried Grove, you have to try it, okay? For a limited time, TSC listeners who sign up get an amazing $30 gift set. A free 60-day VIP. membership and a bonus gift just for you when you sign up and place an order of $20 or more. So check out Grove and our special offer at grove.com slash skinny. That's grove. Dot co, not dot com

slash skinny. Grab everything grapefruit. I'm telling you guys. And that has been still the number one post on my side. Let's dive into this. Hold on. I don't like sleepovers either. I'm actually not having a guest room because I don't like anyone in my house. I don't like people to sit on my couch. So I feel like I'm going to steal that rule from you for our kids. I don't I'm not a sleepover mom. It is a good rule. I mean for what is the what is the core reason. Okay. Let's get into it. Okay. You know this I like this show. We go into weird weird subjects. I've never gone into sleepover discussion. But let's do it. Okay. I am such okay. When I was growing up. You know what? When I was used to date girls, I had that same policy.

Not with me. You wouldn't let me go. I couldn't get away from you. That was the policy. Are you fucking kidding me? I, you had a tent with my name on it. I said blanket policy, nothing personal, no sleepovers. Okay. Yeah. Anyways, I'm sure. So I think we have a different no sleepover rule for a different reason. So I wasn't allowed to have sleepovers as a kid and I never understood. I thought my mom and dad were so mean, so terrible to have that rule. And then as an adult, it just makes sense. And it makes sense for a few different reasons. A, you're never 100% sure where they're sleeping, right? You never know what goes on in someone else's house. Behind closed doors, you really don't know. That's a good point. You don't.

Weird. That's actually a very good point. And when you have children, you will do anything to protect them, right? So that's one side of it. The other side of it is that when my kids stay up really late or all hours and night or when they come back from their dad's house and they don't have really structure or rules over there, they're terrible when they come home. And it kills the whole vibe for the family. It makes the rest of the weekend just totally blow for everybody. The dad from your previous day, yes, the father.

Yes. And so it's like when kids don't sleep, it's the same as adults, only it's a lot more irrational, but it's just a bad vibe. And so that's one side of it that it kind of just, there's no point. I'll let them have late nights and they can stay out until like 11, 12. I come and pick them up. If it's a sleepover party and it's like something really important that they're doing something in the morning, I'll drive them back. But nothing really great happens after midnight. And so your kids, like you need to sleep and you also get in so much trouble. And I've heard so many horror stories about you don't know about the parents.

Like it is a really, really good point actually. And you don't have to have other kids sitting on your couch. Well, I know. People say, well, do you have sleepovers at your house? And cousins, totally fine because I can tell them yes or no. Like, I can be totally honest with them. But really, like, I have four kids. I don't need more people in my house.

That makes a lot of sense. Like, I'm pretty like, O.C. about my stuff and Jeff's even more so and so the combination of the two of us it's like our kids footprints are like bad enough I don't really need more who has worse OCD me or Lisa who's worse same similar yeah the booties yeah the booties I'm gonna get you some you have four kids you know what Jeff wanted to get booties you should get the goodies he actually looked at them on Amazon yeah I'm gonna send you guys some my dad was like see you in a week and if you get hurt rub some dirt on it that's fine

You're also a boy. I do think that makes a difference. Boys typically, I mean, obviously boys get in just as much trouble. Listen, when I have a daughter, she's going to be from like 10 p.m. till probably 8 a.m. There's going to be a cage with a lot. I know the key. She's going to be stuck in there.

You're going to be so annoying. I can't even imagine that. Yeah, but the traffic that came in from that and the comments that I got from people that wanted to share their story, because you know when you open up something like that, you're going to get a lot of questions as to why, but then you're also going to get a lot of responses on their reasoning, you know, like, oh, yeah, that makes so much sense or I'll never allow it either because I would, this happened to me at a sleepover. And so it was just more confirmation. I had a child psychologist tell me through a DM that that's the number one rule that they tell

every parent that comes into their office is no sleepovers. I actually like that rule for a girl, especially. What is the most controversial post you've ever done? what got the what got the most like what split the the audience the most like what was polarizing um on salty lashes i haven't done anything i think when i did be anything anything on social anywhere okay i wrote a thing on salty lashes in the very in back in like november december about how we ended up in california because i got a question from somebody that said like how do you live in california you must have family money you must this and it's like no Like you don't have to be a millionaire to live in California.

Like let's just be smart about what you want out of life. If you want to live by the beach, then you can make sacrifices. And so I wrote this post about it. And a lot of people, I think, liked it. And they resonated as far as like, you're right. You know, I've always wanted to like take a risk and move somewhere cool. But I've never been able to because I'm too afraid or I wouldn't able to afford it or all these things.

Like, you're right. Just make better choices. And then the other side, you know, people just assume. Like somebody wrote in and said, oh, it's because, it's because, oh, let's let's be honestly. So it's because of your ex-husband's money. So it sounds like you get a lot of flack from people thinking that you have it easy, you haven't made because of whatever. And so they're making assumptions and that splits it.

Yeah. And if people really knew like my full story, no one would ever in their right mind say something like that to me. Like if people knew that, you know, I went from being married and being very comfortable and having a husband who was doing really well and really successful to having nothing being completely cut off from nothing. I mean, when I was,

and I've never, ever, ever shared this before. When I was nine, eight months pregnant with Goldie, maybe I shouldn't share it because I'll cry, but, you can cry.

When it's eight months pregnant with Goldie and things were just chaos, you know, and I don't fault my ex-husband for this now. I think it was just a bad place that he was in. but all of a sudden I didn't have medical coverage. And here I am, eight months pregnant with my third baby. And everything else was terrible. And I'm 30 years old at the time, you know, still living in a nice house, still, you know, having the things that I had.

And I'm standing in line for government assistance. Like, I'm 30 years old. And I'm asking the government to help me with medical coverage. And it was so humiliating, not because you should be humiliated if you have. have to ask, but because the situation that I felt so guilty that like life choices that weren't not necessarily mine got me in this position. And here I was trying to do the best for my family. My dad said, let me help you.

I'll pay for it. I'm like, no, this is me. This is my family. This is my situation. And so they told me, you know, I stood in line. I'm pregnant. I'm like so overweight, so like depressed looking, I'm sure. And the lady's like, this normally takes a couple months to approve.

But like, I'm just so sad. for you. Like, I'll preview right now. And I was able to have Goldie and it was fine and it was great. And then from then I started being a personal trainer and then I started blogging and I moved my family by myself. I literally knew two people in California and I took off without any help. And we started a whole new life here. I mean, if that doesn't show you that you can pick yourself back up and figure it out. I don't know it does. You can. And that's the thing I always try to like relay that message to people. It's like, let's not make excuses for our situation. Like, let's figure out what we want out of life and let's take the steps necessary. Obviously, there's going to be hurdles. Obviously,

it's not going to be easy. But if you really have an end goal, you really know that you want to make a good life for yourself and your children, you can do it. And it looks different for everybody. It doesn't mean it's California. It can be anything. We've been talking a lot about accountability. And it sounds like you took accountability for your life. in that instance. And I always say like you can choose to let something victimize you or fuel you. Yes. And you chose fuel, obviously. Yeah. And can you tell us some steps that you chose to choose fuel? Like is there something that you incorporated in your day-to-day routine? Is there maybe like a mantra or goal or meditation or something that helped you propel yourself forward instead of being stuck in a slump?

I think for me, kids have been my biggest motivating factor. And I I honestly think that because, you know, here I was going through a divorce when I delivered Goldie. And for me, it was like the motivating factor having, and I always say this, that Goldie saved our family. Like having Goldie and having a reason to wake up every morning, Avery and Poppy were starting school. So they were in like, I think kindergarten and first grade. So they were going to be gone all day. I could have easily hid and felt so bad for myself and had developed, you know, all sorts of things. that could have happened. I could have started drinking. I could have started doing anything to numb the

pain. And for me, having Goldie was truly the biggest blessing. It was the most scary, but it was the biggest blessing. And I got to make a choice right then and there that I can either choose one path or I can choose the other. I made that choice and I've never looked back. And so, like, I guess with my own children, I try to teach them, like, no excuses. Like, I don't want to hear about it. You make a choice. You stick with it. You follow through. And that's just, so I don't know that there's ever been like a mantra or anything that I've told myself. It's just always been there's no other option. How have you been able to build such a successful business while you're going through this with four kids and a husband? So I think that people can relate. I think because I am a mom, I think that helps the maybe a little

bit more relatable. I think that I do a really good job at responding to people and responding to their DMs and trying to get to know people. I think that's super important. And truthfully, I do care what they have to say. I think that because I do have these end goals that I just make little choices and I've been, I don't want to say I've been lucky. I think I've really worked hard for it. But I think that I've been really smart with my decision making on certain jobs I will take, certain things I won't do, and always looking to what's going to benefit my family the most. And are you and Jeff working together or separate? Separate. So Jeff is a woodworker. Jeff makes the most incredible custom doors. That's his specialty. He also does all sorts of like interior woodworking.

Maybe he can make a noise proof door and we can put it up in the house. or can. I was saying Lauren has a voice like a Velociraptor, right? You know, anyways. I'm sorry, he can't hear you through all that hair on your face. Yeah, he's a pepper tooth. Yeah, so Jeff's a woodworker. He's really talented and he does that.

And then I do what I do. Obviously, he's in post and he does stuff like that with me. But overall, like we keep things very separate. How do you have, how do you get him into post? Okay, because Michael is. Michael's in everything. No, ask Ariel. Ariel, I ask him to shoot one photo with me and he gives me one and a half seconds.

Ask Ariel. That's all you need, right? My social media, my strategy is less is more, right? By the way, for anyone who's confused, Lisa and I share the same photographer, Ariel. She's incredible. She is. At Ariel Levy photo on Insta. And she's here with us and she's just giving us all the deeds.

Who's worse, Jeff or Michael when it comes to taking photos? I've never seen Jeff take one. Okay, maybe. She's not going to come through on the mic. Oh, you mean take the picture? I'll go with Michael for right now. Okay. Oh, you mean you ask Michael to take your picture.

No, no, no, no. I want to know how you get Jeff in photos with you. Like, how do you manipulate him into your content? Typically, I'll just ask. Sometimes, I mean, Ariel knows it's like he's really, really awesome the first like 10 minutes of the shoot. And then like any guy, he's like, checked out. Let's go. Let's move this along.

You know, why because it's what Lauren does is um she takes 75 photos and I'm for me I'm standing in the same position so I'm like you could just take the first one and photoshop me and later because I'm literally looking the exact same in every good tip like you have it moved I have not moved I'm like I don't know what's like do I do something different with my smile do I like squint an eye do I like clench a jaw I don't know clench a jaw you know what to do it's not my forte I wanted to ask you what do you think that as a young parent what do you think the toughest part of being a young

parent was. Like what is the hardest, because there's a lot of young parents that are listening. What is the biggest struggle and how do you kind of deal with those struggles? I think young parents struggle, always comparing milestones. I think that's something that, you know, every child is so, so different. Like having four kids, like none of my kids have been, have hit the same milestones or had the same personality or been on the same page, like ever. I mean, Ariel knows this. She deals with my children on a weekly basis and there's a lot. They're a lot in a lot of different ways.

And so I think young parents, you know, people DM me and say, oh my gosh, Ozzie's babbling. How old is she? I'll tell them, oh, my so-and-so isn't. Do you think anything's wrong? No, nothing's wrong. And if there is, your doctor will figure that out. I can't tell you if your child has a developmental delay.

I don't know. I don't even know if mine does. So I think that's the one thing. thing I see with young parents is that there's a lot of comparison, which I think also isn't just with their kids. I think it's across the board. With social media. Yeah. Yeah. Someone asked me what size boobs they should get the other day. And I was like, I need to come to your doctor with you and see you naked and look at your nipples and like should I fly out? Like I can't just like tell you that over DM. Yeah. And like you don't even know what you look like now. Like you don't know how much you're going to

yeah. It's different for everyone involved. Okay. So I want to get down to like time and more. morning routines. Okay. How do you prioritize your time with four children and a business and a husband? So I try to work in the mornings. So everyone's up. I mean, it's a little different right now because it's the summer. So my kids haven't gone back to school yet. So everything is a little bit slower pace. And I'm not getting as much done as I'd like to. But typically I'll take, Avery and Poppy can walk to school starting this year. Starting this year, you guys, I'm going to have one in high school, one in middle school, one in elementary school, and one home. You look. so young to me. I can't believe it. I'm 38, so I'm not super young, but I'm, yeah, I'm definitely

young for Avery and Poppy. That is, that is true. But anyway, so when they're in school, I'll typically get everyone out the door. Everyone's at school by 745. And then Ozzy will eat breakfast, hang out, play with toys for, and I'll have a couple hours to where I can, like, work, get up every few seconds, make sure she's not climbing the stairs, you know, just like, basically I need to hire an assistant or I need to hire a nanny, but I just haven't. done either yet. And then Ozzy goes down for a nap and then I'll work usually a little bit more than I try to get ready, shower, all that stuff. And then pretty much once the kids are out of school though, like my day's shot until everyone's in bed. Like going from field hockey practice to the cross

practice to dance to anything that they're doing, my day's over. So how far in advance do you have to play in your content? You know, I need to work on this badly. Because I, I'm. I'm like a last, I'm a last minute girl. Like if I have a campaign, then I know ahead of time. It's all scheduled. I use the Asana program. Do you guys know that one? Yes, we just started using that.

Does it work for you? I really like it. Okay. I really like it because I get a notification on my phone. And this is good for anybody, not just somebody that's planning, like, blog content. This can be used for doctor's appointments. This can be used for anybody. But I really like that program.

So that keeps me on track as far as, like, campaigns go. Like, I put in there the day I need a show. shoot it the day it needs to be due, the day that it's going live, all of that scheduled, that's great. But like the day-to-day content that is not necessarily half a due date on it, I'm really bad. What would your advice be for someone that's a new mom that wants to launch a business or a blog, but she feels completely overwhelmed by mommyhood? I think you just have to go for it. I think it's a great outlet. I think that if being a mom is super overwhelming for so many reasons and it's so incredibly hard. Give us specifics because I've obviously never been a mom.

Which part? Unwlet. Just how is overwhelming? I want to be careful that I don't get into a sexist space here because obviously I don't understand what it's like to be a mother and never will. But I would say in this day and age, there's opportunities that exist that say you were a stay-at-home mom, you know, 20, 30 years ago. Maybe you're married and your husband's working. That's what I'm saying I'm being careful of getting sexist here. But the opportunity did not exist to create content and put it out instantly to the world. So I think there's so many opportunities now for mothers that maybe are at home that want to produce content. Yeah. And not only are moms at home producing content, but moms have really cool businesses. Like some of, I mean, it had been seven years since I'd had

a baby from Goldie to Ozzy. And the amount of mom businesses out there, the best clothes that Ozzy has are from small businesses owned by moms out of their house. They're the most well made. They are by far better than anything you're going to find at them all. And so I think moms are really taking this opportunity. If they don't want to blog or if they don't want to be an influencer, they're also creating these little businesses that they can still be moms and they can still work out of their house. And they get to do all of it.

And I think that's what's so cool about where we are right now in this day and age as moms that we literally can do both and do it well. Well, the cool thing is a lot of these, what people call little businesses are becoming like the big businesses. It's like my partner here in this business, I always say, I was like, this business with the content creators is very responsible for making many of the women in the household, the breadwinners of that household. I think it's pretty awesome. Yeah, there's a couple of smaller. And then I, it's smaller on a scale, but still really big companies that are doing really well.

One of them is fawn design. Fond design makes diaper bags. She's based out of Utah. She started by hand sewing her first diaper bag. She is doing insane. she's I think 25 or 26. That's crazy. I know.

I want to get into specifics about how being a mom's overwhelming because my. Man, alive. If you're a stay-at-home dad, it's also works for you. I just going to put the dad's. Do you want to be a stay-at-home dad? Fuck yeah, I want to be a stay-at-home dad. I want to show up and grind all day. I think there's a lot more of that showing up.

Yeah, daddy, you can stay at home. Get to work. I love you, you know. Bring it home. How is it overwhelming specifically? like what am I in for I'm because I'm very selfish with my time I'll just be really honest like I like things the way I like it I'm specific I have my house the way I like it I'm gonna tell you now you're gonna struggle you're gonna struggle if that is I'm not joking I'm worried because when Ariel can answer the question when she asked her you know who's more OCD I think because I have kids I have to be less but I was neurotic before children it was like so I'm so controlling I want things a certain way. So I think what your question, the most I feel, I describe it as like treading water.

Every day you are treading water because there's so much to do. And I think having one kid, you know, it's really alarming because it's all new. And a lot of moms are like, I don't want to do this again, but you have to. Have two kids. Because two kids actually great. They play with each other. They occupy each other's time. It's a friend in the house.

And if you've done it once, doing it twice is not a big deal. I think the more kids you have, obviously, your time is even more limited. But there's just so many days where I'm like, I don't want anyone to say my name. Like, don't talk to me. Don't. And I say a lot of bad things in my head. Why don't you want a nanny? I want a nanny.

Why don't you want a nanny? Tell me why. I don't know. Like I said, I'm controlling. Okay. That makes sense. these like, you know, totally irrational fears that they won't do it. The way you want it.

The way I want it. Or that for some reason, my child, because I work out of the house too. And Jeff works out of the house most of the time if he's not, you know, doing an install. So both of us are there and then we have a nanny on top of it. Too much. I just feel like the baby's like, who should I see? I'd like a nanny and a chef and maybe a personal trainer and a manicurist to come in. Can you make that happen?

shit in one hand and wishing the other and see which one fills up first. You know what I say I want more than anything. I want a driver. I want a driver for my children. I want someone to take my kids. I guess that would be a nanny, right? What's a policy on Uber with kids? You know what?

My oldest just took an Uber with some friends. They were meeting some friends up in San Clemente. They took the train. They got on the train somehow. You're supposed to be 16. She's 14 right now. And you've seen that train security? There's no train security.

So they asked for their IDs and all the kids are like, oh, we left them at home. There's like six kids that allegedly left their idea at home. They got on the train and then they did take an Uber and it worked fine. And I told her she could do it, but I knew all the kids that were going. There were five of them. They had to take like a black car. So it's, you know, licensed and all that stuff. And it was fine. I have an idea for Uber. Okay? Let's do Uber kids. And all the drivers have to be screened like a hundred million times by someone. And you have like kid friendly, safe everything. Even some car seats. You have a waters. It's like a really nice car, maybe a big suburban. So if you get in a car accident,

it's big. And Uber kids can show for your kid around. Well, I was thinking like maybe I was a bad kid, but when we were in high school, you know, you're having a couple beers or something, you're running around. And then if people are getting in cars as kids, like that's way more dangerous to me. And I'd rather have, if I ever have children, I'd rather have them call an Uber than get in a car with one of their drunk friends or drunk themselves. Michael and I have, we're talking to this parent. I forgot who told us this, but Monday through Friday, they drive a really safe car to school. And then on the weekends, the car gets taken away and they take Uber.

Just because it eliminates the alcohol. And I think that's such a good idea because in high school, you know, everyone's like doing weird shit and driving drunk. And it just eliminates the possibility of that, I feel like. Yeah. I also think there should be an option that moms or dads can have an Uber sign in their car. And if like I'm down at Moonlight Beach picking up my kids from surf camp, then I can pick up other people's kids

and drive them home and I get paid for it. Amazing. You know how many moms would do that? Why can't you do that? Because I would never charge a mom. She doesn't want to charge. Unless I had an Uber sign in my car. Right?

Michael's wheels are spinning. Michael, calm down. I'm not going to overtake Uber so I'm just shutting that down. Dear media. What is a mistake that you've made along the way at the time felt devastating but was later revealed to become a blessing? I would probably go back to my divorce, I would say.

At the time, it was just really scary, which I think any divorce would be. And it didn't take long to realize it was truly the best thing that could have happened to me and to my family. And now you have Jeff. I know, now I have Jeff. Tell us about Jeff. So Jeff and I met. He was living in the Bay Area at the time, and I was in Orange County. And we were set up on, I mean, you can say blind date.

but not really because social media, but we didn't know each other through a friend. And he came down and we went to dinner. And at the time, I mean, like I said, I'd been single for like six years. So, and he's five years younger than I am as well. So for me, it was just like, this is just like a fun date to go on, you know, like I thought nothing of it. We had a really good conversation. Like he was so cool and so easy to talk to and all this stuff. But, you know, here I am a mom of three kids, a single guy. He was 30 years old at the time and it was just like, this is just like a fun date. And then he reached out to me again the next day. And then we talked every day and got married like a year later. You guys are such a cute couple. Oh, thanks. Like I have to say, it's very nice to look at.

Thank you. The Instagram feeds aesthetically pleasing. Let's put it out. He is such a hunk. I just, you know, before we go. Yes. Book resource podcast that you could recommend to our audience, that really resonates with you. Wait, start that question over again? Book or what? It doesn't have to be author. It could just be any resource. It could be a book on tape.

It can be, it could be a magazine article, anything that you look to a lot. I do, I started listening to podcasts recently. I mean, I'm listening to yours on and off for like a year. I don't,

my problem is I can't turn it on my car. Which ones are you off on? Which ones are you turning off on us? Let's go. It's all. It's putting on the spot. She's like, It's only if it's a subject that I want to, like, hear about.

But here's the thing. Most people listen to podcasts in their car, right? I can't listen to podcasts in my car typically because I have a bunch of kids who don't want to listen to podcasts. They want to listen to music. Here's what you do. You put noise canceling headphones on and just ignore the kids. I know, but I'm afraid I'll get in a car accident because I'm not.

I'm going to be the headphones on the kids. I'm not aware. I know. Yeah. I should. I should actually. Listen, my kids are going to be like bubble wrap, eyes closed, like headphones. They're going to be like one of those salt tanks, you know, and they get them.

I don't even know where they are. I really, truthfully not because I'm on the podcast. I really do enjoy your podcast. I think you guys have the best dynamic. Thank you. I think it is so interesting. I think you guys have a great variety of people on your show.

I mean, you're not like a one-dimensional podcast. You have all sorts of people. And so I think that's really cool. And I just think, you know, your guys' relationship is so fun and funny to listen to. Like, the banter is so entertaining for me. Thank you.

It's got to be, I mean, I think with the podcast, you're going to do hundreds of episodes, right? If it's the same thing over and over, like, you can only listen to productivity hacks or, you know, workout tips or business tips for so long. It's got to be, it's got to be wacky. Like maybe one week you're getting really great information on how to start a business. And the next thing you know, you're hearing about some guy that went on some crazy date and did something weird. You know what I mean? Like, it has to be variation.

So I like that it, you never know what you're going to do. You guys have a great variation. But I have a question for you guys on your relationship on the podcast. is there like, I mean, clearly the jokes that you've had today are not mean by any means, like pepper in the teeth, you know, your facial, none of that's mean. So, but has there ever been anything where after the podcast you're like, you're the biggest jerk that is so mean to say that to me. No, because I think, listen, people, actually, that's one thing.

People give us shit to more to Lauren than to me, they're like, oh, Lauren, you're mean to Michael or Ben's. I don't care. It's all jokes. You have to laugh. It's all funny. If I'm not laughing, I'm bored. So if people get, we like to have fun.

I like a little chaos. I like drama. I like to mix it up. Some people don't like that. I mean, this is our relationship. It's our banter. It works for us.

But you know what, though? I think as like a listener when I listen to the banter, it doesn't sound mean. You can tell when someone's got malintent. Right? She's not like I get it.

Like, you know what I mean? Do I wish she didn't have so many peppers in her teeth? Of course. Like, come on. Like what husband would and what? Next time you have a pepper in your tooth, I'm not going to tell you for three days. Right.

So it just stays there. I think that one's been in there for three days. You know what? My grandma and my dad told me, I said, what's your best relationship tip? And they said, always remain childlike. If you're not, if you're taking yourself too seriously in anything, I think, what, what's the point? Like, you have to be laughing and having fun. Yeah, I agree. I mean, I think a lot of things can be smoothed over too by laughter. Yes. And recovery quickly. I mean, you can't stay mad for too long. We get frustrated with each other. We argue, but we're not like, we'll always go to bed happy. We're always, we're always, we're always, we wake up happy. It's not, because it's not, like I said, it's not malicious and we're always happy with each other. But of course, you're working this close together and you're doing this every week and you're doing other things. Like, you're going to have arguments. You're going to have arguments with any business partner or anybody in relationship. It's just, it comes down to like, are you actually genuinely upset or are you really mad or do you think this person's really doing

something harmful? Like, obviously. I almost pulled a knife on you last night though. You fucking try it. Last night was so annoying. You're right. I guarantee I'm a better knife fighter than All right. Where can everyone find you? Pimp yourself out. Tell us all about your YouTube channel. I love your YouTube channel. Give us all the details.

So we are, the website is saltylashes.com. It's salty hyphen. Is that what it is? Salty hyphen lashes. Dot com. Instagram is at Lisa underscore Allen. YouTube is salty lashes. Pinterest, I'm pretty sure, is salty lashes.

I think it's all salty lashes. And the Goldie Grams. And the Goldie Grams. And then Avery and Poppy. that I think I'm really trying to do different and I think that people haven't touched on in our industry is the teen market. And so Avery and Poppy, their posts have been great. And people also like that women can wear what they're wearing because they're not shopping in kids stores anymore. A lot of urban outfitters, a lot of free people. So their accounts are private for now. We'll see,

you know, as they get more comfortable with it if they want to open that up. But yeah, if you have teens or our teen, they are fun to follow. They're very stylish. They are. I mean, I'm always looking at everything. I love her Instagram, you guys. You'll love it. It's very much like a community, which you know I love.

Thank you guys for coming. Ariel leave you photo. Thank you for taking behind the scenes. Snapchats. Lisa, you're the best. This episode was brought to you by floss.com. Lauren Everett's floss. Thank you.

Oh my God, my ringtone. This is perfect. It's Beauty and the Beast. I thought that was a Christmas song. Hey guys, don't forget to check out the new podcast site over at tcpodcast.com. We also have an accompanying Instagram account, TSC Podcasts, that the women on our team are doing an amazing job of managing. Good job, girls. I have very little input on that, but it looks great.

All of our show notes can be found on the new podcast site. If you ever want to search a topic or look for a past guest or a topic that a past guest talked about, just put in the search bar and you can find some detailed show notes, find individual episodes, find all of our resources, resources that have been recommended by us as well as the guests on the same podcast site. So we just wanted to create a really easy and unique platform for you guys to follow up on new and old episodes. So be sure to check that out at tscpodcast.com.

And lastly, as always, if you guys rate and review the podcast, please screenshot it, email it to ask Lauren at the skinny confidential.com. That's Lauren with a Y. And we will send you my five top beauty hacks straight to your inbox. You guys are badass. We appreciate your support. Thank you for listening. And we will see you on Thursday.

This episode was brought to you by Grove Collaborative. Grove Collaborative offers healthy alternatives to household supplies and we use it for all of our cleaning supplies. To try Grove Collaborative, go to grove.com slash skinny. Again, that's grove.com. Not.com slash skinny for $30 in free supplies, a special gift and a two-month VIP membership. This episode was brought to you by Liquid Ivy. Liquid Ivy is the insane, tasting, and portable powder drink mix. I love the passion fruit.

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