The Bossticks - Crystal Hefner On The Real Story Behind The Playboy Mansion & Life As A Playboy Bunny

Episode Date: January 29, 2024

#653: Today, we're sitting down with Crystal Hefner, widow of Playboy founder Hugh Hefner and author of 'Only Say Good Things,' where she offers a raw and unflinching look at the objectification and misogyny of the Playboy mansion, her stolen young adulthood, and her journey to finding internal validation, while providing a rare look into the final days of one of the most influential men of the 20th century. Today, we're discussing her story and how she got involved with Playboy, and how she became a wife of the infamous Hugh Hefner. She delves into the treatment of the Playboy bunnies at the mansion, how she got along with the other playmates, and how she's healed since Hugh's death in 2018.   To connect with Crystal Hefner click HERE To connect with Lauryn Evarts Bosstick click HERE To connect with Michael Bosstick click HERE Read More on The Skinny Confidential HERE To subscribe to our YouTube Page click HERE For Detailed Show Notes visit TSCPODCAST.COM To Call the Him & Her Hotline call: 1-833-SKINNYS (754-6697) This episode is brought to you by The Skinny Confidential This episode is brought to you by Tecovas Tecovas are handmade from the most premium leathers. Visit tecovas.com and point your toes west. This episode is brought to you by Heineken   100% taste. 0% alcohol. Click HERE to purchase. Must be 21+ to buy. This episode is brought to you by Wild Grain Wild Grain is the first ever bake-from-frozen subscription box for sourdough breads, fresh pastas, and artisanal pastries. Get $30 off your first box at wildgrain.com/SKINNY This episode is brought to you by Harry's Don't settle for the status quo. Blaze your own trail with Harry's.Get started with a $13 trial set for just $3 at harrys.com/skinny   This episode is brought to you by Kroma Use code SKINNY at kromawellness.com to get 15% off + free shipping on a 5 day reset   This episode is brought to you by Squarespace From websites and online stores to marketing tools and analytics, Squarespace is the all-in-one platform to build a beautiful online presence and run your business. Go to squarespace.com/skinny for a free trial & use code SKINNY for 10% off your first purchase of a website domain. Produced by Dear Media  

The following podcast is a dear media production. She's a lifestyle blogger extraordinaire. Fantastic. And he's a serial entrepreneur. A very smart cookie. And now Lauren Everts and Michael Bostic are bringing you along for the ride. Get ready for some major realness. Welcome to the skinny confidential, him and her.

On the side I started modeling, I started doing cheesy stuff, like $25 an hour handing out key chains at bars, you know, like Bud Light Girl or whatever. Then I'd get like Comic-Con. It was just kind of my experience in modeling. I would dress up as G.I. Jane. It was like $650 for the day. Yes. And this is cool. And I met a few girls through doing that stuff. And one of them asked me if I wanted to submit my photo to go to a party at the Playboy Mansion. And that's how it started. Holy shit! Today we are sitting down with Crystal Hefner. You probably know her.

She is the widow of Playboy founder Hugh Hefner. She is also an author, the author of Only Say Good Things, where she offers a raw, unflinching look at the behind-the-scenes of the Playboy Mansion. She talks about misogyny, her stolen young adulthood, and her journey to finding internal validation. In this episode, she is raw, and open. I found her to be very self-aware with a lot of clarity. And I think this gives you a really rare look into the final days of one of the most influential men of the 20th century.

Today on this episode, we're discussing her story from her perspective, how she got involved with Playboy, how she became a wife of the infamous Hugh Hefner, her treatment at the Playboy mansion, her treatment from the Playboy bunnies at the mansion, how she got along with the other playmates, how she's healing, and the power behind Playboy. Her book is phenomenal. I've been reading it. You know that if you're in my broadcast channel on Instagram. And I think that you're really going to be blown away at this episode. Crystal Hefner, welcome to the Him and Her show. This is the skinny confidential, him and her. I have wanted to interview you for so long. I feel like I've gone through six different facets. I think if you check your DMs, there's a couple from me.

over the years. Yeah. And then I might have talked to your PR. I think I like tried to go through one of your friends. I've just really wanted to interview you because your story is wild, the whole story. I'm so excited to read your book. I've pre-ordered it. Thank you. Yeah, I can't wait. And what I think so interesting is you just told me off air that you're not just like telling one part of your story. You're telling the whole story to give context to why you made certain decisions. Yes. I think that's very, very important. If you go way back to when you were young, what was your childhood like before any of this fame, fortune, meeting one of the biggest playboys literally and figuratively in the world? It was hard.

And I think talking about that is important. Being at the mansion and part of that whole process for me was not really knowing who I was. And because of that, it was kind of dictated for me by Heaf. So I think it's important to talk about, you know, I lost my dad when I was young. He was my best friend, and I'm sure people can say what they want about that. But yeah, my parents came with me from England, and we lived in San Diego. My dad was a singer, but they came here with no green cards. So it was a struggle.

We struggled, and it was hard. And after losing my dad, it, it was. got harder with just my mom, you know, single mom, illegally in a country, no green card. So she did what she could and she ended up being a real estate agent and a broker and becoming successful. But we did go through, you know, hard times. And how old were you when you lost your father? 12. That's really young. And also, you've spent a lot of time with them. It's not, it's young,

but it's not so young that you didn't get a lot of time with them. I mean, like losing a parent at 12 years old, it's got to be devastating. Yeah, yeah, it was. I was old enough to remember a lot of things about him, but, you know, it's still young. You know, you don't really know how to grieve or go through any of that. I think it's also too hard for the other parent to know what to do in that circumstance. Like, I'm sure it was hard for your mom to, like, know how to handle that for you. Yeah, it was really hard for her. She would cry a lot, and I felt that I had to, be the parent, you know, snap out of it, tough love, like, stop crying. I just try to like help her through like with tough love and here I am this little child. So, you know, she got through it and now we're, you know, now we're good.

And no siblings? I have two older sisters. They're much older than me. Okay. Were they in the house when your father passed? They had lived out of the house by then. Okay. So my mom is from England, as I mentioned earlier.

and she had my sisters when she was 16 and 18. So in England, back then, you finished school at 16. So you either, if you have enough money, you go to college, or, you know, you just start a family. So she had them young. Met my dad when they were two and four. Her husband was really abusive. Where in San Diego? I started off in Imperial Beach, which is like right by the border.

We grew up in San Diego. Yeah, that's why I wanted to know. Yeah. So we moved to Imperial Beach because it was like the most affordable by the ocean. And then bad things were happening. Like people washed up like trying to try and trying to cross the border like dead. And so and then my dad kept getting arrested because he had darker skin when he would be in the sun. They would tell him like knock off the phony accent.

And they would think he was Mexican trying to, I don't know, across the border or something. So then we moved up to Chula Vista and then my dad passed away and then we moved up to La Jolla village area. I had a stepdad for a while. That was awful. It's in the book.

But I was lucky to have gone to La Jollaia High School. So I went to La Jolla high school. Great school. San Diego State. Yeah. So did I. Really? Yeah.

You guys were probably there at the same time. I went to San Diego State. I did not know that. And I've been best friends with you. since I was 12. Are you sure he went to New York? I feel like that's fake news. I don't know if you were hanging out with Lauren and Crystal. He might have been in a different crowd at that time. I don't think he went to St. Diego State. It was 2000 to 2004. I was running off to bartend though. I wasn't on campus ever. I wasn't either. Yeah. Yeah, I was overall of like the fun after high

school. Two ships passing in the night. We were two ships passing in the night. I was not like into the fraternity. It was like such a big sorority fraternity situation. I hated all of it. Yeah. I wanted to blow my head off. Especially being introverted. Yeah, I think I love, like the school was like good to go to school there. It was nice. It was beautiful. But I think it was definitely for someone who really wanted to get into Greek life.

Yeah. Yeah, it's hard. Sorry to anyone who's like about to go there. People are punching the air right now that were into Greek life. I mean, just for me, it's hard. But, you know, I think my little college boyfriend, he played hockey. so he would sneak in all the alcohol for the Greek people. So, yeah, we were innocent then.

I don't really believe that Taylor went to San Diego State, but that was a good talking point, Taylor. With your stepdad, why was that hard? Because you felt like he was replacing your dad or just he wasn't a good guy? He wasn't a good guy. I think because we had nothing. And at that time, I don't know, he drove a Mercedes and he lived in a townhouse. Like, you know, we thought he was rich.

Like, wow. Yeah, I just felt he had a daughter. I was like second rate to the daughter. And yeah, he just, that was my first experience seeing a Playboy magazine. Your first experience seeing a Playboy magazine. He had tons. They filled his office. So, yeah.

He sounds like a real winner. He has an office full of Playboy magazine. I know. At the time, I didn't like. put it together. I'm like, this guy is just a total perv. Like, I didn't, I didn't think of it then, but then I had opened

some of them, and I just thought like, wow, these women are powerful. They are powerful. I love a Playboy magazine. Famous. They're... Listen, I love a Playboy magazine. I've just never heard of a guy having an office full of them besides Taylor. Guys used to collect them, and they used to collect the issues. Oh, I didn't know. Okay. Oh, my gosh.

There's so many things that's just now. Yeah, they used to collect them because the articles were good. You could look for the bunny logo on the cover. So every issue, like, oh, I got the issue

to find where the rabbit is or the articles. Our producer watches porn for the artistic aspect. No. I like the story. That's like reading Playboy for the articles, right? No, but I think it was different than like other magazines,

maybe like penthouse stuff like that, because like it was built on like cool articles. with the women, right? Wasn't that how it started? Obviously it was about a lot of the imagery too, but there was an aspect of a lot of guys aspired to be like, oh, I could be a Playboy if I read this thing, right?

Isn't that what it was? Yeah, there's a lot of things with that. So, yeah, I guess it was tasteful. Other publications that would catch like celebrities topos or something would post and Playboy wouldn't necessarily do that. They also, yeah, there was a lifestyle. So Huff, I think it's based on the kind of older films where they had like the smoking jackets with the lapels.

And it was like a lifestyle. And he became like Mr. Playboy himself. And I think products came out. And yeah, people to be cool and sophisticated. It was like a part of it. So how does one go from San Diego State to the Playboy Mansion? Like what is the in between? So weird.

Well, I mean, yes and no. Like, it's not so far from L.A. You're beautiful. You're blonde. Like, you check all these beautiful boxes. I know that he was very particular. So I'm not like, I just want to know, like, how are you, how do you even get to the mansion? Well, I was studying psychology.

And I thought that I have enough of my own problems. I don't know if I can be a psychologist or I have like a nine to five thing. And on the side I started modeling. I started doing cheesy stuff, like $25 an hour handing out key chains at bars, you know, like Bud Light Girl or whatever. But 25 an hour was, you know, decent then. And then I'd get like Comic-Con. So you guys are familiar with all the stuff because I'm standing here you go.

I used to live right on Front Street. You know where Richard Walker's Pancake House is? You know those two little buildings that look like two little green twins? Yeah. I used to live in that. Like that was like right when I got out of school. I came there. And we used to run around downtown all the time back in the day.

Yeah, like Seaport Village. Exactly. Very cool. Yeah. And Comic Con was huge down there. It was like they shut down the street down there. So when you're at ComicCon, is someone approached you about Playboy? No, so it was just kind of my experience in modeling. I would dress up as GI Jane.

I was like $650 for the day, yes. And this is cool. And I met a few girls through doing that stuff. And one of them asked me if I wanted to submit my photo to go to a party at the Playboy. mansion. And that's how it started. It's so interesting, though, because he, to me, seemed like he was so detail-oriented. So for you to send your picture in to get to be married to him, like, that's a, there's a whole lot of story in between there. Yes. So when you submit your photo, was he the one that was looking at it? Or was it Mary, the girl we saw on Girls Next? Or like,

who is looking at these photos saying yes or no? There's a. like a whole office of people that are just dedicated at that point just dedicated to finding girls for parties there's rolodex of of girls they would just go through so what happened was on the back end they all go through the these submissions and based on what they think hef likes which is crazy they pick these girls and i didn't think i'd ever get picked honestly but I didn't get pegged. And once the girls go up there, they take a polarite of view, like the parking garage, basically. And those are the photos that HFCs once you've already come to the party.

And then HFs is just to get into the party. Just to get into the party. Nothing is just to have access to the party. Just have access. You have to submit your photos. You have to get approved. Then you have to go up to where these shuttles take you to the house. and in the garage they take a polarite of you

and then I learned all those go to Heff. So you still go to the party, but then after that you're getting rated by Heff. It's like A, B, C, D. And you've already been rated. No, but I didn't know about this. No, but I'm saying you've already been rated to get into the party and then you get another rating.

If half gets the Polaroids, then Huff is taking the Polaroids and rating them. Is that correct? Yes. But I'm saying even to get the Polaroid, you have to first be rated by the other group. Yes. Oh, yeah, yeah. It's like a double bedding process.

Yeah. So after the party, Heff has all these polarites of like a fresh batch of women and he rates them A, B, C, D. So those all go into the Rolodex. They're like literal drawers that pull out in these offices with all the polarites of the girls. And for things in the future like Fun in the Sun or other parties that they have in the mansion, they will pull out the A drawer first. and all those girls will get invited,

whoever have rated A, and then they'll go to the B's, and then depending on who can come or can't come, then they'll go to the C's and the D's. And let me ask you this. That's how it worked. The draw or the appeal for you at that time, we're like, I'm just going to casually submit

if I get invited, great, or is it like... I get it. I get it. When I was that age in college, like you're having fun. Like, I mean, I would have loved to go play my mansion. But I'm saying it's like, is this something you're aware of

or you don't know about this process at the time? Is there like competition to do this or you just you don't even know this process is taking place? I had no idea. Okay. I had no idea. Later on when I met the group that did the rating system, I asked, you know, how did those first photos? And they had me as a 10. It's like, wow.

So you were an A, obviously. Yeah. So Hugh picks you as an A. Yeah. So I go to the party. That's where I meet Huff. I meet him at the party. This is before the Polaroid

Or like I didn't realize I was an A on the Polaroid Until I stayed for the weekend He has a little box That the picture is in Of the girls who are staying there In case he forgets what we look like

And that's when I saw my A You got really built a life I know It's so weird It's cult It's cult It is It's cold

It is Yeah I'm sorry I'm a modern day cult. It is, it's, from what I've perceived, I've read the books, I've listened to the podcast, this is my own opinion. He created to me, like, a harem of competition and he would use his soldiers of women against each other to create chaos and he would step back as the hero. Like, I feel like he read like a hundred books on power. There's like, it's so deep. It's. It's so deep.

I feel like, people just think like, oh, it's a guy that like it's with young women. They're so much more to the manipulation. Like, looking back, you must feel like that. I think looking back, I realized this was a time before, it's a time before you could just be an Instagram model. It was before. You had leverage. So many things. You couldn't create a podcast.

You couldn't do other things. You couldn't. There's gatekeepers. Yeah. Gatekeepers. Yep. Yeah. You know, it's funny.

Like, I always say. this on this show. There's a lot of young listeners, then there's also listeners that are our age and older. And I feel like we are the cusp generation that grew up without all of these things, but then got them like right around our 20s, right? That's when they'd all kind of like, but there was like this whole life before that where none of these things existed to your point. Like you couldn't, you didn't have any of your own leverage, right? You had to get basically permission from people in power to be seen on certain platforms. Yeah, I completely agree with that because I, there was this woman.

when Instagram was getting big and models were getting big on their own she said to me, this is so cool now women can have the power without like a rich old white man making the decisions and then she's like, oh sorry and that was that was me you know when I saw the Playboy magazines

and knew of that it's like this whole life that it's like power and fame and fortune and all these like I could be somebody yeah because now women are able to do, women and men are able to do it without having to get on a publication like a playboy or a whatever because you can just do it from your phone.

Not that it's easy, but you know, you can do it without somebody in between. You just immediately like if you have the talent or the reach or whatever, you can get seen. Yeah, absolutely. We didn't need a radio company to start the show or some network. Like we literally just started doing it out of our living room. Yeah, that's amazing. What do you think made you so sparkly to have? Like you, I mean, you're beautiful, yes.

But like, as you said, there's all these beautiful women. He has his pick. There's something about you that he was, there was a magnet. So what was that? Honestly, I think there's a photo of this in the book. But I'm just standing at the ropes. And I'm this blonde girl with these like big old implants that I'd got it that just before then. I think that was the factor of like come on in literally it based on appearance purely I think until

we started talking I was shy and I always started talking about college you know I hear that he likes when a girl says they're in college because I'm like he said oh what do you do and I'm like oh no like I don't have a job what do I say like modeling but not like a real job like I felt just not worthy to be in his presence. I'm like, oh, you know, I'm finishing up at San Diego State. And then you're like, oh, you know, I went to University of Illinois. What are you studying? And psychology.

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What's your take? I think that so many people fed his ego and he had so many yes people around that to him it was all normal. Like, hey, we're going to be here and we're going to do all the things that I want to do. But it's what everyone wants, he assumes. Like it's, I want that. Everyone wants that. It wasn't even just like the people around him, though, but it was the whole culture too. I mean, they had the television show and they had all the, you know, they would do all those events in Vegas.

people find them. I think a lot of people that are maybe younger listening, there's like, how could this, like this could not happen now. This would be shut down in two seconds about, if I was raiding people with cards, you'd be like, this guy's got to go, he's not going to last. But it's just a different time. And I think to your point, it wasn't, I don't think it was just his internal people, but it was like the whole culture, all of society was thumbs-uping this and saying, okay, this is like, this is fine.

Absolutely. And you had your big celebrities. Sure, according to the parties. You know, you had, there's a picture of Arnold Schwarzeneguze. of Arnold Schwarzenegger, like, flexing with a girl on, like, each arm. You know, I was told, you know, Arnold coming there all the time was a bit before my time, but I was told that Arnold would show up and they would go around like, oh, who wants to sleep with Arnold? And someone would be like, well, I will, you know, crazy.

Crazy. To me, now that I look at it from an outside perspective as a mother, he seems like a gnarly narcissist. Like, I think one, I would say, one of the biggest narcissist I've ever seen in my time. Yeah, a very charming narcissist. Yeah, which is the most dangerous. Yeah, they're all charming, right? Uh-huh. I wonder, I would be, I would love to read his real autobiography because I bet there's so much

that happened to him to get to the point to be so narcissistic. Did he never write anything? I don't think I've read an autobiography by him. I think everything written for him and about. him was very favorable right to him yeah but real no I would I would ask him all the time questions about his childhood and how he grew up and I understand from the things he's told me like you can understand how he could get to where he was absolutely that's very very mature and empathetic of you thank you yeah that's evolved so when you're in this house

with all of these people and there's always like how much time do you guys actually get to spend together just you and him? Or is it there's always people around? There was always people around, which was hard for me being kind of introverted. It's not just like you and him at night going to bed in the house. Yeah, yeah, it would be. After we were married in 2012, when we got married, yeah, 2012 at the end. Yeah, it would be just us. After movie night, of course, we'd go up and it would be just us. Wait, tell us about movie night. Like, there was, like, specific nights for specific things.

Was that actually, like, really that serious? Yeah. In the book, I say it was a cruise ship it was, which absolutely was. What do you mean? Monday's Manly Night with the guys. Tuesday's Domino's, Wednesday's card night, Thursday's movie night, Friday's old movie, Saturday's old movie, Sunday's new movie from the theater. Do you ever get to pick the movie?

movie? I did on Thursday. And I would pick movies that like no one would like, like the Little Mermaid again. Just piss up all his friends because I'm just like, why are these people here all the time? It's like they're a country club for them, I guess. So how do you, so maybe we skipped over this, but how do you get to the point, okay, so you're there and you're getting invited to the party and then he's showing interests and then at some point he decides like that he wants you to be his wife and he's going to propose, right? And at that point, with you, you in the age gap, like what,

there had to be, obviously, some kind of appeal and charm and a reason that you wanted to marry half, obviously, outside of just him being half. Like,

did you guys actually fall in love? Or is this, like, how does that all work? Because he was powerful and because, even though it was kind of a twisted situation, like I did feel safe. What do you mean by,

why do you think it was twisted just because of the, because of who he was in the age gap? I mean, getting into it, like, twisted because he's, 60 years older because it's all about him

my feelings don't really matter because sex was a group activity I mean there's like a lot of twisted situations you would have to have the other women involved. Yeah other people were involved every time. Yeah

it got to the it got to the point where I would ask somebody specific to like oh can you come up because I didn't want to do it by myself Oh, okay. So I guess

But that's what I'm asking you. I actually have a question. Is it because you don't want to do it by yourself? Because you're like this old penis with balls to the knees. Like I can't suck this flaccid limp dick. Or are you like, do you want someone to come up because like you want to like be able to offset because you're like I'd way rather hook up with a girl than him?

Or just because you're just like you? Like what was the reasons? I think it was because I felt like, oh, like what am I like supposed to be just like the show by myself? This is awkward. So you can diffuse it. Yeah, I guess. Pressure. But my question is, is when you look back,

were you actually, like, wanting to be with him, like, as a boyfriend? Or did you, like, look to him more as, like, a friend? And, like, then when you had to have sex, you're like, oh, let's diffuse this situation. Yeah, this sex part was not enjoyable at all. Ever? No.

It's so weird, though, because I feel like he's got to be, like, kind of good at sex to have all these women around him. No. No. No. Well, that's disappointing. Come on. Oh, see, that's the narcissism, though.

That's the narcissism because he probably thought he was king of the castle, King Kong, at sex, and he's not even good at sex. Well, because everyone's telling him that he is. So everyone's telling him everything he wants to hear. So wouldn't that mess? I mean, that would mess with me. Well, of course, if you're just like sitting there and everyone around you saying how great you are, you're like, I believe this. And then are you questioning the sex we had this morning?

Are you like, does Lauren really like the sex? You'll never know. If I had a friend to defuse the sex sometimes, that might help me out. I'm sometimes tired. Okay. Let's talk about it. It's kind of nice. It's like, oh, it's offset this.

So when you're there and you have this access and you just saw, like, what is the end reason why you decide, okay, I'm going to marry this person? Like, if you, if, and again, if the sex wasn't good and if, I don't know if the love connection was there. Like, what's, what kind of like headspace were you in when you said, okay, I'm going to do this? It sounds like he provided some time with security. Yeah, I felt safe there.

I felt like it was somewhere. I belonged, I felt really, like, wanted at that point. I felt needed. I felt sorry for him. Yeah. He was getting older. It wasn't like an actual proposal where he got down on his knee and asked me. He just kind of gave me a ring. I'm like, oh, I guess, I guess we're doing this. I'm here and let's do it. It, you know, maybe part of his PR thing as he wants the chapter to be wrapped up just gets married

at the end you know it was the final chapters of his life was there anything that you liked about being around him like you look back fondly on

I feel like he taught me taught me a lot he was very smart he had a high IQ yeah he was always like writing notes and it has like little quirks and things that I remember

and some habits that I've picked up So, yeah, he loves scrapbooking, huh? Yes. Did he make you scrapbook, or did he scrapbook himself? So he has 3,000 scrapbooks. We have them stored in a vault. And he would go up every week, and he had a few employees that worked up in the scrapbooks,

scrapbook room. Only job is scrapbooking for it? Only job. Wow. there was like scrapbook department, video department. There's a lot of departments, but they would kind of lay it out for him, and he would do all the captions.

And as a way to kind of connect with him, I asked him, you know, do you want me to come up with you? And I'll take some photos of the stuff from the scrapbooks, and we'll post it on Instagram. And so we would do that. And hashtag scrapbook Saturday, post some photos.

But those have all been taken down now since everything. Me too. and, you know, down to the little details of, you know, be like playing bad gammon and then, like, a few people in there we don't really know the names. So I don't want to, like, have women in there where they're just nameless, you know, that's, you know, I don't think that's fair. So we just took it all down. When you're doing all of this is the show Girls Next Door, like, what's the timeline? Has it already been on? Like, when you were coming in, are you, are you?

getting a vibe from the girls who are already there? What's the crossover of that? Okay. So the show was in 2009. It was early on when I was there. What we were talking about now is like after like the wedding is like 2012. So 2009, we were told that we would be filming the girls next door. So basically it was swapping out Holly Bridget and Kendra and then it would be me and the twins that were there. Christina and Carissa. And I don't know how I felt about it. I talk about it in the book where it was kind of dictated to me what I would do and how I would behave. It wasn't a fun experience.

I don't think Holly Bridget and Kendra were happy that they were replaced. It would have been cool for the show to follow them in their new lives. But, yeah, I didn't go past season six. And when you came into the mansion with the twins were those three girls, living there or had they already transitioned out? I remember Holly's shoes were under the sink in the master bedroom. I think they were still transitioning out. And was that like awkward?

I felt insecure at the time because they had been on TV all this time and obviously know the mansion inside and out. And I'm insecure. I'm, you know, young and just kind of, you know, feel. like an idiot or like I'm in their turf but you know over the years that changed. Is it a nice environment in there with the other women or is it a catty environment where people are like competing to get attention or or do people get along? It seems like I mean I think the reason I'm injured this seems like such a strange environment to live in every day. It's like a Alice in Wonderland or something.

And you're worried because there's older women, not only say older, but older than new women that are going out and then you're coming in and I'm sure there's other women trying to come in. It's like this whole like... It's a game. It's so interesting that you say that you were insecure because here you are picked as a 10 or an A on the polar ride. You say, you know, you have these big boobs, this blonde hair and he's so attracted to you, but yet you're saying you're insecure, which is so crazy. Most of the, you know, beautiful women I've met are insecure. Why?

The best looking people are the most insecure. Why is that? I've noticed that too. Why? I'm not sure. I mean, I would see when. women come up and everyone's in bikinis and things and have the most perfect bodies that I, you know, would kill to have. And they would go and get butt injections, implants, food.

Food stuff, knows everything. I think it's because for men and women that are blessed with those kind of looks is a lot of the times other qualities, whether it's your intellect or sense of humor or, you know, something that has to do with something other things than the way you look get overlooked, right? And so you're just validated for the way you look. And over time, that becomes people's identity. There's probably a lot of people that are listening to say, oh, like, boo-hoo for the good-looking people. But in a way, it's like you have all these people that instead of judging you on anything else, it's just like, oh, there's the pretty person or there's the handsome person or

whatever. And it kind of, it starts to form your identity. And so you start to think, okay, if that goes away, then do I have any value? Yeah, completely. And also pressure, pressure to stay that way. So I think that's why they might do these procedures. I mean, I think when you, when there's been such an emphasis on your looks for so long and the looks go, that's got to be a mind fuck. It's been a real challenge for me in my life. Someone did tell me when I was bartending, I told you this, I was 21 years old.

I'm bartending. Right over your head, Lauren. No, it didn't. It didn't go over my head. We get it. I'm bartending and like bending over the bar and like showing some tit and like, you know, flirting with guys. And my friend goes, you better find something.

other than your looks to lead with because they're going to go. And I was like, whoa. They do go and fast. They do go. And you know what? I think that's a very good lesson. Everyone should find something more than their looks because it does go. And if you're basing your entire existence off that, that's a really hard pill to swallow.

It's really, really hard. Yeah. The last handful of years with my therapist, you know, I'm only. doing stuff that doesn't involve looks. Because I had like the Instagram T&A thing. That's how my Instagram started and that's how I got to so many followers. And then

I'm like, okay, now it's just going to be the real me, who I am. Like, I don't even like that stuff. I didn't even like those photos when I took them, editing them. It's like I was contributing to the toxic culture. And so now it's changed. You can't even

find a bathing suit picture of me on there. And all the things I am doing now are not related to my looks. It's probably challenging. I have two younger sisters. And I understand putting up the certain kinds of photos that are going to get attention on Instagram. I get it. I get it. But I will say that it's like you can't, it's difficult to position because sometimes

then people will get upset about only getting attention for that kind of thing. And then they'll try to change. I'm like, it's this weird dichotomy where you get a ton of attention for doing that. But then you start to be like, well, this is not really the kind of attention I want. Yeah. And it's, but I think it puts specifically women in a very difficult position because you're getting validated for something that may, that is good for an initial boost, but you may not want in the long run, right?

And then it's hard to transition out of that and move into other fields. Yeah, I completely agree. People sometimes get upset from me saying stuff like that, but it's true. It's like the stuff that gets you the initial tension is maybe something that you wouldn't want attention for later. Yeah, I agree. If there is a theme of this show, if there is a theme to Lauren and I's lives, if there is a theme that I am trying to pass on to everyone that listens, it is the theme of breaking the status quo, doing things differently, doing things differently. And you know who else is shooting out on your own path without regard to what everybody else thinks? Even if you look at this podcast, this has been nothing but breaking status quo and doing things differently, which is what has led to so much personal success and fulfillment in our lives. And you know who else has broken the status quo? Harry's. Harry saw customers getting ripped off by question. products in the shaving industry and decided to do something better. Instead of charging the

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Again, that's Squarespace.com slash skinny to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code Skinny. Were you with Heff when he passed away or did you guys separate before that? What was the timeline on that? I was there for a decade. So I was there Wow, that's a long time. It's interesting because people don't realize that. Just because we weren't super public, only in the first few years, I was there for a decade. It was at 2010 to like 20?

When did he pass? As there, 2008 to 2018. If he was still alive today, do you think you would still be with him? He'd be 97. I don't know. You can't look back and answer that, I guess. I don't know. I know when I was there, I was.

would think like, oh, okay, like when happens this age, I'll be this age. Well, how long did it take you to step outside and observe everything you went through? Was that something that was happening as he was dying? Or did it take time for you to step outside of the picture to see the full landscape? It took a while being away. Yeah. To really understand. It took me trying to navigate dating relationships where I'm like, okay, this way that I'm behaving is really not normal. And it's like the things I've learned, like have rewarded me for being codependent. He rewarded me for just being with him all the time. Rewarded how? Just, I guess, like a puppy, like praise and you're the best and all the things. There's a lot of

verbal validation. Yeah, I'm like, oh, I'm doing something right. Like, how awkward. But learning that, okay, you know, they have their thing they do, I have my thing I do, and then we come together and it's healthy. Like, the relationship stuff has been hard. Yeah, I've been in therapy for five years. When you transitioned and have passed and you decided that you didn't want to share the things you were sharing on Instagram, what did that look like? Was that like a strategic thing or did it happen naturally?

It wasn't who I was and I didn't feel good with any of that stuff. I never did. I hated all of it. I hated all the stupid outfits for the parties. I hated heels. I hated being in bathing suits or people commenting gross stuff on my pictures. Like, why? Why am I putting my body on display? Like, I don't need to do that. For what? If you reflected back and thought why? Like, why put yourself through all that if you hated it? I think to be thinking, to be accepted, that's what F1, that's what society wants. That's what's expected of me, I guess. But now I'm like, you know, dressed like a grandma. No offense to grandmas.

Grandma's out there pissed. When I decided I wanted to do an ex-plant, you were one of the people that I went to their page. And you've been really open about your journey. I would love for you to talk about that, why you decided to do that, what symptoms you were experiencing, and if you feel better.

know. Thank you. I think helping people through what I went through with the X-plant has been like one of the best things ever. So I appreciate you mentioning it, bringing it up. When I was at the mansion, F was older at this time, I noticed there was like mold at the mansion and I got diagnosed with Lyme disease and I just, every symptom just not feeling well all the time. And then I'm And somebody had commented on my page about breast implant illness. And at the time, I had no idea what that meant. And so I did what research I could. There was a Facebook group.

This woman named Nicole, she had a Facebook group. And at the time, it was kind of gaining momentum of people that were sick. And there was a website, Healingbreastimplantilness.com. It's still around if anyone wants to go to that. My symptoms matched with pretty much everything on the site. and I just got worse and worse and worse. What symptoms? Everything.

Brain fog. I knew I had the words, but I just couldn't. I couldn't grab them from my brain. My whole body was like burning and on fire. I was tired. I was just canceling stuff left and right. I'm like, why am I so lazy? fibromyalgia, like everything is just hurting.

I'm not like I would like to hear kind of what you went through. I would get different types of rash, and weird things happening to me. And at the time, there were two doctors who did X-plants, both women. And one was in Ohio. I think the other one was in Florida. And I'd heard that Yolanda Hadid had just gotten hers taken out. And so I scheduled with the same woman that took hers out.

Dr. Fing. Dr. Fing. Yeah. She's in Pepper Pike, Ohio. Yeah. She is incredible. She does what's called a total capsulectomy or an M block. She has like open heart surgery tools.

She's like in there scraping the shell off of my ribs. Implants are gross. You know, there's so many chemicals in them that are not natural at all. Like if it doesn't come from the earth or if it's like, you know, why are we putting it in our body? I don't know. And it's sad. And I know people who are sick. that still have their implants and they're like, I can't take them out. I can't.

You have them and you have these big boobs and then they almost become sort of like an identity. They do become an identity, but I think part of removing them was me kind of like, I don't, that's not me. I don't want to care around these like heavy boobs. It sucked. You know, like getting, how many CCs did you have? I had 400 CCs. They were very big. I think around there like 400 or 425 something like that. So you had big ones like I had, the big boobs. Yeah, I never had a say. The doctor just put him in and...

What do you mean you never had to say? Like, did you get these before you went to the baby? Yeah, I did. I did. But he just made the judgment call in like what size. Okay. It was big. But I remember looking at the photos in the back in the day, I'm like I look like a

sex doll from China. Like it's embarrassing almost like props. They were, like, it was like props for me. It was almost like I could hide behind my insecurity and I think women's like kind of use it as a shield. That's interesting. Like sometimes how people put their hair in front of their face instead of like pull it out. It's kind of like a shield like that. That makes sense. To be avoid being like vulnerable or yourself or you have this like, you know, I have this. It's interesting. But when I came out of surgery, my lungs felt twice the size. like, whoa, I can breathe. My pain in my neck instantly went away. I'm like, wow, this is just the first time I had surgery where, you know, you wake up better instead of, and I was, I was happy. And after then, it's like, I do not give a shit. I'm like, if anyone like me the way I am,

and if you don't, then buy. Like, that's, that's just how I feel now. And you opened up about your fat transfer experience. And can you talk about why you did that, what your experience was, and then you said after that you were done? And from what I read on your Instagram. Yes. Things are still like scars and didn't go so well, but I don't care anymore. To be honest, I think the scars are kind of cool.

I'm not just saying that. I think it's just kind of unique. Scars show what you've been through. Well, and also, you mentioned all those symptoms. she had a lot of similar stuff, and for the longest time, we've both, we'd known each other for so long.

I was like, I was like, what the hell is going on here? We couldn't figure it out, right? And when I picked her up from the surgery, I thought she was going to be

all out of it and all upset, and she was so happy and all those things. She was like, that was the first thing you said, is like, I can breathe. Wow.

It was crazy. It's crazy how you can breathe. And she was like happy, and I thought she was going to go home and be down and she just all this energy. Yeah. It almost feels like relief. Yeah,

it does. It's like, imagine having a weight hanging off your dick for, no, for 18 years, a weight's hanging off your dick and then they remove the weight. Well, it's a crazy concept. I think a lot of, you know, people listen. For me, it always, when she went so, she had two, right?

Or you went the, I had two boob jobs. Well, the first, she got a redone. And the second time was so big. Big, big. And I remember just thinking, like, how are you going to like, what's your posture going to be like? because there's no way you can have you're constantly getting pulled forward

from the top. Yeah. You just wanted it to be redone? I had them when I was 18 and then I had them redone because it was like 10 years later. And I had great doctors and it was a really great experience.

I just noticed things. Like I was sensitive to light. Really sensitive. Like when someone turned on the light I was like, why the fuck do you? I was like pissed. I'll just like turn the light on in the morning to wake up.

Or sensitive to smell. Yeah, that one's still going away for me. Rashes. Rashes. Just like things that I was like, but I started to, it also, this is so weird. I've never said this on air, but it, like, there's something about it that is off. It lowers your frequency. Yeah.

I feel like I'm, like, vibrating. I know that's, like, very, like, woo-woo, but I feel like I'm vibrating at a different frequency without having something on my heart and my chest. But it was also weird, like, to hug my kids without. having something blocking that. It's very weird. The problem is it's such a weird

experience to get them out. There's not a lot of people to talk to about it. You know what? I may be ignorant to this but what I found strange is she kept telling me you have to redo this

every 10 years. I'm like okay if you have another 50 years you could do this five more times than have all these surgeries every 10 you know like

that's not going to be good right? Not to freak anybody out that has them but like you have to do you have to get them done every time? I think anyone who has them

like and you love them great have them. I'm not here to be like, oh my God. I'm just talking about my own thing. But it's not like changing a veneer or something every 10 or 20 years. It's like you have to rip your body open every, you know, time you do it. Yeah, I definitely thought like I don't want to keep doing that. And yeah, I mean, I have friends that are sick.

I hope that they eventually get theirs out. I've also noticed there's, I've gone like kind of far into this. But there's the brand Allergan and then the brand mentor. I have noticed that my friends with mentor are kind of better off than my Allergan friends. Huh. I had Allergan. Huh. I don't know what I had.

I have to look into that. It's interesting. Yeah, I'll have to look into it. Well, the doctor showed me too when you were out or when you're under him, he probably showed me a video that he filmed of the capsule when they take everything out and what it looks like. To your point, it was not appealing. Didn't get you hard? No, it was not a. Oh, like the hamburger thing around the implant?

Just like all that. But then like he said there's like this film that can come and leak out. out into it. He was like showing me. Yeah, it's your body like that hamburger thing that they cut off. It's your body like rejecting it. It's your body forming scar tissue and just like trying to protect itself against this foreign body. To wall it out of the rest of your system. You did not like the fat transfer. Why? Well, after I had the explant, I thought, I don't know, I, she said, oh, I like the tissue to be healthy and then you can come. back for a fat transfer if you want to.

And after six months, and it was two years later. And I just thought, oh, maybe, like, I should put something there, you know, just. So I went and got a fat transfer, and it was a terrible experience. Why? It hurts, and I lost, like, half the blood in my body and had to go to the ER and get a blood transfusion. Getting fat taken from like everywhere in your body just recovering from that is so painful. Why did you have to get a blood transfusion? So in order to get the fat, the doctor fills you with a lot of fluid. So you look like kind of big and swollen and so that they can they can get

the fat easier. So you have all these little holes all around your body and after the doctor, this particular doctor, left the holes open so that the fluids could drain out, and so the whatever could drain, I guess the fluids could drain out, but then blood's also draining out. So that all went happened, and then my period was like the same weekend, so I just bled out and ended up needing a blood transfusion. So I definitely do not recommend the fat transfer, but it's definitely better than putting in the implants, I think. And after that experience, yikes. Are you like, after that, are you just, you said on your Instagram, you're like, I'm done. Like, this is me. Completely done. Completely done. And anyone that you don't want to be in a relationship,

if, you know, if they don't like you the way you are, then it's not your person. How has dating after all of this, you mentioned like early on, but how has it been later on now that you've had all these revelations, you're in therapy, like you're doing your own thing, you have your own book. How is dating now, like today? It's better now. As, you know, recently it's better. But I think having to kind of start their process at 31, I think it was, was hard. So I had to go through, you know, bad relationships and red flags and, you know, seeing them as green flags or giving people a year when they deserved like a month of my time. I just saw this thing on, on Instagram. It was so good. the guy's like, why are you waiting a year or two years when you see red flags in two weeks?

Yes. If you see the red flags in two weeks, get the fuck out of the relationship then and there. Why are you giving it another two years? Nip the red flags in the bud right away as opposed to wasting one to two to three years of your life. This can be a TikTok clip and everyone's going to be mad in the comments because people in the red flag relationships are going to be triggered. I hope they get out of the red flag relationships. I mean, I, like, I'm so, now I'll, like, FaceTime people because I'm like, I don't want to even waste my time. Like, you'll get their energy before you go on a date.

That's a good tip. That's a good tip. That's a good tip. That's a good tip. In the beginning, were there guys there that were maybe there for the wrong reasons? Not even just because of who you were, but because of who you had been with. Are there guys like opportunistic guys or just weird guys that are coming around because? I think I've been doing a good job of weeding those kind of people out.

Good for you. Where are you at right now? with how you want, like, the next five years to go? Like, who are you now? Like, separate from the Playboy Mansion, separate from everything you've been through, being married for 10, I mean, with him for 10 years. Where are you now? Like, what's the future for Crystal now?

I think now, you know, I'm on a good trajectory. I'm just doing me. I'm single and happy. And, yeah, I bought some properties over in Hawaii. So I've been kind of just going back and forth. Yeah, when I was at the mansion and making some money there, I started investing in houses and found a real love for real estate. So I'm developing and flipping houses. And it's a lot of fun. I add a lot of like natural elements into the homes. Just grounding. Natural vibes.

You're like no silicone is in this house bitch. I know. And I won't even like use a toothpaste as fluoride or I'm on the same. I'm on the same. same vibration. Especially after you get them out, you're like, get all this shit away from me. Yeah. Just don't want it anymore. In your book, what can people find that they will be shocked by? Like, give us a little preview and then where they can find your book? I think they'll be surprised at what was the hardest for me to write. And those are all the scenes that involve sex or death. I'm really excited to read your book. Everyone can find it on Amazon. Yeah. Yeah, it's on, it's everywhere. And I have a website, only say good things.com. All the links are there.

Only say good things. I'm going to think that Hugh Heffner used to tell you to only say good things. Yes. So he put me on his foundation as the vice president. Now I'm the president. That's an interesting gig. Yes. I'm still on his foundation. and he told me that when he's gone, he wants me to only say good things about him. And I said I would. And so is the book only good things?

No. I broke my promise. I think you talked about his balls, Lauren, on this, as old balls. I said it. She didn't say it. I didn't say anything about it. When I go, when I go, I want you to say, no matter how old I am, that my balls were always young.

Let me tell you some things. everything's fair. So, you know, maybe I might sag one way or the other, but you're going to say, listen, handshake, I will say that they were always firm and perky for the end of your days. Your balls. No, no, I'm talking about you. Oh, okay. Okay. I'm saying we're making the agreement that like, we're going to hold that. So if anyone digs me up, like, listen, you don't have to look at that guy. He was always. That's a great name for a book, though. Only say good things. I could actually, I feel like, I mean, I didn't know him, but I could see him saying that. Yeah. Since then I think it's important to tell the story from someone else's perspective.

I think Keph has controlled the narrative for so many years, and I think it's time for people to know more stories of other people. Well, think about how much juice that guy had on everybody, because you had all these people that going over there and all these different positions of whatever they're in, power, whatever, and they're all partying. I mean, he probably, I mean, that guy, he had the information. He definitely did.

I do think one thing that's so interesting about him, though, is he, you can tell he was so concerned about how the public viewed him. And he was so obsessed with what you just said controlling the narrative. So it doesn't surprise me that he said only say good things. It's like he couldn't fathom that there was anything but good things. Like he almost couldn't take it. His ego couldn't take it. Correct. Crystal, I think you're amazing to come on here and share your story.

where can everyone find you and follow you and see what you're up to and look at your new evolution on Instagram and buy your book? Only Say Good Things.com for the book. Crystal Hefner on Instagram and all social media until that last name changes back. You're waiting for the last name to change. It was actually like the huge machine of the mansion that changed it to Hefner. So I'm not really quite sure how that process works. It's hard to get your Instagram handle changed.

I do know that. I know. It's like all. thing. Those are like so many of my comments. Why aren't you change your name back? Maybe somebody to Instagram will listen to this. Leave me alone. Someone on Instagram reach out to Crystal.

Crystal, thank you for coming on. Two things before you go. You can watch us now on YouTube. So you can go on YouTube, search the Skinny Confidential, and watch our entire episodes on your computer or TV. Also, you should know Michael and I are doing a him and her newsletter. So basically it's a him and her tip. the day, five days a week. And the tips are very specific, as you can imagine. And then we also

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